Deeply Loved: Receiving and Reflecting God's Great Empathy for You

by Bill Gaultiere, Kristi Gaultiere

We all experience worry, hurts, triggers, and conflict, but we often suppress these emotions and keep God and others at a safe distance. Whether pressured by outside forces or compelled by an inner need for self-protection, the results are the same--our need for empathy gets stifled and we settle for shallow relationships with God, family, and friends.

In Deeply Loved, Bill and Kristi Gaultiere weave together engaging true stories with compelling insights from Scripture and modern psychology to help you
· grow in self-empathy and resist judging or rejecting your emotions
· learn how to release worries, comfort hurts, and overcome distress
· practice the Four A's of Empathy for yourself and others
· engage Bible-based empathy practices to know you are deeply loved by Jesus

Empathy is life-giving, transformative, and empowering. It relieves stress and renews energy. It strengthens your emotional health and raises your emotional intelligence. It enables you to resolve conflicts and develop close, loving relationships. And with the help of this book, it's closer than you think.

Genres: Spirituality, Christian

256 pages, Paperback

Published September 9, 2025

About the author

Bill and Kristi Gaultiere have been counseling and ministering to people for 30 years. They are authors of "Journey of the Soul," published by Revell in 2021.

Bill is a psychologist who has served in private practice, co-led a New Life psychiatric day hospital, and pastored churches. Kristi is a marriage and family therapist who has also served in private practice and church ministry. Together they are the founders of Soul Shepherding, a nonprofit ministry to help believers discover their next steps for growing in intimacy with Jesus, emotional health, and loving relationships. They live in Irvine, California.

Reviews

[Josh Cooper · Rating 5 out of 5]

I remember sitting in a room with a few other men a couple of years ago, talking with Bill about what he and Kristi’s next book should be. Empathy was mentioned more than once, and I'm so glad they wrote this book!

Bill and Kristi have taught me so much about empathy—especially what empathy is not. There are so many misunderstandings about empathy and they address them with wisdom, care, and experience. But this book doesn’t stop at explanation. It’s full of practical helps: empathy practices at the end of each chapter, assessments, breath prayers for releasing troubles and receiving God’s empathy, and “Soul Talk” questions for reflection or group discussion.

This book is a gift for anyone who wants to experience God’s empathy more deeply and share it more freely with others. Highly recommended! I’m so grateful for how empathy has changed and shaped me - particularly how I relate to those around me I most care about. Bonus: Deeply Loved arrived just in time for me to quote it in a sermon this week!

[J Graham · Rating 5 out of 5]

How did we miss the foundational role of empathy in a flourishing life? Authors Bill and Kristi Gaultiere go beyond defining healthy empathy, which coincides with truth and responsibility, to exploring why empathy is so vital in understanding ourselves more accurately, relating to others more compassionately and learning to lean on the God’s empathetic love for us in faith building and life transforming ways. At a time when the subject of empathy has come under scrutiny, this book provides a comprehensive, scripturally informed look at the topic, distinguishing empathy from unhealthy enabling and focusing instead on Christ’s modeling of empathy throughout His earthly life.

In reading the book, I found myself stopping to engage in several of the many exercises that the authors provide to deepen emotional intelligence as well as the tools for extending empathy to others and leaning into God’s empathy, which is often less tangible to us. Deeply Loved highlights soul care exercises that utilize empathy to identify and address our emotional wounds including emotional triggers, worry, hurt, anger and compassion fatigue.

I just finished reading this book and am looking forward to going through it again. It will no doubt become an invaluable resource for my own growth as well as for offering empathy to clients and loved ones. I highly recommend Deeply Loved to pastors, spiritual directors and anyone desiring to grow in emotional awareness, empathetic understanding and spiritual maturity.

[CFBC Library · Rating 3 out of 5]

I admit I’m at a bit of a disadvantage in reviewing “Deeply Loved.” The book appears to delve into a great deal of psychology/therapy which for me has always been hard to grasp. (I got a “D” in Psych 101 in college). I’m one of those who are perhaps over sensitive to empathy. I have a difficult time because I hold onto the other person’s suffering. While I was pleased to see a number of Biblical examples to support the authors’ approach to “receiving and reflecting” God’s empathy, I was at the same time thrown off by some of their methods of applying it. For example, at one point they recommended a woman go into the woods and scream as a way of making up for having failed to do that at someone in her past. I don’t understand how yelling at a tree would make up for a old wound in life. Also, they practice something they call “Calming Touch Prayer” where they gently stroke someones face while they pray for them. They wrote if you don’t have anyone to do that for you, you can just rub your own forehead. Hmm, that seems a tad odd. Those little added actions derailed what seemed like reasonable guidance offered prior to that. They made some practical, logical conclusions about empathy, even arguments against those who see empathy as a sin, that were grounded in Scripture. Though they believed everyone needs to receive empathy I didn’t notice where they explained how one gets that if no one gives it to you. So at best, with what for me was apparently muddled advice, I can only give the book 3 stars. Maybe I need to see a counselor, which, by the way, was something they repeatedly offered to those who answered mostly true to their evaluation quizzes. They would direct people to one of their “Soul Shepherding” advisors or one of their retreats. Also, students can earn a Certificate in Spiritual Direction from them. I assume they charge for it.

— reviewed by BH

[Erin Leigh Nelson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have had the honor of knowing Bill and Kristi Gaultiere for many years, and Bill has been a treasured mentor in my life. As a longtime follower of Soul Shepherding’s practices, their ministry is a constant source of strength for me.

Deeply Loved is a beautiful extension of what Bill and Kristi have been teaching and embodying for decades. This book comprises what truly transforms us: receiving the deep, unconditional love of Christ and then extending that love to others.

Kristi’s grace in receiving God’s empathy—and then sitting with others, holding them in that same sacred space—is deeply transformative. She demonstrates what it means to honor people and their stories with tender presence.

I believe this book offers the key to genuine thriving and transformation. When we allow ourselves to be deeply loved by Christ, we embody his love and can hold others with empathy as we honor the pain in their stories. This is the heart of healing ministry, and Bill and Kristi illuminate this path with wisdom and care.

I highly recommend Deeply Loved to anyone longing for deeper transformation, whether in their personal life or in their ministries and organizational leadership.

[Alisa Beyer · Rating 5 out of 5]

After 35 years of following Jesus and serving in ministry/soul care roles for 20 years, I still need help to grow!

The insights Bill and Kristi share in Deeply Loved on what empathy is and is not, as well as how empathy, responsibility and growth intersect are GOLD. They significantly grew my understanding of how to stay present and compassionate to other's pain without taking it on or carrying the weight of it. (Super helpful with my adult kids!)

Their breakdown of worry and anxiety helps me distinguish which I may be struggling more with, along with practical tools to move towards peace and freedom.

If you want to more fully know and experience Jesus love for you...
To know and love yourself and others with more kindness and courage...
And to live with more compassion, truth and joy-filled interdependence...
then Deeply Loved will be a beautiful word for you!

[Stephen Glasser · Rating 5 out of 5]

Deeply Loved is one of those books that doesn’t just inform—it invites transformation. Bill and Kristi Gaultiere have written something deeply practical and profoundly personal. Each chapter helped me slow down and become more aware of God’s loving presence in the midst of my everyday life.

I especially loved the Soul Talk reflections and Empathy Practices. They made it more than a book to read—it became a message to live. If you’re longing for a more honest, connected, and grace-filled walk with God and others, this book is a beautiful companion for the journey.

[Matt Davis · Rating 5 out of 5]

A books that heals, and prevents the hurt before it starts

I recently had the privilege of interviewing Bill and Kristi Gaultiere on our Life After Ministry podcast, and their book Deeply Loved has stayed with me ever since. What they’ve written isn’t just about recovery - it’s about prevention. So much pain in ministry and leadership comes from a lack of empathy, both given and received. This book offers a pathway to restore that empathy and to experience the kind of love from Jesus that heals the soul before it breaks.

[Steph · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’ve greatly anticipated this book after having gone to the Soul Shepherding Institute and experienced Bill and Kristi’s heart, empathy and teachings firsthand, and it does not disappoint! What a treasure trove of insights, tools, prayers, and much more. I’m so grateful for Bill and Kristi’s ministry and their desire for more and more people to know how deeply loved we are. Read the book, give it to your friends, go to one of their retreats, and be blessed!

[Amy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Deeply Loved is one of those books that felt like it was written right to me personally. Bill & Kristi share about God’s empathy in such a way that I could not only understand it, but actually experience it. The reflections and practices are simple yet powerful, helping me slow down and receive Jesus’ compassion in real and personal ways. It's 1000% a book that I will come back to again and again.

[John Loppnow · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book meets you in your pain and whispers, you are seen. Deeply Loved blends Scripture, story, and psychological insight in a way that holds tension and honors the mess. You encounter God’s empathy, not as an abstract ideal, but as a presence you can lean into. I trust it will become a trusted companion for many who long to know and reflect the depth of God’s love.

I wholeheartedly believe this book will help many others discover that they've been known, held, and deeply loved all along.

[Laura LaCross · Rating 5 out of 5]

Every resource I have from Bill and Kristi Gaultiere has informed and transformed my emotional and spiritual life in powerful ways. Deeply Loved is a welcomed addition for anyone seeking an ever growing walk with Jesus through understanding His compassionate love for you. It is practical and profound and draws the reader into the space every person holds, the need for empathy at every level of life.

[Tim Ahlman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Bill and Kristi Gaultiere have done it again! Deeply Loved combines deeply biblical theology with deeply rich psychology making for an action packed read for developing empathy for self and others. It is a wonderfully practical read for anyone seeking to deepen their understanding of God's love leading to greater self-awareness and service for neighbor and community.

[Douglas Jacoby · Rating 5 out of 5]

Deeply Loved is an extremely well-done, biblical, easy-to-read, and practical exploration of empathy. It's a masterful study of Christian empathy. Empathy is the "secret sauce" of the Gaultieres' ministry, permeating their spiritual direction, Christian coaching, and everything they do. I heartily recommend this work. — Douglas Jacoby, International Bible Teaching Ministry

[Gretchen Gibbs · Rating 5 out of 5]

We all need to be more empathetic in our interactions. This book is a wonderfully written guide on how we do that.

[Steve Harper · Rating 5 out of 5]

Bill and Kristi are gifted authors! Deeply Loved may be their life message as empathy and love flow from their ministry and their pens! I highly recommend their newest book!

[Chantel Stadler · Rating 4 out of 5]

A sweet companion for anyone needing to see the love, empathy, and boundaries of Jesus and reflect it in their own life.