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Surviving Aggressive People: Practical Violence Prevention Skills for the Workplace and the Street
Whether an aggressor is a seasoned predator or an irate individual, hostility is almost always preceded by warning signs--if we know what to look for. Surviving Aggressive People dissects the psychology of aggression. It exposes the subtle cues of impending violence and offers timeless methods for transforming a potential disaster into a peaceful victory. Using time-tested methods for conflict management and crisis intervention, this book offers persuasion and peacemaking skills that historically have been reserved for law enforcement, psychologists, and other professionals working the front lines of emotionally charged situations. In today's world, these skills are a must for everyone. Newly updated, with a special appendix for healthcare workers, the enduring knowledge in Surviving Aggressive People can help deter hostility before it spins out of control. It might even save your life.
268 pages, Paperback
First published September 10, 2003
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Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
December 29, 2019
Агресията има различни форми и д-р Шон Т. Смит, дългогодишен клиничен психолог и семеен терапевт се е опитал да създаде изчерпателен наръчник за справянето, доколкото е възможно, с хората, които я проявяват. Опитът му може да не е кой знае колко изчерпателен, но определено е полезен и казва някои нови неща, които не са застъпени в най-добрата книга по въпроса и дори само за това заслужава прочитане.
Откровенията му за разликата между "защитаващата" и "професионалната" агресия обаче аз лично намирам за много новаторски и важни. "Защитаващата" агресия е породена от емоционалните опити за защита на егото и самоутвърждаване, докато "професионалната" е нарочна с цел постигане на някаква цел (сплашване основно).
В работата си всекидневно се сблъсквам с опити и за двата вида и в книгата много уместно е споменато, че те често се преливат един в друг в зависимост от ситуацията и реакцията на "жертвата".
Също така никъде другаде не съм срещал и е интересно и полезно да се знае, за ритуалите на агресията - за започването с невинно леко настъпване на личните граници и възпитание и постепенното ескалиране.
Като негатив на книгата бих посочил, че според мен авторът определено не е имал особено много (ако и изобщо) преки срещи с агресивни хора, поради което написаното от него страда от известно интелектуалничене с уклон към типичното псевдо-интелектуално позьорство, с което се отличават много психологически писания. Но все пак заслужава внимание.
Откровенията му за разликата между "защитаващата" и "професионалната" агресия обаче аз лично намирам за много новаторски и важни. "Защитаващата" агресия е породена от емоционалните опити за защита на егото и самоутвърждаване, докато "професионалната" е нарочна с цел постигане на някаква цел (сплашване основно).
В работата си всекидневно се сблъсквам с опити и за двата вида и в книгата много уместно е споменато, че те често се преливат един в друг в зависимост от ситуацията и реакцията на "жертвата".
Също така никъде другаде не съм срещал и е интересно и полезно да се знае, за ритуалите на агресията - за започването с невинно леко настъпване на личните граници и възпитание и постепенното ескалиране.
Като негатив на книгата бих посочил, че според мен авторът определено не е имал особено много (ако и изобщо) преки срещи с агресивни хора, поради което написаното от него страда от известно интелектуалничене с уклон към типичното псевдо-интелектуално позьорство, с което се отличават много психологически писания. Но все пак заслужава внимание.
December 19, 2019
Most of us have encountered aggressive people in our lives, and if we work with the public we probably do so on a daily basis. How can concerned readers prepare themselves for future instances of the same? Shawn T. Smith is a psychologist with a background in counseling and corrections, and previously who served as a member of the Guardian Angels in Denver, a citizen-driven neighborhood security organization. In Surviving Aggressive People, he offers readers an analysis of the two main groups of aggressive behavior they can expect to encounter, and offers separate advice for each.
Smith sees aggressive behavior as being either desperate or deliberate (“expert” is the word he uses). Desperate aggression is usually context or incident driven: a person who feels cornered resorts to lashing out in an adrenaline-induced reaction. Expert aggression, on the other hand, is planned, and has a defined goal in mind – whether that be robbery, rape, or the simple ego boost of pushing someone else around. Both types of aggressive behavior have warning signs, and in expert/deliberate behavior, these can be quite elaborate: human predators, like their counterparts throughout the animal kingdom, have ‘rituals’ that precede the violence.
In both types of aggression, the primary goal from Smith’s perspective is escape – and not simply escape from a situation that one is already in, but avoiding them altogether by paying attention to warning signs. Throughout Surviving Aggressive People, Shawn beats the drum: pay. attention.to.your.instincts. Trust your gut. Intuition, he argues, is not irrational; it’s merely your subconscious processing the environment on its own, the primal brain at work beneath the conscious.
Responding to desperate aggression mostly involves communicating with them, talking with them in a deliberate way to find out what they need. Expert aggression is more varied, but Shawn advises readers to be aware of the most common tactics — information overload, sympathy etc and to assert themselves from the beginning, challenging the aggressive when they are still beginning their approach. Most predators will back of and look for easier prey if they are regarded with open, challenging eyes, pointed questions, or resistance straight from the gate. If they’re persistent, at the very least an outright challenge keeps them from closing and attacking in an ambush. Shawn wraps up the book by reviewing the main points, and then discussing the merits of some martial arts styles – -though he cautions the reader, in using them or any kind of weapon, that they must practice constantly and be aware of the style’s or the weapon’s limitations. (Pepper spray, for instance can literally backfire if it’s used against the wind…so exercise caution.)
How to Survive Aggressive People strikes me as a useful resource, although it does not include information on dealing with people who are mentally unstable owing to substance abuse. I was introduced to the book a few years ago via an interview with the author on The Art of Manliness; you may view a transcript here which might give you a more comprehensive review of the contents.
Smith sees aggressive behavior as being either desperate or deliberate (“expert” is the word he uses). Desperate aggression is usually context or incident driven: a person who feels cornered resorts to lashing out in an adrenaline-induced reaction. Expert aggression, on the other hand, is planned, and has a defined goal in mind – whether that be robbery, rape, or the simple ego boost of pushing someone else around. Both types of aggressive behavior have warning signs, and in expert/deliberate behavior, these can be quite elaborate: human predators, like their counterparts throughout the animal kingdom, have ‘rituals’ that precede the violence.
In both types of aggression, the primary goal from Smith’s perspective is escape – and not simply escape from a situation that one is already in, but avoiding them altogether by paying attention to warning signs. Throughout Surviving Aggressive People, Shawn beats the drum: pay. attention.to.your.instincts. Trust your gut. Intuition, he argues, is not irrational; it’s merely your subconscious processing the environment on its own, the primal brain at work beneath the conscious.
Responding to desperate aggression mostly involves communicating with them, talking with them in a deliberate way to find out what they need. Expert aggression is more varied, but Shawn advises readers to be aware of the most common tactics — information overload, sympathy etc and to assert themselves from the beginning, challenging the aggressive when they are still beginning their approach. Most predators will back of and look for easier prey if they are regarded with open, challenging eyes, pointed questions, or resistance straight from the gate. If they’re persistent, at the very least an outright challenge keeps them from closing and attacking in an ambush. Shawn wraps up the book by reviewing the main points, and then discussing the merits of some martial arts styles – -though he cautions the reader, in using them or any kind of weapon, that they must practice constantly and be aware of the style’s or the weapon’s limitations. (Pepper spray, for instance can literally backfire if it’s used against the wind…so exercise caution.)
How to Survive Aggressive People strikes me as a useful resource, although it does not include information on dealing with people who are mentally unstable owing to substance abuse. I was introduced to the book a few years ago via an interview with the author on The Art of Manliness; you may view a transcript here which might give you a more comprehensive review of the contents.
November 18, 2014
This is a great resource on how to avoid and escape conflict. In fact, I've been very successful at diffusing situations after incorporating the techniques from this book into my job. Highly recommended.
January 5, 2015
This book distinguishes desperate aggression from expert aggression by providing the warning signs of each. It advises how to de-escalate, or altogether avoid, potentially hostile outcomes. Unlike any other book of its type which I have read this second edition devotes a section to neurobehavioral disorders providing advisements for mediation with patients who have difficulty curbing aggressive impulses. The segments on desperate aggression are applicable to many career situations and would be a valuable skill set to develop. I found the information on expert aggression immediately useful towards dealing with problematic panhandlers, which was what initially attracted me to the book.
September 9, 2010
A highly pertinent, informative book. Discusses the warning signs of impeding violence, the dangers involved, and potentially lifesaving techniques (mental, emotional, verbal -- actual physical defense is outside the scope of this title) without fearmongering. Highly insightful, especially the discussion of "testing rituals" from Expert Aggressors (people interested in attacking you for profit rather than out of desperation).
Highly recommended, especially for women.
Highly recommended, especially for women.
December 29, 2018
Great tips, with research references!
October 28, 2019
Awesome book!
It is hard to find a book where the author chooses to be honest, most authors chose to be politically correct in exchange for content related to reality.
It is hard to find a book where the author chooses to be honest, most authors chose to be politically correct in exchange for content related to reality.
August 10, 2021
Good guide to how to deal with aggressive people and get out of sticky situations.
November 5, 2021
extremely useful
September 9, 2016
great book!
March 17, 2015
Good examples of how to handle things when they go terribly wrong. I wonder if I'll ever rise to the quickness of the warrior personality? None the less allowed some food for thought.
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews