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416 pages, Paperback
First published January 19, 2016









Koume and Keisuke both have a void they’re trying to fill –– mostly with sex. They’re either apathetic or depressed, or shackin’ up. There’s a ton of graphic content (18+), but if you’re looking for hentai, this is definitely not it. There are themes of depression, loneliness, connection, and meaning, so.. yeah, definitely not your standard hentai material.
Initially, Keisuke is a booty call for Koume because that’s all she’ll give him. He wants more, he thinks. But it’s not really Koume he wants. He’s depressed over his brother’s death and dealing with suicidal thoughts, and his attempts to connect with Koume are to distract from his emotions. And I think he sees himself mirrored in Koume and hopes for connection. His reach out to Koume seems like he's blindly feeling around in the dark for what he’s missing. At first it seems sweet, like maybe his feelings are genuine. But it’s fleeting, as he slowly spirals into his issues and pushes Koume away because what he’s doing with her isn’t what he’s looking for.
Koume tries to fill her void by.. well, filling her anatomical void, which of course doesn’t work. As Keisuke drifts away from her, and further into his depression, her emotional attachment to Keisuke grows. She wants to recapture the interest he initially had for her, but again, it’s like grasping at straws. She doesn’t truly know what will fill the emptiness. But it seems as he loses interest, and gets more depressed, it makes her want him more. These two are never on the same page.
Sex plays a key role in this story. There’s no satisfaction in it. They’re either going through the motions to pass time or trying to see if it’ll create the connection they’re looking for.
The sea is another recurring element. For Keisuke, the ocean reminds him of his brother’s death. Koume goes to the beach looking for the random things others have lost there. It acts as a way to connect random people. Frequently, Koume stands on the shore and just stares out into the ocean. And in the end, Koume comes to an almost delirious realization that she’s found her something bigger –– the ocean, as it’s literally bigger.
The meaning I took from it in the end is that humans are small and insignificant, and our issues always feel bigger than they are. I think that’s what Koume sees when she looks at the ocean. We’re all looking for something more. To mean something to someone else, to have shared experiences, to be understood. But like Koume’s excursions on the beach, when she’s looking for both nothing and something without a clue, it’s random happenstance that she finds something she wants –– both in life and on the beach.
In the end, I’m left feeling that Keisuke is still grasping at the next thing that will fill his emptiness, though he does seem reinvigorated as it seems he’s interpreted a random occurrence as fate. I still kind of hate him though. He’s mostly a jerk. I don’t know whether Koume has come to find what she’s looking for or if her realizations will be fleeting. And I still don’t know that I’ve gotten the intended meaning out of the story.
But mostly I’m left feeling like Eeyore. Melancholy. “We read to know we’re not alone.” In this case, reading it made me feel alone, and then gave me company in my aloneness. And yet overall, I still liked it. It’s weird. These kids are weird and depressing, and this book did not bring out my happy, and yet I keep flipping back through it trying to figure out what it all means. Much like life I suppose. But it’s all just random and open for interpretation. Maybe that’s the meaning! I don’t know. This book is giving me pseudo-epiphanies.
One thing less debatable is that the art is absolutely beautiful. Specifically, the detail in the landscapes is amazing. I bought this solely because of the cover, so simply on an aesthetic ground, it wins major points.
I’d say read this if you want to wallow (sometimes I’m in a wallowing mood, maybe I’m not alone and this book was made to let me know that –– hey, maybe THAT’S the meaning!). Also great for those in the midst of an existential crisis, though it won’t provide any answers. And if you’re not in an existential crisis yet, this book may put you there.



