Living Proof: A Medical Mutiny

by Michael Gearin-Tosh

I was told I had cancer and that I must expect to die soon. Almost eight years later I still do my job and enjoy life. I have not had conventional treatment. Did my cancer simply disappear? Did I do nothing? Far from it. A number of things happened, some by accident, most by design.

Michael Gearin-Tosh is diagnosed with cancer at the age of fifty-four. The doctors urge immediate treatment. He refuses. Intuitively, not on the basis of reason. But as the days pass, Gearin-Tosh falls back on his habits as a scholar of literature. He begins to probe the experts' words and the meaning behind medical phrases. He tries to relate what each doctor says -- and does not say -- to the doctor's own temperament. And the more questions he asks, the more adamant his refusal to be hurried to treatment.

The delay is a high-risk gamble. He listens to much advice, especially that of three women friends, each with a different point of view, one a doctor. They challenge him. They challenge medical advice. They challenge one another. On no occasion do they speak with one voice. He also turns to unexpected guides within his own memory and in the authors he loves, from Shakespeare and Chekhov to Jean Renoir, Arthur Miller, and Václav Havel.

In the end, he chooses not to have chemotherapy but to combat his cancer largely through nutrition, vitamin supplements, an ancient Chinese breathing exercise with imaginative visualizations, and acupuncture.

No how-to book or prescriptive health guide, Living Proof is a celebration of human existence and friendship, a story of how a man steers through conflicting advice, between depression and seemingly inescapable rationalism, between the medicine he rejects and the doctors he honors.

Clear-eyed and unflinching, Gearin-Tosh even includes his own medical history, "The Case of the .005% Survivor"; explores general questions about cancer; and examines the role of individual temperament on medical attitudes, the choice of treatments, and, of course, survival.

Genres: Nonfiction, Autobiography

340 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2002

Reviews

[Simon Hollway · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a weird one that will go unnoticed in the white chop and froth of the internet but feels necessary. I knew this book was being written at the time but then lost contact with the author for the last few years of his battle. He was an instrumental figure in my education and then, as the age-old student/teacher trope dictates, I forgot about him. Until a few weeks ago when a potential date (meh) conducted an internet search on my name and up popped a quote about me in this book. It was like opening a time capsule. I was no one special, nor were the dozens of other ex-students that Michael had the incredible grace, caring and love to give a mention to (I mean who has the time for that in a book about battling cancer???). But that was Michael. The most loving man I have ever met. The most gentle soul. The repository of more wisdom than a dozen men could ever attain in their lifetimes. However, unlike myself, I could list the names of the now globally recognised actors, writers, poets, critics, film directors and creative dynamos that were lovingly crafted, honed and prepared for the brutal real world by this man's hands. There was a very special era at Oxford university when, for a decade and more, some of the world's greatest artists emerged from just one college, under the tutelage of just one man, time after time.

Michael survived far longer than anyone hoped for. His book charts many of the natural and radical methods he employed to lengthen his stay here. And many of us are in no doubt that they worked. However, the one over-riding force that kept Michael alive beyond medical prognosis and one that his natural humility would never broadcast, was the one force that blazed like a white heat within him: his love for others and his transcendent passion for literature. RIP PROFESSOR Michael Gearin-Tosh.

[M · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book really opened my eyes to the process of being treated for a life threatening illness. It also provides a vast amount of literary and scientific quotes and is not just a good book for anyone who knows someone or is suffering from cancer but anyone in general. There are some good life lessons in this book.

[Libby · Rating 2 out of 5]

What an odd book. It starts with one of the most fearful descriptions of chemotherapy I've ever heard, aside from an account of a woman who had chemo for breast cancer back in the 60s. 50 years ago, chemotherapy was vicious, and it's still a very powerful drug, but the author here sounds terrified as if he were writing from the old stories he'd heard rather than from reality or experience. His writing style is highly opinionated and wanders off its track several times, making it difficult to follow. I don't respond well to stories of "avoid this it's horrible, it does terrible things". I prefer stories that focus on the benefits. But if you respond well to meandering fear-mongering, help yourself. This might be the book for you.

[AC · Rating 3 out of 5]

I am always drawn to the power of nature to heal. Having said that, this book was not an easy one to read. Parts of the book were densely scientific, other parts seem to recount a man’s meandering mind… But it was inspirational to think that the author was brave enough to approach his cancer in his own way – and that it worked!

[Barbara Joan · Rating 1 out of 5]

Michael Gearin-Tosh chose a difficult path in dealing with his cancer. One has to admire his spirit but I wouldn't recommend his book to anyone in a similar position because I think that reading it would cause even more stress than was necessary.

[Patricia · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a head scratcher, honestly. The author responds to a life-threatening illness in a way that I'm pretty sure does not make sense in a lot of cases. But it's a riveting read of someone who refuses to be scared out of thinking for himself.