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Mark Twain's Guide to Diet, Exercise, Beauty, Fashion, Investment, Romance, Health and Happiness

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This collection of Mark Twain quotes presents the best of the curmudgeonly writer's thoughts on diet, exercise, medicine, smoking, drinking, romance, parenting, old age, fashion, finances, politics, and stress management. Curated by a well-known Twain expert and mining lesser-known texts, speeches, and notebooks, it's the perfect gift for anyone who's had enough of Gwyneth's self-righteous advice and the ramblings of the blogosphere. "Be respectful to your superiors, if you have any."—from an April 15, 1882 speech "Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond; cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education."—from Pudd'nhead Wilson "The less a man knows the bigger the noise he makes and the higher the salary he commands."—from "How I Edited an Agricultural Paper"

208 pages, Hardcover

First published May 18, 2015

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Mark Dawidziak

60 books94 followers

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Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews
Profile Image for Brian Carey.
21 reviews1 follower
August 10, 2023
Fun and interesting quotes, descriptions, and anecdotal stories.
Profile Image for Nathan Albright.
4,488 reviews160 followers
May 10, 2018
Before wandering around my library working for books recently, I did not know who Mark Dawidziak was, but apparently he has performed as Mark Twain for a long time and is considered by some (including midbrow popular historian Ken Burns) to be an expert on Mark Twain [1].  This book is certainly entertaining, but it is a miscellaneous set of writings that will likely not greatly tax the reader.  As a prolific writer, Mark Twain said some things that appear contradictory and he spoke on a wide variety of subjects in the guise of his literature, his voluminous travel writing, as well as his public speeches.  Like many writers, Mark Twain tended to collect a great many quotes attached his name that others may have created, which adds some layers of interest to any collection of quotes because of the textual criticism that is necessary to uncover where and when Twain said something in his body of work which included unfinished works, and the author does a good job at introducing various subject matters and in presenting the wit and wisdom of Mark Twain on these matters.

The book itself is about two hundred pages and consists of various quotations taken generally out of context from Twain's writings about a long list of subjects mostly referred to in the title.  After an introduction from the editor, the contents of this book include twenty chapters of various advice dispensed by Twain either in fiction or nonfiction or in spoken talks on the following subjects:  exercise (1), diet (2), sleep & rest (3), smoking (4), drinking (5), curing sickness (6), stress management (7), anger management (8), maintaining a positive outlook (9), beauty tips (10), fashion (11), finances and investment (12), experience and education (13), political philosophy (14), religion (15), surviving childhood (16), romance and marriage (17), parenthood (18), old age and wisdom (19), death and the afterlife (20).  After this the book contains some acknowledgements and notes about the author and his diverse body of writings, and the quotes in general do a good job at presenting Twain as someone who was witty and who (like many writers) tended to hit on the same topics over and over again.  Whether or not one would want to take the advice of the author is one matter, but Twain was certainly an interesting fellow and there was a lot that he did that could be viewed favorably by many readers.

Overall, a book like this helps one know what an editor/compiler thinks is worthy of remembering, which is interesting enough, and also certain aspects of Twain's life and behavior.  From these quotes we learn that Twain had a terrible temper but controlled it most of the time, was quite a lazy person in terms of physical labor but had an able mind and was a productive and prolific writer, similar to myself in that regard, and that he was not very good at investments but was a very honorable person when it came to his debts, even at great cost to his own health and well-being.  By and large, although there is a considerable amount I would disagree with Twain about, there is much to enjoy here and if this is not a rigorously academic work it should at least introduce many serious readers to the scholarly apparatus of Twainiana.  How people respond to it and how far people to in looking up Twain's writings and thinking about them in an academic or serious matter is, I suppose, up to each individual reader for themselves.  I think most readers will appreciate this volume, at least.

[1] See, for example:

https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2011...

https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2016...

https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2017...
Profile Image for Jeff.
320 reviews7 followers
February 27, 2022
Six astute observations from my long-time pal, Mark Twain:

“When angry, count to four. When very angry, swear.”
“Always obey your parents, when they are around.”
“The lack of money is the root of all evil.”
“Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.”
“Always do right. This will gratify some people, and astonish the rest.”
“Grief can take care of itself; but to get the full value of joy you must have somebody to divide it with.”

(My thanks to daughter Leah for putting this book in my hands.)
Profile Image for Joshua Bishop.
16 reviews
October 15, 2025
The quotes are good but the way they are combined is dumb. The author just word searched key words and put that sentence in a chapter with other similar sentences. Read stuff by Twain not this.
Profile Image for April Helms.
1,454 reviews8 followers
May 30, 2015
Mark Twain's Guide to Diet, Exercise, Beauty, Fashion, Investment, Romance, Health and Happiness, collected and edited by Mark Dawidziak. This is a fun and fast read for Mark Twain fans. The book is a collection of Mark Twain quotes on all the topics mentioned in the title, and then some. Most highlight the famous author's acerbic wit and unflinching opinions, but occasionally, there is a sweet or wistful reflection, particularly in the chapter on Romance. I'm sure this is a reflection of Twain's own love for his wife.
Profile Image for Lieblingsbuch.
44 reviews1 follower
August 24, 2015
I did not initially expect this to be a book of quotes, and after discovery, did not expect to be necessarily thrilled with a book of quotes. However, I absolutely enjoyed reading through all of Mark Twain's quotes (taken from novels, short stories, letters, speeches, his notebook, etc.), which were placed together into groups. I would recommend this to anyone, especially any fan of Mark Twain.
Profile Image for Audrey.
1,763 reviews
June 10, 2015
I received this book as an Early Reviewer book from Library Thing. I love quotes by Mark Twain. I love them even more when I can read them in the piece of literature for which they were written. While this book can provide quick bursts of amusement, to get the full bang for your buck, I would suggest reading the fully loaded Mark Twain.
Profile Image for Aly.
171 reviews1 follower
February 8, 2016
"We despise all reverences and all the objects of reverence which are outside the pale of our own list of sacred things. And yet, with strange inconsistency, we are shocked when other people despise and defile the things which are holy to us."

Such a fun read involving more humor than the above quote suggests!
Profile Image for Michael Wylde.
43 reviews
June 16, 2015
A highly distilled edition of Twain's wisdom for the ages, the irascible and undisputed king of American wit never disappoints.
Profile Image for melydia.
1,139 reviews20 followers
April 14, 2016
A clever collection of quotes from Mark Twain, sorted into categories. Sometimes silly, sometimes thought-provoking, always entertaining. Makes me want to read more Twain.
Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews

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