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When Will It Happen For Me?
- GenresNonfiction
256 pages, Paperback
Published June 19, 2025
About the author
Phoebe Rogers
1 book3 followersPhoebe Rogers is a Clinical Psychologist and Couples Counsellor specialising in dating and relationships, and is the Founder of The Relationship Space. She has helped thousands through her private practice, courses, and writing to transform the way they can romantically reset and find a loving relationship. Phoebe is sought out for her compassionate, direct, and integrative approach, using Schema Therapy, coaching, couples therapy, and good old-fashioned pragmatic advice. She also runs an online group for women who want healthy relationships.
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Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews
June 20, 2025
’It is vulnerable to be the person that people go to for relationship advice; and behind the professional mask your life is falling apart.’
When Will It Happen For Me? by Phoebe Rogers is part memoir, part therapy session, and part pep talk from the wiser, slightly sarcastic big sister you wish you had. If you’ve ever stared into the void (or at your phone waiting for a text back) and whispered, “Why not me?”, this book grabs your chin gently and goes: “Let’s unpack that, babe.”
Phoebe, a clinical psychologist who was quite literally counselling couples while quietly untangling her own romantic mess, delivers something rare: relationship advice that isn’t smug, preachy, or dipped in toxic positivity. She’s real, funny, heartbreakingly honest and yes, incredibly qualified to walk you through the messy stuff, because she’s been there. Wedding called off? Check. Roster of emotionally unavailable men? Check. Deep reflection followed by growth and boundaries? Double check.
Each chapter feels like a healing hangout, there’s laughter, vulnerability, a touch of heartbreak, and some truly brilliant therapeutic exercises that make you pause and go: “Damn, I needed this.”
This isn’t about manifesting Mr. Right with rose quartz and moon water (though no shade if that’s your thing). It’s about doing the work, learning your patterns, and actually liking the person you’re bringing to the table. It’s funny, grounding, and somehow hugely comforting.
Read this if you’re tired of dating books that sound like they were ghost-written by a dating app algorithm. Phoebe brings heart, humour, healing and reminds you: it will happen for you. Just not on society’s schedule. (and thank goodness for that!)
My Highest Recommendation.
Available Now!
When Will It Happen For Me? by Phoebe Rogers is part memoir, part therapy session, and part pep talk from the wiser, slightly sarcastic big sister you wish you had. If you’ve ever stared into the void (or at your phone waiting for a text back) and whispered, “Why not me?”, this book grabs your chin gently and goes: “Let’s unpack that, babe.”
Phoebe, a clinical psychologist who was quite literally counselling couples while quietly untangling her own romantic mess, delivers something rare: relationship advice that isn’t smug, preachy, or dipped in toxic positivity. She’s real, funny, heartbreakingly honest and yes, incredibly qualified to walk you through the messy stuff, because she’s been there. Wedding called off? Check. Roster of emotionally unavailable men? Check. Deep reflection followed by growth and boundaries? Double check.
Each chapter feels like a healing hangout, there’s laughter, vulnerability, a touch of heartbreak, and some truly brilliant therapeutic exercises that make you pause and go: “Damn, I needed this.”
This isn’t about manifesting Mr. Right with rose quartz and moon water (though no shade if that’s your thing). It’s about doing the work, learning your patterns, and actually liking the person you’re bringing to the table. It’s funny, grounding, and somehow hugely comforting.
Read this if you’re tired of dating books that sound like they were ghost-written by a dating app algorithm. Phoebe brings heart, humour, healing and reminds you: it will happen for you. Just not on society’s schedule. (and thank goodness for that!)
My Highest Recommendation.
Available Now!
June 30, 2025
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
💫💫💫💫💫
I think Phoebe Rogers has found a perfect niche for her empathetic and caring way. She has this magical set of experience in her field, tapping into an area which is so needed, but one which I never thought could become something so vibrant and needed. I had the ‘I wish this was in my hands 30 plus years ago’ moment. We weren’t this lucky then.
Using a mix of deeply honest and open personal experience with her breadth of knowledge as a clinician, this is not only for those seeking love and being affirmed while doing so, it is for those in a relationship and who want to deepen what is happening now.
Phoebe was successfully helping others (you will see exactly how this was done, using clear examples and scenarios) in her couples counselling practice, but was not in a healthy relationship herself. This is a memoir of the fascinating ability to see what was not working while in the quagmire of her own personal emotional turmoil, to taking the painful steps to better her life.
This wasn’t luck or timing, it was seriously applying her learned skills of Schema Therapy, combined with attachment theory and a polished psychology experience to push through the shame of a failed relationship and learning to sooth and love herself before anyone else. The trauma of the past needs to be respected by the inner child, and we see how this can be achieved.
