If Only: Finding Contentment in the Face of Lack and Longing

by Jennie Pollock

Finding contentment when life lets you down.

Life doesn't always go the way we hope it will. Whether it's singleness, childlessness, or some other big disappointment, it's hard to be content when life lets us down. Author Jennie Pollock knows what it's like to feel discontent. With warmth and honesty, she answers common doubts that arise when life doesn't go the way we had Is God good? Is he enough? Is he worth it?

She walks listeners through the process of taking our eyes off the things we wish we had and instead enjoying the character of the God we do have - a God who is good, who meets all our needs, and whose promises are worth the wait.

Drawing on encouragements from the Bible and the stories of others, this book helps listeners to trust in God's plan for their lives and enjoy true contentment through a genuine conviction that Jesus is better than even our most keenly felt hopes and longings for this life.

Genres: Christian, Christian Living, Nonfiction, Christian Non Fiction, Audiobook

Audible Audio

First published November 1, 2020

About the author

Jennie Pollock is the author of If Only: Finding joyful contentment in the face of lack and longing , published by The Good Book Company in November 2020.

She lives in central London and will work wherever the wifi is free, the chairs are comfy, and the tea is plentiful.

She mostly writes from a Christian faith perspective, and loves reading between the lines of our cultural values and assumptions to learn what they tell us about life and how it works - and then writing about it.

Jennie blogs at jenniepollock.com and tweets as https://twitter.com/MissJenniep

Reviews

[Elise · Rating 4 out of 5]

Writing style: 🌟🌟🌟🌟
Engagement:🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟
Content: 🌟🌟🌟🌟
Purpose:🌟🌟🌟🌟
Value:🌟🌟🌟🌟
Overall: 4.2/5

[Julie H · Rating 4 out of 5]

Long enough to make her point, short enough that it is not repetitive and definitely doesn't drag on. Contentment is something that can be learned and nurtured. I really enjoyed the short chapters with real stories from real people who have slowly learned the secret of contentment.

[Gabby · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed reading this book. It was honest, relevant and biblically grounded. Between each chapter there were short testimonies of people who have had to learn contentment in a range of different circumstances. These added to the depth of the book and showed that contentment really is possible.

Throughout the book Pollock used examples from scripture, the lives of other Christian’s and her own life to show that God is powerful, God is good and He is more than enough.

These are two of my favourite quotes from the book. In both of these I am encouraged to trust God’s plan which is infinitely better than my own (even if I can’t quite understand how):

“Whatever your current “if only..” is, whatever plot twists have undermined your confidence, whatever details you wish you could rewrite, don’t lose confidence in where the story is going. God has not made a mistake. He hasn’t got overwhelmed with all the plates he’s trying to keep spinning, and let you fall. There is a plan - a good plan. One day you will be with Jesus, in a perfect new creation, looking back on this part of your story and giving thanks to God that he wrote it exactly how he did. It will make perfect sense. It will have the meaning you are wishing you could discern right now.” (Pollock, p. 83)

“But what we need to learn - what Isaiah learned and what Paul learned and what all the heroes of the faith learned - is that we are not the main character: God is. It’s all about his happy ending. He loves you, and he has wonderful plans for you, but they may not be the same plans in the same way at the same time as you had hoped.” (Pollock, p. 140)

[Rebekah · Rating 5 out of 5]

I just got a pre-released copy of Jennie Pollock’s book and I couldn’t be more pleased. It was honest, real, and biblically sound. She was not afraid of talking about the struggles in life that we sometimes like to shy away from. When you are doing everything that God wants you to do and yet he still isn’t giving you what you want. Is He even good? Is He even real? Is He worth the work if He won’t even reward me for all of my hard work! I have struggled with all of these questions throughout my life. She pulled stories from people in all sorts of different places in life struggling with the thought of “If Only I had...” Her honesty was refreshing and her insights were incredibly profound. I am in college and will be recommending this book to all of my friends struggling with not feeling content in their place in life.

[Panda Incognito · Rating 4 out of 5]

In this book, Jennie Pollock encourages Christians to find contentment within their hard circumstances, knowing that God is with them, loves them, and has their good in mind. To illustrate this, she shares her personal story of coming to terms with her singleness, showing her perspective changed over time as she delved deeper into her relationship with God. She also shares stories at the end of each chapter from different individuals or couples who also have stories about finding contentment in difficult situations. This book is a short, simple read, and is full of solid teaching and gentle encouragement.

Pollock emphasizes that even when we desire good things, if we are unable to live without them, then our longings are a barrier between us and God. She explores what the Bible has to say about different common questions, such as “Is God good?” and “Is God worth it?”, and pushes back against the works-righteousness idea that we can earn or demand God’s blessings because of our own good behavior. She also shares practical advice for issues like avoiding the comparison trap, dealing with temptation, and engaging with the family of God even when you feel isolated and discontent.

Many books like this conclude with the author’s happy ending, suggesting that if you surrender to God, your dreams will also come true. However, Pollock is still unmarried, and this gives the book additional power, showing that contentment in the midst of unfulfilled desires is truly possible. This is a great book for any Christian struggling to feel satisfied with life, and even though this book has a feminine cover design, the content and messages are completely applicable to men as well.

I received a free copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.

[Lara · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book. It's a quick read and really is the perfect length - long enough to get the point across, and it doesn't drag on or get too repetitive which can happen easily with books like this.
There's no secret fix for finding contentment, but the author does a good job of helping to build the theological foundation necessary to really make contentment a part of your everyday life... and she does it in basic, clear language. Christian books can sometimes be too theologically dense with a million words you've never heard before OR just be a bunch of fluff without the proper scriptural support, but this book strikes the balance between being readable/relatable and theologically rooted. She gives some good, practical tips for how to let go of the desires that are weighing you down and how to discern when good desires are becoming idols. And at every step, she points you back to Jesus and the reality that we will never achieve contentment if we rely on our own willpower.
It was also a good reminder that everyone is struggling with something. Through stories of people facing different contentment challenges, she shows that just because you get the thing that you think you need, it doesn't mean that you're going to be content. You're single and want to get married. Then you're married and want to have kids. Then you have kids and for whatever reason, it doesn't go the way you hoped. There's always going to be the "next thing", and getting what you desire isn't going to solve the root problem which is our need for Jesus.
Definitely recommend!

[Natalie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a great book. It’s thoughtful, honest, and theologically rich. Very few of the concepts presented were new to me, as someone who has been active in church for a long time, but the way she writes about them makes them hit home a different way. I love the personal stories of the author and others in the book - sometimes it is so easy to focus on what God hasn’t given you it’s hard to remember that the waiting and longing and trials are universal and they produce a depth of faith and character. Pick this book up!

[Claire Ruiz · Rating 3 out of 5]

I gave this 3/5 stars because it had some really good one liners & ideas but I unfortunately didn’t feel as moved by this book as I hoped I would. I also kinda felt like the author lacked a wholistic perspective on the topic. BUT with all that being said I actually still would recommend this to someone because it was encouraging & biblically sound - I think I would just recommend it with the caveat that I didn’t necessarily love the direction she took the topic of contentment 100% of the book.

- Also I just looked at the reviews & everyone seems to love this book, so maybe I’m just being nit-picky😂

[Molly Start · Rating 3 out of 5]

A helpful read on how to practice joyful contentment in life’s disappointments and longings

[Amy · Rating 5 out of 5]

For those that can’t understand why they think God is withholding good things from them.
God is good. God is enough. God is worth it. A helpful read!

[Ben Moore · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a really excellent book that gives actually satisfactory answers to the problem of contentment. Of course the answer is 'Jesus', but what does that even mean?

Rather than just throwing bible verses at sad people, Jennie Pollock uses case studies to explain her thoughts clearly. The most important case study is the apostle Paul. If a man for whom persecution, torture, and imprisonment could be summed up as 'Tuesday' can claim contentment, it's probably worth a look at what he's talking about.

Philippians 2:12-13 is the central text, and Pollock unpacks what it means when he says that he can 'do all this through him who gives me strength'.

This isn't a book about not wanting things. It's not a book about never being unhappy. It's a book about learning contentment despite these things, and it's one that I've found invaluable recently.

[Aaron · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don’t think anyone could have anticipated how 2020 would turn out. Has life gone the way you hoped it would? In her new book, If Only, Jennie Pollock helps us find contentment in the face of lack and longing.

An Attack on Contentment

In 6 chapters and just less than 150 pages, Pollock takes the time to answer the important questions that attack our contentment. But first, Pollock reminds us to put our attention on God. Focus on him and on who he has made you to be in Christ.

Is God good? Is God enough? Is God worth it? Pollock uses Scripture and personal examples to provide answers. She challenges us to put our eyes to Scripture, journey with others, persevere, and place our hope in Christ.

Rejoice Always

Chapter 5 is a standout chapter as Pollock helps us to practice contentment. She says that it is something we can choose. And like the Apostle Paul, we must remember to rejoice. Practice gratitude, learn to lament, embrace community, and look to Jesus.

I was most impacted by Chapter 6. Pollock walks through several questions that help diagnose our heart. But she does not leave us without hope. She points back to the truth of Scripture and shows that God is still working.

Wisdom and Warmth

Throughout the book are real-life stories of those who have longed for more. Even Pollock is open and honest, but she writes with wisdom and warmth. I’ve learned that the life I’ve longed for can be laid at the feet of Jesus. And he doesn’t laugh or scoff. In Christ, I have everything. I’ve found that I lack nothing. He satisfies my longing soul.

I received a media copy of If Only and this is my honest review.

[Melanie Mead · Rating 5 out of 5]

I picked up If Only last Saturday, thinking to read a few pages and before I knew it, I had read half the book! I ended up finishing it the very next day. I think we all have "if onlys" in our lives - whether we feel we've been denied something big - a spouse, a child, healing, or financial security - or whether it's a combination of small disappointments in life. This book offers hope and presents a warm and biblical call to surrender our longings to Jesus and to find our joy and satisfaction in him. He truly is enough - even in the face of pain and unfulfilled desires. Jennie writes from her own personal experience of dealing with singleness, but I really think this book will speak to every Christian, whatever "if only" you may be carrying. I found Jennie's writing style engaging, easy to read, refreshingly honest and strongly rooted in biblical truth. Also, the true stories of people dealing with various "if onlys" added so much to the book. Jennie addresses the big questions people often ask when experiencing lack and longing: Is God good? Is He enough? Is following Him worth it? I can't recommend this book highly enough. It is a breath of fresh air in our often cynical world and really pointed my heart to Jesus.

[Peter Pollock · Rating 5 out of 5]

In this world where marketers constantly tell us that we need more, better "stuff" to finally be happy, where even our hair "deserves" better, more expensive products, it can be incredibly difficult to find contentment right where you are.

If only there was a key to finding contentment....

Well, problem solved, because in this easy to read, well laid out book is the key to finding the kind of peace and contentment you're lacking.

With real world examples in every chapter and plain, simple explanations of the concepts we need to grasp and how to go about finding our way past our walls and barriers to find what we are missing, the author really opens up this topic and provides a realistic, easy to follow path to finding what we've been searching for all our lives.

I cannot recommend this book enough to anyone looking for the keys to contentment in a crazy world!

[Ali · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is one of those books that once I’d started reading I couldn’t put down! So many of us live with our ‘If only things were different’ situations which make us question if God loves or even cares about us. We can so easily convince ourselves that if we had ‘the thing’ we conceive as missing from our lives, we would be made more whole and more useful to God. Jennie draws on her own personal experience and with great honestly opens up the question of what if our ‘if onlys’ are what make us more Christlike and in turn draw us closer to him. A great book full of biblical wisdom, I encourage you to read it.

[Maui Rochell · Rating 5 out of 5]

Finally finished this on Christmas Day. Started reading it around October while I was at the prayer mountain with Jhar. During that time, I've been experiencing great discontent with a specific area in my life and fast forward to this day and I never felt so contented with my life now. The blessings are just bonuses indeed but the relationship, the peace and joy in having an intimate relationship with God, it's incomparable.

Often we always look out for the blessings without realizing it's becoming an idol. But the most important thing lies on having that inseparable relationship and fellowship with God, no matter what journey we are taking.

Thank You, Lord. 🥺

[Sage · Rating 4 out of 5]

Such a great, encouraging book. Focusing on the ‘who’ not the ‘what’. I think this book will be an encouragement and helpful book for many christians who are struggling with unfulfilled longings. This book directs our focus back on God and who he is and that He is good and can be trusted without negating that there’s real pain in waiting and loss. Short, quick, easy read with lots of good stuff to think on and remind ourselves of.

[Elanor Lawrence · Rating 4 out of 5]

Solid little book on contentment. I read it in an afternoon and appreciated it, but now, a month on, I can't remember pretty much anything. I don't think anything about this book radically shifted my perspective on contentment, but it was definitely worth the hour or so it took to read. Always helpful to read a clear outline of just why it is indeed worth laying aside our desires and seeking God first.

[John G · Rating 5 out of 5]

As someone who has wrestled with a number of 'if only's' I was drawn to read this book. Jennie does a fantastic job of asking questions that resonate deeply. Is God good? Is God enough? And is God worth it? A wonderful antidote to the me-focussed world we live in, bathed in scripture and coursing with hope - highly recommended!

[Cat Caird · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is challenging and very timely. How can we be content & thankful in the situations we find ourselves in, especially when our dreams seem so far away? Jennie explores this, drawing on her own life experiences and sharing stories of others & bringing us back to scripture. It's well worth reading.

[T.K. CHAPMAN · Rating 5 out of 5]

At just over a hundred pages, this is a quick read, but it tackles a few heavy questions. Why hasn't God answered that prayer? Why am I in this situation? What do I really believe about God? Pollock shares her story (and others) as she outlines a way to respond to the "if onlys" in our lives. Really liked that she included some practical things to do as we move toward contentment.

[HelenA33 · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a lovely little book! So often I have wrestled with an "if only...". The author helps us to focus on the giver of life, not just on His blessings, and find contentment in Him. Sound advice written in an accessible, chatty style.

[Beverley · Rating 5 out of 5]

Read this for a church book group and I'm so glad I did! Very wise, Biblical advice and the real stories illustrated that you don't always get what you want (but you get what God wants which is better).
Looking forward to discussing this next week.

[Jane Dingcong · Rating 5 out of 5]

Words of wisdom 💖 great book!

[Erika Renee Lowry · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a must-read for the woman who is struggling with life not turning out the way you hoped. I was very encouraged with rich truth and personal stories.

[Lauren · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book, the author dropped truth bombs every few pages or so to really make you stop and think. She writes with a deep understanding of gospel love and grace, while having lived in the trenches of suffering and asking the hardest questions. The empathy and warmth compared to someone who writes academically about suffering biblically is the difference between hearing about a battle from a soldier vs an armchair historian. Wisdom only gained from having lived through the hardest times faithfully. One to return to time and time again for reminders and reassurance!

[Abigail Gammon Barzilla · Rating 4 out of 5]

simple, honest, practical, and filled with scripture. the title says it all, but pollock does a good job of challenging the reader to fix their eyes on jesus with real life and biblical examples.

[Rhence Sapinoso · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love this book that i reread it! Such a good and timely reminder for when you’re struggling with finding peace and contentment.

[Allison Stanton · Rating 3 out of 5]

Pretty good quick read, but not a devotional I'd return to.

[Autumn Harrison · Rating 3 out of 5]

Quick read that a friend gave me. I would not have picked this for myself.