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The Balancing Act: Creating Healthy Dependency and Connection Without Losing Yourself
From the bestselling author of Set Boundaries, Find Peace, a guide to understanding healthy dependency—to bring our relationships back into balance
I need some space.
Why are you so distant?
You want more than I can give.
Every relationship in our lives – from love and close friendship to extended family and our wider social circle – is a balancing act. If we give too much, we begin to lose ourselves. If we protect ourselves too much, we lose the closeness we all need. Getting the balance right is how we find more connection, authenticity, and joy.
The Balancing Act is a roadmap for finding that balance. With her signature blend of clarity and compassion, therapist Nedra Glover Tawwab sheds light on healthy dependency, and how to achieve it. Along the way, she unpacks buzzwords and trending topics including codependency, attachment styles, inner family systems, and more – offering practical advice for recognizing our needs, navigating conflict, and finding more harmony with the important people in our lives.
Whether you’re yearning for more trust with a spouse or partner, more clarity with a best friend or sibling, or more agency in how you show up in the world, these insights will help you reevaluate, reset, and relate better.
I need some space.
Why are you so distant?
You want more than I can give.
Every relationship in our lives – from love and close friendship to extended family and our wider social circle – is a balancing act. If we give too much, we begin to lose ourselves. If we protect ourselves too much, we lose the closeness we all need. Getting the balance right is how we find more connection, authenticity, and joy.
The Balancing Act is a roadmap for finding that balance. With her signature blend of clarity and compassion, therapist Nedra Glover Tawwab sheds light on healthy dependency, and how to achieve it. Along the way, she unpacks buzzwords and trending topics including codependency, attachment styles, inner family systems, and more – offering practical advice for recognizing our needs, navigating conflict, and finding more harmony with the important people in our lives.
Whether you’re yearning for more trust with a spouse or partner, more clarity with a best friend or sibling, or more agency in how you show up in the world, these insights will help you reevaluate, reset, and relate better.
256 pages, Hardcover
Published February 10, 2026
About the author
Nedra Glover Tawwab
44 books1,472 followersTherapist, NYT Bestselling Author, and Relationship Expert.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 82 reviews
March 10, 2026
Oh I do love a Nedra book! As a therapist I am often recommending her books and resources to clients, as well as getting so much out of them myself. I love how she gets across different concepts so simply while also appreciating all the nuances of building healthy relationships. In the age of black-and-white social media “therapy”, it is very refreshing! Lots of takeaways from this one although I did feel there were more tangible strategies for hyper independent folks versus the hyper dependent ones. There’s plenty of case studies and example scripts that really brought the ideas to life. Everyone needs to read this book really so would definitely recommend!
February 20, 2026
Book #21 of 2026!
4.5 stars
What to expect in this book:
-Self-help
-Psychology
-Relational exploration
-Interpersonal boundaries
Thoughts
Thank you so much to @prhaudio for the gifted audiobook!
Nedra can do no wrong!!! I recommend her books almost on a daily basis to my therapy clients and find her books so applicable and digestible for anyone. As a mental health therapist myself, it is helpful to have resources to point clients and friends to regarding creating healthy relationships. Nedra expands on boundaries and relationships more in The Balancing Act by discussing through her experiences and anecdotes from her own practice about the processes of relational dependency. Nedra informs readers of healthy dependency by discussing attachment theory and different types of desires for emotional closeness. I will definitely be using this in my practice.
If you love to learn more about how to be in healthy relationships, this is a wonderful resource.
4.5 stars
What to expect in this book:
-Self-help
-Psychology
-Relational exploration
-Interpersonal boundaries
Thoughts
Thank you so much to @prhaudio for the gifted audiobook!
Nedra can do no wrong!!! I recommend her books almost on a daily basis to my therapy clients and find her books so applicable and digestible for anyone. As a mental health therapist myself, it is helpful to have resources to point clients and friends to regarding creating healthy relationships. Nedra expands on boundaries and relationships more in The Balancing Act by discussing through her experiences and anecdotes from her own practice about the processes of relational dependency. Nedra informs readers of healthy dependency by discussing attachment theory and different types of desires for emotional closeness. I will definitely be using this in my practice.
If you love to learn more about how to be in healthy relationships, this is a wonderful resource.
April 18, 2026
I love Nedra'a books! Listening is like a mini therapy session when you need it. I need to download all her books in audiobook format because most I've read the physical copies.
May 5, 2026
Healthy relationships require finding the middle ground between two destructive extremes: giving so much of yourself that you disappear, or protecting yourself so fiercely that nobody can reach you. Our earliest experiences wire us toward one extreme or the other, but these patterns can be recognized and changed through honest self-reflection, deliberate practice, and the willingness to be vulnerable.
Ultimately, sustaining meaningful connections isn’t about grand gestures or perfect compatibility – it’s about showing up consistently, communicating your needs clearly, accepting help when it’s offered, and choosing connection over perfection even when people inevitably fall short.
Ultimately, sustaining meaningful connections isn’t about grand gestures or perfect compatibility – it’s about showing up consistently, communicating your needs clearly, accepting help when it’s offered, and choosing connection over perfection even when people inevitably fall short.
February 24, 2026
“When you feel hurt or anxious because someone set a boundary with you, ask yourself if you're projecting your insecurities onto the relationship. Ask yourself when you first felt this way. What were the circumstances, and who was involved? Understanding the origins of the hurt and anxiety can help you feel more centered and calm.”
I love This Book!
I love This Book!
February 10, 2026
A thoughtful resource for navigating relationships without losing yourself.
Each of Nedra Glover Tawwab’s books has found me at a moment when I truly needed it. Set Boundaries, Find Peace gave me the language to begin healing an inner child who was never allowed autonomy. Drama Free helped me think more intentionally about boundaries and breaking cycles during a season of deep family change.
This book arrived during a different phase of my life. As I navigate healthier romantic relationships, a new question has surfaced for me: what actually makes a relationship healthy? Not just boundaries, but balance. Not just independence, but connection.
What I appreciate most about this book is that it feels like a resource I can return to as I navigate relationships. It clearly defines concepts that are often sensationalized or misused in pop culture, and the reflections invite honesty without shame. This is not a book to binge quickly. I found myself wanting to slow down after reading too fast, because it is meant to be savored and used for reflection.
I have used Nedra’s books alongside therapy before, and this one is no different. More than anything, this book reassured my nervous system that I am not alone, and that it is okay to still be learning these things. I would especially recommend it to anyone at the beginning of their healing journey, or to those who want to better understand themselves in relationships without losing who they are.
Each of Nedra Glover Tawwab’s books has found me at a moment when I truly needed it. Set Boundaries, Find Peace gave me the language to begin healing an inner child who was never allowed autonomy. Drama Free helped me think more intentionally about boundaries and breaking cycles during a season of deep family change.
This book arrived during a different phase of my life. As I navigate healthier romantic relationships, a new question has surfaced for me: what actually makes a relationship healthy? Not just boundaries, but balance. Not just independence, but connection.
What I appreciate most about this book is that it feels like a resource I can return to as I navigate relationships. It clearly defines concepts that are often sensationalized or misused in pop culture, and the reflections invite honesty without shame. This is not a book to binge quickly. I found myself wanting to slow down after reading too fast, because it is meant to be savored and used for reflection.
I have used Nedra’s books alongside therapy before, and this one is no different. More than anything, this book reassured my nervous system that I am not alone, and that it is okay to still be learning these things. I would especially recommend it to anyone at the beginning of their healing journey, or to those who want to better understand themselves in relationships without losing who they are.
July 28, 2026
This book came at the perfect time in my life. The book does an incredible job explaining how to build healthy, connected relationships without losing yourself in the process. My biggest takeaways: boundaries strengthen relationships, you can love people without carrying their burdens, and it’s okay to prioritize your own well-being. Practical, validating, and one I’ll definitely revisit. Highly recommend!
April 30, 2026
Great information on how to maintain healthy relationships with friends, family and partners.
I always enjoy learning about why people do the things they do.
I always enjoy learning about why people do the things they do.
June 21, 2026
Nedra Glover gets you to look at your relationships with people. It can be quite challenging at times, as you realise where you are, but it gives you a roadmap to build better relationships.
April 19, 2026
4.5 ⭐️ because there were moments that I personally struggled to connect to but overall I felt this book does a good job explaining the importance of relationships and how to identify, foster and maintain healthy boundaries in your relationships
May 4, 2026
In a sea of nonfiction books that are focused on individualism this book felt like a breath of fresh air.It shines a light to our social and communal nature paired with ways we can use communication and openness to maintain and deepen the connections in our lives. And of course the grace we all wish to be given for our human mistakes and our imperfections. The only missing part for me was a more in depth look at the systems that shape our society today and push us more towards individualism and also how this topic is reflected in different cultures. Overall made me hopeful.
February 12, 2026
Nedra Tawwab has a gift for explaining relationship dynamics in a way that is clear, compassionate, and actionable. The Balancing Act helped me understand the difference between closeness and enmeshment and reminded me that healthy relationships require both connection and independence. It’s a timely read for anyone doing personal growth work and wanting to build stronger, more intentional relationships. My favorite quote from the book - “Vulnerability is what makes our connections deeper, not the amount of time we spend together or the relationship title.”
February 11, 2026
Book Review: The Balancing Act: Creating Healthy Dependency
The Balancing Act: Creating Healthy Dependency offers a thoughtful and compassionate exploration of one of the most misunderstood concepts in emotional development: dependency. In this reflective nonfiction work, Judith Viorst challenges the cultural ideal of complete independence and instead argues that healthy dependency is not a weakness, but a necessary and lifelong component of human well-being.
Viorst draws on psychology, personal insight, and everyday examples to show how people move through cycles of dependence and independence across the lifespan. From childhood attachments to adult relationships, she illustrates that emotional health is rooted in balance—knowing when to rely on others and when to stand on one’s own. The book gently dismantles the notion that needing support signals failure, reframing it as a sign of emotional maturity and self-awareness.
The writing is accessible, conversational, and quietly reassuring. Viorst avoids clinical heaviness, making complex psychological ideas feel relatable and grounded in real life. Her reflections resonate especially strongly in discussions of relationships, caregiving, aging, and loss, where dependency often resurfaces in ways people may resist or feel ashamed of.
One of the book’s strengths is its validation of vulnerability. Rather than promoting rigid self-sufficiency, The Balancing Act encourages readers to embrace interdependence—the idea that giving and receiving support are equally valuable. This perspective feels especially relevant in a society that often prizes productivity and emotional stoicism over connection.
This book is well suited for readers interested in psychology, personal growth, and emotional resilience. Calm, insightful, and affirming, The Balancing Act: Creating Healthy Dependency ultimately reminds readers that strength does not come from standing alone, but from learning how to lean—wisely, intentionally, and without shame.
The Balancing Act: Creating Healthy Dependency offers a thoughtful and compassionate exploration of one of the most misunderstood concepts in emotional development: dependency. In this reflective nonfiction work, Judith Viorst challenges the cultural ideal of complete independence and instead argues that healthy dependency is not a weakness, but a necessary and lifelong component of human well-being.
Viorst draws on psychology, personal insight, and everyday examples to show how people move through cycles of dependence and independence across the lifespan. From childhood attachments to adult relationships, she illustrates that emotional health is rooted in balance—knowing when to rely on others and when to stand on one’s own. The book gently dismantles the notion that needing support signals failure, reframing it as a sign of emotional maturity and self-awareness.
The writing is accessible, conversational, and quietly reassuring. Viorst avoids clinical heaviness, making complex psychological ideas feel relatable and grounded in real life. Her reflections resonate especially strongly in discussions of relationships, caregiving, aging, and loss, where dependency often resurfaces in ways people may resist or feel ashamed of.
One of the book’s strengths is its validation of vulnerability. Rather than promoting rigid self-sufficiency, The Balancing Act encourages readers to embrace interdependence—the idea that giving and receiving support are equally valuable. This perspective feels especially relevant in a society that often prizes productivity and emotional stoicism over connection.
This book is well suited for readers interested in psychology, personal growth, and emotional resilience. Calm, insightful, and affirming, The Balancing Act: Creating Healthy Dependency ultimately reminds readers that strength does not come from standing alone, but from learning how to lean—wisely, intentionally, and without shame.
March 28, 2026
Nedra Glover Tawwab continues to deliver practical, grounded insights on relationships in The Balancing Act. As a longtime reader of her work (especially “Set Boundaries, Find Peace” - my personal favorite -) and “Drama Free” this book felt like a natural extension of her core ideas, this time focusing on the spectrum between independence and dependence in our relationships.
She explores how we relate to others/ family, friends, partners, and community, through the lens of healthy vs. unhealthy dependency. As in her previous books, what stands out is her clarity and the abundance of real-life examples that make her concepts easy to understand and apply. Her work is consistently rooted in experience and psychological insight, which makes it both trustworthy and actionable.
That said, some ideas may feel familiar if you’ve read her earlier books, which is why this wasn’t a full 5-star read for me. Still, her work is the kind you revisit over time, because different lessons resonate depending on where you are in life.
If you’re looking to build healthier relationships and deepen your self-awareness, this is absolutely worth reading. I’ll continue to pick up anything Nedra writes. her voice remains one I trust and return to often.
PS. Listened to this one on audible, it’s awesome listening to her !
She explores how we relate to others/ family, friends, partners, and community, through the lens of healthy vs. unhealthy dependency. As in her previous books, what stands out is her clarity and the abundance of real-life examples that make her concepts easy to understand and apply. Her work is consistently rooted in experience and psychological insight, which makes it both trustworthy and actionable.
That said, some ideas may feel familiar if you’ve read her earlier books, which is why this wasn’t a full 5-star read for me. Still, her work is the kind you revisit over time, because different lessons resonate depending on where you are in life.
If you’re looking to build healthier relationships and deepen your self-awareness, this is absolutely worth reading. I’ll continue to pick up anything Nedra writes. her voice remains one I trust and return to often.
PS. Listened to this one on audible, it’s awesome listening to her !
August 17, 2026
In The Balancing Act by Nedra Glover Tawwab, she explores how to manage the competing demands of life without losing yourself in the process. It’s really about boundaries, priorities, self-awareness, and figuring out what actually deserves your time and energy.
The Balancing Act was another excellent listen for me.
One of the things I appreciate most about Tawwab’s work is how thorough she is. Her research, observations, and real-life examples make the concepts easy to understand without oversimplifying them. She doesn’t just tell you what other people may be doing wrong—she consistently brings the focus back to self-awareness and personal accountability.
That’s what made this one especially useful. There are plenty of opportunities to examine your own patterns, choices, boundaries, and expectations instead of simply pointing the finger at everyone around you.
Her writing is thoughtful, clear, and easy to follow, and it translated beautifully to audio. I never felt like I was being lectured; it felt more like being walked through a series of honest questions worth asking yourself.
I continue to enjoy Nedra Glover Tawwab’s books because they give me practical things to think about and apply long after I finish them.
Well researched, accessible, reflective, and genuinely useful. Another five-star listen, and I’m looking forward to whatever she writes next.
The Balancing Act was another excellent listen for me.
One of the things I appreciate most about Tawwab’s work is how thorough she is. Her research, observations, and real-life examples make the concepts easy to understand without oversimplifying them. She doesn’t just tell you what other people may be doing wrong—she consistently brings the focus back to self-awareness and personal accountability.
That’s what made this one especially useful. There are plenty of opportunities to examine your own patterns, choices, boundaries, and expectations instead of simply pointing the finger at everyone around you.
Her writing is thoughtful, clear, and easy to follow, and it translated beautifully to audio. I never felt like I was being lectured; it felt more like being walked through a series of honest questions worth asking yourself.
I continue to enjoy Nedra Glover Tawwab’s books because they give me practical things to think about and apply long after I finish them.
Well researched, accessible, reflective, and genuinely useful. Another five-star listen, and I’m looking forward to whatever she writes next.
February 14, 2026
This book is a great book to have in your toolbox. It provides simple, yet practical ways to manage relationships of any kind. It encourages us to see each individual for who they are and suggests that we expand our supports and identify different people for different aspects of our lives. “When a relationship limits your ability to have connections with others it’s unhealthy.”
While Glover is definitely an advocate for boundaries she also makes space for the idea that relationships may require some flexibility and reminds us that we’re all human and we will make mistakes. “Imperfect relationships are not failures. They are testaments to the value of our connections.”
At the end of each chapter she provides reflective questions that asks us to be curious about ourselves, our feelings and how we might be showing up in our relationships.
“Avoiding discomfort will keep you stuck in the same situation that you’d like to change.” If you’re feeling stuck in some of your relationships this books is great place to start. It’s an easy read with practical tips and you can always go back to it as a refresher!
While Glover is definitely an advocate for boundaries she also makes space for the idea that relationships may require some flexibility and reminds us that we’re all human and we will make mistakes. “Imperfect relationships are not failures. They are testaments to the value of our connections.”
At the end of each chapter she provides reflective questions that asks us to be curious about ourselves, our feelings and how we might be showing up in our relationships.
“Avoiding discomfort will keep you stuck in the same situation that you’d like to change.” If you’re feeling stuck in some of your relationships this books is great place to start. It’s an easy read with practical tips and you can always go back to it as a refresher!
May 20, 2026
Some of us love to read raunchy books with thugged out MMCs... AND DO!
But please know ya girl is an avid reader lol so I also read things like this.
The Balancing Act explores creating healthy relationships without losing yourself in the process. The way Nedra Glover Tawwab breaks down needs, boundaries, open communication and how the past shows up in our current bonds gave me so much to reflect on.
The quote that stuck with me the most is "Do not confuse what you didn't get as a child with what you don't need as an adult."
I saw myself in so many of the scenarios. Disconnecting. Feeling uncomfortable asking for help. Fear of vulnerability. High functioning while battling mental health issues. Fiercely independent as a coping mechanism. Seeing it all laid out was eye opening even when I already knew.
The author also emphasizes that a diagnosis is not a reflection of who you are or whether you can improve. That matters more than people realize.
Required reading for anyone struggling to create connections and find peace in doing
But please know ya girl is an avid reader lol so I also read things like this.
The Balancing Act explores creating healthy relationships without losing yourself in the process. The way Nedra Glover Tawwab breaks down needs, boundaries, open communication and how the past shows up in our current bonds gave me so much to reflect on.
The quote that stuck with me the most is "Do not confuse what you didn't get as a child with what you don't need as an adult."
I saw myself in so many of the scenarios. Disconnecting. Feeling uncomfortable asking for help. Fear of vulnerability. High functioning while battling mental health issues. Fiercely independent as a coping mechanism. Seeing it all laid out was eye opening even when I already knew.
The author also emphasizes that a diagnosis is not a reflection of who you are or whether you can improve. That matters more than people realize.
Required reading for anyone struggling to create connections and find peace in doing
June 5, 2026
Nedra Glover Tawwab is an American therapist and author; I previously read her 2021 book on boundary-setting, Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself. Her 2026 book The Balancing Act focuses on healthy and less healthy attachment styles in relationships, whether familial, romantic, friendship, or otherwise. This was an interesting read, though I respectfully disagree with many of the points (as I lean more toward avoidant, introverted tendencies myself).
Further reading:
The Social Paradox: Autonomy, Connection, and Why We Need Both to Find Happiness by William von Hippel
My statistics:
Book 83 for 2026
Book 2389 cumulatively
Further reading:
The Social Paradox: Autonomy, Connection, and Why We Need Both to Find Happiness by William von Hippel
My statistics:
Book 83 for 2026
Book 2389 cumulatively
July 13, 2026
More advice from the successful AND practical therapist about how to forge connections that are healthy and beneficial—though she warns that just because you want a particular relationship with someone doesn't mean that person is going to behave as you wish they would. The author has been a social worker and has worked with kids who are in the juvenile justice system, and her compassion for people who have been underparented really shines through. There's advice here on figuring out whether (or when) to expose yourself to addictive substances, including alcohol, drugs, and technology.
A couple of notes about culture: Glover Tawwab is Black, so she uses examples from TV shows (Living Single and Kenan) that have majority-Black casts and may not be familiar to everyone in North America. Also, she ably narrates the audiobook, and she pronounces "ask" as "aks." This seems normal to me, but I have encountered people who consider "aks" to be wrong, ignorant, or worthy of jokes because it isn't how most White people talk.
