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The Mother
Just like the garden, the fuse box, the bills, bin night and blown light bulbs, this was just something else she'd now have to take care of herself.
Recently widowed, Miriam Duffy is a respectable North Shore real estate agent and devoted mother and grandmother. She was thrilled when her younger daughter Ally married her true love, but as time goes by Miriam wonders whether all is well with Ally, as she moves to the country and gradually withdraws, finding excuses every time Miriam offers to visit. Their relationship has always had its ups and downs, and Miriam tries to give her daughter the distance she so clearly wants. But is all as it seems?
When the truth of her daughter's situation is revealed, Miriam watches in disbelief as Ally and her children find themselves increasingly vulnerable and cut off from the world. As the situation escalates and the law proves incapable of protecting them, Miriam is faced with an unthinkable decision. But she will do anything for the people she loves most in the world. Wouldn't you?
A stunning, gripping novel that goes to the heart of a mother's love and asks what any of us might do when faced with a threat to the people we hold most dear.
Recently widowed, Miriam Duffy is a respectable North Shore real estate agent and devoted mother and grandmother. She was thrilled when her younger daughter Ally married her true love, but as time goes by Miriam wonders whether all is well with Ally, as she moves to the country and gradually withdraws, finding excuses every time Miriam offers to visit. Their relationship has always had its ups and downs, and Miriam tries to give her daughter the distance she so clearly wants. But is all as it seems?
When the truth of her daughter's situation is revealed, Miriam watches in disbelief as Ally and her children find themselves increasingly vulnerable and cut off from the world. As the situation escalates and the law proves incapable of protecting them, Miriam is faced with an unthinkable decision. But she will do anything for the people she loves most in the world. Wouldn't you?
A stunning, gripping novel that goes to the heart of a mother's love and asks what any of us might do when faced with a threat to the people we hold most dear.
384 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2022
125 people are currently reading
2555 people want to read
About the author
Jane Caro
21 books248 followersJane Caro wears many hats; including author, lecturer, mentor, social commentator, columnist, workshop facilitator, speaker, broadcaster and award-winning advertising writer. Jane runs her own communications consultancy and lectures in Advertising Creative at The School of Communication Arts at UWS. She has published three books: The Stupid Country: How Australia is dismantling public education co-authored with Chris Bonnor (2007), The F Word. How we learned to swear by feminism co-authored with Catherine Fox (2008), and Just a Girl (UQP, 2011). She has also appeared on Channel 7’s Sunrise, ABC’s Q&A and ABC’s The Gruen Transfer.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 502 reviews
August 11, 2022
The dread was relentless and real at every stage of this book. Having not read Jane Caro before, I wasn’t sure what to expect. I had only seen her on a panel many years back, streamed at my library, about women in business and entrepreneurialship. I was impressed by this fictional work, addressing a very important, and real issue, faced by women today. This theme of violence against women, whether physical, or emotional, or both, is one I have read in a handful of books lately. I will now take a break from it, as it has proved heavy. Coercive control, gaslighting, manipulation. These are all terrifying states of being. The perpetrator in this instance seemed to be quite possibly a psychopath. The desire to keep reading at every stage of the way was quite intense; I needed to know what was coming next - and of course this is a great sign of a good book.
Ally was like many teenagers difficult and emotional, but her parents were happy she finally met someone she adored and married, quite soon after meeting. Nick - on the surface - ticked all the boxes, a successful veterinarian, loving and enamoured with their daughter, Peter and Miriam felt happy to have passed on her on in a manner of speaking.
Miriam is the owner of a very successful real estate company very soon becomes a widow after the wedding and is quietly trying to manage her grief. As Ally falls pregnant twice, in a year, she is becoming frequently harder to reach on the phone. As the premise of the story is obvious to us as the synopsis clearly states the husband is not all he appears to be, the reader is left seeing the red flags and hoping that she will too. Ally’s sister is the first to disklike this man; Miriam notices small things but is not so sure.
As the plot thickens and Nick’s actions escalate, cleverly the author inserts real Australian news stories into the plot that reflect the insidious nature of the men that tragically kill their families. (In fact, as an aside, one of these families appear in a review which I have flagged to Goodreads. An American user of this site chose an image from the internet to add to her review. She chose this photo to represent a happy family. Goodreads allowed this image to stay on this review after I had explained the source of the image. I was livid. As soon as I saw this image in this particular review, I recalled the heartbreaking story. I digress).
Ally and her children seek refuge in Miriam’s home and heart, and we witness the train wreck that is the court system and the inability for the police to protect this innocent family. In the end this mother and daughter team stopped reporting the incidents to police as they were not able to receive any support. Questioning her own upbringing and the way she raised her daughters, Miriam is constantly torn and reflecting fault inwardly. Miriam has had enough, she will fight for her gorgeous grandchildren and their mother, she will prove once and for all that even as an older woman, she is a force to be reckoned with.
Recommended, and very well written, this may be a harder read for anyone triggered by family violence/emotional abuse/coercive control. A very important issue told remarkably well. Insightful.
With many thanks to Allen & Unwin for my physical copy to read and review.
Ally was like many teenagers difficult and emotional, but her parents were happy she finally met someone she adored and married, quite soon after meeting. Nick - on the surface - ticked all the boxes, a successful veterinarian, loving and enamoured with their daughter, Peter and Miriam felt happy to have passed on her on in a manner of speaking.
Miriam is the owner of a very successful real estate company very soon becomes a widow after the wedding and is quietly trying to manage her grief. As Ally falls pregnant twice, in a year, she is becoming frequently harder to reach on the phone. As the premise of the story is obvious to us as the synopsis clearly states the husband is not all he appears to be, the reader is left seeing the red flags and hoping that she will too. Ally’s sister is the first to disklike this man; Miriam notices small things but is not so sure.
As the plot thickens and Nick’s actions escalate, cleverly the author inserts real Australian news stories into the plot that reflect the insidious nature of the men that tragically kill their families. (In fact, as an aside, one of these families appear in a review which I have flagged to Goodreads. An American user of this site chose an image from the internet to add to her review. She chose this photo to represent a happy family. Goodreads allowed this image to stay on this review after I had explained the source of the image. I was livid. As soon as I saw this image in this particular review, I recalled the heartbreaking story. I digress).
Ally and her children seek refuge in Miriam’s home and heart, and we witness the train wreck that is the court system and the inability for the police to protect this innocent family. In the end this mother and daughter team stopped reporting the incidents to police as they were not able to receive any support. Questioning her own upbringing and the way she raised her daughters, Miriam is constantly torn and reflecting fault inwardly. Miriam has had enough, she will fight for her gorgeous grandchildren and their mother, she will prove once and for all that even as an older woman, she is a force to be reckoned with.
Recommended, and very well written, this may be a harder read for anyone triggered by family violence/emotional abuse/coercive control. A very important issue told remarkably well. Insightful.
With many thanks to Allen & Unwin for my physical copy to read and review.
June 7, 2022
Confronting, disturbing, sad and powerful are the first words that come to mind after reading this book.
Aussie author Jane Caro has done a suburb job in writing The Mother which is her debut novel and my goodness what a page-turner it was. I find reading books about domestic violence is always difficult to read, but they must be just as difficult to write.
This book is probably not for everyone because it is centered around domestic violence, but I can honestly say it is a book that will have you thinking long after you have turned the last page.
Aussie author Jane Caro has done a suburb job in writing The Mother which is her debut novel and my goodness what a page-turner it was. I find reading books about domestic violence is always difficult to read, but they must be just as difficult to write.
This book is probably not for everyone because it is centered around domestic violence, but I can honestly say it is a book that will have you thinking long after you have turned the last page.
May 22, 2022
The Mother is a very well written and entertaining debut novel by by Jane Caro.
