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A Small Madness
Rose didn't tell anyone about it. She wondered if it showed. She looked at herself in the mirror and turned this way and then that way. She stood as close to the mirror as she could, leaning over the bathroom basin, looking into her own eyes until they disappeared behind the fog of her breath. Looking for something. Some evidence that she was different now. Something had shifted inside her, a gear being ratcheted over a clunky cog, gaining torque, starting her up. But it didn't show. How could all of these feelings not show? She was a woman now but it didn't show and she couldn't tell anyone.
A devastating, compelling novel that will get everyone talking, from the author of Creepy and Maud.
A devastating, compelling novel that will get everyone talking, from the author of Creepy and Maud.
231 pages, Paperback
First published February 1, 2015
6 people are currently reading
680 people want to read
About the author
Dianne Touchell
5 books33 followersDianne Touchell is a middle child who feared Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy — and any other stranger who threatened to break into the house at night.
She has worked, amongst other things, as a nightclub singer, a fish and chip shop counter girl (not with Pauline Hanson) and a bookseller. Dianne would rather talk to her dog than answer the phone.
She has worked, amongst other things, as a nightclub singer, a fish and chip shop counter girl (not with Pauline Hanson) and a bookseller. Dianne would rather talk to her dog than answer the phone.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 100 reviews
February 18, 2015
Actual Rating: 3.5
This review appears on Happy Indulgence - check it out for more reviews!
A Small Madness packs a punch in its short length. Going into the book without knowing anything about it, really had me unprepared for the emotional journey ahead. This is not an easy read. But it’s an important one.
It all starts from one small mistake: unprotected sex leading into teenage pregnancy. The book does not hold back on the gory details, and explores every single consequence right through to the end. What starts out as one innocent decision, will lead to a journey of heartache and change, and the story really jerked my emotions about. From the emotional turmoil of the teen parents, to their loss of hope for the future, to their withdrawal from everyday life and the desperation of their actions, A Small Madness clasped my heart and didn’t let go.
There are themes in the book that will make you uncomfortable, from the awkward approach to sex, the gory details of pregnancy, to the slut shaming of Rose’s best friend. This is a harsh, confronting novel containing bullying, teenage pregnancy, self harm, depression and mental illness. It’s dark, it’s edgy, and I felt like it would be relatable to those who have experienced a similar journey. I appreciated how it didn’t sugar coat the details, and was somewhat horrified by what I found within it’s pages.
The book has a strong focus on friendship and family as a support network, which was important to help the characters with what they were going through. It was refreshing to see Michael and Roses parents as a key part of their lives, even though they reacted in different ways.
Everything in the book is somber and depressing, with the consequences escalated to the very extreme. This made the book seem a bit too unrealistic and over-emphasised, especially towards the end of the book. It’s filled with drama and emotional turmoil, and I think Rose’s downward spiral illustrated the point perfectly. I did feel that the consequences of the her actions became a bit too far-fetched, leaving us with unresolved discomfort at the end of the book. The ending kind of leads off abruptly, not in a satisfactory manner. But the story had been told by then, and the point was made.
Instead of subtlety, it likes to drive the point hard that teenage pregnancy has negative consequences. Teenage pregnancy is life-changing, but it’s not the end of the world, like the book portrays. Where’s the beauty in having a child? Where’s the joy that you will feel upon being responsible for a young kid? None of this is mentioned. It’s a dark and depressing read, that serves as a cautionary tale but not everyone will agree with it’s approach.
A Small Madness is a raw, emotional and honest story of teenage pregnancy and the psychological consequences of it covering everything to its finest detail. It contains some very important messages in the book, that teenage pregnancy can happen to the best of us and it can have some very negative consequences.
Thank you to Allen and Unwin Australia for sending me this book in exchange for an honest review.
This review appears on Happy Indulgence - check it out for more reviews!
A Small Madness packs a punch in its short length. Going into the book without knowing anything about it, really had me unprepared for the emotional journey ahead. This is not an easy read. But it’s an important one.
It all starts from one small mistake: unprotected sex leading into teenage pregnancy. The book does not hold back on the gory details, and explores every single consequence right through to the end. What starts out as one innocent decision, will lead to a journey of heartache and change, and the story really jerked my emotions about. From the emotional turmoil of the teen parents, to their loss of hope for the future, to their withdrawal from everyday life and the desperation of their actions, A Small Madness clasped my heart and didn’t let go.
There are themes in the book that will make you uncomfortable, from the awkward approach to sex, the gory details of pregnancy, to the slut shaming of Rose’s best friend. This is a harsh, confronting novel containing bullying, teenage pregnancy, self harm, depression and mental illness. It’s dark, it’s edgy, and I felt like it would be relatable to those who have experienced a similar journey. I appreciated how it didn’t sugar coat the details, and was somewhat horrified by what I found within it’s pages.
The book has a strong focus on friendship and family as a support network, which was important to help the characters with what they were going through. It was refreshing to see Michael and Roses parents as a key part of their lives, even though they reacted in different ways.
Everything in the book is somber and depressing, with the consequences escalated to the very extreme. This made the book seem a bit too unrealistic and over-emphasised, especially towards the end of the book. It’s filled with drama and emotional turmoil, and I think Rose’s downward spiral illustrated the point perfectly. I did feel that the consequences of the her actions became a bit too far-fetched, leaving us with unresolved discomfort at the end of the book. The ending kind of leads off abruptly, not in a satisfactory manner. But the story had been told by then, and the point was made.
Instead of subtlety, it likes to drive the point hard that teenage pregnancy has negative consequences. Teenage pregnancy is life-changing, but it’s not the end of the world, like the book portrays. Where’s the beauty in having a child? Where’s the joy that you will feel upon being responsible for a young kid? None of this is mentioned. It’s a dark and depressing read, that serves as a cautionary tale but not everyone will agree with it’s approach.
A Small Madness is a raw, emotional and honest story of teenage pregnancy and the psychological consequences of it covering everything to its finest detail. It contains some very important messages in the book, that teenage pregnancy can happen to the best of us and it can have some very negative consequences.
Thank you to Allen and Unwin Australia for sending me this book in exchange for an honest review.
January 19, 2019
Rose and Michael are in love. They’ve been dating for ages, and they’re in the final year of high-school. He’s going to be a doctor, she’s going to be an actress, and they already know they’re going to get married.
Which is why, despite their religious beliefs, they start having sex. They’re going to spend their lives together anyway, so why wait?
The first two times they don’t use a condom because they get caught up in the moment and forget, but they’re careful after that. And it’s not like either of them has been with anyone else before, so they’re safe from diseases.
But then Rose realises she’s been waiting for her period, waiting for months, and when it doesn’t come, she knows what it must mean. The pregnancy test confirms her suspicion. But she can’t be pregnant, it’ll ruin all her plans. She’s got year 12 exams to pass.
Thus begins the tale of one girl’s unplanned pregnancy and her descent into unhealthy denial, and a kind of madness.
The rest of this review can be found here!
Hmm, so apparently the link had an issue. Fixed now!
Rose had been pretending to be someone else the day that Michael decided he loved her. She was in the middle of dress rehearsal for the school play, standing on the stage in the school gym, her voice ricocheting off the polished boards with an intensity that set his bones ringing like a tuning fork.
Which is why, despite their religious beliefs, they start having sex. They’re going to spend their lives together anyway, so why wait?
He’d eaten an orange. His fingers were sticky with it and smelled strongly of that pith-muck that collects under your fingernails after peeling the rind off. She didn’t care – they were in love. She let him put his sticky hands in places her own had never been.
The first two times they don’t use a condom because they get caught up in the moment and forget, but they’re careful after that. And it’s not like either of them has been with anyone else before, so they’re safe from diseases.
But then Rose realises she’s been waiting for her period, waiting for months, and when it doesn’t come, she knows what it must mean. The pregnancy test confirms her suspicion. But she can’t be pregnant, it’ll ruin all her plans. She’s got year 12 exams to pass.
‘I have plans, too,’ Rose reiterated. ‘I have a future.’
And Liv said, ‘Not anymore.’
Thus begins the tale of one girl’s unplanned pregnancy and her descent into unhealthy denial, and a kind of madness.
The rest of this review can be found here!
Hmm, so apparently the link had an issue. Fixed now!
January 27, 2015
‘A Small Madness’ is the new contemporary young adult novel from Australian author Dianne Touchell, whose debut novel ‘Creepy & Maud’ was CBCA-shortlisted.
I’m sort of going to tell you what this book’s about. It’s not really clear from the blurb or cover … but I don’t know how to praise it without telling you a little bit.
Rose and Michael started dating, “almost by accident,” but when we first meet them they’re having sex for the first time because they’re in love and ready. Afterwards Rose can’t believe that nobody can tell how changed she is, now suddenly a woman. Michael wants to know when they can do it again.
And then Rose starts watching the calendar; “she was watching the calendar the way you watch a spider in the corner of a room you can’t leave. Each day that passed was a spider leg twitching …”
This is a book about Michael and Rose’s journey down a winding road they can’t seem to find their way back from. It’s about how one small madness leads to a mistake, then an accident and then something more monstrous.
