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Split or Swallow #2
Between Two Kings
From internet sensation and Amazon bestseller Lindsay Straube comes the second book in the sexy, biting Split or Swallow series, featuring dangerous basilisks, competitive seduction, and a love triangle that could destroy kingdoms.
512 pages, Kindle Edition
First published November 11, 2025
23227 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 2,306 reviews
November 17, 2025
EDIT ***Came back to give this book one star because I heard the author claimed that anyone that doesn’t like Tem has internalized misogyny. Tem is easily the worst female man character I’ve ever read… she’s written as selfish and insecure while still wanting everyone around her to be in love with her, even when it hurts them. Her personality changes based on the narrative. It’s not internalized misogyny… it’s a shitty character.
Original review:
I am choosing to believe this book does not exist and the series ended with book 1.
I almost gave this book three stars, but even being objective, I have to take one away for the ending. I’m so mad…. and I think a lot of readers will be too… so please know what you’re getting into. When I finished, my first thought was: WTF!!!!!!! was the point?!? I choose to believe the ending of Kiss of the Basilisk was the real end of this series. I am raging. Also, Tem remains utterly insufferable and immature.
The things that were funny and shocking in the first book don’t land the same way here. Every page tries so hard to be outrageous that it loses all impact. What once felt clever now just feels numbing.
Edit: came back to my review because I’m so annoyed by the lack of character and relationship development to justify the ending. It was bad writing. Ugh I’m still angry
Trigger warnings: human centipede, the fountain, a tournament
Original review:
I am choosing to believe this book does not exist and the series ended with book 1.
I almost gave this book three stars, but even being objective, I have to take one away for the ending. I’m so mad…. and I think a lot of readers will be too… so please know what you’re getting into. When I finished, my first thought was: WTF!!!!!!! was the point?!? I choose to believe the ending of Kiss of the Basilisk was the real end of this series. I am raging. Also, Tem remains utterly insufferable and immature.
The things that were funny and shocking in the first book don’t land the same way here. Every page tries so hard to be outrageous that it loses all impact. What once felt clever now just feels numbing.
Edit: came back to my review because I’m so annoyed by the lack of character and relationship development to justify the ending. It was bad writing. Ugh I’m still angry
Trigger warnings: human centipede, the fountain, a tournament
November 21, 2025
Hate review because that's all it deserves
This book wins the title for being the worst written book. Like what was the purpose of this? I don't get it. The first one was trashy but entertaining. This one was just... Trash. Such a waste of time and money.
Character development? Non existent.
Plot? Never was there.
Good smut? No, but let's make everything creepy and weird so the readers feel nothing but disgust.
Brainless FMC? Yes x1000
Spineless MMCs? Yes x200
Tem was never a smart character. I don't know why the author insists she's this intelligent, independent and fierce woman who's a goddess. She's not. She's a pick me dumbass who can't make decisions on her own. Relies on other men to get things done. But God forbid if someone doesn't like her, she'll whine about it until your ears bleed. The worst fmc I've ever read.
Caspen? You mean to tell me, the guy who was head over heels. So possessively in love with her just let her be?? This is the same guy who was jealous of other basilisks looking her way? But now is fine with her having sex with anyone and everyone. His character assassination just makes me beyond pissed.
Leo? Was he even there? I mean, all I saw was a scared little boy who couldn't put his foot down while his betrothed stole from him. Peachy. What a nice king.
There is no romance. There's plenty of weird disgusting smut though. Lots of double standards- "Oh Caspen I don't want you to sleep with anyone. But I will sleep with all. Because such is the basilisk way." END ME. The author has this weird style of writing that she throws some new weird smut idea when she doesn't know what to do. The excuse every time is- "Oh it's the basilisk way." Just say that you don't know what to do ffs. It was simply lazy writing.
The ending was utter trash. I'm not even going to pretend like I liked anything about it except for the part when I get to close the damn book and throw it across the room. Fuck no, I'm never coming back to this series.
~•~•~
Ngl I'm just here for the smut. I don't even care about the non existent plot...
This book wins the title for being the worst written book. Like what was the purpose of this? I don't get it. The first one was trashy but entertaining. This one was just... Trash. Such a waste of time and money.
Character development? Non existent.
Plot? Never was there.
Good smut? No, but let's make everything creepy and weird so the readers feel nothing but disgust.
Brainless FMC? Yes x1000
Spineless MMCs? Yes x200
Tem was never a smart character. I don't know why the author insists she's this intelligent, independent and fierce woman who's a goddess. She's not. She's a pick me dumbass who can't make decisions on her own. Relies on other men to get things done. But God forbid if someone doesn't like her, she'll whine about it until your ears bleed. The worst fmc I've ever read.
Caspen? You mean to tell me, the guy who was head over heels. So possessively in love with her just let her be?? This is the same guy who was jealous of other basilisks looking her way? But now is fine with her having sex with anyone and everyone. His character assassination just makes me beyond pissed.
Leo? Was he even there? I mean, all I saw was a scared little boy who couldn't put his foot down while his betrothed stole from him. Peachy. What a nice king.
There is no romance. There's plenty of weird disgusting smut though. Lots of double standards- "Oh Caspen I don't want you to sleep with anyone. But I will sleep with all. Because such is the basilisk way." END ME. The author has this weird style of writing that she throws some new weird smut idea when she doesn't know what to do. The excuse every time is- "Oh it's the basilisk way." Just say that you don't know what to do ffs. It was simply lazy writing.
The ending was utter trash. I'm not even going to pretend like I liked anything about it except for the part when I get to close the damn book and throw it across the room. Fuck no, I'm never coming back to this series.
~•~•~
Ngl I'm just here for the smut. I don't even care about the non existent plot...
November 18, 2025
DON’T TALK TO ME EVER AGAIN !
THIS BOOK DOESN’T EXIST TO ME AND I WISH I COULD HAVE A AMNESIA EPISODE AND FORGET THIS BOOK ONLY😡😡😡😡😡😡😡
For a book to be titled “Between two Kings” there was literally no between there ! I was expecting a throuple situation and not THAT 😔
I AM ABOUT TO SPOIL THE SHIT OUT OF THIS BOOK SO IF YOU DON’T WANT TO KNOW PLEASE DON’T READ IT ! I don’t want to press the spoil button because my evil side want people to know exactly how I feel now 👿
What in the actual fuck happened here ? We went from a very interesting plot and amazing smut to lazy writing, uncreative plot, disgusting smut and LITTLE WHINY BITCH CHARACTERS ….. and yes I mean characters because Tem was INSUFFERABLE and whiny here and Leo went from interesting in the first book to downright weak, pathetic and whiny too.
CASPEN character was assassinate because he went from the powerful serpent king to this secretive and stupid character.
What was the point of Evelyn ? FUCK HER AND LEO! How was Leo with her? How was he allowing her to spend so much money when the kingdom was in crises? Why was he SO spineless, where was his backbone? How he didn’t think about selling the gold? How he ALLOWED Tem to bleed to make money for him if he supposedly loves her? How didn’t he find another solution? I HAVE SO MANY COMPLAINTS ABOUT LEO!!!!! I hate his whiny fucking little ass ! Fuck HIM !
Tem wanted every man to love, desire and be loyal to her without offering the same in return. The way she never communicated with Caspen. The miscommunication in this book is downright an abomination. I hate her fucking ass too.
And the worst thing that an author can do in my opinion it’s to do what she did to Caspen……. I understand killing a main character in certain situations. If you do like Liv Zander did in Shadows so Cruel, you even think it’s beautiful because she gave such importance and love to the character and made his death a salvation. HERE SHE LITERALLY started to assassinate Caspen’s character by trying to make us hate him to then FUCKING KILL HIM IN THE END ?????!!!!!!! FUCK THIS BOOK ! I fucking hated and I am almost running out of words to describe just how much !!!!!
Solving a love triangle by killing one of them it’s lazy and a stupid way to make readers hate the book.
Also why there was no conclusion and showing us Gabriel, Adeline and Apollo ? FUCK THIS TOO !
I wish I could unread this book ……. I am so angry. I kinda felt the same way I felt in Exodus by Kate S. spoiler alert I also hated that book….
I am upset because this book was on my list of the 10 before the end and it started badly.