Miriam is a mother of two adult daughters, Fiona and Alley. Fiona is happily married with a daughter Molly, and Ally has just met the "man of her dreams", after multiple dead end boyfriends. Miriam and her husband Pete both feel that Nick, Ally's future husband, is lovely, kind, he has a great career, ie. Veterinarian. He is always polite and chatty the few times that they have met him.
Ally and Nick had a whirlwind romance, get married, and move to Dungog NSW. Nick gets a job at the local Vet clinic and Ally ends up volunteering there as a receptionist, in her spare time between her uni studies.
Meanwhile, back in Greenwich, Sydney, Miriam owns her own successful Real Estate Business, which keeps her busy and her spare time is spent tending to her well loved garden. Miriam's life as she knows it, is shattered when her loving husband Pete suddenly dies, and Miriam is left to learn how to live again without her Pete.
Life for Ally in Dungog is accelerating rather quickly, before she knows it she is pregnant with their first child, she has quit her university studies, she is busy at home learning to be a mother in a new town with no family or friends around, and is feeling the pressure. Miriam reaches out to Ally, to try to come and spend time with her new grandchild and youngest daughter, but Ally keeps refusing and has multiple reasons as to why she can do it on her.
This story uncovers the truths behind domestic violence situations, and how easy it is to go undiscovered by the closest of family members and friends.
Without giving away too much of the story line, so that you are able to experience the book for itself. What Ally and Miriam both go through in this situation is terribly scary and unfortunately believable.
Ally is bullied, and becomes a slight shadow of the confident woman that she once was before she was married. She looses faith in herself, and has convinced by her husband to the point of believing that she is insane and going crazy. Ally's mother Miriam is a bad ass Mum, a Mum that will go to the end of the earth to protect her daughter.
As a mum of a young adult daughter myself, I found this book extremely relatable, and difficult to put down.
Thankyou to Allen and Unwin for my advanced copy, in return I am offering my honest review. Book first published in March 2022.
4 Stars: I enjoyed it and would recommend it to people who like the genre. I will definitely want to read more books by this author.
Please visit my blog and Facebook page to see all of my past and future book reviews.
https://www.facebook.com/Kylies-Book-...
https://kyliesbookaddictreviews.blogs... (less) [edit]
Miriam is a mother of two adult daughters, Fiona and Alley. Fiona is happily married with a daughter Molly, and Ally has just met the "man of her dreams", after multiple dead end boyfriends. Miriam and her husband Pete both feel that Nick, Ally's future husband, is lovely, kind, he has a great career, ie. Veterinarian. He is always polite and chatty the few times that they have met him.
Ally and Nick had a whirlwind romance, get married, and move to Dungog NSW. Nick gets a job at the local Vet clinic and Ally ends up volunteering there as a receptionist, in her spare time between her uni studies.
Meanwhile, back in Greenwich, Sydney, Miriam owns her own successful Real Estate Business, which keeps her busy and her spare time is spent tending to her well loved garden. Miriam's life as she knows it, is shattered when her loving husband Pete suddenly dies, and Miriam is left to learn how to live again without her Pete.
Life for Ally in Dungog is accelerating rather quickly, before she knows it she is pregnant with their first child, she has quit her university studies, she is busy at home learning to be a mother in a new town with no family or friends around, and is feeling the pressure. Miriam reaches out to Ally, to try to come and spend time with her new grandchild and youngest daughter, but Ally keeps refusing and has multiple reasons as to why she can do it on her.
This story uncovers the truths behind domestic violence situations, and how easy it is to go undiscovered by the closest of family members and friends.
Without giving away too much of the story line, so that you are able to experience the book for itself. What Ally and Miriam both go through in this situation is terribly scary and unfortunately believable.
Ally is bullied, and becomes a slight shadow of the confident woman that she once was before she was married. She looses faith in herself, and has convinced by her husband to the point of believing that she is insane and going crazy. Ally's mother Miriam is a bad ass Mum, a Mum that will go to the end of the earth to protect her daughter.
As a mum of a young adult daughter myself, I found this book extremely relatable, and difficult to put down.
Thankyou to Allen and Unwin for my advanced copy, in return I am offering my honest review. Book first published in March 2022.
4 Stars: I enjoyed it and would recommend it to people who like the genre. I will definitely want to read more books by this author.
Please visit my blog and Facebook page to see all of my past and future book reviews.
https://www.facebook.com/Kylies-Book-...
https://kyliesbookaddictreviews.blogs... (less) [edit]
March 25, 2022
This is an awesome debut, it was compelling reading for me as a mother and grandmother myself I wonder what lengths I would go to keep my family safe. This book is confronting at times and so very emotional as the author delves into domestic violence.
Miriam Duffy runs a successful real estate on Sydney’s North Shore she is happily married to Pete and they have two grown up daughters and one granddaughter, her youngest daughter Ally has just married the love of her life, Vet Nick Carruthers and Miriam and Pete think the world of him. Miriam is soon rocked by the death of Pete her true rock, Miriam’s life is turned upside down but at least her two daughters are happy in their marriages and Miriam is learning to cope alone, or are both Fiona and Ally happy?
Nick and Ally move to the country and she is soon pregnant and when Ally is not responding to phone calls and keeping in touch, although they have had an up and down relationship as mother and daughter Ally is worried, when she visits and they spend a weekend together she settles a bit but there is something that Miriam feels is not quite right even though Nick is such an easy going guy.
Things escalate when Ally falls pregnant again soon after the birth of her son Teddy, and when Isla is born it is not long before Ally and the children arrive at Miriam’s home having left Nick and now Miriam sees what has been happening, how far will she go to protect the people she loves most?
This is heart-breaking at times it had me yelling with frustration and crying to see how things work with the family courts and the law, every emotion came out while reading this one, Jane Caro has taken on issues that are so relevant in this day and age and done it with feeling and honesty, she has dug deep into the emotions of these characters from start to finish, I loved this story so much yes it is emotional and probably not for everyone, but it showed courage and strength in these woman and I cheered them one. This is one that I do recommend.
My thanks to Allen & Unwin for my copy to read and review.
Miriam Duffy runs a successful real estate on Sydney’s North Shore she is happily married to Pete and they have two grown up daughters and one granddaughter, her youngest daughter Ally has just married the love of her life, Vet Nick Carruthers and Miriam and Pete think the world of him. Miriam is soon rocked by the death of Pete her true rock, Miriam’s life is turned upside down but at least her two daughters are happy in their marriages and Miriam is learning to cope alone, or are both Fiona and Ally happy?
Nick and Ally move to the country and she is soon pregnant and when Ally is not responding to phone calls and keeping in touch, although they have had an up and down relationship as mother and daughter Ally is worried, when she visits and they spend a weekend together she settles a bit but there is something that Miriam feels is not quite right even though Nick is such an easy going guy.
Things escalate when Ally falls pregnant again soon after the birth of her son Teddy, and when Isla is born it is not long before Ally and the children arrive at Miriam’s home having left Nick and now Miriam sees what has been happening, how far will she go to protect the people she loves most?
This is heart-breaking at times it had me yelling with frustration and crying to see how things work with the family courts and the law, every emotion came out while reading this one, Jane Caro has taken on issues that are so relevant in this day and age and done it with feeling and honesty, she has dug deep into the emotions of these characters from start to finish, I loved this story so much yes it is emotional and probably not for everyone, but it showed courage and strength in these woman and I cheered them one. This is one that I do recommend.
My thanks to Allen & Unwin for my copy to read and review.
February 20, 2022
The Mother is the debut adult fiction novel from Jane Caro, a women with many talents. This book evoked so many emotions in my whilst reading it. It mad me angry, it made me sad and it really made me think. It is confronting look at domestic violence and the ways that the law and can and cannot protect people.
This is the story of Miriam, a recently widowed mother of 2 daughters. She lost her husband suddenly and both her daughters are now married an living their own lives. Daughter Ally has just married and moved away to the country with her new husband where he is to be the local vet. She is soon pregnant and feeling very alone. Miriam worries that she is losing her daughter, with less and less contact with her, but puts it down to being newly weds. She soon realises that there is alot more to it than that and she vows to do anything and everything to protect her daughter.
It is a look at how looks can be deceiving and how things are not always as they seem. As the behavior escalates, Miriam finds herself doing and thinking things that she never dreamed she would. What would you do to protect those that you love and how far would you go?
This is a really powerful story and on that will stay with me for a long time.
Thank you to Allen and Unwin for my advanced copy to read. Published in Australia March 1st
This is the story of Miriam, a recently widowed mother of 2 daughters. She lost her husband suddenly and both her daughters are now married an living their own lives. Daughter Ally has just married and moved away to the country with her new husband where he is to be the local vet. She is soon pregnant and feeling very alone. Miriam worries that she is losing her daughter, with less and less contact with her, but puts it down to being newly weds. She soon realises that there is alot more to it than that and she vows to do anything and everything to protect her daughter.
It is a look at how looks can be deceiving and how things are not always as they seem. As the behavior escalates, Miriam finds herself doing and thinking things that she never dreamed she would. What would you do to protect those that you love and how far would you go?
This is a really powerful story and on that will stay with me for a long time.
Thank you to Allen and Unwin for my advanced copy to read. Published in Australia March 1st
March 12, 2022
I'm definitely in the minority here by saying that I didn't enjoy this one, which has left me so disappointed because it is such an important story that needs to be told. My dislike comes down completely to Miriam. I found her inner monologue so annoying, and she came across to me as very immature. And the more of the story that I read, the more that I disliked her. Even to the point that I ended up skimming the last one hundred or so pages. I just couldn't spend another minute with her.
2 stars for the importance of the story.
2 stars for the importance of the story.
September 2, 2022
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The Mother by Jane Caro. (2022).
Recently widowed, Miriam is a respectable North Shore real estate agent and devoted mother and grandmother. It is thrilling when her youngest daughter Ally marries Nick, but as time goes by Miriam wonders if all is well as Ally gradually withdraws. When the truth of her daughter's situation is revealed, Miriam watches in disbelief as Ally and her children find themselves increasingly vulnerable and cut off. As the situation escalates and the law proves incapable of protecting them, Miriam is faced with an unthinkable decision. But she will do anything for the people she loves...
I have no doubt this novel will be one of those that generates a lot of discussion and becomes a popular book club pick. Dealing with the very heavy topic of domestic violence, the author has portrayed the subject realistically, which makes it all the more confronting to read. Miriam observes her daughter withdrawing but doesn't necessarily notice the red flags and is totally shocked to find her daughter has been the victim of abuse; that's just the start of it as she realises that the law is limited in what it can do to protect her daughter Ally and Ally's children. It's sadly something that is reflected in the news all too often, and I think the author has hit the nail on the head with the depictions of frustration and helplessness that Miriam feels. Miriam's actions are extreme but certainly food for thought in understanding why she felt she had to act in this way - I think most readers will certainly sympathise with Miriam in some way.
Overall: I would recommend this well-written and gripping book, however I issue a caution that it could be triggering for those who struggle with the topic of domestic violence.
*www.facebook.com/onewomansbbr
The Mother by Jane Caro. (2022).
Recently widowed, Miriam is a respectable North Shore real estate agent and devoted mother and grandmother. It is thrilling when her youngest daughter Ally marries Nick, but as time goes by Miriam wonders if all is well as Ally gradually withdraws. When the truth of her daughter's situation is revealed, Miriam watches in disbelief as Ally and her children find themselves increasingly vulnerable and cut off. As the situation escalates and the law proves incapable of protecting them, Miriam is faced with an unthinkable decision. But she will do anything for the people she loves...
I have no doubt this novel will be one of those that generates a lot of discussion and becomes a popular book club pick. Dealing with the very heavy topic of domestic violence, the author has portrayed the subject realistically, which makes it all the more confronting to read. Miriam observes her daughter withdrawing but doesn't necessarily notice the red flags and is totally shocked to find her daughter has been the victim of abuse; that's just the start of it as she realises that the law is limited in what it can do to protect her daughter Ally and Ally's children. It's sadly something that is reflected in the news all too often, and I think the author has hit the nail on the head with the depictions of frustration and helplessness that Miriam feels. Miriam's actions are extreme but certainly food for thought in understanding why she felt she had to act in this way - I think most readers will certainly sympathise with Miriam in some way.
Overall: I would recommend this well-written and gripping book, however I issue a caution that it could be triggering for those who struggle with the topic of domestic violence.
February 22, 2023
This was not an easy book to read or is it to review. The topic is essential and important, but never easy to read, even as fiction. Apparently this is Ms Caro's first venture into fiction, after a career in newswriting and non-fiction writing. The book is a bit rough at first and her inexperience in writing fiction to bring the reader into the process is not even or consistent. But by the end, Ms Caro brings her story to a convincing and powerful conclusion.
I nearly abandoned the book a few times as I found it too painful to read, having spent several years on a board of a DV service in Sydney. The story is not unique unfortunately, but it is painful, especially in the time that some of the characters in the book seem to be clueless as to just how horrible and dangerous the perpetrator, Nick, really is. The fact that it ends up being the mother of the victim coming to the fore, rather than the wife and mother of the children at risk, makes this a bit different and in the end more powerful.
Last year I did not finish The Family Doctor by Debra Oswald for similar themes, a horrible abusive male, but I'm glad I stuck with this one.
I also liked that this book took place in Sydney and Dungog, where I have spent a lot of time while bushwalking into the Barrington Tops, just North of Sydney. Not for everyone, not sure if I recommend it to anyone, but I'm glad I persevered. A library ebook.
I nearly abandoned the book a few times as I found it too painful to read, having spent several years on a board of a DV service in Sydney. The story is not unique unfortunately, but it is painful, especially in the time that some of the characters in the book seem to be clueless as to just how horrible and dangerous the perpetrator, Nick, really is. The fact that it ends up being the mother of the victim coming to the fore, rather than the wife and mother of the children at risk, makes this a bit different and in the end more powerful.
Last year I did not finish The Family Doctor by Debra Oswald for similar themes, a horrible abusive male, but I'm glad I stuck with this one.
I also liked that this book took place in Sydney and Dungog, where I have spent a lot of time while bushwalking into the Barrington Tops, just North of Sydney. Not for everyone, not sure if I recommend it to anyone, but I'm glad I persevered. A library ebook.
March 7, 2022
The Mother is the first novel for adults by award winning Australian columnist and author, novelist, broadcaster, and documentary writer, Jane Caro. What would make a well-respected widow in her sixties travel to a distant town to buy a gun? That’s what Miriam Duffy is doing. For the why, we need to travel back a few years…
When Pete Franklin was still alive, he and Miriam were happy to see their jumpy, brittle younger daughter, Allison marry the love of her life, veterinarian Nick Carruthers, after a whirlwind romance. They both liked the charming man who had swept their daughter off her feet. Taking her away to Dungog, where he would join a practice, meant they would see her less, but surely they would visit?
Too soon after, Pete died. Miriam and her daughters were consumed by grief, but Ally’s pregnancy jolted Miriam: she needed to emerge from the fog to support her daughter. But their relationship had never been the easy in-tune bond that Ally had with Pete, and Miriam found it difficult to judge the balance between giving Ally space, privacy, independence and showing interest, care, love. Pete had always been the voice of reason when her doubts assailed her, but now he wasn’t there…
While she kept busy with her real estate business, Miriam didn’t see her daughter and grandson nearly enough. She felt fobbed off, Ally often dissembling when it came to arrangements, or was Miriam just being sensitive? And some of what Nick told her didn’t agree with Ally’s version of how things were. But Nick invariably presented as caring, rational and reasonable.
When Ally and her young children arrived on her doorstep, Miriam was shocked, almost incredulous, at what her daughter related. Emotional abuse and coercive control had been endured, but Nick’s violence brought intolerable fears for her children. Neither Ally nor Miriam quite envisaged the campaign of harassment this man would wage to gain custody of those children. And the police, the law, seemed powerless to protect them. “She could hear fate approaching sometimes, like a runaway train heading towards them as they stood frozen on the tracks” Miriam had to act…
All aspects of this novel, including the characters and their behaviour, the plot and the setting, are thoroughly believable. Caro’s depiction of an abusive relationship, the hidden and often insidious effect of a controlling partner, and exactly what that entails, feels truly authentic. She demonstrates how clues to controlling behaviour often only apparent in hindsight to those at a remove; how women who call out this behaviour are often painted as hysterical or delusional; and how frustrating the impotence of the law must be. Topical, relevant and thought-provoking.
This unbiased review is from an uncorrected proof copy provided by Allen &Unwin.
When Pete Franklin was still alive, he and Miriam were happy to see their jumpy, brittle younger daughter, Allison marry the love of her life, veterinarian Nick Carruthers, after a whirlwind romance. They both liked the charming man who had swept their daughter off her feet. Taking her away to Dungog, where he would join a practice, meant they would see her less, but surely they would visit?
Too soon after, Pete died. Miriam and her daughters were consumed by grief, but Ally’s pregnancy jolted Miriam: she needed to emerge from the fog to support her daughter. But their relationship had never been the easy in-tune bond that Ally had with Pete, and Miriam found it difficult to judge the balance between giving Ally space, privacy, independence and showing interest, care, love. Pete had always been the voice of reason when her doubts assailed her, but now he wasn’t there…
While she kept busy with her real estate business, Miriam didn’t see her daughter and grandson nearly enough. She felt fobbed off, Ally often dissembling when it came to arrangements, or was Miriam just being sensitive? And some of what Nick told her didn’t agree with Ally’s version of how things were. But Nick invariably presented as caring, rational and reasonable.
When Ally and her young children arrived on her doorstep, Miriam was shocked, almost incredulous, at what her daughter related. Emotional abuse and coercive control had been endured, but Nick’s violence brought intolerable fears for her children. Neither Ally nor Miriam quite envisaged the campaign of harassment this man would wage to gain custody of those children. And the police, the law, seemed powerless to protect them. “She could hear fate approaching sometimes, like a runaway train heading towards them as they stood frozen on the tracks” Miriam had to act…
All aspects of this novel, including the characters and their behaviour, the plot and the setting, are thoroughly believable. Caro’s depiction of an abusive relationship, the hidden and often insidious effect of a controlling partner, and exactly what that entails, feels truly authentic. She demonstrates how clues to controlling behaviour often only apparent in hindsight to those at a remove; how women who call out this behaviour are often painted as hysterical or delusional; and how frustrating the impotence of the law must be. Topical, relevant and thought-provoking.
This unbiased review is from an uncorrected proof copy provided by Allen &Unwin.
March 11, 2022
Thank you to Allen and Unwin for sending me a copy of this book.
4.5 Stars
This is an exceptional , realistic written book about domestic violence.
It was written with sensitivity. I felt like I was a part of the family. There are 2 families in this book. Nick - his family consist of himself, Dad Maurice, and Mum Sally. Who both think Nick can do no wrong. Ally - whose family consist of Dad Peter, Mum Miriam, and sister Fiona. I connected with Miriam the most being a mother myself.
The book moves at a meduim pace and really gets intense half way through , when all the emotional and physical abuse starts.
It is set in Australia both in the city where both sets of parents live and country Dungog where Ally and Nick move to.
It touches on topics such as mental health, AVO's are they really worth the paper they are written on?
I highly recommend this book even though it discusses such a sensitive subject it contains a story you wont be able to put down.
4.5 Stars
This is an exceptional , realistic written book about domestic violence.
It was written with sensitivity. I felt like I was a part of the family. There are 2 families in this book. Nick - his family consist of himself, Dad Maurice, and Mum Sally. Who both think Nick can do no wrong. Ally - whose family consist of Dad Peter, Mum Miriam, and sister Fiona. I connected with Miriam the most being a mother myself.
The book moves at a meduim pace and really gets intense half way through , when all the emotional and physical abuse starts.
It is set in Australia both in the city where both sets of parents live and country Dungog where Ally and Nick move to.
It touches on topics such as mental health, AVO's are they really worth the paper they are written on?
I highly recommend this book even though it discusses such a sensitive subject it contains a story you wont be able to put down.
dnf-abandoned
March 15, 2022Maybe good for book clubs
I had heard about this book in a few places, and then I heard the author, Jane Caro, interviewed at some length about it. I've enjoyed her frequent media appearances as a commentator, particularly on feminism and education, but I've not read any of her other books.
In the interview about this, she mentioned the sorts of things that had convinced her it was a subject that needed to be addressed.
It seemed to me that between the blurb, the interview, and the excerpts that were read that I'd pretty much heard the plot. I decided to have a quick look at the e-book online to see what I thought of the writing and whether or not it would be an interesting read.
I read the first few chapters, skimmed a bit more, and felt I'd heard it all already. But, I admit, I DID want to know what the final result was, so I skimmed a bit later in the book to find out exactly what happened. I was disappointed to see a new character introduced at the end unnecessarily.
I'm sure a lot of readers will enjoy this, and although I know her writing is not for me, I don't want to lower the ratings based on my cursory skim and earlier knowledge of the story.
It would make a great book club read, so I'd certainly recommend it for that.
I had heard about this book in a few places, and then I heard the author, Jane Caro, interviewed at some length about it. I've enjoyed her frequent media appearances as a commentator, particularly on feminism and education, but I've not read any of her other books.
In the interview about this, she mentioned the sorts of things that had convinced her it was a subject that needed to be addressed.
It seemed to me that between the blurb, the interview, and the excerpts that were read that I'd pretty much heard the plot. I decided to have a quick look at the e-book online to see what I thought of the writing and whether or not it would be an interesting read.
I read the first few chapters, skimmed a bit more, and felt I'd heard it all already. But, I admit, I DID want to know what the final result was, so I skimmed a bit later in the book to find out exactly what happened. I was disappointed to see a new character introduced at the end unnecessarily.
I'm sure a lot of readers will enjoy this, and although I know her writing is not for me, I don't want to lower the ratings based on my cursory skim and earlier knowledge of the story.
It would make a great book club read, so I'd certainly recommend it for that.
May 22, 2022
*https://mrsbbookreviews.wordpress.com
4.5 stars
‘Miriam was a mother who had lived in terror of losing her daughter.’
According to award winning journalist and author Tracey Spicer, every Australian should read Jane Caro’s The Mother. I have to agree with Tracey Spicer’s generous and very true front cover quote. Harrowing, powerful and hard hitting, The Mother is a book that I absorbed over a two-day period.
Penned by award winning journalist Jane Caro, The Mother is a vital and principled story that looks at the life of a family placed under great duress. We meet Miriam, a real estate agent who finds life hard to negotiate when her daughter marries and her husband dies unexpectedly. Soon after Miriam’s daughter Ally marries a vet, she moves away to a country location and Miriam finds she is unable to connect freely with her youngest child. Despite various offers extended to visit Ally, these requests fall on deaf ears. Miriam starts to suspect that something is amiss but she is also conscious of her daughter’s wishes. When things come to a head, the truth behind Ally’s marriage and relationship is exposed, leaving Miriam in a state of shock. As Miriam works hard to protect her daughter and her grandchildren from harm, it seems that the law is powerless to protect them. How far will Miriam go to save her loved ones from any further pain?
