Bullet

Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter #19

by Laurell K. Hamilton, Alessandro Zabini (Translator)

In tanti anni di servizio presso la Animators, Inc., Anita Blake ne ha viste di tutti i colori e, ormai, non esiste più nulla in grado di spaventarla. O almeno così credeva… Perché una notizia le fa correre un brivido lungo la schiena: lo spirito della Madre di Tutte le Tenebre è sopravvissuto all'esplosione che ha bruciato il suo corpo, e ora si aggira per St Louis alla ricerca di un «ospite» di cui prendere possesso. E la scelta è caduta proprio su Anita. La Sterminatrice ha le ore contate, a meno di non trovare un modo per annientare la vampira primigenia una volta per tutte. Sfortunatamente, però, né lei né Jean-Claude sono abbastanza forti, e la loro unica speranza è creare un'alleanza con tutte le creature mannare: solo combattendo insieme, accumulerebbero un potere sufficiente per contrastare la Madre di Tutte le Tenebre. Anita quindi è costretta a chiedere aiuto alle tigri mannare, il clan più grande e influente di St. Louis. Ma ogni cosa ha un prezzo e, ben presto, la Sterminatrice si renderà conto che quello delle tigri mannare è pericolosamente alto…

Genres: Urban Fantasy, Paranormal, Vampires, Fantasy, Romance, Paranormal Romance, Fiction

420 pages, Hardcover

First published June 1, 2010

About the author

Laurell K. Hamilton is one of the leading writers of paranormal fiction. A #1 New York Times bestselling author, Hamilton writes the popular Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter novels and the Meredith Gentry series. She is also the creator of a bestselling comic book series based on her Anita Blake novels and published by Marvel Comics. Hamilton is a full-time writer and lives in the suburbs of St. Louis with her family.

Reviews

[LMM · Rating 1 out of 5]

I am normally a loyal fan & have a lot of patience for LKH in general. I have hung in there with Anita (& Merry) & when many fans started turning away calling the series "porn" - I still liked it, still defended it, was still very into the stories & the characters (bar a few).

This book crashed & burned the series IMO. It was a pathetic mess. I don't even know what this was. I think LKH's massive amount of hubris made her lose the plot.

This was an extension of LKH's narcissistic ego (she even dressed Anita in clothing that SHE herself has posed in. Look at her gallery on her website...although it's not the 1st time she's done this). It makes me wonder - has being married to a younger man done more harm than good b'c her blogs often talk about nothing but the great sex she is getting from him & clearly...CLEARLY she is projecting into her novels. This one more than ever.

God I don't even know where to begin w/this book it was such a mess. Not even a hot mess...just a plain old pathetic, tired, overused mess.

What she did in this book:

#1 - Anita's vagina has officially become the Macgyver of all vagina's.

It can DO anything.....Next up - Anita gains another power & cures cancer, AID's, smallpox, what have you - all while finally brokering peace between the Israelis & Palestinians. What does the President have to say about it?? "If anyone can do it. Anita can!"

Although IMO, her cooter more came across like a Venus Flycrotch. Once these men & women have a taste, there's no getting out..muuuah ha ha!!

No seriously - Um...she doesn't even have to raise the ardeur anymore to even roll people? All she has to do is have sex full stop? See what happens with Meph/Devil. See?? Venus Flycrotch. That shit is dangerous.

(Oh yeah, she does women now too but don't worry - she only kisses & grinds the gal while getting done from behind. Greedy girl still saves the pole for herself).

#2 - LKH officially relegates the fabulous character of Jean Claude to nothing more than a mere prop to help Anita deal with her faux (& I mean faux as in - cringe inducing it's so fake) angst.

I'm not surprised this has been a long time coming. LKH is in love with her were's (esp. b'c Nate & Micha seem to be an paper mosh up of her hubby) & as a result - JC wasn't in the last THREE books!

But what she did to him here?? Shocking. As my friend said - she turned him into a "pussy whipped fool"

It also seems she is letting him go b'c apparently she no longer minds sharing him w/other women or men.

#3 - before the book was released LKH banged on & on on her blog how she killed a character & it was soooo upsetting for her & we the reader will be "destroyed by it."

**SPOILER**






Haven?? Seriously? Haven? I have to laugh in LKH's face & spit out my water while doing it! She is so out of touch it's not funny.

I mean for God's sake - we never even saw Anita sleep with him! And not like there is any emotional resonance to any of her sex scenes anymore - but that only compounds the reason for zero emotional connection!

WTF Ms. Hamilton? WTF..??


#4 - Here's what's the funniest to me - she fishes in her work as to how people feel & see her via her characters.

Anita is like an emotional robot...."I don't understand why Haven would go for Nathaniel". And then JC has to lay it out in layman's terms & Richard has to bare his soul. It is a joke b'c it's on such a personal level for LKH.

LKH has NO sense of humor so she herself, doesn't "get" it...see things that other people would b'c they have a modicum of humility that a sense of humor affords a person.

Therefore, Anita doesn't have one either & we have this pathetic scene written in. This emotional fishing scene was more of LKH trying to justify her reasons for having Anita be a sex goddess who people can't help but get addicted to. It just so sad. LKH needs to separate herself & get a grip on her ego.

Wah, wah...LKH, seriously - if you need to be reassured by your characters b'c down deep you know that you are so insecure you're on the verge of a nervous breakdown - maybe you should rethink the younger man thing.

Like I said, it's a joke b'c it's so obviously personal. I'm actually embarrassed for her.


#5 - She creepily has a 5 year old show his attraction to Anita. Yuck. Ick. So f-ing gross. I really don't know the point of this bit of info.


#6 - She doesn't explain (at all) Anita's apparent new power being able to steal other vampire powers.


#7 - The Sex Scenes. Come people! They're just NOT hot. LKH thinks she is writing progressive, great sex.

For the 1st time I can say it was like actual bad, cheesy porn (I actually can't believe I am saying this)! What makes a sex scene hot & great is the emotional connection you have to the characters. You care about them so care about what's happening to them.

Tell me why I should care about Anita in an orgy/gang bang, getting it on w/characters I have never met before, in a room full of people who love her & are forced to watch her seduce stranger after stranger?

Or even better - partake with people they normally never would b'c they happen to be there when she unleashes the ardeur?

Honestly - it's cringe inducing b'c Anita comes across as used up. She comes across whoreish for power & just keeps using her sex to get more & more of it. It's just gross.


#8 - LKH & Anita's love of Nate. Ever since he came on the scene, Anita's boundaries have been seriously pushed... I mean pushed (Furry sex anyone)?

She can't see the forest for the trees, she is fool for his shit. He is completely passive aggressive in his need for her to be Dominant. She goes out of her mind & way for him to the detriment of other characters who are far more interesting.

Haven - was actually truly interesting to me. And in so many ways - he wanted to be equal with her. What does LKH do? Kill him for it b'c Anita can't have any dominates in her life. She is after all the Queen Bee.

So all these once great, complicated characters? JC, Richard, Haven, Auggie, Requiem, Wicked Truth, London (where is London BTW?).....

They have been made shadows of themselves. Tweaked to fit in & just accept whatever bullshit Anita throws at them. And if they don't? Watch out! That Macgyver punani may just smother them in their sleep.

Laurell K Hamilton......it's time you got a grip & got over yourself. Do whatever it is you have to do to get clear, get a sense of humor & lighten up in order to gain some real perspective & be truly creative.

Lose the chip on your shoulder, it's doing nothing but hurting your creation & making her laughing stock. You can stop proving things to all the people in your life who told you, you were crap & your writing sucked. Your a success now & a pioneer - we got it.

Enough rebellion & making points just b'c you've gotten to the stage in your career where you can. You are abusing your success & laying your true talent to waste. Just write.

People aren't jealous of Anita b'c she doesn't have the right looks to fit in with the other mother's or b'c she has a harem of gorgeous men.....you have actually made her highly unlikable b'c she is so out of touch with the reality of things.

To put it straight - Anita is a total ass. Completely delusional, self-righteous, demanding, greedy, selfish, grumpy & just not cool at all.

Seriously...no amount of "creamy goodness" is that appealing. Yuk.

Get a reality check finally so you can get the grip you so desperately need, then get a therapist in order to get clear so you can be the great storyteller we know you can be.

If not - put a once great series to bed.

[MischaS_ · Rating 1 out of 5]

I felt that the last books had zero plot. Now I want to apologise to that book because THIS had no plot at all.

Whoever wrote the annotation for this book should get a HUGE award. Because it has more plot than the book itself.

The style of writing is getting worse and worse. So much repetition and stupid description of how beautiful someone is. And still, overly describing characters we know for several books. How anyone could anyone think that it was okay to have three years old kid pretty much hitting on Anita? That's plain wrong!

Anita is someone I have a strong distaste for, and she just made it even worst.

There was way too much yummy mounded goodness going on in front of me...

Don't get me wrong, I can be pretty vain but this... but this sounds so wrong... and I just cannot anymore.

Thanks to this I also started to hate the word "dance".

...dance under my body...

...dance her hips...

...danced over him...

...danced between them...

[Literary Ames · Rating 1 out of 5]

Stay away from it. Stay away. If you had any love for this series at any point, do not read this book. If you do, make sure you're a fan of erotica including m/m, m/m/f, f/f, and BDSM.