THIS BOOK DOESN’T EXIST TO ME AND I WISH I COULD HAVE A AMNESIA EPISODE AND FORGET THIS BOOK ONLY😡😡😡😡😡😡😡
For a book to be titled “Between two Kings” there was literally no between there ! I was expecting a throuple situation and not THAT 😔
I AM ABOUT TO SPOIL THE SHIT OUT OF THIS BOOK SO IF YOU DON’T WANT TO KNOW PLEASE DON’T READ IT ! I don’t want to press the spoil button because my evil side want people to know exactly how I feel now 👿
What in the actual fuck happened here ? We went from a very interesting plot and amazing smut to lazy writing, uncreative plot, disgusting smut and LITTLE WHINY BITCH CHARACTERS ….. and yes I mean characters because Tem was INSUFFERABLE and whiny here and Leo went from interesting in the first book to downright weak, pathetic and whiny too.
CASPEN character was assassinate because he went from the powerful serpent king to this secretive and stupid character.
What was the point of Evelyn ? FUCK HER AND LEO! How was Leo with her? How was he allowing her to spend so much money when the kingdom was in crises? Why was he SO spineless, where was his backbone? How he didn’t think about selling the gold? How he ALLOWED Tem to bleed to make money for him if he supposedly loves her? How didn’t he find another solution? I HAVE SO MANY COMPLAINTS ABOUT LEO!!!!! I hate his whiny fucking little ass ! Fuck HIM !
Tem wanted every man to love, desire and be loyal to her without offering the same in return. The way she never communicated with Caspen. The miscommunication in this book is downright an abomination. I hate her fucking ass too.
And the worst thing that an author can do in my opinion it’s to do what she did to Caspen……. I understand killing a main character in certain situations. If you do like Liv Zander did in Shadows so Cruel, you even think it’s beautiful because she gave such importance and love to the character and made his death a salvation. HERE SHE LITERALLY started to assassinate Caspen’s character by trying to make us hate him to then FUCKING KILL HIM IN THE END ?????!!!!!!! FUCK THIS BOOK ! I fucking hated and I am almost running out of words to describe just how much !!!!!
Solving a love triangle by killing one of them it’s lazy and a stupid way to make readers hate the book.
Also why there was no conclusion and showing us Gabriel, Adeline and Apollo ? FUCK THIS TOO !
I wish I could unread this book ……. I am so angry. I kinda felt the same way I felt in Exodus by Kate S. spoiler alert I also hated that book….
I am upset because this book was on my list of the 10 before the end and it started badly.
November 11, 2025
1⭐️
How I Went From Being A Lindsay Straube Superfan To, Well, A Hater
For a multitude of reasons I will discuss in this dissertation, Between Two Kings is undoubtedly my least favorite book of all time. This review is incredibly spoiler heavy and is for those that have already read, or do not plan to read, this book. It will spoil the entire ending and most of the plot throughout. You’ve been warned!
I was a huge Split or Swallow fan and practically made it my personality. Being a part of the chapter drops before it was traditionally published as Kiss of the Basilisk was a crazy cool experience. I went to meet the author, bought merch, and talked about it constantly. This is not a biased review and has nothing to do with the fact that this book is 80% (or more) smut. I am not a hater of the genre, I am a hater of this book specifically.
I’m breaking down my issues with Between Two Kings into bullet points, as I have so much to say. This is where I’d like to add that I don’t often write negative reviews and please do not come for me about this one. We don’t all have to agree and I’m a sensitive gal. If you think I’ve said the wrong thing or written too much, you can leave anytime. I don’t want to argue, I’ve just been waiting a month to discuss and, well, the time kept giving me more and more to say. Let’s get started.
-Leo is a fuckboy. We all thought it in the first book, but I was willing to give him a chance. He’s a broody cutie and I imagined he would redeem himself throughout this second installation. But, NO. He was much worse. Simply put, he allowed Tem to bleed for his
-I considered including this in my first point, but it is certainly more of a plot issue than a Leo issue, specifically. How in the world did the entire economy of this kingdom collapse in a matter of weeks? Was there no reserve, no other singular source of income, no outside allies, no goods to sell or trade? To imagine an entire kingdom completely running out of coin in the span of time this book takes place, is unfathomable. Had Leo ever even heard of an economy prior to this event? Did he have no advisors? Did the King, while a bit of a cunt himself, teach him nothing? I don’t get it.
-Where was the ending? The conclusion of this book including Caspen’s death, Tem’s mourning and loss of her entire basilisk side (see next bullet point), and their reunion was less than 10% of the book itself. To solve a love triangle through a death is one thing, but what about the rest of the book? For example:
What happened to Vera after the weasel incident? What about Rowe?
What happens to Adeline? Gabriel? These are characters we grew to know and love, and we are left with literally no answers.
What happens with Apollo?!?!? Yes, he was a good fuck, but that’s not all he was. The reader is now emotionally invested in his life and in his happiness. He lost his brother and also lost the woman he pretty immediately fell in love with. He sacrificed so much and we don’t get a glimpse of a happy ending, or any real ending, for him.
Hand in hand with that same point, what about the entire basilisk kingdom? Why tell us about the internal turmoil between the quivers to not resolve it at all?
-Temperance had to give up an integral part of who she was, one she was embracing and proclaiming, because (again) of a rule made in this book. To rip, not only her husband, but her self away and then wrap it up in a bow is just poor writing. The ending of this book minimized her mourning, took away her identity, and painted her happy. To take Temperance - beloved, insufferable Tem - and transform her from scared and easily overwhelmed to a confident sex goddess, a fucking QUEEN, and then force her to lose her entire basilisk side is irredeemable.
-Taking us back to the huge plot twist, Caspen’s death: A friend put it in the exact perfect words: “Is she trolling her fans?” and I have such a hard time feeling like she’s not. To make Caspen’s death a necessary result of the thrall when the rules for said thrall were introduced in this same book, feels completely unnecessary. It literally did not have to happen. Everything that led to Caspen’s death was entirely preventable by the author and a product of the narrative only within this book. While the concept of the thrall was introduced in KOTB, the rules attached to it were introduced only in this book. It felt like every moment of Between Two Kings was designed to make me hate Caspen, so I should’ve seen his death coming. But to villainize an otherwise beloved character for no reason just to make their death more palatable doesn’t feel like a real plot to me. It feels like shock value, which there was already plenty of in the fountain.
-I will say that I had a good time with the smut, although it didn’t aid my rating at all. The 69 human centipede? The fountain? The cumming contest? Diabolical af. I mean, I drew a diagram for that ouroboros fucking situation. So. Much. Scooching.
I understand this is Tem’s book but it doesn’t make sense to say that only her ending mattered. There are so many similarities to the Ravenhood series (which I also didn’t love), but those characters were at least given endings. Sure, the death of a main character can be allowed, sure, but only in the instance that there is a conclusion.
This book left me in a huge slump but also with the question ‘what defines the romance genre?’ Is this a happily ever after? Can it possibly be if we don’t ever see Temperance and Leo happy? I love that the smut is so much of the plot, it’s Lindsay Straube, but to pretend like the emotional impact wouldn’t be significant to the reader or to Tem minimizes the entire first book and, essentially, the entire romance genre. As an audience, we watched Caspen grow. We also watched him turn into a little bitch baby in this book, yes, but the conclusion of his story was terrible.
And ultimately, if this were ‘Temperance’s story,’ she would’ve been given a choice. And she didn’t choose. Her decision was thrust upon her. To expand on what I said above, ‘solving’ a love triangle by killing a main character is not the same as choosing, unless the choice was: pick who dies and enjoy the other.
In conclusion, I have no idea how this book made it past the editing phase. I’m shocked people are enjoying it and I won’t read another Straube novel. I especially wouldn’t pick up the prequel, which is about Tem’s parents, because why would I? Between Two Kings gave us absolutely no reason to be invested in their story, as they spent next to no time on the page. We saw Tem’s wet rag mom for all of 47 seconds and her dad gave some of the most obvious advice of all time for maybe double that. I don’t know anything about them, they weren’t written to be intriguing, and for the prequel to literally revolve around them? I couldn’t be less invested.
Thank you for reading. This was a fuck ass book and I will be sitting in the disappointment of it for a long time. Absolutely irredeemable.
If this review didn’t make you feel livid and you’d like to see more from me (including an upcoming post about what defines the romance genre, feel free to follow me here:
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This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
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November 12, 2025Tem’s pelvis: Marked Safe ✅
Kiss of the Basilisk was so deliciously unhinged and somehow Between Two Kings turned the heat up even more. I didn’t think Lindsay could one up herself, but OH BOY DID SHE. Get ready to laugh, cry, gnaw your arm off because of how hot everyone is…you know, the average reading experience.
