Looked After: A Childhood in Care

by Ashley John-Baptiste

'This is a book that everyone must read. It's funny, moving and of course it's often sad. But mainly it's a beautiful and fascinating and enlightening portrait of the care system, a world that is barely understood by many of us. It is also a proper page the twists and turns and set-backs of his childhood are as gripping as they are shocking. I genuinely couldn't put it down. This story is more urgent and relevant now than ever.' - XAND VAN TULLEKEN

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Ashley John-Baptiste grew up in the British care system, living with five different families, without ever being truly part of a family.

It wasn't easy, or straightforward, and Ashley's ever-changing living situation affected every single part of his life - from his education to his sense of identity to his friendships and his hobbies. And yet, throughout everything his childhood in care threw at him, Ashley remained resilient and found a way to take advantage of the opportunities that came his way.

Now Ashley feels able to tell us - vividly and movingly - how, when it felt like the world was turning its back on him, he refused to be an outsider in his own home and set about establishing a new and positive life for himself.

Looked After is a memoir written from the heart that pulls no punches but demonstrates that given encouragement and love - and, sometimes, a second chance - a care-experienced boy can become a successful broadcaster, a loving husband and a proud father.

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'Rage-inducing from start to finish. It is such a powerful story, but it's also a rallying cry for change. It will mean so much to lots of kids out there and should be read by every social worked in the land.' - WES STREETING

'Ashley John-Baptiste joins a high class of writing by upstanding respectful and honourable citizens and professionals, professors and actors, lawyers, doctors, artists and authors, all who happen to have had a life in care. We have every right to tell our story as much as anyone else. Welcome, Ashley.' - LEMN SISSAY

'An inspiring story of triumph over adversity.' - FATIMA WHITBREAD

'Ashley has done the country a great service in shining a light on the inhumane - and at times brutal - way that society supports this most vulnerable group of children. Every politician should read this book and commit to fixing the system.' - SHARON WHITE

'Beautifully written, with such immediacy, clarity and warmth.' - EAMON McCRORY, Professor of Developmental Neuroscience and Psychopathology at UCL

Genres: Nonfiction, Audiobook, Biography Memoir

Audible Audio

Published June 13, 2024

Reviews

[Libby-Jade · Rating 5 out of 5]

before I started my current job, I wasn't aware at all really what being care experienced meant, the ongoing implications of this nor the lack of support that exists for many care experienced children and young people. once i found out, I was shocked there wasn't more public outrage, support and overarching sense of care and solidarity for them. I often fear getting older and what that means, but I do also feel sort of hopeful that once my life is more stable that I may be able to offer support, whether through fostering or volunteering, for a young person in care.

I really encourage my pals who are interested to learn more about what being care experienced means to read this (sorry tho I got it on my kindle so can't lend it out xx)

[Gemma · Rating 5 out of 5]

As someone who works in the Local Authority (EHCP team), it was very enlightening to read Ashley's life story.

[Karen Gallaher · Rating 5 out of 5]

We take family life - the highs and lows for granted: the hugs and the familiarity. Looked after children don't have that luxury. The is a story of a survivor.

[Katie Loves Kitty cats · Rating 5 out of 5]

An honest, raw, heart breaking experience of growing up in care. As a child in care nurse myself it resonated with the many experiences of the children/young people I see.

[Kate Lovegrove · Rating 5 out of 5]

An honest and compelling book that I couldn’t put down. It is heart-wrenching, highlighting the need for committed teachers but more importantly that every child needs a champion. Ashley’s determination, faith and resilience is humbling. I highly recommend this book - but have your tissues ready!

[Alice Golding · Rating 5 out of 5]

Read this in a couple of hours round the pool, eye opening, heartbreaking (subtly wiping tears whilst sat by the pool 🤦🏻‍♀️), uplifting - I’ve never preordered a book before I preordered this one, and I’m glad I did (even if it did take me a bit longer to get to read it due to how long my previous read took..!)

[Maya · Rating 5 out of 5]

A wonderful book that every person and definitely definitely every teacher should read. Touching, sad, and uplifting... the book guides us through Ashley's childhood to reveal the unfairness and harshness of the care system, and the vulnerability of being a child jostled about by forces outside his control. At times, the surprising insightfulness of parts of the author's biographical retelling - especially during the earlier part of his childhood - belies the adult lens he's writing through and throws into doubt the voice and reflections that narrate the biography. Whilst it makes the story clearer, I would have loved a more creative approach towards illustrating young Ashley's voice. However, a potent and touching book. Recommend

[Vicky Thirlaway · Rating 5 out of 5]

Read this in a single day. Heartbreaking in places, and also amazing how resilient some people are able to be. I’d give this more stars if I could.

[Holly Thomas · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amazing

[Ellie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amazing, so eye opening and important for everyone working with children to read

[Sue Powell · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this book in two days, and thought about it when I wasn’t reading it. It should be compulsory for every teacher and anyone responsible for designing the so called ‘care’ system in this country. What an amazing person he is, but he should never have had so many hurdles put in his way - no child should be treated like this.

[Kirsty Capes · Rating 5 out of 5]

I absolutely loved this compelling, hard-hitting memoir from journalist Ashley John-Baptiste, covering his life in foster care, as he is tugged to and fro across South London, amid a smorgasbord of disjointed placements and schools, and shepherded by a revolving door of social workers and care professionals. With deftness and clarity, Ashley charts his chaotic journey through the care system from age 4 to 18, gently highlighting the many ways in which the system failed him - and continues to fail children in care today.

Despite the hard parts, the book is packed with moments of lightness and triumph, and it celebrates the joyful moments just as frankly as it does the lows. A gorgeous memoir and a must-read for anyone interested in the reality of growing up in care.

[Beth Munbai · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great insight into Ashley’s experience, the care system, foster care and care homes. This was a long time ago I hope things have moved on and that carers understand the importance of/ want to show affection and children as young as four do not get put into care homes. However I don’t know if that’s the case. Also some examples of great care too. There are some things I would have liked to have known more about Ashley’s experience at university, meeting his wife, having his children and how those parts of his story have been impacted by his care experience. I also wondered if Ashley’s foster carers have read his story and what their responses were. Thought provoking read and I hope that those overseeing the systems in our country listen to his story and take action.

[Michelle Richardson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Everyone who works with young people who are in care should read this book. As a social worker supporting 16 to 18 year olds this book rings true in so many ways. Children in care need love and safety and all practitioners need to work in a child focused way to support them. This is such an inspiring read and shows how we should all be listening to the child’s voice. We wouldn’t leave our own children to fend for themselves at 18 and nor should we children who are looked after they deserve to feel important, loved and supported. This book highlights this gaps within children’s services that need to be addressed

[Joe Tristram · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely gripping and heart-wrenching. Everyone should and could read this book. There's nothing horrific here, just the simple story of how it feels to be a child in a care system that feels like it doesn't care. Ashley J-B makes it through intact, achieving far more than most foster children but only just. A different encounter or a different decision on several occasions would have had him as one of the many adults who get through a childhood of being "looked-after" with no sense of self-worth and have a much more difficult life than those who go forward with the assurance of parental love and support.
Easy to read and compelling.

[Danielle · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this book after listening to Ashley on the Happy Place podcast with Fearne Cotton. I actually preordered the book as I found his story so moving. The book didn’t disappoint and had me in tears several times. Unbelievable guy with such drive and determination despite his constant set backs from being let down all his life. Broke my heart that he questioned his worth so much as a child because of how adults who were supposed to nurture him made him feel. His story is a must read and I’ll be sharing with everyone. Well done and thank you for sharing your story Ashley.

[Dilyana Karadzhova · Rating 5 out of 5]

Well, I cried throughout this book.

What touched me most were the moments when teachers, social workers, the children’s home workers show that they actually care. In a care system that doesn’t seem to care, Ashley occasionally meets people who believe in him. It just shows how important relationships are for all of us. The system prioritises checklists over continuity and relationships and yet Ashley manages to navigate through it and succeed.

I am deeply touched by his honesty and vulnerability. Worth reading.

[Mrs Margaret Bray · Rating 5 out of 5]

A triumph of hope over experience!

Ashley has allowed us to see into those most private places he had to make in order to survive a life experience that was intended for his well-being and yet which devalued him and deprived him of the unconditional love that is vital for life. He is an important voice for all those who have been, or are, trying to survive life in care. And everyone who works in the care system should read this book.

[Yikai & Samuel · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely love Ashley’s story. Very often we hear “experts” talk about social care and child psychology with sophisticated theories and jargons. But very rarely we actually stop to listen to the children in care. Ashley’s perspective is so important for the society to hear.

Also such an inspiring Cambridge story. It has been a bumpy journey but Ashley made it! Can��t stop but feeling pure happy for him as I read that part.

[Simon Court · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lemn Sissay’s blurb on the front cover, ‘In telling stories, we change the world,’ is very apt for this hard, heartfelt account of Ashley’s childhood. Ashley is living out a different story than the one he inherited, and it is powerful beyond words. A must-read for those who care about social structures and institutions, teaching, families, church leading and friendship.

[Aishah · Rating 5 out of 5]

I finished this book four days ago and I'm still thinking about it. A must read for everyone but especially those working in public services. Ashley's story is both sad and hopeful, demonstrating the power and importance of a simple hug, love, acceptance, encouragement and stability. It costs nothing but means everything.

[Lois Daniels · Rating 5 out of 5]

I work with looked after children, trying to make sure they reach their potential and aspirations in their education. It gave me an insight into the struggles they encounter and the heartache they experience.

This is a must read book for everyone. Thank you Ashley John-Baptiste for allowing us to share your journey.

[Emma Whitehead · Rating 5 out of 5]

An emotional read but one that should inspire change however small by individuals that work within social care and education roles to make bigger changes that every individual can do. If every team around a child read this, imagine the difference to lives that is possible. All children would not just feel that they belong but knowing that they do.

[Emma Gundry · Rating 5 out of 5]

Beautifully and honestly written - the story of a life in care should be read by every teacher as a call to arms that we make sure every young person, but particularly those in care, feel like that they matter and belong.

[Jessica Suenson-Taylor · Rating 5 out of 5]

Grateful to Ashley for this memoir. As someone working with children in care I will take many lessons from it and thank him for his insight. Moved me to tears on several occasions and I read it all in a matter of hours.

[Liz Longworth · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting life story.

[Jo · Rating 4 out of 5]

Listened to this after hearing him on a podcast.
Amazing story of how he was able to turn his life round

[Emily · Rating 4 out of 5]

Phew. Well done. Hoping for a sequel

[Ellie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Every teacher and adults involved with child who are in the care system MUST read this insightful and heartfelt memoir ⭐️

[Georgina · Rating 5 out of 5]

So sad but so inspiring, would highly recommend!!