Magnolia Parks: The Long Way Home

Magnolia Parks Universe #3

by Jessa Hastings

How many loves do you get in a lifetime? And are Magnolia and BJ each other's one and only?

It’s been nearly a year since everything happened between Magnolia Parks and BJ Ballentine on the steps of the Mandarin Oriental, and since then it seems like everything has changed.
Magnolia has a life in New York now and BJ appears to have finally let go and moved on.

But when they both wind up back in London and are thrust together once again, they find themselves asking their age-old How many loves do you actually get in a lifetime, and, most important—are they each other’s?

Genres: Romance, Contemporary Romance, Contemporary, Fiction, Audiobook, Second Chance, New Adult

Audible Audio

First published July 14, 2022

Reviews

[kendyl ʚ♡⃛ɞ (hiatus) · Rating 4 out of 5]

4/5 ★’s

⁀➷ ❝we’re in the stars, parks.❞

⁀➷ i rummage through the drawer in my mind as fast as i can to find the words to tell her that i’m coming for her, i’m on my way back, that this is just the long way home.

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･･:*.ೃ࿔⋆❀°

𝓼𝓹𝓸𝓲𝓵𝓮𝓻 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓮 𝓻𝓮𝓿𝓲𝓮𝔀

❥ 𝒶𝓁𝑒𝓍𝒶 𝓅𝓁𝒶𝓎:
❝holding on and letting go❞ by ross copperman

⤷ it’s everything you wanted, it’s everything you don’t. it’s one door swinging open and one door swinging closed.

literally bjparks in a fucking nutshell😭

i wanted to give this book a 4.5 star rating, but the ending is just so unforgivable. it has quite literally ruined every ounce of happiness i had left. it made me not want to write a review for this book because i wanted to move on to the next book and just be done with this one. but here i am…9 days after finishing this book, finally finding it in me to translate my feelings into words without wanting to stop and sob for hours on end. meanwhile: me sobbing while writing this review😀

❥ 𝓂𝓎 𝓉𝒽𝑜𝓊𝑔𝒽𝓉𝓈:
i’m so sad. so sad and i can’t even tell you guys why. i’m also mad. so mad because why couldn’t i just have hated the first book and never picked this series up ever again!? it would’ve saved me from so much pain and heartache. it’s constant too, the pain and heartache. you never get to feel happy while reading this series. at times you do, but it’s instantly ripped away from you. i hate how much i love it. the thought about reading mp3 makes me wanna throw up. there’s absolutely no preparing for the emotional damage that these books leave you with. the emptiness it leaves you with. even after saying all that…i 10/10 recommend this series🤸🏻‍♀️pain! fun! just want to let you guys know that this third book will make you SOB. i was literally ugly crying :) my bf was very concerned😀

❥ 𝓅𝓁𝑜𝓉:
opposed to the first book, you actually get to know more about bj’s and magnolia’s past. jessa really gutted me like a fucking fish with that information. when i tell you guys i was in disbelief. ughhhh it hurt so bad finding out what they’ve been through together🥺my babies. then PART 2!?!?? pls omg…part 2 had me questioning everything i swear. because this review is spoiler free, i can’t say anything more, but it was just so good😩to me it was good. i feel like people definitely either love it or hate it.

❥ 𝓌𝓇𝒾𝓉𝒾𝓃𝑔:
the ending was a big reason why i couldn’t give this book a higher rating. the writing was also a reason. like always…jessa’s writing is so so so beautiful. my issue was with how repetitive it felt to a point where things got a bit predictable like magnolia and bj’s relationship. i love them, but they are the most frustrating couple to read about. i ended up getting pretty annoyed with them. i just don’t really like how bjparks are written sometimes. especially their inner thoughts about each other. basically, they always talk about how well they can communicate with each other without even talking…but miscommunication is their biggest issue😭that’s really all i’ll say. it just gets frustrating because i want to see them win🥺i want love to win.

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･･:*.ೃ࿔⋆❀°

❥ 𝒷𝒿 𝒷𝒶𝓁𝓁𝒶𝓃𝓉𝒾𝓃𝑒

⁀➷ i look over at her more tenderly than i should, feel an old kind of missing her in my chest that i wish would just die but it can’t seem to take its last breath. every time it takes one it takes another and another, and it’s never a last breath. loving her like this is a kind of breathing that feels like dying.

i’m constantly mad at this man. getting a glimpse of his past…literally broke my heart. so not only am i mad at this man, but i’m also sad for him. i’m so conflicted when it comes to him because what he did to mags is what a guy has done to me, but his love for magnolia is so real and precious. so i really can’t compare him to the piece of shit i’ve dealt with. never in a million years would i have thought i’d root for a guy like bj, but he’s literally so lovable it’s ANNOYING. he’s even more lovable the more you read this book. his thoughts about magnolia will always get me🥹

❥ 𝓂𝒶𝑔𝓃𝑜𝓁𝒾𝒶 𝓅𝒶𝓇𝓀𝓈

⁀➷ this is what loving him does to me. it ruins me. makes me stupid, makes my body act like it’s broken.

as much as i love and adore mags…she also annoyed and frustrated me. it’s just what her and bj do. she can be such an airhead sometimes i swear, but to me…she’s impossible not to like. the effect that she has on so many characters in these books…is the same effect she has on me. although sometimes i feel the same way daisy feels about her hahaha. daisy>>>mags…ALWAYS! i need them to form a friendship, i feel it happening and i can’t wait🥹what mags went through at a young age…pain. i was not ready for that. i literally felt like i missed a whole chapter, i was so confused😩but yeah, my heart hurts so bad for her.

❥ 𝒷𝒿𝓅𝒶𝓇𝓀𝓈:
i just want to talk about the quotes i added under each character. do you guys see what bj and magnolia loving each other does to them!? it kills them and it kills me too. i can’t imagine doing this dance with the love of my life. i would simply not survive. the amount of therapy i’d need😭✋🏼makes my stomach turn just thinking about it.

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･･:*.ೃ࿔⋆❀°

❝are you sad, parks?❞
❝i’m always sad, beej.❞

I’M always sad. me. sad. all the fucking time. i swear no one can ever just be happy and i’m rooting for nothing but happiness for them🥺

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･･:*.ೃ࿔⋆❀°

the found family is so good and one of the very few things that makes me happy while reading these books🥹

➸ taura sax:
her friendship with magnolia!? i love it so much and i’m so happy about it especially since the things that happened in the first book😭i’m absolutely INVESTED with the little love triangle she’s got going on too. i need to know everything.

➸ bridget parks:
my all time favorite character in magnolia’s books. i love her relationship with everyone. she’s forever my comfort character. i’d jump into these books just to be best friends with her🥹🫂

➸ jonah hemmes:
this man is so funny i swear. i was mad at him when i started reading this book, but he’s just UGH. he’s a hemmes. he’s so lovable just like his brother christian🦋🦋🦋

➸ henry ballantine:
he is such a cutie. i absolutely adore him and the way he looks out for mags. ugh he’s such a good friend🥹i want him to have a book so bad along with the rest of these characters bc i just love them all sm😩

➸ daisychristian:
THEIR CRUMBS SPRINKLED THROUGHOUT THIS BOOK WERE EVERYTHING TO ME. i stg i love them with my entire heart. i will never shut up about them. the way daisy gives mags such a hard time is so funny to me and as she should💅🏼christian being so obviously in love with daisy still, made my heart skip so many beats.

➸ julian haites:
idc what anyone says, this man is perfection and i love him sm. he’s so hot🥵

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･･:*.ೃ࿔⋆❀°

❥ 𝒻𝒶𝓋𝑜𝓇𝒾𝓉𝑒 𝓆𝓊𝑜𝓉𝑒𝓈:
➛ i’d let the whole world down to keep magnolia afloat if i had to.
➛ the only plan i’d ever had for my future was magnolia parks.
➛ i could drown in the what ifs if i let myself—might as well. i’ll be drowning in her anyway for the rest of my life. happily, too. what a way to go. what a life.
➛ she could walk all over me, strangle me to death, and i wouldn’t notice. if the emerald eyes are out then i’m dying anyway.
➛ she’s the greatest drug on the planet. i’ve done them all and i know it for sure.
➛ i stare at her because i can’t help it. more beautiful than i know what to do with.
➛ my eyes fall down her face. forget what i’m doing. forget the day of the week, the month, the hour. what a face.
➛ all my best nights, all my worst ones, all are with him and i wonder if this is the point. this is what i’m swimming towards: not just in love with him but a whole wonderful, terrifying, beautiful, painful life with him.
➛ it’s that stupid hemmes smirk they do…so cute, so forgivable. their poor mother.
➛ ❝did they hurt you? did they touch you?❞

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･･:*.ೃ࿔⋆❀°

❥02/05/24
𝓅𝓇𝑒 𝓇𝑒𝓋𝒾𝑒𝓌:

no. absolutely not. there’s absolutely no fucking way that just happened. jessa tell me it’s a prank. girl you hate us. you HATE us. absolutely nothing could have prepared me for that and i never saw it coming.

what is it like to be happy? i forgot.

siff & shei…i hope you two enjoyed me suffering. rtc when i can feel something again.

❥ 01/24/24
my heart feels like it just went through a meat grinder, but clearly i can’t get enough pain so jessa, go ahead and do your thing🥲

also this book is thicker than the others, damn. thick with depression🤸🏻‍♀️🕳️

[Larissa Cambusano · Rating 5 out of 5]

what the absolute fuck 😃

here are some scattered thoughts since im currently in no state to write a review:
bjparks supremacy always.
im a julian haites stan first, human second.
bridget hard carried. a queen.

i’ve never had a book make me so angry but so happy and also so sad but also make me laugh so much. all at once. if there’s one thing jessa hastings can do… is make u feel emotions. all of them!

[sheena · Rating 3 out of 5]

FINALLY someone sees a therapist

[Clace · Rating 1 out of 5]

If i was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden and BJ and I had two bullets. I'd shoot BJ twice....

[Sabrina · Rating 5 out of 5]

“In every quiet whisper, every subtle and nuanced thread in the fabric of time, all the tiny ripples in the universe will tell you, that I’m actually just Parks’.”

hello, how’s the weather? the weather is fucked

Reread February 2024.This reread hit so much more than the first time around. it was a whole analysis on picking up the smallest details that I didn’t before. Bjparks are unquestionably the messiest dysfunctional characters I’ve ever read about so say what you will about them—but they've also felt so very real to read about. I'm so ready to see them establishing a healthier life together for good as it was heading that way but also not ready to experience all the emotions that will be felt getting there ❤️‍🩹

The absolute torture, pain and beauty that this book because when I tell you this book and these characters put me through so much.. I didn’t know what I was getting into but I loved all the good and ugly here. It seems jessa laced these books with something. am I obsessed? Yes, it’s fun painful here. It’s honestly shocking how MP includes mostly everything I’d hate in a book but i couldn’t help but devour it here. It was impossible not to feel every emotion and this book took a complete spin in being the same yet so different from mp1. the storylines here compared to there were much more fleshed out

“It's been one of the great burdens of my adult life knowing that I love him and he loves me and we just cannot for the life of us figure out how to be together. Needs me? I'm not so sure, but loves me? I've always known that.”

magnolia left London to cope as she knew best after the events that took place before. However, once she returns to London clearly things have changed. The constant question begs to be answered here—how many loves do you get in a life time? Many or just the one. I couldn’t have imagined the shift in things getting more real, more intense, more emotional and memories and pain from the past would be pronounced here.

No spoilers just plenty of thoughts

“I can’t control how you see me, but I can control how I will be seen. And you will only ever see me very put together. You don’t need to know about the parts of me that aren’t.”

There was a different feel to magnolia here that I loved to my surprise. Here you get to know just a part of what’s molded her into the character we all know and it made me empathize and root for her. Of course, I wanted to slap her for clarity when having to endure her back-and-forth choices, but a part of me enjoyed knowing bj knew how she felt. here you begin to see the many layered parts to her come together that she shows and hides. her inability to move forward is comprehensible as is and considering what she’s been through can mess you up if you don’t take time to process and heal from it—instead of running away which has evidently been her safeguard. Her humor and wit never failed to feed me. She had me completely entertained with the things she’d say and do 😂 Not to mention, the petty side to her which bj referred to as his favorite sparring partner: petty parks I honestly cannot wait to see the evolved person i know she has the potential to grow into and learning to trust herself by going to therapy as she navigates her new reality that allows her to confront everything she’s buried deep.

“I don’t know the worst parts of you.” I ran my thumb over her scar. “I just know you, Parks.”

for some, it can feel triggering to accept what bj did as his choices and decisions were quite questionable. I was not at all impressed with him especially after what he did and how he acted. But here.. I was surprised to find myself rooting for him as I am now. If he didn’t own up to his actions and wasn’t as aware as he was—we wouldn’t be here. I understood the reason behind his actions and all I can say is an action like that shouldn’t be excused and he recognizes this—but I’m aware triggers can manifest so unexpectedly. I do hope this is touched upon further. However, I did appreciate the realistic and little growth he managed to show when it didn’t feel like it backtracked. He still got on my nerves here but not in the same way as before. his willingness to work through reaching common ground for himself and magnolia is apparent and I know he loves her while also knowing the part he’s played in hurting her because of being hurt himself. The few chapters before this ended gave me hope in the growth I know he’ll deliver on further

”Did you ever imagine it?" she cuts me off. "That we'd be the ones who'd hurt each other more than anyone else?”

bjparks by all means aren’t perfect and most of us already know that. They’re aren’t the embodiment of a healthy relationship for the majority of this but two people that are proof of “hurt people, hurt people” and as you’re reading you’re left there unable to fathom the push and pull and jabs they’d throw at each other as it continuously felt like they got off on hurting each other in knowing how to rile each other up. all of it made me want to throw my book because every time we’d get moments of bliss—they both had to go and ruin it 😐 it was entertaining yet painful. during those moments it seemed like they had shown more growth but then boom things reverted back. In this book, you are presented with two people who love each other but cannot for the life of them get things right because they’re both too prideful and distrusting with each other.

“But we are in love, he and I.” Gestures between us. “Oh.” Frowns more. “But we have some toxic traits,” she concedes all rueful and I just want to kiss her.” You see?

There’s something about two people being aware of their toxic traits that makes me root for them especially as they genuinely want to change that and while questionable feelings can ensue— you are repeatedly and unequivocally reminded of all the things they've been through; all the bad moments and all memories of them when they were at their best and this book doesn’t shy away from acknowledging that. It’s this book that you see just how intertwined they are and their shared years of things that tie them together until something along the way taints those ties. Both of them delaying the inevitable so many times gave me such a headache lol I could say more but ultimately that they’re human and show that here with all their faults and stupid choices but are much aware of it all

“We’re in the stars, parks”

Some of my favorite moments between them have to be: The walk and that phone call. the willow tree/dec 3rd, the tattoos he has (please look up the fan art for it), the nostalgic yet profound conversations they had when they were good, the hotel scene, the day trip and of course towards the end. Essentially, anytime they were good I was good and I cherished that so much

“What are you smiling at?" She shook her head. "We're fucked." I sniffed a laugh.
"Yeah, but that's kind of what I want-to be fucked. By you, with you, over you-" I shrugged. "Forever."

Henry and bridge continue to be the voice of reason in wanting bj and magnolia to get their a shit together by calling them out on their bs which is appreciated. best sibling duo. I absolutely adored them both and I especially deeply connected to magnolias relationship with bridget because of how close they are given that their parents failed them in so many ways growing up but never each other. Also, taura?! all I’ll say is she’s a real one and I also was surprised to love her with her Pokémon collector self lol

“Not to make this about myself—” She gives me a little look. “But I did say trauma bonds with you two, didn’t I? Called it a mile off.”

Bridge was onto something because the connection between them ran so deeply

It honestly bothered me when she had to question who was trying to protect her with what happened and who was making sure she was fine as no one really did. And Julian? Idk how to feel about him. I still need to read Daisy haites books but it’s inevitable to not place blame on him

I wish I could erase the last chapter from my brain. It was so cruel and heartbreaking and I was not prepared for that 😔 The words in that last page gutted me and the last few chapters should be named the calm before the storm with how grim it got.

This book made me feel so much and I fear it’s taken over my life so I do have to say that this one was more of a rollercoaster of emotions. Although, it did have its humorous moments for some relief amidst all the stress so at least there’s that.

I tend to have a lot of thoughts and my brain begs for them to be released so if you made it this far—thank you for staying to read all my lengthy thoughts. Also, thank you Jess <3 for dealing with my chaotic updates because bjparks have a special place in my heart now besides jessa by introducing us to her imaginary friends

magnolia parks 1 review

there were so many highlighted moments and quotes from this but these are just a few

“How’s the weather, Parks?” He beams up at me. “Oh.” I stare down at him, wide eyed. “It’s looking to be quite fine—” “Just quite?” I roll my eyes. “Eternally sunny, then.”“Oh—” He grimaces. “Can’t promise that. Storms always come, they have to—brings balance.” Loved this moment

“You can’t just life-trust me. It’s got to be heart trust me too.”

“All my best nights, all my worst ones, all are with him and I wonder if this is the point. This is what I'm swimming towards: not just in love with him but a whole wonderful, terrifying, beautiful, painful life with him.”

“It's gotten easier over the years. Funny with pain, how it propagates itself, grows into you, becomes a part of you. Shapes you a bit.”

“I’m fine finally, I’m doing good, she comes back and wears fucking lilac, the twat.” lmao

“I have all these ties to him. First boyfriend, first kiss, first love, first time, first everything, really. How he was my teacher and my partner in so many key life areas. My best friend and my family and my pillow and my quilt.”

“You can love someone and have it just be there, a part of you, and still have a completely functional life" She pauses and gives me a long look. "Even if it's a life without them."

[Pavana · Rating 1 out of 5]

There was no reason for this shit to be 80 something chapters. If only they went to therapy.

[Iqra · Rating 5 out of 5]

*chokes on a sob*
*points finger aggressively*

Jessa I will NEVER forgive u for this ending 😭😭😭😭😭

Updated rtc when I feel sane enough 😫

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Reading this universe is like riding a bike and then you take a break from it for a month. But even during that break you don’t forget the way it made you feel;
𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐞𝐤𝐬,
𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐞𝐠𝐬,
𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐚𝐬𝐬 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠,
𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐦𝐨𝐨𝐭𝐡 𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐝,
𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐮𝐦𝐩𝐲 𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐝,
𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐮𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐛𝐫𝐮𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐬,
𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒅𝒆𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒕𝒐 𝒌𝒆𝒆𝒑 𝒈𝒐𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒏,
𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐣𝐨𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐫𝐢𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬…
But when you dust that bike off to ride again?? 𝗜𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘀 𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘃𝗲, 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝘀𝗺𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗰𝗼𝗹𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀, 𝘁𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘀𝗲 𝗳𝗮𝗺𝗶𝗹𝗶𝗮𝗿 𝗮𝗰𝗵𝗲𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗻𝘀. 𝙸𝚔 𝙸’𝚖 𝚠𝚊𝚡𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚙𝚘𝚎𝚝𝚒𝚌𝚜 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝙸 𝚌𝚊𝚗’𝚝 𝚑𝚎𝚕𝚙 𝚖𝚢𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏. 𝙸𝚝’𝚜 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 *𝙘𝙝𝙚𝙛𝙨 𝙠𝙞𝙨𝙨*

The ending fractured my heart, ripped it out of my chest and stomped on it for good measure. *𝙫𝙞𝙤𝙡𝙚𝙣𝙩 𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙𝙚𝙧 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙙𝙮𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙨𝙤𝙗𝙗𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙚𝙣𝙨𝙪𝙚𝙨* (;´༎ຶٹ༎ຶ`)

it’s that bad fr. I’m shattering to pieces with every page and then as soon as I collect two measly pieces, they burst into flames by the next page. So yeah… it is most definitely that bad.

𝗕𝗲𝗲𝗷 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝗯𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝗿𝗲𝗱𝗲𝗲𝗺𝗲𝗱, 𝗴𝘂𝘆𝘀. 𝗔𝘁 𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝘁 𝗶𝗺𝗼. I’m not saying what he did was right but I’m saying that after what got revealed in this book, I can understand why he did it. I forgave him for what he did but that doesn’t mean I have to be okay about how he dealt with the situation. He was wrong for cheating. Simple as.

>>> *𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐭!!! don’t come after me lol it’s just fiction and not that serious* <<<

𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐣 𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞?? That was such a huge plot point of the story and they’ve not even circled back to it properly. It’s as if parks just erased the fact that it even happened in her head?? Like hello?! Tf??

I feel like this thing just got dismissed so quickly and my heart is crying for beej bc he’s not getting the closure he needs for what really happened that night. They didn’t even have a proper discussion or anything which killed me.

𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗗𝗲𝗰𝗲𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝟯𝗿𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗮 𝗵𝘂𝗴𝗲 𝗱𝗲𝗮𝗹? I'm actually proper happy she got closure on that. This bomb was dropped so casually i was like WAIT A DAMN MINUTE- TF?! LETS REWIND THAT SHIT. I literally stopped hating her for everything she did and all... 𝘽𝙪𝙩 𝙞𝙩’𝙨 𝙗𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚 𝙞𝙩 𝙙𝙞𝙧𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙡𝙮 𝙞𝙣𝙫𝙤𝙡𝙫𝙚𝙙 𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙬𝙝𝙞𝙘𝙝 𝙞𝙨 𝙬𝙝𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙨𝙚 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙗𝙡𝙚𝙢𝙨 𝙜𝙤𝙩 𝙨𝙤 𝙢𝙪𝙘𝙝 𝙥𝙧𝙞𝙤𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙮 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙗𝙤𝙤𝙠. 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩'𝙨 𝙟𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙗𝙪𝙡𝙡𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙩.

LIKE HELLO? 𝐁𝐞𝐞𝐣 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐨!! Just bc it wasn’t parks that went through it doesn’t mean it should be dismissed so easily wtf??? I think Jessa does this on purpose to make us feel like mags is really important and special or wtv the fuck it is. But wtf! Shoving BJ's trauma to the side and reinforcing parks’ trauma time and again is so unfair to him and his feelings. Just telling us that he went to therapy and has processed everything doesn’t change the fact that he still felt all that and went through something devastating. And for magnolia to keep slapping the cheating thing in his face even though she knew the truth was honestly really frustrating.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐮𝐩 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐡𝐢𝐦𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐟𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐈 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐭 🤌✨

Also the ending of part one?? It was so annoying. 𝐁𝐉 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝’𝐯𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐢𝐭 𝐬𝐨 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫. 𝐇𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐦𝐧 𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐟𝐟𝐬. But I mean 𝙢𝙖𝙜𝙣𝙤𝙡𝙞𝙖 𝙞𝙨𝙣’𝙩 𝙨𝙩𝙪𝙥𝙞𝙙 𝙚𝙞𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧?? 𝙎𝙝𝙚 𝙝𝙖𝙨 𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙤𝙬𝙣 𝙗𝙧𝙖𝙞𝙣. And her blaming him for it all is ridiculous. She’s not innocent in any of this. 𝗦𝗵𝗲 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝘀𝗵𝗲 𝗶𝘀 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝘀𝗮𝘆𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝗵𝗲 𝗻𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗴𝗶𝗿𝗹𝗳𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝗮𝘀 𝗮 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻(??) 𝗶𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗮𝗻 𝗲𝘅𝗽𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗼𝗿 𝗮 𝘃𝗮𝗹𝗶𝗱 𝗲𝘅𝗰𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗯𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 “𝗶𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗰𝗲𝗻𝘁“ 𝗼𝗿 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗱 𝗹𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝗮𝗰𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗜’𝗹𝗹 𝗱𝗶𝗲 𝗼𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗵𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗼𝗼, 𝗯𝘆𝗲𝗲 <3

⚠️ 𝐒𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐫⚠️

She could’ve stopped him. He could’ve stopped her. She knew he had a girlfriend and then when he kept saying that he had one, parks felt like it was a rejection. Yet she still wanted for him to do it despite that. 𝘼𝙣𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙞𝙩 𝘿𝙊𝙀𝙎 𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙥𝙚𝙣, 𝙨𝙝𝙚’𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙧𝙮?? *violent side eye*

⚠︎︎ 𝐒𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 ⚠︎︎

But OMDSSSS THE *ACTUAL* ENDING BEFORE THE FAKE ENDING WAS PURE BLISS. I WAS SO FKING HAPPY 😭😭💗
They’re literally so amazing when they’re together I love both of them. Magnolia and BJ’s faults suddenly evaporate when they’re with each other and ugh I just want to see them happy for more than three seconds. Like ITS NOT THAT HARD JESSA?! 🔪🔪

I was shipping Bridget and Henry SO HARD I wanted it to happen so bad 😭😭 they’re so perfect for each other. They’re both bright, clever, funny, lovable, caring and the way they’d look after each other ☹️💔 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝘀𝗲𝗱 𝗼𝗽𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁𝘂𝗻𝗶𝘁𝘆. Especially the scene when they were re-enacting how BJParks look at each other THAT WAS WHEN MY SHIP WAS IN THE WORKS.
𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗮𝘆 𝗺𝘆 𝗯𝗿𝗮𝗶𝗻 𝗺𝗮𝗽𝗽𝗲𝗱 𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗱𝗮𝗺𝗻 𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗽 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗝𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗮 𝗵𝗮𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝗽𝗼𝗸𝗲 𝗵𝗼𝗹𝗲𝘀 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗮𝗶𝗹𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘃𝗶𝗼𝗹𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗹𝘆 𝗺𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝗮𝘁 🔪🔪

LMAOAOAO EVERY TIME THEY WOULD CALL JULIAN A GANG LORD IM ALWAYS LIKE BRO STOP EMBARRASSING YOURSELF 💀✋ and 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐚 𝐠𝐚𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐨𝐨𝐨 𝐛𝐚𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐤𝐢𝐝𝐧𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬/𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐬/𝐦𝐮𝐫𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐫𝐬/𝐝𝐫𝐮𝐠 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐫𝐬/𝐦𝐚𝐟𝐢𝐚. 𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐩𝐥𝐬. 𝐒𝐭𝐨𝐩 𝐢𝐭.

And I still see ppl loving Julian. HOW?! Even after this ending, I mean pls it’s not that hard to figure it out (𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘰𝘧𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘣𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴𝘯’𝘵 𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘋𝘏1)…

I realise I’ve just complained the entire time but don’t think about that. Look at the rating. That’s more important 😌

𝗦𝗶𝗱𝗲 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲:
I would pay in LIMBS for BJ’s letters to parks in the year they were apart 😭

Also, I’m sorry but Jessa can’t even make separate personalities for shit. Half of them are all the same person 💀💀
And her descriptions for the extras are the same. For guys, it’s always Blue eyes black hair tall with pink lips. I’m like 😃🔫

𝗦𝗼𝗻𝗴𝘀: 🎧
I’ll add them on my reread

𝗙𝗮𝘃 𝗤𝘂𝗼𝘁𝗲𝘀:

It’s in the comments section 😭
“Damn you character limit!“

***
Update: it broke the scale. I’m shattered. I’m broken. I’m BEYOND fixable. I AM A WRECK.

WHAT WAS THE NEED JESSA?! WHAT WAS THE FUCKING NEED????? 😭🔪

Rtc when I’m emotionally stable- 🥰🔫

***

Let’s see on a scale of 1-10 how broken I become when i finish this… (Mum come get me I’m scared 🤣)

[X · Rating 1 out of 5]

miserable. so miserably painful to read.

god it’s just the same cycle of petty immature toxic bullshit on a loop that could be solved in like 2 minutes if magnolia & bj bothered to have a proper mature conversation for once in their empty lives. miscommunication is the big trope in this book and it’s miserable and torturously drawn out to read. this book was so repetitive and the same lines kept being used over and over and over like it rly could’ve been reduced by like 70%. so many pages and for what???

also as w every book in this series/universe, there are many typos/grammatical mistakes and extensive run-ons that can make it quite frustrating to read. also still skipping over all the clothing brand/fabric/blahblah clothing details. far too many too frequently and my non-fashion interested self can’t be bothered since it’s not like i can create an image w the descriptions anyway, and i’m far too lazy to google every damn description

magnolia only gets worse w every book i read. how does she continue to get dumber, pettier, and more shallow/self absorbed over time??? she’s just such an airhead it’s so cringey to read about, and it pisses me off how she can never take what she dishes out to everyone else, demands everyone bend and cater to her every whim(AND THEY DO IT???). the second anyone even slightly offends her by calling her out on her shit she gets defensive and bolts, her running from bj really started pissing me off. also her innate lack of ability to take responsibility for anything. also her weird invasive behavior to try and make daisy like her was also just Not The Vibe™️. LORD i still cannot for the life of me figure out why any/all the guys fall for her because she is so bratty. i mean fr how does she string up a line of guys that includes the richest man in england, his bff who happens to be hollywood’s top grossing actor, his bff’s roommate who happens to be like some record breaking skateboarder or whatever, and england’s biggest crime boss/gang lord????? speaking of england’s biggest crime boss/gang lord, i really wanna highlight how CRINGE her naivety towards him/what he does/his career was. i mean girl was so ready to bury her head in the sand in willful ignorance of who he is despite warnings from *checks list* EVERYONE INCLUDING SAID GANG LORD HIMSELF it was honestly embarrassing. major secondhand embarrassment from magnolia pretty much every time i read about her.

bj isn’t any better, but he also had the addition of a shitty gf aka jordan but i cant even decide who to feel bad for in their sham of a relationship bc they’re both so shit. i mean god it was so bland to read about him using her and his weird shitty excuses for being an ass even when he knew better.

magnolia/bj are really just such a ridiculous toxic codependent nightmare mess of a relationship that really doesnt need to happen ever again and probably shouldve long been severed years ago, but we all already know bj is end game so it is what it is i guess. they’re just so fcking REACTIVE and DRAMATIC all the DAMN TIME and it’s the same old story on a loop each time too like they cant at the least fight about something NEW for once at the least if they INSIST on fighting??? a moment of silence for all the guys and girls that magnolia/bj strung along and screwed over along the way.

only rly cared about the side characters, came for the daisy/christian crumbs and the jonah/taura/henry throuple, which i think sorta devolved into jonah/bianca(was that her name??)

[Mel · Rating 5 out of 5]

LORD, SHALL I NEVER KNOW PEACE????😭🤧😭🤧

👁️👁️: literally me rn with the ending

[lulu · Rating 5 out of 5]

i knew this was going to happen i felt it in my bones. i wanted to be so wrong BUT HERE WE ARE. i will never forgive you jessa hastings. mark my words.

im actually gonna be sick bc what does this all mean? i need answers. right this instant.

WHY HAVE CERTAIN PPL BEEN MIA RIGHT AS ALL THIS SHIT IS GOING ON ??? I NEED TO KNOW. NOW.

lets not even talk about how much i cried during this book. and not just one two tears im talking full on body shakes, need to take a break bc i cant see, the pain is too much and the tears wont stop. embarrassing. get a grip.

moving on, magnolia & bj. bj & magnolia. i can't imagine one without the other. they are tethered to each other. the way they speak about their love will forever touch me. it messes with my mind that i love them together and that i root for them because i understand why others find their relationship so terrible. and it's true, it is. but when i read about them, i just can't help but desperately need them to fix their problems and find a way to be together.

baxter james ballentine is so heart eyes. the way he describes his love for magnolia? she won. THE FORECAST TATTOOS HAD ME WEAK IN THE KNEES 🥹🌩️⛅️☀️

magnolia annoyed me for about 90% of this book but she’s also somehow so cute, charming and unapologetically herself at the same time and i cant help but love her, faults and all. i will defend her anyway of the week.

i have questions about julian after that ending tho bc i don’t trust him now 🤨
also side note he had her PASSING OUT? what? no bc how in the hell 😭 i’m gonna need the play by play. jk but not really

i don’t even wanna talk about what happened at the end. im staying in denial for the foreseeable future. for all intents and purposes, this is an 81 chapter book. im ripping out every page that comes after.

[Marianna Moore · Rating 5 out of 5]

BRB jumping out my window for the 10th time into my own personal bucket of tears.

Tell me how each book progressively gets more and more emotionally damaging??? I’m so unwell, I said it before that I think this series is going to kill me… consider me dead. I really and truly have never felt this many intense emotions while reading a series besides boys of Tommen and I LIVE FOR THE PAIN.

Holy hell this book sucked the life out of me.

I need to start off by mentioning my babies because they are my favorites and can do no wrong… Christian and Daisy yes I’m talking about you. I ate up the little crumbs we got of them and spent the whole time missing them. I might be a little obsessed. Heartbroken Christian broke me. I will not stand for it! And Jessa is just going to casually mention that Daisy’s with Tiller?? No. He is now enemy number 1 in my book. Also WHERE DID YOU TAKE DAISY JULIAN?!!!!

JULIAN HAITES. I can’t stand how much I love this man. He is everything. BUT GOD I NEED YOU TO RUN AS FAR AWAY FROM MAGNOLIA PARKS AS POSSIBLE!!! However I fear he did not heed my advice because it is so obvious that he’s in love with her and sir she is going to RUIN YOU! This man deserves someone that is going to love him fully and always choose him first and Magnolia will simply never be that person. This is why I will never ship Julian and Magnolia. Because for Magnolia it will always be Bj, there is no world where the two of them don’t exist together. And to be completely honest I don’t think Magnolia deserves Julian, not in the slightest. I’m over here trying to figure out how magnolia has all these men falling at her feet like the math isn’t mathing. I simply will not survive watching him fall in love with her from his POV it is going to absolutely eat away at what’s left of my soul. And after magnolia breaks his heart because it’s magnolia and that’s what she does… I swear to god Jessa if you don’t give this angel of a man a happy ending with all the love he deserves I will simply never recover.

So many traumatic things happened in this book that I’m still trying to process it all. Listen I know people have their issues with this series and I understand that it’s not for everyone but in this book all of the puzzle pieces came together showing you that nothing was ever as it seemed in the beginning and my god did it break me. Bj absolutely ripped my heart in two and I cried so much with him and for him throughout this whole book. Learning the reasons behind his actions didn’t justify them but allowed me to accept them for what they were and move on from them. I care so much for Bj as a character even when I couldn’t STAND HIM in the beginning and the growth we got from him in this book was so healing. Therapy Bj has me feeling like a proud mom!!! His redemption arc has only just begun and I cannot wait for more! Don’t let that fool you though like he was still an absolute idiot at times in this book BUT HES TRYING 😭😭

Magnolia girl…. Honestly how Daisy feels about Magnolia is how I feel about Magnolia. By the end of this book she did start to slowly… very slowly wiggle her annoyingly peppy and egotistical ass into my heart… slightly! But I weirdly think that’s why I like her so much as a character. I love it when characters I hate in the beginning worm their way into my good graces. Most of the time I’ll find her entirely unrelatable but in this book she started to show more of why she is the way she is that made me feel more connected to her even if that connection is like finding phone service in the desert…. Also this girls lack of accountability for her actions throughout this entire book infuriated me to NO END. I was WAITING for someone to call her out on it and I was so happy when therapy Bj finally did because pop off you both treated each other like shit TOGETHER and she needed to hear it. She finally started to show a little self awareness in the end. But then everything went to shit and my heart is hurting for her.

The way magnolia and Bjs love for one another has imprinted on my soul in its own toxic fucked up way should be studied in a lab. I feel their chemistry and soul deep connection in my bones, the pain that their love comes with has become my pain. And I’m an addict for it, this is the type of angst I didn’t know I lived for. The back and forth gives me a headache and for some reason I simply don’t care at all. The type of love Jessa Hastings writes is not like any type of love you have ever read before, you may think you have… but I promise you haven’t. There is nothing like it and nothing will ever compare or be able to make me feel this deeply.

I truly cannot even explain how these two make me feel. Magnolia and Bj are the definition of soulmates. One doesn’t exist without the other and nobody can tell me otherwise.

That ending. No. Nope. No. Jail. Straight to jail. I was in the fetal position crying for an hour. I was proud of myself for not crying for a whole hour today. The emotions are nonstop and I know I sound dramatic but… well just read it and you’ll get it.

In conclusion…. This is without a doubt my new favorite series and I am permanently changed by it. I will never recover and I don’t want to.

Favorite quotes:
“He laughs and for some reason it sounds like I’m ringing the doorbell of the home I grew up in.”

“I look over at her more tenderly than I should, feel an old kind of missing her in my chest that I wish would just die but it can’t seem to take its last breath. Every time it takes one it takes another and another, and it’s never a last breath. Loving her like this is a kind of breathing that feels like dying.”

“She’s crying for me in a way I’ve never done for myself and I love her for it.”

“In another life I reckon I could have loved you.” “In another life I would have let you.”

“She knows she looks too beautiful to be a normal part of the world. Everyone else on the planet is a pavement and she’s the flower growing out of the crack in it.”

“That’s how we love each other. That’s what our love feels like. Battered and bruised, but the only thing in this world I’ve ever clung on to for dear life is the boy here in front of me.”

“She thinks we’re in the stars but I just think she’s the current of everything and I’m always just drifting. . . Floating home to her.”

[Natilie Bell · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.25/5 ✧˚.🎀༘⋆

WHat do you mean what do you mean what do you mean? what? do you mean? is this real life ok

reading log ୨ৎ

10/06/2024 12:25pm ୨ৎ
i've put this book aside for 2 months which is very unlike me but now I'm at 80% and I gotta admit whilst I am enjoying it it's so incredibly frustrating to watch this dance, more than the first one I'd say

19/04/2024 5:02PM ୨ৎ
oh my goodness guess what time it is? a whole 2 WEEKS later i am picking this back up because i am less heartbroken and can tolerate the toxicity (probably), still, fuck you bj.

04/04/2024 6:57PM ୨ৎ
okay i may not be finishing this book today, turns out going through your own heartbreak makes this way harder to read

04/04/2024 9:58AM ୨ৎ
i am determined to finish this book today - i just can't do it all in one sitting because i physically feel sad and their pain when i read this that i have to put it down

03/04/2024 10:03 AM ୨ৎ

pg 90. oh my god. okay. i’m heartbroken. poor things. i empathise with them fully. i still don’t like either of them, but my heart aches for them ):

03/04/2024 ୨ৎ

my heart is churning i'm already obsessed. "how's the weather parks" will get me every time. but what's up with that guy being named jack-jack? the baby from the incredibles has no business being in this toxic environment.

︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶︶⠀୨♡୧⠀︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶︶

pre-reading ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ

TL:DR - i have returned from my hiatus to get right back into the toxic enthralling world of magnolia parks (she still isn't no daisy haites). i'm super excited to be reading again! i have high expectations for this book and will be a harsh critic.

i'm a chronically ill girly, so I've found myself admitted to the hospital on a long stay. good news is, there's lots of time for reading and catching up with the book world <3

[Ri ♡ · Rating 5 out of 5]

“In every quiet whisper, every subtle and nuanced thread in the fabric of time, all the tiny ripples in the universe will tell you, that I’m actually just Parks’.”

🎧 'The Great War' by Taylor Swift

I know this book and that ending will forever haunt me in my life and both in good and bad ways. No words will be enough to describe how much I love this book and Bjparks. If MP1 was toxic and insane then this book is pure torture and just pain and destruction. If MP1 broke my heart and then this book completely shattered it in million pieces which I am not even sure will ever be able to put it back together.

“I have all these ties to him. First boyfriend, first kiss, first love, first time, first everything, really. How he was my teacher and my partner in so many key life areas. My best friend and my family and my pillow and my quilt.”

The book was beautiful, soul-crushing and heart-aching but so full of hope and love. I knew what this book would do to me but Jessa did her absolute worst in her book. She literally stomped on my heart many times with the she wrote this book. This is definitely my favourite book of the series because it's just so beautiful and exquisite. The writing has improved a lot and it's still just as beautiful and as engrossing. I don't know how Jessa does and what she puts in her books and the pages that I'm an addict for Magnolia and Beej and these books.

“Love fucks you up, man. In what world, what shit has to happen between you and someone that you miss just being able to stare at them, because I’ve missed staring at her.”

“I’ll wear it like a badge of honour forever that he loved me first, that he loved me at all. Have you ever had a love like that? I always felt like the luckiest girl to have his eyes on me, his hands on me. And his mouth. I love that mouth.”

There was a lot to unpack in this book—old painful memories, more trauma, new revelations, more lies and trust issues and everything that never made sense in MP1 about Bjparks has been dealt here in detail. The descriptions of loss and love and grief were way TOO real and heartbreaking to read. The love they have for each other, the loss of life they shared, the life they never had the chance to experience, the lives they destroyed in the process of getting back to each other—every painful and toxic thing finally makes so much sense. Why they are the way they are and why they do all the things they do to each other and with each other.

“Do you think I’m crazy?” she asked, quietly.
“No.” I shook my head. “I think you’re the best.”
“Even though you know the worst parts of me?”
“I don’t know the worst parts of you.” I ran my thumb over her scar. “I just know you, Parks.”

➸ 𝙈𝙖𝙜𝙣𝙤𝙡𝙞𝙖 𝙋𝙖𝙧𝙠𝙨

I love this girl so much and I will forever be her apologist no matter how bad her decisions can be sometimes and no matter how she hurts people when she goes back to Beej. I also see a lot myself in her in the way she wants to feel accepted, needed and loved when someone complements her for her fashion style or just tell her how much she means to them. She pissed me off a lot of the times in this book but it was real and everything she felt was realistic and NORMAL. She doesn't know how to be alone because of Beej and she can't stop destroying their relationship/friendship because of Beej and how she can't trust him. She never got the time to move on from the fact that Beej cheated on her because she never knew for years who he cheated with and that's NOT her fault. She's still grieving him and the life they lost, she still loves him and wants him but she just can't bring herself to trust him and that's all Beej's fault. I wish she gets into therapy like Beej because I know she has potential of being better and she need it to talk about her deep rooted fears of not being loved and trust issues. She's been through a lot in her life and the way Jessa threw another bomb on her heart is just downright criminal.

“He laughs and for some reason it sounds like I’m ringing the doorbell of the home I grew up in.”

➸ 𝘽𝙅 𝘽𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙚

I'm joining Baxter James Ballentine Apologist club for forever. He really worked on himself in this book. He went to therapy, wrote her letters which she didn't read 🥲, told Parks everything about his issues, traumas and insecurities and what happened to him when he was a kid and it all broke my heart. He didn't deserve that and no it's not an excuse to him cheating on Parks and it will never be but atleast we finally have answers as to why he always tried to drown himself with sex and booze. I was rooting for him so badly in this book after knowing how he's trying to be better for himself but also for Parks and he fucked up a lot of the times like before but atleast he's self-aware that he's a fucked up and need to work on himself more. He's growth and development is slow but also realistic because I don't expect him to just wake up and be the best version of himself one day. He still infuriates me but I loved him wholeheartedly and unapologetically in this book. There were a lot of times he started the chain of misscommunications between Parks and him and it was so annoying because he was just denying the fact he'll never be enough for Parks when all she ever wanted was him. I also don't get why he hesitated so much to break-up with Jordan when Parks came back home. I think he was just using his relationship with Jordan as a shield whenever Parks come and fucked up his life again. One thing I know for sure that this man will become the best version of himself one day but he just needs more time.

“She thinks we’re in the stars but I just think she’s the current of everything and I’m always just drifting… Floating home to her.”

╰┈➤ 𝙈𝙖𝙜𝙣𝙤𝙡𝙞𝙖 & 𝙋𝙖𝙧𝙠𝙨 🐝🎀

“We’re in the stars, Parks.”

How many loves do you get in a lifetime? For Bjparks, it's just one.

I love them with all my damned heart. You think things get better for them in this book after all the shocking truths were revealed in MP1? IT DID NOT GET BETTER! It only got worse. Sure, Parks now has reasons and explanations about Beej's self-sabotaging behaviour but she still can't trust him and he don't know how to trust her for not leaving him alone when he fucks up everytime. It's just a toxic-destructive-painful-heartbreaking mess. Moving on from their past life and this toxic situation they created is not possible because they love each other more than they love themselves. Beej was doing fine until Parks came back and Beej cheating on Jordan is not just Beej's fault. Yes, he could've stopped it but so as Parks.

“All my best nights, all my worst ones, all are with him and I wonder if this is the point. This is what I’m swimming towards: not just in love with him but a whole wonderful, terrifying, beautiful, painful life with him.”

I could hate them for making these many mistakes but I also know they are just HUMANS who make mistakes because it's easy to hurt the other person than trusting them or forgiving them for the way they hurt them first. They showed some growth by talking about their past traumas as well as sharing their feelings, recognising their mistakes and hurt but they still have a lot to deal with. The way to home is long because they have to untangle themselves from all regrets and pain they put each other through. I loved reading about their past relationship and why they have this 'trauma bonds' relationship. I never expected it to be painful and trust me when I say I was sobbing when I get to know the full story why they love December 3rd so much 🥺❤️‍🩹 The 'I love you' and 'I miss you' broke me everytime. Loved their small nostalgic moments where they were reminiscing about their past and Beej showing Parks his new tattoos and them talking on phone but also missing them.

“You promise you love me?” He nods. “Infinitely.”
“And you want to be with me?” I frown. “Forever.”

I hate how stubborn they are for not waving the white flag first because they both think that the other hurt them the most. Why can't they just accept that there will never be another Parks for Beej and another Beej for Parks. The magnetic push and pull they have that will always bring them together in each other's orbit no matter what they want. There's no other word to describe them except star-crossed Lovers. I liked that they are taking things slow as friends and are now developing trust and love again that was lost for years between them.

“We’ve returned from war. That’s how we love each other. That’s what our love feels like. Battered and bruised, but the only thing in this world I’ve ever clung on to for dear life is the boy here in front of me.”

— 𝙎𝙞𝙙𝙚 𝘾𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙨 —

➛ Julian: I love him but he deserves better than Parks. And I hate him for going in Beej mode on parks.

➛ Henry: Can Jessa just leave him alone and not bring him in just another one of her fucked up love triangles. He deserves better!

➛ Bridget: You will forever be my favourite girl of this series 🥺❤️

➛ Daisy: I loved her little friendship with Parks and the way Parks does his absolute best and worst to make Daisy like her lol.

➛ Christian: I wish we got more of him in this book and I am glad he and Parks are friends again.

➛ Jonah: I must say I liked him more in this book but I won't if he hurts Henry.

➛ Taura: One of the amazing characters in this series. I loved how selfless she is for her friends and how she's always there for Magnolia and Daisy.


The ending? Thankyou so much, Jessa for stabbing a knife in my heart and then stomping on it with you goddamn Gucci heels. I will forever hate you for that ending.



———————————
Breathe in, breathe out. I'm so scared right now but here we go again 🥲

[lila · Rating 4 out of 5]

“I don’t know the worst parts of you.” I ran my thumb over her scar. “I just know you, Parks.”

first of all, before i start with this review, i just wanna state this. i never expected to like magnoliabj together in any way, because generally i stay away from books with themes like this lmao (cheating, drama, miscommunication, etc.) it’s literally everything i hate thrown together in one book. so the fact that i enjoyed this? kind of insane, now that i think about it. 🫢 i was stuck between giving this 3 or 4 stars for a while because while this was messed up, i liked it so much more than both mp1 and dh1 and literally ate it up. so 4 stars it was.

the way i hate-loved this book. it made me feel so much — anger, pain, pure rage, hope (before it was snatched away from me 😔), heartbreak, frustration, but finally, so much love. magnolia and bj truly shared a love where i believe they’ll come back to each other after everything — and while they are toxic together, they’re also the best option for each other. they keep circling around each other but the thing is, in the end, their homes were each other. always. they’re never too far from each other’s minds and if that doesn’t scream soulmatery (albeit a very fucked up sort of soulmatery) then idk what does. the realness of their relationship, the constant back and forth in the not-communicating aspect, and the rawness of this drove me mad most of the time but i adore the fact that it also made me feel that much.

“But we are in love, he and I.” Gestures between us.
“Oh.”
Frowns more. “But we have some toxic traits,” she concedes all rueful and I just want to kiss her.

magnolia parks. my love. my queen. i like her so much more in this book than i ever did in the previous books because in this, she felt so much more real and like i could relate with her so much. her quirky habits. her vapidness. her insecurities and the way she masked them by getting attention. her wit and little comebacks had me gasping sometimes. and we stan a petty queen 💅 the way she got back at bj every time he hurt her was what had me loving her the most because to me, at least, in book one — the hurting seemed mostly one-sided. inside, yes, bj was hurting too, but i wanted magnolia to do more. but in this? her actions are completely justified by me and i loved her for everything she did 😌 the way she had all those men chasing after her? i’m crying she’s so precious fr and i just want her to be happy. 🥺

“What are you smiling at?” She shook her head. “We’re fucked.” I sniffed a laugh.
“Yeah, but that's kind of what I want—to be fucked. By you, with you, over you—” I shrugged. “Forever.”

bj ballentine. i have a hate-like relationship with him as of now. i can’t condone what he’s done nor can i excuse it, but i can appreciate the growth he’s trying to show after going through therapy and trying to actually work things out with magnolia and communicate. i will never be one of those people who’ll fully love him though; not after remembering everything he’s done. 😩

We’re fated. Woven into the tapestry of the universe, my name right next to hers. We’re in the stars.

magnoliabj. i’m literally getting a headache just thinking about them because they are so fucked up but i also like them, surprisingly enough? they were both such real characters and they just bounced off of each other, they truly were inevitable. they were kinda annoying about their communicating and how they never could try and understand the other pov 😭 why couldn’t one of them just step up and be the bigger person. but the way i truly see the potential of who they could be together in this: every little moment hit in this one. the way they were so interlinked. the tattoos. the willow tree. december 3rd. the phone calls. the lil convos they had chatting about the what-ifs and what they could have been had their hearts not been shattered and torn apart because of so many different things. ☹️ my heart actually ached and hurt so much reading those moments but i truly rooted for them together by the end, they deserve each other — their worst selves and their best selves. i can safely say they are made for each other.

henry, bridge and jonah. they crack me up. i love seeing all their banter and the way they bicker but then make up, the way they all either try vying for magnolia’s favor or try knocking some sense into her pretty little head lol it’s actually so funny!! and that ending, of course. criminal. i can’t not mention it and i better get closure for that.



julian haites. pls someone tell why this man had a 180 turn in this book from dh1? it was so weird. after that ending to dh, i went in fully expecting to hate him but i also felt for him so much in this because he also became one of those people just craving magnolia’s favor and it was kinda painfully funny and sad at the same time for me lmao. and i actually liked how tender he was with magnolia because him rooting for bj and her even though he was in love with her himself? that’s true selflessness kay and i appreciated him for that. ok but only one thing — the man really made magnolia pass out during sex one too many times, it was kinda weird or was it just me 🤨

umm, why was tom completely written out of this though? it was kinda weird. like he just vanished wtf :/ i actually wanted more of my beloved here and he just wasn’t there?? he was the only sane one in the bunch and he’s just gone, what a tragedy. 😔💔

i will be elaborating on certain things that pissed me off / how i felt about certain events that happened because the way this book sent me spiraling is crazy, i tell you.

All my best nights, all my worst ones, all are with him and I wonder if this is the point. This is what I’m swimming towards: not just in love with him but a whole wonderful, terrifying, beautiful, painful life with him.

full on spoiler zone, proceed with caution ⚠️

i would like to say one thing about magnolia and bj’s relationship — no matter which way we see it, for whatever reason he did it, bj cheated first. he did it. and i don’t care what reason it was — yes, he got sexually assaulted, but he chose not to talk it out with magnolia and solve their problems together. that’s what being in a relationship means, i assume — facing the world together, fighting away anything that causes them pain. and i know for a fact that if bj had just opened up to magnolia at that time, she would’ve been the most understanding and caring person ever and would’ve been so receptive to everything he said and i just know her heart would’ve broken for what he’d gone through at such a young age, too.

so i didn’t appreciate bj blaming magnolia for running away at all because yes, she did it, but obviously she couldn’t trust someone who’d cheated with her best friend, who fucked around all the time, who never gave an ounce of inkling that he could be trusted. that he even gave a fuck about magnolia as a person and as someone to be valued and not just be treated like shit. where did we ever see him win her back? win back her trust and her love after breaking it like that so badly? i needed to see those scenes. did we see it when

1) he fucked paili, her best friend, without a single thought when she just offered herself to him like that (and we see that she always wanted to be with him that way, so)
2) he didn’t give a single “real” reason for cheating on her (aka, just saying he cheated because he “wanted to cheat”)
3) magnolia confessed her love for him so eagerly, and he rejected her and just went to bury himself (literally and figuratively) in his girlfriend
4) after they finally worked out most of their issues and they slept together (again), he went off to sleep with jordan because that’s what he thought he had to do
5) he kept slut-shaming her numerous times when he was the one who truly fucked around for whatever reason

and countless other instances where he both intentionally and unintentionally hurt magnolia but my head is tired and angry after thinking about all these things again so i’m just gonna leave it at that.

so i don’t see the reason he blames magnolia for that at all. in my opinion, she’s completely fair and justified in choosing not to let bj in because he’s never shown with his actions that he’s all in. even after saying — countless times, mind you — that he’s gonna break up with jordan, he didn’t even do the breaking up till jordan finally addressed the issue of bj being in love with another woman. imagine. he didn’t even have the courtesy of doing the break-up himself. so, what — was he just gonna use jordan as a safety blanket for himself forever?? it seems rather hypocritical of him to do that after criticizing magnolia for doing just the same thing.

that’s not to say magnolia is completely blameless. i adore her, she’s my queen after this book and how she got her own happiness but she did participate in this toxic relationship too. like the time when she blamed bj after sleeping with him when she realized he was cheating on his own gf with her. it’s understandable that she had doubts after that — especially because she herself got cheated on by bj and never wanted anyone to be in that position — but the fact that she didn’t think of that before!! i do defend her on this though, because she was having second thoughts only because of her own insecurities. did bj really have to go back to jordan and sleep with her after that. 🙄

she has also used so many people — christian, tom, julian, even bj at times — to ignore her own feelings about how she felt after bj cheated. but idc i’ll defend her because i get how she feels!!! it was completely natural to feel that way after everything bj’d done. she was also burying her head in the sand sometimes but i just wanted to give her a hug because she’d already gone through so much — especially after bj and her losing a kid. 🫂 that actually fucked me up a little because the way that grief was written was just so real and hit so deep, and i wish that was the way they’d dealt with the other topic which was mostly left unaddressed: bj’s sexual assault.

which brings me to this. what happened to bj was so brushed aside. like idk, i’d have expected it to be addressed more. it was just said once and then tossed aside like it was nothing?? like?? i almost felt like jessa randomly threw it in just to excuse bj’s cheating. i’m sorry but if there are no actions to back up the words then what else am i supposed to believe. both from magnolia and bj’s side, actually. i’d have expected them to at least address the issue right there, carefully, because male rape isn’t something to just be brushed aside like that — but it wasn’t even talked about after that one convo they had when bj confessed why he’d cheated.

another thing — i do not blame julian whatsoever for what happened in the end with bridge. was julian a gang lord? yes. but magnolia knew full well who he was and what his reputation was before getting involved with him — hell, she’d herself thought numerous times that she felt safe with him because she knew he’d protect her. and it’s not like the gang lord is just gonna come up to her and tell her “yknow what, i’m really dangerous, i can hurt you, blah-blah-blah” all that bullshit. i felt like magnolia just willingly blinded herself to the truth of getting involved with julian and she absolutely avoided all the red flags and buried her head in the sand, so i don’t think it was anyone’s fault that bridge got caught in the crossfire.

i’ve ranted enough about all this lol it’s almost to make a person wonder why i’d have even given it 4 stars 😭 but it’s mainly because of how invested the characters and the drama had me.

spoilers end! ⚠️

He laughs and for some reason it sounds like I’m ringing the doorbell of the home I grew up in.



in conclusion: this book put me through it. magnolia and bj are literally the epitome of toxic with the way they keep hurting each other, the constant miscommunication, them using other people to get back at each other - but in the end they just wanna get to each other.

[ellie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Jessa Hastings should sleep with one eye open, fr. never to know a moment of peace because WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO THAT FOR ????

[♥︎ Heather ⚔ (Semi-Hiatus-attempting return) · Rating 3 out of 5]

I need a therapy session and a few shots of tequila.

645 pages of toxic repetitive back and forth and then that ending! 😭

Send help.

Might review later.




————— ୨୧ —————

[siff ♡ · Rating 4 out of 5]

➵ 4.25 stars

“𝙏𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙥𝙪𝙡𝙡 𝙬𝙚 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚, 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙩𝙤𝙬 𝙤𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙪𝙣𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙚 𝙖𝙡𝙬𝙖𝙮𝙨 𝙙𝙧𝙖𝙜𝙜𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙪𝙨 𝙗𝙖𝙘𝙠 𝙩𝙤𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙙𝙨 𝙚𝙖𝙘𝙝 𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧, 𝙞𝙩 𝙝𝙖𝙨 𝙩𝙤 𝙢𝙚𝙖𝙣 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜, 𝙙𝙤𝙣’𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙠?”

summary:
after magnolia and beej’s last relationship tragedy, magnolia moved to new york, to avoid all the gossip, and try to start a life there. and beej who still lives in london appears to have moved on and started a new relationship with a girl named jordan. his first real relationship that wasn’t with magnolia. later on, magnolia takes a little trip back to london, to see her family and friends, since beej and magnolia have the same friend group, it’s quite impossible to avoid him, she’s not sure she wants to avoid him either. it’s gonna be the first time they’ve seen and talked to each other since she moved.

idk why i keep doing this to myself. i’m so unwell after this book ! it broke my heart and then continued to step on it throughout over 500 pages. i actually had to put on a baking show, while reading this book because it was just all too much and too heavy. i honestly don’t really know how to write this review, because my feelings are still all over the place after this book, but i’ll try my best for y’all <3 first of all these characters drive me utterly insane, but in the best way possible. this series had me pulling my hair, screaming into my pillow, sobbing till my eyes were red and swollen. the relationships and friendships in this series are just so heavy and complicated. it’s toxic, with lots of miscommunication, lots of drama, unhealthy habits, etc. i think this series hits me like it does because it’s so raw, heavy, and real. i both love it and hate it with my whole heart. it’s very hard and almost impossible to explain my feelings about this series tbh, but if you’ve read it and you love it, you probably know what i mean.

literally me after reading this book:


characters:
magnolia parks / parks
i’ve got quite a lot to say about this girl, so go make yourself some popcorn, and don’t forget something to drink. i honestly don’t even know where to start. she’s just so unnecessarily extra, needy, dramatic, etc. and not in a good way imo. i get that many of y’all think she’s an icon and all that, and while i can see why y’all think that, she just made me so mad, it’s impressive my eyes are still stuck on my face, because i could not count the number of times i rolled them, even on 20 hands. she was so incredibly childish sometimes, e. g. jordan beej’s new girlfriend brought a friend to a party kinda thing, and then the friend hugged magnolia to say hi, and magnolia literally brushed her dress off after, omfg girl grow tf up, you’re not the fucking queen of england. she reminds me of that one girl in every class that thinks she’s better than everyone else keyword being “thinks”. she’s also constantly naming every fucking piece of clothing in every fucking room, GIRL WE GET IT, YOU’RE RICH. and i know it’s her thing, and it WAS iconic in the first book, and the first 100 pages in this one, after that it was just plain annoying. if you saw my updates you already know that she couldn’t even wash a fucking plate, and she put vegetables in the fucking dishwasher because she tried to clean them. and i get that she grew up with a nanny, and all that, but come on ! now enough of her being her annoying self, she also had some girlboss moments i won’t lie, but they sadly didn’t make up for everything else. *breathe in, breathe out* i’m sorry i really tried to like her and find her iconic, but i just couldn’t. it’s not that i hate her, i just don’t like her. but when that’s said i do understand her in some ways and can see why she made the choices she made. i kinda like her for being her annoying self tbf, it’s a magnolia thing can’t explain.

“…𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙝𝙚 𝙡𝙤𝙤𝙠𝙨 𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙥𝙮 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙄 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙝𝙞𝙢 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙣 𝙄 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙢𝙚, 𝙨𝙤 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙝𝙞𝙢 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚 𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙥𝙮 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙣 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙢𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚 𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙥𝙮.”

baxter james ballentine / beej
i honestly don’t know what to say about his character either, because i actually like him, and that goes beyond everything i stand for irl ! because beej cheated on magnolia, there’s a really long backstory to that tho, but still, normally i’d say dumb him on the spot, and make his life miserable, but this guy does wired things to my heart and makes me question myself fr. he honestly loves magnolia so much, it actually hurts my heart. beej has also been through a lot, and he lacks communication skills big time ! but there’s just something about bj, that makes it impossible for me to hate him which can be annoying. i seriously couldn’t be in a relationship with a guy like beej, so respect to magnolia for that, but she isn’t exactly that much better. and one of the things that makes beej so complicated is that he doesn’t really think before he acts, and when he gets hurt, he hurts the person right back.

“𝙎𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙪𝙡𝙡𝙨 𝙖𝙬𝙖𝙮 𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢 𝙢𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙖𝙨 𝙨𝙝𝙚 𝙙𝙤𝙚𝙨, 𝙄 𝙨𝙡𝙞𝙥 𝙢𝙮 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙩 𝙞𝙣 𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙗𝙖𝙘𝙠 𝙥𝙤𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙩… 𝙏𝙝𝙖𝙩’𝙨 𝙖 𝙡𝙞𝙚. 𝙎𝙝𝙚 𝙖𝙡𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙮 𝙝𝙖𝙙 𝙞𝙩. 𝘽𝙪𝙩 𝙄 𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙞𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙖𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙜𝙤𝙤𝙙 𝙢𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙪𝙧𝙚.”

⎯ magnolia and beej’s relationship is so hard to explain because they both love each other more than they love themselves, it’s both absolutely heartbreaking and beautiful at the same time. but oh my, the things these two will put your heart and your brain through is unexplainable ! they had me stressed, angry, sad, happy, etc. i feel all the feels when i’m reading this series, and i both love it and hate it.

you may wonder why and how, i love this book so much, with a fmc i’m not exactly crazy about, but it’s just different with this series ! i truly can’t explain it, this series is unlike anything else i’ve ever read ! in any other book i’d hate these relationships, all the drama, all the toxicity, etc. but these books are just something else. i’d 100 percent recommend it, you just gotta be as prepared as you can be, go buy some recovery ice cream like me, and a box of tissues or two.

it’s safe to say i’m not emotionally stable enough for this series, but idgaf shits addictive ! this whole universe is so deep, and emotional. and the ending of this book left me shaking and crying, just utterly heartbroken. istg i never saw that plot twist coming, and i’m so glad i had sab that could share my pain with lol <3

“𝙃𝙤𝙬’𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙬𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧, 𝙋𝙖𝙧𝙠𝙨?”
- truly an absolute shitstorm.

moments that are imprinted on my soul:
“He laughs and for some reason it sounds like I’m ringing the doorbell of the home I grew up in.”

“Wonder how long it’ll take for us to get to the place where I can just throw my arm about her, let her be mine out loud, not just inside my head.”

“You don’t trust me.”
“How could I trust you?”
“I’d die for you.”
“That, I believe. I too trust you with my life.”
“Just not your heart.”
“Just not my heart.”

“It’s always going to be you, Parks. Just a matter of when.”

spotify playlist; magnolia parks: magnolia and beej
(the link only works on laptop tho)

i’ve got one more thing left to say; daisy haites supremacy 💋
------
preview:
sabrina babes you and your gorgeous review convinced me <3 just brought a box of tissues and recovery ice cream, so i feel like i'm as ready as i can get. ps; yes i'm about to drag y'all through the pain with me

[jess · Rating 5 out of 5]

*:･ﾟ✧ We’re fated. Woven into the tapestry of the universe, my name right next to hers. We’re in the stars.

second read ~ december 2023

yk those hiccups you get after crying so much? that is what chapter eighty-two gives me. jessa hastings pls give me that mp3 arc, i will sell my first born to you.



first read ~ september 2023

write a review about mp2 without crying challenge. well, guess what i failed before i even started 😔


jessa hastings how do you sleep at night? how do you snuggle up in bed knowing you broke OUR HEARTS 💔 i’ll never be the same, a day will never go by without me thinking about this entire book. i love this book and i hate it at the same time because how does something cause me joy from one minute to immense suffering? 😔 my plot to steal that manuscript is set and i hope she knows i’m out for it.


to describe the emotions i went through without spoiling it would have to be me going on a rollercoaster, with about 35 loops, and i’m also not wearing any sort of harness and i’m holding on to luck.


baxter james ballentine is no longer blow job anymore 🥹 he's beej to me. im a bj apologist and i don’t care!!! sue me but i love him and even tho i still wanted him to punch him in this book HIS GROWTH??? the way he talks about magnolia every time gets me 🥺 they are my babies and i’ll go to war with anyone for them

Her little breaths warm my face and I feel like I’ve been kicked in the chest by a horse, that’s the way she makes me feel.

magnolia parks is still my queen! even tho she’s a little slow and i wish i could knock some sense into her, i still love her and i still want to give her the biggest hug ever 😔

A blank card reads: I don’t think I’ll ever stop looking for a time machine. Until I find one, here’s a time keeper instead.

On the back she’s engraved: On borrowed time without you.

all this book ever did was cause me pain!!! and that ending?? what even is going on? do i ever get answers or do i have to continue sleeping on the highway to have some sense of peace????


and a lot of the side characters grew on me besides julian he’s fishy and i’m now going to cry until i get answers 😓😓


🎧: too many songs be hitting 😞 my playlist goes too hard


quotes:

I started therapy to get her back, wanting to grow into the kind of person she’d want to be with, be good enough, be the sort of person worthy of a girl like Parks.

“If you love a flower…” I say eventually, glancing at her. One of my tattoos, about her, like all of them are. “—That lives on a star, it is sweet to look at the sky at night…”

The great monument to our love is a withering tree and a blank stone that means the world to me and maybe nothing to anyone else.

“I don’t know the worst parts of you.” I ran my thumb over her scar. “I just know you, Parks.”

“He laughs and for some reason it sounds like I'm ringing the doorbell of the home I grew up in.”

———
i told myself i’d start this in the morning but i literally can’t stop thinking about them ❤️‍🩹



if you were sick of my updates for mp1, you’ll be even more sick again 😋

[alessia · Rating 3 out of 5]

me when ‘the LONG way home’ was actually long
😱😳😨😮🙀😧😦😯😲🤯

[Alyssa Nieves · Rating 5 out of 5]

This series is putting me THROUGH it. That ending??? Criminal. Jessa Hastings doesn’t want me to be happy. I’m convinced.

All the emotional damage aside, this book is probably my favorite in the series so far. BJ and Magnolia have my whole heart, I need Julian like I need air, and Bridget is an absolute icon. I love these characters so so much and I can’t wait to read the next book/books!

Favorite quotes:

“Rummage through the drawer in my mind as fast as I can to find the words to tell her that I’m coming for her, I’m on my way back, that this is just the long way home.” Absolutely unwell.

“We're fated. Woven into the tapestry of the universe, my name right next to hers. We're in the stars.”

“She pulls away from me and as she does, I slip my heart in her back pocket. That’s a lie. She already had it. But I give it to her again for good measure.” !!!!

“Eternally sunny, then.”
“Oh—” He grimaces. “Can’t promise that. Storms always come, they have to — brings balance.”

“But he can't promise he won't hurt me so I don't know how to promise I'll stay.” Pain. Just pain.

[Emmy Rosam · Rating 5 out of 5]

Edit: 5 stars. Can’t stop thinking about it. 5 star series!!!

I am in shock… my heart has fallen completely through my arse with that ending

[chloé ✿ · Rating 5 out of 5]

any book that leaves me in shock a week after finishing it & still has me speechless deserves no less than 5 stars

just… wow

[Lilyya ♡ · Rating 2 out of 5]

”She and I, we’re forever waiting for green. It’s always the red man.”

i read the first book. i loved the first book. the first made sense. whoever this one lacked.. its own plot line ? sens ? a purpose as well ? i just kept thinking while reading it 'why this book ? what did it add to their story?' when there’s still a third book coming about magnolia and bj? i simply got bored by the repetitive plot-line of the two books and the broken record the narrative kept exploring: love you. love you not. want you. want you not. wanna hurt you. don’t like you hurting. even though the horrific and unforgettable ending gave a little clarification to the pending question it also came 350 pages late..

i disparately needed some substance to their 'written in the stars' type of bond and relationship. the 3rd december glorification emphasized some heartbreaking and beautiful colors from it but its effects evaporated before the start of Part Two and that’s where i lost the spark and magic the first book sculpted around them.

'the why' Bj did what he did to Magnolia was easily deductible in book one. you see the pattern, you understand the pattern. now, is it forgettable and forgivable? i guess the answer is above. if the plot line didn’t fail on depicting their anterior relationship the way every character was portraying it; once in a life time kind of love. the answer would definitely be yes but, it wasn’t and i was kind of mad and a lot disappointed about it.

whoever, i want to see what happens to everyone after that ending and Jessa Hastings’ plume is still hypnotizing and this was basically the only reason that pushed me to not abandon this universe.

——
yeah watch me skipping book 2 🫢

[Mandy · Rating 5 out of 5]

i’m unwell.

[Aliki (semi hiatus) · Rating 5 out of 5]

Well, fuck.

[benedicta · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5⭐️ me gaslighting myself right 😣😣

the last two chapters did not happen. in fact, they were never written and I never read them and my favorite character in this universe is going to get a book and I'll read it and have a review for that one. I don't need therapy. cheers xx

[kimberly ☆ · Rating 5 out of 5]

i’m so confused y’all like my heart hurts and i’ve been attacked there’s no other way of putting it

[Paige · Rating 5 out of 5]

First 5 stars of the series for me 🥰 RTC

Jessa, you and I have a problem because there’s no way you just did that to me 😭😭😭

- - -

I'm not emotionally stable enough for this but I need to catch up before MP3 comes out 😩

[naima · Rating 5 out of 5]

im ugly crying and throwing up this blurry ass books couldnt even read a fucking word without it turning blurry.

But Jordan’s not Parks, so I just give my brother a look.

She doesn’t know. Doesn’t get it. Doesn’t know about the eyes and the photos. Doesn’t know what we’re like if we’re in the same room.

Breakfast time, cups of tea. Bumblebees. Honey. The stars. Gucci. The Discovery Channel. Long drives. Driving in general. Willow trees. Uno. Old Skool Vans. Tiffany’s. Maserati’s. Lilac. Boys with tattoos.

“How’s the weather, Parks?”

“What’d you call the Pinterest board?”

the literal colour purple.

Can you love someone you’ve never met?

Back in those days I could read her best if I could see her eyes. Don’tneed them anymore. I can read her with both our eyes closed and my hands behind her back.

“That’s your read on her?” Bridget blinks. “Bad coffee shop vibe?”

our two smashed-up hearts on the floor and we can’t even tell our pieces apart anymore but we’re the only glue we need so it doesn’t matter anyway

She’s thegreatest drug on the planet. I’ve done them all and I know it for sure.

Rummage through the drawer in my mind as fast as I can to find the words to tell her that I’m coming for her, I’m on my way back, that this is just the long way home.

“Like the shower thing. You can’t go to bed without a shower, but you can have naps without one, even if your nap is in the bed.” She squinted over at me.
“Or,” I continued, “you stir you tea in multiples of seven. You need the mint taste in your mouth to go to sleep. Or how your food can’t be touching. Or how once you get into bed at bed time, if you get out again, you need to wash your feet or you can’t sleep.”

because even before any of the shit that would happen to us happened, we’d managed to sew ourselves into one.

On borrowed time without you.

“In another life I reckon I could have loved you.”“In another life I would have let you.”

She buys clothes for all of us, especially when she’s feeling out of control.

She pulls away from me and as she does, I slip my heart in her back pocket. That’s a lie. She already had it. But I give it to her again for good measure.

“I’d be anything for you.”
“Will you be my friend?”

“You need anything ever — ever — I’m your man.”

“For the long haul.”

Vintage Parks.

“BJ!” My mother gives me a stern look. “Are you distracting her from getting ready?”
“Yes,” Magnolia peeps from behind me, eager to not get a bollocking
from my mum.
“He’s being terribly distracting, Lil. He’s throwing T-shirts
at me and telling me I have no friends.”
“Get out—
” Mum eyes me as she points to the door.
“This is my room!” I roll my eyes at her.
“Not anymore, darling. This is going to be my craft room, I’ve just decided.”
“Is it?” Magnolia asks, cheerily poking her head from around me.
“Can I come and use it?”
“You don’t like crafts,” I remind her.
“But perhaps I would if there was a room for it? What kind of crafts are you envisioning, Lilian? Flower pressing? Maybe some candle making?”
I squint down at her. “I’ll give you a million dollars if you can make a candle.”

“You two love an almost, don’t you?

“We’re in the stars, Parks.”

She’s browsing the store, I’m buying the store. Watch her with more focus than I would a film. We could call it making up for lost time because we’ve lost a lot of it but I’ve never stopped looking at her.

How many loves do you get in a lifetime? For me it’s just the one. I’ve had more but as I float away there’s only one I’m thinking of.

I appear to be leaving him once again — I hope that he forgives me for this one because it wasn’t my fault.

“Eternally sunny, then. ”

She thinks we’re in the stars but I just think she’s the current of everything and I’m always just
drifting… Floating home to her.

“And also your real subtle Pinterest board named ‘dream engagement rings’ was of some help.”

“It was always going to be you, Parks. Just a matter of when.”

through all the ways our parents failed us, my sister did not. My sister is the lace trimming around all of it.

[Uswah · Rating 5 out of 5]

“I’ll be whatever the eff you need, Parks.” 🫠🥹💍 The way BJ just loves with his whole heart—even after EVERYTHING he’s been through??? This boy is sunshine wrapped in trauma and I would protect him with my life.

OMGGG I missed BJ & Parks SO MUCH 🥹🥹🫶 AHHHHH saying it again… I am LOVING this chaos 🤭🤭 GIMME MORE!!!

That was a wild ride 🥲 I went in completely blind, not knowing this book would wreck me, shatter me, and break me into a million pieces. BUT I LOVED EVERY SECOND OF IT!!!!

Everything BJ went through 😭 OH MY GOD. He was just fourteen. NOOO 😭😭 I’ve always supported you, my boy 🥹And BJ & Parks were just teenagers when THAT happened 😭 The backstory. The loss. The pain. The growth. The freaking fate of it all?? ✨ My babies deserved so much better, and yet somehow, they made beauty out of the broken. I'm not okay. My babies deserve the whole damn world 🥹🥹🫂They’re fated, fr 😼

Now let’s talk about Julian. Remember when I said I loved him? Yeah... same. 🙂‍↕️ I was so mad at him during that whole drama, especially after what he did. BUT once it was revealed that he did THAT to help Magnolia with the BJ situation? UGH. I loved him all over again. 🥹🤭 He deserves the world too. He was never selfish—just scared. And that final page?? JESSA, WHAT DID YOU DO?????? HELLOOOOO?? IS HE OKAY?? HE BETTER BE!!! I CANNOT handle another emotional breakdown 😭😭😭

And now, to the main thing 😭😭😭YEAH, I’m already crying. ‼️SPOILER WARNING‼️

BRIDGET.😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭NOOOOOOO 😭😭😭😭😭Jessa Hastings, can you please do a miracle?? I am begging. I NEED her back. I don’t care how—it just has to happen 😭😭😭I LOVE Bridget (I STILL DO)…WHY, JESSA, WHYYYY!!!???? 😭😭😭
And now everything makes sense…That accident scene, Bridget saying “I’m fine, I just have a bump on the head.” 😭😭😭And then her getting a headache 😭😭😭… I was TOO happy about BJ and Parks and the 💍 😭I CRIED. Can we start a petition? A spell? A multiverse where Bridget is alive and well and giving Parks the biggest hugs??? Because I NEED IT. We ALL need it. I refuse to believe that was the end for her.

😭😭😭I remember finishing the book at 2:10 A.M. (thanks to Laura) and immediately running to Laura Bestie 😭🫂(btw, THANK YOU SO MUCH for the hugs, they helped fr 😭😭😭thank you for putting up with my spiral, bestie!!!)

Yup, that’s it. I’m sad again. 😭But thank you for reading my meltdown 🫠😭Love y’all. 💔🫂

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﹏𓊝﹏pre-read﹏𓊝﹏

EEEEEP!!! I’m so ready 🤭💚💙