Esther Is Now Following You

by Tanya Sweeney

You're the love of her life. You just don't know it yet...

'I really REALLY felt for Esther. This is such a great book. People will LOVE it!’ Marian Keyes

'I loved this book. A wild ride of a read, funny yet poignant, it is a gripping page turner.' Liz Nugent

'Easily the funniest book I’ve read this year, I adored it.' Andrea Mara

You have one new follower.

Esther first sees Ted walking in a park in London. They lock eyes and for a fraction of a second, she feels something she’s never felt before.

She starts by reading up about his life in Canada and his work as an actor. Then she watches every interview with him online. It isn’t long before she’s joined Ted’s fan site online where her and the ‘Tedettes’ stalk his every move.

When Ted gets a new celebrity girlfriend, Esther decides that things have gone far enough. She leaves her husband, takes all their savings, and buys a one-way ticket to Canada.

After all, Ted might not know it yet, but they are meant to be together – he just needs a little bit of persuading.

Esther is Now Following You is an irresistible debut novel about obsession and celebrity fandom.

***Readers love Esther is Now Following You!***

'I was utterly immersed in this and hope that Sweeney writes more.' FIVE-STAR Review

'It's a must-read and I've never seen anything quite like it before.' FIVE-STAR Review

'I was hooked on Esther's character.' FIVE-STAR Review

Genres: Fiction, Mystery

297 pages, Kindle Edition

Expected publication January 29, 2026

Reviews

[Ceecee · Rating 4 out of 5]

Esther is now following you …Ted Levy

If Esther appears on Mastermind her specialist subjects would be:-
1. Ted Levy, a Canadian actor
2. The following of Ted Levy on social media, obsessively ensuring she has seen every post, interview etc
3. Fantasising and fandom of Ted Levy ~ The Teddettes
4. How to do away with the competition so they can be together
5. Ted Levy, a Canadian actor

Well, that was different. I can’t say that I find the novel funny but I’m not even sure it’s actually meant to be. However, I do find the writing to be witty at times and the characterisation is excellent. I alternate between utterly despairing over Esther‘s actions as she implodes her nice life, exasperation (or admiration??) with some of her bolder actions which beggars belief, to wanting to hug her/shake her/boot her up the backside and everything in between. Her obsession with Ted seems inexplicable and her actions desperate and I don’t know what to make of it all. Then everything makes so much sense as the ending is reached and Esther is redeemed. It is deeply moving, very poignant and it all slots beautifully into place.

If you fancy reading something that doesn’t quite fit into any category, that’s a bit left field with a character that will baffle, irritate, annoy but also amuse and then make you shed a tear, then this is for you.

Great cover art too.

With thanks to NetGalley and especially to Random House UK/Transworld for the much appreciated early copy in return for an honest review.

[Sarah Goodwin · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ho-ly Shit.

I think this is going to be a polarizing one and my one issue with it is that the cover holds not a single hint of the deep, dark journey you're about to go on.

But sometimes that can be a good thing.

Esther is a 'crazed fan' using fandom - as many do - to get through a dark time in her life. The girls that get it, get it. Both times I've found myself deep into fandom I've been going through something that I needed an escape from. And obsession can be a break from introspection and dwelling. It can give you a community with other fans.

It can drive you completely insane.

I can't speak to how this book handles the subject of pregnancy loss except to say I was deeply moved by it and empathised a lot with Esther, even when she was at her very worst. Which is a lot to ask of a child-free lesbian.

It's a must-read and I've never seen anything quite like it before.

[Mandy White (mandylovestoread) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Do not be fooled by the comic vibe of the cover, this is one dark and disturbing read.

This book was not what I was expecting at all. I thought it would a light, funny read about a celebrity obsession taken too far. It is that but without the light an funny. It is dark, it is sad and it is unsettling. I wasn’t too sure about it when I started but I continued after reading some reviews from trusted sources. I am glad that I stuck with it, to see what pushed Esther to go the extremes that she did, but she didn’t grow on me at all. She was frustrating and made some very very bad decisions for a 36 year old woman

The subject of online trolls and obsessive fans is a big part of this story and it add me really uncomfortable. Seeing the way people can treat other people that they don’t even know is just awful. There will be many triggers in this book for people so be careful before reading.

Thanks to Random House UK, Bantam, Transworld for my copy of this book that will be available January 29th. This will be a book that divides readers.

[Ross · Rating 3 out of 5]

funny, great style of writing but the end left me disappointed. a big build up to ultimately nothing really ?

[Stu Cummins · Rating 5 out of 5]

Funny, unsettling, and emotionally impactful debut that will stay with you!

I’ll start this review by saying that ESTHER IS NOW FOLLOWING YOU is a book that was nothing at all like I thought it would be. Let me clarify: it was a MILLION TIMES MORE than my preconceptions! This is a book that blends genre and gets you thinking in so many ways. It’s simultaneously hilarious and heart-breaking. It’s chilling in many ways and also emotional jenga in others. I went into this book expecting to read about an unhinged, celebrity stalker - and whilst an element of Esther is exactly this! - this book isn’t a fast-paced crime thriller, it’s a book of huge emotional depth, with incredible characterisation, and the most remarkably human storyline. Sweeney manages to bring together so many elements to create a really intriguing and unique read. In some ways I was reminded of REALLY GOOD, ACTUALLY, but then there’s the added layer of the deception and tension around Esther’s obsession with Ted Levy. I was absolutely glued to Esther’s story, feeling all the suspense around her engineering herself into Ted’s life. I was waiting for the “bunny boiler” moments or for this book to slide into the farcical thriller territory of films like OBSESSED or THE BOY NEXT DOOR, but never did. The tension is definitely there, but this book is a whole lot more than that and for all the right reasons.

I don’t want to give away too much about the plot, because I feel my experience was all the better for having my preconceptions blown to smithereens! However, I want to talk about some of the themes that made this book so brilliant. Sweeney explores things like loss, grief, trauma (both past and present), and misplaced feelings all through the lens of celebrity obsession. The Tedettes Facebook group really highlights the vulnerability and mental fragility that can sit behind fandom. This is explored with humour, but also a genuine empathy. Esther and her fellow Tedette’s are bonded by their unsettling crushes on Ted Levy, but also their respective traumas and the emotional challenges they have all faced. The book explores how trauma can manifest itself into misplaced obsession and in a way, I found myself being emotionally manipulated by this into willing the story to become a romcom. At points I was desperate for Esther’s fantasy about meeting Ted and him falling madly in love with her to come true! This was so thought-provoking and really hammered home the idea that our emotions and perceptions can be so easily manipulated. This book was a fascinating exploration of mental wellbeing in the aftermath of a trauma and how sometimes losing yourself in a fantasy world is exactly what you need to protect yourself.

This is such a complex narrative, but also incredibly witty and easy to read. Sweeney has established an incredible style that I look forward to returning to in her future books. If Esther isn’t on your radar yet, she should be! Get following her at @estherfollowsyou 😉

[Lucy Skeet · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5/5

This was unlike anything I’ve ever read! Deeper than I was expecting, heartbreaking and funny at the same time. I loved it! Review on insta soon, thanks to Bantam for my copy x

[Takealookinsideabook · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow, this book is so addictive and consuming! I have so many feelings about this story!

It really opens your eyes to how people can be online and how addictive it can become.

I think we're all abit guilty of doom scrolling and get sucked into our phones when we should be cleaning or doing those mundane tasks we keep putting off.

Esther basically takes that and mulplies by 1000 and in doing so, provides us with a dark and dangerous story you'll be so consumed you won't want to put it down.

This book is crazy and chaotic but at its heart, its a story about love and loss and it deals with some very difficult themes in a very delicate manner.

I knew as soon as I heard about this book that I would love it and I was definitely not wrong!

If you're a fan of YOU and Baby Reindeer then prepare for this book to be your next obsession 👀

Thank you to the publisher for sending me a proof copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

[Shona · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.75⭐️💫 Esther first sees Ted walking in a park in London. They lock eyes and for a fraction of a second, she feels something she’s never felt before. She starts by reading up about his life in Canada and his work as an actor & then watches every interview with him online. It isn’t long before she’s joined Ted’s fan site online where her and the ‘Tedettes’ stalk his every move. When Ted gets a new celebrity girlfriend, Esther decides that things have gone far enough. She leaves her husband, takes all their savings & buys a one-way ticket to Canada. After all, Ted might not know it yet, but they are meant to be together – he just needs a little bit of persuading.

I was lucky enough to grab a copy of this title at Harrogate earlier in the year, where I also got to listen to the author talk about this unique book.

Firstly I have to admit this wasn’t quite what I was expecting, however not in a bad way as I thoroughly enjoyed the author’s captivating writing style - I truly felt I was living this crazy life with Esther throughout thanks to the descriptive, engaging prose.

What I thought was going to be a comical outlook into the obsession with the celebrity lifestyle, actually turned to be a much darker, in-depth journey covering important issues such as loss, grief and a breakdown due to the inability to deal, please do check relevant triggers for this title as some readers might find certain elements difficult.

Whilst I did enjoy the writing and the title overall, I sometimes struggled to find the balance between the laugh out loud comical moments, Esther’s overall delusion, and the tragic, devastating elements that showed the rawness of characters completely. That said, it is always a nice surprise when a book doesn’t always take the route you thought it would, and the author has done a fantastic job of executing this here. Definitely intrigued as to what comes next from Tanya!

[Books By Your Bedside · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.5 stars

Thanks to Bantam for the advanced copy of this title in return for an honest review. I was lucky enough to receive a proof of this at the Theakston Old Peculiar Crime Festival 2025.

This is a tale of two books. The cover has bright colours, a funny design, and it suggests a funny, quirky, dark humour. But the story itself is less comic thriller and more thriller thriller, it's dark and really quite worrying at times.

My first thought was that Esther was wonderful. She'd been through some tough times and I loved her all the more for that. I feel I shouldn't feel that way given her obsessive nature but I did. I wanted her to have her happily ever after. However, my love for her dwindled and it dwindled quickly. I found myself feeling a bit disgusted and uncomfortable with her. It's obvious what Tanya wanted her to be as a character and she has achieve that creepy, obsessive nature, but I think it was too much too quickly. There was little build-up from uninterested to stalker, and I think it would have been more organic if it had been paced a bit slower.

It was said that it was a funny thriller but I can't say I found it funny in any aspect - I was a bit lost there trying to find the humour.

Whilst I am not a prude in any way, I felt there was too many mentions of sex in this. I have absolutely no issue with there being sex in books, I welcome it in a lot of books, and I do understand she's using it to represent the health of the marriage, but sometimes it felt like she had shoehorned it in because she felt it wouldn't be a grown-up novel if it didn't have it in.

The ending was flat. It got going really quickly and full-on almost instantly, and then there was this huge build-up only for it to end quite disappointingly.

It isn't an overly long book and I am someone who can read a book in a matter of hours, but this took me about 3 or 4 days because I just couldn't stay with it for long periods of times. I admit I did consider DNF-ing several times but I wanted to know what happened in the end, even if I wasn't keen on reading the rest to get there.

I enjoyed parts of it, but I felt very uncomfortable reading it. I'm sure that was probably the aim of it, but it wasn't a pleasant experience. I don't mind feeling uncomfortable about books or characters, but this was too much and it took me out of the story.

I've seen five star reviews and I've seen two star reviews, and even some DNFs. I think it'll definitely be a book to split the readers.

It is an interesting debut and there is promise there. Even though I didn't enjoy it as much as I wanted, and I felt it was flat at times, I do think it's a promising debut and it will be interesting to see what comes next.

[Cynth · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this, I felt for the main character Esther and the writing makes you feel like you are part of the story. The dark humour made this very easy to read despite the difficult topics and themes in this book. Please check your trigger warnings. This touches on child loss and grief. I would recommend this.

[Emma · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was NOT what I expected. I think a lot of what I took from this is the way that Esther dealt with her grief, and that was obsession, which I think is highly relatable. This was such a good read, an took a darker turn than I thought it would!

[Georgina Reads_Eats_Explores · Rating 4 out of 5]

When I first clocked the cover and title of Esther is Now Following You, I thought I was in for something fizzy and satirical about influencer culture. Instead, Tanya Sweeney pulls us into something darker, richer, and far more unsettling — a layered exploration of grief, obsession, and the fragility of a life that suddenly comes undone.

Esther is stuck — in her job, her marriage, her day-to-day existence. But online, in the company of the Tedettes (a fan group for actor Ted Levy), she finds something to keep her upright. Watching Esther dive headfirst into the Tedettes’ world is wild — you’re half-amused, half-horrified, and fully invested in every minor drama she obsesses over. After a heartbreaking miscarriage and the slow unravelling of her reality, that spark grows into a full-blown fixation. With her marriage in tatters, her savings cashed in, and her hope hanging by a thread, Esther heads off to Canada, convinced Ted is her future… even if he doesn’t know it yet.

I was torn the whole way through: one minute wanting to hug Esther for the pain she’s endured, the next wishing she’d give her head a wobble. At times she’s away with the fairies, but you can’t help rooting for her all the same. Her grief, her hope, her utter refusal to see the world as it is… it’s heartbreaking, hilarious, and utterly compelling all at once. Sweeney nails that balance — Esther’s obsession is both terrifying and devastatingly believable.

This isn’t the straight-up thriller the blurb hints at, but something rawer and more human: an exploration of how grief and trauma can warp the world around you. Funny in places, poignant throughout, and always sharp-edged — this is a debut that feels anything but. Sweeney writes with journalistic clarity but a novelist’s heart, and I’ll be first in line for whatever she turns her hand to next.

A wild ride of a read — yes. But also an intimate portrait of loneliness, loss, and the messy, desperate ways we try to cope. Obsession, grief, and questionable life choices — Esther’s got it all.

Thank you to the publisher for the opportunity to read via NetGalley.

[Tracy Fenton · Rating 4 out of 5]

Esther is Now Following You is the debut novel by Tanya Sweeney which is being marketed as perfect for fans for Baby Reindeer and Strange Sally Diamond. I haven’t actually watched Baby Reindeer yet, but adored Strange Sally Diamond, so I was eager to get to know Esther.

If you have read the blurb you (like me) would think this is about a delusional woman who gives up her seemingly perfect life with her husband, flies halfway round the world and starts to stalk a famous actor convinced he is the perfect man for her and the answer to all her problems.

I will admit that I really struggled to understand Esther and felt her behaviour and actions were rather extreme. It was quite obvious that she had some “issues” and perhaps her judgement was slightly askew, but it was only when you start to discover more about Esther and what she was going through that you understand why she did what she did.

There are some light moments of relief, but deep down this is a sad and sorry tale of mental health issues, chronic depression whilst coping with grief and loss.

[Lara A]

I received a copy of this book via Netgalley.

I am DNFing this at 52%, but I need to explain why. This is by no means a bad book. However, I was drawn to this by the cover, thinking it would be an OTT, rather zany read. It is not that at all. At all.

While Esther the main character, is not at all lacking in humour, this is a decidedly bleak read. There are some emotions I really don't like to feel while reading. Disgust is one, wincing for the main character is another. It was physically painful reading this because I would be frowning/wincing/cringing at Esther's choices.

I tried interspersing reading it with other books. I tried only reading one chapter at a time. I couldn't do it. It says a lot about the quality of the writing that Esther feels so vivid and that this feels like more than words on a page, but I just could not persevere any longer. I've unfollowed and unsubscribed.

[Claire · Rating 5 out of 5]

I absolutely loved this debut novel! Tanya Sweeney has written such a clever, powerful, emotional and poignant story that had me hooked from the very first page.

The main character of the book is Esther. Esther is a wonderful character whose evident vulnerabilities are matched by her heart of pure gold. Esther has faced grief and trauma in her past that have profoundly shaped her future and how she copes with life. We all have our own coping mechanisms to help us. I have never met a character as unique and unforgettable as Esther - for many reasons.

We first meet Esther in a London park. And then we meet Ted. Ted is a Canadian actor. From the very first moment Esther lays eyes on Ted, that is it. Esther has fallen deeply, hopelessly and completely for Ted.

What follows is nothing short of stalking. Esther’s days are consumed by Ted; she lives, breathes, and dreams only of Ted. She is obsessed! It starts off with the harmless following of Ted on social media, watching him on TV and becoming a Tedette! But then it goes out of control and well - you will not believe where it goes from here! Esther firmly believes that Ted is her soulmate and that she will do everything and anything to get him!

Unbelievable, insane and uncontrollable, Esther stops at nothing! Oh, my goodness, Esther was simply extraordinary in her endeavours! On one hand you think what is she doing and then on the other hand you are in her world, and you start to get really invested in what she is doing. In the end you will have to decide if you are rooting for her or, or not? I certainly did worry about her. You cannot help but feel for Esther as her vulnerability is laid bare with such honesty. Esther has experienced trauma and loss in the past which has affected her in so many ways and this does understandably impact on the choices and decisions she made. You may or may not agree with them but Esther's story will move you regardless.

A gripping, emotional, and unforgettable read with tough topics dealt with so sensitively. Esther is Now Following You is a 5 star read for me. Tanya Sweeney writes so brilliantly and I cannot wait to read her next book!

Thank you very much to Random House UK, Transworld Publishers, Bantam Books, for my advanced copy. This review is based on a NetGalley ARC provided in exchange for an honest and unbiased opinion.

[KathVBtn · Rating 5 out of 5]

When I saw the cover and title for 'Esther is Now Following You; I thought it was going to be a light-hearted story about influencers and influencer culture, but its actually much deeper and multi-layered with mental health and trauma running throughout.

Esther is stagnating in her life, her marriage, her job, everything. She has been part of an online fan club for actor Ted Levy for some time where the Tedettes swap every minor detail about his life. Esther is convinced that if the two of them were to meet, they would fall in love and Ted would fix all the problems that currently fill her life. When she suffers a tragic miscarriage of their much wanted baby, it tips her over the edge into an extended breakdown and she sets the rest of her world on fire. She cashes in her life savings and takes flight for Canada, where she knows Ted's sister lives. Esther manages to inveigle her way into the sister's home and life.
All she has to do now is sit and wait, surely?

I was hooked on Esther's character, alternating between wanting to cuddle her for all she's been through, shake her for what she's doing now and nag her to think about all she's left behind. Her ongoing obsession with Ted is unlike anything I've ever seen or read about, nothing can get through to her and she remains utterly convinced that Ted is her solution for months and months, lying to everyone about her thoughts and plans.

Its well worth a read and I look forward to seeing what comes next from Tanya Sweeney.

[Kena · Rating 5 out of 5]

Esther is Now Following You is Tanya Sweeney’s debut novel.

It centres on Esther, a thirty something Irish woman, who is going through the motions with her life in London. When we first meet her, she’s married to a lovely man but working in unsatisfactory job in a basement in the City of London. It’s not the life she imagined for herself by any means. Then, tragically, she suffers a miscarriage which puts a strain on her relationship.

Her life and world changes one day when she walks past the international movie star Ted Levy in a London park. She believes that their passing glance was in fact a “connection”. So she then starts to follow his movements on social media because in her mind they are destined to be together. Things very quickly spiral in Esther’s quest to get closer to Ted Levy.

I think this book shows how people respond very differently to grief. I think that Tanya Sweeney handled this very sympathetically. I thought that there were a lot of OMG moments in the book because Esther is so shameless in her pursuit of Ted Levy. Just when you think she can’t possible up the ante any more - she does!

I thought this was a really interesting book and I can’t wait to read what Tanya Sweeney writes next!

Huge thanks to NetGalley and the publishers, Random House UK, Transworld Publishers | Bantam, for making the e-ARC available to me in exchange for a fair and honest review.

[Nick · Rating 5 out of 5]

For months I’ve read the reviews, seen the hype, and followed Esther’s every move… and then one day, she slid into my DMs and asked me to join the Tedettes. Of course I said yes — because let’s face it, Ted Levy is a dream. He’s talented, and he must be protected at all costs from anyone trying to throw him off course. Huge thanks to Esther and the team at Bantam Books/Transworld for recruiting me.

Clearly, I’ve spent far too much time with Esther… What I can say is that I absolutely LOVED this book. Esther Is Now Following You is easily one of my favourites of the year and a stunning debut from Tanya Sweeney. It’s morally grey, and while I had ideas about where I thought it was going, it turned out to be nothing like I expected — and that’s not a bad thing. I often found myself in utter despair at Esther’s actions, desperately wanting to save her from herself; other times, I found her hilarious. But mostly, I wanted to sit her down for a chat and give her a good shake and a hug.

Sweeney beautifully humanises Esther and, although what she’s doing is certainly questionable, what we come to learn about her means you can’t help but root for her.

Esther Is Now Following You is a triumph — a debut that truly packs a punch. If you fancy a read that defies easy categorisation, with complex, hilarious, and multi-layered characters, then this is the one for you. It’s out on 29th January, and I urge you all to pre-order the s**t out of it immediately.

[Fran McBookface · Rating 4 out of 5]

Do you ever start reading a book and think this really wasn't what I was expecting? This can absolutely go either way but with Esther I was very pleasantly surprised.

In the throes of grief and amid the breakdown of her marriageher marrige, Esther ?? becomes obsessed with actor Ted Levy, after spotting him in a park in London. Soon she is stalking him across social media and joining fansites where she and other ‘Tedettes’ compulsively follow his every move.

I will be honest. After the first few pages I wasn’t sure I iked Esther and thought I would have some trouble spending a whole book with her - some of the choices she makes! By the end though, as I learned more about her back story and her motives, I really warmed to Esther and could definitely see myself going out for a drink and a chat with her.

The story is definitely not as light as I expected. I was imagining it would be some sort of fun and fluffy story of stalking and celebrity but while it is witty, even snortingly funny in places, it's also heartbreakingly poignant in others and deals with some very serious issues. Definitely a much more complex and layered story than I expected but really well handled and incredibly readable.

A book that’s hard to put into a genre but one you should definitely put onto your TBR pile

[Charlotte Cutter-Byford · Rating 4 out of 5]

I don’t think I quite realised that this was definitely not a read on the bus book not only because it’s funny and I was giggling to myself like a lunatic but there are definitely moments I would hate for someone to read over my shoulder.

This book follows Esther, married and living in London. Esther catches a glimpse of famous actor Ted in the real world and from that moment it’s game over and she will do anything to be with him.

Firstly Esther is so annoyingly likeable and I want to be her friend despite the very questionable things she does. She makes it so hard to be mad about her actions so I just sat there extremely uncomfortable watching the utter madness unfold.

This book is an excellent read if you’ve ever fallen in love with a celebrity and wandered what trying to get them to fall in love with you would look like. As a clearly less unhinged person it was fun to live vicariously through Esther. That being said this book is all ridiculous antics it also touched upon some really serious and heartbreaking subjects which I feel were dealt with perfectly and didn’t remove you from the overall story.

[Kay Rhys Evans · Rating 4 out of 5]

🩷 Review 🩷 - 3.75 ⭐️

I went in expecting a sharp, funny take on influencer culture, but it’s actually a much darker, sadder story about loneliness, grief and the ways we look for connection when life feels empty.

Esther’s stuck in a job she hates, grieving a miscarriage and feeling invisible in her marriage. Then she spots actor Ted Levy in a London park, joins his fan group, and slowly slips from harmless distraction into obsession. She’s frustrating and unhinged at times, but also painfully believable…I kept switching between wanting to help her and wanting to scream at her.

It’s not as funny as the cover suggests, and the tone wobbles a bit between dark comedy and heartbreak. Some of the fandom moments go too far and the pacing dips, but the writing feels honest and sharp. The author captures that desperate need to belong, to feel seen, and the madness of living too much of your life online.

Not the book I expected, definitely not the thriller I was expecting, but a surprisingly moving debut.


Thank you to NetGalley and @bantambooksuk for the ARC.

[Chelsea Knowles · Rating 5 out of 5]

*Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an advance reader copy of this novel in exchange for an honest review.*

Esther is Now Following You follows Esther as she develops an obsession with an actor, Ted Levy. Something happens in Esther’s life so she goes on a walk and Ted walks past her. She believes they have a connection after they lock eyes. She starts stalking him online by learning about his life and joining a fan page. Ted gets a new girlfriend so Esther decides to go to Canada to try to meet Ted and convince him they should be together.

I really enjoyed this and whilst I don’t tend to enjoy stalking stories I found it easy to connect to Esther because of the event that occurs before the staking. It was easy to understand why Esther latched onto Ted and I think this is a very complex story. The writing was good and I read this book in one sitting. I will be recommending this book as I had a great time reading this. This had some absurd moments but at its core the story has a lot of heart and this is a worthwhile read.

[Bookish Sam · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a ride. I was practically reading it through my fingers. There are a lot of cringe moments that made me feel a little uncomfortable and it was sad to see Esther become more and more unhinged. To be clear though, the cringe is intentional, I am not, for one second, referring to the writing, which is so good. It's well plotted, original and such a good idea for a book.

Esther is not particularly likeable for most of the book, almost an anti-hero but there are darker forces at play that did make me feel sympathetic towards her.

There were plenty of laughs too - the little online fan community she got involved in were well thought out - all equally vile but the content was golden.

All in all a great read - thanks to the publisher for the ARC. Kudos to the marketing team too who have produced a brilliant campaign to promote this and it was the reason I was drawn to the book in the first instance.

[Camilla_Reads · Rating 4 out of 5]

Somehow this book managed to tackle grief, pregnancy loss and the sadness of a relationship meeting its natural end whole simultaneously being the utterly insane story of a celebrity stalker spiralling further and further into her obsession. Did I ever warm to Esther? Not exactly, but I certainly felt incredibly sorry for her the entire book. Grief is a kind of madness. And Esther felt it with every fibre of her being. Actor Ted Levy just happened to be there when she needed something to distract her from that gaping, black hole of loss. I was absolutely hooked, a sick curiosity gluing me to the pages. Read it in one sitting! Recommended if you enjoyed Idol and Strange Sally Diamond.

Thank you Penguin Books for sending me a proof of this book. All thoughts are my own!

[Vanessa Wrafter · Rating 5 out of 5]

really enjoyed this , i received this as a physical arc from penguin publishers , i am extremely greatful for this read , it was amazing from start to finish i absolutely loved this , not my normal read but i think thats why i enjoyed it so much , Esther consumed in her grief, ups her life in london leaving her husband her house and her friends , all to stalk the next biggest star Teddy , spiralling to the ends of the earth she finds herself immersed in a life she lied and manipulated her way into , This for me was a rollercoaster and i felt such empathy for Esther throughout, definitely a book everyone should be pre ordering , out in January 2026 pop it on the tbr and want to list ❤️

[mrsbookburnee Niamh Burnett · Rating 5 out of 5]

Oh, never before has a character captured my heart so much, Esther completely has mine.

I was immediately dawn to Esther, having been in her position, I fully understood her actions and just wanted to give her a hug. The author has captured perfectly how rational thoughts can completely go out the window after loss, it has been done delicately but with also the allowance of some humour.

The Tedettes were hilarious, if not a tad scary! How people can become obsessed with celebs! , Ive never understand how some celebrate the life of someone who doesn’t even know they exist, save the hype for the real life people lol.

This is a must read and needs to be top of your 2026 TBR.

[Brooke · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is all consuming, Esther has stolen my heart! Tanya captures the essence of loss and grief beautifully while showing our sense of rationality can vanish in an instant. The tough topics are broached with elegance also capturing the need for dark humour throughout dark times.
Captivating chaos highlighting how dangerous and addictive the internet can be. Esther’s actions can only be described as morally grey but I wanted to reach in and give her a big hug and to save her from her own misguided decisions.
Unique, uncomfortable and utterly obsessive.
Tanya’s debut is stunning, beautifully devastating, the hype is real!

[Sarah Bloomfield · Rating 4 out of 5]

Many thanks to netgalley, the author and the publisher for approving my request to read this book.

I found Esther is now following you a funny yet also very poignant book which kept me turning the pages. I loved the characters and the plot certainly kept me entertained.

I'd recommend this as a holiday read as it's so easy to read so great to relax with. This is this authors debut novel and I look forward to more from her in future.

[Liv · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was not what I expected, and I think most of my disappointment stems from that rather than because it isn't a good book. Because it is! Well written and focusing on obsession and dark themes, it wasn't the funny, quirky story that the blurb and cover implied. Not for me personally, but I definitely think plenty of people will love it!

I received a copy from the publisher in exchange for an honest review

[Sam Whittaker · Rating 4 out of 5]

One of those books that you need to hold your judgement about till the end.
I really wasn't sure about this at times, the premise seems so far fetched and Esther's behaviour so irrational. She barges through peoples lives, befriending them one minute and dumping them the next, all due to her obsession with with Ted. However, as the back story to her actions become clear it's possible to judge her less harshly and to realise she has had a complete mental breakdown.