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The World of Reforged #3
Reclaimed: The World of Reforged, Book 3
Saba Vasili, a scholar of the astral sea, faces a harrowing an arcane device he designed has malfunctioned and an entire district of the city has been obliterated and a foreign dignitary has been killed. Charged with murder, Saba is incarcerated on the orders of Byrengrad's ruling council, the Triad.
Ambassador Luan Zek of the Rezwyn Empire is dispatched to take custody of the alleged murderer of his countryman. But seeing Saba's pathetic state, Zek questions whether Saba is truly guilty or only the Triad's scapegoat.
With Byrengrad's fate in the balance, Saba and Zek must uncover the truth behind the arcane catastrophe and stop the malfunctioning device that is jeopardizing the fabric of their whole world.
Contains mature themes.
Ambassador Luan Zek of the Rezwyn Empire is dispatched to take custody of the alleged murderer of his countryman. But seeing Saba's pathetic state, Zek questions whether Saba is truly guilty or only the Triad's scapegoat.
With Byrengrad's fate in the balance, Saba and Zek must uncover the truth behind the arcane catastrophe and stop the malfunctioning device that is jeopardizing the fabric of their whole world.
Contains mature themes.
Audible Audio
First published October 9, 2024
37 people are currently reading
1947 people want to read
About the author
Seth Haddon
7 books580 followersSeth Haddon is a queer Australian writer of fantasy. He is a video game designer and producer, has a degree in Ancient History, and previously worked with cats. Some of his previous adventures include exploring Pompeii with a famous archaeologist and being chased through a train station by a nun.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 163 reviews
September 2, 2024
(I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.)
At first, this had all the makings of a 4 or 5 star book. There was so much going on in the beginning that struck so many of my personal interests. I liked the story setup: both the gravity of the situation and Saba's conflicting emotions regarding it, especially his 'selfish' motivation that lead to the catastrophe at the heart of the book. I will go to bat for messy transgender characters any day of the week, and throughout the book Saba's inner turmoil regarding his body, sense of self, and his drive to change his body at the expense of everyone and anything else -- all tied up with his guilt, anger, grief and ambition -- was my favorite element by far. Even when it was painful and depressing to see him struggle with his body as a trans reader myself. His motivation was a great catalyst for the story and I was very interested in the mystery/investigation vibe the book opened with. And of course the size difference between him and the love interest was an immediate draw as well.
However. Despite Saba and Zek being interesting characters on their own, their romance struggled to captivate me. Which is hard to say, because they had some genuinely good moments throughout the book. But too many scenes came off as the author nudging them together rather than it feeling like an organic connection between the characters themselves. And too much of it felt rather juvenile, given the circumstances and the heavy tone introduced from the beginning, and the stakes at play.
For the remaining 2/3rds I frequently considered DNFing due to this loss of interest in the romance, but also because the plot itself lost its edge, with pacing and plot decisions that felt awkward, and even inconsistencies in the writing itself (one example: where characters were described as climbing out of a gig only to be inexplicably seated in it again a few pages later).
There were also several pet peeves prevalent: from an overabundance of winking, to numerous side characters acting way too invested in Saba and Zek's relationship, even when they were barely witness to it or weren't exactly friends to either of them. As well as the casual and frequent use of the word 'slut' to describe Saba's pretty normal feelings of desire. Which brings me into another issue regarding Saba's past experiences with sex, which is only briefly described towards the end of the book and really threw me for a loop, because of how casual his sex life apparently has been up to this point when so much of his anxiety is rooted around his body and how others gender it under every circumstance. Anxiety around sex and intimacy is a real and complex thing among some trans people, but his past experiences felt wildly overlooked and dissonant compared to where we meet him as a reader. I would have liked more insight into how he overcame these anxieties with previous encounters when his anxiety has such a major grip over him through the course of this book. Especially when it seems (by implication) he might've been having sex early in his transition, or even before it. It was either a missed opportunity to add further depth to Saba's complex feelings on sex, or a very huge contradiction, to write his past in this way. But with how briefly this point was glossed over, there wasn't enough to work with either way, and that makes me very sad.
Overall, I can't say I enjoyed this book outside the first 20% or so. But I appreciate Saba's character -- for his complexities and motivations and messy emotions. I appreciate the attempt made to tell an interesting trans story heavily focused on an unconventional means of transition. I appreciate that Zek had his own (perceived) bodily imperfections. And even though the execution didn't land its mark, and I'm not sure I would really recommend this book, I can at least walk away with these positives.
At first, this had all the makings of a 4 or 5 star book. There was so much going on in the beginning that struck so many of my personal interests. I liked the story setup: both the gravity of the situation and Saba's conflicting emotions regarding it, especially his 'selfish' motivation that lead to the catastrophe at the heart of the book. I will go to bat for messy transgender characters any day of the week, and throughout the book Saba's inner turmoil regarding his body, sense of self, and his drive to change his body at the expense of everyone and anything else -- all tied up with his guilt, anger, grief and ambition -- was my favorite element by far. Even when it was painful and depressing to see him struggle with his body as a trans reader myself. His motivation was a great catalyst for the story and I was very interested in the mystery/investigation vibe the book opened with. And of course the size difference between him and the love interest was an immediate draw as well.
However. Despite Saba and Zek being interesting characters on their own, their romance struggled to captivate me. Which is hard to say, because they had some genuinely good moments throughout the book. But too many scenes came off as the author nudging them together rather than it feeling like an organic connection between the characters themselves. And too much of it felt rather juvenile, given the circumstances and the heavy tone introduced from the beginning, and the stakes at play.
For the remaining 2/3rds I frequently considered DNFing due to this loss of interest in the romance, but also because the plot itself lost its edge, with pacing and plot decisions that felt awkward, and even inconsistencies in the writing itself (one example: where characters were described as climbing out of a gig only to be inexplicably seated in it again a few pages later).
There were also several pet peeves prevalent: from an overabundance of winking, to numerous side characters acting way too invested in Saba and Zek's relationship, even when they were barely witness to it or weren't exactly friends to either of them. As well as the casual and frequent use of the word 'slut' to describe Saba's pretty normal feelings of desire. Which brings me into another issue regarding Saba's past experiences with sex, which is only briefly described towards the end of the book and really threw me for a loop, because of how casual his sex life apparently has been up to this point when so much of his anxiety is rooted around his body and how others gender it under every circumstance. Anxiety around sex and intimacy is a real and complex thing among some trans people, but his past experiences felt wildly overlooked and dissonant compared to where we meet him as a reader. I would have liked more insight into how he overcame these anxieties with previous encounters when his anxiety has such a major grip over him through the course of this book. Especially when it seems (by implication) he might've been having sex early in his transition, or even before it. It was either a missed opportunity to add further depth to Saba's complex feelings on sex, or a very huge contradiction, to write his past in this way. But with how briefly this point was glossed over, there wasn't enough to work with either way, and that makes me very sad.
Overall, I can't say I enjoyed this book outside the first 20% or so. But I appreciate Saba's character -- for his complexities and motivations and messy emotions. I appreciate the attempt made to tell an interesting trans story heavily focused on an unconventional means of transition. I appreciate that Zek had his own (perceived) bodily imperfections. And even though the execution didn't land its mark, and I'm not sure I would really recommend this book, I can at least walk away with these positives.
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March 18, 2024HOLY SHITTTTT!!! the cover is sooooo ajswytebsudnfkdpsey the scars, the kiss with the eyes closed — julie dillon you will always be famous <333
November 8, 2024
4.5 stars. As a work of metaphysical fantasy, this was fantastic. Probably my favourite in the trilogy, and one of the most thought-provoking fantasies I've read in a while. But it barely counts a romance, so I think if you've gotten excited by the excellent cover, you'll find yourself disappointed.
At it's core, this is a story about a trans masc character whose otherness has shaped his whole life and in fact threatens to unmake the whole world. Saba, our protagonist, is one of the most interesting and complex and frustrating characters I have ever read about. He is a scholar, and a refugee who fled his home country after being invaded by the Rezwyn Empire. In his new home, he develops an obsession with accessing the metaphysical 'astral sea', a concept we've seen in previous books, the place where all magical power is derived from. His obsession is partly driven by his desire to change his form into something that aligns with his inner self. So he creates this device that allows him to pierce the veil, but through a series of events that we are at first unaware of, this device ends up destroying part of the city and Saba ends up in jail. There he meets the Rezwyn ambassador, Luan Zek, a character we met in the last book. A Rezwyn noble was killed in the event, and Zek is tasked with investigating it. There's some like nascent attraction between the two, but it is ultra, ultra slow burn with literally zero action until like the last 5%. Zek serves more as a safe space for Saba, a way to see himself differently. The story is very much about Saba and his self-loathing and internal struggle. He is brilliant, and a little tragic. And in the course of the story he slow comes to grips with his material reality.
The other big aspect of this book was its commentary on empire and the horrors of imperial expansion, which is a particularly relevant topic at this point in history. Saba is attracted to someone who is ostensibly his enemy, someone who helped colonize and destroy his country. There's a tension there that was pretty well done. The book also makes you think a little about refugees and their struggles, being stateless but also unwelcome wherever they end up.
I really enjoyed this book. I had moments of frustration with Saba's kind of endless introspection, but it's a good story. Sweeping and compelling. The first half actually reads like a mystery, with Saba and Zek trying to find out what happened with the device and who was involved. This has been a great series, and I'm looking forward to whatever Haddon does next.
