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An Inconvenient Corpse
These absurdist stories document the author’s daily commute to and from work. They are not the sort of adventures and mishaps one commonly experiences. Quite the contrary. Readers are hereby cautioned that these deceptively brief and whimsical tales contain unexpected speed bumps. Laugh at your own risk.
Jason E. Rolfe is a worthy successor to the great French humorist Alphonse Allais.
Jason E. Rolfe is a worthy successor to the great French humorist Alphonse Allais.
66 pages, Paperback
First published October 8, 2014
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Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews
November 19, 2014
If this makes you smile --
"Death wasn’t the only bit of foreshadowing I missed. Sure, it was the most obvious and should have convinced me to call in sick, but as I’ve already explained, I missed it entirely. Other examples of the foreshadowing I missed on my way to work this morning included:
"1. A large group of skeletons dancing atop their coffins in the field at the corner of Merritt and Riverview.
"2. Nicholas Poussin actually painting Et in Arcadia ego whilst sipping coffee at the small café on Keil.
"3. Several winged angels looking down from a cloud above my place of employment, waving hello and shouting my name.
"4. A screaming banshee that followed my car from house to office.
"5. A decaying cadaver selling clocks, hourglasses, sundials, and other timepieces that brought to mind the inevitable passage of time.
"6. A candle that bore witness to the passing of said time and the fact that, like life, it too would eventually burn itself out.
"7. A man wearing a sandwich-board sign which read The End is Nigh, Jason E. Rolfe.
"In short, I apparently missed a veritable vanitas painting’s worth of foreshadowing on the way to work this morning. As I mentioned earlier, I was preoccupied with memories of Cape Cod and anxieties about the work awaiting my return, so I shouldn’t be blamed entirely for missing these things.
"When I finally did arrive at work I went directly to a small meeting room on the second floor. I sat down, sipped my morning coffee, and waited. I thought I had more time than I actually did, because before too long the door opened and a grave entered the room.
"'You’re early,' I said, unable to mask my surprise."
-- Then you should try AN INCONVENIENT CORPSE, by Jason E. Rolfe, a short collection of absurdist vignettes about the perils and the joys... well, no, about the perils and the perils of going to work each day.
I can't resist: here's another quotation.
"My personal view is that the ‘laws’ of physics aren’t so much ‘laws’ as rudimentary ‘guidelines’. I mean seriously, who really drives the posted speed limit? We’re all doing, like, ten over, right? If we happen to travel a bit faster than the speed of light, are the physics police really going to pull us over? I don’t think so. They have their hands full trying to explain string theory to laymen with their witty ‘pop science’ New York Times best sellers."
"Death wasn’t the only bit of foreshadowing I missed. Sure, it was the most obvious and should have convinced me to call in sick, but as I’ve already explained, I missed it entirely. Other examples of the foreshadowing I missed on my way to work this morning included:
"1. A large group of skeletons dancing atop their coffins in the field at the corner of Merritt and Riverview.
"2. Nicholas Poussin actually painting Et in Arcadia ego whilst sipping coffee at the small café on Keil.
"3. Several winged angels looking down from a cloud above my place of employment, waving hello and shouting my name.
"4. A screaming banshee that followed my car from house to office.
"5. A decaying cadaver selling clocks, hourglasses, sundials, and other timepieces that brought to mind the inevitable passage of time.
"6. A candle that bore witness to the passing of said time and the fact that, like life, it too would eventually burn itself out.
"7. A man wearing a sandwich-board sign which read The End is Nigh, Jason E. Rolfe.
"In short, I apparently missed a veritable vanitas painting’s worth of foreshadowing on the way to work this morning. As I mentioned earlier, I was preoccupied with memories of Cape Cod and anxieties about the work awaiting my return, so I shouldn’t be blamed entirely for missing these things.
"When I finally did arrive at work I went directly to a small meeting room on the second floor. I sat down, sipped my morning coffee, and waited. I thought I had more time than I actually did, because before too long the door opened and a grave entered the room.
"'You’re early,' I said, unable to mask my surprise."
-- Then you should try AN INCONVENIENT CORPSE, by Jason E. Rolfe, a short collection of absurdist vignettes about the perils and the joys... well, no, about the perils and the perils of going to work each day.
I can't resist: here's another quotation.
"My personal view is that the ‘laws’ of physics aren’t so much ‘laws’ as rudimentary ‘guidelines’. I mean seriously, who really drives the posted speed limit? We’re all doing, like, ten over, right? If we happen to travel a bit faster than the speed of light, are the physics police really going to pull us over? I don’t think so. They have their hands full trying to explain string theory to laymen with their witty ‘pop science’ New York Times best sellers."
October 4, 2017
'An Inconvenient Corpse' is an absolutely wonderful collection of short, often hilarious, absurdist tales by Jason E. Rolfe. His hapless protagonist encounters all manner of amusing oddities on his way to work, among them: a younger version of himself, a bottle of Prozac, a rejection letter, a Mexican piñata, Ferdinand Magellan, an "irate group of Lapu Lapu's fiercest warriors" (ask poor Magellan), a rejection letter, the Grim Reaper, clocks (of course), a "medium sized blue whale", and —it goes without saying, but I'll say it anyway—a (very) inconvenient corpse. There are guest appearances by a number of folks (fellow writers/social media friends), who will be delighted and perhaps surprised to find themselves in these pages. Often droll and peppered with puns and slapstick pratfalls, these stories are sure to delight.
My faves include: "Time Flies", "The Self-Consistency Scenario", "Make Every Day Count","Self-Doubt", "An Inconvenient Corpse", "New Wooden Bench", "A Public Service Announcement", "Magellan's Revenge", "The Letter Killers", & "Mexican Piñata Blues", among others.
https://jasonrolfe.wordpress.com/
My faves include: "Time Flies", "The Self-Consistency Scenario", "Make Every Day Count","Self-Doubt", "An Inconvenient Corpse", "New Wooden Bench", "A Public Service Announcement", "Magellan's Revenge", "The Letter Killers", & "Mexican Piñata Blues", among others.
https://jasonrolfe.wordpress.com/
November 7, 2021
A clever short pocket murder mystery with a steady source of humor, twists and revelations to keep you entertained throughout this short mystery. Acquire " A n Inconvenient Corpse " today. 😉😀Kat
Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews