The Overthinker's Guide to Making Decisions: How to Make Decisions without Losing Your Mind

by Joseph Nguyen

A companion to the New York Times bestseller, Don’t Believe Everything You Think

We always intuitively know what to do deep down. It’s only when we’re clouded by racing thoughts (driven by anxiety and external influences) that we get stuck and don’t know what to do. Your intuition will always take care of you when you trust it.

Every single day, those who suffer from anxiety and racing thoughts have a singularly challenging time with something we all have to make decisions. Whether big or small, getting to the other side of indecision with peace and clarity is something we all crave, but some of us have a very hard time getting there. Fear and doubts crowd in, making any action impossible.

Just as Joseph Nguyen has provided relief to hundreds of thousands of readers through Don’t Believe Everything You Think, he now invites us to move beyond intellectual understanding into practical application.


Original essay by the author. Exercises that help the reader frame the decision, identify their fears, get to the route cause of these feelings, unlock their intuition, and then make a decision. Select poetry by the author plus inspirational quotes from notable people about the art and philosophy of making decisions.

Genres: Self Help, Nonfiction, Psychology, Audiobook, Personal Development, Mental Health, Professional Development

192 pages, Hardcover

Published November 11, 2025

Reviews

[Beth · Rating 2 out of 5]

can’t decide how I feel about this book.

says a lot about how it failed to achieve what the title sets out.

[Dr. B · Rating 2 out of 5]

This could’ve easily been a blog post instead of a full book!

I really wanted to like this book, but the constant repetition drove me crazy. While the tone is friendly and easy to read, there’s very little real value. If you’re looking for something short and to the point, this isn’t it.

[Amanda NEVER MANDY · Rating 3 out of 5]

“Your peace does not need to be sacrificed for someone else’s comfort.”

I didn’t love the journaling/worksheet shit, but I loved everything else. It is a bit repetitive, and it doesn’t need to be as long as it is. I know many will gripe about those things.

I would recommend this book to experienced self-helpers looking for a voice to reassure them that they are on the right path. It really is that hard to make yourself a priority. People like to fight against it and make you feel awful for the decisions that you make. Stay true. I promise it is worth it.

“Those who truly love you want your authentic happiness, not your compliance.”

Three stars to a book that gave me the boost I needed.

[Jess the Shelf-Declared Bibliophile · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a very basic, cursory glance into taking a step back, practicing some breathing techniques, and thinking objectively before making a decision. It wasn't anything profound, but I did still enjoy the audiobook.

[Laura · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐎𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐞𝐫'𝐬 𝐆𝐮𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐌𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐃𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬. It’s a short but insightful read that encouraged me to take a closer look at how and why I make the decisions I do, and what’s influencing that process. I found myself highlighting 𝙨𝙤 𝙢𝙖𝙣𝙮 statements that genuinely resonated with me.

Yes, there’s some repetition throughout, but that didn’t bother me at all. In fact, I think there’s real value in it. Sometimes hearing the same ideas phrased in different ways helps them truly sink in.

The bulk of the book (about 60%) is dedicated to guided worksheet space, walking you through the TRUST decision-making framework. The same exercise is repeated 50 times, allowing you to apply it to multiple real-life decisions, big or small. The final section includes low-stakes exercises to practice making choices with less pressure, which I found really helpful.

Overall, I found this book both practical and grounding. Joseph offers a gentle, self-aware approach that brought me a lot of clarity and awareness around my own decision-making habits.

Special thanks to the author, NetGalley, and Authors Equity for the gifted copy

[Heather Daughrity · Rating 3 out of 5]

The first third of this book receives five stars. The pages are full of gentle yet firm guidance on why we choose based on fear and simple ways to change our mindset. I found much of the information and instructions to be inspiring and helpful.

The second third of the book is mostly workbook pages the reader is intended to use daily, weekly, or whenever a difficult decision pops up in their lives. This section contains a lot of repeated information from the first third of the book. Roughly half of these "worksheets" are the same exact preface and questions, intended to be filled out as needed (there is also a QR code to download and print these worksheets).

