Parenting with a Story: Real-Life Lessons in Character for Parents and Children to Share

by Paul Smith

Tell a young person what to do - play fair, be yourself, stick to the task at hand - and most will tune you out. But show them how choices and consequences play out in the real world, with real people, and the impact will be far more profound. Parenting with a Story gathers 101 narratives from people around the world and from all walks of life, reflecting unexpected moments of clarity about who they are and how they should treat others. The lessons illuminate the power of character - integrity, curiosity, creativity, grit, kindness, patience, gratitude, and more - to prepare us for anything. Sometimes heart-wrenching, sometimes funny, always compelling, these stories impart wisdom and help steer choices



Resisting peer pressure Remaining open-minded Being humble Making courageous decisions Standing by their word Bouncing back from failure Showing compassion Picking friends wisely And more

Stories help shape who we are and who we aspire to become. Share these, discuss them, and watch your child grow into the adult you'll be proud of.

Genres: Parenting, Nonfiction

Audible Audio

First published January 1, 2014

About the author

PAUL SMITH is director of Consumer & Communications Research at The Procter & Gamble Company and a highly rated leadership and communications trainer for P&G’s management training colleges. He is the author of Lead with a Story: A Guide to Crafting Business Narratives that Captivate, Convince, and Inspire.

Reviews

[M.M.J. Gregory · Rating 4 out of 5]

Note: I received an advanced reader copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Paul Smith is trying to help moms and dads learn how to parent with stories. It's a lofty goal, but one that he accomplishes well. Science has proven that stories are far more likely to stay with us than the authoritative speeches we parents usually give and this book taps into that.

In part one, Smith weaves together tales of character traits like courage, creativity, and integrity. Part two takes on how we interact with the world and treat others. The stories come from around the globe, imparting an impressive collection of the positive and negative experiences of human existence. We meet average joes as well as well known characters, including one infamous president.

Most of the stories come from the teller's childhood, appropriate to the aims of the book. Many of them were engrossing, with far more staying power than the average parental anecdote. Each tale taking up less than a page or two makes the book a page turner, sometimes at the expense of substance. Smith states at the start that readers are unlikely to agree with the conclusion and reasoning of every story. This is almost certainly true as some of them come from conflicting viewpoints. I actually prefer it that way. Life is not one size fits all and the variety will allow parents to find stories that fit their lives and values with little tweaking.

The soundbite way the stories are presented often oversimplified the issues being discussed, but it is important to remember that the book is meant to be a jumping off point - a tool to start conversations with your child. That's where the real change happens. Each chapter starts with a quote and one seems appropriate here. Thomas Paine said, "What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly." The stories and ideas in the book are useless if they aren't utilized, but there is much to be gained from using it.

Smith thoughtfully included what he believed would be the most common barriers to using the book as intended along with online resources to overcome them. A story matrix at the back makes it easy to find any story the reader might be looking for. I would recommend this book to parents looking for an engaging book that will help them parent more thoughtfully and effectively.

[Cindy Hudson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Often the best way to help our kids learn something we think they should know is to tell a story that helps them see how others faced life situations. The trouble is, we often can’t think of relevant stories when the need arises. Paul Smith hopes to change that, with his book, Parenting With a Story: Real-Life Lessons in Character for Parents and Children to Share.

Smith has a background of finding success through telling stories. He is the author of Lead With a Story, which is geared to business people who are seeking success at work. Parenting With a Story moves that concept from the business world to the family. Exactly 101 stories are included in the book, culled from Smith’s acquaintances to match life lessons in more than 20 areas—humility, respect for others, and friendship, for instance.

In each case, Smith talks about the value or character trait and illustrates it with a couple of examples. I found all of the stories interesting and relevant, and found myself wanting to share them with my husband and daughters as I read. The challenge is remembering those stories and also coming up with real life examples from your own life when you find yourself needing to impart wisdom. Smith has suggestions for that too.

At the end of the book is a chart listing the subject of each chapter and the stories that illustrate the lesson. He also gives ideas for discovering stories of your own, which I think is particularly helpful.

Like Smith, I really believe telling stories is a more lasting way of getting a point across to your children than telling them what you think they should do. Anything that opens up conversation between the two generations, no matter how old they are, is likely to lead to more understanding and the passing on of wisdom and knowledge. Parenting With a Story should be a good resource for you to turn to over and over again.

The publisher provided me with a copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.

[Lauri · Rating 4 out of 5]

I received an ARC of this book from the publisher. It is a very accessible and appealing book, and, as the author suggests in the foreword, there are many different ways to use it. Paul Smith has collected personal narratives from people from all walks of life that touch on various themes: honesty, courage, peer pressure, resilience, perseverance, and many more. The writing is clear and, while some stories may resonate differently for different readers, there is something here for everyone. I think this would be a great book for all parents and teachers to have in their libraries. I've always used stories to help illustrate points or initiate discussion with my children and with my students (I once bought a copy of A Bargain for Frances by Russell Hoban to explain to my young daughter about how some friends can be "tricky"), and this book has plenty of great narratives to choose from. We all learn better from stories - that's why so many of us share the story of the boy who cried wolf with our kids - and that's why this book is a great tool for any parent or teacher's arsenal.

[Michelle Rolls · Rating 5 out of 5]

Check out his website because there is additional sheets to go with this book. They give you ways to use this book and how to start conversations with kiddos about the stories in this book. When re-telling these stories you will accommodate them to fit the audience (which is one thing he tells you to know in his book Lead With a Story)

[Logan Streondj · Rating 4 out of 5]

It was pretty good collection of stories, some were certainly tear jerkers, though some were also mundane run of the mill things. Too many for my taste were focused on like average people, sports and other things that it's hard to like resonate with, cause they just aren't relatable. But perhaps are good for like Joe average.

[Gayle Turner · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent, time well spent. It took me back to driving around in the pickup truck with my daddy as he told me stories. Great primer for young and old.

[Dann Ball · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a truly fantastic read! Lots of illuminating advice shared through a host of various personal stories. The book maybe titled 'Parenting with a Story' but do not let it fool you, it isn't just for parents looking to advise children. This book has will give you insight to other peoples experiences that will give you a better insight and understanding of the human condition. Placing the reader into the perspective of those with different experiences and how they overcame obstacles and gained individual characteristics.

Each chapter explores a different character trait which is shown in more detail in a table at the end of the book. The stories carry valuable commentary by Paul Smith. Paul Smith shows us just how valuable stories are at communicating messages. How they resonate more with audiences as the message is only hinted at by a talented storyteller and deciphered by the audience. Creating meaning and connection between Storyteller, Story and Audience.

You should also read Paul Smiths personal story, the letter that changed his life.

You will also find inside a story by myself on page 168. A story on how someone differs from hearing to listening. Hearing, being that its done with the intention to reply, give an answer. Where as listening has the intention of building upon a conversation or relationship and how question can help drive more engaging and meaningful conversations.

If you enjoy this book be sure to check out Paul Smiths first book 'Lead With A Story'.