It's not you, Taiye, it's me.
I don't know why I feel like none of the characters have enough of a personality to seem human, despite being well stocked with anguished personal histories and appropriate mixes of generic and unique traits (except Olu's Asian American wife Ling, who seems particularly ill-served. Her politely racist father, direct from central casting, is at least spared the indignity of being thought 'cute') But perhaps the viewpoint-shifting and relentless interiority sets the bar impossibly high. With all these deepest darkest hearts on display, Selasi is up against the problem... of only having one heart?
But it's me, it's my fault. When Sadie flares up at her mother I'm disgusted and confused; Selasi's explanation of her resentment adds up, but it doesn't feel right to me. Fola, the mother, is adorable (morally faultless), her thoughts poetically rendered, but still seems to sleepwalk. Kweku, the father, gifted with the most story-space to express himself, is generally similarly somnolent. The elder son Olu, for all his inept emoting, lacks substance. Taiwo and Kehinde, damaged, knitted into each other, are the only characters that seem to really live.
It's also mostly my fault that I struggled with what felt like gender-normativity, mostly. Take Ama, Kweku's second wife, described by Olu as a 'village idiot' and by the magic yogi carpenter character as 'used to being told what to do', by Kweku as 'capable of being satisfied' and also, conclusively, as 'a genius'. Selasi thus makes the case for her, through Kweku and later Fola, as unfairly judged, but crucially doesn't give her a voice: she has no right of reply, no subject position. Maybe it's a good tactic though to make the reader do the work?
I could really have done without the enormous excess of physical descriptions (especially the constant judgemental equivocal adjectives like beautiful and pretty) and I would have been much happier to do without any of the sex scenes. My fault. And the abuse... I always wish these scenes were offstage.
It's my fault that I wanted a different book when this one was perfectly good. People and relationships are mashed up, injured by institutional racism and racism-induced inferiority complexes (I ineptly fill in the gaps as to why Fola, perhaps because she is African, seemingly hasn't prepared her children well to cope with anti-blackness in America). Poverty happens with consequences, but lacks its taste. In general the Sais move freely through the world unhindered by monetary obstacles. Staff near-silently assist them. There is nuance, but the people change painfully, while the structures that hurt them slumber in place. There is sense of place, aesthetic; not political, not communal.
Honestly it's well constructed and beautifully written and all. And I enjoyed reading it, on the whole. I just couldn't fall in love.