Conversations With a Rattlesnake: Raw and Honest Reflections on Healing and Trauma

by Theo Fleury, Kim Barthel

Following the release of his mind-blowing first book, Playing with Fire , Theo Fleury joins forces with world-renowned therapist Kim Barthel in a new book,  Conversations with a Rattlesnake , coming out November 2014. The book is a raw and honest conversation, loaded with personal insights and cutting-edge information about healing from trauma and abuse. Fleury calls Barthel the “Wayne Gretzky of therapy” and within their emotionally safe relationship he bares his soul so that others can learn from his mistakes, triumphs and new learnings. Fleury’s story will inspire not only those overcoming their own trauma but friends, parents, teachers, coaches, therapists and health practitioners―anyone who is in the critical position of supporting someone who needs to share their own story. Co-author Kim Barthel provides an in-depth explanation of early childhood attachment and addiction that ties into the reasoning behind our behaviours and the science of how our brains work. Barthel explains how understanding groundbreaking scientific and psychological research can eliminate the unnecessary and damaging shame that so often accompanies abuse and trauma. Her dialogue with Fleury illuminates self-awareness, mindfulness and the power of relationships. Fleury’s life experiences and Barthel’s informed interpretation combine to provide a unique look at the healing process that is easy to read, entertaining and transformational.

Genres: Nonfiction, Self Help, Psychology

200 pages, Hardcover

First published November 8, 2014

About the author

Theoren "Theo" Fleury was born in Oxbow, Saskatchewan, and grew up in the small town of Russell, Manitoba, the eldest of three boys.

Fleury grew up playing hockey, overcoming his small stature by adopting an aggressive and determined style of play. As a youth, he played with the St. James Canadians of the Manitoba Junior Hockey League and the Moose Jaw Warriors of the Western Hockey League. He also twice represented Canada in the World Junior Hockey Championships.

The Calgary Flames drafted Fleury in the 8th round, 166th overall, in the 1987 NHL Entry Draft. He scored 34 points in 36 games in his rookie season, helping the Calgary Flames to the first Stanley Cup in franchise history.

Despite emerging as a remarkable talent in professional and international hockey, Fleury's personal life and eventually his career were disrupted by alcoholism, drug abuse, marital, legal, and financial problems, and gambling. In 2003, Fleury was suspended by the NHL for violating the terms of its substance abuse program.

After spending several years working on his sobriety and playing senior hockey in the North Peace Hockey and Elite Ice Hockey leagues, Fleury launched a comeback attempt with the NHL in 2009. He was reinstated to the NHL on September 10, 2009, and was invited for a try-out by the Calgary Flames. He played four exhibition games with the Flames, delighting Calgary fans. The team released him, and he announced his retirement from professional hockey on September 28h, 2009.

Coauthored with Kirstie McLellan Day, Fleury's autobiography, Playing With Fire, was released on October 16, 2009. The book chronicles the highs and lows of his career, as well as the sexual abuse he allegedly suffered as a youth at the hands of disgraced former hockey coach Graham James. The book became a bestseller in his home country of Canada.

Fleury now works with the American organization 1 in 6, which works with men recovering from sexual abuse.

Reviews

[Chrystele Chevallier-Grabinska · Rating 4 out of 5]

To have a better understanding of the life long consequences of a traumatic experience. An easy reading that immerses you into the conversation between Theo Fleury and his therapist. Theo Fleury is a master of resiliency.

[Laurie Warren · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book isn’t simply a “good book.” It’s not just entertaining or helpful. It IS all of those things, but much more. This book is a gift…a groundbreaker and a game-changer. There is nothing fluffy about it, it’s about a journey of digging deep, sitting in your sh*#, and healing because of one’s willingness to engage with themselves on that level. It’s about healing from trauma, meaningful engagement in relationships, and increasing consciousness. It’s about knowing that you’re not alone, that you’re worthy of love, that you can find support, and that you CAN heal.

“Conversations with a Rattlensake” offers a multi-faceted take on human relations, trauma, and our epidemic of poor self-worth. Kim and Theo explore the most effective ways to garner support, the science behind much of our relational experience, deep discussion around our relationship with ourselves (huge!), and even simple tactical ways to relax, relieve emotional tension, and truly connect with others. A rich toolbox is offered in one well-written “conversation!”

The manner in which it’s written, as a “conversation,” helps the reader to stay engaged with a difficult topic. To feel like they are actually in the room with the authors, sharing insights with some really smart, courageous, heart-based peeps. By the end of the book, I was completely in love with both of the writers and their ability and willingness to be vulnerable and open in a public forum. With awe and gratitude, I wholeheartedly recommend this book…for everyone. If you are a parent, teacher, counselor, friend, spouse, partner, family member, work with humans, live with humans, have been abused, or have abused others…well then, this book is for you. Thank you to the authors for this incredible gift, at a time when it is sorely needed. Let the healing revolution begin.

[Greg · Rating 3 out of 5]

Such an incredible story; such an incredible comeback. It's a privilege to get a glimpse into the process of healing and redemption offered here. If I have a peeve, it's with the unnecessary parenthetical descriptions that attempt to show facial expressions or other conversational elements. They detract, rather than add, to the dialogue and ideas presented here.

[Rick Fess · Rating 1 out of 5]

I tried but could not finish this book. I rarely start a book and don't finish it, so this was unusual for me. I was expecting a narrative, but this was boring and I could not get into the "question and answer" format.

[Allison Patterson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not an easy read, but an important one to understand the effects of trauma on one's mental health.

[Tracy · Rating 3 out of 5]

Such a good book about Theo’s path to healing. I did like his first book better but learned a ton from this one!!

[Ryan Eaton · Rating 1 out of 5]

Couldn’t get into this one. Mostly like reading a play script of a conversation with two people

[Danielle · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is one of the BEST books I've read in a LONG time. If you want to improve relationships in your life. If you want to think about how events in your past affect how you live today. If you want to understand those around you that are in your life every day. If you want to be a better parent. . . .I highly recommend reading this book.

[Michael Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

I haven't finished it yet but so far there have been many Aha and Me Too moments. But the real meat of this book is the explanations of what Theo and many of us who are survivors of Childhood trauma experience in our lives.
The what do I do now is so clearly explained By Kim and Theo. Namaste

[Hannah Green · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amazingly insightful book. A must read for anyone who has experienced trauma or sexual abuse or works with those who have.

[Rick · Rating 2 out of 5]

More interesting reading the back of a cereal box.

[Kjerstin]

Excellent insight into how understanding early life experiences impact future functioning...