At it's core, this is a story about a trans masc character whose otherness has shaped his whole life and in fact threatens to unmake the whole world. Saba, our protagonist, is one of the most interesting and complex and frustrating characters I have ever read about. He is a scholar, and a refugee who fled his home country after being invaded by the Rezwyn Empire. In his new home, he develops an obsession with accessing the metaphysical 'astral sea', a concept we've seen in previous books, the place where all magical power is derived from. His obsession is partly driven by his desire to change his form into something that aligns with his inner self. So he creates this device that allows him to pierce the veil, but through a series of events that we are at first unaware of, this device ends up destroying part of the city and Saba ends up in jail. There he meets the Rezwyn ambassador, Luan Zek, a character we met in the last book. A Rezwyn noble was killed in the event, and Zek is tasked with investigating it. There's some like nascent attraction between the two, but it is ultra, ultra slow burn with literally zero action until like the last 5%. Zek serves more as a safe space for Saba, a way to see himself differently. The story is very much about Saba and his self-loathing and internal struggle. He is brilliant, and a little tragic. And in the course of the story he slow comes to grips with his material reality.
The other big aspect of this book was its commentary on empire and the horrors of imperial expansion, which is a particularly relevant topic at this point in history. Saba is attracted to someone who is ostensibly his enemy, someone who helped colonize and destroy his country. There's a tension there that was pretty well done. The book also makes you think a little about refugees and their struggles, being stateless but also unwelcome wherever they end up.
I really enjoyed this book. I had moments of frustration with Saba's kind of endless introspection, but it's a good story. Sweeping and compelling. The first half actually reads like a mystery, with Saba and Zek trying to find out what happened with the device and who was involved. This has been a great series, and I'm looking forward to whatever Haddon does next.
Want to read
March 18, 2024th-the scars. this means so much for me. omg, octuber hurry up!!!!!!!!!
September 3, 2024
Seth Haddon doesn't disappoint as Reclaimed continues to expand on the world he first brought to life in his debut novel Reforged.
At its core, this is a story of self-discovery and acceptance. The budding romance between Saba and Zek is sweet, but it falls into the background when faced with the enormity of Saba’s tangled web of secrets getting knotted up in arcane disasters and you know - the world possibly being torn apart by the very device that he created (All VERY VALID reasons for romance to take the back burner!). Still, the relationship that remains true and at the heart of this whole book is Saba’s relationship to himself and I appreciated that greatly.
This story is told entirely through Saba’s voice. I’m usually a fan of single POV, but I felt some disconnect with Saba’s personality here and there. In all fairness, Saba himself seemed to be experiencing a similar disconnect so I don’t fault this entirely on the writing.
Something Haddon excels at and continues to captivate me with is his ability to remind us that these characters are players in a much larger and startlingly more complex world that he has erected - yet we care for them and their version/perception of their world just as much as the last. Seeing the same world from numerous perspectives, backgrounds, and belief systems has been fascinating.
Now, I think I remained very professional throughout this review. So please excuse me for a moment while I… LUAN ZEK I WOULD LAY DOWN MY LIFE FOR YOU I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!
Man, I just really love this book. And I really want a print out of the map so I can frame it in my library - pls, I beg, tell me how to get a map print!?
Special thanks to Seth Haddon, Blind Eye Books and Book Sirens for the arc of this read! I am leaving this review voluntarily!
At its core, this is a story of self-discovery and acceptance. The budding romance between Saba and Zek is sweet, but it falls into the background when faced with the enormity of Saba’s tangled web of secrets getting knotted up in arcane disasters and you know - the world possibly being torn apart by the very device that he created (All VERY VALID reasons for romance to take the back burner!). Still, the relationship that remains true and at the heart of this whole book is Saba’s relationship to himself and I appreciated that greatly.
This story is told entirely through Saba’s voice. I’m usually a fan of single POV, but I felt some disconnect with Saba’s personality here and there. In all fairness, Saba himself seemed to be experiencing a similar disconnect so I don’t fault this entirely on the writing.
Something Haddon excels at and continues to captivate me with is his ability to remind us that these characters are players in a much larger and startlingly more complex world that he has erected - yet we care for them and their version/perception of their world just as much as the last. Seeing the same world from numerous perspectives, backgrounds, and belief systems has been fascinating.
Now, I think I remained very professional throughout this review. So please excuse me for a moment while I… LUAN ZEK I WOULD LAY DOWN MY LIFE FOR YOU I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!
Man, I just really love this book. And I really want a print out of the map so I can frame it in my library - pls, I beg, tell me how to get a map print!?
Special thanks to Seth Haddon, Blind Eye Books and Book Sirens for the arc of this read! I am leaving this review voluntarily!
October 2, 2024
Reclaimed is the third book set in a shared world series, although I had no trouble jumping into this one. I really loved the blend of a mystery to solve set in a high fantasy world. Add in a slow burn romance with your peoples’ enemy, and a lot of feels - I was hooked!
I love Saba and his journey, both to clear his name and also his continued struggle with his own body and positive self image. It’s so well done and emotional, as he works to love his body and who he currently is while understanding his past.
Also! I adore Zek. I wish we had a chapter or two from his POV, but Seth did a great job still conveying the yearning he clearly had for Saba. He’s a bit of a golden retriever and I love him.