While I found the information and guidance on the first third of the book useful, I was annoyed that so much of the book was simply repeated instructions and questions.

If you're looking for a short introduction followed by a workbook format, you might enjoy this one. If you're looking for deep psychological writing and scientific understanding of the curse of overthinking, look elsewhere.

[Morgan Reese · Rating 4 out of 5]

So short so it was like why not read this and I think it’s got a lot of good little nuggets of wisdoms or whatever in there about reframing overthinking and I think if you owned a copy, looked at it consistently and did the exercises it would help a lot but I’m not doing all that I just wanted to see what this book was about. if I fall into a pit of overthinking later in life I’ll know to come back to this book 📖 👍

[Oz Lubling · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found this book pure gold. The message is profound and applicable to some many people I know. I think the point of this being a book and not a blog post is so you can use it as a reference time and time again. I definitely plan to do that. highly recommended!

[Olivia G · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.5/5. Maybe I completely miss the point of self help books, but it feels like every one is like "lol don't actually worry about your anxiety babes 🤪." I actually took stuff away from this one but for so few pages, it acts like it can solve very very complex issues in such a simple manner. Maybe it can but (like most other self help books I've read recently) it seems to ignore how complicated the world can be. The author seems very nice so I feel bad giving it a mediocre review.

[Elisabeth Aubut · Rating 3 out of 5]

This short book offers helpful insights, although not revolutionary, into how fear and perfectionism lead overthinkers to struggle with decision-making. I appreciated the reminder that clarity often comes after we start moving through small, imperfect decisions, as well as the practical tools and self-talk prompts at the end. The reframing of “good” and “bad” outcomes was also helpful, acknowledging that difficult paths can be blessings in disguise. Though written from a secular, humanistic perspective, it still encouraged me to reflect on trusting God more in the outcomes of my imperfect decisions.

[Lydia Maxwell · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book contained some good truths in it. However, I would not recommend this book to someone who is pretty self-aware. Also, it was a bit too new age for me.

[Krystal Myrick · Rating 4 out of 5]

I liked it a lot better in physical form. Do I think it will help me make decisions? Meh. Will I remember things from it? Yes, possibly. I am glad to have reread it.

[Jung]

"The Overthinker’s Guide to Making Decisions: How to Make Decisions Without Losing Your Mind" by Joseph Nguyen speaks directly to anyone who feels trapped in endless mental loops whenever a choice appears. It starts from a deeply relatable place: the experience of replaying options over and over, opening countless tabs, asking for advice, making lists, and still feeling paralyzed. Nguyen reframes this struggle not as a flaw or weakness, but as a sign of exhaustion from carrying the emotional weight of fear, regret, and the pressure to get everything 'right.' Instead of offering more techniques for analyzing better, the book promises a gentler, more human approach to decision-making rooted in self-trust, emotional awareness, and alignment with the life you actually want to live.

A central insight is that overthinking drains far more energy and joy from your life than most imperfect decisions ever will. Small choices start to feel enormous because your mind loads them with meaning about your future, your worth, and your safety. The longer you delay, the heavier the choice becomes, and the more your body reacts with tension, restlessness, and anxiety. While you wait for certainty, time passes, opportunities fade, and experiences that might have helped you grow never begin. Staying stuck is itself a decision, and often one that causes more pain than taking a risk and learning as you go. Nguyen emphasizes that this pattern is not laziness or indecisiveness by nature, but a protective mechanism. Your mind believes that more thinking will eventually uncover a risk-free path, even though such a path does not exist.

The book then explores what actually drives this constant rumination. At its core, overthinking is fueled by fear and a desire to stay in control. You worry about failing, disappointing others, regretting your choice, or being judged as not enough. To protect you from these imagined outcomes, your mind runs scenarios, rehearses conversations, and searches for the perfect option that guarantees safety. This effort creates the illusion of control, but it also tightens your life into a narrow, anxious space. Nguyen invites readers to see overthinking not as an enemy, but as a misguided attempt at self-protection. Once you recognize that fear is running the show, you can begin shifting your attention from what might go wrong to what you actually want to create and how you want to feel. This change in focus starts loosening the grip of anxiety and opens the door to a more compassionate way of choosing.

Another major shift the book предлагает is redefining what a 'good' decision really means. Instead of chasing a single correct answer, Nguyen argues that decisions should be judged by alignment rather than by outcomes. There are no flawless choices, only options that either move you closer to the person you want to become or pull you further away. A meaningful decision supports long-term peace, growth, and integrity, even if it still feels uncomfortable or uncertain in the moment. He introduces the idea of an 'actualized' decision, one that comes from self-respect, presence, and love for your own life rather than fear, pressure, or the need for approval. This kind of choice may stretch you beyond old limits, but it also carries a quiet sense of rightness beneath the nerves.

To make this more practical, the book offers a simple inner compass built around four themes: peace, alignment, growth, and love. Instead of asking which option is safest or most impressive, you ask which one leaves you with deeper calm over time, which one reflects the values and identity you want to embody, which one helps you expand rather than shrink, and which one feels rooted more in curiosity and care than in fear and scarcity. Nguyen encourages readers to test these questions on real decisions and notice how the body often already knows the answer before the mind finishes arguing. This exercise helps reveal that clarity is not something you must manufacture through endless analysis, but something you can sense when you tune into your deeper priorities.

The book then turns inward, asking readers to study their own decision-making patterns without judgment. Everyone has habits around choices: some people rush into decisions and regret them later, while others stall until the moment passes. Some defer to others, and some freeze altogether. By observing what happens in your body and mind when a decision appears, you can begin to understand your personal style. Do you feel pressure to hurry, a tightness in your chest, or a desire to escape into distractions? Which decisions trigger the most spiraling, and what emotions show up most often? Nguyen also highlights the invisible rules many people carry, such as always choosing security, never upsetting family, or equating self-worth with success. Bringing these patterns into awareness creates the foundation for changing them.

From there, Nguyen invites readers to step into a new identity: someone who trusts their own decisions. This is not about becoming reckless or ignoring consequences, but about shifting from fear-driven reactions to conscious choice. The guiding question changes from 'What should I pick?' to 'Who do I want to be while I’m choosing?' He encourages remembering times when decisions felt clear and grounded, and noticing what was present then: a sense of inner truth, curiosity, or excitement rather than dread. Readers are asked to imagine how it would feel to choose without constant self-judgment and to define how they want to experience the decision-making process itself. This identity-level shift is paired with challenging old beliefs, such as the idea that your value depends on getting everything right or that you must always choose the safest option. By prioritizing growth over applause and inner peace over external approval, you begin rebuilding a more resilient form of self-trust.

To support this new mindset in real moments of anxiety, the book introduces a practical framework called TRUST. This step-by-step approach is designed for times when your mind is spinning and you cannot access clarity. It begins with pausing and breathing to calm your nervous system so you are not deciding from panic. Then you clearly name the actual decision you are facing, which reduces overwhelm by turning a vague cloud of worries into a single, concrete choice. Next, you uncover the fear underneath your hesitation and the cost of carrying that fear, including how it has already shaped your life. After that, you shift your focus from fear back to intuition and alignment, using the earlier principles of peace, growth, and love as your guide. Finally, you take the smallest possible action in the chosen direction, rather than trying to solve everything at once. This emphasis on tiny, manageable steps reinforces the idea that decisions are not final verdicts on your life, but experiments you can learn from and adjust.

Nguyen also stresses the importance of rebuilding trust through small, playful challenges rather than dramatic life overhauls. Big theories about self-trust only become real through daily practice. He suggests simple experiments like flipping a coin on a low-stakes choice and noticing which outcome you secretly hope for, ordering the first meal that genuinely appeals to you without scanning every option, or answering honestly when someone asks what you want instead of defaulting to 'whatever you like.' Another exercise is keeping small promises to yourself, such as going for a short walk or shutting down work at a certain time, and treating those moments as training grounds for bigger decisions. These acts gently teach your system that it is safe to act without perfect certainty and that your inner preferences are worth honoring.

