Balance Is Bullsh*t: The Truth About Motherhood and Self-Care

by Elisha Beach

Redefine self-care to fit your real-life version of motherhood.

Motherhood is a high stake, no joke endeavor. So is the amount of pressure society piles on moms. And the push for “self-care” has become just another thing for moms to feel guilty about because, yet again, they can’t live up to the unattainable idea of motherhood or how to balance it. Stepmom of four, birth mom of three, and adoptive mom of one, Elisha Beach is here to call bullshit on this unreachable balancing act.

Beach is not a self-care guru. She’s just another mom who found her way to that moment on the motherhood journey where she realized she had prioritized everyone else’s needs while completely neglecting her own. When she realized things needed to change, she drew on her skills as a certified strategic planner and set out to rediscover what she needed to support the many roles she played, how to get her family on board, and—most importantly — how to prioritize herself.

Balance Is Bullsh* The Truth About Motherhood and Self-care shares what Beach learned about moms struggling with “doing it all” and empowers them to take back their self-nurturing. With a humorous and honest take on the real-life experiences of motherhood, Beach shares her own missteps, unrealistic expectations, and the reality checks that forced her to completely reassess her self-care practice and build a new approach that celebrates mommy wins, implements grace while embracing the chaos of motherhood, and tosses out the impractical garbage for effective strategies for moms to take care of themselves.

192 pages, Paperback

Published November 11, 2025

Reviews

[Lexi readingwhilehot · Rating 4 out of 5]

Charming and validating in a really approachable way. The author has a “momfluencer” tone, not focusing on research or the big whys, and focuses on how to actually make some changes in your self care. Perfect for people just beginning their journey in “oh shit I have to take care of ME First??” Which I think the length and tone worked great for!

Thank you publisher and NetGalley for the free copy!

[Christina Davis · Rating 4 out of 5]

I need Elisha Beach to read everything to me. She has such a delightful way of speaking that manages to be both calming and energizing.

As for the content of the book, this is an incredibly validating walk through the difficulties of modern motherhood. I feel like this book functions just like a mom in that it takes on various roles to meet the needs of a variety of people - acting as a memoir, self help guide, and a talk with your best friend (if listening to the audiobook). While many of thoughts about burnout and overwhelm in motherhood aren’t unique to this book, I appreciate the way the author describes the reality of what it feels like to go through it and then provides practical guided questions and prompts to help you take an inventory of what you do, what you wish you could do, and what you can let go. When you’re already overwhelmed, having someone walk you step-by-step through all the things to consider and how to apply concepts like SWOT analysis and SMART goals to your life is an invaluable help.

My only complaint was the occasional confluence of maintenance/routines with self care because I do feel like we need to be careful about framing regular things that people need to do (e.g., showering, flossing) into acts of self care just because you're a mom. I struggle with the gendered nature of self care discussions and would’ve loved to see more of that here, but I see the benefit to her keeping her focus entirely on mothers. She does a great job of including mothers in various contexts - working or SAHM, partnered or single parenting, co-parenting easily or difficultly, supported by a village or isolated, feeling financial pressure or not. This book truly should be accessible to all.

[Robin · Rating 3 out of 5]

Balance Is Bullsh*t by Elisha Beach is a funny and swear-filled self-help-type book that gives validation to stressed parents, particularly mothers. I listened to the audiobook, which is narrated by the author. I enjoyed listening to her voice as she told personal stories of chaotic times during her years as a parent to many children. While I enjoyed the levity and catharsis that the swearing and personal accounts brought, I didn't find a lot of actionable steps that would reduce my stress levels. There were a few, but many of them were dependent on having hours of time to research and contact governmental agencies or having a reliable friend and/or family network nearby. Some would also cost a lot of money. Early in the book, Beach suggests that the reader make many lists of all the things they do to keep the family and household running. For one, doing that would take me forever. It also made me anxious just thinking about how stressful that would be! I think it's a good book if you want to laugh and feel seen, but I wouldn't go into it looking for a lot of suggestions on how to dig yourself out of your hole of overwhelm. I did really enjoy her list of simple self-care ideas at the end of the book.

Thanks to RBmedia. Recorded Books, and NetGalley for a review copy of Balance Is Bullsh*t.

[Rose Raymond · Rating 5 out of 5]

In Balance Is Bullsht: The Truth About Motherhood and Self-Care*, author and strategic planner Elisha Beach delivers a refreshing, 192-page antidote to the pervasive cultural myth of "having it all." Drawing from her extensive personal experience as a stepmother of four, birth mother of three, and adoptive mother of one, Beach rejects superficial self-care tropes and unattainable standards of maternal perfection, offering instead a grounded, highly realistic roadmap for everyday mothers.

Combining her background in strategic planning with humor, raw vulnerability, and sharp cultural commentary, Beach equips readers with actionable systems to audit their personal capacity, delegate household loads, and secure family buy-in. Rather than treating self-care as an intimidating, luxury item on a mother's endless to-do list, she reframes self-nurturing as an essential, non-negotiable foundation for emotional well-being and long-term family health.

Empowering, witty, and deeply validating, Balance Is Bullsht* is an outstanding recommendation for busy mothers, blended family parents, and women’s lifestyle readers alongside works by Kendra Adachi (The Lazy Genius Way), Eve Rodsky (Fair Play), and Jen Hatmaker.

[Chelsea Hamilton-Viele · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved how real this book was. The way the author describes her own struggles with burnout and Super Mom Syndrome; real life examples of medically complex kids and crazy schedules. She was really encouraging and made me feel seen and my feelings validated. I also appreciated the step by step guidance on how to figure out what you’re doing, what you don’t need to be doing, how to get what you do need to be doing done more efficiently and effectively, all while making sure you remember to take care of yourself. This was a really beautiful, strong, well written read.

[RebeccaReviewedIt · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was such a great listen. The author narrates, and she’s really been through it. The author has 8 children, all with varying needs. As you can guess, this book is both funny and profanity-laden. She sounds so relatable; I just want to be her friend. (Elisha, if you need another friend, call me!) She’s much more extroverted and willing to share than I am, but it’s great. She gives such personal examples. I think this one would be best listened to, but having the print copy as well for reference and performing the exercises. This was a good one. Thanks so much to Netgalley for my audiocopy!

[Angelica · Rating 4 out of 5]

This isn't your typical self-help book and for that I'm glad. It was very relatable and I found myself nodding more than a few times. I loved the guidance (question prompts and reflections) provided throughout the book to find an inner balance rather than trying to "get it all done". There is no get it all done, there's doing your best and remembering to give yourself grace along the way.

I received an ARC via NetGalley and am leaving a voluntary review.

[Shannon · Rating 3 out of 5]

Just an okay read for me. I didn't really feel like it offered anything new I hadn't read about in other self-help, motherhood/parenting books like Fair Play or Honest Motherhood. It was decent on audio and a quick read so if you feel like you need to hear that it's okay to not be okay or that motherhood is hard, it's worth a listen/read. Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an early audio copy in exchange for my honest review.

[Kauriana · Rating 3.75 out of 5]

I skimmed a couple of chapters and didn't do all of the exercises, but I really appreciated the perspectives this gave me in preparation for motherhood. I want to do all the from-scratch, organized household, well-balanced children things...but the fact is that I can't and I won't. And that's okay! It's good to focus on my own health along with my children's.

[Malea Guidarelli · Rating 4 out of 5]

While I didnt necessarily find anything new and enlightening, it was filled with nuggets of wisdom and reminders that women who are parents need to hear regularly. It’s a great reminder that we aren’t alone in our parenting journey.

[Kaitlyn (ktxx22) Walker]

DNF’d this at 25%. This is a HOMEWORK book. You need the physical book and a notebook in order to get through it. She’s very real, but since it’s a workbook vs a narrative style book it’s not an enjoyable audiobook activity. I would recommend it though if you’re really struggling and need ideas.

[Caity Dolezal · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is great for anyone who has littles in their lives and forgets that in order to take care of them you have to take care of YOU. Relatable, funny and witty.

[Alina · Rating 5 out of 5]

From the very first page, it felt like Elisha Beach was speaking directly to me—my struggles, my reality, my constant juggling of work, life, and parenting. This book hits hard in the best way possible. It’s honest, refreshing, and unapologetically real.

I loved how straight to the point it was—no fluff, no sugarcoating—just truth. It’s empowering to read something that validates the chaos instead of trying to neatly package it into “perfect balance.”

Such a great, relatable read that so many of us truly need.

Thank you to NetGalley for the free and advanced copy of this book!

[Bookbubble · Rating 3 out of 5]

Balance Is Bullshit by Elisha Beach immediately pulled me in because I already agree with the premise. Balance is not realistic for most mothers. The pressure to “do it all” is a real source of stress and burnout.

I expected this book to cover a clear explanation of why balance is bullshit. But I specifically hoped for actionable strategies that answer “so what do I do differently?” and how.

For the most part, the book feels more like a memoir with self-help elements than a practical guide. The book validates the invisible load women carry and the unrealistic expectations placed on mothers. A lot of the insights will feel familiar.

However, most of what I’ve heard in the first half is not especially new. The advice leans on familiar ideas like prioritizing, habit stacking, scheduling time for yourself, and asking for help. These are useful, but they are not developed into a clear system that works when real life gets messy and unpredictable.

If you are mainly looking for validation and perspective, this may resonate with you. If you want a concrete plan for measurable behavior change, Atomic Habits is probably a strong place to start.

While reading this book, I noticed a lot of ADHD-coded language. It's worth noting that a lot of women are missed for ADHD diagnosis. Consequently, ADHD and undiagnosed ADHD can make motherhood feel especially overwhelming and like you're a failure. Many moms may unknowingly deal with more than overload or poor prioritization. If your struggle feels constant or unmanageable, consider doing a quick ADHD symptom checklist and then decide whether to seek a formal evaluation.

I listened to the audiobook narrated by the author. Elisha Beach’s delivery is one of the strongest parts. Her voice is warm and engaging. You can hear the emotion in certain moments, which adds authenticity. It is an easy listen, even at a faster speed.