Breathless

by Eric Chason

Lillian was a college freshman, a promising theater major facing the challenge of Stargardt’s disease, a condition that was causing her to go blind. When, in the fall of 2009, Lillian became sick, she assured her parents it was just the flu. Four days later she was in the university hospital, relying on a machine to breathe for her.

Based on her father’s journal, this memoir describes what it’s like to live through a parent’s worst nightmare, conveying the heart-wrenching ups and downs of Lillian’s time in the hospital. At the same time, it recounts the life of a remarkable young woman who, despite the gradual loss of her sight, was determined to finish high school, attend college far from home, and embark on an independent life.

This, her parents told each other, was the hardest struggle their daughter would ever face. Yet, as Lillian lay tethered to life-support, each day a parry against time, her father realized that every challenge his daughter ever faced was only a backdrop for these few, excruciating days in which she fought for her life.

ERIC CHASON is a professor of engineering at Brown University. All his other publications (more than 150 of them) are in technical journals that are rarely seen outside of libraries. This memoir is the first personal piece of writing he has published. He was compelled to write it, to tell the story of his daughter Lillian. It has no equations.

Audible Audio

Published January 9, 2024

Reviews

[Ginger Gritzo · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm giving this book five stars because of its topic and devastating end. My own daughter had H1N1 around the same time as his, and I'll never forget how helpless I felt while waiting for her to get better. I remember never wanting to leave her side, and laying close to her so I could hear her precious breaths. I cannot imagine how hard it was for them watching thier own daughter hooked up to machines with so many tubes and wires that there was only one place they could safely approach her one at a time. I cannot imagine how hard it was to have thier hopes rise and fall, sometimes multiple times in a single day. I cannot imagine how hard it was to say goodbye, and then have to drive back to thier home in Rhode Island and face life without her.

[Marsha · Rating 5 out of 5]

Heartfelt and heart wrenching! The interleaving of aspects of Lil's life with the sickness and suffering was well done; there was only one place where was temporarily unclear what the "current" timeframe was, but that cleared up. I know the authors brother Marc – have for 17 years or so – and I was unaware of the whole situation that clearly encompassed a lot of people. The narrative points out the desperation of the family, but it also makes it clear that everybody did do what he or she could. Such a sad story/situation, but it's affect on family members, doctors, friends, and probably total strangers was/is enormous.
As a "reader" who is legally blind, I am extremely happy that the author did, eventually, come out with a Kindle version which I could then convert to EPUB and have read to me! For me it's the optic nerves, and I can relate to a lot of the visual problems. Thank you.

[JennOM · Rating 5 out of 5]

Profound and heartbreaking. I contracted influenza and pneumonia in 2014 and, after spending 2 1/2 weeks in the hospital (11 days in a medically induced coma), I was fortunate enough to walk out of the hospital.

My heart goes out to the Chason family. This is a beautiful tribute to Lil.