Love by Deception: A Harrowing True Story of Domestic Abuse & Betrayal.

by K.C. Barnard

Meet K.C. a gregarious, fun loving woman in her thirties. With an abundance of friends, and an enviable position as a jet-setting stewardess in the prestigious world of private aviation, she seems to have it all....but does she?

Love by Deception is a compelling read of how meeting the wrong person can bring not only heartache, but real devastation in the most brutal of ways. We follow K.C.’s turmoil, as we unravel her disastrous relationships where she becomes the unwitting victim to four extremely cruel men.

Throughout K.C.’s journey she is determined to never allow anyone to break her spirit.

Genres: Drama

339 pages, Kindle Edition

First published June 6, 2014

Reviews

[Jennifer · Rating 2 out of 5]

Love By Deception could have been an amazing book, but unfortunately the writing is just not that good and the story not fleshed out enough. Instead of feeling for the main character I just kept thinking how is this thirty something world traveler so naive? Why does she stay with these guys when she knows they are not good? Why does she keep suppressing her intuition and not listening to anyone else? It just...I wish the author would have went into more details on the little things and what life was like before everything went crazy with Devil Man especially. He seemed genuinely crazy, and I understand the whole cycle of violence and such, how abusers get their victims to stay with them and whatnot, but Devil Man didn't seem to fit into this exactly. It was so quick and seemed relatively easy to get out. I just didn't understand.

Really I think that was the issue with most of the book for me. Everything seemed to be too quickly explained so I didn't really get why she would stay or go back with these guys. It didn't make any sense based on what I was told and she didn't seem like the normal beaten down victim who stays because they are terrified or anything. I wish this would have been more in depth so I would have understood. Instead I kept thinking why is this girl so naive and gullible? You believe someone just because they had said before that they are honest? Even when everything is telling you not to believe them? Okay. The author does say throughout the book that she knew something was wrong but time and time again ignored that voice that told here something was off. Without seeing why she would stay with these men I didn't understand why she would ignore all the red flags that she said she did notice. And it just kept happening. Really it seems like this cycle of being with a terrible guy will just keep continuing. She said after Devil Man she didn't really feel broken or need to talk to someone about what happened, she talked to her friends and that was good enough. She was fine pretty quick and no big deal, or that is the way it came across in the book. I can't help but think if she was in this really terribly abusive relationship where she was beaten down mentally and feared for her life would she really just be okay that easily? She also was really lucky that Devil Man never tried to find her again once it was over for good. A lot women are not so lucky and they live in fear that their abuser will find them and kill them.

So the author is stuck in this horrible pattern of picking terrible men then staying with them just because. I know it is probably more than that, she is probably worn down by these men little by little like most abusers, but through the writing and what I was told in this story I just didn't see it. I just saw a gullible lady making poor decisions and excuses for bad behavior in her partner. If I didn't know more about domestic abuse this book unfortunately would not have opened my eyes. This book would have made me even more confused as to why a woman would stay with a man like this. It makes it seem like women in abused relationships are just kind of stupid, which is not the case. So I was very disappointed in this book. Instead of highlighting and showing how truly horrible it is to be in a situation like this and how hard it is to get out (especially Devil Man and Floppy) it just made me confused as to why anyone would stay. She kept saying she doesn't know, and hindsight is everything and whatever, but she just seemed stupid. It all starts with Tomcat and his weird marriage arrangement. Why did she just believe him and never look into that? So right from the beginning in terms of relationships shown in this book she makes poor decision after poor decision (and once she makes a decision she sticks with it even if her intuition tells her it is the wrong choice).

I hope the author has actually learned from all of these relationships and has better ones going forward, but I don't think that will actually happen. I wouldn't be surprised to find out she keeps dating the wrong men again and again. Who knows though. Maybe this book did help her see some truths and she will find a nice guy and settle down (or stay single and be happy that way). I do wish nothing but the best for her and hope she can make better decision in the future.

This review was originally posted to Jen in Bookland

[Alan · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great read

I took this book on holiday and couldn't put it down. Unbelievable story and I wish the author all the best for the future.