It’s shocking the abrupt u-turn the series takes with Bullet, deciding that sex (and lots of it) is better than guns, blood and action. The death of a character (not an important one so don’t worry) was anti-climactic, it was a good scene but I expected the death to be of someone a lot closer to Anita, and therefore more painful but she agonises over it anyway, despite knowing all along that they may have to die.

Right off the bat we go into repetitive descriptive overload. Sex politics, self-pity and whining is in abundance. LKH even uses a three-year old boy in the first chapter to give us hope that Anita will rein in her loose ways, and then uses him again (at his expense, which offended me - children should be protected) at the end to stick two fingers up at those that dislike the porn. And I’m sad to say this did read like emotionless porn -the group sex with multiple voyeurs made me think "porn movie set" with everyone taking turns. And they were doing it to save lives or for political reasons rather than because they wanted it or because they loved each other. And since when was Anita OK with her men having sex with other women, or even Anita herself having sex with women? What?! Will the real Anita please stand up?

Which leads me on to the main characters themselves who've have changed in ways I don't feel are realistic and the number of side characters has grown to a point where I don't remember who they are. Although LKH attempts to soothe my newfound dislike of Anita at the end of Flirt by making her remorseful. I can’t say it worked. She has become all-powerful and arrogant, a combination which is off-putting to put it mildly. Plus the reference to her and others possibly doing evil things in order to do good has put me on edge.

All the bits that interested me, like the plot, shocking that there even was one but it was thin throughout. It was alluded to but there was little depth. Many references were made to previous books, characters reappear with Anita's relationships with them being reassessed however, big events happen elsewhere whilst we were stuck watching Anita have sex with everything that moved. I’m not exaggerating. I’m not even sure I have enough fingers to count out how many times she had sex, or even with the number of people. At least she wasn't the only one getting it this time. Although the m/m scene between Asher and Jean Claude was incredibly disappointing. They'd been pining for each other, desperate to re-consummate their love for so long, you'd think LKH could've taken the time to describe the emotional side of it better.

More happened in the concluding chapter than in the entire book, which focused heavily on the tigers. I couldn't care less about them really, the info dump was boring. Given the chance I’d have wanted to witness the events (especially in Atlanta) in that chapter rather than the sex or sex politics. Instead they were glossed over. So sad.

I dragged myself through this book, and employed everything possible to get to that last page. I skimmed, I skipped paragraphs/pages – there’s only so much repetitive description I could take. I can’t read another sex scene for a bit because I’ve had enough. Enough. Yep, that’s how I feel about this series now. Enough. I’m done.

If I sound angry, bitter and wistful it’s because I’m all of those things. I’m angry that old-Anita is nowhere to be found despite her reappearance in the past couple of books. I’m bitter because I wasn’t expecting the abrupt change back to everything revolving around sex. I had hope and LKH had encouraged it, that old-Anita was resurfacing. She crushed it so forcefully that I don’t want anything more to do with her.

This series to me is now a sick and mangy wolf that needs to be put down, it's begging for an end to it's suffering. It needs a Bullet to the brain.

[CS · Rating 1 out of 5]

Bullet Review:

(Get it?! BULLET Review? Of BULLET? Don't we have some BULLET inception going on here??)

Proof positive that LKH:

A) No longer gives a sh!t for her fans.

B) Is writing out her personal sexual fantasy.

C) Has absolutely no editor/editor needs to be tortured.

This is the biggest piece of sh!t since "Incubus Dreams" and "Danse Macabre". Pointless, plotless, meandering, with more scenes talking about everyone's feelings and sexual pairings (not necessarily sex, mind you!) than anything to do with a "plot". Not sure at this point LKH even knows what a "plot" is - I'm pretty sure she thinks endless conversations with Anita asking "What does that mean?" and "Am I missing something?" constitute a plot.

Biggest entertainment value is from how ludicrous the writing is and how positively awful the book gets. A shame, because at one point a plot threatens to take over the book. Fortunately, LKH "saves" the book from having any merit by giving the most powerful necromancer in a hundred years the pitiful excuse that traveling is "too dangerous" and therefore she must stay locked up in the Circus of the Impotent - I mean, Damned.

If this can get published, ANYTHING can get published.

Full review:

"Funny how it's never your fault when you have to have sex with all these men, Anita." - Monica
"'I don't mean to be callous, but whatever you're feeling, get over it.' - Nicky

Cover Blurb:

The triumvirate created by master vampire Jean-Claude, necromancer Anita Blake, and werewolf Richard Zeeman has made Jean-Claude one of the most powerful vampires in the U.S. -with the result that assassins are coming to St. Louis to kill them all.

Whoever wrote this cover blurb needs a raise.

No, wait. Whoever wrote this cover blurb needs to take over the writing of these Anita Blake books.

Because honestly that cover blurb has more plot in one sentence than the ENTIRETY of "Bullet".

I take that back; there IS plot in this book. It is this:



and this:



and THIS:


Just pretend that all these women have curly black hair and GINORMOUS boobs.

And when it is not any of those, it is HOURS UPON HOURS OF this:



Only with 30 other men all in various states of undress. And a b!tchy, curly-haired woman who refers to her own breasts as "creamy goodness".

"There was way too much yummy mounded goodness going on in front of me for me to be entirely comfortable meeting a roomful of strangers..."

Don't believe me? I made a break-down of how much time was spent on these things for about the first half of the book and here's what I came up with:

+ approx 1 hour spent at a dance recital for a kid who is not related to the Main Characters. Dance recital was for KIDS and focused more on Nathaniel and Jason. (And Stephen?)

+ approx 1 hour spent with Asher arguing about his power and wanting to have sex.

+ approx 45 min spent with Richard whinging about the dramaz he's endured since book 2. This is ALL RECAP for those of us who have read since the beginning.

+ approx 45 min spent on an unsexy orgy with Anita (no surprise), Richard, Jean-Claude, and Asher. It has B-D-S-M, meaning the B-D-S-M that non-practitioners or baby practitioners think is super cool.

+ approx 30 min spent with a pile of men including Richard, JC, Asher, Jason, Nathaniel, Micah, Crispin (who is this again?) and Nicky (the "bride" of Anita", because she poisoned him, isn't that CUTE?) on Anita. Belle Morte does that "appearing to everyone" bit and Marmee Noir makes a "I'm gonna keeeel you, MUAHAHAHAHAHA!" appearance.

+ approx 45 min Anita recounting the events to Max, Viviana, and Augustine and asking "What does that mean?" over and over again. While she reclines on a bed, with a bunch of naked men covered in lion goop.

+ approx 30 min of Anita facing off Haven (may I add, this is just in the living room of the Circus of the Damned, mere yards from an earlier black-out orgy - one, might I add that was non-consensual, but that EVERYONE wishes they could have been there)

+ approx 30 min of Anita talking about the post-black-out orgy that Marmee Noir did for EVULZ reasons (while they are all nude and covered in goop)

+ approx 30 min of Anita arguing with Haven (wherein he whines about her not "loving him" and wanting him as her Rex)

So, uh...where's the EVUL assassins the cover blurb promised? How are Anita and Richard and Jean-Claude getting so uber powerful?



Oh right...I'm just a prudey prude who doesn't like sex. It's not like I'm a reader who maybe kinda was expecting, oh, I don't know, a STORY, a PLOT in this book. Nope, prudey prude. Gotcha.

I started reading these books about two years ago because everyone talked about how awesome they were, how gritty, how they were like the best Urban Fantasy out there (with the caveat "up until Obsidian Butterfly"). I was never a fan of Anita because I thought she was a horrible woman who acted like a child and never grew up - but damn if that Anita wasn't a Saint compared to this one.

At least she didn't ask "What does that mean?" or "Am I missing something?" EVER OTHER PARAGRAPH.



Seriously, woman, you've been in this field for 4+ years, and you've been doing the horizontal tango with paranormals since like book 4. YOU SHOULD KNOW THIS ALREADY.

But no, Anita Blake hasn't grown one twit since Book 1. She's still the same angry, violent, clueless woman. She still has hangups about having sex, which is weird given she's been having sex for more books than she was not. And, in her defense, I don't care for how often she HAS to have sex or HAS to add a new partner. But beyond that - shouldn't she be used to this thing by now?

I guess I could talk about the other 50 billion men that are in this book. Oh and three women. Because Anita's world is almost 100% male. I'm not even joking; I canNOT even attempt to write all the male names that I came across. Beyond Micah, Nathaniel, JC, Richard, Asher, Damien, Jason, and Haven, there were loads and loads and loads more. Guards, potential sex partners, Masters of the City. Sure, a couple of token women like Claudia and Cardinal and Viviana were thrown in. But when you can count the women on two hands and the men outnumber them 30:1, you have a problem.

And these men! Good God, LKH can spend 80 paragraphs on their clothes:

"Jean-Claude's black leather pants looked poured on, and his boots rose up over his thighs like a second skin. I didn't have to see the back of his boots to see they laced all the way up his leg."

In short, he looks like a fisherman going out to wade.

and the special shade of green their eyes are:

"I gazed up into those midnight blue eyes so dark that a few shades darker and the blue would have been lost to a black. But they were forever the blue of the sky just as the light begins to leave but darkness is still a few breaths away."

Sorry, blue.

But I still couldn't tell them apart in a lineup. Other than their One Defining CharacteristicTM:

Jean-Claude: Calls Anita "Ma Petit"
Richard: Manly man
Micah: Kitty-cat eyes
Nathaniel: Ankle-length hair
Asher: Most beautiful angsty bisexual EVAH
Jason: Anita's sometime lover
Damien: GREEN eyes, greener than anything that was ever green

And that's all there is to these characters now. In the course of this book, two characters die (leading Anita to spend hours upon hours wangsting over their deaths), but I honestly barely remembered one and didn't give two sh!ts that the other one died. I was actually grateful as he was one of her boytoys - until she went and acquired a new one. Named Mephistopheles.



Dear Ms. Hamilton: STOP USING STUPID NAMES FOR YOUR CHARACTERS. You are in your 40's, not some emo, angsty teenager writing out her wet dreams.

Or maybe...

I really could go on and on about all the individual stupid things in this book. The latent misogyny and sexism (once again, ALL WOMEN buy the latest fashions and dresses and can't believe it when you don't!). The inability to understand what makes a person gay or bisexual (and no, it's not because they were abused by the opposite sex and are "taking a break"). How everyone has sex for every reason EXCEPT for how they want to get lucky. How the word spill has been violently abused to describe everything EXCEPT LIQUIDS.

""All my scrambling in the pillows during the orgasm had spilled me to one side of the mounded pillows, so that they hid the other two men."

But now I want to rag on the writing. Because people...THIS GOT PUBLISHED. UNDER A BIG NAME. AND PEOPLE BOUGHT IT HARDCOVER PRICE. And at the risk of losing my credibility, this isn't like EL James or the many push-to-publish authors who wrote fanfiction and brushed it up a bit for self-publish or even big name. They HAVE excuses for having juvenile, choppy, bad prose. But LKH should know better; this is her more than her 19th book!

Top 5 LKH Quotes That Make You Question Life, the Universe, Everything

1. "I felt myself smile, and it wasn't a nice smile." It was a not nice smile. A smile that would smile it's way into your heart, smile and then smile as it smiled at you.

2. "It tasted good enough that I knew I was a lot hungrier than I knew." I also knew that this book would be worse than I knew.

3. "If I craved it and gave into it, I would be the monster. I didn't want to be the monster...was that monstrous? ...the only difference between being the monster and being powerful was choosing not to be the monster. Not today. But there would always be tomorrow and another chance to choose." Ah, Anita Blake, Philosopher. Actually, given how this series has devolved from Vampire Hunter to Vampire Humper, that would be an improvement.

4. "We'd discovered that if you left the drink in the screwtop cups that helped stirred them up, you never really got the cups clean. The remains of the protein powder solidified in the cracks and crevices, and you just had to throw out the cup." Because it's more important that a VAMPIRE HUNTER novel talk about how to clean the crap out of a protein shake cup than about killing Vampires.

5. "Tell me you don't want him, and this stops here. But if you want him the way I felt you want him, then don't lie to yourself or to him. Want him or don't want him, but if you want him, let yourself want him."



What "progress" "Skin Trade", "The Harlequin" and even "Flirt" made to "bring Anita back" is completely gone here. And the sad thing is, it didn't have to be this way. At one point, Anita gets a call to consult, and the story thread is just as good as anything in the earlier books. The only problem is that Anita chickens out of going to Atlanta to DO SOMETHING, saying it's "too dangerous" for the most powerful necromancer and 80 of her guards to leave and, I dunno, hunt some vampires.

These books are the bottom of the barrel, the only entertainment value being in noting how many times the word "spill" is used and, my favorite, Anita Blake Bingo. And yes, I did win, even if it took me to the very end of the book.

[The Flooze · Rating 1 out of 5]

If my updates weren’t expressive enough, I’ll reiterate: This is the most tedious drivel I’ve read in a long time…or perhaps ever.

Although the idea of a vampire civil war should be a thrilling one, LKH’s writing deprives it of all excitement. The events of this book seem like a rehash of every other attack we’ve seen on the supernatural sect of St. Louis. If you’re a long-time reader of the series, very little will seem new.

I could easily blather on about the lack of innovation present in Bullet, but instead I’ll focus on a few irksome aspects. Although I’ve never envisioned Anita as a startling intellect, the dialogue here paints her as an absolute mental midget. Pages and pages of various men explaining simple concepts to her and Anita continuously parroting: “But why?” “What does that mean?” “What does he mean by that?” “What am I missing?” Apparently, my dear, you are missing a vast amount of brain power. And when she finally grasps the idea presented, her only response is: “I don’t know what to say to that.”

The basics of this exchange are repeated every few pages, making most conversations feel like pulling teeth and inspiring me to smack my forehead no less than twenty times. If Anita is this thick, I can’t imagine how she’s managed to live this long, never mind build her power center up to unfathomable proportions.

Hand-in-hand with Anita’s stupidity is her inability to be reasonable. Constantly on the defensive, she forces all of her men to tiptoe around her in trepidation. And yet! She feels immeasurable guilt about having taken away Nicky’s free will. Guess what, dumb-dumb. With every one around you in fear of getting dumped--or perhaps shot--absolutely no one in the group can exercise free will. They are all slaves of some sort to the sorcerous snatch.

Speaking of that wondrous body part, I’ve heard time and again that this series is as much about Anita’s “sexual awakening” as it is about vampires and weres, oh my. Though I grant that she’s come a long way from the virginal prude of Guilty Pleasures, Anita has not been awakened. She has been coerced, cajoled, convinced, and given the excuses she needs to allow herself--after much waffling--to fall into bed with various people. Even in this book, she spends more time trying to get out of having sex than she does actively wanting it. It is only when someone badgers her into responding to her “monstrous” side that she willingly goes along with physical intimacy. More often than not, she is embarrassed by her sexual desires. That does not scream “awakening” to me.

I’d already decided when I read Flirt that I would no longer throw money into LKH’s coffers. Having gotten Bullet from the library, I think even that small nod of encouragement was wasted on her. The quality of writing is beneath that of any writer I’m familiar with. Her plots have become secondary to descriptions of wardrobe, hair, and seating plans. Sex scenes are robbed of eroticism. Dialogue brings the action to a screeching, painful halt. I no longer find anything of merit in the Anita Blake series, so I bid these characters a not-so-fond adieu. Don’t let the door smack you on the way out.

[mlady_rebecca · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Bullet" was all the good things I like to see in an "Anita Blake" book, and some.

1. It was home in St. Louis, because - aside from "Bloody Bones", "Blue Moon", and "Blood Noir" (all "B" names - weird) - all of the out of town books seem to be lacking something.

2. It included the fullest cast list we've seen since (at least) "The Harlequin". And most of those cast members had more than a walk on role.

3. It was heavy on vampire and furry politics, and light on federal marshal duties.

4. The little we saw of federal marshal duties, showed that Anita continues to embrace the role of advocate over the role of executioner. (Off stage, we find out she supported legislation that if a Master of the City went crazy and had to be assassinated, the remaining Masters were to be given a chance.)

5. It tied up a hell of a lot of loose threads. Some of which were painfully obvious - like Haven and the fate of the Mother of all Darkness - and some of which you didn't even realize had been hanging.

6. The sex was heavier on the side of Anita's sweeties, as opposed to strangers.

7. There was a resolution of sorts with respect to some of the moodier guys in Anita's life - Asher, Richard, and Haven.

8. We got more information on the Vampire Council and the various lines. Which I personally find fascinating.

9. There is progress in the consolidation of power among Anita's two triumverates.

10. Most of the extra guys Anita has bonded with - like Crispen, Domino, and Nicky - have fallen into a close but not too close role. They aren't constantly demanding more, like say Requiem, who apparently did move out of town, although he's never mentioned explicitly.

I think that covers everything I can say without dipping into spoilers. A spoiler rich review may follow.

Can't recommend enough. *g*

[Niko Llewyn · Rating 2 out of 5]

Same ole Anita, which means butt loads of gratuitous metaphysical nookie. Not enough of a cohesive action based plot to be Urban Fantasy. Way too much whining, repetitive dialogue about emotions ( My gawd, I've never read so many gag worthy conversations about FEELINGS as in this series. Everyone just can't freaking shut up about their FEELINGS lmao). And not strongly written enough to classify as "good".

But the anita-verse is as thrilling, sexy, and addictive as crack as ever. And much like crack it's killing me slowly to continue "using", but I can't seem to stop myself.

[Ruby · Rating 1 out of 5]

Please, LKH, for the love of God, give us an Anita Blake installment where the sex to plot ratio isn't 1000:1. Less fucking, more plot, and PLEASE STOP TALKING ABOUT EVERYONE'S FEELINGS.

[Lorena · Rating 1 out of 5]

Recommended only for those whose doctors have prescribed a daily session of eye-rolling to increase eye mobility. There really isn't anything to say about this book, because nothing really happens. All semblance of plotting has been entirely overthrown so that Laurell - whoops, I mean "Anita" - can think about and talk about and have group sex for pretty much the entire book. And even that would have value as titillation if there were more "having" than "thinking about and talking about." But there is not. It's like hanging out with that friend who just got into therapy, and thinks everyone else is as fascinated as she is with examining every detail of her life under a microscope, or that guy who just found religion and now works it into every conversation, trying to convert you. In other words, tiresome. Repetitive. Nowhere near as clever/deep as it thinks it is. Constantly presenting stuff most people figured out years ago as new, shocking, and original. If there IS one thing to say about this book it would be "God, shut UP, Anita." Repeat at least once per page. And roll your eyes.

