If you don´t have the time and the nerves to read this book - which is a wise decision – here is the short version in form of Masons secret diary:
Dear diary, I could tell you very exciting details about my fight for survival in the desert – but I won´t. Only this: I hunted a vulture! Yes, I´m that cool!
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Dear diary, I found the ancient ruins I was looking for! But there is a storm coming up...
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Dear diary, the storm send me back in time. Everyone speaks a dead language no one knows anymore but I speak it fluently. Yes, I´m that cool!
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Dear diary, I met a strange woman who stripped naked, so I had to make out with her. She attacked me afterwards. Doesn´t matter, got some.
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Dear diary, this city is ruled by a strange dude from the future. He punished a girl by stripping her naked and torturing her to death. I tried to make out with her (since she was naked) but I couldn´t reach her before she was dead. Dammit!
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Dear diary, I freed the former ruler of this city, Alasa. Naturally, she got stripped naked and in mortal danger soon after, so I had to save her and make out with her. Twice.
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Dear diary, we traveled through time and to the future to kill the bad guy. Alasa got caught by strange plant-creatures, was stripped naked and tortured. At least I could watch.
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Dear diary, they brainwashed Alasa so she nude-attacked me. I thought about making out with her but it was kind of difficult. So I waited for her to normalize.
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Dear diary, ZOMBIES AND GIANT ANTS!! Thinking about Alasa only wearing a cape. She was naked under it. Don´t know what else happened.
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Dear diary, we went to the past again and there was a cult. They stripped Alasa naked and put her in danger. I had to make out with another naked girl first before I could save her and make out with her. Business.
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Dear diary, back to the future! We met a strange chinese man. Fortunately, I can speak chinese fluently. Yes, I´m that cool!
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Dear diary, we got caught again and the strange woman from the beginning stripped naked and I made out with her. Then I realised that she was a leopard once and got somehow transformed into a human. I got me some furry action!!Yes, I´m that cool!
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Dear diary, Alasa got stripped naked and tortured again. I´m starting to enjoy this shit.
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Dear diary, I am the smartest badass on earth! I killed the bad guy in no-time (wink) AND made out with 3 out of 4 females I met in the meantime. I could have made out with the last one as well, if she would have survived a minute longer. Amateur.
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Not worth any time.