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Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day
Birdie lost everything when her son died. Now, on track to rebuild her life, she has to evade her abusive partner Russ's rage and manipulations while also worrying about a home-invading serial killer that has descended on her community. Told through multiple POVs, from a decomposing murder victim to Birdie's day-to-day battle with domestic violence and grief to the horrific crimes of the killer, Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day will shock, disgust, and break your heart as the dark secrets unfold and Birdie does whatever she feels is necessary to protect the ones she loves.
"Of course you could use certain buzzwords like "brutal" and "shocking" to describe Emma E. Murray's novel Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day. However, those words would immediately fail to capture the unflinching cruelty and viciousness layered within the pages of this brilliant and deeply unpleasant novel centered around abuse, trauma, and decay. Despite this richly textured nastiness, there's also a distinct beauty, an attraction toward the grotesque and the undesirable woven throughout this masterful work. Emma E. Murray is one of the most original and fearless writers of new transgressive fiction." -Eric LaRocca, author of Things Have Gotten Worse Since We Last Spoke
"Everyone in this book is damaged, and Emma Murray is telling us how these wounds fester into diseased thoughts, the devaluing of human life, and the propagation of harm through rage and despair....A book for the hopeless and damned." -Charlene Elsby, author of The Devil Thinks I'm Pretty and Red Flags
"Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day is the stuff of domestic nightmares. Murray's novel gives the reader a fly-on-the-wall look at a monster. But fretting silently amidst the blood, guts, and depravity, is its protagonist-grieving, desperate, and verging on breakdown. An eerily terrifying tale that brings true crime hypotheticals to life, and imbues them with fragility, strength, and bone-deep sorrow." -Carson Winter, author of The Psychographist and Soft Targets
"There are some authors who I stand up and applaud immediately after reading their work and Emma E. Murray is one of them. Murray's writing is beautiful, but brutal, psychological, yet spiritual. Her examination of society, and of people, their depths of despair, and the effects of the machinations of manipulations is heart-wrenching. Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day is a socio-psychological and gruesome analysis and reconstruction of what and who we are, how we became that, and why." -Cynthia Pelayo, Bram Stoker Award-winning author of Vanishing Daughters
"Of course you could use certain buzzwords like "brutal" and "shocking" to describe Emma E. Murray's novel Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day. However, those words would immediately fail to capture the unflinching cruelty and viciousness layered within the pages of this brilliant and deeply unpleasant novel centered around abuse, trauma, and decay. Despite this richly textured nastiness, there's also a distinct beauty, an attraction toward the grotesque and the undesirable woven throughout this masterful work. Emma E. Murray is one of the most original and fearless writers of new transgressive fiction." -Eric LaRocca, author of Things Have Gotten Worse Since We Last Spoke
"Everyone in this book is damaged, and Emma Murray is telling us how these wounds fester into diseased thoughts, the devaluing of human life, and the propagation of harm through rage and despair....A book for the hopeless and damned." -Charlene Elsby, author of The Devil Thinks I'm Pretty and Red Flags
"Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day is the stuff of domestic nightmares. Murray's novel gives the reader a fly-on-the-wall look at a monster. But fretting silently amidst the blood, guts, and depravity, is its protagonist-grieving, desperate, and verging on breakdown. An eerily terrifying tale that brings true crime hypotheticals to life, and imbues them with fragility, strength, and bone-deep sorrow." -Carson Winter, author of The Psychographist and Soft Targets
"There are some authors who I stand up and applaud immediately after reading their work and Emma E. Murray is one of them. Murray's writing is beautiful, but brutal, psychological, yet spiritual. Her examination of society, and of people, their depths of despair, and the effects of the machinations of manipulations is heart-wrenching. Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day is a socio-psychological and gruesome analysis and reconstruction of what and who we are, how we became that, and why." -Cynthia Pelayo, Bram Stoker Award-winning author of Vanishing Daughters
304 pages, Kindle Edition
Published August 26, 2025
11 people are currently reading
664 people want to read
About the author
Emma E. Murray
27 books109 followersEmma E. Murray (she/her) explores the dark side of humanity in her fiction. Her work has appeared in Vastarien and Cosmic Horror Monthly among other places. Her works includes When the Devil, Crushing Snails, The Drowning Machine and Other Obsessions, and Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day. When she isn’t writing, she is usually found playing make-believe with her young daughter or make-believe with her friends (aka D&D).
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 41 reviews
August 17, 2025
Emma Murray's sophomore novel gets deep into the head of a traumatized woman and her boyfriend, who is not great. It took me a while to read because I had to go hug my kid after every chapter, but it was worth it!
The flag gets planted early, in a scene where a serial killer breaks into a home and finds his next victim with her baby on her chest. "Put him on the floor," he tells her. That scene sets the tone for the book, tonally and thematically: it's gonna be a rough ride.
Birdie's own son died in an accident that she's internalized as her fault. Murray does a subtle job of setting up the details of that incident: Birdie was being shitty in that crucial moment, so you can see why she's got it twisted, but the accident was in fact just one of those things. Could happen to anyone. You cannot keep your eye on your toddler all the time.
But her guilt destroys her self-esteem and she ends up in an abusive relationship, which Murray describes in awful, granular, excruciating detail: how she ends up this way, why she stays, how she justifies each incident. The big achievement of this book is that Murray gets you to understand how someone can be damaged enough to stay with a monster. It's sophisticated and careful work, and it's deeply empathetic. You know that old cruel "Why don't you just leave" cliche? Murray wants to show you the answer to that question.
Meanwhile, women are getting serial killed! Do you think these two storylines will come together? I do!
Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day is gnarly stuff. Remember that "Put him on the ground" scene I talked about earlier? If you don't think you can handle that scene, this isn't the book for you. But I think it's great work from a big talent; I was riveted and horrorstruck all the way through. Except for the parts where I was running off to hug my kid.
The flag gets planted early, in a scene where a serial killer breaks into a home and finds his next victim with her baby on her chest. "Put him on the floor," he tells her. That scene sets the tone for the book, tonally and thematically: it's gonna be a rough ride.
Birdie's own son died in an accident that she's internalized as her fault. Murray does a subtle job of setting up the details of that incident: Birdie was being shitty in that crucial moment, so you can see why she's got it twisted, but the accident was in fact just one of those things. Could happen to anyone. You cannot keep your eye on your toddler all the time.
But her guilt destroys her self-esteem and she ends up in an abusive relationship, which Murray describes in awful, granular, excruciating detail: how she ends up this way, why she stays, how she justifies each incident. The big achievement of this book is that Murray gets you to understand how someone can be damaged enough to stay with a monster. It's sophisticated and careful work, and it's deeply empathetic. You know that old cruel "Why don't you just leave" cliche? Murray wants to show you the answer to that question.
Meanwhile, women are getting serial killed! Do you think these two storylines will come together? I do!
Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day is gnarly stuff. Remember that "Put him on the ground" scene I talked about earlier? If you don't think you can handle that scene, this isn't the book for you. But I think it's great work from a big talent; I was riveted and horrorstruck all the way through. Except for the parts where I was running off to hug my kid.
July 25, 2025
I am blown away. I went in expecting darkness, but what I wasn’t prepared for was how beautiful this book would be too. Yes, it’s brutal and horrifying, but it’s also poetic and emotional, and haunting in a way I’ll be thinking about for a long time.
This story unfolds through three POVs:
• Birdie, a mother grieving the loss of her son and enduring a dangerously abusive relationship
• A decomposing body who no longer remembers who they were in life but desperately wants to be found
• A chilling mix of various victims stalked and murdered by a man who believes he’s untouchable
Birdie’s perspective was my favorite. You’re in her head as she rationalizes her partner Russ’s cruelty, clinging to fleeting memories of happiness to justify staying. It's painful, raw, and so realistic. You want to scream at her to leave, but the writing captures exactly how deeply trauma and guilt can distort your sense of reality.
Then there’s the decomposing body, which sounds like it would be pure body horror, but somehow, it’s not. Those chapters were almost peaceful. The way the body describes its own decay is strangely poetic. Instead of being disturbing, those passages made me think about death and what comes after in a softer, quieter way.
The victim POVs were the hardest for me to read. Not because they were poorly done, quite the opposite. The horror of believing you're safe in your own home, until you're not, is bone-deep. And while the identity of the killer becomes clear early on, I don’t think it hurts the story. If anything, it adds an extra layer of dread and frustration.
Emma E. Murray has done something extraordinary here. This is transgressive horror at its most gutting, and I genuinely believe more people need to read her work. Do not let this one go unnoticed. She is a force.
Thank you to Emma E. Murray for the eARC of this book. All opinions are my own.
This story unfolds through three POVs:
• Birdie, a mother grieving the loss of her son and enduring a dangerously abusive relationship
• A decomposing body who no longer remembers who they were in life but desperately wants to be found
• A chilling mix of various victims stalked and murdered by a man who believes he’s untouchable
Birdie’s perspective was my favorite. You’re in her head as she rationalizes her partner Russ’s cruelty, clinging to fleeting memories of happiness to justify staying. It's painful, raw, and so realistic. You want to scream at her to leave, but the writing captures exactly how deeply trauma and guilt can distort your sense of reality.
Then there’s the decomposing body, which sounds like it would be pure body horror, but somehow, it’s not. Those chapters were almost peaceful. The way the body describes its own decay is strangely poetic. Instead of being disturbing, those passages made me think about death and what comes after in a softer, quieter way.
The victim POVs were the hardest for me to read. Not because they were poorly done, quite the opposite. The horror of believing you're safe in your own home, until you're not, is bone-deep. And while the identity of the killer becomes clear early on, I don’t think it hurts the story. If anything, it adds an extra layer of dread and frustration.
Emma E. Murray has done something extraordinary here. This is transgressive horror at its most gutting, and I genuinely believe more people need to read her work. Do not let this one go unnoticed. She is a force.
Thank you to Emma E. Murray for the eARC of this book. All opinions are my own.
May 12, 2025
I've often wondered how victims of domestic abuse might rationalize to themselves their never leaving their abuser. Not as a question of psychology, but as a matter of motivation: how does a battered woman justify to herself the fact that she stays with the man (or woman, or whatever - abuse has no pronouns) who's making her life hell? It's very hard to believe that she doesn't realize she's enabling him.
"Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day" is precisely a book touching on this theme, displaying a deep understanding of the issue, and weaving a tale of abuse with such virtuosity it soon becomes scary to follow the author down this path - you never know how much of what's going on might actually turn out to be exactly what you would have done in this situation. The justifications and the motivation of the victim start making sense: she's traumatized to such a degree, that no other avenue seems open to her. She believes that, ultimately, she deserves it. And that's the real horror of this horrifying book. No real, fancy, or well-grounded justification is needed: just hold the belief that this is what you, as a victim, fully deserve, and everything else follows.
Once I'd grasped this, the serial killer part of the story came as a bonus: I doubt it breaks any new ground, save to bring out how some of the poor women brutalized by the killer might have avoided their fate, if they'd trusted themselves more. This shouldn't be misunderstood as blaming the victim; on the contrary, it shows how dangerous a place a man's world can be for women, to the extent that sometimes not even they can fully acknowledge the danger they're in.
The ending went places I didn't expect. It provided some relief after all the darkness, though it's the kind of relief only painkillers provide. It's one thing to feel you deserve the evil happening to you, and another to finally find redemption and overcome that feeling: is that true healing? It felt like cheating yourself out of true recovery. Either way, the book certainly gives redemption a chance, and irony and semantics aside, it's exactly what I as a reader needed after so much gloom and bleakness.
Emma Murray has written a modern tragedy, I believe. I recommend the book if you dig Eric LaRocca's fiction, or the haunting prose of Alison Rumfitt.
"Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day" is precisely a book touching on this theme, displaying a deep understanding of the issue, and weaving a tale of abuse with such virtuosity it soon becomes scary to follow the author down this path - you never know how much of what's going on might actually turn out to be exactly what you would have done in this situation. The justifications and the motivation of the victim start making sense: she's traumatized to such a degree, that no other avenue seems open to her. She believes that, ultimately, she deserves it. And that's the real horror of this horrifying book. No real, fancy, or well-grounded justification is needed: just hold the belief that this is what you, as a victim, fully deserve, and everything else follows.
Once I'd grasped this, the serial killer part of the story came as a bonus: I doubt it breaks any new ground, save to bring out how some of the poor women brutalized by the killer might have avoided their fate, if they'd trusted themselves more. This shouldn't be misunderstood as blaming the victim; on the contrary, it shows how dangerous a place a man's world can be for women, to the extent that sometimes not even they can fully acknowledge the danger they're in.
The ending went places I didn't expect. It provided some relief after all the darkness, though it's the kind of relief only painkillers provide. It's one thing to feel you deserve the evil happening to you, and another to finally find redemption and overcome that feeling: is that true healing? It felt like cheating yourself out of true recovery. Either way, the book certainly gives redemption a chance, and irony and semantics aside, it's exactly what I as a reader needed after so much gloom and bleakness.
Emma Murray has written a modern tragedy, I believe. I recommend the book if you dig Eric LaRocca's fiction, or the haunting prose of Alison Rumfitt.
June 6, 2025
This book absolutely destroyed me in the best possible way
This book follows three main points. The pov of a decaying body yearning to be found and identified, the povs of multiple women being targeted and hunted down by a home invader/serial killer, and Birdie, a woman in a toxic relationship full of domestic violence and gaslighting from her abusive partner
The book itself contains an elegant balance of horror and beauty. The horror comes from the unimaginable terror that is everyone's worst nightmare come true, to be targeted in your own home where you feel most secure, to have that ripped out from underneath you. The beauty comes from the writing itself as Murray writes in such a way that brings these characters and situations to life that feels all too real (so real in fact that I needed to stop multiple times while reading just to re-center myself)
And then there's Birdie... reading her story was just so heartbreaking. Her unflinching love and devotion for her partner, Russ, possibly the most contemptible character I've ever read, was just so hard to read. You yearn for her to get herself out of her situation as she slides deeper and deeper into it. Anybody familiar with the insidious grip of caustic love that comes with an abusive relationship knows all too well the excuses and justifications you make in those situations and it's rough to watch
Art of any kind is supposed to make you feel and evoke emotion, good or bad, and this book does that in spades. Murray straddles the line of horror, both extreme and tansgressive, and writes beautifully in the goldilocks zone between dark and too dark. The writing is expertly constructed and her ability to tug on the reader's heartstrings is powerful. This book easily has become an all time favorite of mine
This book follows three main points. The pov of a decaying body yearning to be found and identified, the povs of multiple women being targeted and hunted down by a home invader/serial killer, and Birdie, a woman in a toxic relationship full of domestic violence and gaslighting from her abusive partner
The book itself contains an elegant balance of horror and beauty. The horror comes from the unimaginable terror that is everyone's worst nightmare come true, to be targeted in your own home where you feel most secure, to have that ripped out from underneath you. The beauty comes from the writing itself as Murray writes in such a way that brings these characters and situations to life that feels all too real (so real in fact that I needed to stop multiple times while reading just to re-center myself)
And then there's Birdie... reading her story was just so heartbreaking. Her unflinching love and devotion for her partner, Russ, possibly the most contemptible character I've ever read, was just so hard to read. You yearn for her to get herself out of her situation as she slides deeper and deeper into it. Anybody familiar with the insidious grip of caustic love that comes with an abusive relationship knows all too well the excuses and justifications you make in those situations and it's rough to watch
Art of any kind is supposed to make you feel and evoke emotion, good or bad, and this book does that in spades. Murray straddles the line of horror, both extreme and tansgressive, and writes beautifully in the goldilocks zone between dark and too dark. The writing is expertly constructed and her ability to tug on the reader's heartstrings is powerful. This book easily has become an all time favorite of mine
August 12, 2025
I need to sit with this one for a moment. Currently staring at the wall. What a gloriously written, fucked up story.
Upon further reflection, this story is really so profound. Beyond the rage and shock of the abuse is a tale of grief, feeling like you don't deserve better and coming to the realization your situation is so much more messed up than you have been willing to acknowledge. This book is brave. It stares at the ugly right in the eyes and does not look away. Thank you to Emma for the ARC and to Adam for facilitating. As always, be mindful of your own consumption if you worry over triggers. You can pick this up when it publishes August 26th.
Upon further reflection, this story is really so profound. Beyond the rage and shock of the abuse is a tale of grief, feeling like you don't deserve better and coming to the realization your situation is so much more messed up than you have been willing to acknowledge. This book is brave. It stares at the ugly right in the eyes and does not look away. Thank you to Emma for the ARC and to Adam for facilitating. As always, be mindful of your own consumption if you worry over triggers. You can pick this up when it publishes August 26th.
June 6, 2025
Murray does it again! Another heart wrenching horror novel that makes you sit in the uncomfortable silent screams for help. I want to thank Emma for allowing me to read an ARC copy of this devastating master piece. Only Emma can trigger me and make me come back begging for more.
In this story we follow Birdie who lost her son and then entered an abusive relationship. The gaslighting and the mood swings of Russ were so realistic that they were very triggering having been through an abusive relationship myself. I would have to put the book down several times to recover but it didn’t stop me from wanting the rest of the story.
Along with the relationship between Birdie and Russ there is a serial killer/ (g)rapist on the loose and even a chapters from the POV of a conscious corpse waiting to be found. The stories and their devastations all interwoven to perfection.
In this story we follow Birdie who lost her son and then entered an abusive relationship. The gaslighting and the mood swings of Russ were so realistic that they were very triggering having been through an abusive relationship myself. I would have to put the book down several times to recover but it didn’t stop me from wanting the rest of the story.
Along with the relationship between Birdie and Russ there is a serial killer/ (g)rapist on the loose and even a chapters from the POV of a conscious corpse waiting to be found. The stories and their devastations all interwoven to perfection.
August 14, 2025
This book was heartbreaking and still beautiful. It really focuses on some heavy topics specifically targeting the cycle of domestic abuse and serial un-aliving of women
I really don't want to give anything away about the story itself but my heart broke for Birdie. I lost track of the times I was reading and thinking girl why don't you just leave that man?!
I loved that this was told from multiple perspectives. Reading from the perspective of a corpse was a gut-wrenching experience. Those chapters were some of the most powerful things I've read in a long time.
I received a copy in exchange for my honest review.
I really don't want to give anything away about the story itself but my heart broke for Birdie. I lost track of the times I was reading and thinking girl why don't you just leave that man?!
I loved that this was told from multiple perspectives. Reading from the perspective of a corpse was a gut-wrenching experience. Those chapters were some of the most powerful things I've read in a long time.
I received a copy in exchange for my honest review.
October 28, 2025
"I'm not afraid if this is eternity, but it doesn't make sense. There must be an end. How will I continue on when I've degraded past human recognition, eroded to the particles that make up my cells? I try not to focus on those questions and just enjoy the peace. There will be an answer someday, and there's no use in worrying, trying to rush things along. Dying is fast, but breaking down is a slow, beautiful process."
4.5
Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day is as gorgeous as it is grotesque, it is as brutal and horrific as it is stunning and enrapturing. It's poetic, and beautifully written, yet devastating and ruinous, it's one of those rare horror novels that will forever haunt you, much like a lover who carves their name into your skin, it will forever be a part of you. If we take a simplistic approach to this novel, it's a story about a serial killer - beyond the surface, however, as we dig deeper towards the festering, rotting core, beats a more gentle heart, one that offers up a softer, almost intimate look at violence and death. This is what transgressive horror should be, it is courageous and evocative, challenging and completely gnarly, it refuses to shy away from anything in its portrayal of victimization and abuse.
Something strangely brilliant about this novel is that it leads us to the identity of the killer early on, not only does this strip us readers of our power, leaving us both frustrated and anxious as the story progresses, it also shifts the focus away from the killer, allowing us to pay attention to the victims of this story. This is, without a doubt, one of the very best horror novels to release in 2025 - It is an intensely tragic thing, reading it actually hurts, it makes you hate living, but also makes you so happy that you exist in a time where books like this are being published. There's just, such a profoundly sad quality about this book, it really is brave, I fully believe that this is what horror was always intended to be.
Murray's portrayal of an abusive relationship cycle is so authentic, so pitch-perfect, that at times, it makes you absolutely detest the main character, then, it makes you love her, then it makes you feel like a huge, stinking bag of shit for ever being able to hate her. It is entirely steadfast in its exploration of abuse, and forces us to confront the reality of isolation and toxicity in relationships with a sickening clarity. There is a disconcerting level of warmth to this story, it manages to both enchant and appall. I think that when novels explore suicidality in the way that this one does, making it less a grandiose spectacle and instead, a rather mundane, pedestrian thing, that's magical - that's real authenticity. Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day will ruin you in the best possible way.
"The insects come in waves, covering me and disappearing into every orifice, sometimes creating new entrances through their own frantic burrowing. Blowflies, maggots, and so many others. I welcome their companionship. A melancholic loneliness has descended over me as time loses meaning and I've learned to embrace their visits. They're part of the process as I slowly liquefy into the wet mulch around me. I feel them nestle in and lay their eggs in the moist hiding spaces they've found in me, and I thank them for their part in my disintegration back into the earth."
4.5
Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day is as gorgeous as it is grotesque, it is as brutal and horrific as it is stunning and enrapturing. It's poetic, and beautifully written, yet devastating and ruinous, it's one of those rare horror novels that will forever haunt you, much like a lover who carves their name into your skin, it will forever be a part of you. If we take a simplistic approach to this novel, it's a story about a serial killer - beyond the surface, however, as we dig deeper towards the festering, rotting core, beats a more gentle heart, one that offers up a softer, almost intimate look at violence and death. This is what transgressive horror should be, it is courageous and evocative, challenging and completely gnarly, it refuses to shy away from anything in its portrayal of victimization and abuse.
Something strangely brilliant about this novel is that it leads us to the identity of the killer early on, not only does this strip us readers of our power, leaving us both frustrated and anxious as the story progresses, it also shifts the focus away from the killer, allowing us to pay attention to the victims of this story. This is, without a doubt, one of the very best horror novels to release in 2025 - It is an intensely tragic thing, reading it actually hurts, it makes you hate living, but also makes you so happy that you exist in a time where books like this are being published. There's just, such a profoundly sad quality about this book, it really is brave, I fully believe that this is what horror was always intended to be.
"Curling up on the bed, I think about all the ways I could join Noah tonight. The family sized bottle of ibuprofen, whatever else we have lying around in the medicine cabinet, and the full handle of vodka in the freezer to chase it. A long, hot bath with a scented candle and the sharpest kitchen knife against my veins, vertical cuts so they can't stitch me up even if I get scared and call an ambulance. I think of Russ's gun and wonder if it's still down in the creek. How painful would a bullet to the brain be? Would it hurt for even a fraction of a second? I drift to sleep before I can decide. I'd like to think it's because I don't really want to do it, that my life is worth living, but deep down, it's more likely I'm just a coward."
Murray's portrayal of an abusive relationship cycle is so authentic, so pitch-perfect, that at times, it makes you absolutely detest the main character, then, it makes you love her, then it makes you feel like a huge, stinking bag of shit for ever being able to hate her. It is entirely steadfast in its exploration of abuse, and forces us to confront the reality of isolation and toxicity in relationships with a sickening clarity. There is a disconcerting level of warmth to this story, it manages to both enchant and appall. I think that when novels explore suicidality in the way that this one does, making it less a grandiose spectacle and instead, a rather mundane, pedestrian thing, that's magical - that's real authenticity. Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day will ruin you in the best possible way.
"The insects come in waves, covering me and disappearing into every orifice, sometimes creating new entrances through their own frantic burrowing. Blowflies, maggots, and so many others. I welcome their companionship. A melancholic loneliness has descended over me as time loses meaning and I've learned to embrace their visits. They're part of the process as I slowly liquefy into the wet mulch around me. I feel them nestle in and lay their eggs in the moist hiding spaces they've found in me, and I thank them for their part in my disintegration back into the earth."
June 29, 2025
I was worried that since I loved Crushing Snails so much by Murray, I would somehow not feel the same about this book. I was so incredibly wrong! She is easily going to be an auto-buy author and she’s my gateway into transgressive fiction and I want to eat up more!
Birdie has suffered an unimaginable loss. During her struggle to not take her own life she finds a sliver of hope when she meets Russ. Handsome and kind with piercing blue eyes. It’s not too long into their relationship that the abusive side of Russ comes to the surface. Sleepless nights, lies, manipulation, trauma, love bombing, violence… but also an incredible and toxic obsession and love for each other. It is bound to explode, eventually.
This story is told from different perspectives about Birdie and Russ’s story - mainly from Birdie, but while this is unfolding there are chapters that tell the stories of different women all being attacked and murdered by what appears to be the same man. The moving between perspectives made this book so easy to read and needing to know what happens next. Anxiety and dread hold your hand the rest of the way.
Murray is able to write the cycle of an abusive relationship in such a way that you want to hate Birdie and then hold her and love her. It’s such a good depiction of what abuse can look like and how hard it is for those in these relationships to finally leave.
Please read Emma E. Murray! She’s one to watch for. I had the pleasure of reading this book as an ARC in exchange for an honest review. This comes out on August 26th. Happy reading!
Birdie has suffered an unimaginable loss. During her struggle to not take her own life she finds a sliver of hope when she meets Russ. Handsome and kind with piercing blue eyes. It’s not too long into their relationship that the abusive side of Russ comes to the surface. Sleepless nights, lies, manipulation, trauma, love bombing, violence… but also an incredible and toxic obsession and love for each other. It is bound to explode, eventually.
This story is told from different perspectives about Birdie and Russ’s story - mainly from Birdie, but while this is unfolding there are chapters that tell the stories of different women all being attacked and murdered by what appears to be the same man. The moving between perspectives made this book so easy to read and needing to know what happens next. Anxiety and dread hold your hand the rest of the way.
Murray is able to write the cycle of an abusive relationship in such a way that you want to hate Birdie and then hold her and love her. It’s such a good depiction of what abuse can look like and how hard it is for those in these relationships to finally leave.
Please read Emma E. Murray! She’s one to watch for. I had the pleasure of reading this book as an ARC in exchange for an honest review. This comes out on August 26th. Happy reading!
May 16, 2025
What a book! I went into this blind and was so shocked with it.
We start with the body of a woman in the woods near a hiking path. slowly decomposing yet her spirit still remains. she's been brutally murdered and that's all she remembers.
Then we have Birdie, a mother who feels responsible for the death of her young son and is in a seriously abusive relationship. Russ her partner is physically and emotionally controlling her. It really highlights abusive relationships and how the victim can't just leave.
Last, but not least, we have the POV of the Serial Killers. stalking his victims and killing all over the area.
There are also multiple POVs of the victims as we go along and it all joins together in the end. I actually found this quite emotional. Going from angry, to sad and everything in between. A fantastic story that ended perfectly.
We start with the body of a woman in the woods near a hiking path. slowly decomposing yet her spirit still remains. she's been brutally murdered and that's all she remembers.
Then we have Birdie, a mother who feels responsible for the death of her young son and is in a seriously abusive relationship. Russ her partner is physically and emotionally controlling her. It really highlights abusive relationships and how the victim can't just leave.
Last, but not least, we have the POV of the Serial Killers. stalking his victims and killing all over the area.
There are also multiple POVs of the victims as we go along and it all joins together in the end. I actually found this quite emotional. Going from angry, to sad and everything in between. A fantastic story that ended perfectly.
October 30, 2025
My singular complaint (other than being completely gutted, which I've come to expect from Emma) is the misleading title...... bc goddammit I wish she WOULD have.
May 15, 2025
Starting a story in deceased first person is fascinating! From the jump, Emma Murray hooks the reader into wanting more. Her matter-of-fact way of describing the indescribable is jarringly comforting. We meet a number of characters and immediately know them, and care about their demise. Murray sweeps us through multiple narratives that compel and enchant; speeding us to an ending that is simultaneously frustrating and satisfying.
August 12, 2025
I want to start this review by saying that I'm a desensitized POS, and that I'm in no way trying to degrade or diminish what this novel is trying to express. However, I have a very high threshold for being able to handle fucked up shit, and sometimes things just don't hit me the way they hit others. This book deals heavily with DV (domestic violence) so please read responsibly. I have verbal/psychological trauma baggage-so I think this effects my perception as well. I'm very good at disassociating.
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All that being said, Emma E. Murray is a very talented writer. This novel is written very well- and I felt that the characters were portrayed in a very realistic way. DV is a complicated issue, and I felt that the storyline really made me feel that way. I felt, and still feel very indifferent about this novel- and I think that's because it's very emotionally heavy material.
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This story is told through multiple POVs- a serial killer, a decomposing body and Birdie the FMC. I found the serial killer parts of the book to be a little too predictable, but they were included for a reason. The prose from the decomposing body was stylistic and beautiful. And as for Birdie, I just felt sad for her.
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Overall, this novel was beautifully written and very artistic. I just had a really hard time connecting to the story, but I think that's a 'me thing' not necessarily the novel. If you love heavy, transgressive horror this one is definitely one to add to your TBR.
**Thank you so much to Emma E. Murray for providing an eARC of Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day prior to publication in exchange for my honest review. Expected Pub Date 8/26/2025**
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All that being said, Emma E. Murray is a very talented writer. This novel is written very well- and I felt that the characters were portrayed in a very realistic way. DV is a complicated issue, and I felt that the storyline really made me feel that way. I felt, and still feel very indifferent about this novel- and I think that's because it's very emotionally heavy material.
.
This story is told through multiple POVs- a serial killer, a decomposing body and Birdie the FMC. I found the serial killer parts of the book to be a little too predictable, but they were included for a reason. The prose from the decomposing body was stylistic and beautiful. And as for Birdie, I just felt sad for her.
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Overall, this novel was beautifully written and very artistic. I just had a really hard time connecting to the story, but I think that's a 'me thing' not necessarily the novel. If you love heavy, transgressive horror this one is definitely one to add to your TBR.
**Thank you so much to Emma E. Murray for providing an eARC of Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day prior to publication in exchange for my honest review. Expected Pub Date 8/26/2025**
December 4, 2025
This is told from three different POVs. Birdie is a grieving mother that is also dealing with an abusive relationship. The victims of a serial killer, and a decomposing body wanting to be found. All three were woven together so beautifully.
This was absolutely soul crushing but so beautifully written. The body POV was heart breaking as you can imagine. Because isn't that what we all want, to be found and seen.
The different woman POV was terrifying because everyone wants to feel safe in their own homes. Knowing someone is running around wanting to do harm is horrifying.
Birdie's POV was the hardest for me to read. Having dealt with an abusive relationship in the past it brought up a lot. Emma's writing was fantastic in this storyline. Jumping between the anger and the sweetness of Russ was perfect.
This was a tough but beautifully written story. I absolutely loved it but definitely check your triggers.
This was absolutely soul crushing but so beautifully written. The body POV was heart breaking as you can imagine. Because isn't that what we all want, to be found and seen.
The different woman POV was terrifying because everyone wants to feel safe in their own homes. Knowing someone is running around wanting to do harm is horrifying.
Birdie's POV was the hardest for me to read. Having dealt with an abusive relationship in the past it brought up a lot. Emma's writing was fantastic in this storyline. Jumping between the anger and the sweetness of Russ was perfect.
This was a tough but beautifully written story. I absolutely loved it but definitely check your triggers.
August 26, 2025
A haunting but beautiful story about trauma and evil.
This is honestly one of the darkest books I’ve ever read. There’s no happiness here, no relief, no neat little bow at the end. It hurts. But it also feels necessary. Sometimes we need books like this, the ones that drag you into the pain and force you to sit with it.
The story follows Birdie, a woman grieving the loss of her son and marriage. She’s already broken when she meets Russ and he takes full advantage of that. He’s not just toxic, he’s calculated. A gaslighter in every sense of the word. He’s charming, cruel, manipulative, and violent. Birdie, buried under guilt, convinces herself she deserves it. And that’s where the heartbreak really hit me.
What I loved about how Birdie was written is that she didn’t come across as “weak” the way abuse victims often unfortunately do in fiction. She felt real. She was already falling apart, and Russ just happened to be there to push her further. That cycle of denial and survival was so honest and so painful that I think a lot of women will recognize parts of themselves in Birdie. We’ve all been taught to make ourselves smaller, quieter, easier…. just to keep someone else from exploding. Birdie embodied that perfectly, and it hurt to watch.
And then there’s Russ. God, I despised him. His gaslighting made my skin crawl. When he turned on the charm, I literally cringed, because I knew what was coming next. His anger jumped off the page in a way that felt physical, like you could almost hear the snap before the blow. He doesn’t just read like one horrible man. He reads like every horrible man rolled into one. He embodies the hatred that men have for us.
The horror side of this book is what really pushed it over the edge for me. There’s a serial killer running loose, but what fascinated me most was the rot. Getting POV chapters from a corpse was grotesque and unsettling in the best way, and it tied into the story so well.
The abuse scenes were some of the scariest I’ve ever read, because they felt so real. The way Birdie braces herself. The silence. The placating. That dread when you know an outburst is coming but you don’t know when. It made my stomach twist. The abuse cycle was written so painfully well. And the home invasion scenes? They’ll stick with me forever. I locked every door and window in my house after reading.
This book is going to stay with me for a long, long time. It’s not easy, it’s not comforting, but it IS unforgettable. Birdie broke me. Russ enraged me. And the rot will haunt me.
If you’re looking for a book that unsettles you to your core, one that feels both horrifying and real…. this is it.
****** Please check all trigger warnings for this one. *******
Thank you to Emma E. Murray for an e-copy. I’ll be looking in to more of her work!
This is honestly one of the darkest books I’ve ever read. There’s no happiness here, no relief, no neat little bow at the end. It hurts. But it also feels necessary. Sometimes we need books like this, the ones that drag you into the pain and force you to sit with it.
The story follows Birdie, a woman grieving the loss of her son and marriage. She’s already broken when she meets Russ and he takes full advantage of that. He’s not just toxic, he’s calculated. A gaslighter in every sense of the word. He’s charming, cruel, manipulative, and violent. Birdie, buried under guilt, convinces herself she deserves it. And that’s where the heartbreak really hit me.
What I loved about how Birdie was written is that she didn’t come across as “weak” the way abuse victims often unfortunately do in fiction. She felt real. She was already falling apart, and Russ just happened to be there to push her further. That cycle of denial and survival was so honest and so painful that I think a lot of women will recognize parts of themselves in Birdie. We’ve all been taught to make ourselves smaller, quieter, easier…. just to keep someone else from exploding. Birdie embodied that perfectly, and it hurt to watch.
And then there’s Russ. God, I despised him. His gaslighting made my skin crawl. When he turned on the charm, I literally cringed, because I knew what was coming next. His anger jumped off the page in a way that felt physical, like you could almost hear the snap before the blow. He doesn’t just read like one horrible man. He reads like every horrible man rolled into one. He embodies the hatred that men have for us.
The horror side of this book is what really pushed it over the edge for me. There’s a serial killer running loose, but what fascinated me most was the rot. Getting POV chapters from a corpse was grotesque and unsettling in the best way, and it tied into the story so well.
The abuse scenes were some of the scariest I’ve ever read, because they felt so real. The way Birdie braces herself. The silence. The placating. That dread when you know an outburst is coming but you don’t know when. It made my stomach twist. The abuse cycle was written so painfully well. And the home invasion scenes? They’ll stick with me forever. I locked every door and window in my house after reading.
This book is going to stay with me for a long, long time. It’s not easy, it’s not comforting, but it IS unforgettable. Birdie broke me. Russ enraged me. And the rot will haunt me.
If you’re looking for a book that unsettles you to your core, one that feels both horrifying and real…. this is it.
****** Please check all trigger warnings for this one. *******
Thank you to Emma E. Murray for an e-copy. I’ll be looking in to more of her work!
May 31, 2025
This novel delivers an emotional experience, with the horrors of DV, SA, and murder. Russ's cruelty and manipulations make him one of the most detested antagonists I have ever read.
The writing is stunning, particularly from the dead girl's perspective, which add an eerie layer to the narrative. The author evokes emotions of fear, sorrow, and frustration, making the story feel raw and painfully real. It's a beautifully written but unsettling novel.
The writing is stunning, particularly from the dead girl's perspective, which add an eerie layer to the narrative. The author evokes emotions of fear, sorrow, and frustration, making the story feel raw and painfully real. It's a beautifully written but unsettling novel.
July 31, 2025
DAMN. HEAVY AND HORRIFIC. EXCELLENTLY WRITTEN.
September 10, 2025
The main character, Birdie, was sooooo frustrating but it’s understandable that she would have a hard time believing what Juliana was trying to tell her. It was easy to sympathize with Birdie even after learning about the “bad” thing in her past. But Juliana is better than me because I wanted to grab Birdie by the shoulders and shake her. That’s the thing about being in a relationship with someone like Russ though, people are too close and don’t see it or are scared to leave. I was absolutely blown away by the reveal that I don’t want to spoil so I won’t get too into it. I just loved the format and the way this story was told. It is such a painful story, and pretty graphic— definitely not for the faint of heart. Check the content warnings!!
September 2, 2025
Thank you to the author for providing a review copy.
To say that I "enjoyed" this book would be a bit of a misnomer. This is not an enjoyable book. It is crushingly, unrelentingly dark, and some parts hit a little close to home, but is is an important book. The fact that is it so well-written adds to the horror. Despite all that, every time I picked it up, I was riveted and invested. The serial killer part of the story doesn't break any new ground and, to me, took a backseat to Birdie's story. But it does hammer home that you should always, always trust your gut. This book put me through the ringer emotionally, but I am recommending it. 4.5 stars
To say that I "enjoyed" this book would be a bit of a misnomer. This is not an enjoyable book. It is crushingly, unrelentingly dark, and some parts hit a little close to home, but is is an important book. The fact that is it so well-written adds to the horror. Despite all that, every time I picked it up, I was riveted and invested. The serial killer part of the story doesn't break any new ground and, to me, took a backseat to Birdie's story. But it does hammer home that you should always, always trust your gut. This book put me through the ringer emotionally, but I am recommending it. 4.5 stars
September 5, 2025
Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day
By Emma E. Murray
Publisher: Apocalypse Party
Publication date: August 26, 2025
ASIN: B0F9B7ZV6J
Page Count: 304
Triggers: Domestic violence, child loss, gaslighting, sexual assault, murder, grief, psychological abuse, stalking, graphic violence
Star Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Skull Dread Rating: 💀💀💀 (gut-punch dread, not cheap scares)
This book did not gently take me by the hand. It shoved me into a pit, threw the shovel on top, and said, “Good luck, sweetheart.” And I loved every bleak, miserable second of it.
Birdie, our main character, is drowning in grief over the loss of her son while trapped with Russ, a partner who makes Satan look like a slightly moody roommate. Meanwhile, there is a serial killer breaking into homes like he is auditioning for Worst Human Alive. If that is not enough, we also get a POV from a decomposing corpse. Yes, you read that correctly. And somehow, it is weirdly poetic.
This novel is vicious, heartbreaking, and against all odds beautiful. The writing swings from gut-churning to lyrical in the same paragraph. One moment you are gagging, the next you are underlining sentences because damn, that was stunning. Ms. Emma E. Murray has the nerve to make you sympathize, rage, cry, and stare at the wall in silence, sometimes all within the same chapter.
Birdie’s chapters hit hardest. They are so painfully authentic that you want to scream at her, hug her, and maybe even write her a self-help pamphlet titled Dump His Ass, Birdie. The decomposing body sections are strangely tender, reminding you that even in death, people still long to be seen. The killer’s POV is pure dread fuel.
Check your triggers before you dive in, because this book does not flinch. Domestic violence, child loss, murder, it is all here, raw and unrelenting. But if you can handle it, what you will find is transgressive horror at its most devastating, the kind that makes you think about the rot under society’s skin long after you close the book.
What Did I Just Walk Into?
A beautifully written trauma spiral where grief, abuse, and serial murder play hot potato with your emotions.
Here’s What Slapped:
The corpse POV, original, haunting, and oddly moving
Birdie’s voice, so painfully real it will crawl into your ribcage
Ms. Murray’s prose, equal parts poetic and gut-stabbing
What Could’ve Been Better:
Some pacing dips, sure, but when you are this emotionally gutted, who is really keeping score?
Perfect for Readers Who Love:
Domestic horror that rips your heart out (and then pokes it with a stick)
Stories that straddle the line between poetic and stomach-turning
Characters so real you want to shake them, hug them, and scream at them all at once
P.S. Ms. Emma E. Murray just made me a fan for life.
Reviewed by Robin for Robin’s Review
By Emma E. Murray
Publisher: Apocalypse Party
Publication date: August 26, 2025
ASIN: B0F9B7ZV6J
Page Count: 304
Triggers: Domestic violence, child loss, gaslighting, sexual assault, murder, grief, psychological abuse, stalking, graphic violence
Star Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Skull Dread Rating: 💀💀💀 (gut-punch dread, not cheap scares)
This book did not gently take me by the hand. It shoved me into a pit, threw the shovel on top, and said, “Good luck, sweetheart.” And I loved every bleak, miserable second of it.
Birdie, our main character, is drowning in grief over the loss of her son while trapped with Russ, a partner who makes Satan look like a slightly moody roommate. Meanwhile, there is a serial killer breaking into homes like he is auditioning for Worst Human Alive. If that is not enough, we also get a POV from a decomposing corpse. Yes, you read that correctly. And somehow, it is weirdly poetic.
This novel is vicious, heartbreaking, and against all odds beautiful. The writing swings from gut-churning to lyrical in the same paragraph. One moment you are gagging, the next you are underlining sentences because damn, that was stunning. Ms. Emma E. Murray has the nerve to make you sympathize, rage, cry, and stare at the wall in silence, sometimes all within the same chapter.
Birdie’s chapters hit hardest. They are so painfully authentic that you want to scream at her, hug her, and maybe even write her a self-help pamphlet titled Dump His Ass, Birdie. The decomposing body sections are strangely tender, reminding you that even in death, people still long to be seen. The killer’s POV is pure dread fuel.
Check your triggers before you dive in, because this book does not flinch. Domestic violence, child loss, murder, it is all here, raw and unrelenting. But if you can handle it, what you will find is transgressive horror at its most devastating, the kind that makes you think about the rot under society’s skin long after you close the book.
What Did I Just Walk Into?
A beautifully written trauma spiral where grief, abuse, and serial murder play hot potato with your emotions.
Here’s What Slapped:
The corpse POV, original, haunting, and oddly moving
Birdie’s voice, so painfully real it will crawl into your ribcage
Ms. Murray’s prose, equal parts poetic and gut-stabbing
What Could’ve Been Better:
Some pacing dips, sure, but when you are this emotionally gutted, who is really keeping score?
Perfect for Readers Who Love:
Domestic horror that rips your heart out (and then pokes it with a stick)
Stories that straddle the line between poetic and stomach-turning
Characters so real you want to shake them, hug them, and scream at them all at once
P.S. Ms. Emma E. Murray just made me a fan for life.
Reviewed by Robin for Robin’s Review
November 29, 2025
I finished this book. So, the writing itself is fine. I wanted to find out how the author was going to end it. There were a couple typos, and a single use of "mindless droll" which didn't quite make sense to me.
The protagonist is unbelievable. Truly hard to believe she 180s so much. One scene, she's hopeful her partner won't return because he's abusive. The next he's
There's a couple generally good characters, Charlie and Juliana, and many of the victims are decently characterized within the one or two chapters they get. I think the frame narrative being the body decaying was interesting enough.
I do have to call attention to the courtroom scenes. The prosecutor cross examines a witness before the defense attorney conducts a direct examination. Just a little bit of editing or research could have kept the courtroom scenes from being so starkly wrong. The defense attorney objects to the prosecutor for leading the witness. It's cross examination, every question will be leading.
Overall, the book has choppy pacing. Facts are brought up suddenly that completely shift how we as the reader should feel about a character during a conversation or scene. A major part of this might have to do with the author not wanting to reveal the protagonist's backstory. Also just going back to the courtroom,
Tough to have a book where a majority of the narration is through frustrating characters. I'm actually quite shocked at the glowing reviews for this novel.
The protagonist is unbelievable. Truly hard to believe she 180s so much. One scene, she's hopeful her partner won't return because he's abusive. The next he's
There's a couple generally good characters, Charlie and Juliana, and many of the victims are decently characterized within the one or two chapters they get. I think the frame narrative being the body decaying was interesting enough.
I do have to call attention to the courtroom scenes. The prosecutor cross examines a witness before the defense attorney conducts a direct examination. Just a little bit of editing or research could have kept the courtroom scenes from being so starkly wrong. The defense attorney objects to the prosecutor for leading the witness. It's cross examination, every question will be leading.
Overall, the book has choppy pacing. Facts are brought up suddenly that completely shift how we as the reader should feel about a character during a conversation or scene. A major part of this might have to do with the author not wanting to reveal the protagonist's backstory. Also just going back to the courtroom,
Tough to have a book where a majority of the narration is through frustrating characters. I'm actually quite shocked at the glowing reviews for this novel.
June 22, 2025
Within the first 25 pages of reading this book I was in tears. Murray’s writing is so lyrical and beautiful but imbued with such raw emotion that I was completely floored immediately. It begins heavy and stays there, because the themes and issues that are presented here are so vital, especially in these dark times. Child loss, partner abuse, sexual, and physical violence towards women with the respect and gravity that they deserve, but know going in if these are triggers.
This is a novel that contains a serial killer and very disturbing depictions of what he does to his victims. I think that we are somewhat, especially as a seasoned horror reader and watcher, not only desensitized to this violence, but it is one of the selling points of horror, how is the person going to be killed in some new and inventive way. I’m a huge slasher fan and I’m not knocking that but I’m just pointing it out to juxtapose what Murray does in this book that is so remarkable.
I absolutely dreaded the scenes of violence.
It was painful and horrible and felt so real. That is the point, and it is made perfectly. Victims are human beings and in remarkably short sections Murray makes you care for, fear for, and mourn these women. It is brutal and it is brilliant.
Birdie, is such a complex character and I had incredibly complex feelings about her. At times I felt such empathy, other times such anger, and finally so much sadness. She is an absolutely traumatized person that just wants connection and to feel loved and safe, but this world is not a loving or safe place and Birdie finds this out to heartbreaking results over and over again.
In the acknowledgments to the eARC that was given to me, Murray writes that she wants “to reach out to every person struggling with an abusive partner. You do not have to live like this. You deserve a better life. I know it’s hard but I believe in you.” She even writes that she will be “donating a portion of the proceeds from the sale of this book to charities that help victims of domestic violence for as long as it is in print.”
This is a novel that contains a serial killer and very disturbing depictions of what he does to his victims. I think that we are somewhat, especially as a seasoned horror reader and watcher, not only desensitized to this violence, but it is one of the selling points of horror, how is the person going to be killed in some new and inventive way. I’m a huge slasher fan and I’m not knocking that but I’m just pointing it out to juxtapose what Murray does in this book that is so remarkable.
I absolutely dreaded the scenes of violence.
It was painful and horrible and felt so real. That is the point, and it is made perfectly. Victims are human beings and in remarkably short sections Murray makes you care for, fear for, and mourn these women. It is brutal and it is brilliant.
Birdie, is such a complex character and I had incredibly complex feelings about her. At times I felt such empathy, other times such anger, and finally so much sadness. She is an absolutely traumatized person that just wants connection and to feel loved and safe, but this world is not a loving or safe place and Birdie finds this out to heartbreaking results over and over again.
In the acknowledgments to the eARC that was given to me, Murray writes that she wants “to reach out to every person struggling with an abusive partner. You do not have to live like this. You deserve a better life. I know it’s hard but I believe in you.” She even writes that she will be “donating a portion of the proceeds from the sale of this book to charities that help victims of domestic violence for as long as it is in print.”
September 10, 2025
“There is no panic, only a deep, aching sadness. A hollow mourning and a longing to be found. I miss a life I can’t remember, but I know there were people I loved and that they’re missing me already. Wondering why I haven’t come back.
Find me, I whisper in my broken mind, scattered across the leaves.
Find me.”
This book has just about every woman’s fears wrapped into various perspectives and characters across the story. The fear of being stalked and followed. The fear of being neglected and ignored. The fear of being found out for who you really are. The fear of never being found again to reveal another. Born of insecurities, reinforced by doubt, and rooted in grief, guilt, and loneliness, this is how small actions up through conditioned behaviors aid the reign of a serial killer in this book.
The emotional and physical suffering various women endure throughout is enraging. However, it is also sobering when some of their excuses and denials, I have also used, said, or thought. “Maybe I am being paranoid” deters a call to the police when you notice something off. “He didn’t really mean it” lowers the blinders back down so you can avoid a confrontation. “I just need to be there for her” delays the intervention you just don’t have the energy for right now. The agony, sadness, and reality of abusive cycles is captured so accurately and tragically in this book. It is the all too real basis for horrifying events that happen every day.
Murray’s writing is beautifully devastating. Definitely read the content warnings as it may have you rehashing memories and experiences. I could not put this book down and cannot wait to read more by Emma. This is one of my top reads of 2025.
Find me, I whisper in my broken mind, scattered across the leaves.
Find me.”
This book has just about every woman’s fears wrapped into various perspectives and characters across the story. The fear of being stalked and followed. The fear of being neglected and ignored. The fear of being found out for who you really are. The fear of never being found again to reveal another. Born of insecurities, reinforced by doubt, and rooted in grief, guilt, and loneliness, this is how small actions up through conditioned behaviors aid the reign of a serial killer in this book.
The emotional and physical suffering various women endure throughout is enraging. However, it is also sobering when some of their excuses and denials, I have also used, said, or thought. “Maybe I am being paranoid” deters a call to the police when you notice something off. “He didn’t really mean it” lowers the blinders back down so you can avoid a confrontation. “I just need to be there for her” delays the intervention you just don’t have the energy for right now. The agony, sadness, and reality of abusive cycles is captured so accurately and tragically in this book. It is the all too real basis for horrifying events that happen every day.
Murray’s writing is beautifully devastating. Definitely read the content warnings as it may have you rehashing memories and experiences. I could not put this book down and cannot wait to read more by Emma. This is one of my top reads of 2025.
August 11, 2025
🩸Buckle up...🩸
..... We're going to therapy after this one...
I knew this book was going to be dark, I just didn't know that it was going to wreck me in the end like it did. It's a punch to the gut, leaves you breathless, angry and helpless, upset for not being able to jump in the book and shake the MC to do better, choose better.
***I want to give people a trigger warning. Please look them up before reading this book as it includes acts of DV, suicide, gaslight, grief, mental abuse, murder and more.***
We follow Birdie, poor sweet and naive Birdie. She's been through the wringer, after the tragic loss of her son, she's still in the grieving in process, but as if that wasn't enough, she's got Russ, a POS man that she can't seem to be able to let go of. The POV in her daily life, her routine, and with the mental gymnastics she goes through to excuse the way that man treats her.
We also follow one of the most unique yet heartbreaking POV that I won't spoil for you. It’s heart-wrenching. Also, follow multiple victims' POV as well as nightstalker.
It's a dark, disturbing, enraging, and very well-balanced story of both horror and grief. Emma does an outstanding job in writing transgressive horror and highlighting the bad, the ugly, the ignored. Although it is fiction, this is close to a lot of people's lives. I will not be able to let go of this one for a long time.
If you're a LaRocca fan, I highly recommend this to you. This is my second book by Emma, and I look forward to reading way more from her!
I want to thank Emma for the e-book ARC and allowing me to read this heartbreaking story
..... We're going to therapy after this one...
I knew this book was going to be dark, I just didn't know that it was going to wreck me in the end like it did. It's a punch to the gut, leaves you breathless, angry and helpless, upset for not being able to jump in the book and shake the MC to do better, choose better.
***I want to give people a trigger warning. Please look them up before reading this book as it includes acts of DV, suicide, gaslight, grief, mental abuse, murder and more.***
We follow Birdie, poor sweet and naive Birdie. She's been through the wringer, after the tragic loss of her son, she's still in the grieving in process, but as if that wasn't enough, she's got Russ, a POS man that she can't seem to be able to let go of. The POV in her daily life, her routine, and with the mental gymnastics she goes through to excuse the way that man treats her.
We also follow one of the most unique yet heartbreaking POV that I won't spoil for you. It’s heart-wrenching. Also, follow multiple victims' POV as well as nightstalker.
It's a dark, disturbing, enraging, and very well-balanced story of both horror and grief. Emma does an outstanding job in writing transgressive horror and highlighting the bad, the ugly, the ignored. Although it is fiction, this is close to a lot of people's lives. I will not be able to let go of this one for a long time.
If you're a LaRocca fan, I highly recommend this to you. This is my second book by Emma, and I look forward to reading way more from her!
I want to thank Emma for the e-book ARC and allowing me to read this heartbreaking story
September 26, 2025
I feel like such a fool. I hate him. I love him. I miss him with him with my whole being.
Cycles of abuse. Cycles of trauma.
This book caught me off guard. In the backdrop, there is a killer, relentlessly preying on women, while we have our protagonist, Birdie, trying navigate her grief and guilt while navigating a manipulative, abusive relationship.
What struck me most as I continued through the several sections of this book was how...repetitive it became. Birdie's boyfriend, Russ, is manipulative and abusive, they make up. The killer strikes again. Birdie's boyfriend Russ is manipulative and abusive, they make up. The killer strikes again.
Each transgression more aggressive, but you never feel closer to the cycle breaking.
Then I realized that's probably the point.
The rhythm of abuse in the culture just overtakes everything. The horror is that it never seems to end. That you're stuck in it.
Even outside of her relationship, Birdie is denigrated in every way possible. Even worse than pitiful, the world constantly shames her. All the guilt and responsibility placed on her shoulders until she nearly loses herself in shame. Even when she tries to break out and do things to benefit herself, she gets crusehd
Then we arrive in the final segments of the book, and Murray catapults the narrative into a whole new anxiety inducing terrain that had me on edge until the end.
There's a lot to unpack here and a lot more to say. But a powerful read if you can stomach it.
Cycles of abuse. Cycles of trauma.
This book caught me off guard. In the backdrop, there is a killer, relentlessly preying on women, while we have our protagonist, Birdie, trying navigate her grief and guilt while navigating a manipulative, abusive relationship.
What struck me most as I continued through the several sections of this book was how...repetitive it became. Birdie's boyfriend, Russ, is manipulative and abusive, they make up. The killer strikes again. Birdie's boyfriend Russ is manipulative and abusive, they make up. The killer strikes again.
Each transgression more aggressive, but you never feel closer to the cycle breaking.
Then I realized that's probably the point.
The rhythm of abuse in the culture just overtakes everything. The horror is that it never seems to end. That you're stuck in it.
Even outside of her relationship, Birdie is denigrated in every way possible. Even worse than pitiful, the world constantly shames her. All the guilt and responsibility placed on her shoulders until she nearly loses herself in shame. Even when she tries to break out and do things to benefit herself, she gets crusehd
Then we arrive in the final segments of the book, and Murray catapults the narrative into a whole new anxiety inducing terrain that had me on edge until the end.
There's a lot to unpack here and a lot more to say. But a powerful read if you can stomach it.
June 27, 2025
REVIEW!!!
Shoot Me In The Face On A Beautiful Day
Out August 25!
In her second novel, Emma brings us another beautifully disturbing, yet entrancing story that is bound to wreck your soul in the best way. In SMITFOABD, three stories are beautifully woven together. We follow Birdie, wracked with grief over the death of her son and trapped in an unstable, abusive relationship. Then we follow a man on a murder spree, targeting women he views as helpless and alone. Among all of this are chapters from the perspective of a dead, decaying body waiting to be found.
The scenes following the killer and his female victims were the most gut-wrenching. It really highlights how unsafe women are and how their voices often go unheard. We really get inside of Birdie's head and feel the guilt and shame she feels. I went from completely sympathizing with her one chapter to being absolutely frustrated with her decisions the next, I don’t think I’ve ever loved and hated a character so much. The three stories are intertwined so well and really come together in the end.
The writing here is absolutely stunning. I don’t know how Emma’s prose can be so grotesque, yet poetic. Every sentence, every paragraph is so well written that it just sucks you further into its grasp the more you read. I honestly cannot recommend this book enough.
Final rating, a perfect 5/5. This is a must read!
Shoot Me In The Face On A Beautiful Day
Out August 25!
In her second novel, Emma brings us another beautifully disturbing, yet entrancing story that is bound to wreck your soul in the best way. In SMITFOABD, three stories are beautifully woven together. We follow Birdie, wracked with grief over the death of her son and trapped in an unstable, abusive relationship. Then we follow a man on a murder spree, targeting women he views as helpless and alone. Among all of this are chapters from the perspective of a dead, decaying body waiting to be found.
The scenes following the killer and his female victims were the most gut-wrenching. It really highlights how unsafe women are and how their voices often go unheard. We really get inside of Birdie's head and feel the guilt and shame she feels. I went from completely sympathizing with her one chapter to being absolutely frustrated with her decisions the next, I don’t think I’ve ever loved and hated a character so much. The three stories are intertwined so well and really come together in the end.
The writing here is absolutely stunning. I don’t know how Emma’s prose can be so grotesque, yet poetic. Every sentence, every paragraph is so well written that it just sucks you further into its grasp the more you read. I honestly cannot recommend this book enough.
Final rating, a perfect 5/5. This is a must read!
October 19, 2025
BWAF Score: 8/10
Curtain up, you miserable bastards. Let’s dissect this festering corpse of a book with the glee of a drunk coroner at a midnight autopsy.
Emma E. Murray, a name that sounds like it belongs on a dusty library card, is a relatively fresh face in the indie horror scene. Hailing from the gritty underbelly of small-press fiction, she’s got a knack for stories that claw at your insides. Her prior work includes short stories in obscure anthologies, with titles like “Teeth in the Mist” and “Bone Orchard” hinting at her penchant for visceral, psychological dread. This also follows her incredible collection of fucked up stories, The Drowning Machine from earlier this year. Published by Apocalypse Party, a press known for its unapologetic weirdness, Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day is her second novel. It’s a hell of a swing from a writer who’s clearly been simmering in the cauldron of human despair, and it shows. Murray’s not here to hold your hand; she’s here to rip your nails off.
Picture a small town where the air smells of pine and regret. Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day follows Birdie, a woman trapped in a toxic marriage with Russ, a man whose charm is as sharp as a rusty switchblade. Parallel to her unraveling life is a nameless corpse, narrating its own decomposition in a forest clearing, a grim Greek chorus watching the world rot. The novel weaves through seasons, from spring’s false hope to winter’s bleak surrender, as Birdie grapples with grief, love, and a creeping darkness that might be her husband… or something worse. It’s a horror story that doesn’t scream “boo” but whispers “you’re fucked” in your ear.
This book is a festering wound of themes: grief, abuse, and the slow death of self-worth. Murray structures the novel like a body’s decay (Fresh, Bloat, Putrefaction, Advanced Decay, Burial) each section mirroring both the corpse’s physical breakdown and Birdie’s emotional collapse. It’s a clever metaphor, if a bit on-the-nose, like a skull tattoo on a biker’s bicep. The corpse’s voice, pleading “Find me,” is a haunting refrain, symbolizing not just its own lost identity but Birdie’s desperate need for rescue from her own life. The woods, a recurring setting, are a primal void, both womb and grave, where secrets fester like maggots.
Murray’s prose is a jagged blade, raw and unpolished, yet dripping with vivid, nauseating detail. Passages about the corpse’s decay like, “liquid bubbles up and spills from my nostrils” are so tactile you’ll want to shower. Birdie’s sections, meanwhile, pulse with the claustrophobia of a woman caged by love and fear. The writing’s not perfect; it occasionally stumbles into melodrama, but it’s got guts. Murray’s style leans into the grotesque, with a rhythm that feels like a heartbeat under a butcher’s knife. It’s not Lovecraftian cosmic dread or King’s populist spookshow. Instead, it’s intimate, like a confession you wish you hadn’t heard.
This book is about what happens when love becomes a noose. Birdie’s devotion to Russ, despite his volatility, is a gut-wrenching portrait of how abuse distorts reality. The corpse’s narrative, meanwhile, forces you to confront mortality in a way that’s both poetic and revolting. It’s not just a body rotting; it’s a life erased, begging for meaning. Murray’s horror is in the slow, inevitable grind of despair. The implication, that we’re all complicit in our own destruction, hits like a sledgehammer. It’s a book that asks: How far will you go for love? And when does love become a grave you dig yourself?
The parallel narratives, corpse and Birdie, mirror each other in a way that’s both brilliant and brutal. The corpse’s detachment contrasts with Birdie’s raw emotion, creating a dissonance that’s deeply unsettling. It’s as if Murray’s saying, “This is what awaits us all—oblivion or agony, take your pick.” The book’s refusal to offer easy answers or redemption makes it linger like a bad dream. It’s horror that doesn’t just scare you; it makes you question why you’re still here.
Let’s get to the meat. Shoot Me in the Face is original as hell. The dual narrative, corpse and human, is a gamble that mostly pays off, giving the story a mythic weight. The decay structure is a stroke of genius, tying the physical to the emotional in a way that’s both grotesque and profound. Murray’s characters, especially Birdie, are painfully real. Her inner conflict of love versus survival is drawn with such nuance you’ll want to shake her and hug her at the same time. The prose, while occasionally overwrought, paints a vivid, stomach-churning picture. This is indie horror at its best: bold, weird, and unafraid to get messy.
The pacing drags in the middle, especially in the “Bloat” and “Putrefaction” sections, where Birdie’s repetitive domestic strife feels like a hamster wheel of misery. Some secondary characters (Juliana, Charlie) lack depth, serving more as plot devices. The horror, while atmospheric, isn’t consistently scary; it’s more dread-inducing than terrifying, which might disappoint some of you thrill-seekers out there. The corpse’s sections, while poetic, can feel like an artsy distraction from the main plot, especially when they lean into abstract philosophizing.
Is it scary? Not in the traditional sense—no monsters under the bed here. The fear comes from the human cost: the terror of being trapped, the horror of losing yourself. It’s psychological, not paranormal, and that’s its strength and its limit. If you want cheap scares, go watch a slasher flick. If you want to feel like your soul’s been skinned, this is your jam. This is a damn fine novel, dripping with atmosphere and gutsy prose. It’s a bold, original stab at horror that respects the genre’s weird edges. Murray’s got a future, and I’m fucking here for it.
TL;DR: Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day is a raw, gut-wrenching debut from Emma E. Murray, blending a corpse’s decay with a woman’s descent into abusive love. Its vivid prose and bold structure shine, despite pacing hiccups. A haunting, original horror tale that’s stunningly dreadful.
Recommended for: Anyone who’s ever stayed in a shitty relationship too long. If you dig books that make you feel like you’ve been punched in the heart, this one’s for you.
Not recommended for: Hopeless romantics who believe every toxic relationship ends with a sunset kiss, unless you’re cool with love stories that feel like a punch to the throat.
Curtain up, you miserable bastards. Let’s dissect this festering corpse of a book with the glee of a drunk coroner at a midnight autopsy.
Emma E. Murray, a name that sounds like it belongs on a dusty library card, is a relatively fresh face in the indie horror scene. Hailing from the gritty underbelly of small-press fiction, she’s got a knack for stories that claw at your insides. Her prior work includes short stories in obscure anthologies, with titles like “Teeth in the Mist” and “Bone Orchard” hinting at her penchant for visceral, psychological dread. This also follows her incredible collection of fucked up stories, The Drowning Machine from earlier this year. Published by Apocalypse Party, a press known for its unapologetic weirdness, Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day is her second novel. It’s a hell of a swing from a writer who’s clearly been simmering in the cauldron of human despair, and it shows. Murray’s not here to hold your hand; she’s here to rip your nails off.
Picture a small town where the air smells of pine and regret. Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day follows Birdie, a woman trapped in a toxic marriage with Russ, a man whose charm is as sharp as a rusty switchblade. Parallel to her unraveling life is a nameless corpse, narrating its own decomposition in a forest clearing, a grim Greek chorus watching the world rot. The novel weaves through seasons, from spring’s false hope to winter’s bleak surrender, as Birdie grapples with grief, love, and a creeping darkness that might be her husband… or something worse. It’s a horror story that doesn’t scream “boo” but whispers “you’re fucked” in your ear.
This book is a festering wound of themes: grief, abuse, and the slow death of self-worth. Murray structures the novel like a body’s decay (Fresh, Bloat, Putrefaction, Advanced Decay, Burial) each section mirroring both the corpse’s physical breakdown and Birdie’s emotional collapse. It’s a clever metaphor, if a bit on-the-nose, like a skull tattoo on a biker’s bicep. The corpse’s voice, pleading “Find me,” is a haunting refrain, symbolizing not just its own lost identity but Birdie’s desperate need for rescue from her own life. The woods, a recurring setting, are a primal void, both womb and grave, where secrets fester like maggots.
Murray’s prose is a jagged blade, raw and unpolished, yet dripping with vivid, nauseating detail. Passages about the corpse’s decay like, “liquid bubbles up and spills from my nostrils” are so tactile you’ll want to shower. Birdie’s sections, meanwhile, pulse with the claustrophobia of a woman caged by love and fear. The writing’s not perfect; it occasionally stumbles into melodrama, but it’s got guts. Murray’s style leans into the grotesque, with a rhythm that feels like a heartbeat under a butcher’s knife. It’s not Lovecraftian cosmic dread or King’s populist spookshow. Instead, it’s intimate, like a confession you wish you hadn’t heard.
This book is about what happens when love becomes a noose. Birdie’s devotion to Russ, despite his volatility, is a gut-wrenching portrait of how abuse distorts reality. The corpse’s narrative, meanwhile, forces you to confront mortality in a way that’s both poetic and revolting. It’s not just a body rotting; it’s a life erased, begging for meaning. Murray’s horror is in the slow, inevitable grind of despair. The implication, that we’re all complicit in our own destruction, hits like a sledgehammer. It’s a book that asks: How far will you go for love? And when does love become a grave you dig yourself?
The parallel narratives, corpse and Birdie, mirror each other in a way that’s both brilliant and brutal. The corpse’s detachment contrasts with Birdie’s raw emotion, creating a dissonance that’s deeply unsettling. It’s as if Murray’s saying, “This is what awaits us all—oblivion or agony, take your pick.” The book’s refusal to offer easy answers or redemption makes it linger like a bad dream. It’s horror that doesn’t just scare you; it makes you question why you’re still here.
Let’s get to the meat. Shoot Me in the Face is original as hell. The dual narrative, corpse and human, is a gamble that mostly pays off, giving the story a mythic weight. The decay structure is a stroke of genius, tying the physical to the emotional in a way that’s both grotesque and profound. Murray’s characters, especially Birdie, are painfully real. Her inner conflict of love versus survival is drawn with such nuance you’ll want to shake her and hug her at the same time. The prose, while occasionally overwrought, paints a vivid, stomach-churning picture. This is indie horror at its best: bold, weird, and unafraid to get messy.
The pacing drags in the middle, especially in the “Bloat” and “Putrefaction” sections, where Birdie’s repetitive domestic strife feels like a hamster wheel of misery. Some secondary characters (Juliana, Charlie) lack depth, serving more as plot devices. The horror, while atmospheric, isn’t consistently scary; it’s more dread-inducing than terrifying, which might disappoint some of you thrill-seekers out there. The corpse’s sections, while poetic, can feel like an artsy distraction from the main plot, especially when they lean into abstract philosophizing.
Is it scary? Not in the traditional sense—no monsters under the bed here. The fear comes from the human cost: the terror of being trapped, the horror of losing yourself. It’s psychological, not paranormal, and that’s its strength and its limit. If you want cheap scares, go watch a slasher flick. If you want to feel like your soul’s been skinned, this is your jam. This is a damn fine novel, dripping with atmosphere and gutsy prose. It’s a bold, original stab at horror that respects the genre’s weird edges. Murray’s got a future, and I’m fucking here for it.
TL;DR: Shoot Me in the Face on a Beautiful Day is a raw, gut-wrenching debut from Emma E. Murray, blending a corpse’s decay with a woman’s descent into abusive love. Its vivid prose and bold structure shine, despite pacing hiccups. A haunting, original horror tale that’s stunningly dreadful.
Recommended for: Anyone who’s ever stayed in a shitty relationship too long. If you dig books that make you feel like you’ve been punched in the heart, this one’s for you.
Not recommended for: Hopeless romantics who believe every toxic relationship ends with a sunset kiss, unless you’re cool with love stories that feel like a punch to the throat.
May 23, 2025
This is my third Emma E. Murray read in just three months, and it's safe to say I’ll read anything she writes. Her latest book is a raw and insightful portrayal of an abusive relationship, and as expected, it deals with some heavy themes. The toxicity throughout, combined with many POVs makes the story even more powerful and unsettling.
What added a unique twist was the layer involving a serial killer, which I thought was a powerful way to represent how blind a victim can be in an abusive relationship. Much like in Crushing Snails, the tension builds relentlessly - you can sense a disaster looming, but you're powerless to look away.
The MC, Birdie, is a deeply flawed character. We witness how she copes with a traumatic event by clinging to the kind of love she thinks she deserves.
“I never even texted him to tell him I was going somewhere other than straight home. He’s probably worried sick, wondering if I’m hurt somewhere, or worse, being unfaithful.”
Emma E. Murray is definitely an author to watch. I need to explore her short stories next. I believe this is her second full-length novel, and it's due out this summer. Thanks for letting me read this early!
What added a unique twist was the layer involving a serial killer, which I thought was a powerful way to represent how blind a victim can be in an abusive relationship. Much like in Crushing Snails, the tension builds relentlessly - you can sense a disaster looming, but you're powerless to look away.
The MC, Birdie, is a deeply flawed character. We witness how she copes with a traumatic event by clinging to the kind of love she thinks she deserves.
“I never even texted him to tell him I was going somewhere other than straight home. He’s probably worried sick, wondering if I’m hurt somewhere, or worse, being unfaithful.”
Emma E. Murray is definitely an author to watch. I need to explore her short stories next. I believe this is her second full-length novel, and it's due out this summer. Thanks for letting me read this early!
April 3, 2025
This woman was a mess. Because she blamed herself for her son’s death, she was willing to accept an abusive relationship. Russ was such a manipulative jerk. When he had a bad day, it was up to Birdie to find a way to fix him even if she had no idea what he was so depressed about. I felt she picked up on the red flags but because she hated herself so much she thought she deserved this type of life. Even with signs, tangible signs that Russ was displaying that he was no good, she banished the thoughts and kept on saying to herself, “he loves me, he loves me”. I guess that is why it is so difficult for DV victims have such a hard time leaving. There are so many variables that how is a woman (or man) supposed to know when to leave. The author did an excellent job of writing how powerless some women feel even to the point of doing something unthinkable. The final chapter of this book was so heartbreaking that I continued to think about Birdie long after I was finished.
June 28, 2025
"Shoot me in the face on a beautiful day" by Emma E. Murray is an astonishingly good book.
It explores the trauma of profound grief, of guilt, and of self loathing so deeply, that by the end all the painful decisions start to make a warped sense.
It is a heart wrenching read. Told from several points of view (the pov of the decomposing body is absolutely beautiful), we follow Birdie as she navigates a toxic abusive love, narcissism, a serial killer, and crushing grief.
We watch her slowly crumble under the weight of society, her partner, her own mind. And while she's barely keeping her head above water, women are stalked by a ruthless serial killer in the area.
The ending keeps you clutched by the throat as it takes you to unexpected places, and you don't really know how it ends exactly till the last paragraphs - it's nerve wrecking to say the least.
This is a book that'll stay with me for a long time... definitely highly recommended.
It explores the trauma of profound grief, of guilt, and of self loathing so deeply, that by the end all the painful decisions start to make a warped sense.
It is a heart wrenching read. Told from several points of view (the pov of the decomposing body is absolutely beautiful), we follow Birdie as she navigates a toxic abusive love, narcissism, a serial killer, and crushing grief.
We watch her slowly crumble under the weight of society, her partner, her own mind. And while she's barely keeping her head above water, women are stalked by a ruthless serial killer in the area.
The ending keeps you clutched by the throat as it takes you to unexpected places, and you don't really know how it ends exactly till the last paragraphs - it's nerve wrecking to say the least.
This is a book that'll stay with me for a long time... definitely highly recommended.
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