[Mandi · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow.Laurell K. Hamilton came back swinging hard with this book. A book that's finally set in St. Louis with all of our favourites. Jean-Claude, Asher, Nathaniel, Micah, Jason and Richard! Yup even Richard and like LKH mentioned he is back to his old self. The therapist he's seen really did something great for him. He's there for the triumvirate and he's even more swoonish then he was. I can totally understand why Laurell and Anita would both be so hesitant to trust him again. Every page is thrilling, every word eggs you to keep reading, even if it's nearly 3 am and you have to work early in the morning. The novel is so totally worth being sleep deprived.

It was entertaining to watch Laurell K. Hamilton tweet about the books and the death that she mentioned, it was epic. Someone who you least expected to die, died and in a shocking way. After reading that scene i understand why it was so hard to get back. The scene after is heart-breaking numbing and it might take a few reads to full understand the magnitude of just how much that person meant to Anita. With the Marmee Noir on her back it's also adds a twist to it all.

All in all this book really was a great read and it was worth waiting two books to get to where Anita is now. It was also great to see Anita further her knowledge about her powers and just what she can do. Definitely worth the wait. Amazing Laurell!

[Wicked Lil Pixie (Natasha) · Rating 4 out of 5]

The main storyline surrounds Anita, the triumvirate, her animals to call & an unexpected reunion with the Mother of All Darkness who everyone thought was dead. Because of the return of the Mother of All Darkness, Anita must come to terms with all the men surrounding her & try to complete the cats she calls. On top of it, Richard comes back & Anita doesn’t know if she can trust him again. Then we have an appearance by Haven & he is demanding Anita’s love, it’s all or nothing for Haven.

For you Anita fans, there is lots of Jean-Claude, Asher, Nathaniel & Richard time! Let me tell you, Richard really grows up in this book & Asher is still my absolute favorite. Micah is around but not as prominent as in other books in the series. There are new females introduced, which we haven’t really seen before in an Anita book, so we get to see how Anita interacts with new females. It also has a really dark & disturbing moment with child vampire Valentina, which totally creeped me out. She has to be the scariest vampire in any book I’ve read, children always scare me worse than anything but Valentina is just horrid.

Of course it wouldn’t be an Anita book without some hot romance scenes, I kid you not LKH is the only author that makes me squirm when I read her sex scenes. It got all sorts of hot at some points! *grabs a cold cloth*

What I found with Bullet was that it ties up a lot of loose information, from Asher & Jean-Claude to Richard and his issues. It’s closure for the old drama & setting up for a huge battle(s) in book 20 of the series. It also is a book of growth for Anita, she goes through some very bad experiences & has to either move on with her life or just breakdown. There’s completion & new openings, so you know book 20 is going to be something huge!

Thankfully Laurell K. Hamilton is currently writing book 20 in the series, so the wait isn’t going to be too long! Long time fans of the series will like Bullet, but book 20 is the one we’ll all be waiting for.

[Kevin · Rating 1 out of 5]

First, beyond anything else, Ms. Hamilton needs an editor. Tortured prose, dangling plot threads, indeterminate pronouns, etc.

**SPOILERS**

So, the big Mother of All Night comes back, everyone worries about it, f**ks about it, TALKS about it for several HUNDRED pages, and what it really comes down to is Anita screwing a few tigers of a different color at one of those dreary vampire cocktail parties with all the boots and bare chests, and complete and utter lack of anything remotely resembling personal boundaries, or even personality, and that's it. Mamma Darkness on the run, the Harlequin appeased, and the American Masters roll over, the end. (Wait: Baby Matthew. Awwwww. Or, more accurately, Ewwww. Let us avoid discussing Baby Matt's disturbing precocity, shall we?)

Anita has the most deadly amazing vajayjay since "Liquid Sky." She doesn't even have to get out of bed to destroy evil, since the power of her lady parts draws all who would fight the powers of darkness directly to her. We never even see any more of St. Louis than the inside of her bedrooms anymore. All of the action, such as it is, takes place en suite.

Ms. Hamilton isn't even trying to throw the thinnest of veils across the fact that ALL of her characters are simply extensions of Anita's Omnipotent Punani. Notice how no one actually does anything of any note outside of Anita's immediate vicinity, usually with skin-to-skin contact. Are the other vamps and weres powerful? I dunno. I hear that they are, but all they ever do is feed Anita's powers. {Jan Brady voice: "Anita! Anita! Anita!} That scene where literally EVERYone ended up in her bed fighting off Belle and Padma was a perfect representation of what the entire series has become: Anita and the Preternatural Pseudopods. The only character that acts with any personal autonomy (Haven, who IS a bastard) gets his brains blown out, and poor Richard nearly buys it for daring to step outside the Circus for 10 minutes for a lousy date (fortunately, he is rescued by the Amazing Voracious Supersnatch, long distance). It appears that we are working through some serious abandonment issues here, which, alas, is boring.

Also, I'm freaking sick to death of all the hairography. I wonder if she has actually seen anyone with hair "down to their ankles?" It ain't pretty. In fact, it's actually kinda gross. Remember Crystal Gale? She used to sit on her hair when she appeared on chat shows, which was definitely a thing that made me go, "Ick." I suppose that all her weres and vamps (like Merry's Fairies) have preternatural powers of shine, body and bounce, because otherwise, that shit is naAASty.

This was the last one for me, at last. I entertained some small hope after "Skin Trade," but "Flirt" and "Bullet" have mercilessly quashed that hope. Hope that once sang and surged through my veins, rising, cresting with the taste of blood and musk, quivering on the tips of my turgid, tumescent taste buds, awaiting just the barest trace of the scent of a plot to fulfill it, to fulfil me, as that taste of hope burst from my tongue as husky, duskily glorious song, only to be extinguished by the soul- and tongue-withering disappointment of an empty story, sadly lost and never found. Only cerements and ashes. Ashes and hair lay dead upon my dry, distended, thrice-bitten unhappy toungue.

I'm out.

[Nicole · Rating 2 out of 5]

Good things:

* Richard (the most annoying man on the planet and in a world with Asher that says something) quit being so angry and whiny. But LKH never delved into why. In a book that details how to wash out a cup after drinking a protein shake, you'd think something this big would get some ink.

* The video from the rotter massacre in Atlanta was actually interesting. Too bad all the resolution happened off screen while we got to read about Anita's wardrobe.

* JC was actually in this book. He was completely whipped and a shell of the man a lot of us fans fell hard for, but he was present.

The Rest:

What can I say... no Edward, barely any plot, another woke up looked at all the naked people and didn't know what happened scene, no London ... *sigh*.

I really want executioner-animator Anita to be the MC of a book; not some whiny, self-obsessed, not-kicking-ass girl who spends too much time thinking about her breasts "yummy mounded goodness" *groan* and employing her magical vagina as often as possible.

I'm not a prude and I was a huge fan of the first books. This was just so plot-thin by comparison.

The thing I hated most was all the "showing" LKH wrote went to the sex and the talking about feelings but for the plot she used "telling" and ruined the little bit there was. A few pages away from the end of the book I was excitedly thinking, Wow! how are they going to pull this out of the fire? Something very big must happen (or maybe this is just a set-up for the next book). Nope. Instead we got what amounted to a shy two pages of,

Jake hunted Padma!

Richard killed his attackers and cried!

(You know what would have been awesome? If Edward showed up with his bags of destruction and he and Anita take off on an around the world man-hunt. That's a book I'd be marking my calendar to read the next installment of.)

The writing was beyond repetitive, both of this book and the ones that came before, and it had cheap amateur scenes like the opening chapter at the dance where they describe each person. Ugh. (As an aside, who has multi-age dance recitals with two year olds and wereanimal strippers in a school?).

Someone please take away all sharp objects if I ever have to read any variation of "poured into painted on leather pants", "wet but tight", "couldn't make sense of it because your mind wants to spare you from what your eyes are seeing" etc. ever again.

Why do I keep reading?

I love the world and I love who the characters used to be.

This book was just another in a long list of Anita Blake novels that sully a good thing and turn characters into cardboard.

[Lindsey Simard Toutant · Rating 5 out of 5]

*Warning: This novel has a high volume of sexual content and this novel and my review may not be appropriate for young readers. Read at your own risk!*


Before I get to my review I would like a moment to gush and tell you that throughout this novel I had to repeatedly put this novel down and fan myself before I spontaniously combusted. When I finished the novel and my husband asked what I though about it I was momentarily speechless. This novel is very, very naughty and very, very, very delicious....


Onto my review!


I have had the pleasure of reading the Anita Blake Vampire Hunter Series for more years then I can remember and she is one of the few authors who's characters have become like old friends. Some protagonists I am able to identify with because I see myself in them but I don't see myself in Anita; for me that is what is so thrilling about her as a character. While reading an Anita Blake novel you can escape to another exciting world where all the dark desires you have and those you didn't even know you have can be explored.


