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I Take This Man
Here comes the bride . . . there goes the groom. Penny Bracket waited two years to marry dream man Bram Shiraz. Then on the morning of the Big Day, while she's trying on her veil, Penny receives the worst two-line letter of her life: " Penny, I can't go through with it. Sorry, Bram. " Penny's hurt and upset. But Esther, Penny's divorced mom, wants Bram's head on a platter. So Mom ambushes the cold-footed coward before he hot-foots it out of town, bonks him on the head with a champagne bottle, and spirits him away to a hidden room in her gargantuan mansion in Short Hares, New Jersey. Esther doesn't want much. All Bram has to do is write personal, heartfelt apologies to each of the two hundred disappointed wedding guests . . . and eat every mouthful of the very expensive gourmet wedding feast that has gone to waste. Then he'll be free to leave. Penny doesn't want Bram tortured. She just wants answers to "why" . . . and maybe a little revenge. Will she discover her runaway groom is locked away in the attic? Will Bram's widowed father—handsome tough-guy Keith Shiraz—be able to locate his missing son . . . and maybe seduce Esther Bracket in the bargain? Will Bram be able to maintain his athletic figure after consuming two hundred entrées and thousands of baby quiches? Read on!
296 pages, Paperback
First published March 27, 2007
20 people are currently reading
398 people want to read
About the author
Valerie Frankel
52 books115 followersShe's written twenty books (e.g., The Accidental Virgin and The Girlfriend Curse), and contributed to dozens of publications including the New York Times, Self, Allure, Glamour, Parenting and Good Housekeeping. Her memoir, Thin Is the New Happy, about overcoming bad body image after 30 years of dieting and self-loathing, was recently described as "Rueful, zestful and surprisingly funny," by the New York Times.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 38 reviews
March 9, 2020
A short but fun read
September 2, 2023
Este livro lançado em 2008, foi uma daquelas surpresas para lá de agradáveis, num selo recém criado pela Editora Planeta, focado num público feminino que curtia histórias românticas, divertidas e inteligentes.
Tudo começa quando Btam, o noivo, decide um pouco antes da cerimônia de casamento que ele não poderia levar aquilo adiante.
Bom, a noiva, Penny, foi pega totalmente de surpresa e teve de lidar com os convidados sozinha. Mas a grande estrela do enredo é a mãe dela, Esther Bracket.
Ela decide ir à caça de seu ex-futuro genro e não só fazê-lo pagar por fazer sua filha sofrer, mas ele teria de comer TODA A COMIDA DA RECEPÇÃO.
Nesse ínterim, o pai de Bram percebendo que seu filho havia desaparecido, decide tentar encontrá-lo.
Numa verdadeira comédia de erros, e encontros inusitados, esta comédia com final maravilhoso diverte de forma deliciosa.
Uma pena que esse selo parou de trazer grandes títulos assim.
5 estrelas
Tudo começa quando Btam, o noivo, decide um pouco antes da cerimônia de casamento que ele não poderia levar aquilo adiante.
Bom, a noiva, Penny, foi pega totalmente de surpresa e teve de lidar com os convidados sozinha. Mas a grande estrela do enredo é a mãe dela, Esther Bracket.
Ela decide ir à caça de seu ex-futuro genro e não só fazê-lo pagar por fazer sua filha sofrer, mas ele teria de comer TODA A COMIDA DA RECEPÇÃO.
Nesse ínterim, o pai de Bram percebendo que seu filho havia desaparecido, decide tentar encontrá-lo.
Numa verdadeira comédia de erros, e encontros inusitados, esta comédia com final maravilhoso diverte de forma deliciosa.
Uma pena que esse selo parou de trazer grandes títulos assim.
5 estrelas
February 24, 2012
I love this book, read it in a couple of days while doing lots of traveling. There were a lot of twists and turns in the plot which kept it interesting but it was still a nice easy-read. Some sex scenes in it so if your're not in to that sort of reading it won't be for you. I found the book very funny and it managed to make me laugh out loud at some points.
I really enjoyed the storyline as it's based on a mother and daughter relationship and as I have a really strong with my own mother I could relate to it.
I really enjoyed the storyline as it's based on a mother and daughter relationship and as I have a really strong with my own mother I could relate to it.
September 5, 2011
I've read and enjoyed Valerie Frankel's books in the past, but was disappointed with this one. Very contrived and over the top. Almost like the author was trying TOO hard to be funny. I kept reading thinking it would get better, but it didn't. If you like your books realistic, this is not the book for you. But if you like your chick lit fluffy, give it a whirl.[return[returnAnd the numerous typos were very distracting - didn't anyone proofread this book after it was sent through spell-check?