When I received this book from the publisher, the press release included a few paragraphs from Dianne Touchell on her inspiration for ‘A Small Madness’. She said that while living in the United States a few years ago she was “moved and disturbed” by news coverage of a particularly awful discovery, and it had stayed with her ever since. Touchell said that while “society gathered their metaphoric torches and pitchforks,” for this couple who had done a very bad thing, her heart just broke for them. It was that news story that lead to Touchell exploring similar themes in ‘A Small Madness’, particularly this idea that; “being damaged is very, very different to being evil.”
I adore Touchell’s writing. I fell in love with ‘Creepy & Maud’, and ‘A Small Madness’ has gone and broken my heart again. It’s not an easy book because I don’t think Touchell has it in her to write an ‘easy’ book – it’s sad and bleak in parts, the characters read a bit like careening cars you know are going to crash but you can’t take your eyes off of … the writing is lyrical;
He recognised the madness within himself that Sunday. Recognised its little tap dance on his heart and on his tongue. But he couldn’t let it loose again.
And these characters, for all their bad deeds and mistakes, are portrayed so tenderly and with a fragility that almost belies their actions. But that’s the whole point of the book – it’s to stay with Michael and Rose from the beginning of their madness, following what leads to their actions … Touchell unravels them masterfully. The book is told in third-person, so on one page we at once get Rose’s mindset on their situation;
Rose was learning about viruses in Biology. Virus: a submicroscopic particle of a nucleic acid surrounded by protein that can only replicate within a host cell. They only function inside the cells of another living thing. A virus is a parasite. Viruses are not considered to be independent living things. And they can be flushed out.
… and then we’re also given insight into Michael’s similar hard place;
‘We should tell someone.’ Even as Michael said it he wasn’t sure he believed it. Telling someone else, anyone else, would be an extension of the shame and he was stretched to capacity as it was.
His parents had always been there for him. They loved him. He didn’t doubt that. But isn’t love based on belief? And isn’t belief just expectations all dressed up for opening night? This was his last year of school; the opening night of the rest of his life was only months away. His mum and dad had bought and paid for their expectations. What happens when someone loses that? What happens when someone stops believing in you?
This is a book full of black, white and grey. Touchell asks readers to be sympathetic to a dark deed and the fallible characters who commit it – she asks that we examine this idea that “being damaged is very, very different to being evil.” Here is a deliciously disturbing book; dark, lyrical and with a sharp complexity that will push readers out of their comfort zone. Must read.
I’m sort of going to tell you what this book’s about. It’s not really clear from the blurb or cover … but I don’t know how to praise it without telling you a little bit.
Rose and Michael started dating, “almost by accident,” but when we first meet them they’re having sex for the first time because they’re in love and ready. Afterwards Rose can’t believe that nobody can tell how changed she is, now suddenly a woman. Michael wants to know when they can do it again.
And then Rose starts watching the calendar; “she was watching the calendar the way you watch a spider in the corner of a room you can’t leave. Each day that passed was a spider leg twitching …”
This is a book about Michael and Rose’s journey down a winding road they can’t seem to find their way back from. It’s about how one small madness leads to a mistake, then an accident and then something more monstrous.
When I received this book from the publisher, the press release included a few paragraphs from Dianne Touchell on her inspiration for ‘A Small Madness’. She said that while living in the United States a few years ago she was “moved and disturbed” by news coverage of a particularly awful discovery, and it had stayed with her ever since. Touchell said that while “society gathered their metaphoric torches and pitchforks,” for this couple who had done a very bad thing, her heart just broke for them. It was that news story that lead to Touchell exploring similar themes in ‘A Small Madness’, particularly this idea that; “being damaged is very, very different to being evil.”
I adore Touchell’s writing. I fell in love with ‘Creepy & Maud’, and ‘A Small Madness’ has gone and broken my heart again. It’s not an easy book because I don’t think Touchell has it in her to write an ‘easy’ book – it’s sad and bleak in parts, the characters read a bit like careening cars you know are going to crash but you can’t take your eyes off of … the writing is lyrical;
He recognised the madness within himself that Sunday. Recognised its little tap dance on his heart and on his tongue. But he couldn’t let it loose again.
And these characters, for all their bad deeds and mistakes, are portrayed so tenderly and with a fragility that almost belies their actions. But that’s the whole point of the book – it’s to stay with Michael and Rose from the beginning of their madness, following what leads to their actions … Touchell unravels them masterfully. The book is told in third-person, so on one page we at once get Rose’s mindset on their situation;
Rose was learning about viruses in Biology. Virus: a submicroscopic particle of a nucleic acid surrounded by protein that can only replicate within a host cell. They only function inside the cells of another living thing. A virus is a parasite. Viruses are not considered to be independent living things. And they can be flushed out.
… and then we’re also given insight into Michael’s similar hard place;
‘We should tell someone.’ Even as Michael said it he wasn’t sure he believed it. Telling someone else, anyone else, would be an extension of the shame and he was stretched to capacity as it was.
His parents had always been there for him. They loved him. He didn’t doubt that. But isn’t love based on belief? And isn’t belief just expectations all dressed up for opening night? This was his last year of school; the opening night of the rest of his life was only months away. His mum and dad had bought and paid for their expectations. What happens when someone loses that? What happens when someone stops believing in you?
This is a book full of black, white and grey. Touchell asks readers to be sympathetic to a dark deed and the fallible characters who commit it – she asks that we examine this idea that “being damaged is very, very different to being evil.” Here is a deliciously disturbing book; dark, lyrical and with a sharp complexity that will push readers out of their comfort zone. Must read.
February 8, 2015
" The heat was over, along with summer. They walked the dunes in a flush of new shyness, talking of the beginning of their last year of high school."
Rose and Michael have just had sex for the first time, they are in love and shyly thrilled with their new intimacy. In the heat of the moment they forgot to use a condom, just twice, but as each others first, Michael's older brother assures him, at least they don't have to worry about disease.
Two months later, Rose counts the days in her student diary - her period is 61 days late and a pregnancy test, obtained by her best friend Liz, shows two bold pink lines.
"'I've worked it out. We won't tell anyone. No one could help us anyway. I can hide it. It's not real....These things go away all the time.'"
With compassionate insight, Australian author Dianne Touchell explores Rose and Michael's responses to their unplanned pregnancy in A Small Madness. Ill-equipped to deal with the reality of their situation, Rose and Michael take refuge in denial that only grows deeper as time passes, leading to horrendous consequences.
Rose and Michael are 'good kids' from middle class families who regularly attend church, gets good grades and have plans for their future. I can't profess to understand their behaviour, but I feel that Touchell communicated her characters rationalisations well and my sympathy was stirred for both characters despite their egregious mistakes.
"She was a good person. And she was as genuinely appalled as everyone else by speculative descriptions of the monster who must have done this dreadful thing in the bush. Because it wasn't her."
The premise of A Touch of Madness may seem far fetched to some, but it was inspired by an American case reported in the media. I was curious to know just how common Rose's denial of her pregnancy is. I was quite stunned to learn that it happens in about 1 in 2,500 cases, and less than half the instances involve teenagers.
An emotionally powerful and provocative cautionary tale for both young adults and their parents, A Small Madness is beautifully written examination of a complex issue.
November 30, 2015
Opens: He’d eaten an orange.
My Thoughts: I finished A SMALL MADNESS by Dianne Touchell a few days ago and have been mulling over my review ever since. I worry that I am not going to do it the justice it deserves, so in a nutshell – WOW, fabulous, thought provoking, confronting, heartbreaking, unputdownable, all in all an absolutely amazing story about teen pregnancy, family relationships and mental issues. I have already earmarked as one of my top reads for this year, if not the top one!! So those few words that I jotted down while reading should cover my thoughts if the review doesn’t do it justice!
A SMALL MADNESS opens as Rose and Michael have sex for the first time – they are in their last year of High School, in love and ready to go to that next level after dating for a while. Afterwards, Rose can’t believe that no-one can tell that she has become a woman; that she has gone all the way. They didn’t use protection – even though both of them were prepared – but hey, no-one gets pregnant the first time! Well she does, and this is where the bubble bursts and the madness starts as she is ill-equipped mentally to deal with the reality of her situation. A SMALL MADNESS is told in the third person of the main characters so you get to see why they do the things they do. Rose decides that the pregnancy isn’t happening – that she has a virus. She is learning about viruses in Biology and viruses can be destroyed and go away. This sets her on the winding road downhill to madness as she decides if she ignores the reality and treats the situation as a virus, it will all go away and everything will be ok. As she is not pregnant she doesn’t need help.
…I've worked it out. We won't tell anyone. No one could help us anyway. I can hide it. It's not real....These things go away all the time…
This denial of pregnancy is not as implausible as it sounds. In fact the idea for the plot came from a newspaper article that author Dianne Touchell read while in the USA – in an promotional interview she said “society gathered their metaphoric torches and pitchforks,” and assassinated the characters of the young couple in the centre of the uproar; her heart went out to the couple. A quick google on the subject of denial of pregnancy produces stats which indicate that denial of a pregnancy at 20 weeks' gestation or later occurs in one in 475 pregnancies. That is a lot, and they are not all teenagers, and they are certainly not bad women, they are women who need help so desperately, but don’t recognise that they do.