As with all books I read, I always appreciate the acknowledgements section, so I will start this review by sending my thanks to the author for her heartfelt closing note. Taking the time to read the acknowledgements area of The Mother gave me a sense of respect and understanding for the immense effort it took to pen this novel. Jane Caro explains that this was a tough book to write. I quickly understood that this would have been the case when I began to read The Mother. Jane Caro explains that The Mother took her to some places she didn’t want to go, or think about. I can only imagine how hard this would have been as a writer but I am grateful to Jane Caro for shining the light on domestic violence, control and coercion. It is such a vital area of society that we must do all we can to educate the world about how we can work together to keep our women and children safe.
The Mother is a book that I seemed to absorb every word, sentence and a paragraph. It took me much longer than normal to get through a book of this size, but I think that this demonstrates my commitment to the intent of the novel. The Mother is a book with a strong message that I hope is better communicated to the world at large via this story. There is no debating the importance of The Mother and I’m sure the narrative reflects the experiences of many out there. Structurally, Jane Caro’s book is divided into two parts over twenty-six chapters, with a prologue and an epilogue. This is a clear page turner and a consuming read that I was unable to tear myself away from during the two-day period I spent in the company of The Mother.
Well drawn characters help to build this compelling story. Miriam is a realistic, likeable and fascinating lead. Caro has also devised an authentic protagonist in Ally, Miriam’s daughter. The husband figure of this tale was painted extremely well by Caro, I definitely feared this monster. The support cast also help to bolster this novel’s narrative further. The characters presented in The Mother are robust, authentic and credible – even if I was at odds with a few of them.
With some pertinent themes around abuse, domestic violence, control, coercion, support, family, society, upbringing, motherhood, relationships, loss, birth, mental health, work, the law, incarceration, friendship, blame and restitution, The Mother is an extremely powerful read that I recommend without question.
*Thanks extended to Allen & Unwin for providing a free copy of this book for review purposes.
4.5 stars
‘Miriam was a mother who had lived in terror of losing her daughter.’
According to award winning journalist and author Tracey Spicer, every Australian should read Jane Caro’s The Mother. I have to agree with Tracey Spicer’s generous and very true front cover quote. Harrowing, powerful and hard hitting, The Mother is a book that I absorbed over a two-day period.
Penned by award winning journalist Jane Caro, The Mother is a vital and principled story that looks at the life of a family placed under great duress. We meet Miriam, a real estate agent who finds life hard to negotiate when her daughter marries and her husband dies unexpectedly. Soon after Miriam’s daughter Ally marries a vet, she moves away to a country location and Miriam finds she is unable to connect freely with her youngest child. Despite various offers extended to visit Ally, these requests fall on deaf ears. Miriam starts to suspect that something is amiss but she is also conscious of her daughter’s wishes. When things come to a head, the truth behind Ally’s marriage and relationship is exposed, leaving Miriam in a state of shock. As Miriam works hard to protect her daughter and her grandchildren from harm, it seems that the law is powerless to protect them. How far will Miriam go to save her loved ones from any further pain?
As with all books I read, I always appreciate the acknowledgements section, so I will start this review by sending my thanks to the author for her heartfelt closing note. Taking the time to read the acknowledgements area of The Mother gave me a sense of respect and understanding for the immense effort it took to pen this novel. Jane Caro explains that this was a tough book to write. I quickly understood that this would have been the case when I began to read The Mother. Jane Caro explains that The Mother took her to some places she didn’t want to go, or think about. I can only imagine how hard this would have been as a writer but I am grateful to Jane Caro for shining the light on domestic violence, control and coercion. It is such a vital area of society that we must do all we can to educate the world about how we can work together to keep our women and children safe.
The Mother is a book that I seemed to absorb every word, sentence and a paragraph. It took me much longer than normal to get through a book of this size, but I think that this demonstrates my commitment to the intent of the novel. The Mother is a book with a strong message that I hope is better communicated to the world at large via this story. There is no debating the importance of The Mother and I’m sure the narrative reflects the experiences of many out there. Structurally, Jane Caro’s book is divided into two parts over twenty-six chapters, with a prologue and an epilogue. This is a clear page turner and a consuming read that I was unable to tear myself away from during the two-day period I spent in the company of The Mother.
Well drawn characters help to build this compelling story. Miriam is a realistic, likeable and fascinating lead. Caro has also devised an authentic protagonist in Ally, Miriam’s daughter. The husband figure of this tale was painted extremely well by Caro, I definitely feared this monster. The support cast also help to bolster this novel’s narrative further. The characters presented in The Mother are robust, authentic and credible – even if I was at odds with a few of them.
With some pertinent themes around abuse, domestic violence, control, coercion, support, family, society, upbringing, motherhood, relationships, loss, birth, mental health, work, the law, incarceration, friendship, blame and restitution, The Mother is an extremely powerful read that I recommend without question.
*Thanks extended to Allen & Unwin for providing a free copy of this book for review purposes.
April 2, 2022
The Mother is the first novel for adults by award winning Australian columnist and author, novelist, broadcaster, and documentary writer, Jane Caro. The audio version is narrated by Jessica Douglas-Henry. What would make a well-respected widow in her sixties travel to a distant town to buy a gun? That’s what Miriam Duffy is doing. For the why, we need to travel back a few years…
When Pete Franklin was still alive, he and Miriam were happy to see their jumpy, brittle younger daughter, Allison marry the love of her life, veterinarian Nick Carruthers, after a whirlwind romance. They both liked the charming man who had swept their daughter off her feet. Taking her away to Dungog, where he would join a practice, meant they would see her less, but surely they would visit?
Too soon after, Pete died. Miriam and her daughters were consumed by grief, but Ally’s pregnancy jolted Miriam: she needed to emerge from the fog to support her daughter. But their relationship had never been the easy in-tune bond that Ally had with Pete, and Miriam found it difficult to judge the balance between giving Ally space, privacy, independence and showing interest, care, love. Pete had always been the voice of reason when her doubts assailed her, but now he wasn’t there…
While she kept busy with her real estate business, Miriam didn’t see her daughter and grandson nearly enough. She felt fobbed off, Ally often dissembling when it came to arrangements, or was Miriam just being sensitive? And some of what Nick told her didn’t agree with Ally’s version of how things were. But Nick invariably presented as caring, rational and reasonable.
When Ally and her young children arrived on her doorstep, Miriam was shocked, almost incredulous, at what her daughter related. Emotional abuse and coercive control had been endured, but Nick’s violence brought intolerable fears for her children. Neither Ally nor Miriam quite envisaged the campaign of harassment this man would wage to gain custody of those children. And the police, the law, seemed powerless to protect them. “She could hear fate approaching sometimes, like a runaway train heading towards them as they stood frozen on the tracks” Miriam had to act…
All aspects of this novel, including the characters and their behaviour, the plot and the setting, are thoroughly believable. Caro’s depiction of an abusive relationship, the hidden and often insidious effect of a controlling partner, and exactly what that entails, feels truly authentic. She demonstrates how clues to controlling behaviour often only apparent in hindsight to those at a remove; how women who call out this behaviour are often painted as hysterical or delusional; and how frustrating the impotence of the law must be. Topical, relevant and thought-provoking.
When Pete Franklin was still alive, he and Miriam were happy to see their jumpy, brittle younger daughter, Allison marry the love of her life, veterinarian Nick Carruthers, after a whirlwind romance. They both liked the charming man who had swept their daughter off her feet. Taking her away to Dungog, where he would join a practice, meant they would see her less, but surely they would visit?
Too soon after, Pete died. Miriam and her daughters were consumed by grief, but Ally’s pregnancy jolted Miriam: she needed to emerge from the fog to support her daughter. But their relationship had never been the easy in-tune bond that Ally had with Pete, and Miriam found it difficult to judge the balance between giving Ally space, privacy, independence and showing interest, care, love. Pete had always been the voice of reason when her doubts assailed her, but now he wasn’t there…
While she kept busy with her real estate business, Miriam didn’t see her daughter and grandson nearly enough. She felt fobbed off, Ally often dissembling when it came to arrangements, or was Miriam just being sensitive? And some of what Nick told her didn’t agree with Ally’s version of how things were. But Nick invariably presented as caring, rational and reasonable.
When Ally and her young children arrived on her doorstep, Miriam was shocked, almost incredulous, at what her daughter related. Emotional abuse and coercive control had been endured, but Nick’s violence brought intolerable fears for her children. Neither Ally nor Miriam quite envisaged the campaign of harassment this man would wage to gain custody of those children. And the police, the law, seemed powerless to protect them. “She could hear fate approaching sometimes, like a runaway train heading towards them as they stood frozen on the tracks” Miriam had to act…
All aspects of this novel, including the characters and their behaviour, the plot and the setting, are thoroughly believable. Caro’s depiction of an abusive relationship, the hidden and often insidious effect of a controlling partner, and exactly what that entails, feels truly authentic. She demonstrates how clues to controlling behaviour often only apparent in hindsight to those at a remove; how women who call out this behaviour are often painted as hysterical or delusional; and how frustrating the impotence of the law must be. Topical, relevant and thought-provoking.
March 16, 2022
⭐️4 Stars⭐️
Oh wow, this story is so relevant and all too true for people living with emotional abuse, threats and controlling behaviour from a partner. I couldn’t put it down.
The Mother by Jane Caro begins with Miriam Duffy a business woman who runs a successful real estate agency attending the wedding of her youngest daughter Ally. We’ll see Miriam go through a traumatic event in her life and she’s also faced with a decision that will affect all their lives dramatically.
As time goes by Ally moves out of town with her husband Nick and seems to become more distant, finding excuses when Miriam wants to visit and dismissing her. Miriam suspects something is terribly wrong with her daughter and she’ll do anything to protect the people she loves!
This story will make you angry and at the same time tear at your heart. It highlights the lack of action that can be taken against violent partners and how they push the boundaries of the law and create a world of living in fear for their victims.
The Mother is well written and a must read Aussie domestic thriller that is so realistic it will shock.
Publication date 01 March 22
Publisher Allen & Unwin Australia
Thank you so much Allen & Unwin Australia for a copy of the book.
Oh wow, this story is so relevant and all too true for people living with emotional abuse, threats and controlling behaviour from a partner. I couldn’t put it down.
The Mother by Jane Caro begins with Miriam Duffy a business woman who runs a successful real estate agency attending the wedding of her youngest daughter Ally. We’ll see Miriam go through a traumatic event in her life and she’s also faced with a decision that will affect all their lives dramatically.
As time goes by Ally moves out of town with her husband Nick and seems to become more distant, finding excuses when Miriam wants to visit and dismissing her. Miriam suspects something is terribly wrong with her daughter and she’ll do anything to protect the people she loves!
This story will make you angry and at the same time tear at your heart. It highlights the lack of action that can be taken against violent partners and how they push the boundaries of the law and create a world of living in fear for their victims.
The Mother is well written and a must read Aussie domestic thriller that is so realistic it will shock.
Publication date 01 March 22
Publisher Allen & Unwin Australia
Thank you so much Allen & Unwin Australia for a copy of the book.
November 22, 2025
Deeply moving and frighteningly plausible tale of coercive control, family violence and the desperation of a mother trying to protect her family.
Will definitely re-read this one.
Jane Caro is a skilled writer and social commentator, and this story is no exception.
Will definitely re-read this one.
Jane Caro is a skilled writer and social commentator, and this story is no exception.
June 6, 2022
A timely novel addressing an important issue with a reasonable plot line let down by inauthentic and poorly drawn characters. Its ok to have unlikeable characters and every character in this novel was unlikeable, but I just didn’t believe them. There was no tension nor psychological thrill. It was threadbare.
May 15, 2022
Unfortunately it's one of those books which doesn't live up to the hype. I struggled to like any of the characters. They were unbelievable, irrational, and self centered. The mother is the centre hold of the book and she is pushed to the ultimate act to protect the family. But it's really hard to relate to somebody who is whinging over the fact she hates her husband unexpectedly dying, her neighbour having a dog, her daughter taking her husband's name, not calling her during the first weeks of honeymoon, the unborn baby's sex not to be revealed to her etc. Family violence unfortunately still happens and none of us should turn the blind eye on it. Still, there are better books written about the subject and it's hardly believable that in this day and age in Australia authorities have failed in every single angle to help women and children who experience any sort of abuse.
February 2, 2022
Four and a half stars.
An enthralling read as the reader sees how things changed with Ally and her husband Nick. Miriam is grieving the death of her husband Pete. Her daughters Fiona and Ally are morning their father. Then Ally meets Nick and a whirlwind romance ensues. Miriam is glad her daughter was happily married. But over time Miriam hears less and less from Ally and she is at times stopped from visiting their home in the Australian town of Dungog where Nick is a vet. Although only a few hours away from Sydney, Miriam hardly gets to see her grandson. Then Ally is pregnant again.Suspicions form in Miriam’s mind that all is far from well in the marriage and that Nick is abusive. Since it seems the law is powerless to help, Miriam makes plans to intervene if necessary. But will she be able to do what is needed to stop the abuse? And what will be the consequences if she does?
The tension builds through as the reader waits to see what will happen. While not agreeing with Miriam’s plans it is easy to empathise with her. This is confronting look at domestic violence, although I have to say I could have done without the use of the f and c word in this novel. Despite that, a great read that had me turning pages. Thanks to Allen & Unwin and Better Reading for the chance to read and review this ARC.
An enthralling read as the reader sees how things changed with Ally and her husband Nick. Miriam is grieving the death of her husband Pete. Her daughters Fiona and Ally are morning their father. Then Ally meets Nick and a whirlwind romance ensues. Miriam is glad her daughter was happily married. But over time Miriam hears less and less from Ally and she is at times stopped from visiting their home in the Australian town of Dungog where Nick is a vet. Although only a few hours away from Sydney, Miriam hardly gets to see her grandson. Then Ally is pregnant again.Suspicions form in Miriam’s mind that all is far from well in the marriage and that Nick is abusive. Since it seems the law is powerless to help, Miriam makes plans to intervene if necessary. But will she be able to do what is needed to stop the abuse? And what will be the consequences if she does?
The tension builds through as the reader waits to see what will happen. While not agreeing with Miriam’s plans it is easy to empathise with her. This is confronting look at domestic violence, although I have to say I could have done without the use of the f and c word in this novel. Despite that, a great read that had me turning pages. Thanks to Allen & Unwin and Better Reading for the chance to read and review this ARC.
March 4, 2022
I didn’t love it. Filled with too much unnecessary detail, backstory, fluff. Everything was about Miriam… until it wasn’t. I can’t help thinking a different POV, maybe Fiona’s, would move the story along better. Miriam’s too caught in her own grief to notice what’s going around her; not that Ally let much slip which is, of course, the whole point.
From a writing point of view, this novel does everything emerging writers are told not to do: info dumps (especially at the start), too many em dashes, no hook, background info etc. I found it tedious.
From a writing point of view, this novel does everything emerging writers are told not to do: info dumps (especially at the start), too many em dashes, no hook, background info etc. I found it tedious.
April 17, 2022
This important subject deserves a better book.
May 28, 2022
Maybe 2.5 stars. Interesting subject matter and a very important topic but poorly written. The narrator, Miriam was extremely irritating and it was hard to care about such a self- centred person. Although I should have had sympathies for the characters, they didn’t ring true for me. Maybe it would have been better if narrated by the daughter?
June 18, 2022
2.5 Important subject matter, but somehow didn’t execute well for me. Found myself skimming at times ..I found all the characters irritating and without substance. Just not for me , but acknowledge others have enjoyed it .
Read
February 14, 2022I finished The Mother a week ago and I'm still thinking about it daily. What an eye-opener! Jane Caro carefully captures our attention, building a compelling story about a family shattered by violence and loss. In some ways, the story was unbearably familiar thanks to news coverage of this serious issue, but Caro's depiction of the fear, manipulation and intimidation tactics was next level. Chilling, compulsive and confronting, with strong writing and excellent pace. Thanks to Allen & Unwin for a review copy, podcast interview with the author coming soon on the Words & Nerds podcast.
March 29, 2022
I admire Jane Caro and I love domestic thrillers, so I had high hopes for this book. I was a little disappointed, unfortunately. It moved quite slowly at first and the writing was quite stilted. But the last 100 pages made it more than worthwhile. It was thrilling, emotional, scary, and brave.
March 13, 2022
The Mother is the first novel for adults from Jane Caro, a Walkley Award winning columnist, writer, broadcaster, documentary maker, feminist, activist, advocate and 2022 Australian Senate candidate.
Miriam Duffy has always regretted the emotional distance between herself and her sensitive youngest daughter, Ally, and worries that after the sudden death of her husband, Ally’s father, their relationship will deteriorate further without Pete as a buffer. With Ally having recently wed after a whirlwind courtship, and moved some hours away with her handsome husband, veterinarian Nick, Miriam hopes to forge a better relationship with her daughter, so Miriam is hurt when Ally discourages her from visiting them, especially after the couple announce an unplanned pregnancy. Barely three months after Teddy’s birth Ally announces she is pregnant again, and Miriam is concerned when her son in law calls to tell her he’s worried about Ally’s state of mind. Miriam drops everything to rush to Ally’s aid and is surprised to find that her daughter is fine, just unsurprisingly tired and nauseous. The house is clean, Teddy is thriving, Nick seems solicitous, and the local mental health nurse seems satisfied Ally is well. So it comes as a shock when, three months after Isla is born, Miriam receives a call to alert her that Ally has left Nick, and she and the children are on their way to seek refuge with Miriam.
Though she wonders if Ally is perhaps overreacting to the normal stresses of marriage and parenting, Miriam listens in growing horror as it’s revealed that Ally has been subjected to an escalating campaign of manipulation, criticism, intimidation and control since the early days of their marriage, culminating in a terrifying assault. What the social worker describes is a pattern of behaviour labeled coercive control, a method of domestic violence, which is the core theme of The Mother. Caro exposes the insidious nature of the abuse that is wielded in relationships by an abuser to control their partner, slowly stripping them of their agency, without leaving the obvious marks of physical violence that might alert others. Ally’s experience is harrowing, and demonstrates how easily an abuser is able to exploit every vulnerability in their victim.
Almost worse perhaps is Ally’s journey to extricate herself from her relationship with him. Nick is furious she has left and immediately begins a campaign of harassment, supported by his parents. In NSW, where The Mother is set, coercive control as a method of domestic violence is yet to be recognised by the courts (though the government has committed to doing so), and Miriam is astonished by how little protection is available for Ally, with existing laws, including AVO’s, proving woefully inadequate.
While the divorce eventually goes through, four years later Nick still continues to intimidate Ally in ways that the law seems helpless to stop. When his threats escalate, and the law still refuses to intervene, Miriam makes a momentous choice. It took me a fair while to warm to Miriam, she’s pretty self involved, even with the excuse of grief. As to the decision she makes, I don’t see it as an admirable act, but in theory, I do see it as courageous, and regrettably necessary.
I admit to having to put the book down at certain points, upset and infuriated, particularly by the inaction of the law, because Ally’s experience all too accurately reflects real life. The author boldly points out the flaws in the justice system and in particular its repeated failures to protect women and children from violent men, with references to recent appalling crimes in Australia.
While I thought the story was well written, at times I thought a fraction more subtlety could have been effective. I did think the pacing was a little off too, the first half weighed down with detail that wasn’t really necessary to the story.
Nevertheless, The Mother is a powerful and thought-provoking read, providing insight into the issue of coercive control, and shining a light on the inadequacy of our current protections for the victims.
Miriam Duffy has always regretted the emotional distance between herself and her sensitive youngest daughter, Ally, and worries that after the sudden death of her husband, Ally’s father, their relationship will deteriorate further without Pete as a buffer. With Ally having recently wed after a whirlwind courtship, and moved some hours away with her handsome husband, veterinarian Nick, Miriam hopes to forge a better relationship with her daughter, so Miriam is hurt when Ally discourages her from visiting them, especially after the couple announce an unplanned pregnancy. Barely three months after Teddy’s birth Ally announces she is pregnant again, and Miriam is concerned when her son in law calls to tell her he’s worried about Ally’s state of mind. Miriam drops everything to rush to Ally’s aid and is surprised to find that her daughter is fine, just unsurprisingly tired and nauseous. The house is clean, Teddy is thriving, Nick seems solicitous, and the local mental health nurse seems satisfied Ally is well. So it comes as a shock when, three months after Isla is born, Miriam receives a call to alert her that Ally has left Nick, and she and the children are on their way to seek refuge with Miriam.
Though she wonders if Ally is perhaps overreacting to the normal stresses of marriage and parenting, Miriam listens in growing horror as it’s revealed that Ally has been subjected to an escalating campaign of manipulation, criticism, intimidation and control since the early days of their marriage, culminating in a terrifying assault. What the social worker describes is a pattern of behaviour labeled coercive control, a method of domestic violence, which is the core theme of The Mother. Caro exposes the insidious nature of the abuse that is wielded in relationships by an abuser to control their partner, slowly stripping them of their agency, without leaving the obvious marks of physical violence that might alert others. Ally’s experience is harrowing, and demonstrates how easily an abuser is able to exploit every vulnerability in their victim.
Almost worse perhaps is Ally’s journey to extricate herself from her relationship with him. Nick is furious she has left and immediately begins a campaign of harassment, supported by his parents. In NSW, where The Mother is set, coercive control as a method of domestic violence is yet to be recognised by the courts (though the government has committed to doing so), and Miriam is astonished by how little protection is available for Ally, with existing laws, including AVO’s, proving woefully inadequate.
While the divorce eventually goes through, four years later Nick still continues to intimidate Ally in ways that the law seems helpless to stop. When his threats escalate, and the law still refuses to intervene, Miriam makes a momentous choice. It took me a fair while to warm to Miriam, she’s pretty self involved, even with the excuse of grief. As to the decision she makes, I don’t see it as an admirable act, but in theory, I do see it as courageous, and regrettably necessary.
I admit to having to put the book down at certain points, upset and infuriated, particularly by the inaction of the law, because Ally’s experience all too accurately reflects real life. The author boldly points out the flaws in the justice system and in particular its repeated failures to protect women and children from violent men, with references to recent appalling crimes in Australia.
While I thought the story was well written, at times I thought a fraction more subtlety could have been effective. I did think the pacing was a little off too, the first half weighed down with detail that wasn’t really necessary to the story.
Nevertheless, The Mother is a powerful and thought-provoking read, providing insight into the issue of coercive control, and shining a light on the inadequacy of our current protections for the victims.
January 21, 2022
We know that as a journalist, Jane Caro is an excellent writer. The Mothers shows us that this talent transfers across as a fiction writer.
I felt this was written in a more procedural form than what we expect from a crime book such as this, almost as though Miriam was watching from a distance and trying to remember her thoughts and feelings at the time. This worked for this book as I can't imagine how much more of the feels it would give you. The first part of the book you can sense something building but you are not quite sure where it is going. Miriam almost seems a little clueless about what is going on in the world around her, more focused on her world and how if affected her. As she comes to more awareness, I feel that as the reader you breath a sigh of relief and think 'it's about time'.
Miriam then faces a dilemma that no mother ever should. What lengths would you go to in order to protect your child and those you love. Her choices are limited. The law limits options.
Caro takes time exploring the psychological games played by people in order to keep control of those within their vicinity. How they get people on their side and how they instil an absolute sense of fear in their victims.
If you were unaware of how horrible the law is skewed against victims of domestic abuse, The Mother will certainly open your eyes and give you a sense of absolute terror. Especially if you come from a loving family and have never known real fear.
Jane Caro makes a solid debut in to the world of adult fiction and I look forward to exploring more with her in the future.
I felt this was written in a more procedural form than what we expect from a crime book such as this, almost as though Miriam was watching from a distance and trying to remember her thoughts and feelings at the time. This worked for this book as I can't imagine how much more of the feels it would give you. The first part of the book you can sense something building but you are not quite sure where it is going. Miriam almost seems a little clueless about what is going on in the world around her, more focused on her world and how if affected her. As she comes to more awareness, I feel that as the reader you breath a sigh of relief and think 'it's about time'.
Miriam then faces a dilemma that no mother ever should. What lengths would you go to in order to protect your child and those you love. Her choices are limited. The law limits options.
Caro takes time exploring the psychological games played by people in order to keep control of those within their vicinity. How they get people on their side and how they instil an absolute sense of fear in their victims.
If you were unaware of how horrible the law is skewed against victims of domestic abuse, The Mother will certainly open your eyes and give you a sense of absolute terror. Especially if you come from a loving family and have never known real fear.
Jane Caro makes a solid debut in to the world of adult fiction and I look forward to exploring more with her in the future.
July 1, 2022
2.5 rounded down
This was a book of two halves for me. The first two thirds meandered along and I became quite bored and particularly frustrated by the repetitive nature of the writing. I don't believe that constantly telling me how much Miriam missed her recently departed husband, or that she thought herself an inadequate mother, in any way increased the impact of the themes that were central to the novel. Nor did it endear me to her in any way. In fact, by three quarters through I had come to quite dislike Miriam and was overwhelmed by her constant and quite juvenile 'it's all about me' attitude. Meanwhile the last quarter of the book raced through a 10 year time line skimming over the truly important events and consequences.
There are books out there, fiction and non-fiction, which do justice to this important topic. This one did not.
This was a book of two halves for me. The first two thirds meandered along and I became quite bored and particularly frustrated by the repetitive nature of the writing. I don't believe that constantly telling me how much Miriam missed her recently departed husband, or that she thought herself an inadequate mother, in any way increased the impact of the themes that were central to the novel. Nor did it endear me to her in any way. In fact, by three quarters through I had come to quite dislike Miriam and was overwhelmed by her constant and quite juvenile 'it's all about me' attitude. Meanwhile the last quarter of the book raced through a 10 year time line skimming over the truly important events and consequences.
There are books out there, fiction and non-fiction, which do justice to this important topic. This one did not.
July 7, 2024
This read more like a memoir, which made the narrative format feel a bit amateurish. Nevertheless, I found it somewhat compelling, if a little clumsy. Important subject matter, no doubt, but this is not genre fiction such as mystery or thriller. No red herrings, just a series of events and a bit too much of the protagonist's internal dialogue. I do appreciate the author's dedication to the harm to women caused by coercive men - something which for most of history has been overlooked.
April 28, 2022
‘Can I help you?’
The novel opens with Miriam in a gun shop in Wollongong. She’s buying a gun. Why?
A few years earlier, Miriam Duffy, a successful real estate agent on Sydney’s north shore is happily married to Pete Franklin. Miriam and Peter are in their sixties, with two adult daughters. Fiona is married to Liam with a daughter, Molly, and Allison (Ally) has just married veterinarian Nick. And then Miriam’s life is turned upside down. Pete dies suddenly. Ally and Nick have moved to Dungog, where Nick joins a veterinary practice. Miriam has never enjoyed an easy relationship with Ally, but she wants very much to support Ally when she becomes pregnant. How can Miriam balance giving Ally the space she seems to need with showing that she cares? Ally makes this difficult when she seems reluctant to see Miriam. After Ally’s son, Teddy, is born, Nick and Ally each provide Miriam with differing accounts of how well Ally is managing. Soon after, Ally becomes pregnant again.
While I could see where this story was going, I did not anticipate all the twists that lead to Miriam buying a gun. Coercive control, emotional and physical abuse are all part of the story, as is the ineffectiveness of legal protection in at least some cases of domestic violence.
Ms Caro raises several important issues in this, her first, novel. An uncomfortable read. As I finished the story, I wondered what I might do in a similar situation.
Jennifer Cameron-Smith
The novel opens with Miriam in a gun shop in Wollongong. She’s buying a gun. Why?
A few years earlier, Miriam Duffy, a successful real estate agent on Sydney’s north shore is happily married to Pete Franklin. Miriam and Peter are in their sixties, with two adult daughters. Fiona is married to Liam with a daughter, Molly, and Allison (Ally) has just married veterinarian Nick. And then Miriam’s life is turned upside down. Pete dies suddenly. Ally and Nick have moved to Dungog, where Nick joins a veterinary practice. Miriam has never enjoyed an easy relationship with Ally, but she wants very much to support Ally when she becomes pregnant. How can Miriam balance giving Ally the space she seems to need with showing that she cares? Ally makes this difficult when she seems reluctant to see Miriam. After Ally’s son, Teddy, is born, Nick and Ally each provide Miriam with differing accounts of how well Ally is managing. Soon after, Ally becomes pregnant again.
While I could see where this story was going, I did not anticipate all the twists that lead to Miriam buying a gun. Coercive control, emotional and physical abuse are all part of the story, as is the ineffectiveness of legal protection in at least some cases of domestic violence.
Ms Caro raises several important issues in this, her first, novel. An uncomfortable read. As I finished the story, I wondered what I might do in a similar situation.
Jennifer Cameron-Smith
December 8, 2025
As part of a challenge (25in2025) this choice was picked from that unread pile.
The end of the year is almost upon us and I want to complete the #25in2025challenge with six books left my next choice was Jane Caro The Mother.
A thrilling domestic drama that sent chills up my spine.
This is such a great read and I can highly recommend it.
A mother will do anything for her family….
Miriam Duffy is not long widowed, a loving mother and grandmother and a successful real estate business owner.
She is very happy for her daughter Ally to be marrying the man of her dreams.
Months after the wedding, things on the surface look as though it’s all ok but there’s more going on that Ally is not saying.
When it’s reaches breaking point, police are called but there’s no much they can do.
Then Miriam steps in and takes matters into her own hands….
A gripping, riveting and powerful read.
It will make your heart pound and your reading mind mighty.
The realism, the raw and the authenticity of this story feels spot on making it thought provoking and current.
A book that is of great value.
The end of the year is almost upon us and I want to complete the #25in2025challenge with six books left my next choice was Jane Caro The Mother.
A thrilling domestic drama that sent chills up my spine.
This is such a great read and I can highly recommend it.
A mother will do anything for her family….
Miriam Duffy is not long widowed, a loving mother and grandmother and a successful real estate business owner.
She is very happy for her daughter Ally to be marrying the man of her dreams.
Months after the wedding, things on the surface look as though it’s all ok but there’s more going on that Ally is not saying.
When it’s reaches breaking point, police are called but there’s no much they can do.
Then Miriam steps in and takes matters into her own hands….
A gripping, riveting and powerful read.
It will make your heart pound and your reading mind mighty.
The realism, the raw and the authenticity of this story feels spot on making it thought provoking and current.
A book that is of great value.
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