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The Veiled - Expanded edition: The Shilund Saga Book 1
Danger lurks in the dark woods that surround the small town of Presque Isle. Legends passed down from generation to generation, cautioned all to avoid the woods or risk losing your life. It was rumored that throughout the years, many who did not heed the warning went missing, right before the sighting of human like creatures, never to be heard of again. Jack dismissed the lure as the urban myths that accompany all small towns. Until on a camping trip with two of his friends, the unthinkable happens, leaving his friends dead and him imprisoned by a mysterious girl named Serena. Her strange eyes and stories of others of her kind intrigue him, leaving him defenseless to her. He discovers that his small town was nothing like he thought and that his life and those around him would be better than he could ever imagine, if he would only believe
168 pages, Paperback
First published October 5, 2014
3 people want to read
About the author
Jennifer Osborn
13 books30 followersWinner of the "Favorite YA Author" at the Queen of the West Book Bash, 2015.
Winner of the "Favorite Sci-Fi 'The Sentinel's Insurgency'", at the Queen of the West Book Bash, 2015.
Top 10 book for 2014, "The Veiled" by the website "What's beyond Forks".
The Dawning of Scarlett -- 2019 Winner of the Indie Author Project - Kentucky - sponsored by The Library Journal, Bibloboard, and Ingram Spark.
Winner of the "Favorite Sci-Fi 'The Sentinel's Insurgency'", at the Queen of the West Book Bash, 2015.
Top 10 book for 2014, "The Veiled" by the website "What's beyond Forks".
The Dawning of Scarlett -- 2019 Winner of the Indie Author Project - Kentucky - sponsored by The Library Journal, Bibloboard, and Ingram Spark.
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Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews
July 14, 2017
The "Twilight Saga Lookalike Syndrome" strikes again.
The Veiled: the Shilund Saga...conclusion: Decidedly eh.
I've read some great books that came out of Comic Con purchases. And I've read some bad ones. This one falls into the latter category. The pitch for this book was that it was about a strong female character. Still a romance, but instead of the prince saving the princess, the princess saves the prince. Kinda. You're half right.
The Veiled is a valiant attempt to recreate Bella Swan and Edward Cullen in their gender-bended forms. Add a dash of Native American folklore and hot-firefighter-clickbait and voila. You've got this thing.
The story itself was decent. As a concept, it's fairly interesting, and it did hold my attention, with some effort on my part, until the end of the book. I'll give it that. But that doesn't excuse the extremely inelegant prose, UTTER LACK of proofreading and editing (so many typos...), and the fact that so much of the book's details just makes no sense.
Allow me to explain.
This book suffers from an extremely bad case of ignoring the "show me, don't tell me" rule. A lot of this book is just stating what happens. The fight scene is somehow made boring at the end of the book (it's only two and a half pages long, while the Jackson-recovering-in-her-bedroom odyssey takes up the whopping first fifty) by only describing what happens. There's no energy. You can't feel like you're in there scrapping with the characters. I feel like I'm reading a report.
The book is also riddled with cliches. Cliches everywhere. My personal favorite is "...and everything went black." Man, if I had a dime for every time I read about things going black.
This book also makes a valiant attempt in putting in clever one-liners to spice up the characters' inner monologue. This is all well and good. Except for the fact that several scenes seem to be created around that specific one-liner, or they're inserted in really awkwardly just for the sake of having them in there. Such one-liners include "Calling EHarmony" in the middle of a police investigation, and (I kid you not) "Stockholm Syndrome, here I come" which really, is a phrase that should never be used in a book. Or anywhere else. Ever.
Overall, the prose is inelegant, suggesting a writer whose powers have not yet reached maturity. The typos are pretty self-explanatory, as a problem for a published book. Additionally, a mature writer would be able to weed out a lot of the things that don't make sense. A lot of it has to do with lack of worldbuilding (If the park service has seen these attacks for years, why haven't they done something about it yet? Why cover it up?) lack of character expansion (If Jackson is really close to his mom, why does he only call her once and then ignore her the rest of the book?) or just lack of analyzing "how would the other characters react in this situation?" Many times, when the narrator switches from Serena to Jackson or vice versa, the other person will talk and act how the narrating character (or rather, the demographic behind the character) wants them to or expects them to. For example, in the beginning, from Jackson's perspective, Serena is aloof and intimidating, when if it had been from her perspective, she would have been freaking out, both scared of him and what her people would do to her, not all shrouded and mysterious-y to look cool. Conversely, from Serena's perspective, Jackson becomes all hunky whenever it's her turn to tell the story, like it's turned into some popcorn romance paperback novel. The one thing that doesn't make sense though, and I can't get over, is Henry. Henry is a fantastic character. Once he was introduced, the story became twice as interesting, because here was a guy who had made the double life thing work, and could be the link for providing hope for Serena. His fight with Rahfey was awesome, the scorned long lost prince taking on his friend's enemy in single combat. *Cue dramatic music* But here's the problem: If he was best friends with Jack, why do we not hear about him at all until halfway through the book? And through the eyes of a completely unrelated character, no less? Why is he so insistent on suddenly solving all of Jackson and Serena's problems, to the point of literally fighting their final battle for them, besides plot convenience? I'd draw the line some point before that, dude. And for the love of God,
Henry is literally the coolest character in this book. Can I just have that instead of all the romance BS.
And it really is BS. Like I said above, I was pitched this on the premise that it had a strong female character. And yes, she saves him. And then proceeds to be guilty of everything that strong female characters don't do, while the writing ensures you that NO, SHE'S STILL A "STRONG FEMALE CHARACTER." BECAUSE WE SAID SO. DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU'RE ACTUALLY READING, IF WE SAY SHE'S A STRONG FEMALE CHARACTER SHE IS, BY GOD. These include A) Crying and moping because her boo left. B) Getting saved by said boo after her people are a-holes to her. A lot. C) Making her boo's best friend fight off her would-be fiance in ritual single combat. This last one is the kicker. If she was a "strong female character" she would have fought Rahfey herself. She's aaaall about independence and individuality. That's the reason they shunned her in the first place. And the fact that she could fight him WAS SPECIFICALLY STATED AS AN OPTION. But nah, bro. The guys can do this for her. White knight and everything to save her from the big bad controlling straight white male. Ooooh.
"But what about ??" you will ask. "Wasn't that strength to endure that? Surely that must make her a "strong female character?" Five isn't enough to make you pass out. Go read Throne of Glass and then we'll talk. Caelena Sardothien wore it better.
Who do I recommend it for? If you like Twilight Lookalikes...then here ya go. If not...eh.
Like I said. Decidedly eh.
The Veiled: the Shilund Saga...conclusion: Decidedly eh.
I've read some great books that came out of Comic Con purchases. And I've read some bad ones. This one falls into the latter category. The pitch for this book was that it was about a strong female character. Still a romance, but instead of the prince saving the princess, the princess saves the prince. Kinda. You're half right.
The Veiled is a valiant attempt to recreate Bella Swan and Edward Cullen in their gender-bended forms. Add a dash of Native American folklore and hot-firefighter-clickbait and voila. You've got this thing.
The story itself was decent. As a concept, it's fairly interesting, and it did hold my attention, with some effort on my part, until the end of the book. I'll give it that. But that doesn't excuse the extremely inelegant prose, UTTER LACK of proofreading and editing (so many typos...), and the fact that so much of the book's details just makes no sense.
Allow me to explain.
This book suffers from an extremely bad case of ignoring the "show me, don't tell me" rule. A lot of this book is just stating what happens. The fight scene is somehow made boring at the end of the book (it's only two and a half pages long, while the Jackson-recovering-in-her-bedroom odyssey takes up the whopping first fifty) by only describing what happens. There's no energy. You can't feel like you're in there scrapping with the characters. I feel like I'm reading a report.
The book is also riddled with cliches. Cliches everywhere. My personal favorite is "...and everything went black." Man, if I had a dime for every time I read about things going black.
This book also makes a valiant attempt in putting in clever one-liners to spice up the characters' inner monologue. This is all well and good. Except for the fact that several scenes seem to be created around that specific one-liner, or they're inserted in really awkwardly just for the sake of having them in there. Such one-liners include "Calling EHarmony" in the middle of a police investigation, and (I kid you not) "Stockholm Syndrome, here I come" which really, is a phrase that should never be used in a book. Or anywhere else. Ever.
Overall, the prose is inelegant, suggesting a writer whose powers have not yet reached maturity. The typos are pretty self-explanatory, as a problem for a published book. Additionally, a mature writer would be able to weed out a lot of the things that don't make sense. A lot of it has to do with lack of worldbuilding (If the park service has seen these attacks for years, why haven't they done something about it yet? Why cover it up?) lack of character expansion (If Jackson is really close to his mom, why does he only call her once and then ignore her the rest of the book?) or just lack of analyzing "how would the other characters react in this situation?" Many times, when the narrator switches from Serena to Jackson or vice versa, the other person will talk and act how the narrating character (or rather, the demographic behind the character) wants them to or expects them to. For example, in the beginning, from Jackson's perspective, Serena is aloof and intimidating, when if it had been from her perspective, she would have been freaking out, both scared of him and what her people would do to her, not all shrouded and mysterious-y to look cool. Conversely, from Serena's perspective, Jackson becomes all hunky whenever it's her turn to tell the story, like it's turned into some popcorn romance paperback novel. The one thing that doesn't make sense though, and I can't get over, is Henry. Henry is a fantastic character. Once he was introduced, the story became twice as interesting, because here was a guy who had made the double life thing work, and could be the link for providing hope for Serena. His fight with Rahfey was awesome, the scorned long lost prince taking on his friend's enemy in single combat. *Cue dramatic music* But here's the problem: If he was best friends with Jack, why do we not hear about him at all until halfway through the book? And through the eyes of a completely unrelated character, no less? Why is he so insistent on suddenly solving all of Jackson and Serena's problems, to the point of literally fighting their final battle for them, besides plot convenience? I'd draw the line some point before that, dude. And for the love of God,
Henry is literally the coolest character in this book. Can I just have that instead of all the romance BS.
And it really is BS. Like I said above, I was pitched this on the premise that it had a strong female character. And yes, she saves him. And then proceeds to be guilty of everything that strong female characters don't do, while the writing ensures you that NO, SHE'S STILL A "STRONG FEMALE CHARACTER." BECAUSE WE SAID SO. DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU'RE ACTUALLY READING, IF WE SAY SHE'S A STRONG FEMALE CHARACTER SHE IS, BY GOD. These include A) Crying and moping because her boo left. B) Getting saved by said boo after her people are a-holes to her. A lot. C) Making her boo's best friend fight off her would-be fiance in ritual single combat. This last one is the kicker. If she was a "strong female character" she would have fought Rahfey herself. She's aaaall about independence and individuality. That's the reason they shunned her in the first place. And the fact that she could fight him WAS SPECIFICALLY STATED AS AN OPTION. But nah, bro. The guys can do this for her. White knight and everything to save her from the big bad controlling straight white male. Ooooh.
"But what about ??" you will ask. "Wasn't that strength to endure that? Surely that must make her a "strong female character?" Five isn't enough to make you pass out. Go read Throne of Glass and then we'll talk. Caelena Sardothien wore it better.
Who do I recommend it for? If you like Twilight Lookalikes...then here ya go. If not...eh.
Like I said. Decidedly eh.
February 21, 2015
Full Review at: What's Beyond Forks?
The Veiled had action, romance, danger, and a touch of horror. I immediately connected with the characters. I could feel Serena's feelings of being an outsider and being okay with it yet longing to belong at the same time. She was easy to relate to. Jack was believable too. They have an instant attraction, but he's cautious of Serena and wasn't quick to trust her. He knew she wasn't human, but didn't know what a Shilund was either.
The Veiled by Jennifer Osborn was kindly provided to me by the author for review. The opinions are my own.
November 6, 2016
it was a good story, but i was very distracted by the editing (or lack of). i almost wanted to take a red pen to the book to fix the spelling and grammatical errors that riddled it. if you are not anal like me about those details then you would really enjoy this book. otherwise, just be aware and have your red pen ready.
January 6, 2015
Today I’m reviewing the first book in the Shilund Saga, The Veiled – Expanded Edition by Jennifer Osborn. It’s an urban fantasy with a strong romantic subplot involving a species of wolf-humanoids called the Shilund. Although interaction with humanity is forbidden, one of them bucks the rules she was born into and takes in a man who is seriously injured.
I give this book a 3.0/5. Here is my breakdown.
Characters: 4/5. I enjoyed the characters in this story very much. The late reveal of one of them was a complete surprise yet made total sense, and the interaction between the two main protagonists was realistic and fun. I didn’t understand the main villain much; he seemed a little cliché and stereotyped, but otherwise Osborn did a great job making interesting people.
Plot/Storyline: 4.5/5. This was a real strength of this novel. I really enjoyed the plot twists and the development of the world of the Shilund. Coupled with the strong characters, this made the book a very enjoyable read. I don’t want to give the story away, but I especially liked the romantic subplot (what can I say, I’m a sucker for romantic subplots) and the development of the Shilund tribal structure.
Flow: 4/5. Another high point. I was very pleased by the pacing and the speed the story pulled me through the book. Pages turned at a rapid pace with nary a boring moment. Well done!
Grammar/Spelling: 2/5. Ah. This was unfortunate. This is an example of a novel that is badly in need of another proofreader. There are misspelled words, misused words, missing commas and punctuation errors in many places. Often, I’ll say here “but it didn’t detract from the story,” but it did.
Overall: 3.0/5. Osborn has created a wonderful story and I look forward to the sequel. Please, bring this book in for another edit and make it into the high-level offering that your readers and your writing talents deserve!
I give this book a 3.0/5. Here is my breakdown.
Characters: 4/5. I enjoyed the characters in this story very much. The late reveal of one of them was a complete surprise yet made total sense, and the interaction between the two main protagonists was realistic and fun. I didn’t understand the main villain much; he seemed a little cliché and stereotyped, but otherwise Osborn did a great job making interesting people.
Plot/Storyline: 4.5/5. This was a real strength of this novel. I really enjoyed the plot twists and the development of the world of the Shilund. Coupled with the strong characters, this made the book a very enjoyable read. I don’t want to give the story away, but I especially liked the romantic subplot (what can I say, I’m a sucker for romantic subplots) and the development of the Shilund tribal structure.
Flow: 4/5. Another high point. I was very pleased by the pacing and the speed the story pulled me through the book. Pages turned at a rapid pace with nary a boring moment. Well done!
Grammar/Spelling: 2/5. Ah. This was unfortunate. This is an example of a novel that is badly in need of another proofreader. There are misspelled words, misused words, missing commas and punctuation errors in many places. Often, I’ll say here “but it didn’t detract from the story,” but it did.
Overall: 3.0/5. Osborn has created a wonderful story and I look forward to the sequel. Please, bring this book in for another edit and make it into the high-level offering that your readers and your writing talents deserve!
February 23, 2017
I read The Veiled. It is a fantastic novel. I like all the characters in this novel, but love Serena.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 27, 2016
By chance I walked past this author's booth at a convention and between the eye catching book cover, the authors vibrant energy and well, haha, the lure of a free book mark I wound up stopping and having a lovely conversation. I walked away from her booth with a word that I would return before leaving the convention to perhaps buy a book. Indeed I did, both of the ones she had for sale in fact! It was indeed a pleasure to meet her and I truly enjoyed this book indeed!
I would love to give this book 4 stars since it does indeed have so much potential! However the grammatical issues sadly were a bit much. When I write anything I struggle with grammar issues as I'm sure most people do, especially when you get on a creative roll, so I understand. I wish I could ignore all the errors but I think they could easily have been discovered since they jumped out at me as I was reading it for enjoyment and not even trying to proof read.
However, put that aside when you read and it's an enjoyable story! Is some of it cliche? Yes, but you know in nearly any book ever written you will find some cliche's living to varying degrees.
I could see and feel the characters pretty well, the pacing was good and kept me wanting to read on and learn more. I thought about the story/characters when I wasn't reading it, so that's always a good sign!
I a looking forward to reading more from this author and watching the growth and progression, lots of potential without a doubt and a wonderful woman as well!
I would love to give this book 4 stars since it does indeed have so much potential! However the grammatical issues sadly were a bit much. When I write anything I struggle with grammar issues as I'm sure most people do, especially when you get on a creative roll, so I understand. I wish I could ignore all the errors but I think they could easily have been discovered since they jumped out at me as I was reading it for enjoyment and not even trying to proof read.
However, put that aside when you read and it's an enjoyable story! Is some of it cliche? Yes, but you know in nearly any book ever written you will find some cliche's living to varying degrees.
I could see and feel the characters pretty well, the pacing was good and kept me wanting to read on and learn more. I thought about the story/characters when I wasn't reading it, so that's always a good sign!
I a looking forward to reading more from this author and watching the growth and progression, lots of potential without a doubt and a wonderful woman as well!
November 16, 2014
If you want to know what a Shilund is, than you must read this wonderful book.
I highly recommend this book.
I hope book 2 will follow soon.
I highly recommend this book.
I hope book 2 will follow soon.
Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews