So.
I'm not happy about my rating as I felt pretty good about the book for about half of the time, but in the end there's no way I'm able to give it more stars. I really don't know why it all went to shit in the 2nd half, and I guess even the author would be hard pressed to explain - they probably felt need to have some conflict, but the way they went to get it... please just don't do it again!
Let's get all my grievances out here, then:
1. Ty - he's the least of them actually, though I can understand if some people have issues with his sexcapades during the Miami party in the first half. I didn't feel so great about it myself, but it made sense given his character - he's a playboy with deep abandonment issues and all things relationship scare him to death, so it makes sense if he's unwilling to call his dates with Gabe dates though that's clearly what they are and behave accordingly. So yes, he could have done better, but it had happened before his relationship with Gabe gathered any speed and traction, and he's just a human after all:) And actually, once he gets over himself, he tries to make it work, which sadly can't be said about..
...2. Gabe. I was absolutely in love with him at the beginning, admiring his sunny disposition and courage to lead his life freely despite his disadvantage, and I especially loved how he went after Ty despite previous disappointments with hearing men and warnings from his friends - that's a way to go, man! You want something, you go after it. I want more people like this in my romances! There are never enough of them.
But sadly that fresh wind turns pretty stale really fast, shortly after he really gets what he was after :D Talk about irony here! And all it takes to bring all his insecurities out of the hiding is one "intervention" from his so called friends, after extremely uncomfortable scene in which they grill Ty about his intentions at Ty's birthday party. I don't get why they are even there, actually - Gabe didn't even deem it necessary to introduce them to Ty previously, and I'd say with good reason as they don't bother to hide their disapproval and suspicion towards Tyler. Yet suddenly he lets them loose at the poor man during the event which is supposed to make him feel good! (that's the purpose of surprise birthday parties, right? to celebrate someone you know and like with others who know and like them?)
And the mindfuck doesn't end here. Ty's sad, Gabe is enraged his friends made him sad and then left in a huff like a bunch of fucking primadonas, so he goes after them to give them piece of his mind and.... And it takes Lucas, the "friends'" pack leader and unbelievable prick, about ten minutes to explain to him that Ty and him are just not to be, not only because Ty hears and Gabe is deaf so there always will be something Ty's not sharing with Gabe, but because he knows all about Ty based on information from some common acquaintance and so he knows for a fact that Ty is a party slut that can't be trusted. And, a real cherry on the top of this shit sundae, he holds against Ty even his lack of knowledge about Gabe's illness which is something Gabe somehow forgot to tell him.
And there go all my positive feelings towards Gabe. He just goes incommunicado without Ty literally doing anything wrong, then agrees to one meeting to clear things up but after seeing Ty TALKING IN A PUBLICE PLACE with previous hookup he goes MIA again without letting him get in ONE word of explanation..... And that's it. All those shared moments and deep conversations, all that kinship and those weeks when they spent all their free time sandwiched together - it's all worth nothing because prophet Lucas spoke and Gabe's courageous facade slipped away to reveal little insecure coward.
And that's it folks. That's the conflict. And let me tell you, its resolution after MONTHS of no contact is equally disappointing and underwhelming (and Tyler's doing all the work, obviously, God only knows why). And yes, these months apart involve Tyler hooking up with other guy which I saw described as cheating in some reviews here, but, seriously?! You disappear out of your lover's life refusing to explain anything and hear anything he has to say, you have ZERO rights to claim his faithfulness, his devotion, his anything, actually. So that didn't bother me at all, just left me wondering what the hell happened to that nice story I started to read?
And now to my biggest peeve of them all, if you please:
3. Lucas and his cult. This is exactly the impression I got about Gabe's deaf gay circle of friends, and I'm pretty sure that's not the result the author was aiming for, but let's just look at the facts: We have cult leader holding a court, preaching his teaching to his followers and disapproving any relationship outside of his circle. We have a group tightly knit together, spending most of their free time together, keeping to themselves and suspicious if not downright hostile to people "outside", discouraging others members to reach out to them. Seriously, the only way missing is a walled compound somewhere in deep woods.
The way I see it, THIS IS ABSOLUTELY NOT THE WAY HOW TO PORTRAY PEOPLE WITH DISABILITIES IN ANY STORY - not if you want to do them any service, at least :D. Yes, there are pricks and idiots anywhere so there are without any doubt amongst deaf people as well. Yes, there is undoubtedly some reason for a bit of wariness and certain guardedness towards hearing people. But anything I hear from and about disadvantaged people suggests the majority of them feel and want to be treated pretty normal, so I somehow don't feel they would be overjoyed by this portrayal.
I'm certainly not, and I would really appreciate a better explanation of the motives, some progress in the group's thinking shown, and at least one person from this circle supporting Gabe, advocating for relationships based on feelings instead of deafness level - I thought Bryce would be the person to play this role and offer other perspective, but somehow this "flamboyant" and "extravagant" freethinker ended to be the same judgy self-rightous closed off hypocrite as Lucas himself. Speaking about hypocrisy, I really wonder how Lucas - the middle-aged set in his ways conservative man disapproving of drugs and parties - even knows anyone from Tyler's clubbing world so he knows anything about tickets to parties Tyler bought months ago.. something you'd like to explain to a class, dear author?
All in all, a disappointment, all the bigger for the promising beginning. Wasted opportunity for a really great story.