Throughout the book, Nguyen returns to the idea that fear is not something to eliminate, but something to understand and move through. Courage does not mean feeling no anxiety, but choosing in alignment with your values even when anxiety is present. Over time, each small act of aligned decision-making chips away at the belief that you cannot trust yourself. The result is not a life free of uncertainty, but a life guided less by constant worry and more by a growing sense of inner steadiness.

In the end, "The Overthinker’s Guide to Making Decisions: How to Make Decisions Without Losing Your Mind" by Joseph Nguyen delivers a compassionate and practical message: you do not need perfect information or guaranteed outcomes to make meaningful choices. What you need is a clearer connection to who you want to be, an understanding of how fear shapes your habits, and a few simple tools to interrupt spirals when they arise. By redefining good decisions as aligned decisions, practicing small acts of self-trust, and shifting your identity from someone who waits for certainty to someone who moves with courage and care, you can transform everyday choices into opportunities for growth. The book ultimately reassures readers that clarity is not something you must earn through suffering, but something that emerges naturally when you learn to trust yourself and take gentle, intentional steps forward.

[Anthony Perez · Rating 5 out of 5]

Changed my perception on critical thinking

[Aagje Trompert · Rating 3 out of 5]

Veel open deuren. Moest er alleen even doorheen lopen

[Snezana Cook · Rating 1 out of 5]

It is obvious this book is largely written using AI, so much so I gave up reading it after a few chapters. I find it ethically and intellectually insulting to pass off such work as one’s own without full disclosure that it has been heavily assisted by AI. Besides which I abhor the generic AI tone so prevalent in many pieces of writing. It is a pity because I think the author may have a few useful ideas.

[Billy Claunch · Rating 5 out of 5]

Page 1 - 64 was great, the rest was an in-depth workbook of self-analysis about how and why you overthink, which I did not complete. So, I guess maybe I’m not an over-thinker overall? I’ll give that some thought. Seriously though the first 64 pages were fantastic and worth getting the book. I will likely read them again.

[Claudia · Rating 5 out of 5]

Acabo de cerrar este libro y siento que, por primera vez, mi mente finalmente se quedó en silencio. No es el típico libro de autoayuda con pasos lógicos y aburridos; Joseph Nguyen te habla como un amigo que te ve agotada de tanto pensar y te dice: "Ya puedes soltar eso, el problema no eres tú, es el ruido".
Lo que más me voló la cabeza es cómo Joseph desmenuza nuestra relación con el pensamiento. Él plantea una verdad que duele pero que libera: no sufrimos por nuestras circunstancias, sino por lo que pensamos sobre ellas. A través de sus páginas, vas entendiendo que la "parálisis por análisis" no se cura pensando más, sino aprendiendo a entrar en ese estado de "no-pensamiento" donde vive la intuición pura.
La narrativa del libro te lleva por un viaje de autodescubrimiento donde los "villanos" son esos miedos que disfrazamos de prudencia. Joseph explica que cuando intentamos tomar una decisión basados en el miedo al futuro o el arrepentimiento del pasado, siempre vamos a fallar, porque estamos decidiendo desde una ilusión. Me encantó cómo detalla que nuestras mejores decisiones —esas que cambian la vida— siempre aparecen cuando dejamos de forzar la respuesta y permitimos que la claridad llegue sola.
Un detalle que me marcó fue su explicación sobre la "sabiduría innata". Todos la tenemos, pero la tenemos enterrada bajo mil capas de "debería" y expectativas ajenas. Al final, el libro no trata de enseñarte a elegir entre la opción A o B, sino de enseñarte a confiar en que, elijas lo que elijas, tienes la capacidad de navegar cualquier resultado. Es una invitación a dejar de vivir en el "qué pasaría si" y empezar a vivir en el presente.
El cierre es una liberación total. Joseph te deja con la sensación de que ya no necesitas ser una experta en logística para vivir tu vida. Entendí que la paz mental no es el resultado de tomar la decisión correcta, sino la base necesaria para poder decidir. Me voy de este libro sintiéndome mucho más ligera, con menos listas de pros y contras y con mucha más confianza en mi propia voz.
Si sientes que tu cabeza es una radio que no se apaga nunca, por favor, lee a Joseph Nguyen. Es el manual de instrucciones para recuperar tu cordura que nadie nos dio al nacer. 💛

[Sam Grimm · Rating 4 out of 5]

A helpful, reassuring read for overthinkers. The concepts are easy to understand, and the exercises are practical and useful. It’s the kind of book I can easily refer back to when I start overthinking decisions.

[Lia · Rating 3 out of 5]

A quick and useful guide. Audiobook also has a podcast at the end with the author.

[Cecilia Lopez · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 ⭐️

las primeras 60 pgs están muuuy buenas, para mi gusto le hubieran agregado más de eso porque el resto es como un workbook y si no lo haces en el momento luego da hueva

[Darren Taylor · Rating 3 out of 5]

Picked this up at the airport as I'm a serial over thinker. Enjoyed reading the initial chapters - there are lots of memorable quotes, however, it does become very repetitive and over half the book is worksheets/exercises - probably didn't need to be that long, or expensive! It is a nice hardback book but 17 GBP was steep

[Sarah Ellen · Rating 2 out of 5]

I decided to dislike this book without overthinking it or losing my mind.

For those new to self help it might have value but there’s a lot of recycled material in it for the seasoned reader.

[Ashley · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5

[Will · Rating 2 out of 5]

Nguyen correctly points out that the root to overthinking is fear, and specifically the fear of what others think of us. I think his diagnosis is close to target. His prescription is less helpful. He slips when he asserts that the cost of trying to make everyone else happy is your own happiness. This may be fine, but he takes it down its logical course to do things that makes one happy and to trust one's own emotions and intuition. The framework he provides reinforces his conclusion. I don't think it is a reasonable one because it basically is a repackaging "follow your heart" and similar bad advice which leads down the road of narcissism and selfishness.

[Peter Wood · Rating 1 out of 5]

This has to rank as one of the most useless books I have ever attempted to read.
The usual waffle at the start of a self help book to pad it out.
But the real issue I have is that according to the author our heart and intuition always knows what to do - fear stops us.

My example of why I found this advice useless:
My workshop is a mess - for many reasons it could do with tidying. But I have many interests and each time I reconfigure it, it doesn’t work as I cannot predict what I will be doing next.
Now to many people they will say - it is obvious. Not to me. I try logic. That has limited success. I have no intuitive or emotional solution.
We are all different and for many people, this book’s advice clearly works.
My mistake was forgetting that there are rarely simple solutions.

[Meg Henderson · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was fluff for me. No substance, and contradicted itself within the same chapter at times. I wanted more from this book - it’s “worksheet” type formats for the second half or so.

The bits on intuition too were just not helpful for me anyway. It’s sort of embed in the book philosophy too, ‘you’ll know what the right decision is.’ I enjoyed the stoic elements and the idea that you should base decisions on the life you want to create for yourself.

[Gleb Berloff · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a genuinely life-changing book.
This had a decisive, and positive, impact on my wellbeing. I'm one of those people who indeed agonises over making decisions almost all of the time.
The foundational message of this book caused this agonising over making decisions to nosedive and has caused a significant reduction in my stress levels as a result. Additionally, the chapter on avoiding people pleasing and happiness was also life-changing.
Despite the low rating (which in my opinion is not justified), I can definitely say that so far, this is the self-help book that has had the biggest and most significant positive impact on my wellbeing.
The chapters are very brief, digestible, and easy to read, which is a bonus if you're stressed all the time!
Extremely highly recommended.

[g · Rating 3 out of 5]

The conversation at the end, if you’re listening to the audiobook, is proper lovely!

[roberta trevino · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lo ameee!!! Me ayudo mil me identifique en milll cosas que dice, quería highlight todoo literal

El unico pero que le pongo es que al final es mucho para journaling asi que lo termine haciendo en mi journal pero lo AME