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The All of It: A Bogan Rhapsody
If you're alive, you can do anything.
If you're reading this, you're not dead.
Seven years ago, Ben was loveless, overweight, in debt and living in his parents' rumpus room, trying to find a way to quietly die. Days passed by in a haze of marijuana smoke and self-loathing.
Then, one day, Ben decided not to die. He decided to change everything - starting with the Ben bit. Becoming Cadance would be more than a gender transition. It would be a transition in every way. It would mean leaving behind a rural Mudgee childhood filled with Frogger, hot chips, Godliness and a forbidden love of Sarah Parker's My Little Pony; and the violence, drugs and secrecy that plagued her twenties. Choosing to live was just the beginning; what mattered was how she existed. She was going to experience the all of it.
Written with dazzling creativity and exuberance, The All of It is a wild coming-of-gender memoir like no other. Tender, tragic, hilarious and life-affirming, it will leave you understanding a little more about trans people, rural Australia, family, millennials and the beautiful contradictions of our kaleidoscopic world.
If you're reading this, you're not dead.
Seven years ago, Ben was loveless, overweight, in debt and living in his parents' rumpus room, trying to find a way to quietly die. Days passed by in a haze of marijuana smoke and self-loathing.
Then, one day, Ben decided not to die. He decided to change everything - starting with the Ben bit. Becoming Cadance would be more than a gender transition. It would be a transition in every way. It would mean leaving behind a rural Mudgee childhood filled with Frogger, hot chips, Godliness and a forbidden love of Sarah Parker's My Little Pony; and the violence, drugs and secrecy that plagued her twenties. Choosing to live was just the beginning; what mattered was how she existed. She was going to experience the all of it.
Written with dazzling creativity and exuberance, The All of It is a wild coming-of-gender memoir like no other. Tender, tragic, hilarious and life-affirming, it will leave you understanding a little more about trans people, rural Australia, family, millennials and the beautiful contradictions of our kaleidoscopic world.
- GenresNonfictionMemoirQueer
Audible Audio
First published July 7, 2022
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 35 reviews
October 6, 2022
Sharing her journey as a transgender woman who began life as Benjamin in Mudgee in 1984, The All of It: A Bogan Rhapsody is an authentic, moving and often funny memoir from Australian author, director, producer and writer, Cadance Bell.
As a boy, the eldest surviving son of a nurse and coal mine worker, growing up in rural Australia, Ben experienced a not unusual working class childhood. He attended the local Catholic school, went rabbit-hunting with his Dad, quarry-jumping with his younger brother, and looked forward to a weekly treat of hot chips, but secretly Ben coveted his classmate’s uniform dress and My Little Pony.
Bell is an excellent storyteller as she leads us through her childhood into adulthood, sharing important moments of discovery, achievement, realisation and loss. Her experiences are familiar, full of the ordinary sorrows and joys of life, yet also unique. Hiding her truth came at great cost, confused and ashamed by their gender dysphoria, terrified someone would discover her secret stashes of magazines and women’s clothes, Bell succumbed to food and drug addictions, fell victim to an abuser, and hid himself away. Until Bell realised something had to change.
Wonderfully written with such sincerity and heart, The All of It is a candid, courageous and fascinating memoir. I want to recommend it to everyone, especially anyone who may be grappling with their gender identity, or trying to understand someone who is.
As a boy, the eldest surviving son of a nurse and coal mine worker, growing up in rural Australia, Ben experienced a not unusual working class childhood. He attended the local Catholic school, went rabbit-hunting with his Dad, quarry-jumping with his younger brother, and looked forward to a weekly treat of hot chips, but secretly Ben coveted his classmate’s uniform dress and My Little Pony.
Bell is an excellent storyteller as she leads us through her childhood into adulthood, sharing important moments of discovery, achievement, realisation and loss. Her experiences are familiar, full of the ordinary sorrows and joys of life, yet also unique. Hiding her truth came at great cost, confused and ashamed by their gender dysphoria, terrified someone would discover her secret stashes of magazines and women’s clothes, Bell succumbed to food and drug addictions, fell victim to an abuser, and hid himself away. Until Bell realised something had to change.
Wonderfully written with such sincerity and heart, The All of It is a candid, courageous and fascinating memoir. I want to recommend it to everyone, especially anyone who may be grappling with their gender identity, or trying to understand someone who is.
July 18, 2022
This brilliant, achingly beautiful book is unlike any memoir I have ever read. Cadance uses the most amazing sensory language to make the reader truly feel as though they are in each moment - I viscerally felt the vicarious fear, sorrow, anger, amusement, triumph and joy as Cadance told the story of her extraordinary life so far.
The storytelling style is so human, so compassionate and circumspect, with a strong streak of humour and kindness throughout. It really makes you feel as though this wonderful person has sat down with you in a pub and gifted you, the lucky reader, with the most candid and insightful sharing of herself.
It is honest, frank, and despite exploring some of the darker aspects of life, so uplifting and full of joy. I can't wait to read it again and will be recommending it to everyone I know!
The storytelling style is so human, so compassionate and circumspect, with a strong streak of humour and kindness throughout. It really makes you feel as though this wonderful person has sat down with you in a pub and gifted you, the lucky reader, with the most candid and insightful sharing of herself.
It is honest, frank, and despite exploring some of the darker aspects of life, so uplifting and full of joy. I can't wait to read it again and will be recommending it to everyone I know!
November 2, 2022
I kind of hate how much I enjoyed this (affectionate).
This was my book club's read for November and I didn't want to read a memoir. I was also initially a little confused because a lot of this reads like a fiction novel, and to be honest I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of things were embellished a little or written to be tongue in cheek for a modern audience (see: remarks about coal).
Much of Bell's teen and young adult years remind me a lot of my own. It helped me connect with her, to feel the turmoil those years must have been.
I'd love to know what Marion was doing now. She was clearly mentally ill. And Daniel- was it only the drug use effecting his judgement, or was something else at play here?
Though I'm not going to rush out and read another memoir (I am, admittedly, a little tired of them), I did thoroughly enjoy this and hope Cadance experiences great success in the future.
This was my book club's read for November and I didn't want to read a memoir. I was also initially a little confused because a lot of this reads like a fiction novel, and to be honest I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of things were embellished a little or written to be tongue in cheek for a modern audience (see: remarks about coal).
Much of Bell's teen and young adult years remind me a lot of my own. It helped me connect with her, to feel the turmoil those years must have been.
I'd love to know what Marion was doing now. She was clearly mentally ill. And Daniel- was it only the drug use effecting his judgement, or was something else at play here?
Though I'm not going to rush out and read another memoir (I am, admittedly, a little tired of them), I did thoroughly enjoy this and hope Cadance experiences great success in the future.
July 21, 2022
Fuck. I’m laying in bed crying after finishing this book. Cadance Bell is a bogan laureate.
This is probably one of the most important memoirs I’ve ever read.
Cadance, thank you for letting us experience #TheAllOfIt
This is probably one of the most important memoirs I’ve ever read.
Cadance, thank you for letting us experience #TheAllOfIt
July 21, 2022
This book was unlike most memoirs I've read. I felt pulled into the narrative so deeply! I laughed out loud, I winced, I cried, I felt it all!
June 2, 2023
3.5 stars
Thank you to Penguin Australia for sending me a copy of this book to review!
Cadance Bell grew up in the country town of Mudgee as Ben Lynch. Ben never quite felt like he fit in at school and although he created a persona that people liked, he just struggled to like who he was. Secretly he had a stash of women’s clothes that he enjoyed wearing and felt comfortable in. However when your family is pretty bogan and has notables such as bank robbers, drug addicts and the town drunk, this was a secret that Ben felt was sordid and disgraceful.
When Ben hit rock bottom following a particular incident and almost gave up on life, something clicked and he made the decision to take control of his life - starting with putting Ben behind him and transforming into Cadance where she found the self- love and acceptance that had been missing her whole life.
I was interested to read this to get a perspective on the transition process and the thoughts and feelings around the various stages, however this was only a very minor part of the book. I found the book interesting regardless, if perhaps a little long.
I can’t say I loved the writing, but it definitely nailed “bogan” so in that it hit its mark! And I do have to say that although I know this is a memoir and not an autobiography, so liberties are taken in the storytelling, I found a few embellishments that were easily found to be incorrect by a quick google search. While in the scheme of things it doesn’t really matter, it makes me question the validity of other things in the book 🤔
That aside, it’s an interesting story, very readable and a touching insight into the life of a transgender woman - albeit most of the book is prior to her transition. I am sincerely glad that she has found her happy place and that she continues to thrive! ⭐️⭐️⭐️.5/5
Thank you to Penguin Australia for sending me a copy of this book to review!
Cadance Bell grew up in the country town of Mudgee as Ben Lynch. Ben never quite felt like he fit in at school and although he created a persona that people liked, he just struggled to like who he was. Secretly he had a stash of women’s clothes that he enjoyed wearing and felt comfortable in. However when your family is pretty bogan and has notables such as bank robbers, drug addicts and the town drunk, this was a secret that Ben felt was sordid and disgraceful.
When Ben hit rock bottom following a particular incident and almost gave up on life, something clicked and he made the decision to take control of his life - starting with putting Ben behind him and transforming into Cadance where she found the self- love and acceptance that had been missing her whole life.
I was interested to read this to get a perspective on the transition process and the thoughts and feelings around the various stages, however this was only a very minor part of the book. I found the book interesting regardless, if perhaps a little long.
I can’t say I loved the writing, but it definitely nailed “bogan” so in that it hit its mark! And I do have to say that although I know this is a memoir and not an autobiography, so liberties are taken in the storytelling, I found a few embellishments that were easily found to be incorrect by a quick google search. While in the scheme of things it doesn’t really matter, it makes me question the validity of other things in the book 🤔
That aside, it’s an interesting story, very readable and a touching insight into the life of a transgender woman - albeit most of the book is prior to her transition. I am sincerely glad that she has found her happy place and that she continues to thrive! ⭐️⭐️⭐️.5/5
July 6, 2022
A heartfelt memoir on growing up in rural Australia in the 90s and embracing your gender identity.
Laugh-out-loud funny in moments but with the ability to hit the emotional mark with deep accuracy, Cadance Hall has a writing style I would happily read again and again. This is written like talking to your best friend down the pub. Chapters are short but build the bigger picture with astute self-reflection and pinpointed moments of joy and heartbreak whilst growing up. Each story layers itself into a complex and deep social commentary on Australia’s attitude to trans people, addiction, and living in rural communities.
There are passages of this which perfectly encapsulates Australian summers and the nostalgia associated with childhood. This, paired with insight of grappling with gender identity and feeling isolated, creates a touching memoir.
I’m really excited to read anything Hall produces if this is the standard.
Laugh-out-loud funny in moments but with the ability to hit the emotional mark with deep accuracy, Cadance Hall has a writing style I would happily read again and again. This is written like talking to your best friend down the pub. Chapters are short but build the bigger picture with astute self-reflection and pinpointed moments of joy and heartbreak whilst growing up. Each story layers itself into a complex and deep social commentary on Australia’s attitude to trans people, addiction, and living in rural communities.
There are passages of this which perfectly encapsulates Australian summers and the nostalgia associated with childhood. This, paired with insight of grappling with gender identity and feeling isolated, creates a touching memoir.
I’m really excited to read anything Hall produces if this is the standard.
July 10, 2022
This book will make you cry, make you cringe, make you laugh but above all give you a raw and brutally honest window into what it is like to be born into the wrong body. Kind of a LGBTQIA+ coming of age book about a girl who was born a boy in rural Australia. Could not recommend it enough. In the sage words of Molly Meldrum, do yourself a favour and grab a copy of this book!
November 27, 2022
What a great book. I laughed, cringed and often could not believe that I had read something …. So had to reread it. I cried and was angry as well. It is a very raw story, nothing is left untold (sometimes I wished it was) but it is essential. I also really liked the background and environment as it is something I can relate to and remember … makes the memoir very relatable.
April 10, 2024
Lovely, in its way. As a native of Mudgee myself, I was fascinated to read the story of a transgender bogan (who didn't know what 'transgender' meant at the time) who was only one year ahead of me in school. Stories from my hometown are few and far between.
Bell has a knack for storytelling and atmospheric flavour, and conjures up a series of vignettes elucidating smalltown life. She presents a sensible and compassionate view of what it was like to grow up as a boy in a working class culture where gender rules were fixed, only to feel inside from an early age that she just didn't fit the box. It's a useful read for anyone unfamiliar with transgender issues, as it sensitively captures the challenges of growing up trans in a non-ideological way. It's also a fun if riotous retelling of bogan life. While I caught glimpses of the Mudgee I knew, Bell and I were born on opposite sides of the tracks, and so her perception of the town is certainly not mine! You could read this book and come away with the perception that it's a one-horse town built around a mine and some patches of dirt, as opposed to a thriving regional centre. (It was neat, however, to occasionally be in the same moment with her, those times when a specific time or certain event - hello, St Matthews School fire - was experienced by both of us in that same moment, even if we didn't know one another.) A caveat though: this shouldn't be read by younger readers. Aside from the coarse language and obvious adult themes, there is a fair bit of sexualisation and description of actions such as masturbation.
Yet... I do feel that there's a fair bit of embellishment running through Bell's story. My suspicion started with the small things, little references to Mudgee which didn't quite ring true or were just factually inaccurate, as if the author felt that a little drop of fiction here or there would make the town more "authentic" in the eyes of the 99.999% of Australians who didn't grow up there. Suspicions grew with some of the early chapters, dialogue-heavy vignettes of her family, taking place when she is a mere seven or eight years old. Fair enough, she's trying to recreate her childhood, and feels that - especially for people who live in what amounts to an oral culture at times - dialogue is the best way to do it, even if you can't possibly remember these conversations in an in-depth manner. But taking this approach allows her to present a particular perception of her family, friends, teachers, and acquaintances, in a way that purports to be biographical but comes closer to being a series of short stories. It becomes difficult to navigate the line between what is an actual memory, drawn-from-life as it were, and what is an author's interpretation of a situation. All of which is par for the course, perhaps, for this kind of memoir-lite. But in the later chapters, when our heroine finds herself facing a series of alarmingly unlikely scenarios, one begins to wonder. Did her university housemate really burst into her room naked in an attempt to catch her masturbating, perform acts of sexual assault that she would later claim were done to her, and develop a strange bipolar personality that was sometimes filled with evangelical Christian zeal and sometimes obscene and radical? Did her brother really go around town routinely bashing people's skulls in with a claw hammer? Was she really invited as a teenager onto the set of The Matrix as a lovable live-in urchin? A series of deliberately shocking circumstances grow in number and scatter themselves across the narrative, and those earlier generous recreations of the truth make me doubt the later ones.
In the book's first half, Bell captures the humour and pain at the confluence of being a lower-class, smalltown, transgender kid in the '90s. It's a story rarely told, and certainly helped open my eyes. Yet I can't help feeling that the drama of the book's second half becomes melodrama at times, and not of the compelling variety.
Bell has a knack for storytelling and atmospheric flavour, and conjures up a series of vignettes elucidating smalltown life. She presents a sensible and compassionate view of what it was like to grow up as a boy in a working class culture where gender rules were fixed, only to feel inside from an early age that she just didn't fit the box. It's a useful read for anyone unfamiliar with transgender issues, as it sensitively captures the challenges of growing up trans in a non-ideological way. It's also a fun if riotous retelling of bogan life. While I caught glimpses of the Mudgee I knew, Bell and I were born on opposite sides of the tracks, and so her perception of the town is certainly not mine! You could read this book and come away with the perception that it's a one-horse town built around a mine and some patches of dirt, as opposed to a thriving regional centre. (It was neat, however, to occasionally be in the same moment with her, those times when a specific time or certain event - hello, St Matthews School fire - was experienced by both of us in that same moment, even if we didn't know one another.) A caveat though: this shouldn't be read by younger readers. Aside from the coarse language and obvious adult themes, there is a fair bit of sexualisation and description of actions such as masturbation.
Yet... I do feel that there's a fair bit of embellishment running through Bell's story. My suspicion started with the small things, little references to Mudgee which didn't quite ring true or were just factually inaccurate, as if the author felt that a little drop of fiction here or there would make the town more "authentic" in the eyes of the 99.999% of Australians who didn't grow up there. Suspicions grew with some of the early chapters, dialogue-heavy vignettes of her family, taking place when she is a mere seven or eight years old. Fair enough, she's trying to recreate her childhood, and feels that - especially for people who live in what amounts to an oral culture at times - dialogue is the best way to do it, even if you can't possibly remember these conversations in an in-depth manner. But taking this approach allows her to present a particular perception of her family, friends, teachers, and acquaintances, in a way that purports to be biographical but comes closer to being a series of short stories. It becomes difficult to navigate the line between what is an actual memory, drawn-from-life as it were, and what is an author's interpretation of a situation. All of which is par for the course, perhaps, for this kind of memoir-lite. But in the later chapters, when our heroine finds herself facing a series of alarmingly unlikely scenarios, one begins to wonder. Did her university housemate really burst into her room naked in an attempt to catch her masturbating, perform acts of sexual assault that she would later claim were done to her, and develop a strange bipolar personality that was sometimes filled with evangelical Christian zeal and sometimes obscene and radical? Did her brother really go around town routinely bashing people's skulls in with a claw hammer? Was she really invited as a teenager onto the set of The Matrix as a lovable live-in urchin? A series of deliberately shocking circumstances grow in number and scatter themselves across the narrative, and those earlier generous recreations of the truth make me doubt the later ones.
In the book's first half, Bell captures the humour and pain at the confluence of being a lower-class, smalltown, transgender kid in the '90s. It's a story rarely told, and certainly helped open my eyes. Yet I can't help feeling that the drama of the book's second half becomes melodrama at times, and not of the compelling variety.
September 8, 2024
Mixed feelings about this one - there's no doubt that Bell can spin an engaging yarn but sometimes (as other reviewers have mentioned) you find yourself wondering how much of it is actually true. More jarring, for me, is the fact that sometimes this reads like a linear narrative and sometimes like a series of vignettes - I think I would have preferred Bell to pick one or the other and stick with it.
Still, an interesting read.
Still, an interesting read.
October 15, 2023
I'm not quite sure what this book was supposed to be. I found the writing style frustrating, with trival stuff gone through in boring detail (looking for flats in Sydney) and big important plotlines skimmed in sentences (gender transition arc). It also felt like Cadance was trying to write in a 'writerly' way, with occasional clunky use of large words which seemed ill fitting to the rest of the style. Also - there's just no need for so many pointless analogies (it was as hot as a blue tongue in a microwave). What the fuck does that even mean? If analogy spotting was a drinking game I'd be pissed within the first third of the book. Cadance's writing was at it's best when it was direct - such as recounting her brother's psychotic episode where he tried to kill everyone. It was honest and gripping. But it also made me think the parents helped create this mess by ignoring clear signs of mental illness, calling it simple family arguements.
I feel this book would have been better if it focussed on one aspect of Ben/Cadance's life. The gender dysphoria / transition story; family dynamics and living with mental illness in an abusive household etc. But this book jumped clunkily with immense detail about certain stories, to another with no explanation, such as how suddenly Cadance has gone from having her own website business to working on films or talking at the Sydney Opera House (which is mentioned, but not explained).
This book needed direction and an editor. There are great examples of memoirs which focus on aspects or large, complex lives (I'm thinking of Alan's Cumming's two very different memoirs). Sadly I was left not really engaged with this story as I found it hard to connect to Cadance. The lack of reflection and insight made this feel like a bunch of non sequiturs strapped together. I wanted more, and was thankful to get to the end.
I feel this book would have been better if it focussed on one aspect of Ben/Cadance's life. The gender dysphoria / transition story; family dynamics and living with mental illness in an abusive household etc. But this book jumped clunkily with immense detail about certain stories, to another with no explanation, such as how suddenly Cadance has gone from having her own website business to working on films or talking at the Sydney Opera House (which is mentioned, but not explained).
This book needed direction and an editor. There are great examples of memoirs which focus on aspects or large, complex lives (I'm thinking of Alan's Cumming's two very different memoirs). Sadly I was left not really engaged with this story as I found it hard to connect to Cadance. The lack of reflection and insight made this feel like a bunch of non sequiturs strapped together. I wanted more, and was thankful to get to the end.
July 21, 2022
I heard a lot of hype about this book. I found the first half boring and difficult to get through. It started to get interesting in the middle part but the courtcase and other aspects seemed unbelievable/untrue. After listening to an audio recording of the actual courtcase, my suspicions were confirmed. The recount differs quite wildly from what actually happened which leads me to question the veracity of the rest of the book. I expect memoirs to be as factual. Disappointed!!!!
September 12, 2022
Funny,sad, uplifting and very real
Working class country life is delicately skewered in a ‘sweet and sour’ recounting of child to adult, as likeable Ben hides inner identity struggles and later is savaged by a woman scorned, before ultimately finding a liberating rainbow at the end of the tunnel. And along the way Dad scores some pretty decent meat pies, while even in her darkest times, Mum manages to maintain at least three cats.
Working class country life is delicately skewered in a ‘sweet and sour’ recounting of child to adult, as likeable Ben hides inner identity struggles and later is savaged by a woman scorned, before ultimately finding a liberating rainbow at the end of the tunnel. And along the way Dad scores some pretty decent meat pies, while even in her darkest times, Mum manages to maintain at least three cats.
October 17, 2022
Cadance writes quite well and at times has a quirky way of using language, but I am not sure the book needed to be that long. It seems , she wrote the book more to work things out for herself (and there were a few horrific experiences) than to reveal what transgender women go through in general to get to the life they want to live.
bogan
noun (derogatory, informal)
an uncouth or unsophisticated person regarded as being of low social status. Hmmmmm.
bogan
noun (derogatory, informal)
an uncouth or unsophisticated person regarded as being of low social status. Hmmmmm.
October 17, 2022
dnf sadly this wasn't for me and I am a fancy bogan at best. Each chapter felt like a short story, some good some so so. It fell a bit flat for me.
February 10, 2023
It took me awhile to get through this book. I liked it, but didn't love it. I struggled at times to stay interested and then at other times I was fully immersed in the story.
June 3, 2025
I’m not sure why I let this book be Accidentally Stalled for 2 years. I bought a copy early on and started reading it in 2023. Now I’m not sure that I even remember 2023… the stalling is much more about my reading style than any comment on the book.
Anyway very recently I came across the audiobook on Indy and soon I was happily listening away. Cadence grew up in Mudgee in Central West NSW, a town I’m familiar with and an area I’ve lived in for over 25 years. Actually I’m familiar with all of the other locations - Sydney, Bathurst, Dubbo, Albury. Which is unusual even for an Australian book.
It’s an extraordinary tale she tells. Her boyhood in Mudgee first as a Catholic school boy and then finishing up high school at the local public school. She had an awareness of but no name for her gender dysphoria from quite a young age. Her voice is authentic and the book very well written. I’m very glad to have finally finished it.
Read as part of my Trans Project and for Pride 2025.
Anyway very recently I came across the audiobook on Indy and soon I was happily listening away. Cadence grew up in Mudgee in Central West NSW, a town I’m familiar with and an area I’ve lived in for over 25 years. Actually I’m familiar with all of the other locations - Sydney, Bathurst, Dubbo, Albury. Which is unusual even for an Australian book.
It’s an extraordinary tale she tells. Her boyhood in Mudgee first as a Catholic school boy and then finishing up high school at the local public school. She had an awareness of but no name for her gender dysphoria from quite a young age. Her voice is authentic and the book very well written. I’m very glad to have finally finished it.
Read as part of my Trans Project and for Pride 2025.
March 2, 2023
The All Of It: A Bogan Rhapsody is one of my favourite books, following the journey and life of Cadance Bell- a transgender woman growing up in Mudgee with no understanding of what being transgender is or how she is feeling. As a trans person myself, I find books like these so incredibly valuable, Cadance places the reader in the mindset of herself and in a larger sense allows the reader to have a deeper understanding of the experiences and mindsets of trans people as a whole.
The All Of It: A Bogan Rhapsody is funny, emotional, heavy, and exciting- it takes you on an emotional roller coaster where you find yourself feeling as if you are really there with Cadance throughout her life- this book is an extremely vulnerable and open memoir and I applaud Cadance on her ability to so eloquently place these experiences into words.
The All Of It: A Bogan Rhapsody is funny, emotional, heavy, and exciting- it takes you on an emotional roller coaster where you find yourself feeling as if you are really there with Cadance throughout her life- this book is an extremely vulnerable and open memoir and I applaud Cadance on her ability to so eloquently place these experiences into words.
November 11, 2022
Wow, where do I start with my praise for this book? The incredibly rich writing? That’s a start, I suppose. The touching way Cadance tells her story, equally self-deprecating as proud of her journey? Perhaps I could mention the parts of her life she reveals, sometimes so ordinary you wonder why it was important and yet full of pathos, other times shocking and jarring, a sudden change in the narrative that strikes like a bolt completely out of the blue. I dunno, I could go on for a long time waxing lyrical, but I will say most certainly that this is one of the best books I’ve read this year.
May 13, 2023
4.5 stars
A really great read. A great memoir about growing up in regional Australia during the dawn of the internet age, and about the peculiar challenges of growing up trans.
There were some difficult times in this book that are definitely worth a content warning or two, but the author is good at navigating us through them. There was one part that I skipped as it got too heavy for me, and that was easy enough to do with the way the chapters are structured.
A really great read. A great memoir about growing up in regional Australia during the dawn of the internet age, and about the peculiar challenges of growing up trans.
There were some difficult times in this book that are definitely worth a content warning or two, but the author is good at navigating us through them. There was one part that I skipped as it got too heavy for me, and that was easy enough to do with the way the chapters are structured.
June 25, 2025
Overall this was an interesting story about a young boy growing up in a country town experiencing body dismorphia and not truly understanding why. As he grows he comes to learn what it means to be transgender and as an adult makes the transition. I found this story to be riveting in parts and in other parts I found myself struggling to remain interested. I also felt there was an over use of various writing techniques eg metaphors/personification throughout the book which also put me off.
January 25, 2023
A bit of a hard read, this is a warts and all detailed journey. But that's what I loved. So honest and brave. I also really loved the writing style. So bloody aussie! You described so many things that non-aussies would not get in a million years. Laughed, cried and felt all the things. Well done xx
June 13, 2024
A really great read. A memoir about growing up white in regional Australia during the dawn of the internet age, featuring the peculiar challenges of growing up trans.
Note that there are several -isms and -phobias that come up in this one (racism, homophobia, ableism, transphobia, sexism..)
Note that there are several -isms and -phobias that come up in this one (racism, homophobia, ableism, transphobia, sexism..)
April 28, 2025
Such a funny and engaging read. This is really hard subject matter for a lot of people and I think Cadance has done an amazing job at making it really accessible and enjoyable for everyone. Highly recommend!
July 18, 2022
Amazing memoir of an amazing life. So many feels all the way through. I laughed, cried, felt it all. A must read!! #TheAllOfIt
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November 12, 2022I had expected more on the transition process but this was a minor part of the book
November 19, 2022
I genuinely loved this book. It was so real and raw and deeply interesting. Cadance Bell is a truly remarkable woman!
December 28, 2022
This was a pretty emotional read, but the whole book just left me feeling so happy for Cadance, and so in awe of her strength.
April 3, 2023
I can't rate this book highly enough. Cady tells her story beautifully, growing up Ben in 90s country NSW. I wish everyone would read this book.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 35 reviews