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Not My Kid: A No-BS Guide to Stopping Predators
"I don't need to be violent," he said, his tone flat, like he was going through a grocery list. "Especially not with the small ones. I just make them feel like they're bad. Like it’s all their fault." —H. S., predator, during a therapy session
The most powerful weapon predators have is silence. This guide takes it away.
Not My Kid! is a no-fluff, straight-talking guide for parents who want to protect their children. Written by a former psychotherapist who worked with both survivors of abuse and the predators who harmed them, this short book delivers real talk, the right conversations, and the tools to raise a child predators don’t want to mess with.
The ebook is completely free. The paperback costs only what it takes to print and ship. The author makes nothing—because protecting kids is what matters.
The most powerful weapon predators have is silence. This guide takes it away.
Not My Kid! is a no-fluff, straight-talking guide for parents who want to protect their children. Written by a former psychotherapist who worked with both survivors of abuse and the predators who harmed them, this short book delivers real talk, the right conversations, and the tools to raise a child predators don’t want to mess with.
The ebook is completely free. The paperback costs only what it takes to print and ship. The author makes nothing—because protecting kids is what matters.
- GenresNonfictionSelf Help
74 pages, Kindle Edition
Published April 5, 2025
19 people are currently reading
45 people want to read
About the author
S.T. Ashman
7 books597 followersS. T. Ashman is a German-American writer born and raised in Germany, now calling the beautiful U.S. Seacoast home. She once delved into the criminal justice system as a psychotherapist, a role that gifted her with a unique insight into the human psyche—both the beautiful and the deeply shadowed. In another life, she’d be a trench coat-wearing, mystery-solving female Columbo. Her mother’s lineage traces back thousands of years to the Frisians, a fierce Germanic tribe from the north. A history lover to the core, she explores not only her own ancestry but also Indigenous cultures around the world. She weaves history and cultural awareness into action-packed fiction that keeps readers turning pages late into the night.
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Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews
April 23, 2025
Post
SPECIAL✶REVIEW
This is a different type of book review. One that every parent, family member, teacher, babysitter, (the list goes on and on) needs to read.
𝔑𝔬𝔱 𝔐𝔶 𝔎𝔦𝔡
< @booksbyashman >
Written and taught by a woman who spent years in the thick of this subject, this book offers a comprehensive look at what we can do to try and keep our kids safe. There’s no guarantees in life, but this book will give you the tools to have open and honest conversations. How to talk to kids. Steps to take, actions to plan.
While comprehensive, the book is super short and to the point. Told in everyday language - no PhD required to understand.
I wish I had had a book like this earlier in my life. Maybe it would have changed some things. I highly recommend this book to everyone. Pass along to your friends, sisters, other family members. It’s a gold pot full of useful info.
‼️Special: This book is FREE you only have to pay for the supplies to make the book and shipping $3.83‼️
LINK TO BUY IN MY STORIES - OR SS THIS LINK AND COPY/PASTE FROM YOUR PICTURES FOLDER: https://amzn.to/3YcEwnx
^ You can search the title and buy without using the link too
SPECIAL✶REVIEW
This is a different type of book review. One that every parent, family member, teacher, babysitter, (the list goes on and on) needs to read.
𝔑𝔬𝔱 𝔐𝔶 𝔎𝔦𝔡
< @booksbyashman >
Written and taught by a woman who spent years in the thick of this subject, this book offers a comprehensive look at what we can do to try and keep our kids safe. There’s no guarantees in life, but this book will give you the tools to have open and honest conversations. How to talk to kids. Steps to take, actions to plan.
While comprehensive, the book is super short and to the point. Told in everyday language - no PhD required to understand.
I wish I had had a book like this earlier in my life. Maybe it would have changed some things. I highly recommend this book to everyone. Pass along to your friends, sisters, other family members. It’s a gold pot full of useful info.
‼️Special: This book is FREE you only have to pay for the supplies to make the book and shipping $3.83‼️
LINK TO BUY IN MY STORIES - OR SS THIS LINK AND COPY/PASTE FROM YOUR PICTURES FOLDER: https://amzn.to/3YcEwnx
^ You can search the title and buy without using the link too
October 6, 2025
As a mother, I am keenly interested in ways to protect my precious young children from predators. I found this little book quite helpful; it describes how sexual predators think and act, and gives many ways to help children to be aware of danger. I appreciated the suggestions for how to talk to our children, to help them know how to respond if they are threatened. I found that very helpful. There is also a section for if a parent finds out something has already happened. I felt that section was too short to be helpful, but there were recommended resources to find help and healing.
I received a complimentary copy of this book from NetGalley, and these are my honest thoughts about it.
I received a complimentary copy of this book from NetGalley, and these are my honest thoughts about it.
July 11, 2025
Powerful, straightforward and practical, this guide should be on every parent, teacher and therapist's shelf and checked often. Despite the fact that the majority of the population has the biophysiological ability to have a child with another person, there is no such innate skills to know how to raise them. Creating a safe and nurturing environment in which kids can thrive and grow up feeling sheltered, seen, cared for, and accepted, is no easy feat, and one of the most horrendous threats that could shatter a child's sense of safety is that of child sexual abuse. Though still a taboo topic in many households and spaces, children are being groomed and preyed upon, mainly (over 90% of the time, in fact) by people who are meant to love and protect them such as their family members, family friends, neighbours, teachers, coaches and other figures who spend time with them.
In "Not My Kid!", Sensiba provides a no-nonsense account of the dreadful stats regarding CSA, and goes on to provide insight into how predators groom children. For every step in the process, this book offers several strategies and activities with which we can provide children with tools to know when something is not okay, what the alarm signs are, and how to talk to trusted adults about it. Something I hugely agree with is the vital importance of teaching children that their body belongs to them solely, and that nobody is entitled to getting physical touch from them regardless of how seemingly innocent the gesture may be or how inoffensive the person might look. As a child who despised hugs who was constantly told to "stop acting out and let Grandma hug and kiss you", I can attest to the huge difference that this makes for kids; particularly considering how often the predator turns out to be an uncle or aunt, a step-parent or step-sibling, a cousin, or any other family member.
This guide is an absolute "must" for anyone who either has children, or works with them, since it provides deep insight into the ways in which CSA can be prevented or acted upon by tackling the different factors that keep children silent about the abuse and/or in the dark about the nature of what has happened to them. I am definitely going to be getting myself a copy, as a therapist, and I would strongly recommend that every single mental health professional read the book. Abused children become traumatised adults who might start seeing a therapist, or even just their GP, for symptoms such as heightened anxiety, unexplainable headaches, C-PTSD patterns or eating disorders that do not seem to have a "clear" origin unless one knows the signs of CSA and builds a safe environment for the person to open up about what happened to them. It is our deontological duty to our patients to be well-equipped to know how to spot the signs, how to handle things when they open up, and how to help them heal - as well as to spread awareness and provide families with the right tools and strategies to prevent CSA by giving the child the language and skills to recognise when something isn't right.
Books like this make a difference. Allow yourself the opportunity to read what Sensiba's got to say, because you never know when you might be able to protect a child from lifelong trauma thanks to the knowledge provided.
In "Not My Kid!", Sensiba provides a no-nonsense account of the dreadful stats regarding CSA, and goes on to provide insight into how predators groom children. For every step in the process, this book offers several strategies and activities with which we can provide children with tools to know when something is not okay, what the alarm signs are, and how to talk to trusted adults about it. Something I hugely agree with is the vital importance of teaching children that their body belongs to them solely, and that nobody is entitled to getting physical touch from them regardless of how seemingly innocent the gesture may be or how inoffensive the person might look. As a child who despised hugs who was constantly told to "stop acting out and let Grandma hug and kiss you", I can attest to the huge difference that this makes for kids; particularly considering how often the predator turns out to be an uncle or aunt, a step-parent or step-sibling, a cousin, or any other family member.
This guide is an absolute "must" for anyone who either has children, or works with them, since it provides deep insight into the ways in which CSA can be prevented or acted upon by tackling the different factors that keep children silent about the abuse and/or in the dark about the nature of what has happened to them. I am definitely going to be getting myself a copy, as a therapist, and I would strongly recommend that every single mental health professional read the book. Abused children become traumatised adults who might start seeing a therapist, or even just their GP, for symptoms such as heightened anxiety, unexplainable headaches, C-PTSD patterns or eating disorders that do not seem to have a "clear" origin unless one knows the signs of CSA and builds a safe environment for the person to open up about what happened to them. It is our deontological duty to our patients to be well-equipped to know how to spot the signs, how to handle things when they open up, and how to help them heal - as well as to spread awareness and provide families with the right tools and strategies to prevent CSA by giving the child the language and skills to recognise when something isn't right.
Books like this make a difference. Allow yourself the opportunity to read what Sensiba's got to say, because you never know when you might be able to protect a child from lifelong trauma thanks to the knowledge provided.
May 25, 2025
Not My Kid! tackles one of the most urgent and under-discussed topics in parenting: how to protect children from sexual abuse. Denise Sensiba approaches this difficult subject with clarity, compassion, and a firm belief that prevention starts with education. As a parent, I found the book both accessible and essential—a much-needed starter guide for those unsure where or how to begin this conversation with their children.
The strength of Not My Kid! lies in its straightforward, non-alarmist tone. Sensiba does an excellent job breaking down a complex and emotionally charged issue into manageable steps. From teaching body autonomy to recognising grooming behaviours, the book offers practical strategies that caregivers can start using immediately. It’s brief enough to read in one sitting, but its impact lingers, especially considering the sobering statistics on child sexual abuse.
That said, I was troubled by moments where the language reinforces a blanket assumption that children are always safe with their parents. For example, the author suggests that children should be taught “No one should touch it [their private parts]-unless someone like Mommy or Daddy says it's ok.” While likely well-intentioned, this framing is problematic. It overlooks the heartbreaking reality that some parents are, themselves, perpetrators of abuse. Any prevention guide must take care to avoid reinforcing the idea that all parental authority is inherently safe, because, sadly, that’s not always the case.
Overall, Not My Kid! is a valuable resource for parents and caregivers who want to take proactive steps in protecting children. It may not be exhaustive, but as a conversation-starter and awareness-builder, it absolutely has its place on the parenting shelf. Just read it with a critical mind, and be ready to supplement it with more inclusive discussions.
Thank you to Victory Editing for the advance copy of this book via NetGalley. All opinions, as always, are my own.
The strength of Not My Kid! lies in its straightforward, non-alarmist tone. Sensiba does an excellent job breaking down a complex and emotionally charged issue into manageable steps. From teaching body autonomy to recognising grooming behaviours, the book offers practical strategies that caregivers can start using immediately. It’s brief enough to read in one sitting, but its impact lingers, especially considering the sobering statistics on child sexual abuse.
That said, I was troubled by moments where the language reinforces a blanket assumption that children are always safe with their parents. For example, the author suggests that children should be taught “No one should touch it [their private parts]-unless someone like Mommy or Daddy says it's ok.” While likely well-intentioned, this framing is problematic. It overlooks the heartbreaking reality that some parents are, themselves, perpetrators of abuse. Any prevention guide must take care to avoid reinforcing the idea that all parental authority is inherently safe, because, sadly, that’s not always the case.
Overall, Not My Kid! is a valuable resource for parents and caregivers who want to take proactive steps in protecting children. It may not be exhaustive, but as a conversation-starter and awareness-builder, it absolutely has its place on the parenting shelf. Just read it with a critical mind, and be ready to supplement it with more inclusive discussions.
Thank you to Victory Editing for the advance copy of this book via NetGalley. All opinions, as always, are my own.
May 3, 2025
Thank you, NetGalley, for the ARC. I leave this review voluntarily and happily. Also, thank you publishers for your hard work!