I met Phoebe at a launch and talked about the founders of attachment theory and ‘the strange situation’. I love this topic and loved that Phoebe got me and my interests. This is a book for women at many stages in life. I learned so much - all presented in well written plain language, this is a lesson in love and so much more. I highly recommend, and thank you Phoebe 💕💕
💫💫💫💫💫
I think Phoebe Rogers has found a perfect niche for her empathetic and caring way. She has this magical set of experience in her field, tapping into an area which is so needed, but one which I never thought could become something so vibrant and needed. I had the ‘I wish this was in my hands 30 plus years ago’ moment. We weren’t this lucky then.
Using a mix of deeply honest and open personal experience with her breadth of knowledge as a clinician, this is not only for those seeking love and being affirmed while doing so, it is for those in a relationship and who want to deepen what is happening now.
Phoebe was successfully helping others (you will see exactly how this was done, using clear examples and scenarios) in her couples counselling practice, but was not in a healthy relationship herself. This is a memoir of the fascinating ability to see what was not working while in the quagmire of her own personal emotional turmoil, to taking the painful steps to better her life.
This wasn’t luck or timing, it was seriously applying her learned skills of Schema Therapy, combined with attachment theory and a polished psychology experience to push through the shame of a failed relationship and learning to sooth and love herself before anyone else. The trauma of the past needs to be respected by the inner child, and we see how this can be achieved.
I met Phoebe at a launch and talked about the founders of attachment theory and ‘the strange situation’. I love this topic and loved that Phoebe got me and my interests. This is a book for women at many stages in life. I learned so much - all presented in well written plain language, this is a lesson in love and so much more. I highly recommend, and thank you Phoebe 💕💕
May 21, 2025
This book is a warm cup of tea for anyone who has ever wanted love, known love or been burnt in love. Phoebe Rogers seamlessly blends vulnerability with the deepest self-reflection and clinical expertise in this heart-on-sleeve guide to finding love.
Phoebe’s unique position of being a clinical psychologist and couples counsellor, as well as an unlucky-in-love woman in her mid-thirties, makes for an engaging read. For those of us with only a surface level understanding of psychology, the discussions of Schema Theory and Attachment Theory are delivered in a way that is interesting and accessible. Wise and wonderful, Phoebe’s honesty and pin sharp observations has something to teach us all.
Thank you Phoebe for sharing an advance reader copy.
Phoebe’s unique position of being a clinical psychologist and couples counsellor, as well as an unlucky-in-love woman in her mid-thirties, makes for an engaging read. For those of us with only a surface level understanding of psychology, the discussions of Schema Theory and Attachment Theory are delivered in a way that is interesting and accessible. Wise and wonderful, Phoebe’s honesty and pin sharp observations has something to teach us all.
Thank you Phoebe for sharing an advance reader copy.
May 24, 2025
Wow—this is the first relationship book that truly got me. Phoebe captures the emotional rollercoaster of dating and unmet expectations in such an honest, compassionate way. Every chapter felt like she was speaking directly to my experiences. The insights? Spot on. It’s not sugar-coated advice or vague affirmations—it’s grounded, real, and incredibly validating.
What I loved most: the chapters are short, to the point, and so easy to digest. You can read one before bed, on a lunch break, or during a quiet moment with a coffee. And at the end of each chapter, there’s a gentle activity or journaling prompt that helps you process what you’ve read and reflect on your own journey.
This isn’t just a book—it’s a safe space to feel seen and understood. If you’ve ever asked yourself why past relationships haven’t worked or wondered when your time will come, this book is for you. Highly recommend it to anyone navigating dating or healing from love that didn’t go as planned. It gave me clarity, comfort, and most of all—hope.
What I loved most: the chapters are short, to the point, and so easy to digest. You can read one before bed, on a lunch break, or during a quiet moment with a coffee. And at the end of each chapter, there’s a gentle activity or journaling prompt that helps you process what you’ve read and reflect on your own journey.
This isn’t just a book—it’s a safe space to feel seen and understood. If you’ve ever asked yourself why past relationships haven’t worked or wondered when your time will come, this book is for you. Highly recommend it to anyone navigating dating or healing from love that didn’t go as planned. It gave me clarity, comfort, and most of all—hope.
October 19, 2025
What a wonderful, thought provoking no BS approach to modern dating. No shame, no blame just practical tips encompassed by personal experience. A delight to read
October 27, 2025
Reviewed by Ian Banks for Bluewolf Reviews and Pheobe Rogers -
Finding love, the right partner, the lifelong friend is one of the most challenging things to achieve in the world of today, where the fast pace of life limits opportunity to meet and mingle with a diverse range of people.
But what happens when you keep crashing your relationships, thinking or overthinking every nuance and blaming yourself every time the relationship ends.
Pheobe Rogers a Clinical Psychologist specialising in Couples Therapy found herself in such a dilemma about failed relationships, she realised that perhaps she also needed therapy and began to research the most effective way to hopefully push her reset button.
Discovering the self-love therapy Schema Therapy, which addresses deep emotional issues and teaches how to begin to unpack deeply held beliefs and emotional ‘roadblocks, she realised that by helping herself she was also helping her clients to form better, more enjoyable and successful relationships.
In When Will It Happen For Me she shares her journey towards forming a happy and enjoyable relationship, looks at the many triggers that were holding her back and reaches out with understanding and compassion to anyone in need of a little help in discovering a fresh way forward.
As she says, ‘Love is out there waiting for you’ and with the help, support and the commonsense to be found in When Will It Happen For Me it could be the helping hand you need to begn your journey towards finding the right person for you.
Finding love, the right partner, the lifelong friend is one of the most challenging things to achieve in the world of today, where the fast pace of life limits opportunity to meet and mingle with a diverse range of people.
But what happens when you keep crashing your relationships, thinking or overthinking every nuance and blaming yourself every time the relationship ends.
Pheobe Rogers a Clinical Psychologist specialising in Couples Therapy found herself in such a dilemma about failed relationships, she realised that perhaps she also needed therapy and began to research the most effective way to hopefully push her reset button.
Discovering the self-love therapy Schema Therapy, which addresses deep emotional issues and teaches how to begin to unpack deeply held beliefs and emotional ‘roadblocks, she realised that by helping herself she was also helping her clients to form better, more enjoyable and successful relationships.
In When Will It Happen For Me she shares her journey towards forming a happy and enjoyable relationship, looks at the many triggers that were holding her back and reaches out with understanding and compassion to anyone in need of a little help in discovering a fresh way forward.
As she says, ‘Love is out there waiting for you’ and with the help, support and the commonsense to be found in When Will It Happen For Me it could be the helping hand you need to begn your journey towards finding the right person for you.
August 6, 2026
I really hope her partner that she describes at the end of the book is an accurate reflection of him now, the person he was when he met her didn’t seem like he was able to meet her important needs. I didn’t like the part where he blamed her for being upset that he curtly said goodbye at the end of their trip. Perfectly valid to be upset over that. Other than that, I found the exercises in this book to be really helpful and I love how it empowers the individual to put themselves back at the centre of their relationship path.
August 31, 2025
Phoebe provides so much insight in such a relatable way. Her knowledge and experience shine through every page. This book is a must-read.
June 24, 2026
Insightful and well written I wish I’d had this back in my dating days and it’s on my shelf for future use if I ever need it. The combo of personal experience has a manor feel while case studies and exercises make it immersive. A must have not only for those in the dating world but also for those who want to work on themselves.
July 28, 2025
Phoebe Rogers has pulled off something remarkable with When Will It Happen For Me?—a dating memoir that’s smart, funny, emotionally honest, and genuinely helpful without ever slipping into clichés or self-help fluff. Drawing from her work as a clinical psychologist, she weaves together personal experience, therapeutic insight, and sharp humour to create something far richer than your standard relationship book.
What makes this stand out is how grounded it is. Rogers doesn’t offer quick fixes or magical thinking. Instead, she unpacks things like attachment styles and Schema Therapy in a way that’s super accessible, all while reflecting on her own romantic trials with refreshing honesty.
Each chapter is like sitting down with someone who’s been through the emotional trenches and come out wiser. There are brilliant journaling prompts and exercises too. But more than that, there’s a steady message of hope. Insightful, comforting, and far more grounded than most books in this space. A total standout.
What makes this stand out is how grounded it is. Rogers doesn’t offer quick fixes or magical thinking. Instead, she unpacks things like attachment styles and Schema Therapy in a way that’s super accessible, all while reflecting on her own romantic trials with refreshing honesty.
Each chapter is like sitting down with someone who’s been through the emotional trenches and come out wiser. There are brilliant journaling prompts and exercises too. But more than that, there’s a steady message of hope. Insightful, comforting, and far more grounded than most books in this space. A total standout.
June 29, 2025
i found this book so easy to read and relate to
It has helped me find my self love and ways i never knew existed and the schemas which i could relate to
and helped me work out which ones relate to me
this book is a must read!!
It has helped me find my self love and ways i never knew existed and the schemas which i could relate to
and helped me work out which ones relate to me
this book is a must read!!
October 9, 2025
Pheobe's book is written so well and I learnt so much from it as a single woman and as a psychologist myself! She beautifully shares her story and I thoroughly enjoyed reading every page - couldn't recommend this more.
January 22, 2026
Beautiful writing! Loved the book and reading about Phoebe’s story which is relatable. I would recommend this book for women who are single, dating or currently in relationships. I wish I had this information earlier in my life. I will be revisiting this book in the future.
Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews