Heroin's Puppet - Amy and Her Disease: The Rehab Journals of Amelia F.W. Caruso

by Melissa M. Weiksnar

Amy Caruso was a junior in the nursing program at Boston College and seemed to have everything going for her - brains, beauty, athleticism, career goals, a loving family, and many wonderful friends. But in November 2009, she admitted she was a heroin addict and voluntarily entered treatment. Five weeks later she died from an overdose at the treatment facility on the day after Christmas, weeks shy of her twenty-first birthday.

Melissa Weiksnar attended Wellesley College and is a graduate of MIT, Harvard Business School, and the University of Houston. After 20 years in the high-technology industry, she changed careers to high-school teaching. Since Amy died, Melissa has been telling Amy's story to school, college, community, and religious groups to help others understand how addiction is an equal opportunity disease. She and her husband have two older children and live in Massachusetts.

Genres: Audiobook

Audible Audio

First published July 27, 2012

Reviews

[Mkittysamom]

My first observation is...how can a teacher in the 2000's not have a clue about drugs? High School....come on? I really felt the mother did her daughter an injustice and the title is FALSE. This is the detailed account of the mother's suspicions about her daughter Amy. I have more to say, but I was really angered by this book. Also it is like 400 pages
Long.... And after poor Amy dies..everyone dances around in glee! Wtf?

[Kay McCallum]

This book made me feel sick to my stomach. Not because of the young girl battling with addiction, but because of her horribly self absorbed mother. She basically said she felt relieved that her daughter died, seemed to be worried about her weight more than her 14 year old daughter, and hardly took action to protect her. I know this was the early 2000’s, but come on. You’re told your daughter was snorting drugs at a sleepover and you continue to let her drive herself around, hang out with known dealers and sleepover at her friends houses constantly? Not to mention the condescending tone the mother uses to imitate Amy (it is narrated by her). This all of the mothers journals too, by the way, hardly anything from Amy. Disgusting.

[Terry]

I wanted to like this mom, but I just couldn't. Her daughter's death is a tragedy and I feel for her. I couldn't get past her privilege at not knowing so much. She comments about not getting help from professionals and then says she decided not to follow what they said. Pick up a different memoir to learn about the tragedy of addiction.

[Morgan]

Terribly boring and way too long. So many details of things that really didn't matter. Author would tell you that she went to the store at 8:03, then bought a coffee at 8:46. Not an exact quote, but yikes! I kept listening (audiobook) hoping it would get better. It was extremely rough.

[Jake Sylvestre]

I've been reading up on some of the inadequacies in the medical system since Covid broke out and the opiate epidemic is definitely a huge one. I was looking for a first-hand account to supplement some of the statistics/clinical material I've looked at and this one was pretty enlightening.

The name is a misnomer - most of the book is the experiences of the mother. Pervasive warning signs, punishments/rewards to try to modify the daughter's behavior and emotionally wrenching conversations are replete throughout the book. What's missing is almost any first-hand accounts from Amy. Turns out those are contained in a second book - "It's Not Gunna Be an Addiction: The Adolescent Journals of Amelia F. W. Caruso (1989 - 2009)". I'd recommend that one over this for anyone looking for a first-hand perspective on the opiate epidemic in adolescents.

What the mother does provide is a heart-wrenching profile of the challenges that come with raising an addict or someone with a bipolar personality disorder. No one should have to go through this.

[Jad]

An extremely detailed account of how a young woman's tragic opiate addiction negatively impacted her mother's very important running schedule.

[Geneiveve “Annie” Jannetti]

This heartbreaking, yet powerful, memoir is relatable for anybody who has had a loved one fighting addiction. It is informative for those who haven’t had this experience, and gives a very emotional account of the tragedy drug abuse causes. As a parent, there were many times I had to hold back tears while reading this story.

[Skylar Fox]

This book was a great insight into how addiction affects families/parents of an addict. I was disappointed by the title because it’s maybe 5% Amy’s journals. I still found the book insightful and learned from it.

[arielle]

Audiobook

[Ashleigh Curtis]

Insightful, glad I read it.
Not a must read through.
I can see why people think the mum was very self absorbed and self indulgent but I think she was just writing what she knows and she can only write from her own experience and it would be false of her not to have written the book how it was written.
Also religious people annoy me.

[Anna Kathryn Kilby]

I’m honestly not super sure like why I read this. Touching and heartbreaking but the mom/author’s naïveté and excessive details did dock it for me

[Megan]

I always find it interesting to read memoirs, even if I ultimately am disappointed in the outcomes or conclusions - clearly it is someone’s truth or opinion, so although I might personally disagree, it’s not my story. That was certainly the case here.

The author (the mother of the deceased) seems incredulous, through to the last page, that addiction could’ve touched a “family like theirs”. She always seems to be trying to “solve” the disease so they can get on with their lives. She constantly complains about not receiving any support or advice on what to do. However, she also states MULTIPLE times that a counselor recommended a seemingly helpful action to which she says “but I didn’t end up doing that” or “I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to do that”.

Overall very interesting, but wholly unlikeable.

[Jimi-carol Benton]

Lots of thoughts and feeling on this book. First, this is not a book that follows Amy’s rehab journey. It is actually the journal entries and thoughts of Amy’s mother over Amy’s life that include the stress and emotional tramas working up to Amy admitting her addiction, entering rehab, her OD and the grieving process afterwards. I greatly appreciate the mothers openness in sharing this story. She is not an expert with advice and tips but instead hopes that by sharing this story other people can use it to better understand their own journey with addicted loved ones and maybe even make better choices that change the out come of their own story.

[Raija Johnson]

This book read like going through someone’s planner. I appreciated the fact based story telling, but it was kind of harsh to hear the mother’s opinions at times. I suppose that’s the truth tho. Absolutely heartbreaking how Amy was struggling but so good at hiding her addiction. Hearing how high functioning she was made me think twice about the stereo types of addiction are. This book told an important story and I’m glad I got to hear it.

[Kiarah Hewitt]

ALMOST DNF and I honestly should have. While the story is interesting, I felt like the author (mom of Amy, the addict) lacked any sort of perspective and I really didn’t care for the way she seemed to prioritize her running schedule and physical appearance. These and related things are talked about at length, to such a degree that you’ll almost forget what the story is about. I also can’t get over the way she basically says that her life was better/easier after her daughter died; that may be her truth, but I don’t have to like that she wrote a book about it. Overall, it’s way longer than it needs to be considering the extreme lack of substance.

[kendal williams]

2.5// I listened to the audio book and while it was extremely sad to hear about amelia’s story the mom made it so hard to have any sympathy for her. It is genuinely shocking that she managed to make her daughters struggle with addiction about her.

[Erika Barton]

I had to read this for a college course and was hooked on this book and the story. Absolutely amazing

[Corvo]

DNF 65%

[Grace Otto]

I have thoughts. They are not good thoughts. But my heart aches for this family.

[fiona106285839]

why is she telling you the exact time irrelevant things happen? like ok 5 years before ur daughter overdosed you are a piece of broccoli at 5:03 pm