This book is definitely worth spreading around to anyone who will read it. I myself was abused when I was a young teenager. This book definitely makes me feel better. I won't go into details about what happened but I really like how it gives parent tips on how to teach their child it's not their fault and not to say negative things like why didn't you tell me sooner. It's really hard to come out and say that someone close to you has been abusing you. This book is a great thing for not just parents but for others to get their hands on. The more louder we are, the better it's going to be for the children and even adults.
This book, I believe, will help many. It shows tips, exercises, and just simple ways to help a child speak up and what's best to teach a child about certain things. For example, don't nickname your privates. You should teach them the right term or call them privates. It will cause less confusion later when they try to tell an adult what's going on. This book will stick with me as it definitely would have helped me when I was younger.
There are predators everywhere. As much as we hate to admit, it can be family or close friends of ours too. But with simple lessons and teaching a child how to say no things can be stopped and send them running. This book is a milestone, and I'll definitely be showing it to others.
This book is definitely worth spreading around to anyone who will read it. I myself was abused when I was a young teenager. This book definitely makes me feel better. I won't go into details about what happened but I really like how it gives parent tips on how to teach their child it's not their fault and not to say negative things like why didn't you tell me sooner. It's really hard to come out and say that someone close to you has been abusing you. This book is a great thing for not just parents but for others to get their hands on. The more louder we are, the better it's going to be for the children and even adults.
This book, I believe, will help many. It shows tips, exercises, and just simple ways to help a child speak up and what's best to teach a child about certain things. For example, don't nickname your privates. You should teach them the right term or call them privates. It will cause less confusion later when they try to tell an adult what's going on. This book will stick with me as it definitely would have helped me when I was younger.
There are predators everywhere. As much as we hate to admit, it can be family or close friends of ours too. But with simple lessons and teaching a child how to say no things can be stopped and send them running. This book is a milestone, and I'll definitely be showing it to others.
June 23, 2025
This is a truly incredible and useful tool for anyone who wants to keep kids safe from sexual abuse or trauma. I’ve worked in victim advocacy professionally for adults, but as my nieces and nephews get older and I consider having children of my own, I was looking for tools that are specific to protecting children.
A quick and fairly easy read, this books lays out the tools in a concise and digestible manner. It starts off with statistics and data that are a wake up call to parents that all children can be at risk. There are conversations and ‘practice sessions’ for those who want to implement these steps with their children. There is concise language that does not delve into scholarly or psychological and is easy to grasp.
Finally, I’d like to emphasize my two favorite things about this book. The first is that the author does not profit from this and has multiple methods for getting it into the hands of those who need and want it, a selfless and powerful gift to parents, educators, and other adults out there who want to keep the children in their lives safe. Second, this book ends with repeated assurance that if your child does experience sexual assault, blame is never on the parent or the child. Blame ALWAYS lies with the abuser. Please - from a person who wished my parents read something like this when I was child - read it.
Thank you NetGalley for my advanced copy of this book.
A quick and fairly easy read, this books lays out the tools in a concise and digestible manner. It starts off with statistics and data that are a wake up call to parents that all children can be at risk. There are conversations and ‘practice sessions’ for those who want to implement these steps with their children. There is concise language that does not delve into scholarly or psychological and is easy to grasp.
Finally, I’d like to emphasize my two favorite things about this book. The first is that the author does not profit from this and has multiple methods for getting it into the hands of those who need and want it, a selfless and powerful gift to parents, educators, and other adults out there who want to keep the children in their lives safe. Second, this book ends with repeated assurance that if your child does experience sexual assault, blame is never on the parent or the child. Blame ALWAYS lies with the abuser. Please - from a person who wished my parents read something like this when I was child - read it.
Thank you NetGalley for my advanced copy of this book.
July 30, 2025
This is such an important topic, but my words have no value here, I will let the author speak instead. “Survivors carry the pain for life. They experience shame, confusion, fear, self-blame, nightmares, panic attacks, and depression.” This book was written as “as effort to educate, equip, and help parents do everything they can to protect their children”.
I’m an educator and this book hit me HARD. “Every fourth girl. Every sixth boy. Some have already been abused. Others will be.” I will never look at my students the same ever again, and hope I am a safe space for them, always.
In using the tools from this guide, we are “making your child harder to groom, harder to silence, and harder to hurt.”
This was a dark, but necessary read, as an educator, as a woman, as a human being. Child abuse is a major topic that is, unfortunately, still taboo. This guide helps to break the cycle, break the silence, and to help parents to keep their kids safe. And if, god forbids, something terrible happens, this book can help with how to deal with this trauma.
This is well-written. It is a heartbreaking subject, because child abuse is horrible, but this has to be an important part of conversation. You're a parent? Read this. You're an older sibling? Read this. You're an educator? Read this. THIS IS CRUCIAL!
I’m an educator and this book hit me HARD. “Every fourth girl. Every sixth boy. Some have already been abused. Others will be.” I will never look at my students the same ever again, and hope I am a safe space for them, always.
In using the tools from this guide, we are “making your child harder to groom, harder to silence, and harder to hurt.”
This was a dark, but necessary read, as an educator, as a woman, as a human being. Child abuse is a major topic that is, unfortunately, still taboo. This guide helps to break the cycle, break the silence, and to help parents to keep their kids safe. And if, god forbids, something terrible happens, this book can help with how to deal with this trauma.
This is well-written. It is a heartbreaking subject, because child abuse is horrible, but this has to be an important part of conversation. You're a parent? Read this. You're an older sibling? Read this. You're an educator? Read this. THIS IS CRUCIAL!
June 4, 2025
this book is an easy to understand and easy to follow guide on how to prioritize communication in order to prevent childhood sexual abuse. the author absolutely does not talk down to the reader here. rather, the author pulls up a chair beside you, ready to talk, ready to empower.
the instructions in here are simple and effective. the tone is serious but not at all unapproachable. talk to your kids about the topic. secrecy and shame only aid abusers. parents with kids of any age, but especially younger ones, should download this free ebook and take the half an hour out of their day to read it. be brave and talk to your kids about sexual abuse, so that they will feel brave to say “NO” when it matters. this book will tell you how to do this.
my thanks to netgalley and the publisher for the digital review copy.
the instructions in here are simple and effective. the tone is serious but not at all unapproachable. talk to your kids about the topic. secrecy and shame only aid abusers. parents with kids of any age, but especially younger ones, should download this free ebook and take the half an hour out of their day to read it. be brave and talk to your kids about sexual abuse, so that they will feel brave to say “NO” when it matters. this book will tell you how to do this.
my thanks to netgalley and the publisher for the digital review copy.
July 1, 2025
The author wrote this book to help parents/guardians/caregivers protect their children from sexual abusers. There are many helpful tips and language to use for conversations in the text. This is the first book I've read to tackle the subject of child safety like this.
As a survivor, I'm glad to see it. As an educator, there are some things I wish had been written differently. This is nitpicky, but no one pees from a vagina; if a book encourages caregivers to use anatomically correct names for body parts, it should edit that part to be accurate.
I encourage anyone who cares about body safety to pick this up as a starting point, then take a training at your local child advocacy center. This is a good start to information that you need to know.
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an ARC. All opinions are my own.
As a survivor, I'm glad to see it. As an educator, there are some things I wish had been written differently. This is nitpicky, but no one pees from a vagina; if a book encourages caregivers to use anatomically correct names for body parts, it should edit that part to be accurate.
I encourage anyone who cares about body safety to pick this up as a starting point, then take a training at your local child advocacy center. This is a good start to information that you need to know.
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an ARC. All opinions are my own.
April 21, 2025
This is a very important book on a topic that is not talked about enough: child sexual abuse. The statistics are terrifying and knowing how to protect and empower your child, especially in the digital world we live in now, is of the utmost importance. Highly recommend for every parent to read this to help bring more awareness to the subject and to provide every parent with the information and tools to speak with your children and give them the knowledge about what is right/wrong and how to protect themselves. The information is so important that the author has made the e-book free and available for all. Thank you ti the author, publisher, and NetGalley for the ARC in return for my honest review.
May 17, 2025
Thoughts:
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily. This is an essential read from a former psychotherapist who has extensive experience with child sexual abuse in many forms. Ashman is able to highlight the importance of talking about this with children young in order to protect them and is able to give many examples and exercises to help parents start putting it in to practice.
Favourite Quote:
“There are good people in this world. Good families. Good men and women
But we have to stop pretending that child sexual abuse is rare.
It's not. And it's not always violent or obvious. It's subtle.
It's hidden in routines. In relationships. In plain sight And until we name it, we can't fight it.”
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily. This is an essential read from a former psychotherapist who has extensive experience with child sexual abuse in many forms. Ashman is able to highlight the importance of talking about this with children young in order to protect them and is able to give many examples and exercises to help parents start putting it in to practice.
Favourite Quote:
“There are good people in this world. Good families. Good men and women
But we have to stop pretending that child sexual abuse is rare.
It's not. And it's not always violent or obvious. It's subtle.
It's hidden in routines. In relationships. In plain sight And until we name it, we can't fight it.”
May 19, 2025
Thank you to Victory Editing NetGalley Co-op, the author and NetGalley for providing a digital ARC copy in exchange for an honest review
The author has made this ebook available for free
As my Son is now a fully grown man and has mercifully never been subjected to any sexual abuse, I obviously can't implement any of the suggestions in this book. However I can appreciate how invaluable and empowering the information would be for parents of young children. If you are reading these reviews and have any concerns regarding a member of your own family or someone close to your child, then I recommend you act now and read this book. It could be the best decision you ever made.
#NotMyKid #NetGalley #SexualAbuse
The author has made this ebook available for free
As my Son is now a fully grown man and has mercifully never been subjected to any sexual abuse, I obviously can't implement any of the suggestions in this book. However I can appreciate how invaluable and empowering the information would be for parents of young children. If you are reading these reviews and have any concerns regarding a member of your own family or someone close to your child, then I recommend you act now and read this book. It could be the best decision you ever made.
#NotMyKid #NetGalley #SexualAbuse
June 10, 2025
What an incredible and important read for any parent or caregiver wanting to protect children from potential predators. Thinking about this happening to my own kids makes me sick to my stomach but it makes the topic all the more important. The author draws from her background and offers straightforward advice and practical tips to help navigate this sensitive subject. This type of approach makes it really easy to understand and apply.
This is a must-have resource for anyone serious about child safety and I'm definitely recommending it to all my parent friends.
This is a must-have resource for anyone serious about child safety and I'm definitely recommending it to all my parent friends.
June 3, 2025
This is an essential educational book for parents on how to protect children from predators.
It is very short, easy to read and to the point, listing knowledge to share and conversations you should have with your children, no matter the age.
The statistics are horrifying and knowledge is key.
A very important book.
It is very short, easy to read and to the point, listing knowledge to share and conversations you should have with your children, no matter the age.
The statistics are horrifying and knowledge is key.
A very important book.
June 8, 2025
I’m writing this review so more parents know this book exists. It’s a short, easy read and I finished it in less than an hour. It is a great resource for parents to help their child(ren) not become victims of sexual abuse. It has tips, guides, exercises, and checklists that you can use to navigate a tough but important subject matter with your kid(s). A must read, in my opinion.
June 17, 2025
This was such an informative book and the layout of it made it easy to read, as well as the choice of writing it in a less clinical/textbook sense. I appreciate that so much as it would give more people a chance to take in the information and use it properly. Amazing job.
Thank you NetGalley for an eARC in return for an honest review.
Thank you NetGalley for an eARC in return for an honest review.
May 18, 2025
“I won’t gamble with my children’s safety for the sake of fitting in or sparing someone’s feelings.” 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 this is a very important book! every parent should read this!
August 19, 2025
Li uma cópia avançada através da NetGalley. Aborda um tema difícil — como proteger as crianças de abuso sexual —, mas fá-lo com muita clareza, compaixão, e a convicção, que também subscrevo, que a prevenção começa com a educação. Como mãe, achei este guia acessível e relevante: é um óptimo ponto de partida para conversarmos com os nossos filhos sobre autonomia do corpo e como reconhecer comportamentos predatórios. Dito isto, fiquei incomodada com os momentos em que a linguagem reforça uma suposição geral de que as crianças estão sempre seguras com os pais. Por exemplo, a autora sugere que se ensine às crianças que “ninguém deve tocar-lhes [nas partes íntimas], a não ser que alguém como a mamã ou o papá diga que está tudo bem”. Embora provavelmente bem-intencionado, este enquadramento é problemático. Ignora a realidade desoladora de que alguns pais são, eles próprios, autores de abusos. Qualquer guia de prevenção deve ter o cuidado de evitar reforçar a ideia de que toda a autoridade parental é inerentemente segura, porque, infelizmente, nem sempre é esse o caso.
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Not My Kid! tackles one of the most urgent and under-discussed topics in parenting: how to protect children from sexual abuse. Denise Sensiba approaches this difficult subject with clarity, compassion, and a firm belief that prevention starts with education. As a parent, I found the book both accessible and essential—a much-needed starter guide for those unsure where or how to begin this conversation with their children.
The strength of Not My Kid! lies in its straightforward, non-alarmist tone. Sensiba does an excellent job breaking down a complex and emotionally charged issue into manageable steps. From teaching body autonomy to recognising grooming behaviours, the book offers practical strategies that caregivers can start using immediately. It’s brief enough to read in one sitting, but its impact lingers, especially considering the sobering statistics on child sexual abuse.
That said, I was troubled by moments where the language reinforces a blanket assumption that children are always safe with their parents. For example, the author suggests that children should be taught “No one should touch it [their private parts]-unless someone like Mommy or Daddy says it's ok.” While likely well-intentioned, this framing is problematic. It overlooks the heartbreaking reality that some parents are, themselves, perpetrators of abuse. Any prevention guide must take care to avoid reinforcing the idea that all parental authority is inherently safe, because, sadly, that’s not always the case.
Overall, Not My Kid! is a valuable resource for parents and caregivers who want to take proactive steps in protecting children. It may not be exhaustive, but as a conversation-starter and awareness-builder, it absolutely has its place on the parenting shelf. Just read it with a critical mind and be ready to supplement it with more inclusive discussions.
---
Not My Kid! tackles one of the most urgent and under-discussed topics in parenting: how to protect children from sexual abuse. Denise Sensiba approaches this difficult subject with clarity, compassion, and a firm belief that prevention starts with education. As a parent, I found the book both accessible and essential—a much-needed starter guide for those unsure where or how to begin this conversation with their children.
The strength of Not My Kid! lies in its straightforward, non-alarmist tone. Sensiba does an excellent job breaking down a complex and emotionally charged issue into manageable steps. From teaching body autonomy to recognising grooming behaviours, the book offers practical strategies that caregivers can start using immediately. It’s brief enough to read in one sitting, but its impact lingers, especially considering the sobering statistics on child sexual abuse.
That said, I was troubled by moments where the language reinforces a blanket assumption that children are always safe with their parents. For example, the author suggests that children should be taught “No one should touch it [their private parts]-unless someone like Mommy or Daddy says it's ok.” While likely well-intentioned, this framing is problematic. It overlooks the heartbreaking reality that some parents are, themselves, perpetrators of abuse. Any prevention guide must take care to avoid reinforcing the idea that all parental authority is inherently safe, because, sadly, that’s not always the case.
Overall, Not My Kid! is a valuable resource for parents and caregivers who want to take proactive steps in protecting children. It may not be exhaustive, but as a conversation-starter and awareness-builder, it absolutely has its place on the parenting shelf. Just read it with a critical mind and be ready to supplement it with more inclusive discussions.
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