A couple of notes about culture: Glover Tawwab is Black, so she uses examples from TV shows (Living Single and Kenan) that have majority-Black casts and may not be familiar to everyone in North America. Also, she ably narrates the audiobook, and she pronounces "ask" as "aks." This seems normal to me, but I have encountered people who consider "aks" to be wrong, ignorant, or worthy of jokes because it isn't how most White people talk.
March 12, 2026
In The Balancing Act Nedra Tawwab explores how to balance connection in different relationships in your life. The book is divided into two sections - understanding unhealthy dependency and finding a healthier balance. In many things we often only hear about the extremes, so it's always good to find that middle ground/balancing act. In looking at relationships, Tawwab explores how our background can shape our current behavior, but people CAN change if they are willing to work on themselves. But there is something in here for anyone. Even if you grew up in a healthy family, there are still things you can learn about yourself or how to interact better with others. Written similarly to her other books with lots of real life examples from Tawwab's own life and her (anonymized) therapy clients. Overall, a solid book with lots of helpful information and tips that could be helpful to anyone in any kind of relationship.
July 21, 2026
My Bible from now on to guide me in healthy relationships. I just wish I had found this book months ago. This book is the therapy I've been looking for. Thanks, Nedra, for writing this manual for balanced relationships.
Having experienced a loss in a treasured friendship, this book allowed me to recognise all the patterns that I have had since childhood and that have threatened my relationships, while also understanding the ones where I have a secure attachment.
"Relationships keep us alive and help us thrive. We exist in community with others"
I found myself in many of the behaviours in most of the examples the author has included in the book. Unhealthy relationships in families or just one traumatic experience can really f*ck up how we behave in our most precious relationships, and it is a LOT of work we have to do to shift those learned behaviours. It is a lifelong process.
Having experienced a loss in a treasured friendship, this book allowed me to recognise all the patterns that I have had since childhood and that have threatened my relationships, while also understanding the ones where I have a secure attachment.
"Relationships keep us alive and help us thrive. We exist in community with others"
I found myself in many of the behaviours in most of the examples the author has included in the book. Unhealthy relationships in families or just one traumatic experience can really f*ck up how we behave in our most precious relationships, and it is a LOT of work we have to do to shift those learned behaviours. It is a lifelong process.
February 10, 2026
Boundaries are meant to keep us connected. [I]mperfect connections still add value to our lives.
Nedra Tawwab's newest book tackles the question of how to stay at home with yourself while balancing all of your other relationships. Using stories from her experience as a therapist and her own life, she guides us through codependency, hyper independence, attachment styles and more while helping us dig deeper with reflection questions at the end of each chapter. I always enjoy that she approaches her work not by looking to help us cut people off, but instead as figuring out how to help us maintain the relationships that we want to keep while not losing ourselves. This is a book to take your time reading through according to where you might need some new perspective in your own life and relationships.
Nedra Tawwab's newest book tackles the question of how to stay at home with yourself while balancing all of your other relationships. Using stories from her experience as a therapist and her own life, she guides us through codependency, hyper independence, attachment styles and more while helping us dig deeper with reflection questions at the end of each chapter. I always enjoy that she approaches her work not by looking to help us cut people off, but instead as figuring out how to help us maintain the relationships that we want to keep while not losing ourselves. This is a book to take your time reading through according to where you might need some new perspective in your own life and relationships.
February 10, 2026
As ever, Nedra's latest book is clear, concise, and to the point, offering practical advice and relatable anecdotes to help us navigate the give and take of relationships of all kinds. It resonates deeply and feels very timely not only in my personal life as I manage changing relationships with both friends and family in my 30s, but also in today's world. We need each other and it's okay to need each other, and we can be intentional about the levels of dependency we create with one another. I hurtled through this book and already feel like I could use a second read. I can see this being a book I turn to time and time again, just like Nedra's previous books, when I need some direct and thoughtful advice for building and sustaining loving, healthy relationships. I received an advance copy of this book and all opinions are my own.
July 27, 2026
This is a pretty decent book on setting boundaries. I was looking for something around these lines and this was one of the suggestions from the internet.
Pretty decent book, talks a lot and lot about relationships, the guilt of saying no, the relationship dynamics, communicating, love language yada yada. I heard this as a audio book, sometimes I couldn't; comprehend the attachment styles the author was discussing. But a pretty smooth book for someone looking to dive deeper into boundaries, what they look like, based on different individual styles. I am going to read/listen to this again, just to get a hang of it. Also, something you should have read in your twenties, but could never comprehend in your twenties. I loved the examples the author gave to drive a point. Highly recommend.
Pretty decent book, talks a lot and lot about relationships, the guilt of saying no, the relationship dynamics, communicating, love language yada yada. I heard this as a audio book, sometimes I couldn't; comprehend the attachment styles the author was discussing. But a pretty smooth book for someone looking to dive deeper into boundaries, what they look like, based on different individual styles. I am going to read/listen to this again, just to get a hang of it. Also, something you should have read in your twenties, but could never comprehend in your twenties. I loved the examples the author gave to drive a point. Highly recommend.
August 8, 2026
What I gathered from the text is that each person has different needs in a friendship and healthy friendships vary in style. People may have a difference in opinion in how much time they want to spend together, what activities they prefer to do, and what makes them feel appreciated. Reflecting on my own friendship styles I think I tend to be hyper independent. I can start relationships without expecting anything but a good laugh in return. I don't want to be a burden or add conflict, so I tend to push down my own needs or friendship concerns. This book helped me realize by allowing myself to be vulnerable and communicate when I need help or feel uneasy in a friendship I can prevent resentment building and form closer relationships.
February 10, 2026
This book is clear, compassionate, and refreshingly easy to read. The language is accessible without feeling watered down, making it especially helpful for readers who don’t have a background in therapy but want straightforward information to improve their relationships. Glover breaks down complex emotional dynamics into practical, understandable insights that feel immediately applicable to real life. Rather than overwhelming the reader, the book feels grounding and empowering. It offers clarity, reassurance, and concrete tools for building healthier boundaries and more balanced connections. A great entry point for anyone seeking personal growth without the intimidation of “therapy speak."
March 9, 2026
I appreciate the effort to build on the classic "Attached" and give more practical examples, however this book did not work for me. The stories were never relatable, be it because they are too USA-centric or too focused on cishet women or families with children. The concrete suggestions are sometimes good, but nothing I had not already learnt from "Attached" or "Beyond Belief".
I also took issue with some parts here and there, such as prompts for conversation which did not feel non-violent communication to me. Tolerable minor issues, but they're enough for me to recommend a more polished alternative instead.
I also took issue with some parts here and there, such as prompts for conversation which did not feel non-violent communication to me. Tolerable minor issues, but they're enough for me to recommend a more polished alternative instead.
July 27, 2026
This book was Interesting and boring at the same time. 🥴😬😂 It was a somewhat boring psychology book, but the author broke down many common scenarios that people, or the people we know, are in and have to deal with. From a psychological standpoint, it was fascinating, and the author did a great job outlining alternate ways that people can handle life situations, even including reflection questions at the end of every chapter. However, the book wasn’t a mystery, comedy, or thriller, so nothing to keep one on the edge. It was just chapter after chapter of different life scenarios and what the author has experienced, seen or heard of in her practice, which made it very dull and boring.
April 29, 2026
I finally finished this book—and I’ll read anything Nedra Glover Tawwab writes.
One of my biggest takeaways was thinking about dependency as a spectrum, with healthy interdependence right in the middle. I also appreciated the reminders that setting and maintaining boundaries isn’t about pushing people away—it’s actually how we protect and sustain our relationships.
The audiobook was especially engaging, with plenty of thoughtful insights and practical takeaways around building and keeping strong boundaries.
One of my biggest takeaways was thinking about dependency as a spectrum, with healthy interdependence right in the middle. I also appreciated the reminders that setting and maintaining boundaries isn’t about pushing people away—it’s actually how we protect and sustain our relationships.
The audiobook was especially engaging, with plenty of thoughtful insights and practical takeaways around building and keeping strong boundaries.
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