It's Good to Be a Man: A Handbook for Godly Masculinity

by Michael Foster

Men were made to rule. They always have and always will. Nothing can change that. Nothing will. It is not a question of whether men will be ruling, but which ones and how.

Our modern society has called for us to “smash the patriarchy”, and the church has not done much better. Instead of telling men how they can hone and refine their aggressive traits, the church has told men that they should aspire to be meek servant-leaders, and when a man shows any signs of independence, he is shown the door.

This leaves most young men lost. They don’t know what to do or how to improve, so they watch Jordan Peterson videos on YouTube to learn how to grow in their masculinity and sense of mission. In this book, Michael Foster and Bnonn Tennant remind men that their natural aggressive instincts are gifts from God that are meant to be used for the kingdom.

Men are supposed to found households, join brotherhoods, and work toward a mission. It's Good to Be a Man offers men a quick guide to where they are and how they can improve. God made men to be strong and aggressive risk-takers. This is a feature, not a bug. Foster and Tennant remind us that it’s good to be a man.

Genres: Theology, Christian, Christian Living, Nonfiction, Family, Cultural, Leadership

Audible Audio

Published February 1, 2022

About the author

Michael Foster is a pastor in Batavia, Ohio, and the cohost of the It's Good to Be a Man podcast. He's married to Emily, and they have a bunch of Foster children. It's Good to Be a Man: A Handbook for Godly Masculinity, coauthored with Dominic Bnonn Tennant, is his first book.

(Note for Goodreads editors: This Michael Foster has seven spaces between first and last name to disambiguate. Seven is the number of perfection, so he's obviously the best Michael Foster there is.)

Reviews

[John Damon Davis · Rating 2 out of 5]

A Hollow and Crude Failure at True Biblical Manhood.

Although Foster and Tennant may have been attempting something noble, the result of their work ends up undercutting true masculinity. The “masculinity” displayed in "It’s Good to be a Man" looks more like the sinful, self-obsessed manhood of the world than the sacrificial manhood of Christ’s kingdom. The humble, compassionate masculinity of Jesus is scarcely to be found, replaced instead by far too much of the brash, self-exalting masculinity of Barabbas. Strong Biblical Manhood is wonderful, and I agree with Foster and Tennant that it is indeed nearly forgotten today, but I fear that there is little of it to be found in this book.

Perhaps I am being so hard on them because we share so much common ground; I also have high expectations for authentic Christian masculinity. All in all, I probably agreed with 60-70% of the book. As a reformed complementarian, I sympathize with the impetus behind this book. I too am alarmed by the number of listless young men in my life who turn to secular life coaches like Jordan Peterson for purpose and guidance instead of Christianity. But the answers we give cannot just be what they want to hear. Instead, we are to give them the difficult, but Biblical truth.
Far too much of "It’s Good To Be a Man" was a display of self-pitying rhetoric about how terribly society has abused men and how if men were just allowed to act out their true selves, things would be better. The authors frequently fling about Incel internet subculture slang (E.G. Red, Blue and Black pills; Alphas and Betas… etc) and refer to their presumed readers as “Functional Bastards.” Even though these sections are sometimes followed up by a call to action, they fail to take into account that society is not singling them out. In our modern era, every group is sabotaged by the fallen world. Rather than resentfully wallowing in conspiracies and blame, we should man up and simply acknowledge the fallen nature of our society, move on and look to where we can help others.

"It’s Good To Be a Man" could have achieved far more if it spent more time pointing to the cross and less time belittling women. For a book about the blessings of manhood, it spends an astonishingly high number of pages complaining about women. Women “always descend in emotional, mystical chaos” (pg. 92) and strong women are “butch and unnatural”(148). Women are portrayed as crafty manipulators wanting to use men for their own success and are only put into check by man’s domination (See 145 and much of Church Effeminate). Foster and Tennant describe in far too much detail how women are immodest without even acknowledging the sin of those leering at them.

However, by far the greatest danger of this book is its faulty theology. This is a real pity because I did especially enjoy their focus on the danger of androgenizing the soul. To reiterate, on paper, Foster, Tennant and I are nearly identical theologically, which is why I was astonished to discover some of their wild leaps. Most of the theology of the book is fairly solid, but in this case, a wee bit of poison ruins the whole meal. They write: “male and female are an image of the creator and creation…the principle of male and female doesn’t originate in Adam and Eve, but in God and creation”(61). Such a position rings of the “Mother Earth/Father Sky” cosmology and not at all of biblical anthropology. Male and female are biological concepts alien to God prior to the incarnation. To hold what they propose would require one to suppose that God is to creation what Adam is to Eve. There is an infinite divide between creator and creation. If what they say is true, all women ought to worship all men for eternity. The truth however is that maleness and femaleness are rooted in the physical reality of our bodies both of which are completely and equally Imago Dei (Gen 1:27). The other major flaw in their premise is the supposed existence of uniquely masculine sins and virtue and uniquely feminine sins and virtues (In fact they go so far as to claim that Christianity itself is fundamentally masculine). Sin is sin. Holiness is Holiness. They will manifest in different ways in different people.
Where is the masculinity of Jesus in all this? They say that the church has overemphasized servant leadership, but if we look around us today, I would say we are in more need than ever of men willing to humble themselves and act like they are in the kingdom of God where the first shall be last and the last shall be first. They are right to point out that Christ will also be a conquering king as well as a sacrificial lamb, but they forget when we live. Until Christ comes again we are to imitate the example of Stephen, not the zealots of 70AD. Their ideal Christian man would sneer at the martyrs of old. They seemed to have missed the memo about the upside-down kingdom of God. If the goal is to be self-controlled wise men, the book spends little of its time exemplifying that. Crude language and uncharitable attitudes abound through the pages. Their opponents are made into straw men and called names. I trust that It’s Good To Be a Man is a bad example of the real-life manhood of its authors. I am sure they respect their wives and cherish their children and encourage their congregations to live lives in imitation of Christ, but this book has far too little of that.
The good motive which spurred Foster and Tennant to write this book cannot make up for its failure to exemplify the gospel. I am sorely disappointed with this book. I had high hope it would be a winsome theologically sound work I could recommend to some of my listless friends to point them to Christ-like masculinity, but unfortunately it is not. I believe God has a high calling for the men of the church in all their occupations. We are to be strongly courageous and kindly humble. Men are to be heads of their households, but only insofar as they are willing to submit to serve them as Christ served the church. It is not easy to be the type of man God calls us to be, but it is good!


p.s. There are many quotes I could take out of context but I stuck with those which I could justly use loyally to their context.

[Woelke · Rating 1 out of 5]

I felt obligated to read this book. I saw quotes attributed to its authors online and thought the quoters must have removed necessary context. Surely these authors — men of faith, pastors, would-be church leaders — didn’t actually say that. Surely the quotes were defamatory or out of context.

Nope, they really did say all that stuff, and it’s laid out plainly in the book: men see women as sex objects, while women see men as success objects (and this is… good?). Men are smarter than women. Men should embrace patriarchy, forcefully, since aggression is not sinful and is part of God’s pre-fall plan for men. Women occupy a status below men and one step above animals. Don’t believe me that this is what the book says? Read the book—it’s all there. Now that I’ve read it, I can point you right to it.

The book reads like a tract written by a pair of middle school students who are flunking logic. The biblical exegesis is laughable. The authors divide up the Genesis 1 dominion mandate according to their preferences, with some clauses becoming the responsibility only of men and others only of women—never mind that God instructs Adam and Eve at the same time, together. They claim “all leadership” in Scripture is “exclusively male,” apparently forgetting about Deborah and Esther (among others). In this book, wisdom is one of “a triad of masculine virtues”—never mind that wisdom is personified as a woman in numerous places in Proverbs.* And—also like giggling middle schoolers—life is all about sex, which “is the most powerful and constant drive in our lives.” More: “Sex is the engine of God’s dominion: the means by which He designed man to establish heaven on earth.” Nothing about grace here, nothing about worship, nothing about the work of Christ—nope, here, salvation arrives when men have sex with women.

(*To be fair, the authors do mention Lady Wisdom twice. But they found her only in Proverbs 31, where the authors refer to this woman as “the prize to be gained by rightly navigating the treacherous waters of your fallen masculine drives.” The rich portrayal of Lady Wisdom in the first chapters of Proverbs—particularly chapters 8-9–is absent, presumably because it doesn’t fit the book’s narrative of masculine superiority.)

The authors’ ecclesiology is also strained. Is the Church the bride of Christ? Not here; those references are abandoned. Instead, the church is “a spiritual family fathered by the heavenly Patriarch” (a conclusion that echoes Mormonism more than historic Christianity). The church is constituted of households, not people, which for these authors means men are in charge. The authors even imply that the only way to oppose women’s ordination is to find men and women spiritually distinct before God—never mind pesky verses like Galatians 3:28.

But the most egregious failing is one these authors appear not even to have considered. They ignore God’s Triune nature (the Trinity is mentioned only once and in passing). Instead, the authors focus on rule, submission, and authority—the Father over the Son, men over women, husbands over wives, church leaders over their congregants. The rich complexity of Trinitarian theology is absent, as is any hint of the fundamental implications for human flourishing that flow out of God’s triune nature. Hyper-patriarchy of this sort simply isn’t Trinitarian, and the book’s failure even to discuss the Trinity is a revealing oversight.

There are a few good items, especially toward the end. But the good is outweighed by the garbage. And the book is also illogical to the point of parody—at one point, the authors criticize any man who has ever consulted YouTube for information. (It’s unclear whether using Google Maps counts as asking for directions.) They accuse women who wear yoga pants or too much makeup of participating in “harlotry.” They claim that the hands of modern men are physically weaker than in bygone era; now men shake like women. (If you want a citation for this bizarre claim, you’re in the wrong book. True men don’t have to cite their sources.)

The authors, editors, and publishers should all be ashamed of themselves for publishing this book. It’s embarrassing. The authors must be hoping you won’t read your Bible to check their work—after all, they appear not to have read theirs either.

[Stephanie Cunningham · Rating 1 out of 5]

Though it may be contrary to my feminine social instincts to risk ruffling anyone’s feathers, I must say that I thought this book was ridiculous. In fairness, my husband is not looking over my shoulder right now, so my feminine influence is not being actively checked by masculine rule, and perhaps I have descended into mystical, emotional chaos.

[Jeremy]

I mention the book here. Email exchange here. Some negative comments here, but Michael responds well.

TGC reviews it here, although not very charitably. The reviewer claims that men's virtues are promoted at the expense of women, failing to realize, apparently, that the book is written to respond to a particular cultural moment that says masculinity is inherently toxic. The book isn't meant to be a comprehensive approach to human sexuality, even though it does take some time to praise virtuous women. My take is that It's Good to Be a Man intentionally engages in some hyperbole as a means to correct the excesses in the other direction, and a charitable reading would prevent a reader from assuming that there are no qualifiers or nuance. Only poor readers presume that focusing on one element is necessarily downplaying everything else.

Here's a CBMW review, and here's Foster's response.

[Rick Davis · Rating 5 out of 5]

The information in this book is similar to other books on biblical masculinity. However, this book stands out with its intensely practical focus. How do you take a biblical view of manhood and start applying it to your life? As a result, this book is also quite convicting. In a culture of "clueless bastards" this is a much needed push in the right direction toward acquiring wisdom and building gravitas.

[Natalie · Rating 1 out of 5]

I changed my review from ** to *. I see the authors saying, “this isn’t a book about women” to their critics. And while it’s not about women, their own words speak about women extensively. Here are real quotes from the book:

“Women will always be tempted to remove discomfort. This happens even with the best women….either way, biblical Christianity requires discomfort because it requires discipline…” p89

“For churches, feminine social instincts are inversely proportional to ensuring orthodoxy.” p91

“A church in which the influence of women is not checked by masculine rule-where, indeed, it is instead elevated and amplified-will always descend in mystical emotional chaos. We exist to please God. It is impossible to build true religion on the false assumption of the opposite. Unfortunately, even pious women tend to lead us in that opposite direction if unchecked.”p92

“Again, women can be known for workmanship, and they should seek to develop it. They worship through service also. But workmanship is about more than simply doing; it is about becoming useful. This is a uniquely masculine quality.” p146-147

“God has made us to live in relationships. A man should be able to rely on himself-but “it is not good that the man should be alone.” He needs both the right woman and the right men in his life. Together they are the two rails that keep his train on track. A tribe and a helpmeet will stabilize, direct, and magnify his mission.” ch13

“It is a key milestone for a man, and a massive step forward, when he finds a wife. She is the second rail, running parallel to fraternity, that supports him, carries him forward, and keeps his mission on track.” ch13

“There is a way of women, and a way of men; and while they have much in common, there are major differences. There are things about women that men will only understand in a theoretical sense, and the reverse is also true. Hence women need a sisterhood; they need a close group united around shared emotion.” ch 13

The following is part of a story from a soldier that the authors use to “capture the male need for brothers on a mission.” “In war, he had a clear mission-and a fraternity that kept him company, kept him focused. He had a band of brothers, and in truth that mission and those brothers were more precious to him that his own wife. He writes, ‘Despite my resolve never to return to a combat environment, I’d signed up once more amid the height of insurgent violence. That deployment would cost me my marriage. I’d didn’t even have to go. I volunteered.’” NO clarity from the authors that this is bad, in fact, seems to be a positive example of male fraternity.

“Women are designed for different work: to fill the inward world, building a community. Thus, connecting with each other to establish social harmony is critical. Every woman must ensure her place by fitting into and conforming within the group. Because of this, meritocracies like true aristocracies, classical democracies, or biblical monarchies are masculine ideals. Feminine forms of government include flat democracies (everyone is equally competent), oligarchies (cliques), and committees (no one is responsible).”

FYI I’m an OPC attending, patriarchy affirming mother and wife, wondering how in the world this book is getting such rave reviews. 🙃

[Winnie Thornton · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the best books I’ve ever read. I devoured it like a novel. Biblical, bracing, powerful, gripping, easy to read, encouraging, and absolutely necessary. I felt like I had just watched Braveheart. Everyone should read this book. If you are a man, or you want to marry a man, or you’re raising future men, or you’re writing about fictional male characters, read this book. Order it now. Put it at the top of your list. You can’t afford to go without it. CHUTZPAH GALORE.

[John · Rating 5 out of 5]

There is a crisis in masculinity today that many have been working to address. Doug Wilson has written some good stuff on the topic, but nothing quite like this one. The closest comparison I can think of is Richard Phillips's excellent work "The Masculine Mandate". Comparisons between the two will be inevitable in my mind, as they are both written for the same kind of audience with much of the same kind of material.

The main strengths that resonated with me in this book is the visceral, creational normativity of masculinity. One of the things that is striking about this book is the way the authors work to unapologetically harness the way God made men. They do this by setting our masculinity crisis in the context of the feminization of the world.

God made men for specific tasks and so there is nothing disordered about man's strengths. But man's strengths need to be harnessed to fulfill God's dominion mandate. Don't fight against the way God made you--rather, use God's gifting to accomplish his purposes.

This book is inspiring and uplifting. This is what men need to hear today. God gave you a purpose and you can do it! Man up!

Highly, highly recommended.

[Victor Chininin · Rating 1 out of 5]

A book full of straw men and sweeping generalizations that don’t hold up. It is easy to insult straw men and do so repeatedly. If you read the higher rating reviews they all say this. They just overlook, dismiss, and justify it. I can’t imagine how someone who does not yet know Christ could see Jesus in these pages. Yet, their argument is precisely that such is the way of men. This book devalues women, and I’m sure just for writing that I will be placed in their stereotype of the effeminate man in the effeminate church. However, it needs to be said. I wish the authors would explicitly say what their statements and questions imply with statements like “you need a wife to complete your mission”: that women are nothing but tools to be used to further the man’s mission.

[Kyle Grindberg · Rating 5 out of 5]

Outstanding, it's best book on biblical masculinity that I have read.

[Dr. David Steele · Rating 5 out of 5]

Books about masculinity are a dime a dozen. A few books that address the topic of masculinity break this pitiful mold. These books direct men to the Bible as our highest authority. These books challenge men to be men of the Book. They challenge men to see their unique role in the framework of the Christian worldview; one that follows the trajectory of redemptive history. The most recent book that breaks the mold and stands out in a decisive way is It’s Good To Be a Man by Michael Foster and Dominic Bnonn Tennant.

The goal of the authors is “to help modern Christian men understand what God made them for, and how to start doing it intentionally.” Foster and Tennant state their goal upfront and don’t waste any time in achieving it. The book begins on what some would consider being controversial as the topic of patriarchy is discussed. Readers committed to the authority of God’s Word know better, though.

“Patriarchy is inevitable,” writes Foster and Tennant. “God has built it into the fabric of the cosmos. It is part of the divine created order … Redemptive history is therefore patriarchal history.” Critics who charge the authors with male chauvinism should tread carefully since the case for biblical patriarchy is carefully developed:

Men were made to rule. They always have and always will. Nothing can change that. Nothing will. It is not a question of whether men will be pulling, but which ones and how.

The reason patriarchy is so controversial is that sin has distorted it and twisted it. We even find patriarchy distorted in the church, a sin that will pay a high price in the final analysis. Foster and Tennant explain, “Although our culture treats all patriarchy as evil, God’s father-rule is good. Evil patriarchy is that which does not reflect God’s loving authority.” The heartbeat of the authors, then, is to expose evil patriarchy and extinguish it wherever they can. But positively, they aim to explore the beauty and richness of patriarchy and how it fits into God’s redemptive program. The remainder of the book reveals the purpose of God in creating men and practical steps to fall in step with his revealed will.

God’s purpose in creating man is “for productive, representative rulership. This is what it means to exercise dominion: to fruitfully order the world in God’s stead.” This purpose sounds strange and even offensive to the unregenerate mind, yet God’s purpose stands. Tragically, God’s purpose is being modified and marginalized by people who are professing Christians.

After carefully dismantling the arguments of anyone who militates against God’s purpose in creating men, the authors provide practical steps for fulfilling God’s revealed will. The argument is as follows:

A mission is your best effort at wisely integrating your interests, skills, and circumstances into a personal vision for exercising dominion over what God has given you.

Practical help is offered so men can move forward in achieving their mission, which propels them forward in carrying out God’s purpose in creation. It’s Good To Be a Man is not for the faint at heart. It will provoke. It may even offend at times. But in the end, it will lead men on a path that glorifies the Creator of the cosmos.

I’ll never forget when my Uncle Dwight challenged me to read The Christian Mind by Harry Blamires. He said, “If you’re a real man, you’ll read this book.” I offer the same challenge to readers of my blog: “If you are a real man, you’ll devour It’s Good To Be a Man!”

Now is the time for Christian men to step up and obey God (1 Cor. 16:13-14) Now is the time for mature manhood (Eph. 4:13). It's time to love our wives as Christ loved the church (Eph. 5:25-33) and bring our children up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord (Eph. 6:4). Kill sin by the power of the Spirit (Rom. 8:13). Walk according to the Spirit (Gal. 5:16). Pursue holiness (Heb. 12:14). Work with our hearts as unto the Lord (Col. 3:23-24; 1 Cor. 10:31). It's good to be a man!

[Amy Edwards · Rating 1 out of 5]

This is a terrible book. I gave it one star only because if I gave it zero stars, you would think I forgot to rate it.

I’m not going to invest the time in refuting here all the false claims, hasty generalizations, and stereotyping of women put forth in the book. But be warned. It’s horrible and I hate that well-meaning men are snookered into thinking they are finding a Biblical vision of masculinity and marriage in this book. Here’s a taste for you from chapter 3:

“Sex is the engine of dominion—what does that mean? It means that the union of male and female in one flesh drives mankind forward in their created purpose of bringing heaven to earth by establishing God’s rule.

“While it is easy to think of the two halves of the creation mandate as being fitted for Adam and Eve respectively, this is not quite right. Adam is best fitted to subduing the world, and Eve is best fitted for filling it. But these duties of dominion fall on them both, because the creation mandate is given to mankind collectively. So as the head, the patriarch Adam is responsible for filling just as much as his is for subduing.

“Mankind’s duties to God therefore require the cooperation of the sexes. This, too, is part of God’s design, and nowhere is this more obvious than in man’s libido. Just as his aggressive desire to rule and subdue is God-given, so is his powerful desire for sex. Remember, the dominion God made us for is *fruitfulness*. Sex is the engine that drives fruitfulness.”

So basically, in their view, the woman’s part in this cooperation is to receive her husband’s seed and bear children. And the creation mandate is viewed through a lens of aggressive power (subdue) and sex. Good grief. Stay away from this book.

For a Biblical take on manhood and on masculinity, with a serious approach that is compassionate to men and women as equal image-bearers of their Creator, go read Nancy Pearcey’s book The Toxic War on Masculinity (2023).

Here’s what she says about the creation mandate (p. 158):

“A more biblical solution would be to cultivate a richer understanding of the cultural mandate. As we saw in earlier chapters, the cultural mandate includes two tasks: to be fruitful and to exercise dominion over the earth (Genesis 1:28). When God created the human race, he did not start with a lone individual—a heroic man surveying an original wilderness. He created a couple. And they were married. Marriage and family are part of the original blueprint. They are essential to who we are. Men do not find their true self by escaping from relationships and riding off into the sunset like a lone ranger. They find their authentic manhood in their core relationships: to God, their wife, their children, their extended family. The phrase “be fruitful” also means to build up the social institutions that historically *grow out* of the family: churches, schools, businesses, governments, charities, and community associations.

“The phrase “exercise dominion” means to be inventive with the rich resources built into creation. Because human beings are made in the image of the Creator, they are commanded to be sub-creators. They are to investigate the natural world and use its properties to be productive, to invent new technologies, to generate goods and services—in short all the arts and sciences…God’s purpose for humanity is to fulfill our gifts in meaningful vocations. To build civilizations. To make history.

“The best strategy for men to validate their identity, then, is to roll up their sleeves and invest more deeply in their families and in creative work that builds up and benefits the human community.”

It’s Good to be a Man is horrible. Beware.

[Josiah Richardson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I admittedly did not expect to enjoy this book as much as I did. I harbored a negative bias towards Foster for a couple different reasons not pertinent to this review. But this was actually really great. We live in a culture where the very question of what it means to be a man or a woman is now not only contested, but outright denied. What I expected to find in this book was the typical argument for what it means to be a man. Which means that I expected high emphasis on the brute force, machismo, lumberjack with a Bible motif. Where the wife looks like that 1950’s trad-wife who waits hand and foot on her husband. I grew up in a form of the patriarchal movement where women were genuinely taught they were lesser than men. As Foster and Tennant show, the man as man is best expressed when he is with whom God made for Him, namely his woman.

The majority of this book is just common sense advice that a young man (or an old man who never got the memo) needs to hear regarding responsibility. Responsibility is quite possibly the biggest task given to man and the fulfillment of those responsibilities is his summum bonum. His responsibility to God, to his wife and family, to his church and church family, to his state and nation, and so on, are the key reasons why men exist. The best types of men are those who are faithful to those responsibilities. This plays itself out in a number of ways of course, but it should not be neglected that there is more to a man than what is between his legs. The biology certainly matters, and this is not playing into the leftist hands when I make that comment. I simply mean that biological men are very rarely Biblical men in the proper sense of the word. Simply existing does not give you a participation trophy. God calls for men to be a man as Christ modeled for us. Again, Foster and Tennant work this out carefully. There were more than a few paragraphs that I disagreed with, but the overall thrust of the book was too good to make this a point of contention. Overall, a worthwhile book that won’t be calling for men to join the military, or cut down trees, or joining that bodybuilding evangelical Power Team of the 90’s. They have a much higher calling.

[Becky Pliego · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a fantastic book! This is not only an important book for men, but also for women to read. It really is a must read.

[Carson Wagner · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow. That was a slap in the face. Bro is NOT pulling any punches. Really, really good tho: every man should be required to read this.

[Rachel Ramey · Rating 5 out of 5]

Let me start by pointing out that I am not the target audience for this book. I will never be a man. However, I have a father, a husband, and a son, and minister to women who are married to men and who have sons, so I was interested in knowing firsthand the usefulness of this book as a resource for these others in my life.

It's excellent. The message is biblical and timely. The tone is direct -- no punches pulled -- but simultaneously gracious, not unduly brash. Much of what is in here strikes so solidly at the heart of what Christianity IS, in practice, that it's a foundational message.

I have almost no disagreements with this book. If I'm being incredibly nitpicky, there's a hint at the Sethite view of Genesis 6, which I disagree with. But the purpose of the book's passage stands or falls without that, and which view of Genesis 6 one takes is irrelevant to the message of It's Good to Be a Man. Those who aren't reading with a figurative microscope for review purposes may not even notice this.

I was almost a full 150 pages in before I came across a single sentence that would seriously give me pause. This sentence is the start of a 2-3-page section discussing what the authors consider uniquely masculine traits. I'm not sure I agree that the traits described are "uniquely" masculine -- but it's a very difficult exercise to identify any individual traits as specifically masculine or feminine. I agree with the authors that these are essentially masculine traits. If we concede the difficulty of articulating what makes someone definitively "masculine" and extend grace for the attempt to describe this in a useful way, emphasizing what men ought to develop rather than what women ought not to develop, there are no other major objections to this section.

Some readers may be initially taken aback by the use of the term "functional bastards" throughout. However, careful readers will also quickly realize this is not a flippant pejorative; the word "bastard" is used for its literal sense -- without fathers.

Who will benefit from this book? Men, obviously. The overall tone, language, and even the illustrations used are designed to appeal to men, and many women may not find them comfortable (although they aren't objectionable -- just not "soft"). It's ideal for those yet unmarried, and I would give this to an older teen. It does discuss sex frankly ('though not explicitly), so I wouldn't give it to a young boy, and would use discernment with younger teens so as not to become a stumbling block.

In a similar vein, I would recommend caution for wives reading this. I found the overall message edifying (and convicting), and there's some wording in here that I think will be helpful in parenting my young son. However, if you have a husband who struggles to be a strong and godly leader and/or you have a hard time with objectivity, this may be a stumbling block for you, creating discontent because you don't think he measures up. Know yourself before you dive in.

All in all, this is an excellent book, and a needed contribution to the Church.

[ValeReads Kyriosity · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent.

I was thirty years old before I received any faithful teaching on masculinity and femininity (thanks, Mark!). I've gotten lots since then (thanks, Doug and Nancy!), but there's always more to learn (thanks, Michael and Bnonn!).

Wade Stott is such a great addition to the Canon team — probably the best narration I've heard on a Canon audio. Just, please, bro...there is no ch in coveTousness!

[Lucas Dorminy · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is a very helpful resource for young men especially. I personally found their work on gravitas to be helpful for my own life and ministry. I’d recommend it to most young men in our church.

I think there are certain points that are a bit overstated (ex., finding “the one” being purely pagan), but these statements do not overshadow the wisdom of the rest of the book.

IGTBAM is a timely work that helps men reevaluate their priorities, skills, and mission as Christians in the world.

[Sal · Rating 5 out of 5]

Rating: 4.5/5 stars

Content warnings: Hard, direct wording, though not inappropriate: the harshness is called for. Concepts that will offend everyone.

Every Christian man should read this book if only to expose himself to these ideas. Don’t agree with all of them, I implore you. Wrestle with what irks you and figure out why. Adopt what inspires you and challenges you. Put simply: think.

The book is good. You know it’s good when it completely flips your perspective on a passage of scripture you’ve read and re-read countless times (Genesis 1 & 2).

That’s all I’ll say for now. Buying a physical copy as I listened to the audiobook and I know I’ll glean more if I can read the book in my hands and take notes.

[Ben Taylor · Rating 5 out of 5]

A book that will be good to return to on a regular basis, as the Biblical foundations of masculinity are under attack from every side these days.

I found several elements to be encouraging as God has cultivated fruit in my own life and experience (Christian brotherhood in particular seems to be a rarity and I am immensely thankful for who God has placed around me). Plenty of convicting elements to be sure, but Foster and Tennant convey everything in the form of a "charge" or motivational exhortation...and by that I mean as a reader I never felt smashed over the head with a bat. Instead, everything is grounded in clear foundation of the Scriptures and the empowering promises of Jesus through the gospel. I leave this book motivated to step up in the areas that need it, and to shore up what is already in motion by God's grace.

A fantastic foundation of Christian masculinity principles, one I would recommend all Christian men to read at least once.

[Joshua · Rating 5 out of 5]

I recommend this to all Christian men out there to read this book. The authors reminds us what it means to be a man according to what the Bible says. In our society right now we have weak men who don’t know what it means to be a man. I felt deeply encouraged but also convicted to be a better man that the Lord Jesus Christ has called me to be. It’s good to be a man. To want to lead, teach, take dominion over what God has put in our hands. Let all the Christian men out there read this book and rise up to be the men that God called them to be!

[Jubjub · Rating 1 out of 5]

I tried getting to the end. I got most of the way and just had to make a value assessment on my time spent reading this junk. At best there are parts that give scripture based surface level decent advice that would be good for anyone to follow not just men. At its worst it’s abhorrently sexiest and bigoted worse than anything the Bible subscribes to. While the Bible does talk about gender roles and their importance I’m just not on board with this narrow minded view of being a tyrannical ruler that has to dominate everything around me. The amount of times the word dominion appears is comical. There are several examples of just plain lazy thinking where foster would contradict himself within three pages, misuse or misattribute quotes, or cherry pick bad sources (when there were sources at all) to prove his point in the worst case of confirmation bias I have seen in a long time. This book goes beyond bad and finds itself in a dangerous category where I can totally see how a guy who is down on his luck or maybe had a run in with a bad relationship with a woman, could read this and become radicalized blaming society and women for all their woes in some kind of lowly incel type of thinking. This book really just paints women as useless and incompetent which is ironic because that’s how I would describe this authors opinions. His view on what masculinity looks like is extremely narrow and is very stereotypical in the worst ways. There could have been some interesting discussions on the nuance on what helpful masculinity looks like in a modern culture and to how navigate that, but this is truly just small weiner energy encapsulated in black and white from a guy who is over compensating from something he clearly did not have at some developmental stage in his life. Take your own advice foster and stop complaining (half this book is complaining about “modern culture” from a very terminally online culture war perspective) and do something useful.

[Steve · Rating 3 out of 5]

Here is another book on biblical masculinity, that underlines many of the issues men face, the crisis of gender and sexuality etc . That authors state the issues and outline of biblical material clearly and boldly. Another strength is the forthright and practical nature of the book.

The authors handle the dynamics of make and female, and we particularly strong on male comradely. The missional nature of being a man needs to be stressed today, and how the male/female dynamics feed that.

So there’s lots to like.

But there are several downsides, unnecessary unhelpful fault lines that tarnish the message.

1. There is such a stress on the good of masculinity that when it comes to a discussion of the church , the fact she is a Bride is all but obscured. “The church is masculine” we are told. We understand and accept the underlying criticism : churches alienate men through their insipidness etc. But nonetheless in Scripture the Church is always feminine as Zion, Jerusalem, and the bride of Christ. I don’t suggest for a moment that the authors dispute this, but in their justified desire to promote healthy masculinity the message distorts at this point.

2. Referring to fatherless men as “bastards” really doesn’t help. It creates an unnecessary barrier for some who might otherwise benefit from this book.

3. There are some stereotypical moments- e.g., all men must be big and strong. Getting the best girl..., Maybe all men must be Americans? Big and strong homesteader types. It’s all a bit much.

[Kofi Opoku · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very well researched and written. Unlike many books on masculinity, this one is impressive for how the authors developed their application from a strong theological core and stated it directly. A few sections had words that seemed to have been used for shock value. The chapter on gravitas was gold. Overall, a solid book that I would recommend every Christian man read.

[Luke · Rating 4 out of 5]

Reject the biddies.

[Robert Burgess · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thought this was very helpful and convicting in many areas. Written in plain speech, which makes it an easy read. Biggest takeaway is that man was created by God for a purpose, and it is good and right for men to fulfill that purpose, no matter what others say. Personally convicting in the area of man being designed to be on mission and establishing dominion over the world in some way. Other good chapters on fraternity and marriage.

[Peter Bringe · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is not a book about men and women and their differences, nor is it about marriage and family. The subtitle does a good job explaining its purpose, “A Handbook for Godly Masculinity.” Recognizing the twin threat of effeminacy/androgyny and sinfully corrupt masculinity, they direct men onward to act like men in a godly manner.

There are a few statements that could be problematic if read with suspicion, and a handful I might take exception to, but that shouldn’t distract from the helpfulness of the book as a whole.

[Benjamin · Rating 5 out of 5]

Simply phenomenal. Pick this up men and women and READ IT. For many it will be a paradigm shift in their singleness, marriage,, etc.
“Men were made to rule. They always have and always will. Nothing can change that. Nothing will. It is not a question of whether men will be ruling, but which ones and how.”

Men take godly dominion! I love how the book critiques some of the pagan ideologies in the world right now (feminism, egalitarianism, etc.) but it mostly focuses on the man, and him being molded and shaped after the pattern Scripture lays out for godly manhood! I commend it. Will be revisiting.

[Megan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Stellar book. Though it’s written for men, I read it because I have 3 sons and come from a family with a very quiet, withdrawn father who was dutiful and faithful but not overtly into leading, teaching, or shepherding his family. I wanted to understand more of what we’re shooting for in raising 3 sons, so I can see the vision and help my husband better as our oldest enters his teen years. This book was excellent for that. I think I’m better able to articulate ideas or intuitions about manhood that I had previously only been able to get as far as “this is just how it should be” in my thinking or conversation. This book helped put words and a framework to my thinking, and definitely helped me have a clearer picture of what we’re aiming for and what kind of large-scale concepts and virtues we can hang smaller-scale events, conversations, choices, discipline, etc. on as our boys grow up. It’s also given me helpful tools for talking with my daughter about what makes a good man, and I have no doubt that will be priceless as she gets older and starts considering marriage.

Four stars rather than five because I was a little put off by some of the language, but that may just be because it was written for men, not women, so I wasn’t exactly the target audience. But that was all really minor, and I could see how and why they were using their rhetoric the way they did, so it’s honestly a matter of taste. That, and because I usually reserve 5 star ratings for really spectacular life-changing or deeply moving literary masterpieces.

[Nick Solheim · Rating 5 out of 5]

Michael Foster and Dominic Bnonn Tennant's It's Good to Be a Man is the Christ-centered answer to red-pill Reddit, feminists, and limp-wristed evangelicals who refute men's godly duty to exercise dominion over creation, communities, and families. This book should be a priority for every Christ-following man in the West.

The authors expertly weave Scripture, metaphor, and life-experience together to create a handbook to building a moral compass tuned toward Christ. Foster and Tennant reclaim dominion, masculinity, and headship for men without devolving into women-hating, misogyny, or carelessness.

One of the greatest things about this book is its order. The authors emphasize that to become a man, one must first have a mission, and a brotherhood with which to conquer the mission. Only then will your life be ripe for finding a wife. It's Good to Be a Man is not a self-help book, it is not a guide to finding a wife, nor is it a guide to becoming a millionaire. It is a bright, flashing sign pointing men everywhere toward the headship of Christ Jesus.