In the beginning of the series there was more of a focus on Anita as a necromancer, the solving of a paranormal crime, and the development of her romantic life. As many readers of Hamilton know, throughout the series the level of sexual content has increased dramatically which has had mixed reviews. At times I have felt that the sexual content has overshadowed the main plot of her novels but despite this I am never disappointed because Hamilton writes erotic sex scenes better then anyone else I have ever read.


The newest addition to this Anita Blake Series, Bullet had the best balance of sexual content and paranormal plot lines that I have read in this series to date. Readers be aware that Hamilton takes Anita's sexcapades to a whole new level of eroticism. While reading the sex scenes in this novel I felt like a naughty voyeur and many times I felt myself blushing. Much of the reason for this progression seems to be because Anita has become more accepting and comfortable with the Ardeur, the men her life, and her own needs. The level of sexual content is also necessary because Anita gains power for herself and her people through sex and with the unexpected return of The Mother Of All Darkness Anita, her loved ones, and the entire population of humans and paranormal people alike will need Anita and those she is connected with to be at their most powerful if they have any hope of defeating her.


This book also delves back into the history of vampire and shifter lore and further explores the politics of the paranormal world Anita lives in. The characters I have come to love are spotlighted well throughout the novel and an old romantic love of Anita's that I had all but written off makes a surprising comeback. New characters are introduced that I was at first apprehensive about but surprisingly I feel that they help to complete an already large family unit and I can't wait to see their characters develop in future books.


This book was tantalizing, suspenseful, erotic, and very well written. Hamilton's ability to describe scenes in such vivid detail allow me to see into her world better then any other author I have ever read in the paranormal urban fantasy genre. This novel exceeded my expectations by engaging me from beginning to end and I expect that future novels in this series will do the same.


If ever we create a personalized virtual reality system I know the first place I am going to visit ;) Hello Nethaniel, Jason, Jean-Claude, Asher, and Micah...which way to the bedroom?

[Danielle · Rating 2 out of 5]

Don't let Skin Trade fool ya folks! LKH didn't seem to actually realize that there was too much f...ahem, fluff, and not enough (non sexual) action.

My favourite books are the Edward ones, followed by the original Wereanimal ones. So that pretty much sums up how i feel about them swanning around the circus not doing much (except each other).

After Anita killed someone and spent a good chapter angst it out, i thought she would jump on the chance to get out there, be a big bad Marshall and go take down the rotter in Atlanta. When she was sent the video/ Surely that seals the deal, so kick some vampire but!

But no, she had a party to attend with some weretigers! *facedesk* I don't care how good a party it was, our Anita is gone. She has been totally rolled.

Also, i am sick to the back teeth of "poured on" and "painted on" leather. Now, I'm as partial to the idea of beautiful sexually ambiguous men in leather as the next woman, but jesus christ you really do not need to write a new costume for each character every scene, especially when they always wear the same sort of thing. You end up with drivel like "He was wearing leather that looked poured on with knee high boots...I liked him when he wore nothing but the knee high leather boots...even without the knee high leather boots those painted on leather trousers..." blah blah. We get it. JC wears leather, and likes everyone else to as well. So they do at his house and his parties. The End.

I am also very over Asher. I was actually excited when he threatened to leave. Get your whiney attitude and leave. Just don't take Narcissus because he is super interesting, and if LKH ever writes something with him in again we may be saved.

It feels like even the sex in these books has devolved into ego stroking. If you have like, 20 million plus men (and now apparently, women) waiting to sleep with you, and you are in love with a good what, 5+ of them? If someone needs 5 pages of being told they are beautiful and reassurance that you want to sleep with them, they ain't worth it!

I also didn't like that anything interesting that DID happen actually happened off page. Richards big emotional U Turn for one. Um, hello! Where did you come from? Others were brushed away with barely a sentence - "Oh yeah, Richard had to hunt and kill some guys and he cried so that's cool now". Sorry, but that's the stuff i DO want.

The only other scene that disappointed me was when all the females squared off against Haven. Finally, i thought Anita would have some female friends, some female perspective. No, that was brushed away pretty fast.

It was entertaining enough in its own smutty way, but seriously LKH, get her away from the boys. Get her out there being a Marshall.

[Stacey · Rating 1 out of 5]

Crash...and....burn.

R.I.P. awesome kick butt Anita that I fell in love with all those years ago.

I remember a day when the thought of no more AB books made me VERY sad. I devoured them often in one night, and waited in anticipation for the next book. Now I can honestly say I'd rather have had LHK stop 6-7 books ago and end the series abruptly then have it come to this...this....thing it has become.

I have continued to read the series (if you want to call it read, it's more of a skim) over the last few years because I really did fall in love with a few of the characters. I wish to God that I hadn't read this book however, because in it is the complete destruction of everything that made this series so great. I may be overly dramatic, but honestly, LKH, you had a good thing going and you just ruined it. I have no doubt that you can be a talented writer, there is proof of that in the page turners you once dished out. But for the sake of all that was good about this series, just end it, please? PLEASE?

[Dani · Rating 1 out of 5]

Up to and including Obsidian Butterfly, the Anita Blake series was hands down one of the best series I've ever read. Since then, however, this series is just one big disappointment....yet I keep reading them, hoping, wishing, that one day Laurell K. Hamilton will bring the real Anita back.

Bullet was, well, ridiculous. Whine, whine, whine about killing someone (ummm...Anita kills for a living). Talk and/or think everything (and nothing) to death. No action (unless in the bedroom, of course, which at this point has become tedious to read).

On page 356 of 356 the book says "I'm a U.S. Marshal, a legal vampire executioner, and I raise the dead for a living." What?... When?... Where?... The police need her help, she tells them to send her a video of the crime scene..really? The really bad vampire guy is on the loose....she tells them (over the phone) to get dogs to chase him...what? Raises the dead?? Dead men's penises maybe.

These books have become self indulgent on the author's part. I think LKH sees herself as Anita, bringing in her own BDSM fetishes and leaving Anita out of the books entirely. Huge thumbs down. I may borrow future installments, but I won't be spending anymore money on her books.

[Linda · Rating 1 out of 5]

I am on chapter 22 and it is so ----- I cannot find the words to describe how boring this book
is. First of all Anita Blake - formally known as the Slayer of Vampires has turned into the Slut who has to sleep with pretty much any thing that breath's or undead and furry. What happened to the lady who kicks butt and takes names ? Please bring back the real Vampire Slayer !

[Amy Imogene Reads]

Spoilers: This one is a “tying-up-loose-ends” novel that sets up the next big bang. No real action plot but a lot of important bits covered. I don’t know how else to put that. It’s really good, but it’s wrapping up and setting up at the same time.

Wrapping up: Haven as a character—he was a problem, he got worse and almost killed Nathaniel, Anita killed him and it was traumatizing. Richard wraps up his problematic personality—he went to therapy, Anita had eaten his anger a while back, and now he’s ready to play and does so in a BIG way with a sexy bondage scene involving Asher, Jean Claude, and Anita. Asher wraps up because he was still held at arms length by JC—he forces the issue and gets his wish, Anita and JC realize that JC can be with Asher. Anita also wraps up some of her issues—specifically, her odd homophobia with MM action and her “no one can have my lovers” mentality. This is fixed bc of the Asher/JC moment and then also through the golden tigers binding which sees JC and Richard sleep with Envy (female weretiger) and Anita is fine with it.

Setting up: Mistress of Tigers. Lots of tiger politics, Anita holds golden tiger, Anita needs to master all the tigers so she can hold enough power to defeat the Mother of All Darkness because SURPRISE, the Mother isn’t dead she’s actually possessed some of the European vampire council. This novel sets up the fact that Richard, Anita, and JC need to make JC leading vampire of all the US master vampires to amass power against the corrupt Europe faction. This novel also sets up Anita’s opening to FF relationships to come—Jade is here, a black weretiger with a cruel Harlequin master whom Anita frees her from via sex.

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[Tiffany Danner · Rating 1 out of 5]

This only gets 1 star as I can't actually give it a 0.

Sigh. There once was a series about a vampire executioner/necromancer that kicked ass. Anita Blake was her name and she rocked my urban fantasy world. She kicked ass, took names, and didn't care that she was wearing outdated/out-of-fashion clothing while she did it. She didn't need stiletto heels or mid drift bearing leather vests. She wasn't swayed into stupidity by the likes of hot men and out of the world orgasms.

Where oh where has our Anita gone to? She certainly isn't being written by Laurel K. Hamilton anymore. Now before anyone says "oh you are just one of those who like to complain about all the sex".... no, I'm not. I like sex in books.... in fact sometimes i LOVE it. What I don't like is sex to the point that it has no relevance to the plot, or worse, sex instead of a plot. I've never been a complainer when it comes to Hamilton, other than what she did to poor Richard... I didn't hate the ardeur or complain about the harem of men until I started losing track of who was who. I even kind of liked Blood Noir and Skin Trade... had hopes that maybe the Anita I loved was making her way back.

Unfortunately, Bullet is exactly as it is titled, a bullet into the coffin of the Anita Blake series for this reader.

Now here I could try to sum up what was going on in this book and put it into neat paragraphs... but I have put enough time into this one. Instead I am just going to give you a nice neat bulleted list (heh, pun intended) of my complaints and notes.
***The phrase "creamy goodness" should never be used more than once in a book, much less two times or more and when talking about one's own breasts
***"too tall for straight missionary, or I was too short" was used more than once... relatively close together about entirely different men. Furthermore.... eh what? I want details in a sex scene but can they please be better than random thoughts like this?
***More than once I noted a big W-T-F is going on? There is all kinds of strange metaphysical triumvirate crap going on and most of the time it doesn't make sense. If there are rules to the supernatural world Anita lives in now that she is ever-powerful, I can't figure them out and I don't like it. I don't buy the weird magic touching mojo just works without rules or reasoning, giving Anita and gang the power to fix anything. Additionally, how many new powers does Anita have now and can someone get me a chart?
***Pages and pages and pages of description. Not just any description... but description of guys' hair color, eyes, clothing, and shoes. It was endless... if the guys were not always wearing knee high boots we probably would have gotten description of their sock color... surely all varying colors of blue (cue *eyeroll*). Oh and it was not just Anita's main squeezes that we were treated to unnecessary man drooling, it was every guy she lays eyes on. Bullet could have been at least 50 pages lighter if an editor would have done their job and not allowed her to bore us with Hamilton's game of "how many different kinds of blue eyes can I shove in a book and how long can I write about them."
***On the note of clothing... WHY does every man in the book have pants that were "painted on"? Really? I lost count of how many times Hamilton was painting pants on men.
***Boring, emotional, relationship drivel. Pages and pages of talking whether it be among the characters or within Anita's head. Every scene was like one of those bad fights you had with your high school sweetheart where you both kept going long after everything was said and you found yourself talking in circles.... except in Bullet every one of those scenes involved 3 more more guys making them excruciatingly long. Sigh. I enjoy a good turbulent relationship but at some point in the book there must be a plot right? I mean something has to happen outside of the bedroom right?
***Rainbow of Tigers... they are confusing and totally weird. That is all.
***Poorly written sentences and paragraphs. Unnecessary details that only make my brain go into zombie mode... such as:

Nathaniel had made me drink a Powerade from the cooler near the locker rooms, but he’d also insisted on stopping at the kitchen so he could make me a protein shake. They were designed to replace things a hard workout would take out of you, and the interesting thing was if you didn’t need the shake, it tasted bad, but if your body needed it, chocolate tasted like chocolate. It tasted very good today.

***Richard... sigh. My dear Richard. I want Richard to stop whining and being a pansy as much as the next girl. When forced to choose between a creepy old vamp (Jean Claude) and an uber hot alpha werewolf (Richard) I am always going to side with the warm blooded non-creepy one. Well, I got my wish in this book.... but I am sad to say it was disappointing. Not because unwhiny Richard wasn't what I thought.... oh no.. Richard accepting the things he wants is totally SEXY. The problem is that the turnaround is completely unrealistic and poorly done. It is done without set up or any believable back story. A fellow blogger described it perfectly, it seems that Hamilton just got tired of writing him as a pain in the ass and decided to stop doing it.
***Sex scenes.... for those who complain about the frequent sex in the later books...Bullet was a nice inbetween. It wasn't overwhelming and it wasn't sparse.... but it was BORING. Uninspired and lacking chemistry or sizzle of any kind. I am going to blame it on all the talking during, before, and after.
***Anita getting it on with the girls. Hey, I am all about Anita getting a little help taking care of her harem... its large, she needs it. Yet when Anita actually gets some sexual mojo going with one of the girls underneath her Hamilton wimps out on committing to it. The girl is left to get off on her own by rubbing up against Anita's stomach? Really? Either dive in or get out of the pool.
***Plot..... where the hell is it? Other than a dance recital at the beginning of the book, Bullet takes place entirely in the Circus of the Damned.... much of it in the bedroom. AND THERE ISN'T EVEN A LOT OF SEX! There is definitely sex... but not enough for most of the book to take place underground in a bedroom. We get glimpses of cool things Anita could be doing (vampires running amock everywhere!) but we never actually get the action! Even the end reads like "here are all the traditional urban fantasy things that happened when we weren't having sex or talking about our feelings, but I didn't feel like writing them into the story so let me just tell you how it ended."
***No Edward. Do I need to say more?


Now, I could go on.... but really, who is still reading at this point? My words can not express how bad I think this book is. And honestly, its a pretty harsh review already. I probably harbor an unhealthy amount of anger in regards to Bullet. Hamilton used to write better than this... and where is her editor? Are you telling me that no one at her publisher read this and questioned anything? Or is it no longer about writing a good story but instead about just meeting a deadline so it hits shelves on time? If so, its shameful... readers spend hard earned money on these books and deserve better than this. When you are the author of a long running, popular series, you have a higher level of responsibility. Your fans trust you, they buy your books on faith. If you can no longer deliver a book of at least mediocre quality writing then do yourself, your fans, and your characters a favor. Stop.

With that, I say good-buy to Anita Blake. Anita, Richard, Jason.... I have loved you and you helped me escape from my crazy so-called life many many nights. I will miss you but I am afraid I no longer care what happens unless it involves Edward coming in and and going on a mass killing rampage complete with Anita/Edward showdown. I am going to try to appreciate Bullet for what it did give me - sexy alpha Richard and series closure.

[CEGatling · Rating 1 out of 5]

LKH you've done it again. Another AB book with no plot, no resolution but oooh gobs of pointless sex of all varieties this time. Hey, but at least you're branching out. I keep picking up these books hoping the Anita of Obsidian Butterfly will come back. LKH never fails to disappoint.

Bullet actually starts out fairly well. There is the requisite vanilla opening in which all the main chars are in play. Anita is annoyed with someone and we get to "see" Nathaniel and Jason dance (do NOT get me started on the physics of Nathaniel's naturally vanilla scented, ankle-legnth hair that he can some how get into a bun on the back of his head so he can dance, please just don't). We meet some old characters and get wind of their issues and then go back to the underground and get ready to comfort a pouting vampire when what we THINK might be a plot begins!

Richard bursts in exclaiming that all his therapy has worked and he's ready to take his place in the triumvirate without being angsty because the were-hyenas (under the leadership Asher's animal to call, Narcissus, the were-hyena king) are getting ready to stage a coup and he knows if they leave town Jean-Claude's power base will be wrecked. Of course this takes a good 5 or 6 chapters to explain because Anita has to think stuff and then say it and someone else has to say it again for her and then there is all that used-to-be-but-is-all-better-now-angst that is going on. Oh and Asher is having a temper fit, but we are used to that.

Then they go off make Asher happy and...No one mentions the were-hyenas again. Ever. In the entire book.

Yeah. That's when what could have been a plot crashes into a brick wall because LKH's god-moding Mary Sue took over and we go downhill from there.

There were of course some serious writing gaffes just like in the last few books since "Micah". I'm still trying to figure out where LKH's editor is. I have some specifics I want to drag kicking and screaming into the light. Let's see...

1. You would think an author might be able to find another word. In this book, as in all the others, LKH looooves spillage: Hair spills, kisses spill, magic spills, power spills, people spill. They spill out, over, along, into, around, down, through...Pick a preposition and something spilled in that general direction.

2. She does have a new favorite descriptive phrase: "creamy goodness". "All that creamy goodness", "I saw my own creamy goodness". Anita is really entranced by her own breasts which are apparently the color of cream and also good. Once was creative. Twice was eye-rolling. The next few times made me want to scream. On occasion Anita used "goodness" to describe one of the many men of her harem. He wasn't creamy though.

3. Power, I think, does many things, but around Anita, it breathes. Especially in a warm rush over her skin as it spills into, over and around everyone within a five foot radius of Anita.

4. And please explain why it's entitled "Bullet"? Oy...

No I didn't HAVE to read this book, but I used to really LIKE Anita. In Obsidian Butterfly, she was hot, focused and a stone cold vampire killer. Now she is just a parody of herself. It's not just the rampant sex, I can deal with that. It's the non-plot, bad dialogue and the fact that Anita doesn't do her real job anymore. She's a US Marshal for pete's sake!! She's a professional vampire hunter. She's supposed to be one of the best out there at hunting and killing the monsters.

Now all she does is sleep with them. She's acquiring all these abilities from the were-animals and vampires but all she does with the ability is make the animals and vamps into part of her harem. ~sigh~

LKH, you are boring your readers, and that is a cardinal sin according to Larry Nivens. At least I didn't buy the thing.

[Jennifer Wardrip · Rating 1 out of 5]

I've been thinking for several days as to how I should review this book. I'm not an LKH-basher, even though I've been pretty tough on several of the last published novels. But in the end, I just have to go with how I feel.

Truth: I gagged my way through the first three chapters of BULLET, skimmed through a few more, and finally gave up. Some may say that reading only a few chapters of a book makes me incapable of writing a review, but I beg to differ. Let's begin....

The first chapter starts with Anita doing a favor for someone we've never heard of before. Said someone doesn't like Anita, Anita doesn't like her, and the only thing bringing them together is the need for a little boy's costume hat. Could have worked, except said five-year-old little boy wants to kiss Anita on the lips, like "all of the big boys do." The point? Even a little kid knows Anita is a whore. I apologize for the rough language, but please, let's call a spade a spade. It's gotten to the point where even CHILDREN in this series recognize that Anita Blake is nothing but a sex machine.

When the entire "ardeur" thing began, I went with it. I even understood the concept and reasoning behind it. But face it people - we've moved beyond Anita needing sex for power. She's now nothing more than a walking vagina. Anita Blake has sex because there's absolutely nothing else for her to do with ANY of the characters in this series! I've never met a character with such sex appeal. However Anita's doing it - making every single male and female (living or undead), want to have sex with her - she needs to bottle that up and sell it for a profit. She could not only have a "puppy pile," she could BUY a damn kennel!

And the sex? Puhleeease. Richard getting it on with Asher? Hello? Is this the same Richard who two books ago couldn't even stand to see Anita look at another guy, never mind know that she would no doubt end up having sex with them? I'm all for the male-male sex scene when the story calls for it, but there is no way in h-e-double-hockey-sticks that the REAL Richard would ever bring his naked body anywhere NEAR that of the scarred but deeply emotional Asher.

I could go on, but is there really a point? You're probably asking yourself why, if I'm so disgusted with the series, I continue to read it. And you would have a wonderful point, one that I've finally taken to heart. I WON'T be reading this series any longer. I've spent too much time waiting for it to get better - to be as good as the first four or five books - and realize now that my wait is pointless. It's not going to get better, ladies and gents. The downhill slide started a long time ago, and there is no hope for redemption as long as LKH continues to live out her Mary Sue fantasies through Anita Blake.

So, au revoir, Anita. It's been one heck of a ride, but this reader has finally come to her senses. After all, there are too many other decent books out there just waiting for me to read them. And just about anything else has got to be better than this.

[Leslie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Wow. For some reason, after reading "Skin Trade" I was under the impression that future Anita Blake books would be heavy on the plot, mystery, action, and less on the sex.

Boy, was I wrong. In Bullet, there wasn't really a story. It felt like the whole book, was just a set-up for some big event to happen in the next book. The charaters really don't go anywhere. At the begining there is a dance program, that most of the charaters attend, and where some of
Anita's sweets even dance. But after that, every scene takes place in Jean-Claude's underground cave home.
Which got more than alittle boring.

Before I started the book, I became aware that Laurell K. Hamilton had written on her blog, that one of the charaters was going to die. She wrote that she tried her best to save him/her but in the end, they had to die. Killing off this character make her depresssed that she had to find a love one to hug, because she was so sad.
Now, this scared me. I tried to guess who it might be. Was it Richard?, Asher, Micha?
I won't spill the beans, but lets just say, I didn't lose any sleep or need a hug, after I found out who died.

In Skin Trade, there was still sex, but nothing to over the top, in fact alot of the sex came in flash backs. No real details.

Well, let me tell you, that is not the case in Bullet. Think sex w/Auggie from Danse Macabre, times that by, I don't know....10 and you get just ONE of the sex scenes in this book.

One thing that was a surprise (which it shouldn't have been) to me was that all of Anita's sweeties are not only doing her, but now they are doing each other. (Something about a gag reflex). Hey, whats a blow job amoung friends? Anal Sex, great! We wouldn't want anyone to get their feeling s hurt, right? The book made it seem like that in every hetrosexual male, there is a (in the right circumstance) bisexual man just waiting to come out and blow anyone and everyone.

I'm not going to play all OMGosh, I can't belive they did that. When you read an Anita Blake book, (at least lately) you know that there is going to be sex. But the sex in this book seems a little pushed. Like she's grabbing for anything just to keep the SHOCK FACTOR going. M/M, F/F, BDSM, you name it, its in there. I just find it strange that Anita says she is so uncomfortable one minute, then she is doing some girl while a guy is doing her, in the living room while lots and lots of people are just trying to have a meet and greet.

OH well......... Let me tell you this, You will not be able to get "Bullet" out of your head for awhile after you read it,

[Dichotomy Girl · Rating 2 out of 5]

When I first found the Anita Blake books, I was first intrigued, then impressed, then amazed, then enthralled, than slightly co-dependent, than sad, than disgusted, and finally done.

Like an empowered woman I walked away from Anita Blake after an 18 book relationship. For 3 years, I never one regretted this decisions. Oh sure, from time to time I'd hear rumors that Anita hadn't even begun to hit rock bottom, but I lived in happy ignorance. Until the day that I saw Bullet sitting on my e-libraries "Recently Returned" shelf. Without thinking, I clicked "Borrow" saying to myself "It doesn't mean I'll actually read it".

When I started it, I found it hilariously bad. It actually took 100 pages to introduce Anita's many loves / sex partners. It had a big giant Orgy. Richard came back, complete with a personality-transplant. I mean who could take this seriously?

I meant to stop reading then, but could I really stand not knowing if Anita would ever have control of ALL the Tigers? How would she handle naughty Lion Rex Haven? Would she ever actually let one of the men she loved touch another woman. Would she ever lose her lesbiphobia? (Actually a real word, huh) And what about (insert random vampire politics here)?

Do I really care about any of that? No. Did I continue reading? Yes. I even strangely enjoyed it, and am now filled with self-loathing.

To anyone else who has blessedly never discovered this series. If you are weak...run away! If you are strong, go ahead and read the first 10 books, then add "And Anita lived happily ever after" and for all that is holy, stop there!

To the author: read Jacqueline Carey's Kushiel's Dart trilogy, for an example of how to correctly write a story of a woman as a sexual being who may have multiple loves/lovers.

[Shannon · Rating 1 out of 5]

I never wrote a review for this one, even though I meant to. I moved across the country right after I finished this, and even though I kept notes, I've just never gotten around to writing a proper review. Please read my status updates if you're curious why I gave this 1 star. I sometimes find it hard to properly convey my absolute RAGE with this series, but my knee-jerk reactions to various passages are pretty accurate portrayals of my overall feelings. I can't help but think I'm doing my friends a disservice by not writing a full review of this one, but please, please, PLEASE, don't spend money on these books anymore. The only way LKH will ever realize that her books are shit is if people stop buying them.

Against my better judgement, I also read the book after this one. Here's my review of Hit List, as well as my review for the previous book, Flirt.

[Bec · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is a review of the whole series, because I can't remember all the books individually, especially the last, say 12, as they became a mass of twisted sweaty and occasionally furry limbs.

This series starts out strong, Anita Blake is a tough talking ass-kicking necromancer. She raises zombies for a living, mostly to settle wills, and give evidence in trails etc. Cool idea, really. She's magic, she's talented, so talented and magic, of course she's the best but hasn't realised it yet, as is typical to PNR.

She's also tough. How tough? UBERtough! She's a tiny little thing, but as a state licenced vampire executioner she uses her tininess to bring down big strong fast vamps. She's also a crack shot.
The first few books in the series centre around her zombie raising which is great. There's a 'Master of the City' vamp, Jean Claude for us to drool over who is of course infatuated with the disinterested Anita, who has a thing for werewolf Richard. This is all good. There is no sex, just great tension that has you wishing she'd make up her mind, get over her sexual hangups and jump one of them.

Then she does.

From there it all goes to hell.

I've read this whole series and I'm still waiting for a decent storyline to come back. Now I love a good sex scene as much as the next girl, but there needs to be more than 2 pages in between.

By being with Jean Claude Anita acquires a form of his 'ardeur' that must be fed several times a day, by different men or they get too drained, and not by Jean Claude because he has his own to feed. Okay fine, so get a couple of guys and make happy a few times a day. Before breakfast, lunch time, maybe before dinner and at bed time. I could handle that. But NO! Anita has so many sexual hangups she can't accept these changes and instead ignores it until it she becomes so ravenous (is that the word I want here?) she practically rapes 3-4 guys to get the required energy fix. She's like an unmanaged diabetic. And who really stops in the middle of sex to have a theological discussion? (Meredith Gentry & her merry men excluded)

She's also a leach. Look out men of power, be you a master vamp, alpha werewolf, leopard, lion or tiger once Anita Blake has her nasty little hooks in you she'll bleed your powers dry. Or just copy & multiply your power so she is UBERwere-succubus necromancer legend who can't change forms, because again she can't make a decision or accept any change to save her life.

Please Laurell, you're killing me here! bring back decent plots of evil zombie-raising voodoo priests and serial killing zombies!

[Julia · Rating 1 out of 5]

Gosh I wish there was a plot to this book...
Since there was so little going on I will use this review to note the issues that just seem to keep coming up:
1. Anita angsting over all the men - Can I just say that when she could avoid having to feed the ardeur as much by having a fucking cheeseburger she SHOULD feel like a whore.
2. As someone who loved the first few books when there was less sex and more story I have to say that I am mad at how little there is of Jean-Claude as the books go on. I keep reading hoping that he will reappear, but when he finally does Anita is ok with him fucking another woman...um ok.
3. Asher and Jean-Claude not having sex when Anita is not there was already addressed several books ago, so having LKH bring it back to be a point of conflict is simply lazy.
4. It started at a child's recital which for some reason had highschoolers dancing with exotic dancers/strippers...is it just me or would those girls' parents not have objected quite strongly about their young daughters dancing with not only older men, but were-animal strippers. Really!?!? I can only suspend so much disbelief before this book just turns ridiculous.
5. They don't ever seem to leave the Circus...I can only take so much sex with characters I really cannot care about before even an orgy bores me. I am all for a good sex scene, but Anita needs to cork her vagina. I honestly wish it was just her and Jean-Claude again - there are too many men and I really think Anita says it best when she says when there are too many she can't give them much of her affections and LKH needs to listen because as a reader there are too many men and I just stop caring.

[Alisa Kester · Rating 1 out of 5]

Fifteen pages of "my men are so so so gorgeous and everyone is jealous of me" lead into about forty pages of bad relationship talking. "I don't understand my feeeeelings...gorgeous men, explain me to me!" which lead into ten pages of icky sex. Then there's a little bit of plot, followed by an orgy, and more relationship chatting. Then, FINALLY, there's some actual interesting plot, followed by bad writing...and a repeat of everything above but the orgy. (Of course, I've had to change my definition of 'orgy' just for Hamilton's books. Used to be, multiple people in a bed was an orgy...now it has to be an entire ROOM of people! Gah! Well, at least Anita got some wicked sparkly power-eyes out of it!)

Actually, the bad writing was all through the book, and it isn't so much bad as simply Hamilton getting too big for her britches and refusing to let anyone edit a word of her "masterpiece". So much pointless repetition and meaningless meandering! And if she had admired her breasts one more time (referring to them as her 'creamy goodness').... *eye roll*

That said, I'll still read the next because these books have become evil crack for me and I can't stop myself. And I do still love Edward.

[Terry · Rating 1 out of 5]

"The term Mary Sue came out of media fan fiction and came from a type of story in which the protagonist is a thinly glossed version of the author who gets to interact with her favorite characters, who absolutely adore her."(cough cough Laurell K. Hamilton cough cough...)

I'm 100 pages into this book and I can't force myself to read another page. It's complete and utter crap and that's saying something because I easily & willingly fall head over heels for books at the drop of a hat. The series has been crap for years now but I kept coming back, my fingers crossed that I'll see a spark of the enjoyment I found in some of the "Old Anita".

I really do want to love these books but Hamilton is making it impossible!! This is it, I'm done. I won't finish reading Bullet and I won't pick up another Anita Blake novel. I'm sick of wasting my time on books where I get to the end of a page, only to shudder when I realize I have to re-read it because I caught myself daydreaming about more important things... the laundry, my toddlers play group, cleaning toilets, picking kids up from school....

[CJ · Rating 2 out of 5]

Yummy Goodness? Yeah, not so much.

***WARNING! SPOILERS FOLLOW!***

LKH fixed some things in this book that drastically needed attention, but the assault with the 2 by 4s continues. On the good side, she finally fixes the nauseating hypocrisy Anita blithely embraced and even defended in forbidding anyone in her harem to even *consider* getting intimate with another person, while she gets intimate with anything that has a heartbeat and several things that don't. For those of you not into M/M erotica, you will have to skip several parts of this book. Unbelievably enough, Anita actually allows someone to have sex with someone other than herself. Of course, no one in the harem gets any female action unless it's from Anita, because that would be juuuust a little too much competition.

And in the spirit of ditching prejudices and being open minded, (something LKH insists she is even though Anita displayed some serious homophobia when it came to women long after she was humping anything male in a 100 mile radius) Anita actually lip locks with a woman in this book.

I still have major problems with the Mary Sue-ing, which has long since eclipsed laughable level. Mary Sues are, by their nature, annoying, but Anita takes the cake. One peek at LKH's blog and you'll see the exact same "I'm different, badass, and scary." that Anita tries so very hard to project. Too bad LKH couldn't just slap on some rice powder, waaay too much eyeliner, get a couple interesting places pierced and parade around in black leather and Doc Martins when she was a teenager to get it out of her system. Instead she's stuck doing it now, on her blog, decades after it would have been understandable. It almost seems as if LKH doesn't realize just how much of a Mary Sue Anita has become, because Anita and every other character seem blind to the blatant inconsistencies in her psychological makeup. I would bet cold hard cash that LKH would find it almost impossible to write a male character who was not in love, in lust, or slavishly admiring of Anita. There used to be men who didn't care for her. There used to be men who were creeped out by her after she'd proven in spades that she could make a SEAL wet his pants in abject terror. Now even the 5 year old boy is all over her, which is, I'm sorry, just a little too creepy. It was obviously meant to be an opportunity for Anita to feel uncomfortable about her sexuality and then be reassured later that it's fine and dandy for her to have multiple partners, but on top of every other man falling head over genitalia in love with her, it was firmly over the line and into the creepy zone. I bet you'll never guess why Haven died? That's right, he provoked Anita to shoot him because he couldn't stand that she wasn't doing him.

I would love to see a male character introduced who is Anita's equal. Someone who has just a hint of backbone. Or even someone who's not impressed to death with her badass-ness. Someone who refuses to let her walk all over him. Anita has successfully castrated her entire harem. She pulled Jean Claude's fangs so thoroughly that even when she tells him it's okay to boff Asher, Jean Claude has to ask several times if it's *really* okay because he just can't believe his ears. If you have to beg permission after being given permission, you're so deep of a sub it's pathetic, I don't care how many super vampire powers you have. It also means your top sucks at doing her job, because as her sub you have no idea where the boundaries are.

None of her harem are even close to being her equal, let alone her better. In anything. Ever. Asher almost saved himself from the fate of being just another disposable harem hottie when he laid down his ultimatum of leaving the city rather than stick around and put up with the forced celibacy. He, alone, out of all her lap dogs, was ready to tell her
"Sorry, chickie, but this sucks and I'm out of here."
But in the end he ends up staying when she allows him to have sex with someone other than her, a major concession for her.

How refreshing would it be to have a man who A) doesn't have hair down to his ass B) doesn't fall in lust with her C) is NOT impressed with the constant reminders of how tough she is? How in the world would Anita deal with someone like that? LKH would like us to believe that Anita would be just fine with it, because she's tried hard to convince us that Anita is uneasy with her sexuality and the power she has to turn every male she meets into her willing slave. LKH has tried to make Anita's toughness something that is part and parcel of Anita's makeup rather than a 2 by 4 she smacks the reader with repeatedly trying to make her point. And when you realize that LKH would never allow any male character (or female for that matter) to be anywhere near an equal to Anita, that's where the problem becomes so annoying it almost wrecks any story LKH tells. Because no matter how you dress it up, no one likes getting smacked with a 2 by 4.

Richard used to fill that role. (And notice, he was a complete ass for not letting her walk all over him. I guess it just isn't possible for someone to disagree with Anita and not be a total jerk or have sexual hangups. He was a wonderfully drawn flawed character.) I was very torn about the Richard turnaround - it was fascinating, certainly. He had been so very blind to his shortcomings and so adamantly against even considering a different point of view that I had begun to see him as a representation of LKH herself, who insists anyone who doesn't like the way her writing and her series has gone downhill is a prude and can't take her juicy sex scenes. Like Richard being stuck in his worldview so firmly that he couldn't even entertain the idea that Anita's point of view might be valid, LKH seemed incapable of realizing that most of her readers are NOT prudes, they just like a smidgeon of plot sprinkled in between the sex scenes. Richard's willful blindness to different points of view put Anita's and Jean Claude's life at risk. LKH's blindness to different points of view put the series at risk. As Anita mourned Richard, so have many readers mourned LKH. As Anita reluctantly dropped Richard, realizing there was no possible way to get along with someone so wedded to dogma, so have many readers dropped LKH, realizing well written, solid plot was a thing of the past.

Interesting how art mirrors life, but I'm positive this particular parallel is not one LKH intended. Somehow I doubt LKH is capable of the turnaround she engendered in Richard. Oh well.

LKH had to go get hugs once she had written Haven's death scene because it affected her so deeply. Anita had to go get hugs, too. LKH seems to think that Mary Sue-ing and overidentifying with a character a writer has created is a virtue that other writers should emulate if they want to be as good at writing as she. Her blog states in no uncertain terms that there are writers out there who are "faking" their characters and that it makes them far poorer writers than she. There is a difference that LKH doesn't seem to have grasped between writing believable, engaging, realistic characters and writing a Mary Sue. Unfortunately for her, her readers have grasped that difference quite clearly.

We all know that vampires are hotties - from Anne Rice to Buffy to Twilight, that's been crammed down our throats (and I mean that in a wholly non sexual way) ad infinitum ad nauseum. But the height of the hotness in Anita's harem has approached and then bypassed the ridiculous. And not only are they gorgeous, they're totally girlie. They all sit around and talk - for page after page after page - about their feelings. One of LKH's consistent themes is that Anita is "not like other girls", because she's tough and she's badass and she can take on anyone with both arms broken and still open a can of whup ass the likes of which no one has ever seen on them. Sorry, but it doesn't matter how many extra clips you carry for your Browning hi power, cupcake, when you drone on about your feelings for umpteen pages, and you catalog every stitch of clothing everyone in the room is wearing, you're a GIRL in the truest sense of the word.


For those of you waiting for a return to solving paranormal mysteries with the police, don't hold your breath. When the marshals call her in this book, Anita manages to wade out of assorted bodily fluids to literally phone it in this time.

For those of you who have stopped reading this series, I say it still is good enough to get from the library, although I'm not spending my hard earned cash on it - as long as you're more interested in seeing LKH than Anita Blake. It's a little like being a voyeur, although you have to put up with being smacked by 2 by 4s and the soapbox shrillness. Then again, maybe that's all part of seeing LKH.

There is definitely a thesis in here for some grad student in this series.