…She was a good person. And she was as genuinely appalled as everyone else by speculative descriptions of the monster who must have done this dreadful thing in the bush. Because it wasn't her…
A SMALL MADNESS is not an easy book to read, but it is not heavy reading, if that makes sense. You know something bad is going to happen but it’s like being a rabbit in car headlights you can’t take your eyes off the pages. Rose and Michael are likable characters – despite what they did. They are emotionally fragile, rather than evil, and all I felt was sympathy and concern. The open ending worked for me because they are both starting out and once they have gotten over this huge bump in the road they will go on with their lives. The reader is gently brought to the realisation that life isn’t black or white – quite often there is grey – and with the grey must come compassion. Although confronting, full of drama and angst, and not sugar-coated in any way, I cannot recommend this book more highly.
With thanks to Allen & Unwin and the author for this copy to read and review.
June 21, 2015
2.5 stars
The first thing I thought a couple of chapters in was 'seriously have these kids been living under a rock!?' Most kids of my generation and younger have safe sex drilled into them from a fairly young age. It just did not convince me. I'd maybe understand the events if the characters came from a strict religious background - and they do go to church - but they are by no means strict about it - I mean they swear and have sex so I didn't find the weekly church going very plausible. In fact I didn't find much of the book or characters very plausible at all. I thought the characters were poorly developed from the start - I mean I felt like I didn't really know the characters before the action started and they felt very one dimensional. Secondly none of the characters were very likeable - except maybe Liv - and I also found some of the dialogue quite contrived. So no I didn't really enjoy this book. I feel harsh saying that, but it just seemed floored to me. I originally thought it was going to be about mental illness/depression and I suppose it is to an extent but not in the way I had expected.
Despite this though, I'm sure younger readers will be less critical of the writing than me and still be drawn in by this book and it's dark subject.
The first thing I thought a couple of chapters in was 'seriously have these kids been living under a rock!?' Most kids of my generation and younger have safe sex drilled into them from a fairly young age. It just did not convince me. I'd maybe understand the events if the characters came from a strict religious background - and they do go to church - but they are by no means strict about it - I mean they swear and have sex so I didn't find the weekly church going very plausible. In fact I didn't find much of the book or characters very plausible at all. I thought the characters were poorly developed from the start - I mean I felt like I didn't really know the characters before the action started and they felt very one dimensional. Secondly none of the characters were very likeable - except maybe Liv - and I also found some of the dialogue quite contrived. So no I didn't really enjoy this book. I feel harsh saying that, but it just seemed floored to me. I originally thought it was going to be about mental illness/depression and I suppose it is to an extent but not in the way I had expected.
Despite this though, I'm sure younger readers will be less critical of the writing than me and still be drawn in by this book and it's dark subject.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
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February 20, 2015http://www.divabooknerd.com/2015/02/a...
Please note, this review contains spoilers. It's a sensitive subject, so please read at your own peril. I have chosen not to rate A Small Madness, due to the emotional content and how this book effected me personally.
Please note, this review contains spoilers. It's a sensitive subject, so please read at your own peril. I have chosen not to rate A Small Madness, due to the emotional content and how this book effected me personally.
February 27, 2015
A Small Madness, Dianne Touchell’s profoundly honest novel about a teenage girl and boy struggling to conceal pregnancy, targets young adults while reminding older readers of their own unwanted pregnancies.
As I read it, so much of what she writes taps into my own experience of being pregnant at fifteen, as it does the final lines in ‘Honesty’, the first poem in A Circle in a Room Full of Squares (2003), a collection of students’ poetry, short stories, art and photography that I collated and edited. The girl, writing about her school life, what it’s like to speak her truth, ends her poem with, ‘Life is not about honesty. It’s learning how to lie.’
Touchell can never be accused of this. She writes with deep compassion and stark insights, presenting us with two beautiful teenagers raised with Christian ethics, both respected amongst their peers, both committed to doing well at school, both with big dreams for the future.
Reminiscent of teenagers I know, they fall in love, the end result being tragic. Fearing the consequences of the pregnancy being discovered, they both hide the truth, both do all they can to spare, not only their parents’ shame and embarrassment, but also their own.
No doubt, the gatekeepers of ignorance, those who’d prefer teenagers to read paternalistic claptrap designed to soften truths about growing up, protecting teenage sensitivities with simplistic, distanced, happy-ever-after stories, will reel in horror when reading A Small Madness.
The conclusion leaves readers to contemplate what might happen to these two beautiful characters, as they also pause to think about parents and a society that frowns upon teenage pregnancy, frowns upon such young people who love one another because they believe young, real love is not possible.
I only wish a young woman I knew had read this in her teenage years. Also raised within a Christian family, she was forced to abort her child to prevent family shame. She saw herself as a murderer, suffered dearly and, tragically. She was murdered in her early twenties by two of West Australia’s most notorious serial killers.
Reading A Small Madness, may well have saved her.
As I read it, so much of what she writes taps into my own experience of being pregnant at fifteen, as it does the final lines in ‘Honesty’, the first poem in A Circle in a Room Full of Squares (2003), a collection of students’ poetry, short stories, art and photography that I collated and edited. The girl, writing about her school life, what it’s like to speak her truth, ends her poem with, ‘Life is not about honesty. It’s learning how to lie.’
Touchell can never be accused of this. She writes with deep compassion and stark insights, presenting us with two beautiful teenagers raised with Christian ethics, both respected amongst their peers, both committed to doing well at school, both with big dreams for the future.
Reminiscent of teenagers I know, they fall in love, the end result being tragic. Fearing the consequences of the pregnancy being discovered, they both hide the truth, both do all they can to spare, not only their parents’ shame and embarrassment, but also their own.
No doubt, the gatekeepers of ignorance, those who’d prefer teenagers to read paternalistic claptrap designed to soften truths about growing up, protecting teenage sensitivities with simplistic, distanced, happy-ever-after stories, will reel in horror when reading A Small Madness.
The conclusion leaves readers to contemplate what might happen to these two beautiful characters, as they also pause to think about parents and a society that frowns upon teenage pregnancy, frowns upon such young people who love one another because they believe young, real love is not possible.
I only wish a young woman I knew had read this in her teenage years. Also raised within a Christian family, she was forced to abort her child to prevent family shame. She saw herself as a murderer, suffered dearly and, tragically. She was murdered in her early twenties by two of West Australia’s most notorious serial killers.
Reading A Small Madness, may well have saved her.
January 2, 2016
This was a strange, surreal, bizarre, fucked up kind of novel. Having said that, I think it wavers between a 3 and a 4 for me on the old star rating chart.
I can't exactly decide how to feel about it. It was like falling into this dark, twisted hole and not being about to get out again. Full credit to the writing -- you can definitely feel the mounting pressure and panic and all of it.
Very strange. Very scary. Brilliant writing in parts, though.
I can't exactly decide how to feel about it. It was like falling into this dark, twisted hole and not being about to get out again. Full credit to the writing -- you can definitely feel the mounting pressure and panic and all of it.
Very strange. Very scary. Brilliant writing in parts, though.
February 17, 2015
I received A Small Madness by Dianne Touchell from Allen and Unwin in exchange for a review. This has in no way influenced my thoughts and feelings about the book.
As soon as I saw A Small Madness, in the Allen and Unwin catalogue quite a couple of months ago, I knew I needed this book in my hands and boy I wasn’t disappointed.
The synopsis of A Small Madness doesn’t give too much away, but it gives the reader just enough so they are pulled right in.
I cannot explain how heartbreaking, enriching and beautiful this novel is. The way that A Small Madness is written is very unique. Rose the protagonist of A Small Madness is quite young, and you can hear it, in her voice. Normally I don’t like that in a young adult novel, but it just adds so much complexity and makes an impact like no other.
I try not to spoil books in my reviews, but with this book it’s really hard, I’m not spoiling the whole book so don’t get worried, I’m just giving away something to me, is common sense.
So Rose is going through a teenage pregnancy, but not in the archetypal way. Rose just doesn’t want to believe it, no matter, what and that is what makes the novel that much more emotional.
A Small Madness really captures the emotions of a pregnant teenager. It’s heartbreaking really. It really challenges the beliefs of the reader and how they perceive teenage pregnancy.
Michael, Roses boyfriend, friend, companion and father of her child, is very similar to Rose. They are both so ‘innocent’ and new to everything. But their love is simply beautiful and intimate. That even through hardship, they still love each other. It’s incredible because sometimes most adults can’t do that.
The title really does tell what is going on in Rose’s mind; a small madness. Rose just isn’t dealing with the pregnancy well, she is like a ticking time bomb. It’s eating her up and throughout the novel, we see her change and it’s heartbreaking. Her thoughts and feelings are turned and sometimes not for the better.
A Small Madness is very antagonizing. Let me tell you that right now. But it’s also a beautiful, powerful novel that challenges the reader, and it will bring you out of your comfort zone.
Furthermore, Touchell’s writing is incredible that just brings out all the emotions in the reader. But that is what makes the story that much more distressing and moving. Touchell also questions the reader. However, A Small Madness may be very confronting to some readers.
She asks the reader to be sympathetic to a dark deed and the flawed characters that committed it. She asks the readers to really question the idea that ‘being damaged is very, different to being evil’ – especially to be of that age.
A Small Madness is a beautiful, important novel that will challenge your beliefs and break your heart.
As soon as I saw A Small Madness, in the Allen and Unwin catalogue quite a couple of months ago, I knew I needed this book in my hands and boy I wasn’t disappointed.
The synopsis of A Small Madness doesn’t give too much away, but it gives the reader just enough so they are pulled right in.
I cannot explain how heartbreaking, enriching and beautiful this novel is. The way that A Small Madness is written is very unique. Rose the protagonist of A Small Madness is quite young, and you can hear it, in her voice. Normally I don’t like that in a young adult novel, but it just adds so much complexity and makes an impact like no other.
I try not to spoil books in my reviews, but with this book it’s really hard, I’m not spoiling the whole book so don’t get worried, I’m just giving away something to me, is common sense.
So Rose is going through a teenage pregnancy, but not in the archetypal way. Rose just doesn’t want to believe it, no matter, what and that is what makes the novel that much more emotional.
A Small Madness really captures the emotions of a pregnant teenager. It’s heartbreaking really. It really challenges the beliefs of the reader and how they perceive teenage pregnancy.
Michael, Roses boyfriend, friend, companion and father of her child, is very similar to Rose. They are both so ‘innocent’ and new to everything. But their love is simply beautiful and intimate. That even through hardship, they still love each other. It’s incredible because sometimes most adults can’t do that.
The title really does tell what is going on in Rose’s mind; a small madness. Rose just isn’t dealing with the pregnancy well, she is like a ticking time bomb. It’s eating her up and throughout the novel, we see her change and it’s heartbreaking. Her thoughts and feelings are turned and sometimes not for the better.
A Small Madness is very antagonizing. Let me tell you that right now. But it’s also a beautiful, powerful novel that challenges the reader, and it will bring you out of your comfort zone.
Furthermore, Touchell’s writing is incredible that just brings out all the emotions in the reader. But that is what makes the story that much more distressing and moving. Touchell also questions the reader. However, A Small Madness may be very confronting to some readers.
She asks the reader to be sympathetic to a dark deed and the flawed characters that committed it. She asks the readers to really question the idea that ‘being damaged is very, different to being evil’ – especially to be of that age.
A Small Madness is a beautiful, important novel that will challenge your beliefs and break your heart.
December 19, 2025
sagen wir so, das buch ist seinem titel treu geblieben
November 11, 2015
A Small Madness by Dianne Touchell begins with a fresh beginning for Rose, a teenager in her last year of high school. A new sexual experience has her feeling like a woman and she looks over herself to see how much she's changed because of it. She and her boyfriend Michael have each made plans for their own future. Her intentions are to become an actress and he is looking to become a doctor. So, when she's pregnant, she doesn't want her life to change and she refuses to believe any of the evidence. However, people around her start noticing the changes. They notice that she's not looking well, that her personality and behaviour has changed. The same can be said of Michael. Though he doesn't experience the physical changes, he becomes worried for her and finds that he has a new outlook towards his whole life. For Rose, she realises that she needs to make some choices about this pregnancy. Just a warning for some of you: it's not a happy book and a lot of people might find the content to be kind of disturbing. There is bad language and sexual references as well, just to let you know.
Though I didn't necessarily like all the characters, I felt that they were all somewhat understandable. The way the book is written, you can see the motives of all the people, their feelings about each situation and many of the choices they make. I think I liked Liv the most. Though she was treated somewhat poorly in the book, I think that her motives were the most clear and natural. I think the most interesting perspective was to read about how the parents were dealing with the situation. Though they didn't know the particulars of what was wrong with their children, it was certainly good to read about the way they tried to deal with each problem- what they thought might be wrong.
As for the plot, I think it was fairly interesting. The topic of teen pregnancy has so many aspects to it and the author could have gone in any direction. But, I think the way they went seemed suitable. The book had a strong structure and many of the peaks happen at important points of the pregnancy; the first missed period, the first biological changes, and other such things. Obviously it's not going to be an action packed novel, but there is still a lot of drama. Most of that revolves around the emotionality of the characters, arguments and the like. I felt like the book could have been longer, with more portions explained further; in some points it just seemed like bits were rushed through. For example, we didn't see much of how the pregnancy changed her school and drama work in a lot of portions. The same for Michael; though he experiences a lot of emotional trauma, there are a lot of bits in his life that we miss out on. There are background characters, who ought to be important, that kind of get lost. For example, Rose's father. It's understandable that he's not around much, but I kind of wish that he had more of a part to play.
Overall, I think it was a fairly good book. It explored a lot of interesting points about teenage pregnancy and how it changed people. The characters are interesting and the author got through many months of the book in an interesting manner, with little back stories and things that made each character quite unique. However, the long time span in a short amount of words didn't necessarily work the whole time; many portions could have been explained more. It was a pretty good read and, though it was somewhat sad, I think it's the type of book that really makes you think.
I was asked to do a review of the book for a family friend and was loaned a copy.
Though I didn't necessarily like all the characters, I felt that they were all somewhat understandable. The way the book is written, you can see the motives of all the people, their feelings about each situation and many of the choices they make. I think I liked Liv the most. Though she was treated somewhat poorly in the book, I think that her motives were the most clear and natural. I think the most interesting perspective was to read about how the parents were dealing with the situation. Though they didn't know the particulars of what was wrong with their children, it was certainly good to read about the way they tried to deal with each problem- what they thought might be wrong.
As for the plot, I think it was fairly interesting. The topic of teen pregnancy has so many aspects to it and the author could have gone in any direction. But, I think the way they went seemed suitable. The book had a strong structure and many of the peaks happen at important points of the pregnancy; the first missed period, the first biological changes, and other such things. Obviously it's not going to be an action packed novel, but there is still a lot of drama. Most of that revolves around the emotionality of the characters, arguments and the like. I felt like the book could have been longer, with more portions explained further; in some points it just seemed like bits were rushed through. For example, we didn't see much of how the pregnancy changed her school and drama work in a lot of portions. The same for Michael; though he experiences a lot of emotional trauma, there are a lot of bits in his life that we miss out on. There are background characters, who ought to be important, that kind of get lost. For example, Rose's father. It's understandable that he's not around much, but I kind of wish that he had more of a part to play.
Overall, I think it was a fairly good book. It explored a lot of interesting points about teenage pregnancy and how it changed people. The characters are interesting and the author got through many months of the book in an interesting manner, with little back stories and things that made each character quite unique. However, the long time span in a short amount of words didn't necessarily work the whole time; many portions could have been explained more. It was a pretty good read and, though it was somewhat sad, I think it's the type of book that really makes you think.
I was asked to do a review of the book for a family friend and was loaned a copy.
March 8, 2015
My head hurts so badly right now. It's expected since it was ONLY TWISTED TO EPIC PROPORTIONS.
There just aren't words for what this book made me go through. Thank goodness for that, actually.
A Small Madness tells the story of a girl named Rose. I will warn you, that if you are really uncomfortable with the topic of teen pregnancy or particularly, sex, in books then I'm telling you now that you will not be comfortable with this book. This is a raw, gritty portrayal of teen pregnancy and the author doesn't gloss over anything.
But that's one of the reasons why this book really touched me.
We see how the way that the main character, Rose, is forced to deal with her pregnancy and how it transforms her. The things she does. I can't even. It's so heartbreaking and really does bring up themes that really aren't dealt with enough in YA.
There are many reasons which drew me to this book. The initial being the both the topic and the writing style. I've never read anything before on teen pregnancy and I was pretty curious. Also, from the synopsis I could tell I would like the writing style (I love books written with that kind of detached but yet very intimate and descriptive style). I also love reading books by Aussie authors and the cover is stunning. And totally suits the tone and mood of the book. And this is weird, but it actually feels really nice.
So when I completely (unexpectedly) got this in the mail for review I completely freaked. And I may have ditched the book I was reading in favour of A Small Madness. I know. Terrible. I had just really, really looking forward to reading this ever since I first heard about this, ok? So I sat down and read, starting it late on a school night (with not much time left after homework before I actually had to go to bed) and finishing it within half an hour the next morning. I was just so, so into the story and needed to know what was going to happen.
I also read with my mouth gaping open for a short while. True story.
I just had this feeling of complete and total dread as to what was going to happen (which was thanks to the author's brilliant writing) and knew that I wasn't going to be completely with it until I knew what was going to happen to the characters.
Although I was not a fan of the ending. It was a little too open for my liking. I just think that while open endings can work, in realistic fiction it is particularly important to wrap-up the story and preferably provide closure.
If all Dianne Touchell's books are like this, then I really need to look into reading them.
4/5 comets
There just aren't words for what this book made me go through. Thank goodness for that, actually.
A Small Madness tells the story of a girl named Rose. I will warn you, that if you are really uncomfortable with the topic of teen pregnancy or particularly, sex, in books then I'm telling you now that you will not be comfortable with this book. This is a raw, gritty portrayal of teen pregnancy and the author doesn't gloss over anything.
But that's one of the reasons why this book really touched me.
We see how the way that the main character, Rose, is forced to deal with her pregnancy and how it transforms her. The things she does. I can't even. It's so heartbreaking and really does bring up themes that really aren't dealt with enough in YA.
There are many reasons which drew me to this book. The initial being the both the topic and the writing style. I've never read anything before on teen pregnancy and I was pretty curious. Also, from the synopsis I could tell I would like the writing style (I love books written with that kind of detached but yet very intimate and descriptive style). I also love reading books by Aussie authors and the cover is stunning. And totally suits the tone and mood of the book. And this is weird, but it actually feels really nice.
So when I completely (unexpectedly) got this in the mail for review I completely freaked. And I may have ditched the book I was reading in favour of A Small Madness. I know. Terrible. I had just really, really looking forward to reading this ever since I first heard about this, ok? So I sat down and read, starting it late on a school night (with not much time left after homework before I actually had to go to bed) and finishing it within half an hour the next morning. I was just so, so into the story and needed to know what was going to happen.
I also read with my mouth gaping open for a short while. True story.
I just had this feeling of complete and total dread as to what was going to happen (which was thanks to the author's brilliant writing) and knew that I wasn't going to be completely with it until I knew what was going to happen to the characters.
Although I was not a fan of the ending. It was a little too open for my liking. I just think that while open endings can work, in realistic fiction it is particularly important to wrap-up the story and preferably provide closure.
If all Dianne Touchell's books are like this, then I really need to look into reading them.
4/5 comets
September 19, 2016
Inhalt: Rose liebt Michael. Und Michael liebt Rose. Sie haben zum ersten Mal Sex. Schüchtern und liebevoll. Dass sie keine Kondom benutzen, ist nicht so schlimm. Schließlich ist es für beide das erste Mal, da kann ja nicht viel passieren. Zwei Monate später zählt Rose die Tage: 61 seit ihrer letzten Periode und der Schwangerschaftstest ist eindeutig positiv. Was werden ihre Eltern, was werden die Leute sagen? Das kann nicht sein und das darf nicht sein. Rose verdrängt, dass sie schwanger ist. Und Michael verdrängt, dass Rose schwanger ist. Und das Unheil nimmt seinen Lauf … (Quelle: Verlag)
Meine Meinung: Zwischen zwei Fenstern war das erste Buch, das ich von der Autorin Dianne Touchell gelesen habe, und es hat mich sehr beeindruckt. Sie hat das große Glück, Emotionen übermitteln zu können, indem sie Wörter auf Papier bringt und diese Emotionen übertragen sich beim Lesen wie von Zauberhand auf den Leser. So war es auch bei Kleiner Wahn wieder. Anfangs hatte ich Bedenken, dass dieses Werk blass hinter Zwischen zwei Fenstern zurückbleibt aber es konnte definitiv mithalten.
Auch hier schockt das Thema wieder. Rose ist schwanger und sie möchte es nicht wahrhaben, verdrängt es, fällt in eine Art Wahn und will sich von niemandem helfen lassen. Ein Thema, das sicher vielen von uns völlig fremd ist und eigentlich schwer nachvollziehbar sein sollte. Aber das war es nicht. Beim Lesen fühlte ich die gleiche Verzweiflung, wie Roses Mitmenschen, ich bin eingedrungen in Roses Gedanken und in die ganze Situation von Rose und Michael und obwohl mir das mehr als einmal das Herz gebrochen hat, war ihre Geschichte wunderschön und voller Hoffnung.
Obwohl Dianne Touchell sehr poetisch und in wundervollen Tönen schreibt, so darf man nie vergessen, welche schlimmen und erschreckenden Themen sie doch anspricht. Diesen krassen Gegensatz finde ich immer wunderschön und er berührt mich sehr, doch ich kann nicht behaupten, dass ich das Thema des Buches leicht verdauen kann. Das ist ein Punkt, den man jederzeit bedenken sollte, wenn man zu Werken von Dianne Touchell greifen möchte.
Fazit: Dianne Touchells Kleiner Wahn ist ein Werk der Schönheit. Und somit ein Glück für immer, um es mit Ruta Sepetys Worten auszudrücken. Das poetisch geschriebene Werk ist ein kleines Gesamtkunstwerk und das Thema, welches dahinter steckt, umso erschreckender. Beim Lesen saugt man die Gefühle, die das Buch vermittelt direkt in sich auf und durchlebt mit Rose und Michael die Handlung. Fühlt das, was sie fühlen. Leichte Gemüter sollten hier aufpassen aber für mich ist und bleibt es ein Gesamtkunstwerk.
Vielen herzlichen Dank an den Carlsen Verlag für das Buch zur *Blogtour.
Meine Meinung: Zwischen zwei Fenstern war das erste Buch, das ich von der Autorin Dianne Touchell gelesen habe, und es hat mich sehr beeindruckt. Sie hat das große Glück, Emotionen übermitteln zu können, indem sie Wörter auf Papier bringt und diese Emotionen übertragen sich beim Lesen wie von Zauberhand auf den Leser. So war es auch bei Kleiner Wahn wieder. Anfangs hatte ich Bedenken, dass dieses Werk blass hinter Zwischen zwei Fenstern zurückbleibt aber es konnte definitiv mithalten.
Auch hier schockt das Thema wieder. Rose ist schwanger und sie möchte es nicht wahrhaben, verdrängt es, fällt in eine Art Wahn und will sich von niemandem helfen lassen. Ein Thema, das sicher vielen von uns völlig fremd ist und eigentlich schwer nachvollziehbar sein sollte. Aber das war es nicht. Beim Lesen fühlte ich die gleiche Verzweiflung, wie Roses Mitmenschen, ich bin eingedrungen in Roses Gedanken und in die ganze Situation von Rose und Michael und obwohl mir das mehr als einmal das Herz gebrochen hat, war ihre Geschichte wunderschön und voller Hoffnung.
Obwohl Dianne Touchell sehr poetisch und in wundervollen Tönen schreibt, so darf man nie vergessen, welche schlimmen und erschreckenden Themen sie doch anspricht. Diesen krassen Gegensatz finde ich immer wunderschön und er berührt mich sehr, doch ich kann nicht behaupten, dass ich das Thema des Buches leicht verdauen kann. Das ist ein Punkt, den man jederzeit bedenken sollte, wenn man zu Werken von Dianne Touchell greifen möchte.
Fazit: Dianne Touchells Kleiner Wahn ist ein Werk der Schönheit. Und somit ein Glück für immer, um es mit Ruta Sepetys Worten auszudrücken. Das poetisch geschriebene Werk ist ein kleines Gesamtkunstwerk und das Thema, welches dahinter steckt, umso erschreckender. Beim Lesen saugt man die Gefühle, die das Buch vermittelt direkt in sich auf und durchlebt mit Rose und Michael die Handlung. Fühlt das, was sie fühlen. Leichte Gemüter sollten hier aufpassen aber für mich ist und bleibt es ein Gesamtkunstwerk.
Vielen herzlichen Dank an den Carlsen Verlag für das Buch zur *Blogtour.
February 13, 2016
As happens to many teenagers, seniors Rose and Michael fall in love and have unprotected sex a couple of times. But when she becomes pregnant, Rose refuses to believe the evidence right before her eyes. Heavily in denial, she avoids her best friend Liv, the only person other than Michael who knows the truth, and tries to spontaneously abort the fetus. At some points, she even claims to have a virus that she must get rid of and even attempts to starve her unborn child. Although both teens have plans for the future--Rose is considering an acting career, and Michael wants to focus on medicine--they seem clueless about what to do about this situation, and let time just move on with nothing being resolved. While Rose isolates herself from others and deludes herself, Michael begins falling apart in many ways, ditching school, arguing with his father, and uncertain about what to do. When Rose finally gives birth, they bury the baby nearby. Not surprisingly, the body is discovered by dogs, and the two are hauled in for questioning by the police. The author does a marvelous job of thrusting readers into the lives of two teens who are typical in so many ways and yet who act so irresponsibly. While it might seem that they could have shared their concerns with family and friends, neither did until it was too late. Clearly, it was almost as though if they pretended that everything was okay, it would turn out that way. Even Michael's helplessness and willingness to go along with Rose's plans to do nothing make sense within the book's context. Inspired by actual events, the story raises many questions about how we manage to delude ourselves and avoid the consequences of our actions. Published in Canada, the book should be required reading for middle graders and high school students who may see parts of themselves in the main characters. Not only does it deal with a hidden pregnancy, but it challenges many of the assumptions readers may make about pregnant teens and girls who are sexually active. Even "bike," the denigrating term used for Liv, Rose's friend, is troublesome.
February 9, 2015
I got this ARC from FirstReads
Rating: 3.5 stars
Basically, A Small Madness is about a girl that gets pregnant and loads of implications occur as a result.
When reading this book, there were many times where I just had to stop and think over the events happening. This was darker than books I normally read. Nevertheless, it was still good.
What I liked:
Characters
Writing style
Plot
What I didn't like:
POV placement
In summary, this dark book provides a literal look at teen pregnancy and the consequences of it.
Rating: 3.5 stars
Basically, A Small Madness is about a girl that gets pregnant and loads of implications occur as a result.
When reading this book, there were many times where I just had to stop and think over the events happening. This was darker than books I normally read. Nevertheless, it was still good.
What I liked:
Characters
The characters were REAL PEOPLE. They were far from perfect and I could relate to how they felt in certain situations. Best of all, their relationships felt very real .
Each of their personailties shine through by themselves. I understood them as people and what motivated them to do specific things.
Writing style
I have to commend the author on the subtlety of her writing because she shows instead of tells. She writes in a unique way that is to the point without being boring or going overboard with the use of adjectives.
Plot
It's kinda hard to discuss the plot without giving away important details about it. I was surprised at how interested I was since teen pregnancy isn't something I actively look for to read about. I'm glad I got to read this book because the author took me on a really different journey and told a story of a topic I'm not very knowledgable about.
What I didn't like:
POV placement
The change of POV within single chapters really irks me. It isn't THAT bad but I could really do without it.
In summary, this dark book provides a literal look at teen pregnancy and the consequences of it.
September 9, 2016
There are many things to admire about this excellent novel — A Small Madness. Firstly, the fact, that it’s not only suitable for young adults, but for older readers as well. For me, a significant amount of the success of this powerful yet sensitively told story is Dianne Touchell's prose, or turn of phrase. She manages to deftly strike a balance between writing prose which can be either, surprisingly light and witty or alternatively dark and contemplative—but always engaging. The story rings true. It’s a tribute to the author for bringing such difficult subject matter —teen pregnancy—to light, in an authentic and compassionate voice. A great read.
December 25, 2014
I received this book through Goodreads Giveaways.
I previously read Creepy and Maud, by the same author, and found it disappointing and lacking something. A Small Madness doesn't lack anything and draws the reader in straight away. I liked the characters because they felt real - real people in real situations. It’s refreshing for teen characters, and adult characters, to feel like real people. A Small Madness is incredibly well written and will keep readers enthralled right from the first sentence. I highly recommend this book.
I previously read Creepy and Maud, by the same author, and found it disappointing and lacking something. A Small Madness doesn't lack anything and draws the reader in straight away. I liked the characters because they felt real - real people in real situations. It’s refreshing for teen characters, and adult characters, to feel like real people. A Small Madness is incredibly well written and will keep readers enthralled right from the first sentence. I highly recommend this book.
February 18, 2015
This is a beautifully written story for young adults about the perils of unprotected sex and the dangers of keeping the truth hidden. Michael and Rose are both good children, but neither of them feel they have anyone to turn to when a pregnancy results from their first sexual experience. Told in alternating chapters by Michael and Rose this is a tragic story. Set in Melbourne, this would be a great book for discussion. Recommended.
April 12, 2015
Confronting, raw, unflinching look at an unplanned teenage pregnancy and its consequences. Very powerful and not afraid to make its characters unlikeable (but realistic) - there was something of a Friday Night Lights quality to it. Also an eloquent illustration of the danger in society's tendency to deny what we don't like/want to see.
ETA: recommended for those with a strong stomach and willing to read confronting material; a very 'adult' YA; not escapist
ETA: recommended for those with a strong stomach and willing to read confronting material; a very 'adult' YA; not escapist
January 12, 2015
Compelling YA fiction. A hidden pregnancy and the ramifications as everything unravels.
January 28, 2015
Review to come.
March 28, 2015
AMAZING. And horrifying.
July 18, 2015
A heartbreakingly complex issue but an important tale to tell. Must read
December 15, 2017
Obwohl man nach Lesen des Klappentextes schon weiß oder ahnt, um es was es in diesem kleinen, optisch so unscheinbaren, Königskind geht, ist man im Vorfeld auf gar keinen Fall darauf gefasst, wie tief der Eisberg im Inneren sein wird.
Ob man dies nun als Warnung betrachtet oder schlicht zur Kenntnis nimmt, bleibt jedem selbst überlassen. Mich hätte man im Vorfeld definitiv kurz warnen sollen, denn die Geschichte hat mich nicht nur komplett eingesogen, sondern unfassbar wütend gemacht.
Da sind Rose und Michael, beide stehen an der Grenze zwischen Teenager- und Erwachsensein. Beide mit einer recht engen Bindung zu den Eltern, die eine freiweillig, der andere, weil er so erzogen wurde. Beides sehr gute Schüler, mit herausragenden Zukunftsmöglichkeiten und trotzdem so naiv und unaufgeklärt, das ich hätte schreien wollen.
Rose und Michael sind schwer verliebt ineinander und als sie das erste Mal miteinander schlafen, da ist es nicht so schlimm, das sie vergessen ein Kondom zu benutzen. Was soll schon passieren ? Beim zweiten Mal, da benutzen sie auch keines. Und dann, 61 Tage später, da stellt Rose plötzlich fest, das sie schwanger ist. Und nun beginnt der eigentliche Wahn: Rose denkt, wenn sie es totschweigt, wenn sie beide, sie und Michael, einfach so tun, als sei nichts passiert, dann wird dieses Ding, dieses Virus in ihr, schon von alleine wieder weggehen.
Doch dieses Verheimlichen, das ihnen nach außen erstaunlich gut gelingt, hat schlimme Folgen und beide erleben eine absolute Wesensveränderung.
Rose beginnt sich auf ganzer Linie selbst zu schaden, Körperlich wie Psychisch. Sie lebt in ihrer selbst konstruierten Welt, gaukelt sich vor, das alles in bester Ordnung sei und befindet sich irgendwann in so einem extremen Wahn, das niemand mehr zu ihr durchdringt. Michael, der unter sehr strenger Hand des Vaters lebt, ist verzweifelt und diese Verzweiflung, die von Hilflosigkeit begleitet wird, die veranlasst ihn dazu, sich immer wieder und immer mehr gegen den Vater zu stellen.
Irgendwann erreichen beide einen Punkt, an dem es nicht mehr weitergeht und die Situation völlig aus dem Ruder läuft.
Dianne Touchell erzählt diese Geschichte eiskalt, aber in einem unglaublich poetischen und wunderschönen Ton. Sie wirft den Leser direkt mit dem ersten Satz ins Geschehen, hält sich nicht mit Nichtigkeiten oder einer langen Vorgeschichte auf, sondern geht direkt auf meine Gefühlswelt los und bringt diese ordentlich ins Straucheln. Mit jeder Seite die man liest, wird einem immer mehr bewusst auf welche Katastrophe Michael und Rose da eigentlich zusteuern und es hat mich so unfassbar wütend gemacht. Erst darauf, das die beiden so naiv sind, was irgendwann in Wut auf die Eltern umschwang, die ihre Kinder zwar gläubig, aber unaufgeklärt erzogen haben. Dann wechselte die Wut nur zu Rose, die sich etwas vormacht, die denkt, sie könne einfach so tun als ob. Diese Wut sprang dann wieder auf die Mutter über, zu der Rose ein unglaublich enges Verhältnis hat. Ich war so sauer auf sie, weil sie nur wahrnimmt was sie möchte, statt einfach mal GENAU hinzusehen. Permanent wollte ich beim Lesen irgendeine Person anschreien. Ob es nun Rose und Michael selbst waren, die Eltern, die Lehrer. Alle haben ihr Päckchen zur Katastrophe beigetragen, die am Ende des Buches auf einen wartet und die einen schockiert und auch ein bisschen hilflos macht.
Aufgrund der geballten Ladung Heftigkeit, die in diesem kleinen Büchlein steckt, war ich mehrmals versucht es, zumindest ganz kurz zum Durchatmen, beiseite zu legen. Es gelang mir nicht, denn Dianne Touchells Worte und ihre Eindringlichkeit wirken wie ein Sog, dem man sich nicht entziehen kann.
Der einzige Kritikpunkt den ich persönlich habe, ist das Ende, welches mir ein bisschen zu unfertig war. Irgendwie auch nicht. Es macht alles Sinn und es ist alles schlüssig und doch ist die Szene für mich irgendwie unrund. Ich habe meine Geschichten und besonders die Enden immer gerne so abgeschlossen, das ich nicht noch viel reininterpretieren und mich fragen muss, wie es für die ein oder andere Person weiterging. Das fand ich ein bisschen schade.
Ansonsten: Ganz klare Leseempfehlung meinerseits !
Ob man dies nun als Warnung betrachtet oder schlicht zur Kenntnis nimmt, bleibt jedem selbst überlassen. Mich hätte man im Vorfeld definitiv kurz warnen sollen, denn die Geschichte hat mich nicht nur komplett eingesogen, sondern unfassbar wütend gemacht.
Da sind Rose und Michael, beide stehen an der Grenze zwischen Teenager- und Erwachsensein. Beide mit einer recht engen Bindung zu den Eltern, die eine freiweillig, der andere, weil er so erzogen wurde. Beides sehr gute Schüler, mit herausragenden Zukunftsmöglichkeiten und trotzdem so naiv und unaufgeklärt, das ich hätte schreien wollen.
Rose und Michael sind schwer verliebt ineinander und als sie das erste Mal miteinander schlafen, da ist es nicht so schlimm, das sie vergessen ein Kondom zu benutzen. Was soll schon passieren ? Beim zweiten Mal, da benutzen sie auch keines. Und dann, 61 Tage später, da stellt Rose plötzlich fest, das sie schwanger ist. Und nun beginnt der eigentliche Wahn: Rose denkt, wenn sie es totschweigt, wenn sie beide, sie und Michael, einfach so tun, als sei nichts passiert, dann wird dieses Ding, dieses Virus in ihr, schon von alleine wieder weggehen.
Doch dieses Verheimlichen, das ihnen nach außen erstaunlich gut gelingt, hat schlimme Folgen und beide erleben eine absolute Wesensveränderung.
Rose beginnt sich auf ganzer Linie selbst zu schaden, Körperlich wie Psychisch. Sie lebt in ihrer selbst konstruierten Welt, gaukelt sich vor, das alles in bester Ordnung sei und befindet sich irgendwann in so einem extremen Wahn, das niemand mehr zu ihr durchdringt. Michael, der unter sehr strenger Hand des Vaters lebt, ist verzweifelt und diese Verzweiflung, die von Hilflosigkeit begleitet wird, die veranlasst ihn dazu, sich immer wieder und immer mehr gegen den Vater zu stellen.
Irgendwann erreichen beide einen Punkt, an dem es nicht mehr weitergeht und die Situation völlig aus dem Ruder läuft.
Dianne Touchell erzählt diese Geschichte eiskalt, aber in einem unglaublich poetischen und wunderschönen Ton. Sie wirft den Leser direkt mit dem ersten Satz ins Geschehen, hält sich nicht mit Nichtigkeiten oder einer langen Vorgeschichte auf, sondern geht direkt auf meine Gefühlswelt los und bringt diese ordentlich ins Straucheln. Mit jeder Seite die man liest, wird einem immer mehr bewusst auf welche Katastrophe Michael und Rose da eigentlich zusteuern und es hat mich so unfassbar wütend gemacht. Erst darauf, das die beiden so naiv sind, was irgendwann in Wut auf die Eltern umschwang, die ihre Kinder zwar gläubig, aber unaufgeklärt erzogen haben. Dann wechselte die Wut nur zu Rose, die sich etwas vormacht, die denkt, sie könne einfach so tun als ob. Diese Wut sprang dann wieder auf die Mutter über, zu der Rose ein unglaublich enges Verhältnis hat. Ich war so sauer auf sie, weil sie nur wahrnimmt was sie möchte, statt einfach mal GENAU hinzusehen. Permanent wollte ich beim Lesen irgendeine Person anschreien. Ob es nun Rose und Michael selbst waren, die Eltern, die Lehrer. Alle haben ihr Päckchen zur Katastrophe beigetragen, die am Ende des Buches auf einen wartet und die einen schockiert und auch ein bisschen hilflos macht.
Aufgrund der geballten Ladung Heftigkeit, die in diesem kleinen Büchlein steckt, war ich mehrmals versucht es, zumindest ganz kurz zum Durchatmen, beiseite zu legen. Es gelang mir nicht, denn Dianne Touchells Worte und ihre Eindringlichkeit wirken wie ein Sog, dem man sich nicht entziehen kann.
Der einzige Kritikpunkt den ich persönlich habe, ist das Ende, welches mir ein bisschen zu unfertig war. Irgendwie auch nicht. Es macht alles Sinn und es ist alles schlüssig und doch ist die Szene für mich irgendwie unrund. Ich habe meine Geschichten und besonders die Enden immer gerne so abgeschlossen, das ich nicht noch viel reininterpretieren und mich fragen muss, wie es für die ein oder andere Person weiterging. Das fand ich ein bisschen schade.
Ansonsten: Ganz klare Leseempfehlung meinerseits !
December 11, 2020
Well-written novel with both standard and clever dehumanizing language used by abortion supporters.
Supposedly meant for teens, this abortion novel can be enjoyed by all ages. Pro-life readers studying how anti-life/pro-abortion people dehumanize the unborn child will be especially delighted in the plot and clever language.
Touchell does a remarkable job of using the dehumanizing technique made famous by Ernest Hemingway (calling the unborn child an “it”), and she adds several new twists to the anti-life/pro-abortion dehumanizing lexicon.
While one use of “it” is ambiguous (whether the term refers to the teens’ reactions about the pregnancy in general or to the unborn child him- or herself; see page 64), the uses of “it” to refer to the unborn child are extensive, closely followed by “thing” as another term to demean the unborn child.
Liv, the best friend of Rose, the aborted mother, suggests that she “get rid of it” (56). Rose thinks the baby isn’t already, but “would […] become a real thing” (56). Michael, Rose’s lover and father of the child, also queries, “Could they get rid of it?” (58). Rose thinks of the baby as “the thing” and “it” (67). Michael calls the unborn child an “it” who is now “like a manatee in his spinal fluid” (85). When she thinks she is not pregnant but just has a delayed period, Rose declares that “I just created this thing in my mind” (115). After she miscarries, Rose simply states that “It went away” (124). When Michael and she reflect on what to do with the child’s body, Rose commands Michael, “Bring it to me”; “’It must be buried,’ Rose said again” (126; italics in original). Looking at the corpse of the child, Rose calls her “the tiny gray thing” (128). Even when he is drunk, Michael obsesses over the child’s burial, saying, “We buried it” (159).
Two of Touchell’s items of dehumanizing language towards the unborn child are certainly unique: snot and virus. Michael compares having an abortion to “picking your nose” (58). Certainly, likening his own unborn child (daughter) to snot says a great deal about this wayward young man.
Equating the unborn child to a virus may be a new entry in the fictional anti-life lexicon. Michael concludes that his father’s disappointment in him is “just as much a virus as this thing inside of Rose” (62). He repeats the metaphor later, referring to “this virus inside her” (82). Rose herself uses this metaphor often; she says, “I have a virus in me” (97) when she is pregnant and “The virus had gone away” (172) after her miscarriage.
Rose clearly manifests post-abortion syndrome (PAS). The novel is not a typical teen abortion work, where the mother goes to an abortion clinic to have the child killed; Rose is depicted as miscarrying, so the abortion occurring in this novel is not an elective, but a spontaneous abortion, morally neutral. What may interest the reader more, though, is determining whether Rose’s intention and efforts to kill the unborn child herself (by smoking, depriving herself of food, etc.) meet the criteria of moral culpability in the child’s killing.
What’s even more interesting is that Rose follows a trajectory of personality defragmentation after the miscarriage and after the police come to speak with her on finding the baby’s body which the teens buried in an empty lot. She becomes “disconnected” and “more detached and confused” (172). She calls her thrust into reality “this disconnection” (181). Another character labels Rose a “vacuous caricature” (186). At novel’s end, only Michael obviously experiences “relief” after he apparently confessed his role in the child’s burial (189).
Taking only half a day to read, this novel not only definitely entertains, but also allows pro-lifers to study several linguistic ways that anti-life/pro-abortion people try to make the unborn child less than human.
Supposedly meant for teens, this abortion novel can be enjoyed by all ages. Pro-life readers studying how anti-life/pro-abortion people dehumanize the unborn child will be especially delighted in the plot and clever language.
Touchell does a remarkable job of using the dehumanizing technique made famous by Ernest Hemingway (calling the unborn child an “it”), and she adds several new twists to the anti-life/pro-abortion dehumanizing lexicon.
While one use of “it” is ambiguous (whether the term refers to the teens’ reactions about the pregnancy in general or to the unborn child him- or herself; see page 64), the uses of “it” to refer to the unborn child are extensive, closely followed by “thing” as another term to demean the unborn child.
Liv, the best friend of Rose, the aborted mother, suggests that she “get rid of it” (56). Rose thinks the baby isn’t already, but “would […] become a real thing” (56). Michael, Rose’s lover and father of the child, also queries, “Could they get rid of it?” (58). Rose thinks of the baby as “the thing” and “it” (67). Michael calls the unborn child an “it” who is now “like a manatee in his spinal fluid” (85). When she thinks she is not pregnant but just has a delayed period, Rose declares that “I just created this thing in my mind” (115). After she miscarries, Rose simply states that “It went away” (124). When Michael and she reflect on what to do with the child’s body, Rose commands Michael, “Bring it to me”; “’It must be buried,’ Rose said again” (126; italics in original). Looking at the corpse of the child, Rose calls her “the tiny gray thing” (128). Even when he is drunk, Michael obsesses over the child’s burial, saying, “We buried it” (159).
Two of Touchell’s items of dehumanizing language towards the unborn child are certainly unique: snot and virus. Michael compares having an abortion to “picking your nose” (58). Certainly, likening his own unborn child (daughter) to snot says a great deal about this wayward young man.
Equating the unborn child to a virus may be a new entry in the fictional anti-life lexicon. Michael concludes that his father’s disappointment in him is “just as much a virus as this thing inside of Rose” (62). He repeats the metaphor later, referring to “this virus inside her” (82). Rose herself uses this metaphor often; she says, “I have a virus in me” (97) when she is pregnant and “The virus had gone away” (172) after her miscarriage.
Rose clearly manifests post-abortion syndrome (PAS). The novel is not a typical teen abortion work, where the mother goes to an abortion clinic to have the child killed; Rose is depicted as miscarrying, so the abortion occurring in this novel is not an elective, but a spontaneous abortion, morally neutral. What may interest the reader more, though, is determining whether Rose’s intention and efforts to kill the unborn child herself (by smoking, depriving herself of food, etc.) meet the criteria of moral culpability in the child’s killing.
What’s even more interesting is that Rose follows a trajectory of personality defragmentation after the miscarriage and after the police come to speak with her on finding the baby’s body which the teens buried in an empty lot. She becomes “disconnected” and “more detached and confused” (172). She calls her thrust into reality “this disconnection” (181). Another character labels Rose a “vacuous caricature” (186). At novel’s end, only Michael obviously experiences “relief” after he apparently confessed his role in the child’s burial (189).
Taking only half a day to read, this novel not only definitely entertains, but also allows pro-lifers to study several linguistic ways that anti-life/pro-abortion people try to make the unborn child less than human.
January 4, 2026
(Ignore anything uh. Bad?? that I've written, it's currently 1am and I'm very tired)
A rather decent book on the topic of teen pregnancy. It did a great job at showing the complexity of the situation and the reasoning behind the characters' very questionable/morally grey choices.
Rose's spiral into madness felt quite realistic and her thought processes during dissociation were really well done. I do wish the relationship between Rose and her unborn child was explored more because not once did she think the fetus was anything other than a virus to flush out. Like, not even a little bit of maternal instincts, or at the very least some hesitation? But no, let's jump straight to smoking to kill it quickly. Although she makes a lot of stupid decisions, I can see how anxiety-driven they are, so I'm more uhh... lenient??
Thank god Michael actually felt like a real character rather than a misogynistic alpha male caricature, like he has his own struggles with living up to expectations, but he never truly abandons her. Liv is undoubtedly the best person in this entire story, no explanation needed (Michael did NOT deserve her help after allat). I loved the subversion where the promiscuous girl is the most reliable friend idk I think slut-shaming is lame and it was nice.
You know what else was (kinda-ish) lame? That ending. Jesus christ it was super dramatic and tense. Like it very effectively raised the stakes but also whyyyyy did we have allat if it's OPEN-ENDED. We go to the police and then NOTHING??? If you want to add drama, commit to the drama goddamnit!! Let me see the interrogation and the aftermath!! It kinda broke the immersion for me since the plot was really heavy and then it got kinda unrealistic with the whole "scandal". Also they didn't really explain how they linked Rose and Michael to the bush baby that much? Idk maybe I was sleep-deprived but it felt glossed-over. Hell, the whole ending felt glossed over!
I quite enjoyed the writing style although it did feel a bit ramble-y at times. This book is short but wow does it not hold back. You get to see all the gruesome details and horrible decisions and intrusive thoughts. There is no sugar-coating and when shit gets heavy, it gets graphic. It very explicitly details alllllll of the horrors.
So yeah, it was an alright book. Read if you want an incredibly dark exploration of the consequences of teen pregnancy and don't mind open endings.
A rather decent book on the topic of teen pregnancy. It did a great job at showing the complexity of the situation and the reasoning behind the characters' very questionable/morally grey choices.
Rose's spiral into madness felt quite realistic and her thought processes during dissociation were really well done. I do wish the relationship between Rose and her unborn child was explored more because not once did she think the fetus was anything other than a virus to flush out. Like, not even a little bit of maternal instincts, or at the very least some hesitation? But no, let's jump straight to smoking to kill it quickly. Although she makes a lot of stupid decisions, I can see how anxiety-driven they are, so I'm more uhh... lenient??
Thank god Michael actually felt like a real character rather than a misogynistic alpha male caricature, like he has his own struggles with living up to expectations, but he never truly abandons her. Liv is undoubtedly the best person in this entire story, no explanation needed (Michael did NOT deserve her help after allat). I loved the subversion where the promiscuous girl is the most reliable friend idk I think slut-shaming is lame and it was nice.
You know what else was (kinda-ish) lame? That ending. Jesus christ it was super dramatic and tense. Like it very effectively raised the stakes but also whyyyyy did we have allat if it's OPEN-ENDED. We go to the police and then NOTHING??? If you want to add drama, commit to the drama goddamnit!! Let me see the interrogation and the aftermath!! It kinda broke the immersion for me since the plot was really heavy and then it got kinda unrealistic with the whole "scandal". Also they didn't really explain how they linked Rose and Michael to the bush baby that much? Idk maybe I was sleep-deprived but it felt glossed-over. Hell, the whole ending felt glossed over!
I quite enjoyed the writing style although it did feel a bit ramble-y at times. This book is short but wow does it not hold back. You get to see all the gruesome details and horrible decisions and intrusive thoughts. There is no sugar-coating and when shit gets heavy, it gets graphic. It very explicitly details alllllll of the horrors.
So yeah, it was an alright book. Read if you want an incredibly dark exploration of the consequences of teen pregnancy and don't mind open endings.
April 18, 2020
Wow, dieses Buch hat wirklich mehr bereit gehalten, als ich gedacht hätte.
Mit einem für ein Jugendbuch doch sehr anspruchsvollen Schreibstil voller Metaphern und Worten zwischen den Zeilen ist das Buch für mich auf jeden Fall etwas besonderes. Auf nicht einmal 300 Seiten wird eine Menge erzählt.
Die Hauptfiguren Rose und Michael sind wirklich gut gezeichnet, wobei ich mir bei Rose fast noch mehr Tiefgang zu Beginn gewünscht häte, um ihre Handlungen später besser nachvollziehen zu können.
Wenn man den Klappentext liest, erhält man den Eindruck, es gehe um eine dramatische Liebesgeschichte - im Grunde richtig, aber da ist noch so viel mehr, was aber jeder Leser für sich selbst entdecken sollte. Auf jeden Fall bekommt man eien Story, die ich so im Jugendbuchbereich bisher nicht lesen durfte und die einem wirklich an die Nieren geht.
Die Geschichte wird glaubhaft geschildert, allerdings fand ich, dass die Autorin einiges an Potenzial verschenkt hat. Und so war es nicht einmal das relativ offene Ende, das mich mit einem Gefühl der Unfertigkeit zurückgelassen hat. Deswegen gibt es von mir auch nur 3 Sterne.
Mit einem für ein Jugendbuch doch sehr anspruchsvollen Schreibstil voller Metaphern und Worten zwischen den Zeilen ist das Buch für mich auf jeden Fall etwas besonderes. Auf nicht einmal 300 Seiten wird eine Menge erzählt.
Die Hauptfiguren Rose und Michael sind wirklich gut gezeichnet, wobei ich mir bei Rose fast noch mehr Tiefgang zu Beginn gewünscht häte, um ihre Handlungen später besser nachvollziehen zu können.
Wenn man den Klappentext liest, erhält man den Eindruck, es gehe um eine dramatische Liebesgeschichte - im Grunde richtig, aber da ist noch so viel mehr, was aber jeder Leser für sich selbst entdecken sollte. Auf jeden Fall bekommt man eien Story, die ich so im Jugendbuchbereich bisher nicht lesen durfte und die einem wirklich an die Nieren geht.
Die Geschichte wird glaubhaft geschildert, allerdings fand ich, dass die Autorin einiges an Potenzial verschenkt hat. Und so war es nicht einmal das relativ offene Ende, das mich mit einem Gefühl der Unfertigkeit zurückgelassen hat. Deswegen gibt es von mir auch nur 3 Sterne.
March 1, 2024
„Kleiner Wahn“ war mein zweites Buch von Touchell. Es hinterließ ein unangenehmes, erschütterndes Gefühl, genau das, was meiner Meinung nach die Geschichte auch bewirken soll. Wir begleiten Rose und Michael in ihrer zarten, neuen Beziehung (völlig kitschfrei) und bei ihrem ersten Mal. Bei ihrem zweiten Mal. Ungeschützt. Und die schlimme Ahnung bewahrtet sich:
Rose wird schwanger und verdrängt es. Und Michael verdrängt, dass Rose schwanger ist. Und so nimmt das Unheil seinen Lauf. Und wir können nur dabei zusehen. Wir sind Beobachtende. Kein Dialog, kein Gedanke, keine Handlung ist beschönigt, nein sogar hässlich. Ich fand das Buch nicht leicht zu verdauen aber absolut schockierend und eindrucksvoll.
Rose wird schwanger und verdrängt es. Und Michael verdrängt, dass Rose schwanger ist. Und so nimmt das Unheil seinen Lauf. Und wir können nur dabei zusehen. Wir sind Beobachtende. Kein Dialog, kein Gedanke, keine Handlung ist beschönigt, nein sogar hässlich. Ich fand das Buch nicht leicht zu verdauen aber absolut schockierend und eindrucksvoll.
November 1, 2019
I did not like this book very much. One of the main reasons why was that I found most if not all of the characters extremely unlikable, if this was intentional, I don't know, but it made it difficult to read. The topic of the book is a common issue in today's society that I believe should have more light shed on it. This book was not afraid to go into gory details that other authors may have shied away from. While I appreciated the harsh reality shown in some moments of the book, it did make me a bit uneasy and feel bad for the characters, Rose in particular, more. I would not say this is one of the better books I have read, but it also wasn't the worst.
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