January 17, 2009
Pretty awful
February 4, 2011
This book was a little too dirty for me. While I liked the concept and the idea of the story, the execution was a little disappointing.
August 22, 2021
'I Take this Man' is a romance novel written by Valerie Frankel about a young woman, Penny, who is left standing at the altar by her fiance, Bram. Penny's mother, Esther, is furious about Bram flaking out of the wedding. In her rage, Esther goes to Bram's hotel room to confront him, and without thinking, knocks him unconscious with a champagne bottle. Before Esther knows it, she has taken Bram and has him kidnapped in her house, using her Russian housekeeper, Natalie, as an accomplice. Can Esther keep Penny from finding out what she has done to Bram? And can she keep Bram's father distracted from looking for his son, whilst maybe finding romance with him too?
I had heard great things about this book, and went into it with high expectations. However, I just didn't find myself enjoying it at all. Whilst I did enjoy the very beginning of the book and where it all started out, I felt as though the book began to go downhill after the first couple of chapters for a number of reasons.
I found that there were parts towards the beginning of the book with a lot of spelling and grammar mistakes. Whilst this didn't continue throughout the entirety of the book and did start to improve as the book went on, I found that this had already put off me slightly.
The characters of the book were also what put me off in I Take this Man. I found that the characters were all very unlikeable and odd, especially Esther and Penny. Esther was very off-putting throughout the entirety of the book and overall was just a strange woman. Penny was also quite an odd character; her and Esther definitely made for strange protagonists. I found myself rooting more for Bram despite this book being centred more around the two women. I felt more sympathy for Bram than I did for Penny as the book went on, and even though Bram wasn't the most perfect character in the book either, he was the most likeable in my opinion.
The storyline was also a little strange, too. I understand the concept of the book that Valerie Frankel intended, but I feel like it could maybe have been written better. There were parts added to the book, especially towards the final few chapters and the end of the book in particular, that seemed strange to suddenly be happening in the plot. There were several parts in the book where the characters would do particular things that would confuse me and make me question them. I think that most of this could have been written differently to seem more natural.
I think that overall, this book is definitely not your average romance novel, and probably merges into more of a drama book. Whilst I admire the unique concept of this book and the direction that Valerie Frankel was willing to take with this, I think that in the end, this book just wasn't particularly for me.
I had heard great things about this book, and went into it with high expectations. However, I just didn't find myself enjoying it at all. Whilst I did enjoy the very beginning of the book and where it all started out, I felt as though the book began to go downhill after the first couple of chapters for a number of reasons.
I found that there were parts towards the beginning of the book with a lot of spelling and grammar mistakes. Whilst this didn't continue throughout the entirety of the book and did start to improve as the book went on, I found that this had already put off me slightly.
The characters of the book were also what put me off in I Take this Man. I found that the characters were all very unlikeable and odd, especially Esther and Penny. Esther was very off-putting throughout the entirety of the book and overall was just a strange woman. Penny was also quite an odd character; her and Esther definitely made for strange protagonists. I found myself rooting more for Bram despite this book being centred more around the two women. I felt more sympathy for Bram than I did for Penny as the book went on, and even though Bram wasn't the most perfect character in the book either, he was the most likeable in my opinion.
The storyline was also a little strange, too. I understand the concept of the book that Valerie Frankel intended, but I feel like it could maybe have been written better. There were parts added to the book, especially towards the final few chapters and the end of the book in particular, that seemed strange to suddenly be happening in the plot. There were several parts in the book where the characters would do particular things that would confuse me and make me question them. I think that most of this could have been written differently to seem more natural.
I think that overall, this book is definitely not your average romance novel, and probably merges into more of a drama book. Whilst I admire the unique concept of this book and the direction that Valerie Frankel was willing to take with this, I think that in the end, this book just wasn't particularly for me.
February 17, 2021
So finally, we have a break through.
Out of all the little black dress books I have been bingeing for the start of the reading year, this one was by far the best.
The narrative is hilarious (crazy mother of the bride whacking the groom over the head with a bottle of champagne for fucking with her daughter, hell yes mumma!) and the book is probably one of the first that deals with an older couple and sexual attraction between them. Writers (and us readers too) often forget that hey, the older generation read and yes, they have sex too, so reading about older characters, widowed and seperated and with grown up children having sex and starting new relationships, it was refreshing to read!
The book also handles very real topics of sex between the MC and her love interest and spoke very openly about issues of fake orgasms which again, is a very big topic to talk about openly in a novel.
However- and we knew this was coming...no pun intended. Of course there was an aspect of lack of communication and unrealistic expectations, because of course there was. Instead of the bride and groom being honest about their sex lives they decided to lie to each other about it, even up to their wedding day. And then after they make up, she just so happens to have her first orgasm not once, but twice! Shocker...and unrealistic. Can I say I was surprised by this magical and sudden plot point...Nah, not really. Because communication can suddenly flick on a switch and make you orgasm multiple times...eye roll.
I liked the book, best by far out of the books I have read this year.
Onto the next!
Out of all the little black dress books I have been bingeing for the start of the reading year, this one was by far the best.
The narrative is hilarious (crazy mother of the bride whacking the groom over the head with a bottle of champagne for fucking with her daughter, hell yes mumma!) and the book is probably one of the first that deals with an older couple and sexual attraction between them. Writers (and us readers too) often forget that hey, the older generation read and yes, they have sex too, so reading about older characters, widowed and seperated and with grown up children having sex and starting new relationships, it was refreshing to read!
The book also handles very real topics of sex between the MC and her love interest and spoke very openly about issues of fake orgasms which again, is a very big topic to talk about openly in a novel.
However- and we knew this was coming...no pun intended. Of course there was an aspect of lack of communication and unrealistic expectations, because of course there was. Instead of the bride and groom being honest about their sex lives they decided to lie to each other about it, even up to their wedding day. And then after they make up, she just so happens to have her first orgasm not once, but twice! Shocker...and unrealistic. Can I say I was surprised by this magical and sudden plot point...Nah, not really. Because communication can suddenly flick on a switch and make you orgasm multiple times...eye roll.
I liked the book, best by far out of the books I have read this year.
Onto the next!
November 19, 2018
This book is really boring, I was expecting lot more from the title of the book. It seemed very interesting in the starting and then it turned out to be disaster. it was too dirty, felt like to leave in half way but the i wont like it either so continued and finished in few days.The plot was interesting but the story took very unwanted turn and it was in bearable to read it with such a turn in story. Not recommend.
February 29, 2020
Ehh, I don't want to be overly critical but this wasn't a super great read. I'm giving it two stars because around the back half of the book, mostly with Esther's story arc though, I found myself enjoying what I was reading. Unfortunately, as a whole, this book was dreadfully boring. I won't spoil anything but I just didn't get any excitement from the Penny and Bram storyline. It was rather boring, to be honest. Would not recommend.
July 19, 2020
I really loved this book. It is a light breezy read and just what I needed to fight my reader's block. This is my first book of the author and now I would definitely pick her other titles.
Even though the story may have been a tad dramatic, but it had humour and twists which kept me hooked to the book. Absolutely loved it!
Even though the story may have been a tad dramatic, but it had humour and twists which kept me hooked to the book. Absolutely loved it!
January 12, 2018
The story line wasn't a bit believable, but I liked the characters, i enjoyed the story, I laughed out loud several times and most importantly I loved the end!
November 5, 2018
It was a fun, far-fetched read. Stuff and nonsense with some rather raunchy stuff that I was not expecting or tbh needing to read.
January 6, 2020
This is a nice book with really hellacious parts and so much drama , one can make a really amazing romcom out of it
April 20, 2020
It was a short fun read
November 2, 2022
Bought this long ago for a discount at Barnes and Noble. It is a very enjoyable book. A very light read and funny. Highly recommend! Actually just read it for a second time recently.
March 27, 2023
Fun read. Easy read. Be aware of some cringe. Overal I had fun and might look up more from this writer.
September 8, 2025
Hilarious
September 3, 2015
This story opens on the wedding day of Jersey girl Penny, 23. Moments before she's supposed to take her first steps toward the altar, one of her fiancee's groomsmen comes in with a note from Bram, the groom, that basically just says "Can't do it, sorry." Penny goes into such a state of shock that all she can do is comment on the quality of the stationery. Mother of the bride doesn't take the news so lightly. She thinks of the two years her daughter has spent with this man, the $75,000 tab wracked up to pull off this dream day and answers with a momma bear awww helll nah! Penny's mother kidnaps Bram before he's able to leave town, locks him up in the former nursery room of her mansion, and explains to him that since she now has to eat the cost of the wedding, he has to eat all 200 servings of the catered food as well as write out apology / thank you for your gift cards. She also wants answers for his actions. Penny's mom, through a number of comedic twists, is able to keep Bram's whereabouts secret from Penny, who comes to stay at her mom's mansion for a time to lick her emotional wounds.
The story had a cute, humorous concept and it started out well, but I think after awhile the humor got a little stale for me. While there were scenes that did have me quietly chuckling (and I appreciate the Spinal Tap reference in Chapter 3), I felt some of the jokes ran a little long, were hammered a little too heavily, and some of the puns had me cringing.
Then there was Bram. I had mixed feelings about him. At first I was disturbed at his sexualization of Disney's Cinderella, leaving part of me to scream what a creeper! But then later he makes himself seem like a decent guy and when he explains why he did what he did, I was thinking "that kinda makes sense." Not saying the behavior itself wasn't a jerk maneuver, but I could see his logic and felt like given his explanation, deserved a little more slack than he got. Also -- to me anyway -- it seemed like not all that much of the story was spent on Bram in his hostage situation. It felt more like the reader just gets to pop in on him from time to time. Maybe that was just to drag out the story length, but to me it felt odd.
This story is heavily laced with profanity and there are quite a few sexual descriptions / conversations among the main characters. Sex and profanity don't typically bother me unless it's the type that offers nothing to the story and only seems to be there for edge / shock factor. My issue with this story is some of the descriptions were not so much sexy but just bordered on ick. I did have a laugh at the girl getting all excited about throwing down in the back of a town car. If a town car is the height of your fantasies... you might want to check your pulse lol.
I was kinda liking the conversation Bram & Penny get to have near the end but dang, that ending. WEEAAAKK. Just silly.
The story had a cute, humorous concept and it started out well, but I think after awhile the humor got a little stale for me. While there were scenes that did have me quietly chuckling (and I appreciate the Spinal Tap reference in Chapter 3), I felt some of the jokes ran a little long, were hammered a little too heavily, and some of the puns had me cringing.
Then there was Bram. I had mixed feelings about him. At first I was disturbed at his sexualization of Disney's Cinderella, leaving part of me to scream what a creeper! But then later he makes himself seem like a decent guy and when he explains why he did what he did, I was thinking "that kinda makes sense." Not saying the behavior itself wasn't a jerk maneuver, but I could see his logic and felt like given his explanation, deserved a little more slack than he got. Also -- to me anyway -- it seemed like not all that much of the story was spent on Bram in his hostage situation. It felt more like the reader just gets to pop in on him from time to time. Maybe that was just to drag out the story length, but to me it felt odd.
This story is heavily laced with profanity and there are quite a few sexual descriptions / conversations among the main characters. Sex and profanity don't typically bother me unless it's the type that offers nothing to the story and only seems to be there for edge / shock factor. My issue with this story is some of the descriptions were not so much sexy but just bordered on ick. I did have a laugh at the girl getting all excited about throwing down in the back of a town car. If a town car is the height of your fantasies... you might want to check your pulse lol.
I was kinda liking the conversation Bram & Penny get to have near the end but dang, that ending. WEEAAAKK. Just silly.
June 2, 2007
This book I thought was an original idea...its what every woman would want her mother to do, if she herself couldn't. Kidnap the run-away groom and force feed him the wedding dinner and cake....all in the quest to find out why?
June 9, 2008
I just didn't get this book. Way too far fetched for my liking.
July 25, 2008
Love this book! Lots of twists and turns. The mom acts exactly how most of us would if our daughters were left at the altar! Quick read.
January 28, 2010
Valerie Frankel books are usually funny with a little bit pf raunchiness.
If you are into short chicklits, you should read her books.
If you are into short chicklits, you should read her books.
October 3, 2014
Funny quick read!
December 29, 2011
I really enjoyed the plot twists in this book! But I can't say it is one that I would read it again!
January 17, 2011
It was a pretty funny story with a few great one-liners. I don't know that I'll remember it a few years down the road, but it was fun while it lasted.
February 3, 2011
I feel like If this happened to my daughter I would sooooo be the brides mother!
Read
August 3, 2011my boyfriend actually picked this out for me. It was super cute.
June 19, 2012
This book was hilarious! I wasn't thrilled with the ending, but that's just personal preference. From beginning to end, it was constantly funny and a little weird. Definitely a fun read.
July 15, 2012
It was a laugh out loud, light, fast read. Story line ridiculous, but still entertaining.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 38 reviews