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227 pages, Paperback
First published January 24, 2015









“I didn’t even know you were there. You couldn’t let me know I wasn’t alone. What if I had taken off my pants?”
Well, that would have been interesting… and I don’t necessarily mean that in a bad way. I can’t help my smirk as I chuckle softly to myself.
“You think that’s funny, huh?” He glares indignantly.
“I don’t know, maybe. You tell me. Would I laugh if I saw you naked?”
“I’m so fucking tired of running to stand still.”
“My family troubles, her dad’s role in my education, her amazing talent that I refuse to hinder—they all add up to one thing. I can’t be with her, at least not now. As much as I want to be the guy for her, I’m just not there yet. I know I’m a good guy, but I have dreams of becoming a better man. A man who takes care of his family… a man who takes care of her.
“If only I knew this beautiful boy would disappear from my life after this night, I would have said so many things…”
It’s entirely possible the truth could be more devastating than my worst fears, but at least I can deal with it and move forward. The smallest possibility of West is like a faint whisper I just can’t silence.
“I know Alex too well. She’ll never give up on me if I give her even the slightest inkling there’s a chance for us, and I won’t be her burden.”
I smile because every ache, every bit of longing, every stinging word I’ve endured— it’s all worth it.


I'm not trying to fix you, West. I want you to see that I love you, even though you're broken.
I can't imagine a world without you in it. No matter where I am, I'll always dream of you.




“You are everything that is pure and perfect to me in this world. You are my sassy, sweet, intelligent, beautiful, stubborn poppy girl.”
“When you look at me, I want you to see in me what I see in you. I keep trying to find the right path. I’m on my way to becoming who I want to be, who I need to be for us to work. I need you to give me that time.”
“I hate that even though you’ve crushed me, I still can’t wish you away. You still own me, and I hate that most of all.”

“I’m just not there yet. I know I’m a good guy, but I have dreams of becoming a better man. A man who takes care of his family … a man who takes care of her.
“Tell me something, West. Tell me something I don’t know.” He runs a thumb over my swollen lips while he studies me. I’ve never felt more loved, more worshipped.
“I can’t imagine a world without you in it. No matter where I am, I’ll always dream of you. It’ll have to be enough.”
Her lyrical laugh … her unruly blond waves … her dancing cerulean eyes. They all mean one thing to me. Pure. Fucking. Perfection.
“Your presence has always been like a balm to my soul, and when it was gone, it served as a reminder of how far I’d fallen into the darkness. Because make no mistake, Alex, you are my light.”