What do you think?
Rate this book
Deliria - A Dark Psychological Romance : HARD VERSION
PLEASE NOTE THIS IS THE HARD VERSION. If you are looking for a traditional HEA and don't want to deal with all the pitch black triggers there is a soft version that may be more suitable.
Becoming a Forster is every girl's dream....
Except, I don’t remember marrying Alex.
I don’t remember anything. The woman in the mirror is a stranger.
And now I’m here, in the great Forster Mansion, sequestered away with his family because I’m too ill to be out in public.
But this place feels more like a prison than a sanctuary.
I feel watched, haunted— whether it’s by this house or my own fractured mind, I can’t say.
I don't know who I am. I don't know who I was.
Alex says that I’m sick. That I need to rest. But my mind won’t rest.
There’s something horribly wrong here, something lurking beneath the surface that I can’t grasp.
Can I trust this man who says he loves me? And why does his troubled brother seem to haunt my every step?
As the line between reality and illusion blurs, it’s no longer about who I was. It’s about whether I can survive what I’ve become - what they’ve turned me into.
What to
- Tri- Narration
- Dub con / Non Con
- Somno
- Forced proximity
- Coercive control / Gaslighting / Manipulation
- At it's core, this is a dark gothic romance with a lot of twists and some pitch black triggers
Becoming a Forster is every girl's dream....
Except, I don’t remember marrying Alex.
I don’t remember anything. The woman in the mirror is a stranger.
And now I’m here, in the great Forster Mansion, sequestered away with his family because I’m too ill to be out in public.
But this place feels more like a prison than a sanctuary.
I feel watched, haunted— whether it’s by this house or my own fractured mind, I can’t say.
I don't know who I am. I don't know who I was.
Alex says that I’m sick. That I need to rest. But my mind won’t rest.
There’s something horribly wrong here, something lurking beneath the surface that I can’t grasp.
Can I trust this man who says he loves me? And why does his troubled brother seem to haunt my every step?
As the line between reality and illusion blurs, it’s no longer about who I was. It’s about whether I can survive what I’ve become - what they’ve turned me into.
What to
- Tri- Narration
- Dub con / Non Con
- Somno
- Forced proximity
- Coercive control / Gaslighting / Manipulation
- At it's core, this is a dark gothic romance with a lot of twists and some pitch black triggers
442 pages, Kindle Edition
Published May 31, 2025
About the author
Ellie Sanders
33 books672 followersInternational bestselling author of Pitch Black Romance.
Ellie Sanders lives in rural Hampshire, in the U.K. with her partner and two troublesome dogs.
She has a BA Hons degree in English and American Literature with Creative Writing and enjoys spending her time, when not endlessly writing, exploring the countryside around her home.
Hit her up on her the following accounts.....
FB Group: The Hot Steamy Writer
Instagram: @hotsteamywriter
TikTok: @hotsteamywriter
Twitter: @hotsteamywriter
Ellie Sanders lives in rural Hampshire, in the U.K. with her partner and two troublesome dogs.
She has a BA Hons degree in English and American Literature with Creative Writing and enjoys spending her time, when not endlessly writing, exploring the countryside around her home.
Hit her up on her the following accounts.....
FB Group: The Hot Steamy Writer
Instagram: @hotsteamywriter
TikTok: @hotsteamywriter
Twitter: @hotsteamywriter
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 48 reviews
December 26, 2025
But why?
It was a good mind fuck of a book , kind of. Would have been even better if there was a explanation as to why all the shit was happening.
It was a good mind fuck of a book , kind of. Would have been even better if there was a explanation as to why all the shit was happening.
May 31, 2026
This is the definition of dark horror erotica in a book for me! These types of books are really are hard to come by that actually have a plot. So well done to the author! It was harsh, raw, and tragic. The MFC is a bada** who is strong and determined! You’ll find yourself rooting for her the whole time!
I will say some of the time line was kind of confusing to follow. Like how did she end up where she did? I wish there would have been more building in the beginning.
Also this is a no HEA and I will say that ending threw me for a loop. I was crying screaming and in shock at the end! Also another reason why I loved it! Emotional damage is my type of book!
I will say some of the time line was kind of confusing to follow. Like how did she end up where she did? I wish there would have been more building in the beginning.
Also this is a no HEA and I will say that ending threw me for a loop. I was crying screaming and in shock at the end! Also another reason why I loved it! Emotional damage is my type of book!
March 2, 2026
3.5 maybe a 4.
I’m not sure this was hard for me to figure out.
I did enjoy the idea of the book. Like the ideas of the family and forcing amnesia basically was interesting. I was a little confused on the reasoning why. I felt the reasons sort of fell flat. Like I almost needed more information on the why and the how. And more info on the brother and that how as well.
We did get brief moments of that but it wasn’t enough for me personally.
The book itself was a mindfuck and the husband and father were vile. And the mother. But truthfully I was left a tad confused and wanting.
The ending I both loved and hated. The romantic side of me loved it. The logical side hated it. All in all though I’d still recommend this one if you enjoy pitch black plots and this authors other books. As it was very on brand!
I’m not sure this was hard for me to figure out.
I did enjoy the idea of the book. Like the ideas of the family and forcing amnesia basically was interesting. I was a little confused on the reasoning why. I felt the reasons sort of fell flat. Like I almost needed more information on the why and the how. And more info on the brother and that how as well.
We did get brief moments of that but it wasn’t enough for me personally.
The book itself was a mindfuck and the husband and father were vile. And the mother. But truthfully I was left a tad confused and wanting.
The ending I both loved and hated. The romantic side of me loved it. The logical side hated it. All in all though I’d still recommend this one if you enjoy pitch black plots and this authors other books. As it was very on brand!
June 7, 2026
DELIRIA BY ELLIE SANDERS
HARD VERSION
5 ✨ ✨ ✨ ✨ ✨s.
JEEZ. This book was rough to read and so dark.
Please always check your triggers before reading
HARD VERSION
5 ✨ ✨ ✨ ✨ ✨s.
JEEZ. This book was rough to read and so dark.
Please always check your triggers before reading
February 3, 2026
How are we just dropped into the story like that without any explanation, then the FMC is graped twice without explanation.. it’s been a while I dnfed a book so fast. I mean I was warned that it would be dark but this one was dark with no explanation. We were just thrown into all that drama with no way to understand. Naaah. Not for me
March 15, 2026
Firstly, this book got my mind going! I was trying to figure out if the FMC was genuinely insane and imagining the things her husband and father in law put her through of if they really were that awful…plot twist they really are that awful.
Now I really enjoyed this book-I feel it was made very clear why the husband and father in law were doing what they were doing…it was about money and power.
As per Ellie’s books this hard version is dark an I definitely feel triggers need to be at least glanced at if you have anything you may be against reading because this book touches on so much and shows a lot of trauma and abuse in many different ways.
I adore rafe. Absolutely adore him and the ending tore my heart in two I shed a good few tears that’s for sure and I wasn’t expecting the ending to be how it was!
5 stars for me without a doubt
Now I really enjoyed this book-I feel it was made very clear why the husband and father in law were doing what they were doing…it was about money and power.
As per Ellie’s books this hard version is dark an I definitely feel triggers need to be at least glanced at if you have anything you may be against reading because this book touches on so much and shows a lot of trauma and abuse in many different ways.
I adore rafe. Absolutely adore him and the ending tore my heart in two I shed a good few tears that’s for sure and I wasn’t expecting the ending to be how it was!
5 stars for me without a doubt
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
August 17, 2025
There are countless trigger warnings, I stopped reading them halfway through, don't do this if you have any raw spots. Mine is miscarrying and due to my haste I was unprepared. Take your time reading through that list and make an informed choice for/against this book.
As for the story itself:
• multiple POVs rarely work for me, I like suspense, being very well-informed from all sides all the time kills the suspense; just when I started pondering whether she had gone mad after losing her brother, Alexander gets a chapter and the jig's up, I didn't see the appeal
• I get that drugs affect the memory, but in this book it was completely random, sometimes there was no drugging mentioned yet she couldn't remember the next morning, other times she was drugged and could, some days she remembered stuff easily, at other times she had forgotten even more, like where she was or that she was married, it felt less and less convincing and more convenient
• I like someone who fights back, but with her barely eating or hydrating, being drugged heavily and the stuff being done to her physically everyday, a real human would not be able to do so after months, especially the last chapters were proposterous even counting in the adrenaline factor
• the plot didn't really make sense; first of all, because she just could have gone into hiding and wait for the banks to foreclose on the heavily indebted players, or could have alerted the authorities to the embezzlement, 200 missing millions are hard to explain, but lets say for the sake of the argument, that she needs to take the route she has: while the Forsters have to wait for her 25th birthday, she does not, she could just kill them all in their sleep, wait for her inheritance and use it find out where Sydney&Fraser are hiding, especially given that their presence at the mansion was under no circumstance a given but merely a possibility, great parenting decision on Lionel's part to sacrifice his daughter for a 50/50 chance at avenging his wife, bet his wife would have approved... NOT.
• what's the text message to her father about? it's not as if she had set anything in motion while being there, all she did was trying to regain enough of her brain to even understand what was going on; they had a plan at some point (though the reader's not filled in on it) that fell apart when Rafferty informed her, that Alex knew who she was, she panicked, called her brother to get her out, then the accident happened, as of then, there is no plan, nothing any of them actively do
• "the plan" is a sick joke, she lives hell on earth for half a year and the great finale is ONE MAN showing up? Pair that with her interrupting Rafe giving Alexander what he had coming, thus enabling the latter to get away, if I had read a paperback instead of on my kindle, the book would have hit the wall right then and there
• Rafe fighting with mommy over a gun, being twice her size and about 25 years younger, are you kidding me? You need a gun for that?
• Scarlett, in the sad physical state she is in, goes after Alex both alone and unarmed, great choice, Rafe then follows once he accomplished the unexplicably impossible task to deal with his mother, leaving Lionel ALONE in a house full of goons (where did they suddenly come from? Alex never had goons before) and the security detail the guests brought onto the island, is he supposed to be an immortal?
• ending was a happy one in my eyes, but that certainly lies in the eye of the beholder, I read the "soft" ending, too, and found her father's audacity to try and tell her what was best for her after whoring her out for his idea of revenge, infuriating and the happy ending something for readers naive enough to believe that after using the word "trauma" on every other page, there are no longterm repercussions of what she endured, so not believable
Overall, the story simply lacked finesse. I like my bad guys twisting the truth/reality, like a white car appearing red in the glow of a street lamp at night, or one of these pictures where you either see the vase or the two faces, you know, you don't share their approach or conclusion, but their reasoning makes sense somehow, but here they're just utterly delusional, like when Alex complains about the drugged MC not taking good enough care of her appearence *eyeroll
Nehavior doesn't fit with the character, like Alexander restricting access "because she is my wife", when he never had any interest beyond her being the Heath-heiress (the flashback to their "wedding ceremony" makes that abundantly clear), him letting her almost kill herself in a drugged state numerous times because he's too lazy to go outside and bring her back in, apparently 200 million are not motivation enough for him; or the Forsters keeping Rafferty around for literally no reason; Scarlett pretending being violated the same way her mother was by the same men no less is revenge? Pretty sure the men in question would disagree.
Writing is okay, content not great, I kept reading for the big plan to unfold and am seriously let down, I was waiting for them to turn the tables, make the bad guys suffer, but everyone got a very quick death, too, which again poses the question: why not simply kill them in their sleep?
Given that the author claims "extensive editing", there's a surprising amount of mistakes and contrary to her claim, not a question of AE or BE. Plural s has no apostrophe, preverbal and proverbial is not the same, there are words missing or too many, ... That professional editor did not do a convincing enough job.
As for the story itself:
• multiple POVs rarely work for me, I like suspense, being very well-informed from all sides all the time kills the suspense; just when I started pondering whether she had gone mad after losing her brother, Alexander gets a chapter and the jig's up, I didn't see the appeal
• I get that drugs affect the memory, but in this book it was completely random, sometimes there was no drugging mentioned yet she couldn't remember the next morning, other times she was drugged and could, some days she remembered stuff easily, at other times she had forgotten even more, like where she was or that she was married, it felt less and less convincing and more convenient
• I like someone who fights back, but with her barely eating or hydrating, being drugged heavily and the stuff being done to her physically everyday, a real human would not be able to do so after months, especially the last chapters were proposterous even counting in the adrenaline factor
• the plot didn't really make sense; first of all, because she just could have gone into hiding and wait for the banks to foreclose on the heavily indebted players, or could have alerted the authorities to the embezzlement, 200 missing millions are hard to explain, but lets say for the sake of the argument, that she needs to take the route she has: while the Forsters have to wait for her 25th birthday, she does not, she could just kill them all in their sleep, wait for her inheritance and use it find out where Sydney&Fraser are hiding, especially given that their presence at the mansion was under no circumstance a given but merely a possibility, great parenting decision on Lionel's part to sacrifice his daughter for a 50/50 chance at avenging his wife, bet his wife would have approved... NOT.
• what's the text message to her father about? it's not as if she had set anything in motion while being there, all she did was trying to regain enough of her brain to even understand what was going on; they had a plan at some point (though the reader's not filled in on it) that fell apart when Rafferty informed her, that Alex knew who she was, she panicked, called her brother to get her out, then the accident happened, as of then, there is no plan, nothing any of them actively do
• "the plan" is a sick joke, she lives hell on earth for half a year and the great finale is ONE MAN showing up? Pair that with her interrupting Rafe giving Alexander what he had coming, thus enabling the latter to get away, if I had read a paperback instead of on my kindle, the book would have hit the wall right then and there
• Rafe fighting with mommy over a gun, being twice her size and about 25 years younger, are you kidding me? You need a gun for that?
• Scarlett, in the sad physical state she is in, goes after Alex both alone and unarmed, great choice, Rafe then follows once he accomplished the unexplicably impossible task to deal with his mother, leaving Lionel ALONE in a house full of goons (where did they suddenly come from? Alex never had goons before) and the security detail the guests brought onto the island, is he supposed to be an immortal?
• ending was a happy one in my eyes, but that certainly lies in the eye of the beholder, I read the "soft" ending, too, and found her father's audacity to try and tell her what was best for her after whoring her out for his idea of revenge, infuriating and the happy ending something for readers naive enough to believe that after using the word "trauma" on every other page, there are no longterm repercussions of what she endured, so not believable
Overall, the story simply lacked finesse. I like my bad guys twisting the truth/reality, like a white car appearing red in the glow of a street lamp at night, or one of these pictures where you either see the vase or the two faces, you know, you don't share their approach or conclusion, but their reasoning makes sense somehow, but here they're just utterly delusional, like when Alex complains about the drugged MC not taking good enough care of her appearence *eyeroll
Nehavior doesn't fit with the character, like Alexander restricting access "because she is my wife", when he never had any interest beyond her being the Heath-heiress (the flashback to their "wedding ceremony" makes that abundantly clear), him letting her almost kill herself in a drugged state numerous times because he's too lazy to go outside and bring her back in, apparently 200 million are not motivation enough for him; or the Forsters keeping Rafferty around for literally no reason; Scarlett pretending being violated the same way her mother was by the same men no less is revenge? Pretty sure the men in question would disagree.
Writing is okay, content not great, I kept reading for the big plan to unfold and am seriously let down, I was waiting for them to turn the tables, make the bad guys suffer, but everyone got a very quick death, too, which again poses the question: why not simply kill them in their sleep?
Given that the author claims "extensive editing", there's a surprising amount of mistakes and contrary to her claim, not a question of AE or BE. Plural s has no apostrophe, preverbal and proverbial is not the same, there are words missing or too many, ... That professional editor did not do a convincing enough job.
November 2, 2025
I've read both versions of this book and they do differ, the hard version is more graphic, more disturbing, more tragic and some would say there is no HEA in this one but I would argue that actually there is in a way. If you want a happier, traditional ending and less brutality then read the softer one.
And this is a brutal, violent black romance, make no mistake. There are no heroes in this story, just the villains, and the morally ambiguous/ grey characters. This centres around Scarlett, a young woman who was bady injured in a car accident that killed her brother and is now recovering at the wealthy Forster family mansion on a isolated island, cut off by the sea.
She's married to Alex, the older son, but each day she wakes up weak, confused, with memory loss. She cant remember things, and even though she is tended to, and apparently cared for she cant help but feel something is wrong, that she is in terrible danger.
