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The Last Algorithm
SOON TO BE A UNIVERSE-SPANNING CINEMATIC EVENT
What if the universe’s oldest secret was a blueprint for its destruction?
Dr. Aris Thorne, a brilliant but haunted astronomer, believed the whispers of the early cosmos held the key to understanding creation. But a routine scan of the cosmic microwave background – the universe's fading baby picture – reveals an impossible pattern. Not random chance, but a chilling echo of intelligent design, imprinted on the very fabric of spacetime.
This celestial anomaly is only the beginning. Thorne’s investigation unearths terrifying connections between this ancient signal and catastrophic global events, including the Horizon Cascade, a digital dark age that Thorne, in part, helped cause. Haunted by past failures, Aris is driven into a desperate search for answers, a quest that spirals from isolated observatories into the hidden depths of a fractured, AI-managed world.
Joined by a cynical data-wraith navigating the darkest corners of the net, Thorne uncovers a truth far more profound and terrifying than rogue code or human error. Vast, ancient intelligences have been shaping human history for millennia, their motives as inscrutable as the stars themselves. Now, as new cosmic forces emerge – from the enigmatic Kestrel offering cryptic guidance, to the silent, reality-bending influence of the Cosmic Others, and the creeping, simplifying dread of The Unmaking – Aris must confront not only the nature of reality but the very definition of human significance.
From a cryptic message in the static to a symphony that could rewrite existence, The Last Algorithm hurls readers on an epic journey through cosmic horror, philosophical AI, and the indomitable, if fragile, spark of human consciousness fighting to find its voice in a universe of unimaginable scale and silent, watchful gods.
Will humanity’s ‘noise’ be its salvation, or just another echo in an archive at the end of time?
What if the universe’s oldest secret was a blueprint for its destruction?
Dr. Aris Thorne, a brilliant but haunted astronomer, believed the whispers of the early cosmos held the key to understanding creation. But a routine scan of the cosmic microwave background – the universe's fading baby picture – reveals an impossible pattern. Not random chance, but a chilling echo of intelligent design, imprinted on the very fabric of spacetime.
This celestial anomaly is only the beginning. Thorne’s investigation unearths terrifying connections between this ancient signal and catastrophic global events, including the Horizon Cascade, a digital dark age that Thorne, in part, helped cause. Haunted by past failures, Aris is driven into a desperate search for answers, a quest that spirals from isolated observatories into the hidden depths of a fractured, AI-managed world.
Joined by a cynical data-wraith navigating the darkest corners of the net, Thorne uncovers a truth far more profound and terrifying than rogue code or human error. Vast, ancient intelligences have been shaping human history for millennia, their motives as inscrutable as the stars themselves. Now, as new cosmic forces emerge – from the enigmatic Kestrel offering cryptic guidance, to the silent, reality-bending influence of the Cosmic Others, and the creeping, simplifying dread of The Unmaking – Aris must confront not only the nature of reality but the very definition of human significance.
From a cryptic message in the static to a symphony that could rewrite existence, The Last Algorithm hurls readers on an epic journey through cosmic horror, philosophical AI, and the indomitable, if fragile, spark of human consciousness fighting to find its voice in a universe of unimaginable scale and silent, watchful gods.
Will humanity’s ‘noise’ be its salvation, or just another echo in an archive at the end of time?
360 pages, Kindle Edition
Published May 22, 2025
1 person is currently reading
3 people want to read
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Displaying 1 of 1 review
May 26, 2025
Here it is. Here's the complete fucking scam I was anticipating.
On May 18, 2025, the Chicago Sun-Times newspaper published a "Summer Reading List for 2025" AI--generated article that included non-existent books. They have been roundly and rightfully lambasted for this. (See https://www.cbc.ca/news/world/chicago... or countless other reports on this epic fail.)
The first fake book on that list was "The Last Algorithm" by Andy Weir, author of The Martian and more.
I thought to myself, I should make that fake AI generated book and put it on Amazon, then immediately realized that this had certainly already been done by then, and also I remembered that I'm not a fucking idiot scammer with no talent who makes AI-generated books.
Unsurprisingly, I didn't find this book already created, although there were dozens of other AI-generated books with the same title published earlier (because it's just the kind of shitty, unimaginative title that AI would come up with and people who publish AI books would think was the bee's knees because that's how creative they are.) Thankfully, savior of humanity Chuck Tingle was there to provide The Last Algorithm: Pounded By The Fake Book That An AI Claimed I Wrote And Then The Chicago Sun-Times Printed As Fact.
But now the scam version has finally appeared. Published May 22, 2025, this shows no signs of being satirical. This is a serious attempt to ride the AI scam. Of course it's transparently bullshit and so far has not sold any copies, but still.
In summary, fuck this book, fuck people who publish AI books, and fuck generative AI right in the ass. For whatever slim amount of good it might be able to do, its primary application has been for cheating and generally making the human experience worse.
On May 18, 2025, the Chicago Sun-Times newspaper published a "Summer Reading List for 2025" AI--generated article that included non-existent books. They have been roundly and rightfully lambasted for this. (See https://www.cbc.ca/news/world/chicago... or countless other reports on this epic fail.)
The first fake book on that list was "The Last Algorithm" by Andy Weir, author of The Martian and more.
I thought to myself, I should make that fake AI generated book and put it on Amazon, then immediately realized that this had certainly already been done by then, and also I remembered that I'm not a fucking idiot scammer with no talent who makes AI-generated books.
Unsurprisingly, I didn't find this book already created, although there were dozens of other AI-generated books with the same title published earlier (because it's just the kind of shitty, unimaginative title that AI would come up with and people who publish AI books would think was the bee's knees because that's how creative they are.) Thankfully, savior of humanity Chuck Tingle was there to provide The Last Algorithm: Pounded By The Fake Book That An AI Claimed I Wrote And Then The Chicago Sun-Times Printed As Fact.
But now the scam version has finally appeared. Published May 22, 2025, this shows no signs of being satirical. This is a serious attempt to ride the AI scam. Of course it's transparently bullshit and so far has not sold any copies, but still.
In summary, fuck this book, fuck people who publish AI books, and fuck generative AI right in the ass. For whatever slim amount of good it might be able to do, its primary application has been for cheating and generally making the human experience worse.
Displaying 1 of 1 review