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The New Rules of Dining Out: An Insider's Guide to Enjoying Restaurants
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Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews
March 29, 2026
I almost never write reviews, but have to say this - this book should not have been written. It’s 150 pages of “be nice to the waiter, and find the positive in a negative” and is much better suited as a kindergarten lesson than a book for adults. It could be a substack essay but absolutely should not be a hardcover taking $30 of someone’s money.
The way it was advertised, I expected to learn actual rules for fine dining restaurants - the basics of how to read a wine menu, expected etiquette that differs from normal restaurants, etc.
Instead, it’s 150 pages of “keep calm if something goes wrong” which is really advice that most functioning adults are already aware of. I believe that in a restaurant, servers aren’t necessarily seeing that emotional intelligence in clientele, but those people also likely aren’t reading this book.
The cherry on top was the author’s anecdote 2/3 of the way in of the time *he* was incredibly rude at a dinner, to the point he made the rest of his party uncomfortable, over a very minor food delay. I was trying to give him the benefit of the doubt that he’d seen some horrible guests over the years while working in restaurants, and writing this book was therapeutic because of that. Turns out he also behaves horribly.
Call me crazy but I’ve also had all manner of unfortunate experiences in restaurants - wrong food, late seating, bad food, rude waiters - it’s never occurred to me to do anything more than make the most of the experience and probably not return to the restaurant.
The way it was advertised, I expected to learn actual rules for fine dining restaurants - the basics of how to read a wine menu, expected etiquette that differs from normal restaurants, etc.
Instead, it’s 150 pages of “keep calm if something goes wrong” which is really advice that most functioning adults are already aware of. I believe that in a restaurant, servers aren’t necessarily seeing that emotional intelligence in clientele, but those people also likely aren’t reading this book.
The cherry on top was the author’s anecdote 2/3 of the way in of the time *he* was incredibly rude at a dinner, to the point he made the rest of his party uncomfortable, over a very minor food delay. I was trying to give him the benefit of the doubt that he’d seen some horrible guests over the years while working in restaurants, and writing this book was therapeutic because of that. Turns out he also behaves horribly.
Call me crazy but I’ve also had all manner of unfortunate experiences in restaurants - wrong food, late seating, bad food, rude waiters - it’s never occurred to me to do anything more than make the most of the experience and probably not return to the restaurant.
September 25, 2026
There's a reviewer below who said something like, "There's no need for this book to have been written." LOL, I'm gonna take a *wild guess* that that person never worked in a restaurant before. Trust me, a LOT of people could sorely benefit from many of the insights and advice that Reiner offers here.
Anyway, as someone who waited tables for many years back in my twenties & thirties, I really enjoyed this and often found myself nodding in agreement—sometimes ruefully so (and I even learned a few things too). I love Reiner's proselytizing for the notion that diners have everything to gain from making the dining out experience a collaborative effort with the restaurant and much to lose by going in with a sense of entitlement or a chip on the shoulder about any number of things. That may seem like simplicity itself to readers like the one I referenced above, but people are, you know, complicated. And the customer is NOT always right.
Anyway, recommended for restaurant aficionados and foodies alike. ***1/2
Anyway, as someone who waited tables for many years back in my twenties & thirties, I really enjoyed this and often found myself nodding in agreement—sometimes ruefully so (and I even learned a few things too). I love Reiner's proselytizing for the notion that diners have everything to gain from making the dining out experience a collaborative effort with the restaurant and much to lose by going in with a sense of entitlement or a chip on the shoulder about any number of things. That may seem like simplicity itself to readers like the one I referenced above, but people are, you know, complicated. And the customer is NOT always right.
Anyway, recommended for restaurant aficionados and foodies alike. ***1/2
March 31, 2026
A useful and entertaining read. I agree with the author that it would be great if all people could work in a restaurant at some point in their lives to gain understanding of how it all works, but failing that, people should at least read this book. It's an etiquette guide from an insider's perspective with practical advice delivered through fun, relatable anecdotes as well as some more direct instructions. The author's obvious love of food and restaurants shines through, and it's clear that he wants us all to get the most out of our dining experiences. Also, his descriptions of menu items will make you really hungry :)
October 4, 2025
Wow. This one belongs on everyone’s shelf. If you’re like me and love dining out AND ALSO want to be sure you’re treating everyone at the restaurant with the respect and consideration they want and deserve, this book’s for you. One of the craziest parts is that the writing is complex and insightful but also, strangely and wonderfully, is very funny and down to earth. I felt like I was being personally coached by an insider on what to do and not to do in modern restaurants. Wow. Required reading for any modern, caring person who loves dining.
October 14, 2026
I don't think rude people who are mean to restaurant staff will ever pick up this book so it is a little bit confusing WHO exactly this is written for.
As a bartender I was wondering if I'd gain any insights from reading this customer etiquette manual... I would say I didn't (it is all common sense for people who treat others decently) but it has sparked my interest in learning more about etiquette in general!
I'll say maybe this book will be valuable anthropologically in the future when someone wants to understand post-pandemic dining culture.
As a bartender I was wondering if I'd gain any insights from reading this customer etiquette manual... I would say I didn't (it is all common sense for people who treat others decently) but it has sparked my interest in learning more about etiquette in general!
I'll say maybe this book will be valuable anthropologically in the future when someone wants to understand post-pandemic dining culture.
October 4, 2025
As a diner, I've been rushed, inconvenienced and sometimes forgotten altogether. But thanks to Reiner's The New Rules of Dining Out, I've never felt more welcomed.
Reiner's book is a guide for people to understand how to treat people, not just in restaurants, but in life. He reminds diners that dining out should be an experience to share with those close to us.
5 stars - give it a read!
Reiner's book is a guide for people to understand how to treat people, not just in restaurants, but in life. He reminds diners that dining out should be an experience to share with those close to us.
5 stars - give it a read!
October 7, 2025
“The New Rules of Dining Out” is like having a savvy restaurant friend whisper tips in your ear while you eat. Adam Reiner mixes 20+ years of insider know-how with plenty of humor, turning tricky moments like sending food back or asking for wine help into easy, even fun interactions. It’s smart, relatable, and makes you realize dining out isn’t just about the food, it’s about enjoying the whole experience without the awkwardness.
September 30, 2025
A true look inside the minds of those of us in the industry. Not just a peek behind the curtain, but Adam throws the curtain wide open to reveal the mindset of seasoned servers and restaurant staff. There’s insight on how to set yourself up to have a great dining experience and build a better relationship with the restaurants you love. A fun read.
December 17, 2025
One of those books that’s probably more useful for the people who will never read it. Most of this will be familiar to anyone who regularly goes to restaurants and is a decent human being. It’s well written and I would say there is a lot of value here that will be unlocked in future decades when people look back on the norms and standards of dining post-pandemic.
October 4, 2025
“The book is filled with entertaining anecdotes from the author’s 20 year career in fine dining restaurants. It really opened my eyes to what goes on behind the scenes. I’m excited to try out some of his dining tips.”
October 4, 2025
I am not a food oriented person - to the extent that last year for Christmas my mother sent me a map to my own kitchen. And yet, Reiner's wit and patient experience introduced me to a culinary world I cannot wait to engage with and now feel comfortable enough to enjoy.
Read
October 9, 2026Revealing peeks into the mechanics and logistics of running a restaurant with some insightful tips about creating a good dining experience. The rest is general advice about interacting with other humans.
January 24, 2026
All solid tips. Not much new but definitely useful.
January 28, 2026
Adam will always be a trusted source for restaurants and everything related
December 6, 2025
This is the kind of book that you may initially think is unnecessary. Don't people know how to dine out? Is there something complicated about eating in a restaurant?
The answers are No and Yes.
Reiner's argument is that dining out is a scene of complicated social interactions and that just being aware of them will often lead to better experiences. We often think of restaurants as places to serve us--which they are---but we often don't consider how what we bring to the table (so to speak) affects that experience. And this is not simply a book that says things like "Be nice to waiters" or "Don't order fish on a Monday." It examines, in enthusiastic prose, how restaurants work. Once you know more about the ecosystem of a restaurant, you'll get more out of visiting them, just as how knowing more about baseball will enrich a trip to the ballpark.
It's wholly unpretentious and fun to read, as well. Highly recommended!
The answers are No and Yes.
Reiner's argument is that dining out is a scene of complicated social interactions and that just being aware of them will often lead to better experiences. We often think of restaurants as places to serve us--which they are---but we often don't consider how what we bring to the table (so to speak) affects that experience. And this is not simply a book that says things like "Be nice to waiters" or "Don't order fish on a Monday." It examines, in enthusiastic prose, how restaurants work. Once you know more about the ecosystem of a restaurant, you'll get more out of visiting them, just as how knowing more about baseball will enrich a trip to the ballpark.
It's wholly unpretentious and fun to read, as well. Highly recommended!
October 4, 2025
Not worth reading. Most tips are common sense.
Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews