What do you think?
You Are Now Old Enough to Hear This
There’s always more to the story.
In the latest middle grade speculative novel from Spontaneous author Aaron Starmer, Roman follows the twisted threads of bizarre family legends and magical secrets to write his own chapter in his peculiar family narrative.
The Toe Beast looms large in the Barnes family lore—a tale concocted by twelve-year-old Roman’s grandpa to explain his missing toe. But Roman has never actually heard the full story, and after his grandpa dies suddenly, it seems like he never will.
That is, until Roman is tasked with clearing out his grandpa’s house, and stumbles upon some strange things. An old mason jar full of formaldehyde, a mysterious handwritten book about a girl and a pack of dogs, a rusty metal bucket with peculiar abilities. And they all tie back to extraordinary secrets from the distant past.
By unraveling even more unbelievable stories that have been hidden from him, Roman is forced to rethink how he fits into his family’s history. Now it’s up to him to see his own story through to the end. Because the Toe Beast was only the beginning . . .
In the latest middle grade speculative novel from Spontaneous author Aaron Starmer, Roman follows the twisted threads of bizarre family legends and magical secrets to write his own chapter in his peculiar family narrative.
The Toe Beast looms large in the Barnes family lore—a tale concocted by twelve-year-old Roman’s grandpa to explain his missing toe. But Roman has never actually heard the full story, and after his grandpa dies suddenly, it seems like he never will.
That is, until Roman is tasked with clearing out his grandpa’s house, and stumbles upon some strange things. An old mason jar full of formaldehyde, a mysterious handwritten book about a girl and a pack of dogs, a rusty metal bucket with peculiar abilities. And they all tie back to extraordinary secrets from the distant past.
By unraveling even more unbelievable stories that have been hidden from him, Roman is forced to rethink how he fits into his family’s history. Now it’s up to him to see his own story through to the end. Because the Toe Beast was only the beginning . . .
288 pages, Hardcover
Published March 24, 2026
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Review of advance copy received from Publisher
Safety is not usually considered a bad thing. But safety, particularly as it pertains to children’s books, is a dangerous thing. I’m eyeing the children’s publishing industry at a squint right now. It doesn’t take much looking to see that in the last year or two we’ve seen a distinct downturn in publishers' willingness to put out books by BIPOC creators, as well as queer titles and books by people from a wider religious spectrum. Then there’s the fact that long hallowed publishing imprints that are practically institutions (specifically Dial and Roaring Brook) have been summarily disappeared without so much as a by-your-leave. Publishers, most particularly BIG publishers with a lot of money, want cash cows. They want easy picks. Books that are guaranteed to do well on the market. And when that happens you see them pulling away from the titles that are actually interesting. The ones that show a wide variety of perspectives and opinions. You also see an avoidance of anything that might be perceived as “too weird.” International imports take a particular blow when that happens. So too do books of homegrown weirdness. But sometimes, even when things look their dullest, there is hope. Hope in the form of Aaron Starmer. He’s the type of children’s author that writes books that wiggle and undulate their way into the crevices and folds of a child’s trusting brain. The Riverman will probably haunt whole generations of children for decades to come. And The Riverman was good, no question, but it now appears that that series was just the warm-up. You Are Now Old Enough to Hear This leans so hard into its own internal logic that it manages to turn its weirdnesses into strengths. Let me put it this way. If you want your child to read books that they’ll forget in a month’s time, hand them pablum. If you want them to think, rethink, and return to a book for the rest of their life? This is what you give.
When you’re the youngest in both your immediate family and out of all your five cousins (not to mention your brother) you hear things. Things you might not want to hear. Roman may be twelve, but for a lot of his life, whenever his grandfather would start to tell the story about “The Toe Beast,” Roman would leave the room. He doesn't know what a Toe Beast is, and he doesn't want to know. And when his grandpa dies under somewhat mysterious circumstances, it’s Roman’s job to tidy up and organize the old man’s house over the summer. Only what starts as a fairly routine job keeps turning up mystery after mystery. Why did his grandfather tell him to never open the locked shed in the backyard? What’s with the jar full of formaldehyde and nothing else? Why was there a strange story in the attic about a girl and some dogs? And that’s all before the rusty bucket appears. The one that seems to seriously freak out his mother. As the mysteries start to link and connect, Roman begins to understand that sometimes your family doesn’t tell you everything because you aren’t old enough. And sometimes your family doesn’t tell you everything because it’s up to you to link their secrets yourself.
There is a line near the beginning of the book which, in its way, explains what Starmer is doing here far better than I ever could. He writes, “For quite some time, Roman had been aware that his mom and dad didn’t know everything, but it was only recently that he had begun to realize that many complicated adult ideas were actually accessible to a boy his age.” Eh voila. The point of it all. What’s curious is that most of that idea is told via metaphor and creepy stories in this book, sure. But there’s also a lot of stark realism. One of those “complicated adult ideas” concerns an incident that happened to his mother when he was young. At the start of the book we learn that she cut herself rather severely and had to be taken to the hospital. It’s only slowly revealed, and never too overtly, that what happened was a lot sadder and, for a small child, scarier than that. That Starmer is capable of balancing both family secrets that involve Toe Beasts on the one hand and self-harm on the other, without either coming in conflict with the other tonally, is a testament to his skill.
I don’t get shocked by middle grade novels for 9-12 year olds all that often these days. As I mentioned before, “safety first” may as well be the American publishing industry’s unofficial motto right now. So I don't expect much. And I wasn’t all that surprised when this book went from a third-person narrative into a kind of script format and then back again. What DID surprise me, unnervingly so, was when, without warning, the book went from that third-person p.o.v. into a first person narrative. I can’t ever remember a book for kids doing that without telegraphing from a mile away that it was going to happen. We’ve been merrily accompanying Roman through his investigations, and then all of a sudden you're in his head. And, miraculously, there’s no confusion about whose head you are in. Starmer’s storytelling is so seamless that you seem to morph from one type of writing into another almost without noticing the change. In fact, I would bet good money that some kids won’t even register the shift. Yet it changes absolutely everything about the read, including the urgency and, to a certain extent, the conclusion.
I also greatly appreciated that Starmer doesn’t explain absolutely everything, but leaves enough clues in the book for kids to draw their own conclusions and feel smart about it. There’s a particular mystery involving an immoral science experience and two scientists that at first seems to be left open-ended, but is beautifully explained in the background all the time. But that’s not all. Like a lot of people from my generation, I suffered a severe blow to my faith that entertainment could be capable of tying up loose mysterious ends after watching the television show LOST (bear with me here). That show gleefully introduced mystery after mystery after mystery, without ever having any kind of intention of explaining what it was all about. As a result, any movie, television show, or book that seems to be doing something similar, rouses an immediate wary side-eye from me. Now I’d read The Riverman, and it ended well, but it wasn’t like this book. The mystery in that was present but singular and sustained. This book is different. It introduces a beast, a bucket, a girl, even a magic eight ball, and by the time you’re even halfway through, you start to figure that there isn’t a way in the world that Starmer will pull off explaining it all. Then, like a magician, he explains his tricks. Only unlike a magician you don’t feel disappointed at all. You’re thrilled and a little bit horrified, which is the best possible response.
By the way, let’s give a big hand to the work Jaime Zollars did with the interstitial illustrations in this book. Zollars isn’t credited on the title page (a fact that surprised me) but her style hits just the right notes with this book. The family tree is innocuous. The Toe Beast’s jar is jarring. The bucket has something desperately wrong with it. And the girl with the dogs? Boy, you just know that there’s something going on there and it cannot be good. Cannot be right. Zollars got the tone of this book right from the start, and deserved a rousing pat on the back for that. Her work actually reminded me of Sophie Blackall’s in When You Reach Me. In fact, this book’s best possible companion is probably that Rebecca Stead classic. In both cases you’ve mysteries that tie-up so beautifully that you want to reread the book the minute you get to the end. Few titles for kids hold such power.
I began this review saying that you should hand this book over to kids, but you know what? I rescind that statement. That’s not the proper way to share this book. You know what you should actually do? Forbid children to read it. Look at them skeptically if they see you with the book and say, “I dunno, kid. This one’s probably a little too much for you.” If they ask too much what?, just shake your head and sigh regretfully, “Maybe when you’re a little older.” Speculate out loud that an older sibling/cousin is probably a better fit. Don’t out-and-out forbid it. Just indicate that maybe they’d be happier with that cheery book about the girl in the lighthouse or that sweet tale of the boy who time travels back to the 80s. Then leave this creepy little number around the house. Maybe they’ll pick it up and just glance at the first page. Maybe they’ll get to Chapter One, with its Gammell-esque illustration of a toe in a jar and the sentence, “Roman’s cousins weren’t afraid of the Toe Beast.” Maybe they’ll read further, and you’ll walk in the room, see them, and say, “Okay... just don’t come running to me if you get nightmares.” Yeah. That might do it. Because for the right kind of kid in the right kind of mindframe, sick of the books that feed them the cute and the squishy, this book is precisely what they need.
I mean, it’s squishy too. Just in… another way.
When you’re the youngest in both your immediate family and out of all your five cousins (not to mention your brother) you hear things. Things you might not want to hear. Roman may be twelve, but for a lot of his life, whenever his grandfather would start to tell the story about “The Toe Beast,” Roman would leave the room. He doesn't know what a Toe Beast is, and he doesn't want to know. And when his grandpa dies under somewhat mysterious circumstances, it’s Roman’s job to tidy up and organize the old man’s house over the summer. Only what starts as a fairly routine job keeps turning up mystery after mystery. Why did his grandfather tell him to never open the locked shed in the backyard? What’s with the jar full of formaldehyde and nothing else? Why was there a strange story in the attic about a girl and some dogs? And that’s all before the rusty bucket appears. The one that seems to seriously freak out his mother. As the mysteries start to link and connect, Roman begins to understand that sometimes your family doesn’t tell you everything because you aren’t old enough. And sometimes your family doesn’t tell you everything because it’s up to you to link their secrets yourself.
There is a line near the beginning of the book which, in its way, explains what Starmer is doing here far better than I ever could. He writes, “For quite some time, Roman had been aware that his mom and dad didn’t know everything, but it was only recently that he had begun to realize that many complicated adult ideas were actually accessible to a boy his age.” Eh voila. The point of it all. What’s curious is that most of that idea is told via metaphor and creepy stories in this book, sure. But there’s also a lot of stark realism. One of those “complicated adult ideas” concerns an incident that happened to his mother when he was young. At the start of the book we learn that she cut herself rather severely and had to be taken to the hospital. It’s only slowly revealed, and never too overtly, that what happened was a lot sadder and, for a small child, scarier than that. That Starmer is capable of balancing both family secrets that involve Toe Beasts on the one hand and self-harm on the other, without either coming in conflict with the other tonally, is a testament to his skill.
I don’t get shocked by middle grade novels for 9-12 year olds all that often these days. As I mentioned before, “safety first” may as well be the American publishing industry’s unofficial motto right now. So I don't expect much. And I wasn’t all that surprised when this book went from a third-person narrative into a kind of script format and then back again. What DID surprise me, unnervingly so, was when, without warning, the book went from that third-person p.o.v. into a first person narrative. I can’t ever remember a book for kids doing that without telegraphing from a mile away that it was going to happen. We’ve been merrily accompanying Roman through his investigations, and then all of a sudden you're in his head. And, miraculously, there’s no confusion about whose head you are in. Starmer’s storytelling is so seamless that you seem to morph from one type of writing into another almost without noticing the change. In fact, I would bet good money that some kids won’t even register the shift. Yet it changes absolutely everything about the read, including the urgency and, to a certain extent, the conclusion.
I also greatly appreciated that Starmer doesn’t explain absolutely everything, but leaves enough clues in the book for kids to draw their own conclusions and feel smart about it. There’s a particular mystery involving an immoral science experience and two scientists that at first seems to be left open-ended, but is beautifully explained in the background all the time. But that’s not all. Like a lot of people from my generation, I suffered a severe blow to my faith that entertainment could be capable of tying up loose mysterious ends after watching the television show LOST (bear with me here). That show gleefully introduced mystery after mystery after mystery, without ever having any kind of intention of explaining what it was all about. As a result, any movie, television show, or book that seems to be doing something similar, rouses an immediate wary side-eye from me. Now I’d read The Riverman, and it ended well, but it wasn’t like this book. The mystery in that was present but singular and sustained. This book is different. It introduces a beast, a bucket, a girl, even a magic eight ball, and by the time you’re even halfway through, you start to figure that there isn’t a way in the world that Starmer will pull off explaining it all. Then, like a magician, he explains his tricks. Only unlike a magician you don’t feel disappointed at all. You’re thrilled and a little bit horrified, which is the best possible response.
By the way, let’s give a big hand to the work Jaime Zollars did with the interstitial illustrations in this book. Zollars isn’t credited on the title page (a fact that surprised me) but her style hits just the right notes with this book. The family tree is innocuous. The Toe Beast’s jar is jarring. The bucket has something desperately wrong with it. And the girl with the dogs? Boy, you just know that there’s something going on there and it cannot be good. Cannot be right. Zollars got the tone of this book right from the start, and deserved a rousing pat on the back for that. Her work actually reminded me of Sophie Blackall’s in When You Reach Me. In fact, this book’s best possible companion is probably that Rebecca Stead classic. In both cases you’ve mysteries that tie-up so beautifully that you want to reread the book the minute you get to the end. Few titles for kids hold such power.
I began this review saying that you should hand this book over to kids, but you know what? I rescind that statement. That’s not the proper way to share this book. You know what you should actually do? Forbid children to read it. Look at them skeptically if they see you with the book and say, “I dunno, kid. This one’s probably a little too much for you.” If they ask too much what?, just shake your head and sigh regretfully, “Maybe when you’re a little older.” Speculate out loud that an older sibling/cousin is probably a better fit. Don’t out-and-out forbid it. Just indicate that maybe they’d be happier with that cheery book about the girl in the lighthouse or that sweet tale of the boy who time travels back to the 80s. Then leave this creepy little number around the house. Maybe they’ll pick it up and just glance at the first page. Maybe they’ll get to Chapter One, with its Gammell-esque illustration of a toe in a jar and the sentence, “Roman’s cousins weren’t afraid of the Toe Beast.” Maybe they’ll read further, and you’ll walk in the room, see them, and say, “Okay... just don’t come running to me if you get nightmares.” Yeah. That might do it. Because for the right kind of kid in the right kind of mindframe, sick of the books that feed them the cute and the squishy, this book is precisely what they need.
I mean, it’s squishy too. Just in… another way.
May 17, 2026
This was like if David Lynch wrote a children’s book
April 18, 2026
This is so weird and trippy and mind-boggling and awesome! I feel like I couldn’t even begin to explain it without talking for at least an hour, so you might as well just read it for yourself.
September 16, 2026
Roman has never wanted to hear the story of how his grandfather lost his toe—a story that has taken on almost folkloric gravitas among his older cousins and big brother. But after his grandfather’s sudden death, Roman is tasked with cleaning out his house. While he was alive, his grandfather warned Roman never to go into the shed. The shed with a lock on the door.
Roman was never tempted. But then noises start coming from inside. Good thing it’s locked.
And then, under a large box, Roman finds an envelope labeled “In Case of Emergency.” Inside the envelope is a key.
Well, what would you do?
This book is totally bonkers and so, so much fun. It is unlike any middle-grade book I’ve ever read. Part Alice in Wonderland, part Cold Comfort Farm—and, yes, there is definitely something nasty in the woodshed. There are so many strange and jaw-dropping moments, all winding their way toward a pretty satisfying finale.
I would be absolutely thrilled to see this one end up with Newbery gold.
I did dock it a star because, in retrospect, I wished a few of the dangling threads had been explained a little better. But this book does an excellent job of tying almost every weird little twisty thread into a surprisingly satisfying knot.
52 Book Club26: 52) Published in 2026
Roman was never tempted. But then noises start coming from inside. Good thing it’s locked.
And then, under a large box, Roman finds an envelope labeled “In Case of Emergency.” Inside the envelope is a key.
Well, what would you do?
This book is totally bonkers and so, so much fun. It is unlike any middle-grade book I’ve ever read. Part Alice in Wonderland, part Cold Comfort Farm—and, yes, there is definitely something nasty in the woodshed. There are so many strange and jaw-dropping moments, all winding their way toward a pretty satisfying finale.
I would be absolutely thrilled to see this one end up with Newbery gold.
I did dock it a star because, in retrospect, I wished a few of the dangling threads had been explained a little better. But this book does an excellent job of tying almost every weird little twisty thread into a surprisingly satisfying knot.
52 Book Club26: 52) Published in 2026
Read
April 26, 2026Every family has secrets; Roman’s might be supernatural.
🦶
After his grandpa’s sudden death, Roman is left with more questions than answers, especially about the legendary “Toe Beast” story tied to his grandpa’s missing toe. While cleaning out the house, he uncovers strange objects and a mysterious story that reveal long-buried family secrets. As Roman pieces together the truth, he begins to understand his place in a much bigger, and stranger, family history.
👹
Creepy, weird, and definitely leaning into that middle grade speculative fiction vibe. It was a bit too strange for me personally, but I can absolutely see middle schoolers eating this up. It’s the kind of eerie, quirky story that will hook readers who like their books a little offbeat and mysterious. Fans of Stranger Things and Patrick Ness’s The Nest will enjoy this title too.
CW: death, grief, animal death, animal cruelty
🦶
After his grandpa’s sudden death, Roman is left with more questions than answers, especially about the legendary “Toe Beast” story tied to his grandpa’s missing toe. While cleaning out the house, he uncovers strange objects and a mysterious story that reveal long-buried family secrets. As Roman pieces together the truth, he begins to understand his place in a much bigger, and stranger, family history.
👹
Creepy, weird, and definitely leaning into that middle grade speculative fiction vibe. It was a bit too strange for me personally, but I can absolutely see middle schoolers eating this up. It’s the kind of eerie, quirky story that will hook readers who like their books a little offbeat and mysterious. Fans of Stranger Things and Patrick Ness’s The Nest will enjoy this title too.
CW: death, grief, animal death, animal cruelty
July 12, 2026
This book is deeply weird, like an episode of The Twilight Zone. It’s so mysterious that I couldn’t put it down and stayed up very late finishing it.
I want to echo what Betsy Bird said in her review: the best way to get kids to read this book is tell them you’re not sure if they’re ready for it! Perfectly apropos.
This reminded me a lot of David Lubar’s creepy stories. There are also aspects that made me think of one of my favorite books of all time, When You Reach Me. I’ve heard some say they like this for the Newbery, but I wasn’t super impressed by the quality of the writing. This book is exceptionally creative and moody. But there were some tedious bits dedicated to Roman’s inner turmoil that slowed down the story. However, I might feel that way because I was trying to finish it at 1 a.m.!
I want to echo what Betsy Bird said in her review: the best way to get kids to read this book is tell them you’re not sure if they’re ready for it! Perfectly apropos.
This reminded me a lot of David Lubar’s creepy stories. There are also aspects that made me think of one of my favorite books of all time, When You Reach Me. I’ve heard some say they like this for the Newbery, but I wasn’t super impressed by the quality of the writing. This book is exceptionally creative and moody. But there were some tedious bits dedicated to Roman’s inner turmoil that slowed down the story. However, I might feel that way because I was trying to finish it at 1 a.m.!
March 31, 2026
Full disclosure: I adore weird books. Every now and then I want a book to twist, flip, throw me into a tizzy.
YOU ARE NOW OLD ENOUGH TO HEAR THIS checks all the boxes. Targeted for middle grade readers, this fast-paced novel is about Roman and his extended family history.
Grandpa Henry finally tells Roman the tale of the Toe Beast, (you’re not ready) but is it really true? It sends Roman on a quest to understand where he came from.
I kept imagining how fun it would be to read this aloud to 6th and 7th graders and how the suspense would drive them mad. The author is so adept at understanding the middle grade reader and how it feels to be no longer a child, yet not quite an adult.
I honestly couldn’t do anything until I finished this book, and that’s just the best, isn’t it?
If you loved THE NEST by Kenneth Oppel or the show Stranger Things, you’ll love this book.
YOU ARE NOW OLD ENOUGH TO HEAR THIS checks all the boxes. Targeted for middle grade readers, this fast-paced novel is about Roman and his extended family history.
Grandpa Henry finally tells Roman the tale of the Toe Beast, (you’re not ready) but is it really true? It sends Roman on a quest to understand where he came from.
I kept imagining how fun it would be to read this aloud to 6th and 7th graders and how the suspense would drive them mad. The author is so adept at understanding the middle grade reader and how it feels to be no longer a child, yet not quite an adult.
I honestly couldn’t do anything until I finished this book, and that’s just the best, isn’t it?
If you loved THE NEST by Kenneth Oppel or the show Stranger Things, you’ll love this book.
July 30, 2026
You Are Now Old Enough to Hear This was a fun, twisty-turny book. Full disclosure, I’m 51, but I read a lot of YA and middle grade — not just because I am an aide in a preK-8th grade library, but because there are a lot of really great books being written for kids, tweens, and teens (I’m also mom to a 12-year-old so I spend a lot of time with tweens!).
I enjoyed being surprised multiple times — every time I would think I could see where the story was going, I’d be surprised again. The book felt a little light on characterization generally other than Roman, but ramped things up in the last 25%. It was satisfying (as the kids say) to see the different threads truly start to come together.
I’ll keep details to myself because I think readers will benefit from going in pretty cold. But I’m adding this to our library’s wishlist for sure — the creepy, mysterious vibes will appeal to our kids who are watching Stranger Things and the like.
Many thanks to Netgalley, the publisher, and the author for the advanced reading copy!
I enjoyed being surprised multiple times — every time I would think I could see where the story was going, I’d be surprised again. The book felt a little light on characterization generally other than Roman, but ramped things up in the last 25%. It was satisfying (as the kids say) to see the different threads truly start to come together.
I’ll keep details to myself because I think readers will benefit from going in pretty cold. But I’m adding this to our library’s wishlist for sure — the creepy, mysterious vibes will appeal to our kids who are watching Stranger Things and the like.
Many thanks to Netgalley, the publisher, and the author for the advanced reading copy!
June 8, 2026
What a strange, wacky, “trippy” story. Time travel , a mysterious bucket, a toe creature , dogs that talk and more are all here. It’s a story about family and wishes and memories. If I were a 10-13 year old boy I’d probably give it 5 stars, but a lot of this weird story was mostly lost on this adult! Story is left wide open for a sequel.
(I read this on a kindle. Think I’d have been better reading a physical copy that has a family tree in the beginning. The one on the kindle was hard to make out. Understanding the family tree was essential to this story .)
(I read this on a kindle. Think I’d have been better reading a physical copy that has a family tree in the beginning. The one on the kindle was hard to make out. Understanding the family tree was essential to this story .)
May 30, 2026
Some of my students will find this one weird, and some will absolutely love it. YOU ARE NOW OLD ENOUGH TO HEAR THIS is one of those bizarre tales that seems too odd at first but then pulls you in the more you read. Middle schoolers who love quirky and break-the-mold stories will love this one.
Many thanks to NetGalley for the digital review copy.
Many thanks to NetGalley for the digital review copy.
May 4, 2026
Roman is the youngest grandchild in his family, which means that he never got to know his grandma. It also means he has the least to do, and so is tasked with cleaning out his grandpa's house after his death. Roman finds an odd box with an odd jar and an odd story in the attic which takes him on a twisted and unexpected journey through the history of his family.
Very, very weird. But it was a page turner and I did enjoy it.
Very, very weird. But it was a page turner and I did enjoy it.
June 16, 2026
What an orginal, strange, and delightful story! I think it's better if you no nothing going in, so all I'm going to say is that I was somewhat bewildered as I read, but as soon as I finished, I wanted to restart at the beginning again. It is definitely giving When You Reach Me vibes.
September 20, 2026
I'm still thinking about this one. I loved how it all came together, but there were many times while reading when I just thought it all was very strange. I'm curious what kids will think about this one.
2026 52 Book challenge: #52 published in 2026
2026 52 Book challenge: #52 published in 2026
June 15, 2026
Oo this book was delightful—it walks the line of creepy very nicely, and it did give me those brothers grimm fairy tale vibes.
August 27, 2026
wild. unexpected. thought about giving it up a few times when it was really odd, but pushed on for the payoff.
October 1, 2026
I loved this book because like every chapter there was a plot twist. How what you originally thought was the main character disappeared within two chapters. The plot twist made me want to keep reading the book. The suspense was perfect it kept me reading. I felt like I could t put the book down.
August 29, 2026
Monsters | Time travel | Intricately plotted (appeal terms from NoveList) - Emma
July 1, 2026
Funky little book to listen to with my 8 year old son. He LOVED it and was cool to see him getting into a little mystery/thriller.
September 12, 2026
I really liked this book’s atmosphere and weirdness, and was with it right up until the end, but it left a lot of plot threads hanging. I was disappointed. I did love the part about the magic 8-ball. I also liked reading a children’s book that had realistic and complicated adult characters who weren’t just part of the background.
Some things I was left wondering (maybe the resolutions were there and I missed them?):
…big spoilers…
What was the deal with Tiger the “dog”?
What did Tiger’s poem mean?
Why did the bald dog jump into the pool and drown?
What was the black fruit?
Where did the bucket come from?
What kind of experiments were Doz and Zod / the Dodds running in their basement??
Why did Roman’s mom get cut on her arm? Was she trying to kill herself? If so, that is pretty dark and comes out of nowhere with little follow up in a book for kids.
I was also slightly annoyed at several characters’ complete lack of curiosity. Are you telling me there are kids in this world who would pick up an envelope that mysteriously says “you are now old enough to hear this” and just leave it unopened?
Some things I was left wondering (maybe the resolutions were there and I missed them?):
…big spoilers…
What was the deal with Tiger the “dog”?
What did Tiger’s poem mean?
Why did the bald dog jump into the pool and drown?
What was the black fruit?
Where did the bucket come from?
What kind of experiments were Doz and Zod / the Dodds running in their basement??
Why did Roman’s mom get cut on her arm? Was she trying to kill herself? If so, that is pretty dark and comes out of nowhere with little follow up in a book for kids.
I was also slightly annoyed at several characters’ complete lack of curiosity. Are you telling me there are kids in this world who would pick up an envelope that mysteriously says “you are now old enough to hear this” and just leave it unopened?
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
March 31, 2026
What a wild swirling ride of clones, magic 8 balls, wishes, dogs, time travel, and family trees. I’ll be reading this to my almost 10 year old soon, hope she loves it as much as I do!
August 9, 2026
Aaron Starmer’s You are Now Old Enough to Hear This is a middle grade book; it’s a fantasy, I think, or at least a very strange story. I didn’t understand it. Is it a book that you have to be twelve to understand? Do twelve-year-olds understand it?
After Grandpa Henry dies, twelve-year-old Roman makes several discoveries when he helps clean out Grandpa’s house. He learns the family story of the toe beast, which he had not been old enough for earlier, he finds strange bucket, a duplicate grandfather Henry and a manuscript about a girl and her dogs.
His discoveries made too many threads for me to follow. Apparently, they all came together, but I didn’t believe any of them, or the way they came together, if they really did. Should I? Will middle graders believe them? Will this book win the Newbery Award? I hope not.
You Are Now Old Enough was a monthly selection of the Goodreads’ 2027 Mock Newbery group.
After Grandpa Henry dies, twelve-year-old Roman makes several discoveries when he helps clean out Grandpa’s house. He learns the family story of the toe beast, which he had not been old enough for earlier, he finds strange bucket, a duplicate grandfather Henry and a manuscript about a girl and her dogs.
His discoveries made too many threads for me to follow. Apparently, they all came together, but I didn’t believe any of them, or the way they came together, if they really did. Should I? Will middle graders believe them? Will this book win the Newbery Award? I hope not.
You Are Now Old Enough was a monthly selection of the Goodreads’ 2027 Mock Newbery group.
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March 31, 2026This was without a doubt the most unusual book I have read. A true mystery type format that makes it hard to put down and you just have to keep turning the page to see what happens next.
It starts with a family that has some very unusual stories to tell. One- the Toe Beast- is definitely the most unique story I have read. To think a toe might grow- feed- and turn into a clone of the person it was cut off of- ( sound a bit weird?) To a time traveling bucket- to a girl who can grant wishes- to dogs that can speak- To saving someone who is so sick they aren't going to make it?
This is truly a remarkable feat of writing- To keep all the time lines straight- to keep the story going through the cousins and continued family- and to think- there might be more to tell since the boys went back to talk to their grandma. Hoping there is another book to follow.
It starts with a family that has some very unusual stories to tell. One- the Toe Beast- is definitely the most unique story I have read. To think a toe might grow- feed- and turn into a clone of the person it was cut off of- ( sound a bit weird?) To a time traveling bucket- to a girl who can grant wishes- to dogs that can speak- To saving someone who is so sick they aren't going to make it?
This is truly a remarkable feat of writing- To keep all the time lines straight- to keep the story going through the cousins and continued family- and to think- there might be more to tell since the boys went back to talk to their grandma. Hoping there is another book to follow.
April 23, 2026
At first I liked this but thought it might be too similar to The Riverman. Then when it described “the mulligan theory”, I thought why shouldn’t Starmer be allowed a Riverman do-over? Then I thought there actually is another well-known book, not by Starmer, that is the true comparable here, but I can’t say what it is without spoiling things.
At one point, maybe because of the chapter titles, I also weirdly thought of Stead’s A Potion, A Powder. . . which I recently read. Among other things, both are perhaps not as original as one might first think, but rare enough.
At one point, maybe because of the chapter titles, I also weirdly thought of Stead’s A Potion, A Powder. . . which I recently read. Among other things, both are perhaps not as original as one might first think, but rare enough.
June 23, 2026
3.25 rounded to a 3
Mock Newbery read. Another one everyone claimed you'd "love when you read it." I should've trusted my instincts when I DNF'd it the two times before I finally finished. I was bored. The story doesn't make sense. There's some selective memory/forgetting. There's a lot of intertwined loops that don't make sense in time. The story is going to appeal to a VERY specific kid, in the same way Undead Fox does. I didn't care for it.
Mock Newbery read. Another one everyone claimed you'd "love when you read it." I should've trusted my instincts when I DNF'd it the two times before I finally finished. I was bored. The story doesn't make sense. There's some selective memory/forgetting. There's a lot of intertwined loops that don't make sense in time. The story is going to appeal to a VERY specific kid, in the same way Undead Fox does. I didn't care for it.
March 29, 2026
My brain is spinning. I don’t know how someone invents a story that does all the things this story is able to do. This is a new favorite, and I’ll be recommending it to everyone I know. Super weird and sad and hopeful in the exact ways I needed it to be.
April 11, 2026
I don’t know how to rate this one. It was absolutely bizarre - I don’t think I liked it at all but I couldn’t put it down . . .
July 29, 2026
As a fan of The Riverman, as soon as I heard Aaron Starmer had a new weird speculative coming-of-age middle grade novel out, I HAD to read it. I really enjoyed several parts of this but it wasn't quite as perfect as The Riverman. Which maybe nothing can be.
- I loved how weird this was. It's like a patchwork or collage where every single element seems wholly indistinct and yet it all slots together perfectly in the end. Maybe it's just that I'm not reading them so often but it feels like there are no other middle grade novels like this (ESPECIALLY the first person plural chapter). There's toes in jars, buckets, dogs, family history, family secrets, --and just like in The Riverman, there's this realization that magic is still real as you grow up, that maybe growing up is what it takes to reveal the magic. I think this is so lovely because you often feel, as a child, that you grow out of magic, that once you never get invited on a quest or to wizard school then it's all over, but there still can be a more everyday magic like this.
- The last chapters made me cry
- I really liked the ending, in that
- On the other hand--I wanted a little more resolution on the Toe Beast situation. It feels like this strange concept which turns up to drive the first section and then disappears. There's a little mention at the end, and I liked
- I didn't love this stylistically like I did The Riverman. The chapters in the fourth section in first-person present from Roman were kind of offputting in some way? though I loved the Girl and Her Dogs chapter. I think this got a little too structurally ambitious for a middle grade novel. Like sometimes first person, sometimes third.....sometimes I think Aaron Starmer wants to write artsy litfic from children's perspectives but doesn't know it yet.
- Gunnar being described as boring, adult, practical, unknowable in the way of the oldest cousin made me a bit sick because he's literally my exact age. Born in 2004. Is this how my second cousins born in 2014 see me???????
- I loved how weird this was. It's like a patchwork or collage where every single element seems wholly indistinct and yet it all slots together perfectly in the end. Maybe it's just that I'm not reading them so often but it feels like there are no other middle grade novels like this (ESPECIALLY the first person plural chapter). There's toes in jars, buckets, dogs, family history, family secrets, --and just like in The Riverman, there's this realization that magic is still real as you grow up, that maybe growing up is what it takes to reveal the magic. I think this is so lovely because you often feel, as a child, that you grow out of magic, that once you never get invited on a quest or to wizard school then it's all over, but there still can be a more everyday magic like this.
- The last chapters made me cry
- I really liked the ending, in that
- On the other hand--I wanted a little more resolution on the Toe Beast situation. It feels like this strange concept which turns up to drive the first section and then disappears. There's a little mention at the end, and I liked
- I didn't love this stylistically like I did The Riverman. The chapters in the fourth section in first-person present from Roman were kind of offputting in some way? though I loved the Girl and Her Dogs chapter. I think this got a little too structurally ambitious for a middle grade novel. Like sometimes first person, sometimes third.....sometimes I think Aaron Starmer wants to write artsy litfic from children's perspectives but doesn't know it yet.
- Gunnar being described as boring, adult, practical, unknowable in the way of the oldest cousin made me a bit sick because he's literally my exact age. Born in 2004. Is this how my second cousins born in 2014 see me???????
Review of advance copy received from Publisher
What worked:
The author is a master storyteller, weaving several of them together in this book. Roman has never heard the entire story of his grandfather’s missing toe, and readers can expect the unexpected from events surrounding the grandfather’s death. Roman is surprised by his grandfather’s terrified face while padlocking a shed, and the man dies the very next day. However, Roman is shocked when he later finds his grandfather locked in that same shed. A series of short, creepy stories follows, and readers must piece together new information to make sense of the overall plot.
The short stories are divided into sections, so they stand out from the overall tale. This strategy helps young readers focus on them separately, helping with comprehension. The book opens with the events mentioned above, but it later describes the full story of the Toe Monster, The Girl, and the bucket. The bucket becomes a very important part of the plot, so readers will need to pay attention. The author wraps things up by alternating points of view between Roman and The Girl. These chapters provide a full explanation of how everything ties together, and reader imagination is required. The stories of the bucket and The Girl despict a family rite of passage, and the entire plot gives Roman and readers things to think about.
The Girl is the most intriguing character. Her name isn’t mentioned until late in the book, so she projects an aura of mystery. She’s always accompanied by dogs, and many family pets choose to join her. She takes over all the businesses in a small town, so readers will ponder her possible motives. On the other hand, she sometimes sounds lost and alone, causing readers to develop empathy for her character. A Tasmanian Tiger called Tiger is always nearby, and this extinct animal can talk and grant wishes. These two characters are at the heart of the plot, and their stories are revealed in the end.
What didn’t work as well:
The short stories are quite peculiar, so readers must be tolerant and open to strangeness. The ending will still have readers scratching their heads, trying to piece everything together.
The final verdict:
Hopefully, you understand this book is for active readers and requires mental engagement. The ending may leave readers with some unanswered questions, but overall, I recommend you try this book for yourself.
The author is a master storyteller, weaving several of them together in this book. Roman has never heard the entire story of his grandfather’s missing toe, and readers can expect the unexpected from events surrounding the grandfather’s death. Roman is surprised by his grandfather’s terrified face while padlocking a shed, and the man dies the very next day. However, Roman is shocked when he later finds his grandfather locked in that same shed. A series of short, creepy stories follows, and readers must piece together new information to make sense of the overall plot.
The short stories are divided into sections, so they stand out from the overall tale. This strategy helps young readers focus on them separately, helping with comprehension. The book opens with the events mentioned above, but it later describes the full story of the Toe Monster, The Girl, and the bucket. The bucket becomes a very important part of the plot, so readers will need to pay attention. The author wraps things up by alternating points of view between Roman and The Girl. These chapters provide a full explanation of how everything ties together, and reader imagination is required. The stories of the bucket and The Girl despict a family rite of passage, and the entire plot gives Roman and readers things to think about.
The Girl is the most intriguing character. Her name isn’t mentioned until late in the book, so she projects an aura of mystery. She’s always accompanied by dogs, and many family pets choose to join her. She takes over all the businesses in a small town, so readers will ponder her possible motives. On the other hand, she sometimes sounds lost and alone, causing readers to develop empathy for her character. A Tasmanian Tiger called Tiger is always nearby, and this extinct animal can talk and grant wishes. These two characters are at the heart of the plot, and their stories are revealed in the end.
What didn’t work as well:
The short stories are quite peculiar, so readers must be tolerant and open to strangeness. The ending will still have readers scratching their heads, trying to piece everything together.
The final verdict:
Hopefully, you understand this book is for active readers and requires mental engagement. The ending may leave readers with some unanswered questions, but overall, I recommend you try this book for yourself.
July 6, 2026
The protagonist in this mysterious middle-grade novel is 12-year-old Roman Barnes. As the youngest of six cousins, Roman’s never heard Grandpa Henry’s story of the Toe Beast, a tale concocted to explain his missing toe. Roman knows of the story but has never heard it because he’s not been old enough. After a strange rant about the Toe Beast, Grandpa Henry dies suddenly, and it seems like Roman never will hear it.
In the weeks after the funeral, Roman is sent to pack up his grandpa’s belongings, and he stumbles upon some strange things: a mason jar that stinks of formaldehyde, a mysterious handwritten notebook containing a cryptic story about a girl and her pack of dogs, a rusty metal bucket with peculiar abilities. All of these things tie back to extraordinary secrets from the distant past, but none of it seems to add up. Ultimately a series of clues leads Roman to a key that opens his grandfather’s tool shed, where he makes a seemingly impossible discovery.
This multigenerational tale of family love and lore is more than twisty and strange. It mutates as you read it. By unraveling the unbelievable stories that have been hidden from him, Roman is forced to rethink how he fits into his family’s history. Now it’s up to him to see his own story through to the end.
The author piles oddity on oddity, switching narrative modes from third to first person and past to present tense and back. Starmer’s brand of whimsy is like that of Roald Dahl, with genuine danger and grief always on the horizon. The story is for people who like old-fashioned storytelling as Starmer weaves all of the plot strands together, while affirming the power of family, friendship and fellowship against the terrors of isolation.
There were several occasions when it appeared the story would become very dark like a Stephen King horror novel, but then some small change would send the story in another direction. This would likely frustrate a reluctant reader as one must have patience while reading a thought-provoking story as well as the ability to both change gears quickly and suspend reality. 3.5
In the weeks after the funeral, Roman is sent to pack up his grandpa’s belongings, and he stumbles upon some strange things: a mason jar that stinks of formaldehyde, a mysterious handwritten notebook containing a cryptic story about a girl and her pack of dogs, a rusty metal bucket with peculiar abilities. All of these things tie back to extraordinary secrets from the distant past, but none of it seems to add up. Ultimately a series of clues leads Roman to a key that opens his grandfather’s tool shed, where he makes a seemingly impossible discovery.
This multigenerational tale of family love and lore is more than twisty and strange. It mutates as you read it. By unraveling the unbelievable stories that have been hidden from him, Roman is forced to rethink how he fits into his family’s history. Now it’s up to him to see his own story through to the end.
The author piles oddity on oddity, switching narrative modes from third to first person and past to present tense and back. Starmer’s brand of whimsy is like that of Roald Dahl, with genuine danger and grief always on the horizon. The story is for people who like old-fashioned storytelling as Starmer weaves all of the plot strands together, while affirming the power of family, friendship and fellowship against the terrors of isolation.
There were several occasions when it appeared the story would become very dark like a Stephen King horror novel, but then some small change would send the story in another direction. This would likely frustrate a reluctant reader as one must have patience while reading a thought-provoking story as well as the ability to both change gears quickly and suspend reality. 3.5
April 28, 2026
I feel like I left a piece of my heart in the pages of YOU ARE NOW OLD ENOUGH TO HEAR THIS by Aaron Starmer. It has family secrets. And time travel. And I was right there with Roman in his journey from loneliness to finding his place in his family narrative.
It’s a puzzle, requiring careful reading. At times I stopped, saying to myself, now, wait a minute, and I’d go back to find something, a hint.
It’s unsettling - the town taken over by The Girl and her dogs, the attic in Grandpa Henry’s house, the locked shed…
It begins with One Quick Thing;
“On the eve of his twelfth birthday, Roman Barnes made a wish. Alone in his room, tucked under his covers, he softly said the following words into the dark: “I wish I had someone to talk to, someone who understands me and what I’m going through, someone who will tell me everything is gonna be okay.”
The next morning, he received a gift.
“Oh, a magic eight ball,” he said as he sat cross- legged on the sofa, opening a box covered in shiny silver paper. “You ask it ‘yes or no’ questions and it tells your fortune, right?”
“Yep, just give it a shake and voilà, the answer will appear,” Roman’s dad said, and then he turned to Roman’s mom. “Where’d you find that?”
She shrugged. “Wasn’t me.”
“Must’ve been from his real parents,” Roman’s brother, Alex, said. “I guess now’s as good a time as ever to reveal the family secret. You’re adopted, Roman.”
“Not true and definitely not funny, Alex,” Roman’s mom said.
Roman was used to this sort of teasing from his brother, so he focused on the magic eight ball instead. He asked it, “Will you be nice to me?”
I can’t stop thinking about this story. It haunts me, in a good way. It’s distinguished in several ways. If you are doing any early #MockNewbery reading for 2026/2027, add this to your list, it’s on my #NewberyContender list.
It’s a puzzle, requiring careful reading. At times I stopped, saying to myself, now, wait a minute, and I’d go back to find something, a hint.
It’s unsettling - the town taken over by The Girl and her dogs, the attic in Grandpa Henry’s house, the locked shed…
It begins with One Quick Thing;
“On the eve of his twelfth birthday, Roman Barnes made a wish. Alone in his room, tucked under his covers, he softly said the following words into the dark: “I wish I had someone to talk to, someone who understands me and what I’m going through, someone who will tell me everything is gonna be okay.”
The next morning, he received a gift.
“Oh, a magic eight ball,” he said as he sat cross- legged on the sofa, opening a box covered in shiny silver paper. “You ask it ‘yes or no’ questions and it tells your fortune, right?”
“Yep, just give it a shake and voilà, the answer will appear,” Roman’s dad said, and then he turned to Roman’s mom. “Where’d you find that?”
She shrugged. “Wasn’t me.”
“Must’ve been from his real parents,” Roman’s brother, Alex, said. “I guess now’s as good a time as ever to reveal the family secret. You’re adopted, Roman.”
“Not true and definitely not funny, Alex,” Roman’s mom said.
Roman was used to this sort of teasing from his brother, so he focused on the magic eight ball instead. He asked it, “Will you be nice to me?”
I can’t stop thinking about this story. It haunts me, in a good way. It’s distinguished in several ways. If you are doing any early #MockNewbery reading for 2026/2027, add this to your list, it’s on my #NewberyContender list.
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