I’m keeping this short because I want to leave you all in as much suspense as possible but just know there is a SEX TOURNAMENT, a NEW HOTTIE (Apollo??? It’s me, Shannon. I promise my husband won’t mind!!!), letter writing, feet kicking banter, angst, and so! much! sex! There’s more Gabriel, huge character growth for Tem, and an under current of feminine power which just hits in today’s world.
THERES ALSO A FKIN’ GROTTO SCENE 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️ I fear I’ll be thinking about the grotto scene until I’m on my deathbed. MY DEATHBED I TELL YOU.
I had the distinct honor of being the first person to read Kiss of the Basilisk from beginning to end and am maintaining that honor with Between Two Kings (yes I will brag about it until the end of time thanks). To know Lindsay is to love her and simultaneously be afraid of her brain and the things she comes up with.
November 11 will be here before we know it but just know…I’ll always be #TeamLeo 👑
Kiss of the Basilisk was so deliciously unhinged and somehow Between Two Kings turned the heat up even more. I didn’t think Lindsay could one up herself, but OH BOY DID SHE. Get ready to laugh, cry, gnaw your arm off because of how hot everyone is…you know, the average reading experience.
I’m keeping this short because I want to leave you all in as much suspense as possible but just know there is a SEX TOURNAMENT, a NEW HOTTIE (Apollo??? It’s me, Shannon. I promise my husband won’t mind!!!), letter writing, feet kicking banter, angst, and so! much! sex! There’s more Gabriel, huge character growth for Tem, and an under current of feminine power which just hits in today’s world.
THERES ALSO A FKIN’ GROTTO SCENE 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️ I fear I’ll be thinking about the grotto scene until I’m on my deathbed. MY DEATHBED I TELL YOU.
I had the distinct honor of being the first person to read Kiss of the Basilisk from beginning to end and am maintaining that honor with Between Two Kings (yes I will brag about it until the end of time thanks). To know Lindsay is to love her and simultaneously be afraid of her brain and the things she comes up with.
November 11 will be here before we know it but just know…I’ll always be #TeamLeo 👑
July 20, 2025
A book this bad does not deserve a cover this beautiful (I’m sorry to Lindsay, I think she’s hilarious and sweet) but this was nooot good.
This book is just that one girl who is like “I could definitely be polyamorous” except she can’t, because she has no communication skills, and really all she wants is to be the sole desire of every man on the planet regardless of everyone else’s feelings.
And if it were any other character, I might be like yes, slay, p*ssy queen.
But because it was THIS character? God no.
Tem has to be top 3 worst characters. Mary Sue is terrified of her. She is the special special, the greatest thing to ever exist. She is the most powerful, the most beautiful. Everyone wants her, she is a girl’s girl (that was used in the book, yes)
Except of course if that girl doesn’t like Tem. Then, that girl is just a bitch. If a girl has the guy Tem wants she is enemy #1, must be destroyed, is an evil villain.
Now, before I get onto the spice, I’ll say I really enjoyed the first book. It was campy, ridiculous, didn’t take itself seriously. And yes—horny as all get out.
But the smut aligned with the plot (at least for 90% of the scenes.) IN THIS BOOK? When I say this was all smut, no plot. Please believe me.
Any semblance of a plot, and I mean there were conflicts that appeared, immediately disappeared as quickly as they came so that Tem could bone someone. This had to have happened at least 35 times.
I do love a couple all smut campy, low fantasy goofball reads (e.g. Ice Planet Barbarians, Morning Glory Milking Farm, the first book in this series!)
But, this was too far. It was just cooooonstant “oh no, I love this guy, but I also love this guy, but I don’t want either of them to want any other girl, but I also want to bone every other basilisk I see…”
By the end, I was like…gentlemen, basilisks…what is it you see in this girl? What is it about her because I don’t understand. She has no personality, no motivation (beyond learning how to kill people, ignore Caspen at every turn, and sleep with people she shouldn’t), and no redeeming qualities.
All anyone did in the book was have s*x, emotionally hurt Caspen, and complain.
And by anyone, I mean Tem.
Reading this is how I imagine queer people feel while reading straight romance and for that, I’m truly sorry. If I had to read another “dripping onto the floor, c*m guzzling” scene one more time, it would have been the end of me.
Also, the end. Fucking criminal. Deserving of jail time.
Thank you to Edelweiss for providing me with an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
This book is just that one girl who is like “I could definitely be polyamorous” except she can’t, because she has no communication skills, and really all she wants is to be the sole desire of every man on the planet regardless of everyone else’s feelings.
And if it were any other character, I might be like yes, slay, p*ssy queen.
But because it was THIS character? God no.
Tem has to be top 3 worst characters. Mary Sue is terrified of her. She is the special special, the greatest thing to ever exist. She is the most powerful, the most beautiful. Everyone wants her, she is a girl’s girl (that was used in the book, yes)
Except of course if that girl doesn’t like Tem. Then, that girl is just a bitch. If a girl has the guy Tem wants she is enemy #1, must be destroyed, is an evil villain.
Now, before I get onto the spice, I’ll say I really enjoyed the first book. It was campy, ridiculous, didn’t take itself seriously. And yes—horny as all get out.
But the smut aligned with the plot (at least for 90% of the scenes.) IN THIS BOOK? When I say this was all smut, no plot. Please believe me.
Any semblance of a plot, and I mean there were conflicts that appeared, immediately disappeared as quickly as they came so that Tem could bone someone. This had to have happened at least 35 times.
I do love a couple all smut campy, low fantasy goofball reads (e.g. Ice Planet Barbarians, Morning Glory Milking Farm, the first book in this series!)
But, this was too far. It was just cooooonstant “oh no, I love this guy, but I also love this guy, but I don’t want either of them to want any other girl, but I also want to bone every other basilisk I see…”
By the end, I was like…gentlemen, basilisks…what is it you see in this girl? What is it about her because I don’t understand. She has no personality, no motivation (beyond learning how to kill people, ignore Caspen at every turn, and sleep with people she shouldn’t), and no redeeming qualities.
All anyone did in the book was have s*x, emotionally hurt Caspen, and complain.
And by anyone, I mean Tem.
Reading this is how I imagine queer people feel while reading straight romance and for that, I’m truly sorry. If I had to read another “dripping onto the floor, c*m guzzling” scene one more time, it would have been the end of me.
Also, the end. Fucking criminal. Deserving of jail time.
Thank you to Edelweiss for providing me with an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
November 12, 2025
No one talk to me ever again.
!!! There WILL be spoilers in this review towards the end!!
Alright, let’s get into the nitty gritty of why I absolutely hated every single thing about this book and why I refuse to recognize that it exists.
Tem - what the actual FUCK happened to her character?? She is supposed to be this all powerful Hybreed and have the best of both worlds yet she was spineless, weak and whiny. Not only did she enter this blood bond with Caspen without asking ANYTHING about it or learning ANYTHING about Basilisk culture, she processed to have an internal crisis every time she learned something she didn’t like or her human side was uncomfortable with. She REFUSED to tell Caspen the truth about still loving Leo and when it finally came out in the most dramatic and miscommunication trope way possible SHE had the nerve to be devastated?? Girl bye.
Leo- oh good lord he is such a little bitch. You mean to tell me as the King of the realm you don’t have enough of a spine to tell your little fiancé Evelyn to fuck off and stop spending his money?? Leo abolished the bloodletting of basilisks and all the sudden they had no money to feed the villagers and it took him WEEKS to come to the conclusion that he could start selling the mass amounts of gold he has just sitting in the palace. What the actual fuck. I’ve literally never hated an MMC more than I hate his bitch ass.
Caspen- Lindsay absolutely ASSASSINATED his character from book 1 and turned him into a secretive asshole. I still love him with my whole entire heart. He just wanted Tem to be happy as a basilisk and Tem refused to grow the fuck ip and communicate with him.
Apollo - I lurve him. He didn’t serve much of a purpose but he was hot so.
Here’s where we get into the issues with the plot.
The amalgamation of random ass side plots that were introduced in this book just for shits and giggles made me want to scream. All of the sudden there is a curse where if your blood bound partner loves someone else you’re cursed to kill them… okay not great. Tem and Caspen’s marriage gets contested so now there’s a sex trial where she’s expected to fuck all the contestants while her husband watches and her heart then is supposed to choose? You’ve got villagers setting fire to property because they’re STARVING because Leo wouldn’t fucking grow a pair and figure out how to feed them - all while Evelyn (FTB) sits pretty in the castle. Leo then allows Tem to volunteer to bloodlet so create gold so they’ll have money again. Excuse me??? You’re going to let the woman you supposedly love sit here and torture herself because YOU refuse to come up with a solution to your starving people? Gtfo seriously.
The cum fountain made me wanna puke and the sex centipede was disgusting. Did we not learn anything from “the Human Centipede”???
And last but not least, Caspen’s death. It broke me. It was SO beyond unnecessary and absolutely lazy writing and could’ve been prevented if he and Tem had just COMMUNICATED with each other. Not only that but what really added the cherry to the top of my pissed off sundae was the fact that five days after he was ashes on the wind, Tem moved back in with Leo, they remarry and all the sudden everyone’s happy again. Fuck that. She never deserved Caspen.
Whoever thought this plot was a good idea - I hope your sheets have crumbs in them and your pillow is always warm.
!!! There WILL be spoilers in this review towards the end!!
Alright, let’s get into the nitty gritty of why I absolutely hated every single thing about this book and why I refuse to recognize that it exists.
Tem - what the actual FUCK happened to her character?? She is supposed to be this all powerful Hybreed and have the best of both worlds yet she was spineless, weak and whiny. Not only did she enter this blood bond with Caspen without asking ANYTHING about it or learning ANYTHING about Basilisk culture, she processed to have an internal crisis every time she learned something she didn’t like or her human side was uncomfortable with. She REFUSED to tell Caspen the truth about still loving Leo and when it finally came out in the most dramatic and miscommunication trope way possible SHE had the nerve to be devastated?? Girl bye.
Leo- oh good lord he is such a little bitch. You mean to tell me as the King of the realm you don’t have enough of a spine to tell your little fiancé Evelyn to fuck off and stop spending his money?? Leo abolished the bloodletting of basilisks and all the sudden they had no money to feed the villagers and it took him WEEKS to come to the conclusion that he could start selling the mass amounts of gold he has just sitting in the palace. What the actual fuck. I’ve literally never hated an MMC more than I hate his bitch ass.
Caspen- Lindsay absolutely ASSASSINATED his character from book 1 and turned him into a secretive asshole. I still love him with my whole entire heart. He just wanted Tem to be happy as a basilisk and Tem refused to grow the fuck ip and communicate with him.
Apollo - I lurve him. He didn’t serve much of a purpose but he was hot so.
Here’s where we get into the issues with the plot.
The amalgamation of random ass side plots that were introduced in this book just for shits and giggles made me want to scream. All of the sudden there is a curse where if your blood bound partner loves someone else you’re cursed to kill them… okay not great. Tem and Caspen’s marriage gets contested so now there’s a sex trial where she’s expected to fuck all the contestants while her husband watches and her heart then is supposed to choose? You’ve got villagers setting fire to property because they’re STARVING because Leo wouldn’t fucking grow a pair and figure out how to feed them - all while Evelyn (FTB) sits pretty in the castle. Leo then allows Tem to volunteer to bloodlet so create gold so they’ll have money again. Excuse me??? You’re going to let the woman you supposedly love sit here and torture herself because YOU refuse to come up with a solution to your starving people? Gtfo seriously.
The cum fountain made me wanna puke and the sex centipede was disgusting. Did we not learn anything from “the Human Centipede”???
And last but not least, Caspen’s death. It broke me. It was SO beyond unnecessary and absolutely lazy writing and could’ve been prevented if he and Tem had just COMMUNICATED with each other. Not only that but what really added the cherry to the top of my pissed off sundae was the fact that five days after he was ashes on the wind, Tem moved back in with Leo, they remarry and all the sudden everyone’s happy again. Fuck that. She never deserved Caspen.
Whoever thought this plot was a good idea - I hope your sheets have crumbs in them and your pillow is always warm.
November 16, 2025
OKAY SO IN A SEA OF BAD REVIEWS, I have to give 5 stars. I’m sorry, but the reviews had me STRESSED that a book I’ve been waiting ALL YEAR FOR would be AWFUL. I do truly love Lindsay Straube’s insane brain to come up with a story as wild as this one BUT I read the Acknowledgments page at the end and it really made the story all feel whole for me. She even says “I’m Team Leo” in it (and she made herself very clear on IG as well) and included that those who were Team Caspen would get a prequel to right her wrongs to what she did in this book.
SPOILERS STARTING NOW✨✨✨
Should Caspen have been a jealous boyfriend at times where it felt unnecessary? No. But it is said numerous times that they don’t believe in giving their HEART out to more than one.
Was Tem a whiny brat 89% of the book? Of course. She was lowkey worse in the first one.
Caspen’s letter at the end broke my heart and let’s be honest, Leo in this book was kinda shit. I refuse to believe she really loved Leo that much when Caspen was there being… Caspen 🤤 Also I am just super in love with Apollo & I’ll miss him.
Long story short, I could handle this book and I wasn’t as devastated as I thought I would be. It hurt, don’t get me wrong, but it was still written well to me.
————————
Before reading: Speaking it into existence that this second book will be just as amazing as the first one 🤞🏼🤞🏼
SPOILERS STARTING NOW✨✨✨
Should Caspen have been a jealous boyfriend at times where it felt unnecessary? No. But it is said numerous times that they don’t believe in giving their HEART out to more than one.
Was Tem a whiny brat 89% of the book? Of course. She was lowkey worse in the first one.
Caspen’s letter at the end broke my heart and let’s be honest, Leo in this book was kinda shit. I refuse to believe she really loved Leo that much when Caspen was there being… Caspen 🤤 Also I am just super in love with Apollo & I’ll miss him.
Long story short, I could handle this book and I wasn’t as devastated as I thought I would be. It hurt, don’t get me wrong, but it was still written well to me.
————————
Before reading: Speaking it into existence that this second book will be just as amazing as the first one 🤞🏼🤞🏼
September 6, 2025
THIS WAS AN ARC READ, thank you the publisher for an early copy.
I have thoughts and I need to process them.
Without spoiling because this book doesn’t get released until I think November? I will say this book a SPICY good time and that’s all I will say. Because if I say ANYTHING else, it spoils the book and I’m not going to do that.
Just know there’s lots and lots of schmutt and it’s delicious.
I will say too that I did enjoy book one MORE than book two BUT BTK was just as spicy and delicious and campy and unputtdownable. HIGHLY RECOMMEND.
I have thoughts and I need to process them.
Without spoiling because this book doesn’t get released until I think November? I will say this book a SPICY good time and that’s all I will say. Because if I say ANYTHING else, it spoils the book and I’m not going to do that.
Just know there’s lots and lots of schmutt and it’s delicious.
I will say too that I did enjoy book one MORE than book two BUT BTK was just as spicy and delicious and campy and unputtdownable. HIGHLY RECOMMEND.
November 20, 2025
this book would’ve been better if all the characters died
December 6, 2025
This is going to be shirt because quite frankly I can’t see through my tears right now. Immediately 5 stars. Do I agree with the characters actions and the ending? No, personally I do not. Did I get annoyed because certain scenes and dialogues felt repetitive? Yes, I do. BUT do I agree with their actions and the ending as it stand for these characters personally? Absolutely I do. And do I think the repetitiveness was necessary to see certain character development and growth so those cycles could be broken? Yes, I do. Oh how I’d be laughing at me last year who thought this was a silly lighthearted basilisk book filled with smut. Jokes on me.
November 12, 2025
Caspen dies. Tem loses her basilisk side and ends up remarrying Leo. So all of that was for fucking nothing, which makes this entire story bullshit. And no, I’m not marking as spoilers because nobody should be subjected to this bullshit. Messy plot filled with holes and inconsistencies that make ZERO sense. Utter disappointment compared to the first book. If you’ve read the first book, stop there. The 1 star is simply for Apollo & Adelaide. Thanks to Bloom and NetGalley for the ARC.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
on-pause
November 10, 2025Picking this back up🐍👑
November 18, 2025
UPDATE : FULL REVIEW : 4.25 ⭐️ ∞ 💀 ∞ 🌶️ Thank you to the author and NetGalley for providing me with this ARC (= Agonizing Ruthless Calamity)…
Lindsay Straube who hurt you? And why did I have to be the one to get hurt in return? And MOST IMPORTANTLY, PLEASE TELL ME YOU HAVE A PLAN TO FIX THIS? 😭
I didn’t finish this book... It also didn’t finish me...
No... it OBLITERATED me.
Unwell doesn’t even begin to touch the surface of my current state.
I don't think I've ever been this speechless, empty, traumatized.
I guess I should have heeded Lindsay's repeated warnings 🥲
Also if y'all thought the first book was smutty and unhinged, you're in for rude awakening 🤣
This story is a fountain of laughter.
A tournament of lust,
And an Ouroboros of pain.
IYKYK
Now onto the actual review :
On the surface, the Split or Swallow series seems like straight up monster smut, which means it really is not for everyone.
For those of us who do like the genre, this is definitely WAAAAAY up there in the category, so even then, some might not enjoy it.
Now for those of us who do in fact enjoy this, I've come across two sides : people who see this as a good and bizarre smutty time, and people who are also able to see beyond that aspect of it.
I fall into that second category, so I know my review might end up sounding far fetched for some people, and that's okay.
I think with some basic understanding of psychology many more people would be able to see that there's actually a deeper meaning to it.
See, as I've already mentioned, Between Two Kings is even more smutty and unhinged than Kiss of the Basilisk, and personally I think that was very much intentional.
I think the level of intense and complex emotions Lindsay was able to portray into this second book is mind blowing. Her brain is, in my humble opinion, a pure wonder. Something worth studying. But that would be weird so I'll settle on waiting for her next book, and looking at her social media content (because it's unhinged and hilarious).
I have not yet come across another author who could make me feel this depth of emotional despair in a book so mind-bogglingly erotic.
And this is what I mean by I think it was done on purpose.
I think we were drowned in a sex tsunami of truly epic proportions in a way to shock our systems to survive the final revelations.
And with how utterly destroyed I was by the end of it, I can't begin to imagine how much worse it would have been had there not been this excessive amount of smut to allow me the space to be delusional and hold onto my belief that everything would be okay.
Because you see, I for one had a very strong instincts about what would happen (I hate my brain for being right)... And yet I spent the entire book deluding myself that it wouldn't be so.
I even made up scenarios where she would abandon both Capsen and Leo for someone else, because the blow would be softer that way. I invented obvious magical solutions that made no sense whatsoever so I would not have to survive through my heart being ripped out between my ribs.
I did all this while being perfectly conscious that I was wrong, and I think I was only able to do so because I was drowning in the most unhinged obscene basilisk sex customs page after page.
Which leads me to day, I think it's a pretty good metaphor for how we, humans, will use whatever we can in order not to face the truths of our situations.
Wishful thinking, they call it.
And sure in real life I doubt many people do anything remotely as unhinged as what this book describes, but we all, at one point or another use and abuse things, people, and substances to cope with the reality that we KNOW is about to come crashing down on us and bury us under what feels like tons and tons of concrete.
On top of that, the whole aspect of Tem struggling to make a choice between Caspen and Leo is yet another great metaphor of human behaviour.
A lot of us struggle to make even the most basic choices for ourselves on a day to day basis, and will wait until something or someone makes the decision for us.
And this applies to anything and everything, not just the reality of loving two people who are not willing to share you (EVEN THOUGH THEY FUCKING SAID THEY WOULD 😡).
The mind is a complex and treacherous machine, and when emotions come into play, everything becomes a million times more difficult.
I see so many people shitting on Tem for being unable to make a choice, for being pathetic, boring, annoying, insufferable, childish, showing no character growth whatsoever, and I am TRULY baffled by the amount of vitriol.
She is barely out of teenagehood. She was thrust in a situation where she fell for two people from opposite sides of every spectrum. She had to endure so many insane things and make decisions she should never even have been asked to consider, all after basically being a pariah with little to no life experience.
The fact that y'all can't look past the whole monster smut aspect and imagine what that might look and feel like in a more realistic situation is sad. Especially when I see what you have to say about the men in these books. Maybe check your internalized misogyny at the door.
To finish it off in the most agonizing way possible, not only did the choice happen, but it was the most horrific outcome possible.
And once that was done, there was a chain of connected events that just amplified the heartbreaking nature of the situation three times over... She lost (almost) EVERYTHING.
Did it feel like Lindsay wanted us to suffer so bad we couldn't think straight for days after? Yeah.
Did it feel like overkill? 100%
Did I hate every second of it? abso-fucking-lutely.
But you know what we say in real life? "When it rains, it pours."
And I think that was a brilliantly traumatic way to illustrate it.
Anyways I could keep drawing parallels all day but my brain is tired and just thinking about this book breaks my heart all over again.
Also I might be way off here, but I really don't care. This is how I experienced it.
Positives :
- the found family aspect
- seeing more of Gabriel
- Tem making friends
- the ridiculously unhinged, entertaining & educational smut ? 🤣
- depths of emotions
- the letters
- the love & care & devotion
- APOLLO 👹🥵❤️🔥
Negatives :
- THE PAIN
- THE TRAUMA
- THE FOUNTAIN/ELIXIR (sorry I really can't get behind that one 😅)
- THAT GREEDY SOULLESS BITCH (you'll know when you read her)
- THAT EVIL EMASCULATED PIECE OF JUNK (I'm sure you already know who I mean)
- EVERYTHING AT THE END
I will say this is not a 5 star for me because I feel like the last bit at the end was rushed.
The aftermath, the letters.
I did not get enough for it to even feel remotely finished.
Especially not after being put through the grinder a million times over.
I didn't expect and "And they had a whole bunch of babies and lived happily ever after" kind of ending, but I did expect at least one "aftermath" letter, some hard conversations, and even the teeny tiniest glimpse of what her new reality would be like.
Do I wish I never read this book? Yes and no, depends which version of me you ask.
Am I forever traumatized? Abso-fucking-lutely.
Do I recommend this? If you're a sadomasochist like me and can stomach some really unhinged smut? Yeah. BUT you've been thoroughly warned, so don't come crying to me.
———
not so Happy —Between Two Kings— Release Day 🐍🔥💔
I’m still in agony limbo days later… I can’t put it into words…
Lindsay Straube who hurt you? And why did I have to be the one to get hurt in return? And MOST IMPORTANTLY, PLEASE TELL ME YOU HAVE A PLAN TO FIX THIS? 😭
I didn’t finish this book... It also didn’t finish me...
No... it OBLITERATED me.
Unwell doesn’t even begin to touch the surface of my current state.
I don't think I've ever been this speechless, empty, traumatized.
I guess I should have heeded Lindsay's repeated warnings 🥲
Also if y'all thought the first book was smutty and unhinged, you're in for rude awakening 🤣
This story is a fountain of laughter.
A tournament of lust,
And an Ouroboros of pain.
IYKYK
Now onto the actual review :
On the surface, the Split or Swallow series seems like straight up monster smut, which means it really is not for everyone.
For those of us who do like the genre, this is definitely WAAAAAY up there in the category, so even then, some might not enjoy it.
Now for those of us who do in fact enjoy this, I've come across two sides : people who see this as a good and bizarre smutty time, and people who are also able to see beyond that aspect of it.
I fall into that second category, so I know my review might end up sounding far fetched for some people, and that's okay.
I think with some basic understanding of psychology many more people would be able to see that there's actually a deeper meaning to it.
See, as I've already mentioned, Between Two Kings is even more smutty and unhinged than Kiss of the Basilisk, and personally I think that was very much intentional.
I think the level of intense and complex emotions Lindsay was able to portray into this second book is mind blowing. Her brain is, in my humble opinion, a pure wonder. Something worth studying. But that would be weird so I'll settle on waiting for her next book, and looking at her social media content (because it's unhinged and hilarious).
I have not yet come across another author who could make me feel this depth of emotional despair in a book so mind-bogglingly erotic.
And this is what I mean by I think it was done on purpose.
I think we were drowned in a sex tsunami of truly epic proportions in a way to shock our systems to survive the final revelations.
And with how utterly destroyed I was by the end of it, I can't begin to imagine how much worse it would have been had there not been this excessive amount of smut to allow me the space to be delusional and hold onto my belief that everything would be okay.
Because you see, I for one had a very strong instincts about what would happen (I hate my brain for being right)... And yet I spent the entire book deluding myself that it wouldn't be so.
I even made up scenarios where she would abandon both Capsen and Leo for someone else, because the blow would be softer that way. I invented obvious magical solutions that made no sense whatsoever so I would not have to survive through my heart being ripped out between my ribs.
I did all this while being perfectly conscious that I was wrong, and I think I was only able to do so because I was drowning in the most unhinged obscene basilisk sex customs page after page.
Which leads me to day, I think it's a pretty good metaphor for how we, humans, will use whatever we can in order not to face the truths of our situations.
Wishful thinking, they call it.
And sure in real life I doubt many people do anything remotely as unhinged as what this book describes, but we all, at one point or another use and abuse things, people, and substances to cope with the reality that we KNOW is about to come crashing down on us and bury us under what feels like tons and tons of concrete.
On top of that, the whole aspect of Tem struggling to make a choice between Caspen and Leo is yet another great metaphor of human behaviour.
A lot of us struggle to make even the most basic choices for ourselves on a day to day basis, and will wait until something or someone makes the decision for us.
And this applies to anything and everything, not just the reality of loving two people who are not willing to share you (EVEN THOUGH THEY FUCKING SAID THEY WOULD 😡).
The mind is a complex and treacherous machine, and when emotions come into play, everything becomes a million times more difficult.
I see so many people shitting on Tem for being unable to make a choice, for being pathetic, boring, annoying, insufferable, childish, showing no character growth whatsoever, and I am TRULY baffled by the amount of vitriol.
She is barely out of teenagehood. She was thrust in a situation where she fell for two people from opposite sides of every spectrum. She had to endure so many insane things and make decisions she should never even have been asked to consider, all after basically being a pariah with little to no life experience.
The fact that y'all can't look past the whole monster smut aspect and imagine what that might look and feel like in a more realistic situation is sad. Especially when I see what you have to say about the men in these books. Maybe check your internalized misogyny at the door.
To finish it off in the most agonizing way possible, not only did the choice happen, but it was the most horrific outcome possible.
And once that was done, there was a chain of connected events that just amplified the heartbreaking nature of the situation three times over... She lost (almost) EVERYTHING.
Did it feel like Lindsay wanted us to suffer so bad we couldn't think straight for days after? Yeah.
Did it feel like overkill? 100%
Did I hate every second of it? abso-fucking-lutely.
But you know what we say in real life? "When it rains, it pours."
And I think that was a brilliantly traumatic way to illustrate it.
Anyways I could keep drawing parallels all day but my brain is tired and just thinking about this book breaks my heart all over again.
Also I might be way off here, but I really don't care. This is how I experienced it.
Positives :
- the found family aspect
- seeing more of Gabriel
- Tem making friends
- the ridiculously unhinged, entertaining & educational smut ? 🤣
- depths of emotions
- the letters
- the love & care & devotion
- APOLLO 👹🥵❤️🔥
Negatives :
- THE PAIN
- THE TRAUMA
- THE FOUNTAIN/ELIXIR (sorry I really can't get behind that one 😅)
- THAT GREEDY SOULLESS BITCH (you'll know when you read her)
- THAT EVIL EMASCULATED PIECE OF JUNK (I'm sure you already know who I mean)
- EVERYTHING AT THE END
I will say this is not a 5 star for me because I feel like the last bit at the end was rushed.
The aftermath, the letters.
I did not get enough for it to even feel remotely finished.
Especially not after being put through the grinder a million times over.
I didn't expect and "And they had a whole bunch of babies and lived happily ever after" kind of ending, but I did expect at least one "aftermath" letter, some hard conversations, and even the teeny tiniest glimpse of what her new reality would be like.
Do I wish I never read this book? Yes and no, depends which version of me you ask.
Am I forever traumatized? Abso-fucking-lutely.
Do I recommend this? If you're a sadomasochist like me and can stomach some really unhinged smut? Yeah. BUT you've been thoroughly warned, so don't come crying to me.
———
not so Happy —Between Two Kings— Release Day 🐍🔥💔
I’m still in agony limbo days later… I can’t put it into words…
December 12, 2025
they fucking killed him. and the book wasn’t even good.
November 2, 2025
You know what I really hate? When book two just shoots characters all to hell when it doesn’t coincide with the storyline of book one. This was Tamlin all over again. But worse. I’ll be pretending book one was a standalone.
Read
November 6, 2025i need time nobody talk to me
November 21, 2025
Who knew a book with a magical cum fountain could make me cry.
September 1, 2025
This was such a disappointing sequel. I was really hoping we would get a polyamorous storyline, but I was sadly mistaken. The ending is so painful.
November 16, 2025
After finishing I rated this 3 stars now I’m dropping it down to 2; after sitting with it for 12 hours I’m getting more and more angry at how she (the author) absolutely tanked this book. This has completely ruined book 1 for me.
Nothing made sense, nothing was even relevant. The spice was not good and was just there for the sake of it. The shock value moments had zero shock value. Zero plot. Leo was in it for exactly 3 minutes even though she ended up with him. Leo’s letters apparently convinced Caspen that Leo was her one true love and YET those letters could have been written by a 6 year old but Caspens final letter was a DECLARATION, it was wonderful and bittersweet. WHY after 2 books of being forced to hate Caspen did she give us this poetic letter from him after he died. What was the point in Apollo?? Does anyone know? Why couldn’t she have why choose’d with Apollo and Leo in the end if we really must kill Caspen? Gabriel went to the sea so why couldn’t she? Why kill off Caspen in the first place? Why all of a sudden did the crest need to be consummated but THE SERPENT KING who’s been alive FOREVER didn’t know that was even a thing?? Sure, ok 👍🏼
Book 1 I was a full Leo girlie, book 2 I ended up more of a Caspen girlie (even tho Caspen said some shitty things) because Leo was barely in it and that is very sad. Also #justiceforapollo
I know Tem gets a lot of hate but I didn’t mind her character at all, she was fine 🤷🏼♀️
I’m not going to lie, this wasn’t good and I won’t read the prequel.
Nothing made sense, nothing was even relevant. The spice was not good and was just there for the sake of it. The shock value moments had zero shock value. Zero plot. Leo was in it for exactly 3 minutes even though she ended up with him. Leo’s letters apparently convinced Caspen that Leo was her one true love and YET those letters could have been written by a 6 year old but Caspens final letter was a DECLARATION, it was wonderful and bittersweet. WHY after 2 books of being forced to hate Caspen did she give us this poetic letter from him after he died. What was the point in Apollo?? Does anyone know? Why couldn’t she have why choose’d with Apollo and Leo in the end if we really must kill Caspen? Gabriel went to the sea so why couldn’t she? Why kill off Caspen in the first place? Why all of a sudden did the crest need to be consummated but THE SERPENT KING who’s been alive FOREVER didn’t know that was even a thing?? Sure, ok 👍🏼
Book 1 I was a full Leo girlie, book 2 I ended up more of a Caspen girlie (even tho Caspen said some shitty things) because Leo was barely in it and that is very sad. Also #justiceforapollo
I know Tem gets a lot of hate but I didn’t mind her character at all, she was fine 🤷🏼♀️
I’m not going to lie, this wasn’t good and I won’t read the prequel.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 21, 2025
THIS
CONTAINS
SPOILERS
WORST. BOOK. EVER.
I can’t imagine a book with an ending more horrible than this one. If you read the first book, STOP THERE. Lindsay Straube essentially takes an ax to everything in the first book.
I made it to 39% and got super excited to see if two of the characters were going to hook up. I just couldn’t help myself, so I skimmed ahead for that specific part. Instead, I learned that this fucking bitch
You could not pay me to read another book by Lindsay Straube.
I’m actually glad that I found out early instead of reading up until that point. Just seeing the part that I did, I cried the rest of the night and woke up with swollen eyes. I had to use ice cubes for the swelling to go down. If I had read the actual scene itself, I don’t think I would have recovered. Right now, my recovery is slow. I'm still hurting from it and it's been a week since I found out.
WHAT ON EARTH WOULD POSSESS AN AUTHOR TO DO THIS?!?!
I will never forgive this author for what she did.
Unfortunately, I purchased this book, so it sucks even more that I DNF’d this motherfucker.
CONTAINS
SPOILERS
WORST. BOOK. EVER.
I can’t imagine a book with an ending more horrible than this one. If you read the first book, STOP THERE. Lindsay Straube essentially takes an ax to everything in the first book.
I made it to 39% and got super excited to see if two of the characters were going to hook up. I just couldn’t help myself, so I skimmed ahead for that specific part. Instead, I learned that this fucking bitch
You could not pay me to read another book by Lindsay Straube.
I’m actually glad that I found out early instead of reading up until that point. Just seeing the part that I did, I cried the rest of the night and woke up with swollen eyes. I had to use ice cubes for the swelling to go down. If I had read the actual scene itself, I don’t think I would have recovered. Right now, my recovery is slow. I'm still hurting from it and it's been a week since I found out.
WHAT ON EARTH WOULD POSSESS AN AUTHOR TO DO THIS?!?!
I will never forgive this author for what she did.
Unfortunately, I purchased this book, so it sucks even more that I DNF’d this motherfucker.
Read
May 27, 2025If they don’t end up all together (Leo, Tem and Caspen) I honestly can’t be bothered then.:)
November 13, 2025
No. Just no.
I don’t review things. Ever. I am making an exception for this because I am distraught. I feel a palpable sense of disdain towards this book, and in turn, Straube.
Kiss of the basilisk was one of my top reads this year. Completely unhinged and utterly ridiculous (in the best way), yet somehow Straube managed to make a story about basilisk smut emotionally gripping. I was deeply invested in the characters and have been anticipating this book. When this book showed up on my doorstep, the pure delight I felt was overwhelming. However, after reading it, I feel sad for the me from two days ago who is going to read this…
This book started well, great pacing, nasty and shocking smutty scenes (a good thing imo, and exactly what I was expecting).
I hated Apollo at first but he grew to become my favorite character.
I enjoyed the development of Adelaide’s friendship with Tem.
Gabriel going from leading the protests to #1basilisk fuck buddy was delightful.
Evelyn was upsetting in just the right way.
Maximus being all “I told you so” was v silly.
As I was reading the ending though, I felt sick. What the hell was that for? There were so many ways that better this could have been written. I have so many questions…
Why was it so abrupt?
Why was there so much time spent developing characters like Adelaide and Apollo, getting us emotionally invested in them just to end this with no resolution for them?
Most of the plot seemed to revolve around Tem adjusting to basilisk life just for that part of her to die, and their whole kingdom to just… peace out?
For a book with 500 pages, why was the ending was so rushed?
No happily ever after with Leo, at the very least??
We are just left with traumatized characters going through the motions of whatever the fuck that poor excuse for an ending was????
I wish I could go back in time and stop myself from buying this book. Spare yourself the time, money, and disappointment.
I don’t review things. Ever. I am making an exception for this because I am distraught. I feel a palpable sense of disdain towards this book, and in turn, Straube.
Kiss of the basilisk was one of my top reads this year. Completely unhinged and utterly ridiculous (in the best way), yet somehow Straube managed to make a story about basilisk smut emotionally gripping. I was deeply invested in the characters and have been anticipating this book. When this book showed up on my doorstep, the pure delight I felt was overwhelming. However, after reading it, I feel sad for the me from two days ago who is going to read this…
This book started well, great pacing, nasty and shocking smutty scenes (a good thing imo, and exactly what I was expecting).
I hated Apollo at first but he grew to become my favorite character.
I enjoyed the development of Adelaide’s friendship with Tem.
Gabriel going from leading the protests to #1basilisk fuck buddy was delightful.
Evelyn was upsetting in just the right way.
Maximus being all “I told you so” was v silly.
As I was reading the ending though, I felt sick. What the hell was that for? There were so many ways that better this could have been written. I have so many questions…
Why was it so abrupt?
Why was there so much time spent developing characters like Adelaide and Apollo, getting us emotionally invested in them just to end this with no resolution for them?
Most of the plot seemed to revolve around Tem adjusting to basilisk life just for that part of her to die, and their whole kingdom to just… peace out?
For a book with 500 pages, why was the ending was so rushed?
No happily ever after with Leo, at the very least??
We are just left with traumatized characters going through the motions of whatever the fuck that poor excuse for an ending was????
I wish I could go back in time and stop myself from buying this book. Spare yourself the time, money, and disappointment.
November 3, 2025
no it’s fine I just didn’t think she’d actually do it
Want to read
May 13, 2025I hope Leo comes back!!!
November 14, 2025
I’m writing this in the waiting room at the dentist’s office, so forgive me if it’s not as concise as I’d hoped.
I finished BTK last night and literally went to bed with a rage-induced headache because of it. This book pissed me off, and I’m still pissed this morning. So much so that I couldn’t even wait until I wasn’t in the waiting room at the dentist’s office to write this review.
Where to start? This was a dumpster fire, and I cannot understand how one goes from KOTB to this. KOTB was campy and fun. It didn’t take itself seriously. It worked. This was a completely different reading experience and fell so, so, so flat. Lindsay makes no attempts to hide her extreme bias toward Leo, which, in and of itself, pretty much made it clear who Tem would choose in the end. But that’s the thing, Tem didn’t CHOOSE at all! The choice was essentially made for her because Caspen was killed off by the author after 500+ pages of character assassination to give Tem the ending Lindsay wanted. I'm not upset at the fact that the author wanted their main character to end up with their favorite of the two love interests. It's how it happened that I have a problem with. It’s so LAZY and IMO the worst way to “solve” a love triangle. This story would’ve been so much better as a Why Choose but the author’s determination to make Tem “choose” ruined it.
Tem ending up with Leo in the end is ludicrous, I’m sorry. I am so baffled by the way Lindsay totally annihilated Caspen’s character in favor of Leo, but then, at the same time, couldn't even be bothered to do ANYTHING to make Leo seem more desirable. He actually came off worse in BTK than he did in KOTB. He was a spoiled little boy in the first book, but at least he still had charm and some charisma. In BTK, he’s nothing more than a spineless coward with absolutely zero personality. I cannot understand how we’re supposed to believe and support that Tem would WANT to be with the man who allowed her to bleed for his riches. He could’ve told her not to do it, and he didn’t. On top of that, he couldn’t even be bothered to stay there with her like she’d asked. On top of THAT, it didn't even occur to him that he could sell the plethora of gold that he already has in the castle instead of bloodletting Tem until AFTER Tem's bloodletting. He couldn't even stand up to Evelyn; he let her walk all over him, and for WHAT? He was clearly unhappy with her, but would rather endure it and allow Tem to be bloodletted than simply tell her "no"? Leo does not love Tem. I’m sorry, you cannot convince me that he actually loves her.
And speaking of Evelyn, my god, she was so fucking cartoonishly evil it was almost cringeworthy. But the worst part was that she just…disappears? We get absolutely no explanation of what happened. Did Leo make her leave? Did she leave on her own? What was the conversation between Leo and Evelyn after he found out about the real reason she left? And will she suffer ANY consequences for her actions, or is she just getting off scot free? Also, the idea that she'd leave in the first place makes absolutely no sense. She was willing to run away with Leo in the first book, but in BTK, it's revealed that Leo's father gave her money to leave him instead. If she truly only cared about money, WHY would she have been willing to run away with Leo and live a life of poverty? It feels like Lindsay hadn't thought of the idea to make Evelyn a villain until after KOTB.
The plot itself just left so much to be desired. Every 10 pages, Caspen or Adelaide or Apollo or whoever reveals some ancient basilisk ritual or tradition that Tem didn't know about, and it's so hard to keep track of all these new rules and the associated consequences. They all felt like plot devices to force Tem into Leo's arms. BTK takes place a mere week after the events of KOTB, meaning it's only been a week since Leo abolished the bloodletting, yet somehow in the span of seven days, the entire kingdom is destitute? Were there no reserves? Tem's resistance to telling Leo about Evelyn was so forced and out of character for her. KOTB Tem would've told him immediately, even without proof. The only reason she didn't was because, if she did, the book would've been over in the first 100 pages. The same goes for her keeping the "secret" of having to consummate the crest with Leo for the entirety of the book. She knows Leo is dying because of it, knows that Caspen is weaker because he's bound to her, and she's weaker because of it, but still somehow selfishly waits until the last 15% of the book to finally let it out? Also, we spend SO much of this book witnessing Tem try to balance her basilisk and human sides, only for her to lose her basilisk side when Caspen dies, but not really because she still has all her basilisk powers minus the ability to transition, so who cares?!
The entire ending of this book was abysmal, garbage, AWFUL! It’s wrapped up so quickly I almost got whiplash. We’re barely given any time to grieve for Caspen, we’re given the bare minimum explanation for what happens to the side characters that we’ve been invested in the entire story (Apollo, Adelaide, Gabriel, Damon, fuck even Cypress!) and suddenly Tem is living with Leo and then we get 200 pages of boring letters from Leo to Tem and one letter from Caspen that paints him as the bad guy and Tem as the perfect person. I’m livid, this was such a waste of time!
EDIT TO ADD: I was just thinking about how ridiculous it is that she ends up with Leo, or even still loves him in the first place and remebered how Caspen literally castrated a man and turned two other men to stone for daring to harm Tem, and her “one true love” Leo couldn’t even muster the courage to stop Tem from bloodletting. Utter bullshit.
I finished BTK last night and literally went to bed with a rage-induced headache because of it. This book pissed me off, and I’m still pissed this morning. So much so that I couldn’t even wait until I wasn’t in the waiting room at the dentist’s office to write this review.
Where to start? This was a dumpster fire, and I cannot understand how one goes from KOTB to this. KOTB was campy and fun. It didn’t take itself seriously. It worked. This was a completely different reading experience and fell so, so, so flat. Lindsay makes no attempts to hide her extreme bias toward Leo, which, in and of itself, pretty much made it clear who Tem would choose in the end. But that’s the thing, Tem didn’t CHOOSE at all! The choice was essentially made for her because Caspen was killed off by the author after 500+ pages of character assassination to give Tem the ending Lindsay wanted. I'm not upset at the fact that the author wanted their main character to end up with their favorite of the two love interests. It's how it happened that I have a problem with. It’s so LAZY and IMO the worst way to “solve” a love triangle. This story would’ve been so much better as a Why Choose but the author’s determination to make Tem “choose” ruined it.
Tem ending up with Leo in the end is ludicrous, I’m sorry. I am so baffled by the way Lindsay totally annihilated Caspen’s character in favor of Leo, but then, at the same time, couldn't even be bothered to do ANYTHING to make Leo seem more desirable. He actually came off worse in BTK than he did in KOTB. He was a spoiled little boy in the first book, but at least he still had charm and some charisma. In BTK, he’s nothing more than a spineless coward with absolutely zero personality. I cannot understand how we’re supposed to believe and support that Tem would WANT to be with the man who allowed her to bleed for his riches. He could’ve told her not to do it, and he didn’t. On top of that, he couldn’t even be bothered to stay there with her like she’d asked. On top of THAT, it didn't even occur to him that he could sell the plethora of gold that he already has in the castle instead of bloodletting Tem until AFTER Tem's bloodletting. He couldn't even stand up to Evelyn; he let her walk all over him, and for WHAT? He was clearly unhappy with her, but would rather endure it and allow Tem to be bloodletted than simply tell her "no"? Leo does not love Tem. I’m sorry, you cannot convince me that he actually loves her.
And speaking of Evelyn, my god, she was so fucking cartoonishly evil it was almost cringeworthy. But the worst part was that she just…disappears? We get absolutely no explanation of what happened. Did Leo make her leave? Did she leave on her own? What was the conversation between Leo and Evelyn after he found out about the real reason she left? And will she suffer ANY consequences for her actions, or is she just getting off scot free? Also, the idea that she'd leave in the first place makes absolutely no sense. She was willing to run away with Leo in the first book, but in BTK, it's revealed that Leo's father gave her money to leave him instead. If she truly only cared about money, WHY would she have been willing to run away with Leo and live a life of poverty? It feels like Lindsay hadn't thought of the idea to make Evelyn a villain until after KOTB.
The plot itself just left so much to be desired. Every 10 pages, Caspen or Adelaide or Apollo or whoever reveals some ancient basilisk ritual or tradition that Tem didn't know about, and it's so hard to keep track of all these new rules and the associated consequences. They all felt like plot devices to force Tem into Leo's arms. BTK takes place a mere week after the events of KOTB, meaning it's only been a week since Leo abolished the bloodletting, yet somehow in the span of seven days, the entire kingdom is destitute? Were there no reserves? Tem's resistance to telling Leo about Evelyn was so forced and out of character for her. KOTB Tem would've told him immediately, even without proof. The only reason she didn't was because, if she did, the book would've been over in the first 100 pages. The same goes for her keeping the "secret" of having to consummate the crest with Leo for the entirety of the book. She knows Leo is dying because of it, knows that Caspen is weaker because he's bound to her, and she's weaker because of it, but still somehow selfishly waits until the last 15% of the book to finally let it out? Also, we spend SO much of this book witnessing Tem try to balance her basilisk and human sides, only for her to lose her basilisk side when Caspen dies, but not really because she still has all her basilisk powers minus the ability to transition, so who cares?!
The entire ending of this book was abysmal, garbage, AWFUL! It’s wrapped up so quickly I almost got whiplash. We’re barely given any time to grieve for Caspen, we’re given the bare minimum explanation for what happens to the side characters that we’ve been invested in the entire story (Apollo, Adelaide, Gabriel, Damon, fuck even Cypress!) and suddenly Tem is living with Leo and then we get 200 pages of boring letters from Leo to Tem and one letter from Caspen that paints him as the bad guy and Tem as the perfect person. I’m livid, this was such a waste of time!
EDIT TO ADD: I was just thinking about how ridiculous it is that she ends up with Leo, or even still loves him in the first place and remebered how Caspen literally castrated a man and turned two other men to stone for daring to harm Tem, and her “one true love” Leo couldn’t even muster the courage to stop Tem from bloodletting. Utter bullshit.
November 9, 2025
NOPE DO NOT TELL ME THAT IS THE END
I was so excited for this book. So fucking excited. I knew what I was in for. I understood it was not a why choose. I get it. But that CANNOT BE THE ENDING. Blasphemy.
The ending? It was rushed. The last 5% or so was so… rushed ?! No detail. Not even half of a happily ever after. Just throw the letters in there and make me cry again. Thanks. Like don’t worry about the deadline, write the book. Unless that was how it was intended. I guess…
The first 85% of this books pacing was good! It was delightful. It was smut. It’s basilisk smut. I expected nothing less. I ATE IT UP.
But the ending? No. Nope. What the hell. How can you be between 2 kings if that’s how we end it? Sorry no. I can’t. I’m still trying to wrap my brain around it.
Honestly? I’d stop at book 1 🫣
Overall 2.5 ⭐️, every 🌶️ known to man.
Thank you so much Sourcebooks Bloom and NetGalley for allowing me to read an advanced copy of this!
I was so excited for this book. So fucking excited. I knew what I was in for. I understood it was not a why choose. I get it. But that CANNOT BE THE ENDING. Blasphemy.
The ending? It was rushed. The last 5% or so was so… rushed ?! No detail. Not even half of a happily ever after. Just throw the letters in there and make me cry again. Thanks. Like don’t worry about the deadline, write the book. Unless that was how it was intended. I guess…
The first 85% of this books pacing was good! It was delightful. It was smut. It’s basilisk smut. I expected nothing less. I ATE IT UP.
But the ending? No. Nope. What the hell. How can you be between 2 kings if that’s how we end it? Sorry no. I can’t. I’m still trying to wrap my brain around it.
Honestly? I’d stop at book 1 🫣
Overall 2.5 ⭐️, every 🌶️ known to man.
Thank you so much Sourcebooks Bloom and NetGalley for allowing me to read an advanced copy of this!
November 12, 2025
Did the author pay you for these arc reviews because how're y'all giving this 4/5 stars? The first one at least had a plot. The first was outrageous and campy, yet oddly addicting and fun. This was all cringey smut, no plot. Introduced characters and all were loose ends. And why would you kill off thee main character? I wish I could get my $9.99 back.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 12, 2025
Clocked where this was going on page 3 with this quote
“Tem had chosen Caspen. But it wasn't because she didn't love Leo. It was because she wanted more for Leo. And in doing so, she had accepted less for herself.”
Being with Capsen is less… wow.
And then we spent majority of the book trying to convince the reader to hate Caspen when Leo is literally spineless 😭 just gonna let the woman you ‘love’ bleed herself because you’re poor? 🤨
Sorry not convinced that’s her true love. Ending was predictable, and disappointing. I had held hope that the authors own personal bias of “team leo” wouldn’t be the ending, given the fact he’s actually kind of the worst, but I was wrong. Caspen deserved better in all aspects. I don’t know if there’s another book, but if there is, and he comes back. I hope he finds better than tem.
“Tem had chosen Caspen. But it wasn't because she didn't love Leo. It was because she wanted more for Leo. And in doing so, she had accepted less for herself.”
Being with Capsen is less… wow.
And then we spent majority of the book trying to convince the reader to hate Caspen when Leo is literally spineless 😭 just gonna let the woman you ‘love’ bleed herself because you’re poor? 🤨
Sorry not convinced that’s her true love. Ending was predictable, and disappointing. I had held hope that the authors own personal bias of “team leo” wouldn’t be the ending, given the fact he’s actually kind of the worst, but I was wrong. Caspen deserved better in all aspects. I don’t know if there’s another book, but if there is, and he comes back. I hope he finds better than tem.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 17, 2025
I’m actually unwell?? I loved this and now I’m emo about it??? I don’t know how to FEEL but I should’ve seen this coming. I DID see this coming and then I talked myself out of it.
I’ll be back to write more but 4 stars. Thanks for this or something??? I need to have words with Lindsay and maybe spend 10 min max in her head.
The more I think about it, I’m let down by lack of character development and how this came together. Still a fun great time and I enjoyed it but wish it came together different
I’ll be back to write more but 4 stars. Thanks for this or something??? I need to have words with Lindsay and maybe spend 10 min max in her head.
The more I think about it, I’m let down by lack of character development and how this came together. Still a fun great time and I enjoyed it but wish it came together different
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