Alex is always watching her, checking up on her, she feels eyes on her all the time. But is her paranoia and fear justified or is it a result of her brain injury. She overhears snippets of conversations between Alex and his parents that are concerning, and its not long until Alex is forcing himself on her and sharing her with his father. She knows she needs to remember and escape but how, when its clear the family and entire staff are determined to hold her prisoner.
She starts finding little notes she's left for herself previously, which give her clues and she starts writing down what is happening to her in an old library book, and starts, bit by bit to piece together what is happening and why she is there. But is there anyone she can trust, is Rafe, her husband's younger brother friend or foe, and will she work out exactly what the Forster family are up to before its too late?
I enjoyed it its well written, the atmosphere of creeping dread and confusion is very well done. Scarlett's mental state is well described and the abuse and degradation she endures are truly stomach churning. Please note the TW's at the start, this is a black story, its not a romance, although she does have feelings for someone. There is physical, mental abuse and rape and a whole lot more so be warned.
Scarlett is such a strong FMC, you will be amazed at what she goes through and survives. I've read both versions and cant say which one I preferred. They are both equally good, and two very different endings.
And this is a brutal, violent black romance, make no mistake. There are no heroes in this story, just the villains, and the morally ambiguous/ grey characters. This centres around Scarlett, a young woman who was bady injured in a car accident that killed her brother and is now recovering at the wealthy Forster family mansion on a isolated island, cut off by the sea.
She's married to Alex, the older son, but each day she wakes up weak, confused, with memory loss. She cant remember things, and even though she is tended to, and apparently cared for she cant help but feel something is wrong, that she is in terrible danger.
Alex is always watching her, checking up on her, she feels eyes on her all the time. But is her paranoia and fear justified or is it a result of her brain injury. She overhears snippets of conversations between Alex and his parents that are concerning, and its not long until Alex is forcing himself on her and sharing her with his father. She knows she needs to remember and escape but how, when its clear the family and entire staff are determined to hold her prisoner.
She starts finding little notes she's left for herself previously, which give her clues and she starts writing down what is happening to her in an old library book, and starts, bit by bit to piece together what is happening and why she is there. But is there anyone she can trust, is Rafe, her husband's younger brother friend or foe, and will she work out exactly what the Forster family are up to before its too late?
I enjoyed it its well written, the atmosphere of creeping dread and confusion is very well done. Scarlett's mental state is well described and the abuse and degradation she endures are truly stomach churning. Please note the TW's at the start, this is a black story, its not a romance, although she does have feelings for someone. There is physical, mental abuse and rape and a whole lot more so be warned.
Scarlett is such a strong FMC, you will be amazed at what she goes through and survives. I've read both versions and cant say which one I preferred. They are both equally good, and two very different endings.
March 20, 2026
The first 200 pages I thought, ok this is brilliant, I've finally found a dark romance with an actual plot!! I was totally hooked! Why was Scarlett there, being subjected to this horrific abuse! I didn't know. She didn't know either, with little snippets of memory appearing through flashbacks. I had to know!! I totally devoured this, the plot, the writing, the characters, everything was so engaging!
And then the ending! I want to do this without spoilers - if you are in that situation that Scarlett is, and are offered numerous opportunities to get out, and choose not to take them, because you are a total bad-ass, a one woman vengeance machine that WILL triumph no matter what, fair enough! I'm with you babe! But then each and every time you go back in, you are immediately overwhelmed and think 'Oh my god, this is so much worse than I ever thought possible, I'm being totally broken, I want to die...' then you kind of mis-read that didn't you! And then you do it again. And again. Until as the reader you eventually think 'Have you learned nothing?'
But the whole way through she perseveres, because of her secret master plan to eventually win. As you're reading you're thinking ok, what is it, you have a private army to come in and destroy everyone and save you? Mercs? Iron Man? And then you finally find out and you're like... seriously? That was your plan??? It is so underwhelmingly daft, it's hard to describe.
Plus it is never fully described why Scarlett has to keep lasting until the date of her 'vengeance'. We know why from the point of view of her captors, but for her? She could have just ended it at any point, and said 'Ha, I win!', but no apparently she can't. Who knows why.
And the final comeuppance - you're reading all the way through thinking this guy needs to suffer for what he is doing to her, hopefully she will turn the tables, capture him, and exact her revenge, slowly and in full measure. Not just oh he's dead. I think.
It was still a brilliant book, and beautifully written, Ellie Sanders has real talent for story telling, creating suspense, and really gripping the reader, I wish I could write like that, but I just wish the ending had been worthy of the rest of the book. Still, read it and see if you agree with me.
And then the ending! I want to do this without spoilers - if you are in that situation that Scarlett is, and are offered numerous opportunities to get out, and choose not to take them, because you are a total bad-ass, a one woman vengeance machine that WILL triumph no matter what, fair enough! I'm with you babe! But then each and every time you go back in, you are immediately overwhelmed and think 'Oh my god, this is so much worse than I ever thought possible, I'm being totally broken, I want to die...' then you kind of mis-read that didn't you! And then you do it again. And again. Until as the reader you eventually think 'Have you learned nothing?'
But the whole way through she perseveres, because of her secret master plan to eventually win. As you're reading you're thinking ok, what is it, you have a private army to come in and destroy everyone and save you? Mercs? Iron Man? And then you finally find out and you're like... seriously? That was your plan??? It is so underwhelmingly daft, it's hard to describe.
Plus it is never fully described why Scarlett has to keep lasting until the date of her 'vengeance'. We know why from the point of view of her captors, but for her? She could have just ended it at any point, and said 'Ha, I win!', but no apparently she can't. Who knows why.
And the final comeuppance - you're reading all the way through thinking this guy needs to suffer for what he is doing to her, hopefully she will turn the tables, capture him, and exact her revenge, slowly and in full measure. Not just oh he's dead. I think.
It was still a brilliant book, and beautifully written, Ellie Sanders has real talent for story telling, creating suspense, and really gripping the reader, I wish I could write like that, but I just wish the ending had been worthy of the rest of the book. Still, read it and see if you agree with me.
August 12, 2025
When I saw Deliria had a hard version (with many many trigger warnings, lol!), my interest was piqued!
I've never before read a book with so many (on-page) brutal rapes! That's for sure! 😆
The suspense of Scarlett's ultimate reasoning for (voluntarily!!) allowing herself to be abused, drugged, and be brutally (gang) raped on a daily basis... for months on end, was what kept me reading. Slowly (sometimes, for me, really too slowly), the whole story unfolded. In the end I wasn't really impressed.
What Scarlett had to endure was absolutely out of proportion to her ultimate goal. TBH, it was actually totally unbelievable! Of course I know I have to take everything I read with a pinch of salt, but this really went above and beyond. Come on... there had to be much better and quicker solutions to get her revenge?? 😉
So... all and all, an interesting read, but with very mixed feelings.
That I had to keep reading, even though the story didn't really captivate me... (I know, that may sound weird!), is something not many writers can pull off. 😉 But does that ultimately make up for the fact that the story remained very... meh?? I still have no idea... 🤔😂
Loved the ending, though.
Ellie Sanders was a new-2-me-author!
I've never before read a book with so many (on-page) brutal rapes! That's for sure! 😆
The suspense of Scarlett's ultimate reasoning for (voluntarily!!) allowing herself to be abused, drugged, and be brutally (gang) raped on a daily basis... for months on end, was what kept me reading. Slowly (sometimes, for me, really too slowly), the whole story unfolded. In the end I wasn't really impressed.
What Scarlett had to endure was absolutely out of proportion to her ultimate goal. TBH, it was actually totally unbelievable! Of course I know I have to take everything I read with a pinch of salt, but this really went above and beyond. Come on... there had to be much better and quicker solutions to get her revenge?? 😉
So... all and all, an interesting read, but with very mixed feelings.
That I had to keep reading, even though the story didn't really captivate me... (I know, that may sound weird!), is something not many writers can pull off. 😉 But does that ultimately make up for the fact that the story remained very... meh?? I still have no idea... 🤔😂
Loved the ending, though.
Ellie Sanders was a new-2-me-author!
May 6, 2026
Unapologetically Pitch Black
Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Spice: 5/5 🔥 (Extreme/Explicit)
If you are looking for a standard "dark romance" where the villain eventually softens or redeems himself, this is not that book. This is the "Hard Version" for a reason, and it is easily one of the most visceral, pitch-black reads I’ve encountered.
The Darkness: The "bad guy" stays a bad guy until the very end. There is no magical transformation or hidden heart of gold. The plot is a cold, calculated scheme of financial predation and systemic abuse. The level of depravity—specifically the coordinated assaults between the protagonist and his father—is extreme.
The Spice: The non-con scenes are incredibly explicit and intense. Because the book is written with such a focus on the FMC's internal thoughts and feelings as things are happening, you are right there in the scene. It’s raw, it’s "hot" in that transgressive way, and it doesn't shy away from the most severe triggers (drugged non-con, fisting, and anal rape).
The Ending: There is no HEA (Happily Ever After). The conclusion is as bleak as the rest of the book—a final, desperate struggle that ends in tragedy rather than a sunset. It felt honest to the level of trauma established throughout the story.
Final Verdict: For fans of authors like Alaska Angelini or R. Lee Smith who want a story that actually stays in the "Pitch Black" lane without flinching, this is a must-read. It’s dark, it’s explicit, and it’s haunting.
Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Spice: 5/5 🔥 (Extreme/Explicit)
If you are looking for a standard "dark romance" where the villain eventually softens or redeems himself, this is not that book. This is the "Hard Version" for a reason, and it is easily one of the most visceral, pitch-black reads I’ve encountered.
The Darkness: The "bad guy" stays a bad guy until the very end. There is no magical transformation or hidden heart of gold. The plot is a cold, calculated scheme of financial predation and systemic abuse. The level of depravity—specifically the coordinated assaults between the protagonist and his father—is extreme.
The Spice: The non-con scenes are incredibly explicit and intense. Because the book is written with such a focus on the FMC's internal thoughts and feelings as things are happening, you are right there in the scene. It’s raw, it’s "hot" in that transgressive way, and it doesn't shy away from the most severe triggers (drugged non-con, fisting, and anal rape).
The Ending: There is no HEA (Happily Ever After). The conclusion is as bleak as the rest of the book—a final, desperate struggle that ends in tragedy rather than a sunset. It felt honest to the level of trauma established throughout the story.
Final Verdict: For fans of authors like Alaska Angelini or R. Lee Smith who want a story that actually stays in the "Pitch Black" lane without flinching, this is a must-read. It’s dark, it’s explicit, and it’s haunting.
June 11, 2026
This book comes in a ‘soft’ and a ‘hard’ edition but in Ellie’s own words both are messed up and dark! The soft edition has a traditional HEA the dark not so much so..
I read the dark edition and loved it. I then skim read soft edition and read the ending as I wanted to know the alternative ending and I loved that too. From what I can tell the story is the same but ‘darker’ edition the key moments are darker- and there is no happy ever after ending. I preferred the darker version, of course 🤣 but I think I might prefer the ending of the soft edition 🙄. So now ofc I need both copies for my trophy shelf 🤣🖤.
Dark! So defo not for the faint hearted, check your triggers..
I have been in a reading slump but this defo got me out of it, I was hooked from the start. It was fast paced and keeps you intrigued throughout. I love the FMC Scarlett- when she is herself boy is a strong, fiesty little thing! A force to be reconned with. Her husband, MMC of the book is not loveable, not even likable! He is none redeemable- evil and twisted like the rest of his family! Except for his brother Rafe, another MMC in this book who as the book went on I found myself going from disliking to loving!
An emotional rollercoaster. If you want a dark, deprived, tragic, devastatingly perfect book. This one may just be for you 🖤
I read the dark edition and loved it. I then skim read soft edition and read the ending as I wanted to know the alternative ending and I loved that too. From what I can tell the story is the same but ‘darker’ edition the key moments are darker- and there is no happy ever after ending. I preferred the darker version, of course 🤣 but I think I might prefer the ending of the soft edition 🙄. So now ofc I need both copies for my trophy shelf 🤣🖤.
Dark! So defo not for the faint hearted, check your triggers..
I have been in a reading slump but this defo got me out of it, I was hooked from the start. It was fast paced and keeps you intrigued throughout. I love the FMC Scarlett- when she is herself boy is a strong, fiesty little thing! A force to be reconned with. Her husband, MMC of the book is not loveable, not even likable! He is none redeemable- evil and twisted like the rest of his family! Except for his brother Rafe, another MMC in this book who as the book went on I found myself going from disliking to loving!
An emotional rollercoaster. If you want a dark, deprived, tragic, devastatingly perfect book. This one may just be for you 🖤
February 2, 2026
okay...spoilers
A jumbled mess of revenge against a family, innocence in this supposed crime doesn't matter, wrapped up in a plethora of grapes and purposeful mental manipulation, all because of money that was "stolen" from a family who doesn't seem to be hurting by this supposed theft. At. All. I understand it can be a matter of pride but the reasoning for all of this is weak for the lengths Alexander, Vincent, and his mother go to in order to exact this "revenge."
Especially because they thought the father was dead. So, it makes no sense to me. If they were waiting for her 25th birthday, they had enough money to kill her, keep her on ice, and then discover a conveniently expired Scarlett after her birthday. Or just locked her away without all the effort of drugging and gaslighting and been their horrible selves while she was conscious of the fact.
I guess with all the connivance and effort being put into this scheme that she the reasoning was revealed it fell flat and took away from the parts of the story I thought were brilliant.
A jumbled mess of revenge against a family, innocence in this supposed crime doesn't matter, wrapped up in a plethora of grapes and purposeful mental manipulation, all because of money that was "stolen" from a family who doesn't seem to be hurting by this supposed theft. At. All. I understand it can be a matter of pride but the reasoning for all of this is weak for the lengths Alexander, Vincent, and his mother go to in order to exact this "revenge."
Especially because they thought the father was dead. So, it makes no sense to me. If they were waiting for her 25th birthday, they had enough money to kill her, keep her on ice, and then discover a conveniently expired Scarlett after her birthday. Or just locked her away without all the effort of drugging and gaslighting and been their horrible selves while she was conscious of the fact.
I guess with all the connivance and effort being put into this scheme that she the reasoning was revealed it fell flat and took away from the parts of the story I thought were brilliant.
February 15, 2026
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
I don’t even know where to start…
I fucking loved this book. Honestly? Six stars. No hesitation.
The writing was incredible, immersive, emotional, and completely consuming. This story doesn’t just unfold… it pulls you down with the FMC, blurring the line between what’s real and what isn’t. I was constantly questioning everything, trying to figure out who was who and where the truth actually lived.
And that ending… tragic, devastating, and somehow perfect.
You care so deeply about the FMC that anything softer would have felt wrong. It hurt in exactly the way the story needed it to, and I genuinely don’t think any other ending would have worked.
This was such a powerful, unforgettable ride and easily one of my favourite reads of the year.
I will be recommending this book forever. No notes. Just obsession.
I don’t even know where to start…
I fucking loved this book. Honestly? Six stars. No hesitation.
The writing was incredible, immersive, emotional, and completely consuming. This story doesn’t just unfold… it pulls you down with the FMC, blurring the line between what’s real and what isn’t. I was constantly questioning everything, trying to figure out who was who and where the truth actually lived.
And that ending… tragic, devastating, and somehow perfect.
You care so deeply about the FMC that anything softer would have felt wrong. It hurt in exactly the way the story needed it to, and I genuinely don’t think any other ending would have worked.
This was such a powerful, unforgettable ride and easily one of my favourite reads of the year.
I will be recommending this book forever. No notes. Just obsession.
February 26, 2026
I absolutely loved the harshness of this book. It’s honestly harder than you’d think to find great horror erotica romance, and this one delivered. It is very dark horror, heavy, unsettling, and not for the faint of heart. Check your triggers.
I loved the plot line and the constant feeling that something was deeply wrong. The mansion setting, the fractured memory, the paranoia, it all created such a suffocating atmosphere. The romance aspect and horror blended in a way that felt intense and disturbing in the best way.
My only slight critique is that the ending felt a bit rushed after so much of the book lingered in that slow, oppressive tension. I wanted just a little more time with the fallout. Still, this was such a strong read for me. I will absolutely be reading more from this author and recommending it to my fellow readers who love their romance very dark and in the horror genre!
I loved the plot line and the constant feeling that something was deeply wrong. The mansion setting, the fractured memory, the paranoia, it all created such a suffocating atmosphere. The romance aspect and horror blended in a way that felt intense and disturbing in the best way.
My only slight critique is that the ending felt a bit rushed after so much of the book lingered in that slow, oppressive tension. I wanted just a little more time with the fallout. Still, this was such a strong read for me. I will absolutely be reading more from this author and recommending it to my fellow readers who love their romance very dark and in the horror genre!
July 15, 2026
⭐⭐⭐✨ (3.5)
Alex & Vincent: You diabolical pieces of TRASH. Hate isn't a strong enough word to describe how I feel about you two disgusting human beings 🔫
Rafe: You promised she'd never be alone... and then you kept that promise in the most heartbreaking way possible 💔
Scarlett: Damn, girl... no one deserves what you endured. I'm just glad you got your vengeance 🗡️
As for literally everything else... 🤨
This book ended, but my questions did not.
I kept waiting for that magical ’OHHHHHH, now it all makes sense!’ moment. A few things clicked, sure... but I still closed the book feeling like someone owed me a flowchart.
Show me the conspiracy board with ALL the red string… not half snipped pieces dangling in random directions.
3.5 stars. The characters broke my heart but the plot broke my brain 😆
Alex & Vincent: You diabolical pieces of TRASH. Hate isn't a strong enough word to describe how I feel about you two disgusting human beings 🔫
Rafe: You promised she'd never be alone... and then you kept that promise in the most heartbreaking way possible 💔
Scarlett: Damn, girl... no one deserves what you endured. I'm just glad you got your vengeance 🗡️
As for literally everything else... 🤨
This book ended, but my questions did not.
I kept waiting for that magical ’OHHHHHH, now it all makes sense!’ moment. A few things clicked, sure... but I still closed the book feeling like someone owed me a flowchart.
Show me the conspiracy board with ALL the red string… not half snipped pieces dangling in random directions.
3.5 stars. The characters broke my heart but the plot broke my brain 😆
August 4, 2026
Deliria is not for the faint of heart. This is a pitch-black read that absolutely demands you check the trigger warnings before diving in.
From the very first page, I was thrown into a whirlwind of secrets, twists, and emotional chaos. Every time I thought I had something figured out, another revelation completely changed everything. The suspense kept building, and I couldn’t stop turning the pages.
This book took me on a roller coaster of emotions—confusion, heartbreak, shock, and hope—all wrapped up in a dark, gripping story that refused to let go. If you enjoy psychological, emotionally intense reads with shocking secrets and don’t mind venturing into the darkest corners, this one is worth picking up.
Just be prepared… this story will stay with you long after you finish the last page.
From the very first page, I was thrown into a whirlwind of secrets, twists, and emotional chaos. Every time I thought I had something figured out, another revelation completely changed everything. The suspense kept building, and I couldn’t stop turning the pages.
This book took me on a roller coaster of emotions—confusion, heartbreak, shock, and hope—all wrapped up in a dark, gripping story that refused to let go. If you enjoy psychological, emotionally intense reads with shocking secrets and don’t mind venturing into the darkest corners, this one is worth picking up.
Just be prepared… this story will stay with you long after you finish the last page.
December 2, 2025
….wow…. The first half of this story reminded me of the book Rebecca. The creepy, gothic, feverish dream vibes; except SATURATED with non/con and evil forced sharing. What’s real? Who’s the crazy one? Who’s evil? Loved when I finally got to read some female rage fight back scenes! The second half was like evil Romeo and Juliet. I wish we could have had a stronger motive or less opportune moments for her character to get out of the predicament. I get wanting to avenge family but to willingly put herself through what she did, didn’t align for me. Same with her father going along with it… I don’t understand her willingness to sacrifice herself when she had love to fight for… she wasn’t a suicidal character.
December 28, 2025
This one hurt.
I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to read this book. I had seen this when only the “soft” version was out. I have yet to read that one, so I went in completely blind. This was definitely a hard read, but boy does Ellie Sanders know how to make us feel everything her characters do!
This book completely wrecked me, but now I have to go read the soft version!
Definitely makes it to one of my top 10 reads for 2025!
I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to read this book. I had seen this when only the “soft” version was out. I have yet to read that one, so I went in completely blind. This was definitely a hard read, but boy does Ellie Sanders know how to make us feel everything her characters do!
This book completely wrecked me, but now I have to go read the soft version!
Definitely makes it to one of my top 10 reads for 2025!
May 31, 2026
Deliria
This was not my first time reading this author. I've read a few of her books now, in fact she's become one my new favorites 😍. Elle Sanders can write her a** off, OK! When she says this is the "HARD VERSION" she is not kidding!!! I read a lot, and I mean a lot of dark book and this was still a tough one for me to get through. But I am glad that I did. There are no happily-ever-afters to be found in this book, but what an amazing story it is!
This was not my first time reading this author. I've read a few of her books now, in fact she's become one my new favorites 😍. Elle Sanders can write her a** off, OK! When she says this is the "HARD VERSION" she is not kidding!!! I read a lot, and I mean a lot of dark book and this was still a tough one for me to get through. But I am glad that I did. There are no happily-ever-afters to be found in this book, but what an amazing story it is!
June 27, 2026
I will start this review by saying ... Check EVERY single trigger warning. I chose to read the Hard version (there are 2 versions) because I don't have many triggers (claustrophobic scenes, anything involving the harming of animals or children are my hard absolutely nots). Ellie is not lying when she says this is a HARD version. Honestly, if you have any reservations, proceed with caution.
I liked the story line, BUT it took me a while to like it. The story centers around a young woman, Scarlett, who has "amnesia" and wakes up in a house she vaguely remembers with a man, Alex, she knows quite well but doesn't remember where their relationship left off. You find out quickly they are "married" and that's ... about where the fluffy part of this story ends. Alex, oh and his father, are awful, vile, cruel and gross. I am trying to think of a few more endearing words for them... oh douchebags. Scarlett is a fighter - she takes ALOT from them but gets back up and fights more even though she is being drugged constantly. Rafe is Alex's brother and is really only redeeming towards the middle to end of this book when Scarlett and him finally join forces. The ending is a bit heart breaking.
I will say that I felt as though there were some holes in the story line and I could have used a bit more history. This is the only reason I gave it 4 stars instead of 5.
If you love pitch black, you will love the hard version of this book!
I liked the story line, BUT it took me a while to like it. The story centers around a young woman, Scarlett, who has "amnesia" and wakes up in a house she vaguely remembers with a man, Alex, she knows quite well but doesn't remember where their relationship left off. You find out quickly they are "married" and that's ... about where the fluffy part of this story ends. Alex, oh and his father, are awful, vile, cruel and gross. I am trying to think of a few more endearing words for them... oh douchebags. Scarlett is a fighter - she takes ALOT from them but gets back up and fights more even though she is being drugged constantly. Rafe is Alex's brother and is really only redeeming towards the middle to end of this book when Scarlett and him finally join forces. The ending is a bit heart breaking.
I will say that I felt as though there were some holes in the story line and I could have used a bit more history. This is the only reason I gave it 4 stars instead of 5.
If you love pitch black, you will love the hard version of this book!
July 6, 2025
I got what I asked for
I wanted to read something so embarrassingly dark and I got what I asked for. I read the triggers and knew there was no real HEA, but my heart broke still. After all that suffering they went through! Definitely psychologically messed up, but such a good read. Now I'm off to find a sweet romance to bring me happiness because this broke me.
I wanted to read something so embarrassingly dark and I got what I asked for. I read the triggers and knew there was no real HEA, but my heart broke still. After all that suffering they went through! Definitely psychologically messed up, but such a good read. Now I'm off to find a sweet romance to bring me happiness because this broke me.
January 3, 2026
I read the “Hard” version of this book. It had me pissed off seeing what Scarlett went through. The continued sexual abuse made my stomach turn so many times. But seeing how it was all part of the scheme she and her dad had?!? Man that was crazy. This was my first Ellie book and I really enjoyed her writing style.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
January 31, 2026
OMG.
If you want to ask yourself "What de h🔥ll is happening here?!" and you don't have tr!ggers, it's the book for you.
Just know that there is a soft version of this book and that you can choose to read a softer version of this one.
***
***
SPOILER
***
***
***
***
If you can live with a REALLY questionnable happy ending, this book is REALLY good!
Have fun 📖📚!
If you want to ask yourself "What de h🔥ll is happening here?!" and you don't have tr!ggers, it's the book for you.
Just know that there is a soft version of this book and that you can choose to read a softer version of this one.
***
***
SPOILER
***
***
***
***
If you can live with a REALLY questionnable happy ending, this book is REALLY good!
Have fun 📖📚!
January 31, 2026
black black black
THIS BOOK NEEDS TO BE MADE INTO AUDIO!
IF YOU DONT LIKE PITCH BLACK- this is not the book for you! Ellie was not kidding on her trigger warnings. On page 🍇 of male and female, gaslighting, and drugging made for a true mind-fuc/ing of the FMC. No HEA. No Hallmark ending here.
But the love story made me think we all want a love like Rafe.
THIS BOOK NEEDS TO BE MADE INTO AUDIO!
IF YOU DONT LIKE PITCH BLACK- this is not the book for you! Ellie was not kidding on her trigger warnings. On page 🍇 of male and female, gaslighting, and drugging made for a true mind-fuc/ing of the FMC. No HEA. No Hallmark ending here.
But the love story made me think we all want a love like Rafe.
July 2, 2026
Didn't Fully Click for Me
I was lost from the very first page and even stopped to make sure I hadn't accidentally started with the second book in the series. Unfortunately, I never felt grounded in the story, and I struggled to connect with the characters. While I can see how this book might appeal to other readers, it just wasn't the right fit for me
I was lost from the very first page and even stopped to make sure I hadn't accidentally started with the second book in the series. Unfortunately, I never felt grounded in the story, and I struggled to connect with the characters. While I can see how this book might appeal to other readers, it just wasn't the right fit for me
July 24, 2026
Whhhhaaaat. That ending….. I am just…. I absolutely love mind fucks like this. The whole time you’re trying to piece together the truth with our FMC. But goddamn what she has to go through…. Fuck. And absolutely wild ride. Although I love a mind fuck, the ending felt very quick without complete closure or understanding.
December 16, 2025
I really enjoyed this book. It was extremely dark and there were a lot of moments where I was sitting there saying “wtf” but I genuinely enjoyed reading this. I feel like I need to read a light fluffy book after this I will say however. The trigger list was LONG. Ellie sanders knows how to write a pitch black book no questions asked.
January 4, 2026
3.5/5
omg this was bonkers??????? i was hella confused at times like what the hell was even happening and damn this shit was dark like.... TW continuous on page brutal rape for the whole entire book.. kinda predicted the ending tho
omg this was bonkers??????? i was hella confused at times like what the hell was even happening and damn this shit was dark like.... TW continuous on page brutal rape for the whole entire book.. kinda predicted the ending tho
January 7, 2026
was absolutely unprepared for how deeply disturbing this book would be. no idea why i continued reading to the end. awful ending, but to be fair i was warned. had to take a break from reading after this, absolutely no joke
Displaying 1 - 30 of 48 reviews