[Monica Ganz · Rating 5 out of 5]

It is not very often that I am so captivated by a book that I want to do nothing but turn page after page desiring to know what is going to happen next. Love by Deception did exactly that with this very well put together true story. From the beginning to end every page is filled with adventure, suspense, pain, as well as encouragement. It really hit me hard to read this because while I did not have the same experience I could somehow relate to it as a young girl. You could tell that the author poured out their heart in this book as the writing will keep you intrigued as you read.

[Dingleberry · Rating 3 out of 5]

Loved the author's breezy voice. It was like a chat with a friend. The true-confession style was captivating. Yes, it has typos and grammatical errors - the narrator even apologizes for them at the beginning - but the book's overarching lesson on abuse in seemingly glamorous and normal relationships is a good one, with reasonable arguments, personalization (she expresses the feeling of being trapped in a relationship very well in several places) and, if you're in the UK, even some practical help.

Does have some graphic sexual content, and quite a lot of violence. Fair warning.

[Todd Kinsey · Rating 4 out of 5]

Something tells me there is a lot of the author in these pages. If so she's had some harrowing experiences with some men that give us all a bad name.

Love by deception is an excellent first novel that deserves an audience. I hope that K.C. Barnard's book gets in front of the right people because its pages carry an important message.

[Carol Sokol · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hard to imagine

Difficult to understand the author repeating the same pattern with men. So sorry her trust was violated by these narcissistic evil slugs. I pray she has learned enough not to repeat these destructive patterns with men anymore. Good luck.

[Cecilia · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a powerful book! A good message to women who are being abused verbally, mentally and sexually every single day.

[Gloria J. Wood · Rating 2 out of 5]

Your title should have been, "Love by a Really Stupid Women".

This women had a really low opinion of her self & seemed only having a baby after she wasted her younger years flying around the world. She continued to attract the wrong men after Mr Happy. What the hell was wrong with this women, why did she lay down & let them walk all over her.? She let them insult her, use her, take money from her, again & again. Did she have a brain or was she really desperate for a man, any man. She gives a bad name to women & I wanted to slap her up the side of the head! How could anyone holding such a responsible job be so stupid? I hope she made lots of money on this ridicules book to pay for the doctors fee. I dated after my husband died & no man was going to use me or ask for money or lay a hand on me & they knew it. Don't get man, get even! Use your brain....make life very unhappy for them. If she did a little investigating it would have saved her a lot of pain...never take a man at their word, most are liers, especially older men, what's it take to do a little checking.......its your life!

[Sandra · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was not a book for me. It may have been a true story but I found it unbelievable that a person who was in a good job, had established herself in her career, and was able to travel the world as part of her job would allow herself to be so violently abused both physically and verbally not once, not twice, not three times but four times with situations getting progressively worse. I know terrible abuse happens in the world, but generally it continues because the woman doesn't have a way out, e.g. she has no job, no money, no way to care for her children, etc., but this story didn't have any of those drawbacks which might have made it more believable to me. I hope that if all this did happen, while writing the story the author was able to see a way to prevent getting herself into future situations as portrayed in this story.

[Elizabeth Maher · Rating 5 out of 5]

One woman's journey of freeing herself from domestic abuse.

This is a must read book especially for young woman who are going out on their own for the first time. It could save lives. This is a systematic abuse of one person toward another that can and will often lead to death or severe injury and trauma. Very frank and brave of the author to write her personal experiences. A thousand blessings for writing this book and baring your soul. Great book for everyone to read and learn how to make our publisher personal relationships work flourish.

[Donna · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thought Provoking True Life

I just finished reading this very thought provoking, sometimes painful true story. Wow! It is so easy to rush to judgement when you are on the outside looking in. I applaud this author for telling the tale. It is so hard to admit you are or have been a party to domestic violence. Sadly even in 2016 many people don't realize how prevalent and devastating this type of abuse is. I would seriously call this mandatory reading for girls getting ready to date.

[Doris · Rating 2 out of 5]

A simple proof read by a friend would have been of great benefit to this heartfelt venting in book form. I hope Ms. Barnard by now has learned it's okay to take care of yourself, to not be "liked" by everyone nor accepting of whatever is handed to her.

I identified with her in many places in this, her memoir of sorts. And it took me sixty years to learn what K.C. Barnard needs to know. I wish her well. I wish her freedom.

[Anahi · Rating 4 out of 5]

WOWZA. At first this book was a slow start for my liking but the more I read, the more interested I became in hearing the narrarator's story. There were many times that I was yelling at her warning her about all the red flags, but I completely understand her point of view. This story is a great one that shows you that life is not simply just falling in love and living happily ever after. I commend the author for exposing her life and sharing her stories with the world.

[Marcia Brineman · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting

The book was readable and probably helpful to many women; just not me. Very depressing to think that there are so many damaged men in the world. I raised son's and feel that boys/men are far more fragile than most women. Mother's, take your jobs seriously. We need to raise compassionate son's. Once damaged, they seem to not recover.

[Roni Delligatti · Rating 4 out of 5]

The story of a survivor

As a survivor I can relate. Her stories were definitely more dramatic than mine. The story is written from a United Kingdom voice so some of the terms were unfamiliar but it didn't diminish the story. Thank you K for being brave enough to leave and courageous enough to write your story.

[cindy strader · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book great author

This book kept my attention. I wanted to see how the author ended up. This is a good book for anyone in a one sided relationship. The author makes a painful topic humorous in a good way.

[sally · Rating 5 out of 5]

Must read for not only younger women but all women

This was a very well written personal account of abuse in all forms. Very eye opening for some and tearful for those that have lived thru the same. Thank you for having the courage to do this!!

[Maria Mercedes · Rating 4 out of 5]

true story about domestic violence and how people living it don't always realize they are in the situation. how it it justified or minimized in their minds so it is not until after they get out that they are able to acknowledge the abuse.

[martiene · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love

Thank you for writing such a Frank and honest book informing women to not be afraid to seek out only true love...follow your heart..and have a spine

[Carol B. Robinson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Intriguing and informative

Hard to put down. This should be required reading for all young adults thinking about entering into relationships of a sexual nature.

[Leigh Roberts · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great read!

It was a true story that shows how you can gather your courage and have a happy life. Easy to read, it was hard to put down.

[Deb · Rating 3 out of 5]

Rather sad that one woman could have been involved with so many scoundrels! I felt sorry for her, in many ways. But mainly -- why didn't she ever learn!

[April · Rating 5 out of 5]

Worth the read

Very interesting. Definitely an eye opener for anyone who may have or is possibly in any of these situations. Highly recommend this book.

[Frank Cardenas · Rating 1 out of 5]

I chose this book by the cover and after reading the first pages, I found myself in a soap opera kind of tale; I don’t know whether it was the simple writing or the monotonous situation but I was asking myself how someone can repeat the same patterns and still not react; it felt as if the author wanted to take part in a violence case study and experience these abusive situations; the signs were there all the time, the experience was her own and it didn’t seem as if she was so much in love with all of them so that she couldn’t stop the predators! I guess one wonders about her past life, was she trying to find a new father? Or her self-esteem was that low? Good thing is I managed to finish the book.

[Joyce Ellis · Rating 2 out of 5]

Hmmm. Where to begin. This book is supposed to be a factual account of this womans horrendous relationship history. Fact or fiction? So much of it just doesnt ring true. Can you actually remember, word for word, arguments you have had with previous partners? I certainly cant. I can believe everyone can make a mistake when judging someones personality, but to make mistake afte mistake. FOUR times? She really has to ask herself if she maybe needs some sort of therapy?
I skim ready after 75% as the book just became very repetitive and irritating.

[Julianne Adams · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book!

This book is a must read for any woman who thinks she may be involved with a domestic abuser. As a woman who grew up in an abusive home, I find myself reading this type of book trying to understand my mother's obsession with her abuser and consequently, mine. Well worth the read.

[pauline goulding · Rating 5 out of 5]

A year jerker.

Good grief I did not realise that this is is still happening, in this day and age.I would not have stopped in this relationship.l know it is easy for me to say that because I am happy marriage,we have our, riffs but it soon clears the air I feel sorry for the poor woman. I hope she feels like she can move on to a happier life.

[Monica Sarff · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sad story

I applaud the author for baring her soul and life to the reader. Having the savior complex is never easy. My picker was also broken and after 4 failed marriages I have happily spent the last 20 years single.

[Kristine · Rating 4 out of 5]

It took me a while

I took me a while to read this book, mostly because it touched on some of my own mistakes I have made over the years in relationships. I enjoyed the book and it made me think

[Cecilia Grech · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a powerful book! A good message to women who are being abused verbally, mentally and sexually every single day.