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The Big M: 13 Writers Take Back the Story of Menopause
Lidia Yuknavitch teams up with 12 of today's sharpest writers to change the way we think about menopause. Exploring a variety of themes from freedom and mortality, to sexuality and the patriarchy, THE BIG M is a kaleidoscope of unique perspectives on a universal experience, each writer navigating the profound changes in their bodies and lives in their own ways. At times funny, insightful, subversive, and inspiring, THE BIG M aims to rebrand—and reinvent—our understanding of menopause.
THE BIG M includes work from a diverse group of influential writers, Roxane Gay, Cheryl Strayed, Nguyễn Phan Quế Mai, Reyna Grande, Joey Soloway, Nana-Ama Danqua, Gina Frangello, Monica Drake, Lan Samantha Chang, Julia Alvarez, Darcey Steinke, and Pam Houston. By including a wide range of voices and perspectives, Yuknavitch’s collection ensures that every reader feels less alone with an experience that—while common—has been taboo for too long.
THE BIG M includes work from a diverse group of influential writers, Roxane Gay, Cheryl Strayed, Nguyễn Phan Quế Mai, Reyna Grande, Joey Soloway, Nana-Ama Danqua, Gina Frangello, Monica Drake, Lan Samantha Chang, Julia Alvarez, Darcey Steinke, and Pam Houston. By including a wide range of voices and perspectives, Yuknavitch’s collection ensures that every reader feels less alone with an experience that—while common—has been taboo for too long.
304 pages, Paperback
Published January 27, 2026
39 people are currently reading
4351 people want to read
About the author
Lidia Yuknavitch
46 books2,541 followersLidia Yuknavitch is the author of the National Bestselling novels The Book of Joan and The Small Backs of Children, winner of the 2016 Oregon Book Award's Ken Kesey Award for Fiction as well as the Reader's Choice Award, and the novel Dora: A Headcase, Her widely acclaimed memoir The Chronology of Water was a finalist for a PEN Center USA award for creative nonfiction and winner of a PNBA Award and the Oregon Book Award Reader's Choice. Her nonfiction book based on her TED Talk, The Misfit's Manifesto, is forthcoming from TED Books.
She founded the workshop series Corporeal Writing in Portland Oregon, where she teaches both in person and online. She received her doctorate in Literature from the University of Oregon. She lives in Oregon with her husband Andy Mingo and their renaissance man son, Miles. She is a very good swimmer.
She founded the workshop series Corporeal Writing in Portland Oregon, where she teaches both in person and online. She received her doctorate in Literature from the University of Oregon. She lives in Oregon with her husband Andy Mingo and their renaissance man son, Miles. She is a very good swimmer.
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Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews
March 11, 2026
In one fell swoop, I became post-menopausal. After almost eight years of devouring every menopause title I could find (and eight years ago, I could find far fewer of them, believe me), I had a hysterectomy/oophorectomy and WHOOMP, suddenly I'm a postmenopausal human. This does not explain, however, why I suddenly became less interested in menopause. But it's not just me! Another reader-friend, who also read The Big M, reported being fairly disinterested in most of the book because she, too, was now post-menopausal. What gives, body? What gives, brain? All of which to say, the essays I enjoyed most were that in the third section, "Reimagining, Reinventing, Restorying."
I don't expect most readers to have these peculiarities, however, and the diversity of voices in this collection ensure that there will be something that resonates with nearly everyone. I loved the occasional veer into raunch with Gina Frangello; the introduction by Darcy Steinke to "she-dandies," and the human biology viewed from a naturalist's viewpoint with the Pam Houston essay. We close with the essay from editor Lidia Yuknavitch that had me screenshotting passages to send to friends and, later, buying a physical copy of the book, just so I could experience again the spells she casts: "To those of you who choose surgeries, we want you to know that the bowl of your abdomen is like a song reaching up towards the cosmos where other bowls of life are born and die and begin again endlessly. We hold bowls, we pass bowls of life around to one another, we are the bowls. There are stories of bowls and bellies all over the world."
I received an e-ARC of this title via NetGalley and the opinions expressed here are my own and freely given.
I don't expect most readers to have these peculiarities, however, and the diversity of voices in this collection ensure that there will be something that resonates with nearly everyone. I loved the occasional veer into raunch with Gina Frangello; the introduction by Darcy Steinke to "she-dandies," and the human biology viewed from a naturalist's viewpoint with the Pam Houston essay. We close with the essay from editor Lidia Yuknavitch that had me screenshotting passages to send to friends and, later, buying a physical copy of the book, just so I could experience again the spells she casts: "To those of you who choose surgeries, we want you to know that the bowl of your abdomen is like a song reaching up towards the cosmos where other bowls of life are born and die and begin again endlessly. We hold bowls, we pass bowls of life around to one another, we are the bowls. There are stories of bowls and bellies all over the world."
I received an e-ARC of this title via NetGalley and the opinions expressed here are my own and freely given.
April 20, 2026
An interesting and varied assortment of essays; some barely mention menopause while others focus on how going through it affected other aspects of the writers’ lives. Menopause does seem to be having a moment, and I think the more that’s written about it, the better.
March 4, 2026
It’s probably not an exaggeration to say that most women have little idea what to expect at menopause—that when we reach it we likely are as mystified by it as we were about menstruation when we crossed that threshold. In the age of information, it remains a topic that’s too often wrapped in silence, and when it is discussed, the conversation is rife with misinformation and dragged down by fear and despair.
In The Big M, an anthology edited by Lidia Yuknavitch, a baker’s dozen of stellar writers—most notably Cheryl Strayed, Pam Houston, Julia Alvarez and Gina Frangello—approach the topic from surprising angles, turning conventional wisdom on its head, reframing and enlarging the discourse around this mysterious and widely misunderstood life stage. In these wide-ranging essays, there’s less about hot flashes and other symptoms than you might imagine and more about discovery, insight, expansion.
Although the contributors’ accounts are wildly different, they guide, comfort, and empower; they shake off the weight of negativity that’s always surrounded the topic and make room for possibility. These essays invite women to be the storytellers about their bodies—to reclaim the narrative around this significant passage that’s been shaped by patriarchy and shaded in shame—not only to acknowledge the challenges but to celebrate the ways it can be life enriching, to see it as not the beginning of an end but a gateway to a new stage, a transformational period that has the potential to be deeply creative and satisfying—a renewal.
The Big M, as it takes menopause out of the shadows and destigmatizes it, is an important book not only for those who’ve experienced menopause or perimenopause, but for all the women yet to reach those transitions who’ll have a light upon a path that until now has been in the shadows.
In The Big M, an anthology edited by Lidia Yuknavitch, a baker’s dozen of stellar writers—most notably Cheryl Strayed, Pam Houston, Julia Alvarez and Gina Frangello—approach the topic from surprising angles, turning conventional wisdom on its head, reframing and enlarging the discourse around this mysterious and widely misunderstood life stage. In these wide-ranging essays, there’s less about hot flashes and other symptoms than you might imagine and more about discovery, insight, expansion.
Although the contributors’ accounts are wildly different, they guide, comfort, and empower; they shake off the weight of negativity that’s always surrounded the topic and make room for possibility. These essays invite women to be the storytellers about their bodies—to reclaim the narrative around this significant passage that’s been shaped by patriarchy and shaded in shame—not only to acknowledge the challenges but to celebrate the ways it can be life enriching, to see it as not the beginning of an end but a gateway to a new stage, a transformational period that has the potential to be deeply creative and satisfying—a renewal.
The Big M, as it takes menopause out of the shadows and destigmatizes it, is an important book not only for those who’ve experienced menopause or perimenopause, but for all the women yet to reach those transitions who’ll have a light upon a path that until now has been in the shadows.
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
📖 The Big M: 13 Writers Take Back the Story of Menopause
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
As someone who became post-menopausal in my early 40s, this book really resonated with me. I would especially recommend it to pre-menopausal and peri-menopausal readers. Honestly, it feels like the What to Expect guide many of us never had.
While the title centers menopause, this collection is broader than that. It traces the full arc of womanhood, from childhood and first bleed to trauma, identity, and aging. It’s honest, intense at times, and deeply validating.
That said, readers should be aware that several essays cover heavy topics such as SA, DV, r*pe, and other traumas. The content is powerful, but a heads-up would have been helpful.
Not every essay landed the same for me, and the final one left me a bit unsure, but overall this is an important, advocacy-driven collection that gives women language and permission to understand their bodies without shame.
Thank you to NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press for the digital ARC. This is my honest review of an unedited copy—all opinions are my own.
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
As someone who became post-menopausal in my early 40s, this book really resonated with me. I would especially recommend it to pre-menopausal and peri-menopausal readers. Honestly, it feels like the What to Expect guide many of us never had.
While the title centers menopause, this collection is broader than that. It traces the full arc of womanhood, from childhood and first bleed to trauma, identity, and aging. It’s honest, intense at times, and deeply validating.
That said, readers should be aware that several essays cover heavy topics such as SA, DV, r*pe, and other traumas. The content is powerful, but a heads-up would have been helpful.
Not every essay landed the same for me, and the final one left me a bit unsure, but overall this is an important, advocacy-driven collection that gives women language and permission to understand their bodies without shame.
Thank you to NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press for the digital ARC. This is my honest review of an unedited copy—all opinions are my own.
February 17, 2026
This book didn’t blow my mind as much as I hoped it would, but it gets four stars because I’m so glad it exists. We should all be talking about menopause more, and I’m grateful to these writers for putting these stories out into the world. Lidia Yuknavitch’s essay at the end is explosive in its energy and power — I wish more of the essays brought that level of passion. I was surprised to find I just didn’t personally relate very well to most of the essayists, possibly because I’m young to be in menopause? Possibly because I’m raising disabled children so my life still revolves around caregiving? I’m not totally sure, but it felt like these were women writing from and about a future phase of life that I haven’t reached, even though I’m menopausal. Overall, worth a read if you’re in or approaching this stage of life and like hearing stories of others’ experiences with it.
February 12, 2026
I won this book from the giveaways, thank you very much for sending it to me. I think five stars are not enough for the tears and laughter and so much information that will be very helpful for many, including me.
Take a breath.
Take another breath.
Now take a hot bath, or a cold plunge, or go on a long walk, or swim, or forest bathe, or go cook something, write something, paint something, collect something rocks, feathers, beads move, meditate, exercise, talk to ghosts, get a massage, watch a movie that makes you laugh your ass off, or cry your face off, hit the heavy bag, climb a rock wall or mountain, eat chocolate and drink wine do something you know gives you solace. We do know what to give ourselves, we just don't do it sometimes.
This time, you are not alone.
Take a breath.
Take another breath.
Now take a hot bath, or a cold plunge, or go on a long walk, or swim, or forest bathe, or go cook something, write something, paint something, collect something rocks, feathers, beads move, meditate, exercise, talk to ghosts, get a massage, watch a movie that makes you laugh your ass off, or cry your face off, hit the heavy bag, climb a rock wall or mountain, eat chocolate and drink wine do something you know gives you solace. We do know what to give ourselves, we just don't do it sometimes.
This time, you are not alone.
February 13, 2026
Magnificent. Moving. Monumental. Must read. Memorable. I have a feeling I’ll gift this book repeatedly over the coming years
All women should read this book, particularly those 35-60, and anyone who loves or has to spend lots of time with anyone who falls in that demographic should read it too.
All women should read this book, particularly those 35-60, and anyone who loves or has to spend lots of time with anyone who falls in that demographic should read it too.
February 16, 2026
Read THE BIG M (13 Writers Take Back the Story of Menopause) edited by Lidia Yuknavitch if you love personal essays, feeling seen, reclaimed narratives, transitions, vastly different experiences, speaking the unspeakable, the many ways through, finding meaning through storytelling & shape-shifting.
February 17, 2026
- ". . . to unsilence trauma that has been buried, brushed aside, or censored. Through unsilencing our difficult experiences, we can validate them and acknowledge that we are wortthy of being listened to, hence find solidarity, community, and healing" (p. 26).
April 22, 2026
Did not like. Too academic and not relatable to me. Very good writing, I think the essays are very well written, good stories, but only tangentially related to the book subject. Not funny or humorous. I am not sure even who would be the target audience for this book. Not recommended.
March 1, 2026
Some of the essays could have been better edited but Roxane Gay’s essay is stunning. A few other honorable mentions in here. I guess I had high hopes for this one.
March 11, 2026
One or two of the essays were somewhat interesting because of the cultures described. The rest ... nah ... not for me.
March 30, 2026
13 writers sharing their experiences of menopause. I think this is just shows how everyone experiences it differently. I appreciate the awareness and honesty of this important life milestone.
March 31, 2026
A lovely and relatable collection of essays on perimenopause and menopause.
April 15, 2026
I had higher hopes for this than what we got. I think I was hoping it was like Naomi Watts' book when it was more nostalgic essays than "pissed off actress tells us what we should all hear".
May 6, 2026
Beautiful writing. I loved the variety of amazing storytellers and variety of outlooks. Positive perspective
Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews