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When I Kill You
Who is watching Nell Masters?
Nell Masters is certain someone is following her. The hairs on the back of her neck rise when she travels to and from work, there are silent calls to her office, and a huge bouquet of flowers arrives without a card. And Nell has a reason to be looking over her shoulder, because she has a secret that she’s hiding from everyone in her life, including her new partner, Alex. But Alex also has secrets of his own.
Fourteen years earlier, when Nell went by the name Elle Nugent, she witnessed a student, Bryony Sanders, getting into a stranger’s car. When Bryony was found murdered, Elle became obsessed with finding the person responsible. She was convinced she knew who it was and her fixation with Brett Parker, the man she accused, led her down a dangerous path . . .
Now, Nell tries to convince herself that this unnerving feeling of being watched is all in her mind. Has someone from her past discovered her new identity? Has the stalker become the stalked? Or is there something even more deadly at play?
Nell Masters is certain someone is following her. The hairs on the back of her neck rise when she travels to and from work, there are silent calls to her office, and a huge bouquet of flowers arrives without a card. And Nell has a reason to be looking over her shoulder, because she has a secret that she’s hiding from everyone in her life, including her new partner, Alex. But Alex also has secrets of his own.
Fourteen years earlier, when Nell went by the name Elle Nugent, she witnessed a student, Bryony Sanders, getting into a stranger’s car. When Bryony was found murdered, Elle became obsessed with finding the person responsible. She was convinced she knew who it was and her fixation with Brett Parker, the man she accused, led her down a dangerous path . . .
Now, Nell tries to convince herself that this unnerving feeling of being watched is all in her mind. Has someone from her past discovered her new identity? Has the stalker become the stalked? Or is there something even more deadly at play?
304 pages, Hardcover
First published February 17, 2026
1027 people are currently reading
45274 people want to read
About the author
B.A. Paris
24 books23.9k followersB.A. Paris is the New York Times and Sunday Times bestselling author of eight novels including the word-of-mouth hit, Behind Closed Doors, and her latest psychological thriller, When I Kill You.
Over nine million editions of her work have been sold worldwide and her books have been translated into 41 languages. Her novel, The Breakdown, has been adapted for film under the title Blackwater Lane.
Before becoming an author, B.A. Paris, who spent most of her adult life living in France, worked in finance as a trader before retraining as an English teacher. Today, she writes from her cottage in Hampshire, England.
Sign up to her newsletter at www.baparis.com or follow her on social media @baparisauthor
Over nine million editions of her work have been sold worldwide and her books have been translated into 41 languages. Her novel, The Breakdown, has been adapted for film under the title Blackwater Lane.
Before becoming an author, B.A. Paris, who spent most of her adult life living in France, worked in finance as a trader before retraining as an English teacher. Today, she writes from her cottage in Hampshire, England.
Sign up to her newsletter at www.baparis.com or follow her on social media @baparisauthor
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 1,754 reviews
February 22, 2026
You know how some books are so deliciously addictive that you save them for your most sacred late-night reading sessions — the ones that deserve your best snacks and your comfiest couch? My snack lineup has evolved, by the way: farewell, caramel popcorn (too many cavities), and hello to garden Sun Chips — the red ones, obviously. As for the drink of choice, your favorite red, — for women, it’s a bold Cabernet Sauvignon; for men, well, it should probably be Emma Stone or Kylie with red wings. (All right, bad joke alert.)
You curl up, snacks in hand, heart open, and start your private reading tournament. This was one of those books — the kind that makes your pulse race, your stomach twist, and your nerves spark like you’ve just downed five matcha lattes (extra matcha, minimal milk). It’s unsettling in the best way, like a psychological slap that you weirdly enjoy. Okay, maybe that sounds a little masochistic, but let’s call it “thriller appreciation.”
The first part of the book completely blew my mind. I was so ready to give it five stars after nearly teetering on the edge of a panic attack (in the best reading sense possible). The past timeline — Elle’s story — was gripping, layered, and absolutely brilliant. Meanwhile, the creepy stalker notes in the present timeline added a perfect mix of irritation and dark humor. Each note ending with “when I kill you” hit just the right eerie, sarcastic tone.
But — and here comes my reader heartbreak — once the story left Elle’s past and stayed solely in the present with Nell’s increasingly confused, agitated mind, the pacing slowed. The tension loosened. The repetitive cycle dragged a bit. The suspect list felt a little too thin, and I actually guessed the big twist early on. When the revelation finally came, it felt slightly rushed — more “hmm, okay” than “oh my god!” I wished there had been more build-up and misdirection to deepen the shock value. (I can’t say more without spoiling it, but trust me, when you finish, you’ll get what I mean.)
Still, I rounded my 3.5 stars up to 5, because I remain a loyal admirer of B. A. Paris’s wonderfully twisted imagination. I just wish the sheer perfection of the first half had carried through the second. That said, the concept of a stalker becoming the prey of another stalker? Chef’s kiss. It made me imagine Joe Goldberg himself squirming under someone else’s watchful, vicious gaze. Brilliant idea — and Paris executed it beautifully for the most part.
Quick recap of the plot:
Nell Masters works at Drop In, a charity center. In her mid-thirties, she lives quietly in the cozy apartment she inherited from her great-aunt. Her circle is small, her world steady — until it isn’t. She’s dating Alex, a transatlantic man whose time is split between the U.S. and England, and she’s desperately trying to keep her dark past buried. Because Nell wasn’t always Nell — she used to be Elle, and one tragic attempt to play armchair detective left her drowning in guilt and convinced she doesn’t deserve happiness.
Now, she senses she’s being watched. There’s a stalker — one she can’t prove exists — and as her boyfriend’s secrets start to surface, she realizes her danger might not stem from her past at all. Maybe the real threat lies in the present, among the people she’s recently let into her life. The question is: can she escape this time, or has she finally been cornered for good?
An absolutely heart-throbbing, popcorn-worthy read (go for the white cheddar — trust me, your dentist will thank you). Highly recommended for thriller lovers and devoted B. A. Paris fans alike!
A huge thank-you to NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press for providing me with this deliciously twisted thriller in exchange for my honest review.
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You curl up, snacks in hand, heart open, and start your private reading tournament. This was one of those books — the kind that makes your pulse race, your stomach twist, and your nerves spark like you’ve just downed five matcha lattes (extra matcha, minimal milk). It’s unsettling in the best way, like a psychological slap that you weirdly enjoy. Okay, maybe that sounds a little masochistic, but let’s call it “thriller appreciation.”
The first part of the book completely blew my mind. I was so ready to give it five stars after nearly teetering on the edge of a panic attack (in the best reading sense possible). The past timeline — Elle’s story — was gripping, layered, and absolutely brilliant. Meanwhile, the creepy stalker notes in the present timeline added a perfect mix of irritation and dark humor. Each note ending with “when I kill you” hit just the right eerie, sarcastic tone.
But — and here comes my reader heartbreak — once the story left Elle’s past and stayed solely in the present with Nell’s increasingly confused, agitated mind, the pacing slowed. The tension loosened. The repetitive cycle dragged a bit. The suspect list felt a little too thin, and I actually guessed the big twist early on. When the revelation finally came, it felt slightly rushed — more “hmm, okay” than “oh my god!” I wished there had been more build-up and misdirection to deepen the shock value. (I can’t say more without spoiling it, but trust me, when you finish, you’ll get what I mean.)
Still, I rounded my 3.5 stars up to 5, because I remain a loyal admirer of B. A. Paris’s wonderfully twisted imagination. I just wish the sheer perfection of the first half had carried through the second. That said, the concept of a stalker becoming the prey of another stalker? Chef’s kiss. It made me imagine Joe Goldberg himself squirming under someone else’s watchful, vicious gaze. Brilliant idea — and Paris executed it beautifully for the most part.
Quick recap of the plot:
Nell Masters works at Drop In, a charity center. In her mid-thirties, she lives quietly in the cozy apartment she inherited from her great-aunt. Her circle is small, her world steady — until it isn’t. She’s dating Alex, a transatlantic man whose time is split between the U.S. and England, and she’s desperately trying to keep her dark past buried. Because Nell wasn’t always Nell — she used to be Elle, and one tragic attempt to play armchair detective left her drowning in guilt and convinced she doesn’t deserve happiness.
Now, she senses she’s being watched. There’s a stalker — one she can’t prove exists — and as her boyfriend’s secrets start to surface, she realizes her danger might not stem from her past at all. Maybe the real threat lies in the present, among the people she’s recently let into her life. The question is: can she escape this time, or has she finally been cornered for good?
An absolutely heart-throbbing, popcorn-worthy read (go for the white cheddar — trust me, your dentist will thank you). Highly recommended for thriller lovers and devoted B. A. Paris fans alike!
A huge thank-you to NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press for providing me with this deliciously twisted thriller in exchange for my honest review.
Follow me on medium.com to read my articles about books, movies, streaming series, astrology:
medium blog
November 19, 2025
Fourteen years ago, Elle witnessed an abduction and murder.
As the years went by, she became obsessed with the man she suspected. So much so it destroyed her life and others!
She has since reinvented herself as Nell, and unfortunately, her past is now catching up with her.
Can she truly escape her past or is it time to pay the price? Nell made for a perfect main character.🙌 Just unbalanced enough that you weren’t sure to root for her or against.
In true B.A. Paris fashion, I was kept guessing right up to the very end! Was it a bit OTT? Yes! But most psychological thrillers are…that’s what we love about them.😂
A fast read I devoured in just a couple sittings. This will make a perfect weekend read!
✍️ B.A. Paris
📑 304 pages
🗓️ February 17 2026
📈 4/5🌟
👉 Thriller
Thank you to NetGalley and St Martin’s Press
As the years went by, she became obsessed with the man she suspected. So much so it destroyed her life and others!
She has since reinvented herself as Nell, and unfortunately, her past is now catching up with her.
Can she truly escape her past or is it time to pay the price? Nell made for a perfect main character.🙌 Just unbalanced enough that you weren’t sure to root for her or against.
In true B.A. Paris fashion, I was kept guessing right up to the very end! Was it a bit OTT? Yes! But most psychological thrillers are…that’s what we love about them.😂
A fast read I devoured in just a couple sittings. This will make a perfect weekend read!
✍️ B.A. Paris
📑 304 pages
🗓️ February 17 2026
📈 4/5🌟
👉 Thriller
Thank you to NetGalley and St Martin’s Press
November 1, 2025
Here I am waving from outlier alley! I was highly anticipating reading When I Kill You but unfortunately it failed to wow me. I was; however, intrigued by the fact that Nell Masters felt as if she was being watched. She didn't just feel as if she was being watched, she knows it. As strange deliveries begin to arrive with no notes, her anxiety kicks into high gear. Nell has a secret, one that no one, including her boyfriend, Alex knows about. But Alex has his own secrets.
Fourteen years earlier, Nell went by another name and was a key witness who saw a young woman get into a stranger's car. Later the young woman was found murdered. She became obsessed with the case and tracking down the killer. I don't know about you, but if I think someone killed someone, I am not going to be breathing down their back anytime soon!
This book is told in dual timelines and moved at quite a slow pace. If you follow my reviews, you know that I am not a fan of slow burns. I wanted this to hurry up and get on with it multiple times while reading. I went from being intrigued to bored, then intrigued again. This book does touch on obsession, trauma, and secrets. I thought that the author portrayed those very well in this book. I also thought the author did a great job of showing Nell's unease and increasing anxiety as she dealt with being watched.
Others have enjoyed this book more than I did so please read their reviews as well.
*This was a witches words buddy read with Brenda ~The Sisters~Book Witch. Please read her review as well to get her thoughts on When I Kill You.
Thank you to St. Martin's Press and NetGalley who provided me with a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All the thoughts and opinions are my own.
Read more of my reviews at www.openbookposts.com 📖
Fourteen years earlier, Nell went by another name and was a key witness who saw a young woman get into a stranger's car. Later the young woman was found murdered. She became obsessed with the case and tracking down the killer. I don't know about you, but if I think someone killed someone, I am not going to be breathing down their back anytime soon!
This book is told in dual timelines and moved at quite a slow pace. If you follow my reviews, you know that I am not a fan of slow burns. I wanted this to hurry up and get on with it multiple times while reading. I went from being intrigued to bored, then intrigued again. This book does touch on obsession, trauma, and secrets. I thought that the author portrayed those very well in this book. I also thought the author did a great job of showing Nell's unease and increasing anxiety as she dealt with being watched.
Others have enjoyed this book more than I did so please read their reviews as well.
*This was a witches words buddy read with Brenda ~The Sisters~Book Witch. Please read her review as well to get her thoughts on When I Kill You.
Thank you to St. Martin's Press and NetGalley who provided me with a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All the thoughts and opinions are my own.
Read more of my reviews at www.openbookposts.com 📖
November 28, 2025
Finally- a book that kept me on my toes! I was so excited to read an early copy of this book, and it definitely delivered! I was entertained from the first page to the last, and I never once figured out who was stalking our main character, Nell. This story had me guessing and questioning every single character until the very end. 🕵🏻
This story goes back and forth between Present and Past Chapters. In the Present chapters, we have Nell Masters (who was once Elle Nugent). In the Past chapters, they focus on Elle Nugent (before she became Nell Masters). Trust me, it’s not that confusing. We also get little extracts from the stalkers notebook throughout this story, which I really enjoyed reading.
Fourteen years ago, when Nell was Elle, she witnessed a young girl get into a black car with a stranger- a man who Elle thought she recognized. The young girl, Bryony Sanders, was later found murdered. Elle then became fixated on the case, and began following the stranger she thought was responsible for Bryony’s death.
Fast forward fourteen years later, and Elle is living a new life as Nell Masters. Nell lives a fairly quiet life, has a good job, has just made some new friends, and has a boyfriend who is becoming pretty serious. However, Nell feels that she has been followed and watched for weeks, evens months. Why can’t she shake this feeling? Is someone out to get her? Is her past catching up with her? Or is someone in her present life playing tricks on her?
You will have to read this page-turner to find out! For me, this was another hit from B.A. Paris, and I’m so glad that I had the chance to read it. I definitely recommend adding this to your list.
Many thanks to NetGalley, St. Martin’s Press, and the author for an ARC of this book, in which I had the pleasure of reading for an honest review.
Publication date: February 17, 2026
This story goes back and forth between Present and Past Chapters. In the Present chapters, we have Nell Masters (who was once Elle Nugent). In the Past chapters, they focus on Elle Nugent (before she became Nell Masters). Trust me, it’s not that confusing. We also get little extracts from the stalkers notebook throughout this story, which I really enjoyed reading.
Fourteen years ago, when Nell was Elle, she witnessed a young girl get into a black car with a stranger- a man who Elle thought she recognized. The young girl, Bryony Sanders, was later found murdered. Elle then became fixated on the case, and began following the stranger she thought was responsible for Bryony’s death.
Fast forward fourteen years later, and Elle is living a new life as Nell Masters. Nell lives a fairly quiet life, has a good job, has just made some new friends, and has a boyfriend who is becoming pretty serious. However, Nell feels that she has been followed and watched for weeks, evens months. Why can’t she shake this feeling? Is someone out to get her? Is her past catching up with her? Or is someone in her present life playing tricks on her?
You will have to read this page-turner to find out! For me, this was another hit from B.A. Paris, and I’m so glad that I had the chance to read it. I definitely recommend adding this to your list.
Many thanks to NetGalley, St. Martin’s Press, and the author for an ARC of this book, in which I had the pleasure of reading for an honest review.
Publication date: February 17, 2026
February 25, 2026
Well, I’ve got to say that after finishing When I Kill You in one single evening, I’m happy to announce that the unstoppable B.A. Paris has once again demonstrated why she’s the queen of suspense. Easily rivaling Behind Closed Doors in terms of the perfectly masterminded nightmarish terrors and psychological thrills, Paris’s newest book was a taut rollercoaster ride of spine-tingling fears that I couldn’t put down. You see, between the slowly ratcheting unease and the crazy stalker vibes, it made me feel like I still needed to look over my shoulder even after checking that I’d locked all of my windows and doors. Thanks to a deliciously unhinged female main character and oodles of believable suspects, I never knew what was coming around the next blind turn. After all, the two parts of the book set me up for the nail-biting climax and last-minute revelation in the best possible way.
So what exactly kept me guessing throughout this one-sitting read? Well, between the dual POVs—one of whom was the creepy unnamed villain—and the dual timelines of the past and the present, the truth was hidden in a way that only a master can pull off. Yup. You got it. I didn’t see the big, giant twist coming at all. Turning everything on its head, this finale had everything I love: well-disguised surprises, hair-raising scenes, and even a touch of a few thought-provoking themes. You see, through the exploration of obsession, guilt, and love, it managed to chill me to the bone. I mean, when a former stalker starts fearing that they’re now being followed themselves, I knew that I couldn’t trust a single character—including the narrator. So if you are a fan of twisty plotting, long-buried secrets, or hinted-at dark histories, grab this book now. It was a blast. Rating of 4.75 stars (upgraded).
BRIEF BLURB:
Please oh please go onto this one at least mostly blind! With even the publisher-provided synopsis giving just a bit too much away, all you need to know is the following… After changing her name and disappearing overnight fourteen years ago, Nell Masters is starting to fear that her past has come back to haunt her. After all, she’s becoming more and more convinced that someone is following her every move. With strange phone calls, anonymous flower deliveries, and the sense that there are eyes on her as she goes about her day, Nell dreads that someone has discovered who she really is. Is she being stalked? Or is something far more sinister going on beneath the surface that could ultimately lead to her death? Not knowing what to believe, Nell starts to question everything and everyone in her life. After all, she’s lived under the radar for long enough to know that her world blowing up could be just the start of the end…
Thank you B.A. Paris and St. Martin’s Press for my complimentary copy. All opinions are my own.
PUB DATE: February 17, 2026
Content warning: stalking, pedestrian vs car accident, home invasion, knife violence, mention of: death, murder
So what exactly kept me guessing throughout this one-sitting read? Well, between the dual POVs—one of whom was the creepy unnamed villain—and the dual timelines of the past and the present, the truth was hidden in a way that only a master can pull off. Yup. You got it. I didn’t see the big, giant twist coming at all. Turning everything on its head, this finale had everything I love: well-disguised surprises, hair-raising scenes, and even a touch of a few thought-provoking themes. You see, through the exploration of obsession, guilt, and love, it managed to chill me to the bone. I mean, when a former stalker starts fearing that they’re now being followed themselves, I knew that I couldn’t trust a single character—including the narrator. So if you are a fan of twisty plotting, long-buried secrets, or hinted-at dark histories, grab this book now. It was a blast. Rating of 4.75 stars (upgraded).
BRIEF BLURB:
Please oh please go onto this one at least mostly blind! With even the publisher-provided synopsis giving just a bit too much away, all you need to know is the following… After changing her name and disappearing overnight fourteen years ago, Nell Masters is starting to fear that her past has come back to haunt her. After all, she’s becoming more and more convinced that someone is following her every move. With strange phone calls, anonymous flower deliveries, and the sense that there are eyes on her as she goes about her day, Nell dreads that someone has discovered who she really is. Is she being stalked? Or is something far more sinister going on beneath the surface that could ultimately lead to her death? Not knowing what to believe, Nell starts to question everything and everyone in her life. After all, she’s lived under the radar for long enough to know that her world blowing up could be just the start of the end…
Thank you B.A. Paris and St. Martin’s Press for my complimentary copy. All opinions are my own.
PUB DATE: February 17, 2026
Content warning: stalking, pedestrian vs car accident, home invasion, knife violence, mention of: death, murder
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
⭐️ 3.5 ⭐️ BA Paris is so good at building suspense and anxiety in both the character and the audience, you’ll be flipping pages without a care about time. I’ve read a few of her books and I’m a fan of her work. They are fast, short, enjoyable, popcorn like. Despite the twists that are generally somewhat predictable, her books stand out in their own way from other writers of this genre.
BA Paris gets really crafty with her characters but what really makes her books great is how unsettling they are. In ‘When I Kill You’, the paranoia exhibited by Nell’s character has cranked up the suspense and tension, keeping the mystery razor sharp. Nell Masters believed she was constantly being watched. She’s anxious, she’s cautious, she’s afraid. Fourteen years prior she witnessed a murder of a young woman that left her obsessing over the killer. The suspected man that she claimed was the real killer wasn’t convicted and that drove her over the edge to the point where she began hounding on the man and his family. That hounding came with a serious injury that left her in a rush to change her identity. The paranoia created in the now and then timelines brought on a very anxiety-induced reading experience that gave me palpitations!
All the fun and thrilling moments aside, the problem with this book in my opinion was the ending. It did not live up to the momentum. The author sets up a cat and mouse chase, a whodunit mystery that falls flat with the reveal. The reveal was both a surprise and a let down. I truly thought that there would be a connection between the converging storylines but the connection never comes to fruition, instead the killer is completely unexpected & doesn’t fit the story. So much obsession, stalking, so much suspense for an underwhelming ending.
Many thanks to NetGalley, St. Martins Press and the author, B.A. Paris for sending me this early ARC.
Publication date: February 17, 2026
BA Paris gets really crafty with her characters but what really makes her books great is how unsettling they are. In ‘When I Kill You’, the paranoia exhibited by Nell’s character has cranked up the suspense and tension, keeping the mystery razor sharp. Nell Masters believed she was constantly being watched. She’s anxious, she’s cautious, she’s afraid. Fourteen years prior she witnessed a murder of a young woman that left her obsessing over the killer. The suspected man that she claimed was the real killer wasn’t convicted and that drove her over the edge to the point where she began hounding on the man and his family. That hounding came with a serious injury that left her in a rush to change her identity. The paranoia created in the now and then timelines brought on a very anxiety-induced reading experience that gave me palpitations!
All the fun and thrilling moments aside, the problem with this book in my opinion was the ending. It did not live up to the momentum. The author sets up a cat and mouse chase, a whodunit mystery that falls flat with the reveal. The reveal was both a surprise and a let down. I truly thought that there would be a connection between the converging storylines but the connection never comes to fruition, instead the killer is completely unexpected & doesn’t fit the story. So much obsession, stalking, so much suspense for an underwhelming ending.
Many thanks to NetGalley, St. Martins Press and the author, B.A. Paris for sending me this early ARC.
Publication date: February 17, 2026
November 5, 2025
Confession:
I think I might be leaving my thriller era. The spark isn’t gone, but the excitement just doesn’t hit like it used to. Maybe I’ve read too many twists or maybe this one just didn’t thrill the way it promised to.
What Lit My Mood
Fourteen years ago, Nell went by another name and saw something that changed everything for her. She witnessed Bryony Sanders, stepping into a stranger’s car. When Bryony turns up dead, Nell becomes obsessed with finding justice, transforming herself into a stalker watching the killer’s every move.
Now, years later, someone’s watching her.
I loved the unique twist on the stalker trope, turning the hunter into the hunted.
I loved the way the stalker chapters ended. Clever and did have me wanting to read another chapter.
Where My Mood Flickered
The story moves between two timelines: Nell stalking in the past and Nell being stalked in the present. The concept is great, but the threads didn't weave together tightly enough.
The big reveal of the current stalker was shocking, but also a bit of a letdown once it landed. And the pacing… painfully slow. A stalker story should have had me peeking through the blinds, not checking the clock.
Witchy Mood Meter
Mood Mismatch — The idea was sharp, but the suspense lost its edge before the spell could really take hold.
Verdict
Banish it to the caldron: Loved the concept, but the delivery didn’t haunt me the way it should have.
A Witches Words buddy read with Debra who might of shared in my pain. Check out her review to find out.
I received a copy from the publisher through NetGalley
I think I might be leaving my thriller era. The spark isn’t gone, but the excitement just doesn’t hit like it used to. Maybe I’ve read too many twists or maybe this one just didn’t thrill the way it promised to.
What Lit My Mood
Fourteen years ago, Nell went by another name and saw something that changed everything for her. She witnessed Bryony Sanders, stepping into a stranger’s car. When Bryony turns up dead, Nell becomes obsessed with finding justice, transforming herself into a stalker watching the killer’s every move.
Now, years later, someone’s watching her.
I loved the unique twist on the stalker trope, turning the hunter into the hunted.
I loved the way the stalker chapters ended. Clever and did have me wanting to read another chapter.
Where My Mood Flickered
The story moves between two timelines: Nell stalking in the past and Nell being stalked in the present. The concept is great, but the threads didn't weave together tightly enough.
The big reveal of the current stalker was shocking, but also a bit of a letdown once it landed. And the pacing… painfully slow. A stalker story should have had me peeking through the blinds, not checking the clock.
Witchy Mood Meter
Mood Mismatch — The idea was sharp, but the suspense lost its edge before the spell could really take hold.
Verdict
Banish it to the caldron: Loved the concept, but the delivery didn’t haunt me the way it should have.
A Witches Words buddy read with Debra who might of shared in my pain. Check out her review to find out.
I received a copy from the publisher through NetGalley
January 21, 2026
As a massive B.A. Paris fan, I will forever await each new release patiently but with baited breath, hoping to be wildly entertained and perhaps a bit on edge as well. And her upcoming release, WHEN I K!LL YOU, did not disappoint.
From the go, I was pulled into the eerie psychological mystery filled to the brim with a low-level hum of gritty, dark atmosphere so intense and descriptive I felt as though I was there myself. Unsure who was “good”, who was “bad”, or even what exactly was happening in the past or present, I loved the trust no one vibes the story maintains through most of it as well as the usage of the butterfly effect— a plot device I have come to realize I absolutely love.
The pacing of the story felt very even and never dragged or seemed stuck, which I appreciated. There is a terrific bingeable quality to it, making it great for a quick rainy day or weekend read. I found that I didn’t connect to the characters, particularly our MC, on the same level as I have with her other books, but I do not think that lessened my overall enjoyment of the book. And I would definitely recommend it to others, especially those who love a slower burn, atmospheric build-up.
🎧 The audiobook really helped up the things that go bump in the night quality, which I ended up loving. However, there is a pattern of alternating chapters between our MC and another character whose passages end with the same exact line every time. While I do understand the reason for its inclusion, it became grating after a while, and I think the audio ended up enhancing that fact.
Read if you like:
▪️psychological thrillers
▪️domestic suspense
▪️atmospheric writing
▪️stalker element
▪️butterfly effect
▪️dual timeline and POV
A huge thank you to St. Martin’s Press and Macmillan Audio for the advanced copies.
Publishes: February 17, 2026
CURRENT RANKING:
🚪Behind Closed Doors
🪟 The Breakdown
✈️ The Dilemma
🛋️ The Therapist
🔪 When I K!ll You
🚗 Bring Me Back
🗝️ The Guest
🦟 The Mosquito
🙍🏼♀️ The Prisoner
From the go, I was pulled into the eerie psychological mystery filled to the brim with a low-level hum of gritty, dark atmosphere so intense and descriptive I felt as though I was there myself. Unsure who was “good”, who was “bad”, or even what exactly was happening in the past or present, I loved the trust no one vibes the story maintains through most of it as well as the usage of the butterfly effect— a plot device I have come to realize I absolutely love.
The pacing of the story felt very even and never dragged or seemed stuck, which I appreciated. There is a terrific bingeable quality to it, making it great for a quick rainy day or weekend read. I found that I didn’t connect to the characters, particularly our MC, on the same level as I have with her other books, but I do not think that lessened my overall enjoyment of the book. And I would definitely recommend it to others, especially those who love a slower burn, atmospheric build-up.
🎧 The audiobook really helped up the things that go bump in the night quality, which I ended up loving. However, there is a pattern of alternating chapters between our MC and another character whose passages end with the same exact line every time. While I do understand the reason for its inclusion, it became grating after a while, and I think the audio ended up enhancing that fact.
Read if you like:
▪️psychological thrillers
▪️domestic suspense
▪️atmospheric writing
▪️stalker element
▪️butterfly effect
▪️dual timeline and POV
A huge thank you to St. Martin’s Press and Macmillan Audio for the advanced copies.
Publishes: February 17, 2026
CURRENT RANKING:
🚪Behind Closed Doors
🪟 The Breakdown
✈️ The Dilemma
🛋️ The Therapist
🔪 When I K!ll You
🚗 Bring Me Back
🗝️ The Guest
🦟 The Mosquito
🙍🏼♀️ The Prisoner
December 18, 2025
Elle thinks she sees an abduction outside her window, and the young woman is later found dead. Elle thinks she can identify the man and her obsession ruins her life.
Fourteen years later, Elle is now living under the name Nell. Strange things begin happening and she’s certain someone is stalking her. She has secrets she wants kept hidden, as does her partner Alex.
Is Elle/Nell the stalker or the one being stalked?
Told in dual timelines, the story is a slow burn. I usually enjoy slow burns but this one is the opposite of thrilling.
There’s also a mystery narrator who ends their chapters with “when I Kill You.” It grew tiring.
In the end, I found the story’s ending convoluted and I lost interest long before the ending.
* I received a digital review copy via Netgalley. The narrator was great.
Fourteen years later, Elle is now living under the name Nell. Strange things begin happening and she’s certain someone is stalking her. She has secrets she wants kept hidden, as does her partner Alex.
Is Elle/Nell the stalker or the one being stalked?
Told in dual timelines, the story is a slow burn. I usually enjoy slow burns but this one is the opposite of thrilling.
There’s also a mystery narrator who ends their chapters with “when I Kill You.” It grew tiring.
In the end, I found the story’s ending convoluted and I lost interest long before the ending.
* I received a digital review copy via Netgalley. The narrator was great.
February 18, 2026
"Who is watching Nell Masters?" Or maybe someone knows she is not really Nell.
14 years ago Elle witnessed a young woman make a terrible choice getting into the wrong car and ended up dead. She felt like she knew who the man was that killed her so she spent all her time and energy stalking Brett Parker. Not only did she lose her mind over it but suffered an injury and moved away changing her name to Nell.
Now she is being stalked...she can feel them watching and waiting...Her boyfriend Alex is another story and she begins to have trust issues not only with him but everyone. When dark secrets surface and threatening notes appear with the phrase "When I kill you", it becomes intense and this eerie edge also appears.
I beg for B.A. Paris's books and can't wait for the next one. The delivery at the end was a little different and not what I expected but it still had some appeal I enjoy with her books.
Thank you Edelweiss Books and St. Martin's Press for this ARC in exchange for my honest review.
14 years ago Elle witnessed a young woman make a terrible choice getting into the wrong car and ended up dead. She felt like she knew who the man was that killed her so she spent all her time and energy stalking Brett Parker. Not only did she lose her mind over it but suffered an injury and moved away changing her name to Nell.
Now she is being stalked...she can feel them watching and waiting...Her boyfriend Alex is another story and she begins to have trust issues not only with him but everyone. When dark secrets surface and threatening notes appear with the phrase "When I kill you", it becomes intense and this eerie edge also appears.
I beg for B.A. Paris's books and can't wait for the next one. The delivery at the end was a little different and not what I expected but it still had some appeal I enjoy with her books.
Thank you Edelweiss Books and St. Martin's Press for this ARC in exchange for my honest review.
Want to read
October 24, 2025Behind Closed Doors was one of the books that cemented my love for psychological thrillers.
Such a talented author
I cant wait for her new book to be released!
🖤🤍❤️🖤
Such a talented author
I cant wait for her new book to be released!
🖤🤍❤️🖤
February 17, 2026
Elle believes she witnesses who abducted and killed a young woman. She feels the police are not taking it seriously and decides to investigate it on her own. Things obviously don’t go well.
Fast-forward to the present and Elle now goes by the name Nell hoping to start fresh from the events of her past. (I wish Elle would have chosen a different name because trying to differentiate between the two as the book flip-flops timelines was a bit difficult. At least for me). She has a job she loves and is it the beginning stages of a new relationship. Her partner, Alex, spends alternating weeks between the US and London for his job. During the time that Nell is alone, she begins to suspect someone is following her.
This is one of those that not much happened, but being that the chapters are so short, you keep flipping the pages. It held my interest, but there wasn’t much beyond the stalker plot. The author does a good job of showing the fear and paranoia building up within Nell. If I had a choice, I’d say the past timeline I enjoyed more due to some of the poor decisions Elle made. It definitely had me shaking my head. The ending was fine. If this book were a movie, it would be something very similar to what you would find on LMN.
This is not one of my favorites by this author, but they all can’t be my favorite.
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher, for my advanced copy in exchange for an honest review.
Fast-forward to the present and Elle now goes by the name Nell hoping to start fresh from the events of her past. (I wish Elle would have chosen a different name because trying to differentiate between the two as the book flip-flops timelines was a bit difficult. At least for me). She has a job she loves and is it the beginning stages of a new relationship. Her partner, Alex, spends alternating weeks between the US and London for his job. During the time that Nell is alone, she begins to suspect someone is following her.
This is one of those that not much happened, but being that the chapters are so short, you keep flipping the pages. It held my interest, but there wasn’t much beyond the stalker plot. The author does a good job of showing the fear and paranoia building up within Nell. If I had a choice, I’d say the past timeline I enjoyed more due to some of the poor decisions Elle made. It definitely had me shaking my head. The ending was fine. If this book were a movie, it would be something very similar to what you would find on LMN.
This is not one of my favorites by this author, but they all can’t be my favorite.
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher, for my advanced copy in exchange for an honest review.
January 25, 2026
Tons of drama. Loved the killer's POV. Great to see the various storylines merging. Who could have tracked the victim down all these year's later. Why would someone be so obsessed with catching a killer she might be wrong about. Giving up a relationship. Forgetting herself in it all. Kept me very interested the entire way thru it.
February 22, 2026
MINOR SPOILERS
I’m sorry, B.A. Paris, but this was just boring. A terrible main character and a premise that was far more interesting than the book itself.
Is this the same author who wrote Behind Closed Doors? Because there is nothing exciting about this book.
Both the past and present versions of the female character are unbearable, obnoxious, and deeply unlikeable. I honestly wanted a bad ending for her. She did not deserve happiness after ruining so many people’s lives.
Repetitive and monotonous. The stalker POV was cheesy, especially with how every sentence seemed to end with the title of the book. Yes, we get it—you will kill her. Blah blah.
The twist? The stalker reveal? That’s it? After all the build-up, red herrings, hints, and flashbacks, this is the direction B.A. Paris chose? A crazed, obsessed woman with the hots for a guy she can’t have? Please.
Such a big, big letdown.
I’m sorry, B.A. Paris, but this was just boring. A terrible main character and a premise that was far more interesting than the book itself.
Is this the same author who wrote Behind Closed Doors? Because there is nothing exciting about this book.
Both the past and present versions of the female character are unbearable, obnoxious, and deeply unlikeable. I honestly wanted a bad ending for her. She did not deserve happiness after ruining so many people’s lives.
Repetitive and monotonous. The stalker POV was cheesy, especially with how every sentence seemed to end with the title of the book. Yes, we get it—you will kill her. Blah blah.
The twist? The stalker reveal? That’s it? After all the build-up, red herrings, hints, and flashbacks, this is the direction B.A. Paris chose? A crazed, obsessed woman with the hots for a guy she can’t have? Please.
Such a big, big letdown.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
January 2, 2026
Watching. Waiting. Unraveling. 🔪
I just closed the final page and I am still reeling. 😮💨
When I Kill You is one of those thrillers that immediately gets under your skin and refuses to let go.
👁️ The Hook
From the very beginning, the question of “Who is watching Nell Masters?” had me completely locked in. B.A. Paris expertly weaves Nell’s present-day fear with her past as Elle Nugent—a woman whose obsessive need to solve a murder once pushed her far too close to danger. That history hangs over every chapter, making it impossible to know whether Nell’s paranoia is justified… or a consequence of her own past.
🧠 The Tension
The feeling of being watched is palpable. I constantly found myself questioning where the real threat was coming from. Is it Brett Parker—the man Nell once accused—now turning the tables? Or is there something deeply off about her new partner, Alex? Every twist made me second-guess everything and everyone. The line between stalker and stalked becomes dangerously blurred, and I loved not knowing which way the story would tip.
⏳ The Pace
The pacing was spot on—tight, controlled, and steadily escalating. This was very much a “just one more chapter” read that had me glued to my Kindle well past my bedtime because I needed answers.
⚠️ Final Thoughts
When I Kill You is a clever, suspense-driven psychological thriller that showcases B.A. Paris’s talent for building paranoia and emotional tension. If you enjoy slow-burn thrillers that make you question every character and motive, this is absolutely one to add to your 2026 TBR. 🖤📚
🙏 Acknowledgments
Thank you to NetGalley, B.A. Paris, and St. Martin’s Press for providing me with this eARC in exchange for an honest review.
I just closed the final page and I am still reeling. 😮💨
When I Kill You is one of those thrillers that immediately gets under your skin and refuses to let go.
👁️ The Hook
From the very beginning, the question of “Who is watching Nell Masters?” had me completely locked in. B.A. Paris expertly weaves Nell’s present-day fear with her past as Elle Nugent—a woman whose obsessive need to solve a murder once pushed her far too close to danger. That history hangs over every chapter, making it impossible to know whether Nell’s paranoia is justified… or a consequence of her own past.
🧠 The Tension
The feeling of being watched is palpable. I constantly found myself questioning where the real threat was coming from. Is it Brett Parker—the man Nell once accused—now turning the tables? Or is there something deeply off about her new partner, Alex? Every twist made me second-guess everything and everyone. The line between stalker and stalked becomes dangerously blurred, and I loved not knowing which way the story would tip.
⏳ The Pace
The pacing was spot on—tight, controlled, and steadily escalating. This was very much a “just one more chapter” read that had me glued to my Kindle well past my bedtime because I needed answers.
⚠️ Final Thoughts
When I Kill You is a clever, suspense-driven psychological thriller that showcases B.A. Paris’s talent for building paranoia and emotional tension. If you enjoy slow-burn thrillers that make you question every character and motive, this is absolutely one to add to your 2026 TBR. 🖤📚
🙏 Acknowledgments
Thank you to NetGalley, B.A. Paris, and St. Martin’s Press for providing me with this eARC in exchange for an honest review.
December 10, 2025
Nell Masters is in a bucket full of doubt and feelings of being followed. Nell is not a total innocent in this regard as she was convinced that a man she thought she saw, hd a student named Bryony Sanders, get into his car. Later, Bryony was found dead and the car burnt.
Nell takes on an excellent case of OCD as she is convinced that she will bring this man to justice. In doing so, she, herself becomes a stalker and later into the story confronts some awful results.
Nell has a boyfriend named Alex who seems to also harbor some secrets as well. Alex has a job that takes him out of the country for weeks at a time, leaving Nell alone to fester and brood over the man she is convinced murdered, Bryony. It's crazy the lengths she goes to to prove herself right with not only dangerous consequences but also death.
I will say that I had trouble liking Nell. She had, I believe, borderline psychiatric problems stemming from her earlier life. Now, she is the one being stalked and knows her time on earth may be cut short because her stalker has decided that "I will kill you."
I will say the ending was somewhat of a surprise.
Nell takes on an excellent case of OCD as she is convinced that she will bring this man to justice. In doing so, she, herself becomes a stalker and later into the story confronts some awful results.
Nell has a boyfriend named Alex who seems to also harbor some secrets as well. Alex has a job that takes him out of the country for weeks at a time, leaving Nell alone to fester and brood over the man she is convinced murdered, Bryony. It's crazy the lengths she goes to to prove herself right with not only dangerous consequences but also death.
I will say that I had trouble liking Nell. She had, I believe, borderline psychiatric problems stemming from her earlier life. Now, she is the one being stalked and knows her time on earth may be cut short because her stalker has decided that "I will kill you."
I will say the ending was somewhat of a surprise.
November 12, 2025
I’ve read several B.A. Paris books over the years, and this one absolutely delivered the suspense I’ve come to expect! It maybe could’ve been a touch shorter, but honestly, I was too busy side-eyeing everyone trying to figure out who was watching Nell. The tension built so well that I was glued to the pages, convinced each new character was the culprit—I don’t think anyone escaped my suspicion.
The reveal was satisfying—one of my top guesses (always a small reader victory!)—and the stalker’s reasoning made perfect sense. I also really appreciated that Nell wasn’t your typical oblivious thriller heroine; she’s smart, self-aware, and actually pays attention to what’s happening around her.
Even with a few slower moments, this was a tense, twisty read that kept me hooked from start to finish!
** I received an ARC through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. Thanks to the author and publisher! **
The reveal was satisfying—one of my top guesses (always a small reader victory!)—and the stalker’s reasoning made perfect sense. I also really appreciated that Nell wasn’t your typical oblivious thriller heroine; she’s smart, self-aware, and actually pays attention to what’s happening around her.
Even with a few slower moments, this was a tense, twisty read that kept me hooked from start to finish!
** I received an ARC through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. Thanks to the author and publisher! **
February 13, 2026
Holy stalker! Ms. Paris, you have gained a new forever fan! I'm almost embarressed to say this is my very first book by this author, but I will most definitely be back for more! If crazy stalker vibes are your jam, this is your book! BUT, if crazy stalker getting stalked by a stalker is your vibe, then THIS BOOK is defintely for you!! This is a master class in how to write a psycholgical thriller!
⭐️Anxiety inducing!!!!
⭐️A chilling fast paced ride through Nelle's life - past and present
⭐️Filled with tension and shocking twists!
⭐️Adrenaline fueled-Nail biting suspense!
"I alwasy knew that my past life-when I was stil Elle Nugent, before I became Nell Masters-would one day catch up with me."
Nell has a keen sense that someone has been following her lately. She has a handsome boyfriend named Alex. Alex divides his time between the U.K. where Nelle lives and Washington for work. When he's not with her, she seems pretty paranoid that someone is after her. But who and why?Could her past be catching up with her?
When Nelle was Elle, she witnessed a girl getting into a car with a stranger only that girl turned up dead the next day. Elle became obsessed, and maybe that's an understatement, to find Bryony's killer. She ends up stalking the man she saw driving the car that Bryony got in before her death. He must be responsible, right? Elle finds out where he lives, and let's just say, her behavour could be characterized as that of a crazed mad woman. Or is she just an overly concerned citizen? Fast forward to present time, Nelle thinks that her actions from the past have now come back to haunt her and her stalker won't stop until Nelle gets what shes deserves. Or is there someone else from Nelle's present messing with her?
You will have to read to find out! Suspect everyone, trust noone!! I can promise you that this book will keep you up way too late because you won't want to put it down until you know who the stalker is!
4.5 ⭐️ rounded up to 5. I rated it 4.5 only because I guessed one of the twists, but I still enjoyed every second of the ride!!
Many, many thanks to NetGalley, St. Martin’s Press, and the author for a digital ARC of this book! All opinions are my own.
Available February 17, 2026!! ADD THIS TO YOUR TBR ASAP!!
⭐️Anxiety inducing!!!!
⭐️A chilling fast paced ride through Nelle's life - past and present
⭐️Filled with tension and shocking twists!
⭐️Adrenaline fueled-Nail biting suspense!
"I alwasy knew that my past life-when I was stil Elle Nugent, before I became Nell Masters-would one day catch up with me."
Nell has a keen sense that someone has been following her lately. She has a handsome boyfriend named Alex. Alex divides his time between the U.K. where Nelle lives and Washington for work. When he's not with her, she seems pretty paranoid that someone is after her. But who and why?Could her past be catching up with her?
When Nelle was Elle, she witnessed a girl getting into a car with a stranger only that girl turned up dead the next day. Elle became obsessed, and maybe that's an understatement, to find Bryony's killer. She ends up stalking the man she saw driving the car that Bryony got in before her death. He must be responsible, right? Elle finds out where he lives, and let's just say, her behavour could be characterized as that of a crazed mad woman. Or is she just an overly concerned citizen? Fast forward to present time, Nelle thinks that her actions from the past have now come back to haunt her and her stalker won't stop until Nelle gets what shes deserves. Or is there someone else from Nelle's present messing with her?
You will have to read to find out! Suspect everyone, trust noone!! I can promise you that this book will keep you up way too late because you won't want to put it down until you know who the stalker is!
4.5 ⭐️ rounded up to 5. I rated it 4.5 only because I guessed one of the twists, but I still enjoyed every second of the ride!!
Many, many thanks to NetGalley, St. Martin’s Press, and the author for a digital ARC of this book! All opinions are my own.
Available February 17, 2026!! ADD THIS TO YOUR TBR ASAP!!
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
B.A. Paris is one of the authors who pulled me into the thriller/mystery genre, so whenever she releases a book, I’m definitely going to check it out.
This story takes us between past and present, following Nell Masters, who in her past life went by Elle Nugent. Fourteen years earlier, she witnessed a student, Bryony Sanders, getting into a stranger’s car. The next day, Bryony was found murdered. Elle becomes obsessed with uncovering the killer’s identity. An obsession that slowly begins to negatively impact her life. Now, in the present, Nell believes her past may be coming back for vengeance…
Slow-burn thrillers can be hit or miss, and this one landed somewhere in the middle for me. Was it intriguing enough to keep me reading? Absolutely. But I did feel like it could have been a bit shorter. Some parts felt slightly repetitive, just written a little differently each time, which made me a bit bored in places.
I will say, I thought I was close to figuring it out, but I couldn’t fully piece it together. And honestly, I love that feeling. That final reveal, realizing what I missed, is always such a rush.
Overall, this was a 3.5-star read for me.
I want to thank Netgalley, B.A. Paris, and St. Martin's Press for the ARC. All options expressed in this review are my own.
This story takes us between past and present, following Nell Masters, who in her past life went by Elle Nugent. Fourteen years earlier, she witnessed a student, Bryony Sanders, getting into a stranger’s car. The next day, Bryony was found murdered. Elle becomes obsessed with uncovering the killer’s identity. An obsession that slowly begins to negatively impact her life. Now, in the present, Nell believes her past may be coming back for vengeance…
Slow-burn thrillers can be hit or miss, and this one landed somewhere in the middle for me. Was it intriguing enough to keep me reading? Absolutely. But I did feel like it could have been a bit shorter. Some parts felt slightly repetitive, just written a little differently each time, which made me a bit bored in places.
I will say, I thought I was close to figuring it out, but I couldn’t fully piece it together. And honestly, I love that feeling. That final reveal, realizing what I missed, is always such a rush.
Overall, this was a 3.5-star read for me.
I want to thank Netgalley, B.A. Paris, and St. Martin's Press for the ARC. All options expressed in this review are my own.
December 2, 2025
I will always read a B.A Paris book! The author has that classic thriller vibe mixed with domestic suspense that she always brings to the plot.
I think this was officially my favourite of the authors books! I enjoyed the stalker vibes with the written journal entries at the same time we were learning the history of the FMC and her involvement with an unsolved murder case. I also enjoyed the relationship dramas and the FMCs realization about what she wanted for her future.
I saw some people were disappointed by the ending but I personally liked it, I liked the way her bf trained her how to react in the situation (which we got a glimpse of in the opening chapter) and the way all our questions were answered. Overall a fun enjoyable read, I recommend trying the audiobook as the narrator did a great job!
I think this was officially my favourite of the authors books! I enjoyed the stalker vibes with the written journal entries at the same time we were learning the history of the FMC and her involvement with an unsolved murder case. I also enjoyed the relationship dramas and the FMCs realization about what she wanted for her future.
I saw some people were disappointed by the ending but I personally liked it, I liked the way her bf trained her how to react in the situation (which we got a glimpse of in the opening chapter) and the way all our questions were answered. Overall a fun enjoyable read, I recommend trying the audiobook as the narrator did a great job!
January 18, 2026
I’m so sad this is over 😭😭
Nell Masters has a feeling she’s being stalked. From the silent phone calls, to the dead flower deliveries, to the eery feeling she gets as she takes the bus home. Nell has every right to be on edge, since years before she went by Elle Nugent. In the previous identity she held, she witnessed the kidnapping of a young girl that led to her murder. She became obsessed with the case and was certain she knew the man who kidnapped her, leading her to stalking and harassing him. Her decisions led to her new identity and now as she feels herself being watched, she worries someone has discovered the secrets of her past.
As a big fan of “Behind Closed Doors”, I was super excited to dive into this new @baparisauthor novel! I’m such a hard thriller critic but I was hooked from page one. Such a unique and gripping premise that I could not tear my eyes from. I couldn’t guess the twist as hard as I tried, although I had my suspicions. This is one of my new favourite thrillers and although I wish the ending was a bit more of a shock, I still loved this book so much!
Out Feb 17! Thanks so much @netgalley for letting me get my hands on this one early!
Nell Masters has a feeling she’s being stalked. From the silent phone calls, to the dead flower deliveries, to the eery feeling she gets as she takes the bus home. Nell has every right to be on edge, since years before she went by Elle Nugent. In the previous identity she held, she witnessed the kidnapping of a young girl that led to her murder. She became obsessed with the case and was certain she knew the man who kidnapped her, leading her to stalking and harassing him. Her decisions led to her new identity and now as she feels herself being watched, she worries someone has discovered the secrets of her past.
As a big fan of “Behind Closed Doors”, I was super excited to dive into this new @baparisauthor novel! I’m such a hard thriller critic but I was hooked from page one. Such a unique and gripping premise that I could not tear my eyes from. I couldn’t guess the twist as hard as I tried, although I had my suspicions. This is one of my new favourite thrillers and although I wish the ending was a bit more of a shock, I still loved this book so much!
Out Feb 17! Thanks so much @netgalley for letting me get my hands on this one early!
November 13, 2025
This was my first read from the author, and I can say with confidence, it won't be my last. I had a lot of fun with this weird, twisty story and all its flawed characters. I loved that I wasn't always absolutely sure I could trust our MC. Was she reliable? Unreliable? Sane? Was she crazy? Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe she was a little of it all.
This was just a fun read, that while I guessed the ending, it didn't even matter because I enjoyed it so much. I will absolutely be seeking out more from this author in the future.
*ARC provided by the publisher in exchange for an honest review.*
This was just a fun read, that while I guessed the ending, it didn't even matter because I enjoyed it so much. I will absolutely be seeking out more from this author in the future.
*ARC provided by the publisher in exchange for an honest review.*
November 12, 2025
I received a free copy of, When I Kill You, by B. A Paris, from the publisher and Netgalley in exchange for an honest review. Nell used to be Elle, which is one of her many secrets. Nell feels like someone is watching her. What a thrilling read, a real who done it.
January 1, 2026
Ik vond het een super vermakelijk boek en heb het dan ook in één zit uitgelezen. Wel vond ik het best langdradig worden en gaf het mij niet echt het “wow” gevoel wat ik hoop te krijgen bij een psychologische thriller.
February 23, 2026
There were chapters scattered throughout this book from a notebook, and at the end of every notebook chapter it ended with "and when I kill you." There are plenty of moments in this book that pissed me off, but this one was the worst offense.
November 30, 2025
Big thanks to the publisher for granting me an ARC of this book. I wish I could offer a more positive review, but I found the story repetitive, farfetched, and not at all thrilling.
The protagonist, Nell, is an extremely unsympathetic character: self-absorbed, hysterical, naive. In her early 20s, Nell (who at the time goes by Elle) believes she knows who kidnapped and killed a young American woman. Despite warnings from the police, she begins stalking the "suspect," which leads to tragedy: two men dead, two families destroyed.
The past showcases a woman seeped in madness and obsession. Nell loses her job, her boyfriend, her friends, all because she's certain (with no proof whatsoever, indeed with claims to the contrary) that a man got away with murder.
The problem is that Nell hasn't learned a damn thing. Fast forward a few years: Nell is now 36 and lives a quiet life. She works at a charity (something to do with helping the disadvantaged) and keeps to herself. Nell believes she's being followed, so in essence the one-time hunter becomes the prey.
She assumes she knows who's targeting her (once again with no evidence) but doesn't do a damn thing about it besides sleeping on the couch (because that's so much safer) and double-checking that her windows and doors are locked.
Wait, my bad: At one point, Nell stands in her bedroom window holding a knife and mouths, I'm waiting for you like a terrible parody of an 80s slasher film. Was this scene supposed to be creepy? Scary? Not sure, but it made me laugh.
Besides hating on Nell, I have a slew of additional grievances:
We are led to believe there is a connection between the past and the present; that connection never gels.
Nell's romance with a Franco-American named Alex takes over the plot. I didn't sign up to read a bodice ripper, and while the sex was kept off page for the most part, it still felt gratuitous and distracting. Nell lurves Alex so much, but she also believes he might be a killer. Like, girl, why are you with him then?
Alex has this whole backstory with a mysterious job and a 20-year-old son who's arrested for possession of cannabis. Okay, and this is relevant because? Beyond that, he has no personality whatsoever.
A secondary character dies (in a completely OTT fashion), but everyone moves on within five minutes, including the parter of the deceased. Yeah, that's not how grief works.
The chapters, in italics, from the stalker's POV are hella cringe. Each one ends with, "We won't be [insert random, mundane phrase here], when I kill you." E.g., We won't be doing crosswords, when I kill you; we'll hardly be discussing our favorite perfumes, when I kill you; we'll hardly be discussing our favorite pastries, when I kill you.
This was so painfully awkward, I found myself making a grimace face every time.
In an effort to keep the suspense going, the author refers to the stalker with the gender-neutral they, which is odd since Nell is certain her stalker is a man and would have naturally thought of the stalker as he.
The author's clumsy attempt at obfuscation was a dead giveaway, and I guessed the identity of the stalker long before Nell figured it out.
Speaking of the stalker, what was the point of the stalking if the objective was to get rid of Nell as quickly as possible? The stalker wastes so much time and energy sneaking around in a ninja outfit, hiding under Nell's bed, picking locks, writing in a notebook. Why not just get on with it already?
The story is set in England, but there is no sense of place. Indeed, everyone talks like an American. Huh?
The protagonist, Nell, is an extremely unsympathetic character: self-absorbed, hysterical, naive. In her early 20s, Nell (who at the time goes by Elle) believes she knows who kidnapped and killed a young American woman. Despite warnings from the police, she begins stalking the "suspect," which leads to tragedy: two men dead, two families destroyed.
The past showcases a woman seeped in madness and obsession. Nell loses her job, her boyfriend, her friends, all because she's certain (with no proof whatsoever, indeed with claims to the contrary) that a man got away with murder.
The problem is that Nell hasn't learned a damn thing. Fast forward a few years: Nell is now 36 and lives a quiet life. She works at a charity (something to do with helping the disadvantaged) and keeps to herself. Nell believes she's being followed, so in essence the one-time hunter becomes the prey.
She assumes she knows who's targeting her (once again with no evidence) but doesn't do a damn thing about it besides sleeping on the couch (because that's so much safer) and double-checking that her windows and doors are locked.
Wait, my bad: At one point, Nell stands in her bedroom window holding a knife and mouths, I'm waiting for you like a terrible parody of an 80s slasher film. Was this scene supposed to be creepy? Scary? Not sure, but it made me laugh.
Besides hating on Nell, I have a slew of additional grievances:
We are led to believe there is a connection between the past and the present; that connection never gels.
Nell's romance with a Franco-American named Alex takes over the plot. I didn't sign up to read a bodice ripper, and while the sex was kept off page for the most part, it still felt gratuitous and distracting. Nell lurves Alex so much, but she also believes he might be a killer. Like, girl, why are you with him then?
Alex has this whole backstory with a mysterious job and a 20-year-old son who's arrested for possession of cannabis. Okay, and this is relevant because? Beyond that, he has no personality whatsoever.
A secondary character dies (in a completely OTT fashion), but everyone moves on within five minutes, including the parter of the deceased. Yeah, that's not how grief works.
The chapters, in italics, from the stalker's POV are hella cringe. Each one ends with, "We won't be [insert random, mundane phrase here], when I kill you." E.g., We won't be doing crosswords, when I kill you; we'll hardly be discussing our favorite perfumes, when I kill you; we'll hardly be discussing our favorite pastries, when I kill you.
This was so painfully awkward, I found myself making a grimace face every time.
In an effort to keep the suspense going, the author refers to the stalker with the gender-neutral they, which is odd since Nell is certain her stalker is a man and would have naturally thought of the stalker as he.
The author's clumsy attempt at obfuscation was a dead giveaway, and I guessed the identity of the stalker long before Nell figured it out.
Speaking of the stalker, what was the point of the stalking if the objective was to get rid of Nell as quickly as possible? The stalker wastes so much time and energy sneaking around in a ninja outfit, hiding under Nell's bed, picking locks, writing in a notebook. Why not just get on with it already?
The story is set in England, but there is no sense of place. Indeed, everyone talks like an American. Huh?
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
I really struggled with the rating of this book, and I am feeling generous and gave it a 3. It was stilted and disjointed, and didn't have a great flow. Also Elle/Nell was very annoying, not a likeable character at all. There was some suspense, bit the story just didn't tie together well. We'll just say, this wasn't my favorite read.
Thank you to Net Galley and St Martin's Press for allowing me to read this ARC in exchange for my honest review.
Thank you to Net Galley and St Martin's Press for allowing me to read this ARC in exchange for my honest review.
December 14, 2025
WHEN I KILL YOU kept me on my toes. I liked that there were snippets from the killer throughout the story. I never could have predicted the ending either, which is always a plus for me. The narrator was wonderful and kept me fully engaged the entire time. It's definitely one of my favorites from B.A. Paris to date.
Many thanks to Macmillan Audio for my gifted ALC.
Many thanks to Macmillan Audio for my gifted ALC.
November 24, 2025
Please note that I received this book via NetGalley. This did not impact my rating or review.
I have to say that parts of this story didn't really work such as the unknown narrator ending each excerpt with 'when I kill you', and the lack of chemistry between Nell and Alex. That said, I couldn't put it down. I won't lie though, I started to just skim the excerpts by the unknown narrator because I was tired of them.
When I Kill You follows a woman named Nell who has a past she does not talk about. It takes a while to get there, but we find out in the Elle chapters labeled "Elle: Past" that Elle was happily in love with her boyfriend Jaz, and then one nights he sees a teenage girl who gets her phone snatched. Elle goes out and sees the man face who drives her away. Days later the girl she saw is found dead and Elle believes she knows the man that did it. She quickly reports this to the police and finds herself obsessing over the man and him getting away with murder. "Nell: Present" shows us Elle years later and who has kept herself apart from forming friendships or a relationship, until she meets a man named Alex that she is in love with and wants to have a future with. One issue is that Nell thinks she's being stalked due to her actions when she was Elle and is scared to let Alex or anyone else know. In between those before and afters we also get extracts from notebooks written by an unknown person who is following Nell and is planning on killing her.
I really found Elle aggravating, but I think Paris wrote her that way on purpose. Her insistence on someone being a murder and doing her amaetur investigating really was a send-up I thought of tons of thrillers out there with the main character being a woman and somehow smarter than the police. Paris also does a great job of showing the para-social relationship people like Elle have with the police and the suspects. Heck, I see it now with so called true-crime people on social media. They will hound someone to death trying to accuse them of being murders not based on any evidence. To this day, I still shake my head on the real life people who keep hounding people connected to the Watts Family murders because they are insistent the police let someone get away with murder. Don't get me started on the terribleness still going on with the Idaho Four cases. We don't get a lot of details about this case but when we jump back to Nell in the present, she still thinks she was correct and woo boy I won't get into spoilers, but I was at one point wishing she would get murdered because she was just kind of awful.
The other characters we get details on, but there's not much there. I also had to call BS on Nell and Alex. She is dating a guy that is only around for about a week a month and they have been dating 5 months, I didn't buy them being loved up at all. And Nell having no sense about Googling the guy but being angry that he has been hiding things from her (yeah, pot kettle) was kind of hilarious.
The flow of the book was quite good. I found myself anxious to get back to the Elle portions to find out what in the world did happen more than 10 years ago and how it tied to Nell's present.
The ending though I thought was kind of a cop-out. I just think it wrapped too neatly and I wish again there had been some revelations for Nell that she had the worst instincts ever about everything.
I have to say that parts of this story didn't really work such as the unknown narrator ending each excerpt with 'when I kill you', and the lack of chemistry between Nell and Alex. That said, I couldn't put it down. I won't lie though, I started to just skim the excerpts by the unknown narrator because I was tired of them.
When I Kill You follows a woman named Nell who has a past she does not talk about. It takes a while to get there, but we find out in the Elle chapters labeled "Elle: Past" that Elle was happily in love with her boyfriend Jaz, and then one nights he sees a teenage girl who gets her phone snatched. Elle goes out and sees the man face who drives her away. Days later the girl she saw is found dead and Elle believes she knows the man that did it. She quickly reports this to the police and finds herself obsessing over the man and him getting away with murder. "Nell: Present" shows us Elle years later and who has kept herself apart from forming friendships or a relationship, until she meets a man named Alex that she is in love with and wants to have a future with. One issue is that Nell thinks she's being stalked due to her actions when she was Elle and is scared to let Alex or anyone else know. In between those before and afters we also get extracts from notebooks written by an unknown person who is following Nell and is planning on killing her.
I really found Elle aggravating, but I think Paris wrote her that way on purpose. Her insistence on someone being a murder and doing her amaetur investigating really was a send-up I thought of tons of thrillers out there with the main character being a woman and somehow smarter than the police. Paris also does a great job of showing the para-social relationship people like Elle have with the police and the suspects. Heck, I see it now with so called true-crime people on social media. They will hound someone to death trying to accuse them of being murders not based on any evidence. To this day, I still shake my head on the real life people who keep hounding people connected to the Watts Family murders because they are insistent the police let someone get away with murder. Don't get me started on the terribleness still going on with the Idaho Four cases. We don't get a lot of details about this case but when we jump back to Nell in the present, she still thinks she was correct and woo boy I won't get into spoilers, but I was at one point wishing she would get murdered because she was just kind of awful.
The other characters we get details on, but there's not much there. I also had to call BS on Nell and Alex. She is dating a guy that is only around for about a week a month and they have been dating 5 months, I didn't buy them being loved up at all. And Nell having no sense about Googling the guy but being angry that he has been hiding things from her (yeah, pot kettle) was kind of hilarious.
The flow of the book was quite good. I found myself anxious to get back to the Elle portions to find out what in the world did happen more than 10 years ago and how it tied to Nell's present.
The ending though I thought was kind of a cop-out. I just think it wrapped too neatly and I wish again there had been some revelations for Nell that she had the worst instincts ever about everything.
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