I also enjoyed the side characters, so grumpy/sunshine!
This book includes mm/trans relationship rep, queer rep, disability rep, and a delicious slow burn with lots of yearning.
I received a copy of this book for an instagram tour. My thoughts are my own.
I love Saba and his journey, both to clear his name and also his continued struggle with his own body and positive self image. It’s so well done and emotional, as he works to love his body and who he currently is while understanding his past.
Also! I adore Zek. I wish we had a chapter or two from his POV, but Seth did a great job still conveying the yearning he clearly had for Saba. He’s a bit of a golden retriever and I love him.
I also enjoyed the side characters, so grumpy/sunshine!
This book includes mm/trans relationship rep, queer rep, disability rep, and a delicious slow burn with lots of yearning.
I received a copy of this book for an instagram tour. My thoughts are my own.
October 15, 2024
I'm in the middle of a depressive episode so I'm not sure I can come up with a proper review at the moment but yeah... I loved the book, and while the romance develops fairly quickly I was surprisingly not bothered at all by it.
July 16, 2025
This book was slow, and I wasn't that into the romance at first. I could see its potential, but I wasn't really feeling the chemistry. Until the leg massage scene. The tension was delicious, and that was when I started thinking, "Ooh I can't wait for them to kiss!" And I don't think it's a spoiler to say they eventually did kiss. And more! This author knows how to write a good sex scene.
I also enjoyed the trans and disability rep! The main character is a trans man, and this book portrayed gender dysphoria in such a strong, in-depth way, but a way that still felt so naturally woven into the story. And even with all the dysphoria, it managed to feel overall very body positive. And the love interest is strong fat (it's also nice to see some body diversity) with a bad leg and uses a cane.
I feel like there wasn't a lot of plot, it seemed like it was mostly talking and thinking, though I guess there was a bit of mystery-solving in there too.
This was about different characters than the previous books. I've read those too, but I don't think they're required to understand this one.
The audiobook narration by Gary Furlong was great. I don't know what accents he was doing, I'm not sure he knows what accents he was doing, they seemed to change a bit sometimes 😅 I just found it kinda funny, but I enjoyed them, whatever they were. (To be fair, these characters are from fictional countries.) Gary Furlong is genuinely a great narrator (I've listened to other books by him as well), and he sounded natural and emotional and brought the characters to life and made them sound distinct.
That's pretty much my thoughts about the book. It was slow, but the romance and rep were worth it! I enjoyed it.
*Rating: 3.5 Stars // Read Date: 2025 // Format: Audiobook*
Recommended For:
Anyone who likes slower stories, trans and disability rep, explorations of gender dysphoria, and slow-building but eventually sexy m/m romance.
Original Review @ Metaphors and Moonlight
I also enjoyed the trans and disability rep! The main character is a trans man, and this book portrayed gender dysphoria in such a strong, in-depth way, but a way that still felt so naturally woven into the story. And even with all the dysphoria, it managed to feel overall very body positive. And the love interest is strong fat (it's also nice to see some body diversity) with a bad leg and uses a cane.
I feel like there wasn't a lot of plot, it seemed like it was mostly talking and thinking, though I guess there was a bit of mystery-solving in there too.
This was about different characters than the previous books. I've read those too, but I don't think they're required to understand this one.
The audiobook narration by Gary Furlong was great. I don't know what accents he was doing, I'm not sure he knows what accents he was doing, they seemed to change a bit sometimes 😅 I just found it kinda funny, but I enjoyed them, whatever they were. (To be fair, these characters are from fictional countries.) Gary Furlong is genuinely a great narrator (I've listened to other books by him as well), and he sounded natural and emotional and brought the characters to life and made them sound distinct.
That's pretty much my thoughts about the book. It was slow, but the romance and rep were worth it! I enjoyed it.
*Rating: 3.5 Stars // Read Date: 2025 // Format: Audiobook*
Recommended For:
Anyone who likes slower stories, trans and disability rep, explorations of gender dysphoria, and slow-building but eventually sexy m/m romance.
Original Review @ Metaphors and Moonlight
October 14, 2024
I. Love. This. Book. More specifically, I love Saba. He is a feral bundle of conviction and emotion that deeply resonates with me as a trans man. Haddon depicts the complicated relationship Saba has with his present and past self beautifully. While every man's transition is his own, I think this book does justice to Saba's journey.
Reclaimed's romance had me leaning forward in my seat. Saba and Zek feel warm and familiar to me. I'm a pretty smallish trans man whose partner is big and soft, so I found joy in the parallels to my own experience. I flew through this book because I *needed* to see how they turned out in the end. Saba and Zek are a bit of a slow burn, but when that spark ignites...I'll just say I was fanning myself. I'm not sure where the story goes from here, but I would absolutely welcome more of this lovely couple.
Reclaimed also stands out as a fantasy. The worldbuilding is solid and felt welcoming even without the context of the previous two books set in the same world. I read Reborn a while back and I appreciate that this book stands well on its own. I also love me some political intrigue, and was delighted to find no shortage of shadowy conspiracy in this book.
I'm very grateful for the chance to check this book out for free, although I bought my own copy as soon as I could. I'm leaving this review of my own accord.
Reclaimed's romance had me leaning forward in my seat. Saba and Zek feel warm and familiar to me. I'm a pretty smallish trans man whose partner is big and soft, so I found joy in the parallels to my own experience. I flew through this book because I *needed* to see how they turned out in the end. Saba and Zek are a bit of a slow burn, but when that spark ignites...I'll just say I was fanning myself. I'm not sure where the story goes from here, but I would absolutely welcome more of this lovely couple.
Reclaimed also stands out as a fantasy. The worldbuilding is solid and felt welcoming even without the context of the previous two books set in the same world. I read Reborn a while back and I appreciate that this book stands well on its own. I also love me some political intrigue, and was delighted to find no shortage of shadowy conspiracy in this book.
I'm very grateful for the chance to check this book out for free, although I bought my own copy as soon as I could. I'm leaving this review of my own accord.
August 9, 2024
Thank you BookSirens for the ARC!
After reading Reborn I was curious to see where Haddon would take us next in the world he created.
To stay on topic, the world he has created is great. You can feel Haddon’s love for it in every word. You feel like you are entering another world every time you open the kindle app. While I’m still not navigating confidently in this new world and every time we are introduced to a new culture/country within it, I’m overwhelmed all over again, but I really enjoyed reading and learning about the world Haddon’s created!
Furthermore, I do think Haddon did an amazing job depicting self-hatred in this book. There were some genuinely powerful paragraphs and sentences that I marked and paused to take in. Those moments were exceptionally well done.
Examp. Zek, I so often want to take the skin from my back and open up my ribs and rip the very core of me free just so I don’t have to bear this body. Zek, if I could give half my life for the body I crave, I would do it in a heartbeat. Zek, there’s a part of me that almost does not care what’s happened to Byrengrad if it means I have even half a chance to crawl into the astral sea and remake my whole body as fully male.
Examp. There has almost always been a caveat. I am attractive in certain lighting. I am attractive until I take my clothes off. I am attractive when someone is desperate, or until they realize what I have or what I lack in the way of appendages. Or worse: I am attractive because I am unique. I am attractive for all the things I dislike about myself.
Also, Saba’s body dysmorphia due to his trans identity and how some of it mirrored Zek’s struggles with his leg were one of my favorite conversations. They offered a new perspective that I was gladly taking in.
Saba and Zek’s relationship falls under the slowburn umbrella, which I appreciated as I am an avid enjoyer of them. They had quite a few moments (of tenderness) that I found to be cute/sweet.
Despite the many positive aspects of the book, there were quite a few things that bugged me. Like the lack of urgency. At first we meet Saba in prison and he’s on the verge of being sentenced to death (:O!) but then he is released and we follow him around to uncover who was really behind The Incident. That really slowed things down as suddenly there was no more impending trial or death sentence up ahead. Therefore, Saba could spend his time dilly dallying around and playing dress-up and whatnot.
The who-done-it part of the book fell short as well. While we do spend a large portion of the story trying to figure out who’s behind that awful massacre, it doesn’t really feel like a mystery. There aren’t many suspects to choose from and I could guess what happened before I even reached the halfway point. This coupled with the lack of urgency brought the slow built-up to a halt for me.
This book is only told through Saba’s POV only which was a surprise to me after Reborn and not necessarily a welcomed change. While I do enjoy single POV in books, I felt trapped with Saba in this one. Saba's character felt exhausting at times, especially in the beginning. He seemed to be trying too hard to fit the badass sassy archetype, which didn't quite align with the gravity of his situation—being questioned for a mass murder by his own brother and facing possible execution(!). This made it difficult for me to connect with him.
Also his “I was a good boy” and his inner monologue about being someone’s dog and calling himself a slut etc. just was really pulling me out of the book.
Examp. “Oh, I’ll be such a good boy for you, Sir Zek,” he spat. “And if not, you can put a leash on me. Walk me into Doskor like a dog—I’m sure the emperor would love to see a Ker on their knees.”
Examp. “And the only thing he could think was: You inconsistent little slut.”
Examp. Saba looked to Zek like a dog might its master, because apparently that’s what Saba was becoming.
Examp. Really? On your knees immediately? Don’t you dare look up, you slut. Nothing good can come from looking up at shirtless Zek from this angle—
The complicated relationship with his brother was also lacking. I was hoping for a heart wrenching story but what I thought to be an appetizer for what’s to come apparently was the whole menu? Maksid is literally turning into his enemy right in front of Saba’s eyes and later confessing [spoiler! his betrayal and involvement in the incident] and somehow it is less important than Saba being gifted fancy clothes by his love interest.
Later in the book we get a confrontation between Saba and Maksid, where the latter voices his frustration/anger about his brother’s transition and I felt like the conversation lacked a bit of nuance and was very one-sided and rushed. It could have been genuinely interesting since Maksid isn’t just a transphobe who is hating on his little brother but the first born of a royal family who grew up in a matriarchy where he wasn’t a viable heir due to his gender. And then his sister reveals he’s a boy too and still gets the throne… I don’t know, I guess it wasn’t the kind of story this book was trying to tell or even focusing on, but I would’ve found it an interesting topic to discuss.
The book ends with Saba being recognized as the prince/king of Kerinsk and while I was happy for Saba, I also felt… unsatisfied? Saba rarely talked about his royal status. Sure, we got that reveal about him being the “long lost princess” but that was more about his trans identity than about him wanting to rule anything. He was shown to be hot headed, undiplomatic, selfish, and rude. The only time we hear about his thoughts about ruling was when he was miserable about being called “princess” and being forced into a title that he didn’t want. Not really great qualities for a future ruler. All the better if we would’ve seen him grow into a great ruler.
To jump back to our protagonist; Saba's “woe is me” act was at times super exhausting. Sure, he was framed for something he didn’t do and has a lot of trauma but he really had to jump at everybody’s throat and CLAIM all the guilt of the world. We get it, somebody gives this boy a medal so we can move on.
Examp. “You relinquished your citizenship, but you claim our grief? You don’t get to do that.”
The scale of the massacre also didn’t seem as great as it should’ve been. We never learn anything about the victims. Saba’s guilt was a great starting point but shouldn’t have ended there. Who were these people? It all felt very removed and I wish we would’ve sat down and actually taken a page or two to really give us a moment to grief these lost lives.
Aside from Saba, I felt the other characters weren't as well fleshed out. I’m more of a characters-over-plot kind of reader so that annoyed me a lot. Moss -- Saba’s best friend -- is the typical innocent girl archetype. Her unwavering belief in Saba's innocence, despite the lack of evidence, felt unconvincing. We didn’t really get much bonding time between them and from the start it was made clear that Moss was “too sweet for her own good” and “too good” and “naive” etc.
Examp. “Mossinne, don’t be naïve,” the sentinel said, because he was an asshole. “He stands accused of a massacre.” But this didn’t sway Moss either.
The romance between Moss and the female paladin happened too quickly with absolutely no build-up. We met Moss, we met the female paladin, they glanced at each other thrice, they kissed. They didn’t really add anything to this story plot-wise or character-wise. I thought we’d be going somewhere when Moss mentioned that their romance was sort of “forbidden” but… we didn’t.
To stay with the romance aspect of the story, the romance between Saba and Zek didn’t pull me in, either. There were cute and tender moments, yes, but not enough to make me root for the couple or be truly invested. Despite the slowburn, the constant horniness of Saba was exhausting to read. He is standing in front of the Eye that literally killed his people and he’s like “Zek, tell them I’ve been a good boy” like ??? It’s just who Saba is and while I do love myself a good silly character moment but he *always* has something cheeky, flirty, or some innuendo to say when it’s REALLY not appropriate and I just want to shake him and scream “READ THE ROOM”.
That coupled with the fact that Zek remained pretty bleak to me for the most part. Sure, I did like the self-acceptance part of the book a lot and I enjoyed his calm nature but it always felt like there was a barrier we didn’t cross. A thin curtain keeping us from truly connecting with him (us being me).
And this book was obsessed with reminding us that Zek was -- in fact -- fat. Like, every other page when Zek moved the floor creaked, the chair groaned, the stairs collapsed, the world shook… WE GET IT. I’m super down for more body variety in books - this just felt so excessive and unnecessary.
That brings me to my next point: Meeting God. I’m a bit on the fence about this one. While I do enjoy the body positivity in this book and the serious talk about accepting who you are and appreciating your body etc. If I had the chance to literally wake up in the perfect body… I’m sorry if that makes me a bad person but I’d take it. Saba’s goal for the entire book was to create a device that would make it possible for him to morph himself into that perfect body. And then he has a talk with this God-like thing and suddenly he’s like “you know what? nevermind!” He built a device that literally killed people…
Examp. Saba laughed. It was the first time in his life he’d ever been grateful to be born the way he had. But he also laughed at the irony. If he hadn’t been dissatisfied with who he was, he wouldn’t have dreamed of entering the astral sea in the first place.
And maybe I’m just getting it wrong, butt he next part confused me. Saba asked “God” why it created him like this (in a female body) instead of just giving him his “real” body from the start. And the explanation was very… confusing? Basically, “God” said that if they had given Saba his “right” body he would’ve never been trans, never injected himself with testo (and some fancy abyss magic stuff) and never created the device to meet “God”. And while I understand that I don’t understand why he even had to do that. Like, it ended with him keeping his body and returning to the world and that’s it… I guess there was some finding out about where the gjfdjf first landed or something but… idk it felt very pointless.
To wrap this up: I really enjoyed a lot of different aspects of this book (e.g. the writing, the worldbuilding, the sad parts, etc.) though not enough to outweigh the things that bugged me.
I recommend this book to everyone who wants a book with a beautiful worldbuilding, with a morally grey main character, and a slowburn romance.
After reading Reborn I was curious to see where Haddon would take us next in the world he created.
To stay on topic, the world he has created is great. You can feel Haddon’s love for it in every word. You feel like you are entering another world every time you open the kindle app. While I’m still not navigating confidently in this new world and every time we are introduced to a new culture/country within it, I’m overwhelmed all over again, but I really enjoyed reading and learning about the world Haddon’s created!
Furthermore, I do think Haddon did an amazing job depicting self-hatred in this book. There were some genuinely powerful paragraphs and sentences that I marked and paused to take in. Those moments were exceptionally well done.
Examp. Zek, I so often want to take the skin from my back and open up my ribs and rip the very core of me free just so I don’t have to bear this body. Zek, if I could give half my life for the body I crave, I would do it in a heartbeat. Zek, there’s a part of me that almost does not care what’s happened to Byrengrad if it means I have even half a chance to crawl into the astral sea and remake my whole body as fully male.
Examp. There has almost always been a caveat. I am attractive in certain lighting. I am attractive until I take my clothes off. I am attractive when someone is desperate, or until they realize what I have or what I lack in the way of appendages. Or worse: I am attractive because I am unique. I am attractive for all the things I dislike about myself.
Also, Saba’s body dysmorphia due to his trans identity and how some of it mirrored Zek’s struggles with his leg were one of my favorite conversations. They offered a new perspective that I was gladly taking in.
Saba and Zek’s relationship falls under the slowburn umbrella, which I appreciated as I am an avid enjoyer of them. They had quite a few moments (of tenderness) that I found to be cute/sweet.
Despite the many positive aspects of the book, there were quite a few things that bugged me. Like the lack of urgency. At first we meet Saba in prison and he’s on the verge of being sentenced to death (:O!) but then he is released and we follow him around to uncover who was really behind The Incident. That really slowed things down as suddenly there was no more impending trial or death sentence up ahead. Therefore, Saba could spend his time dilly dallying around and playing dress-up and whatnot.
The who-done-it part of the book fell short as well. While we do spend a large portion of the story trying to figure out who’s behind that awful massacre, it doesn’t really feel like a mystery. There aren’t many suspects to choose from and I could guess what happened before I even reached the halfway point. This coupled with the lack of urgency brought the slow built-up to a halt for me.
This book is only told through Saba’s POV only which was a surprise to me after Reborn and not necessarily a welcomed change. While I do enjoy single POV in books, I felt trapped with Saba in this one. Saba's character felt exhausting at times, especially in the beginning. He seemed to be trying too hard to fit the badass sassy archetype, which didn't quite align with the gravity of his situation—being questioned for a mass murder by his own brother and facing possible execution(!). This made it difficult for me to connect with him.
Also his “I was a good boy” and his inner monologue about being someone’s dog and calling himself a slut etc. just was really pulling me out of the book.
Examp. “Oh, I’ll be such a good boy for you, Sir Zek,” he spat. “And if not, you can put a leash on me. Walk me into Doskor like a dog—I’m sure the emperor would love to see a Ker on their knees.”
Examp. “And the only thing he could think was: You inconsistent little slut.”
Examp. Saba looked to Zek like a dog might its master, because apparently that’s what Saba was becoming.
Examp. Really? On your knees immediately? Don’t you dare look up, you slut. Nothing good can come from looking up at shirtless Zek from this angle—
The complicated relationship with his brother was also lacking. I was hoping for a heart wrenching story but what I thought to be an appetizer for what’s to come apparently was the whole menu? Maksid is literally turning into his enemy right in front of Saba’s eyes and later confessing [spoiler! his betrayal and involvement in the incident] and somehow it is less important than Saba being gifted fancy clothes by his love interest.
Later in the book we get a confrontation between Saba and Maksid, where the latter voices his frustration/anger about his brother’s transition and I felt like the conversation lacked a bit of nuance and was very one-sided and rushed. It could have been genuinely interesting since Maksid isn’t just a transphobe who is hating on his little brother but the first born of a royal family who grew up in a matriarchy where he wasn’t a viable heir due to his gender. And then his sister reveals he’s a boy too and still gets the throne… I don’t know, I guess it wasn’t the kind of story this book was trying to tell or even focusing on, but I would’ve found it an interesting topic to discuss.
The book ends with Saba being recognized as the prince/king of Kerinsk and while I was happy for Saba, I also felt… unsatisfied? Saba rarely talked about his royal status. Sure, we got that reveal about him being the “long lost princess” but that was more about his trans identity than about him wanting to rule anything. He was shown to be hot headed, undiplomatic, selfish, and rude. The only time we hear about his thoughts about ruling was when he was miserable about being called “princess” and being forced into a title that he didn’t want. Not really great qualities for a future ruler. All the better if we would’ve seen him grow into a great ruler.
To jump back to our protagonist; Saba's “woe is me” act was at times super exhausting. Sure, he was framed for something he didn’t do and has a lot of trauma but he really had to jump at everybody’s throat and CLAIM all the guilt of the world. We get it, somebody gives this boy a medal so we can move on.
Examp. “You relinquished your citizenship, but you claim our grief? You don’t get to do that.”
The scale of the massacre also didn’t seem as great as it should’ve been. We never learn anything about the victims. Saba’s guilt was a great starting point but shouldn’t have ended there. Who were these people? It all felt very removed and I wish we would’ve sat down and actually taken a page or two to really give us a moment to grief these lost lives.
Aside from Saba, I felt the other characters weren't as well fleshed out. I’m more of a characters-over-plot kind of reader so that annoyed me a lot. Moss -- Saba’s best friend -- is the typical innocent girl archetype. Her unwavering belief in Saba's innocence, despite the lack of evidence, felt unconvincing. We didn’t really get much bonding time between them and from the start it was made clear that Moss was “too sweet for her own good” and “too good” and “naive” etc.
Examp. “Mossinne, don’t be naïve,” the sentinel said, because he was an asshole. “He stands accused of a massacre.” But this didn’t sway Moss either.
The romance between Moss and the female paladin happened too quickly with absolutely no build-up. We met Moss, we met the female paladin, they glanced at each other thrice, they kissed. They didn’t really add anything to this story plot-wise or character-wise. I thought we’d be going somewhere when Moss mentioned that their romance was sort of “forbidden” but… we didn’t.
To stay with the romance aspect of the story, the romance between Saba and Zek didn’t pull me in, either. There were cute and tender moments, yes, but not enough to make me root for the couple or be truly invested. Despite the slowburn, the constant horniness of Saba was exhausting to read. He is standing in front of the Eye that literally killed his people and he’s like “Zek, tell them I’ve been a good boy” like ??? It’s just who Saba is and while I do love myself a good silly character moment but he *always* has something cheeky, flirty, or some innuendo to say when it’s REALLY not appropriate and I just want to shake him and scream “READ THE ROOM”.
That coupled with the fact that Zek remained pretty bleak to me for the most part. Sure, I did like the self-acceptance part of the book a lot and I enjoyed his calm nature but it always felt like there was a barrier we didn’t cross. A thin curtain keeping us from truly connecting with him (us being me).
And this book was obsessed with reminding us that Zek was -- in fact -- fat. Like, every other page when Zek moved the floor creaked, the chair groaned, the stairs collapsed, the world shook… WE GET IT. I’m super down for more body variety in books - this just felt so excessive and unnecessary.
That brings me to my next point: Meeting God. I’m a bit on the fence about this one. While I do enjoy the body positivity in this book and the serious talk about accepting who you are and appreciating your body etc. If I had the chance to literally wake up in the perfect body… I’m sorry if that makes me a bad person but I’d take it. Saba’s goal for the entire book was to create a device that would make it possible for him to morph himself into that perfect body. And then he has a talk with this God-like thing and suddenly he’s like “you know what? nevermind!” He built a device that literally killed people…
Examp. Saba laughed. It was the first time in his life he’d ever been grateful to be born the way he had. But he also laughed at the irony. If he hadn’t been dissatisfied with who he was, he wouldn’t have dreamed of entering the astral sea in the first place.
And maybe I’m just getting it wrong, butt he next part confused me. Saba asked “God” why it created him like this (in a female body) instead of just giving him his “real” body from the start. And the explanation was very… confusing? Basically, “God” said that if they had given Saba his “right” body he would’ve never been trans, never injected himself with testo (and some fancy abyss magic stuff) and never created the device to meet “God”. And while I understand that I don’t understand why he even had to do that. Like, it ended with him keeping his body and returning to the world and that’s it… I guess there was some finding out about where the gjfdjf first landed or something but… idk it felt very pointless.
To wrap this up: I really enjoyed a lot of different aspects of this book (e.g. the writing, the worldbuilding, the sad parts, etc.) though not enough to outweigh the things that bugged me.
I recommend this book to everyone who wants a book with a beautiful worldbuilding, with a morally grey main character, and a slowburn romance.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 28, 2025
Lovely! Just a bit too much exposition for me which dragged the story to a grinding halt several times. Also, I don’t care for instalove. But I love a good Trans protagonist! 🏳️⚧️
August 8, 2024
Copy for review from BookSirens
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I loved loved loved this book. First of all, the tension between Saba and Zek is amazing. And the whole exploration of Saba's acceptance of his body and his transness and his heritage.
They both take it slow and help each other in their own journey.
The best moment was when Zek let Saba know he thought him pretty and Saba just couldn't accept it, but when Zek said it later on in the book he accepted it more and more.
It's a beautiful love story within a political world with a lot of mystery, searching for answers and celebrating being trans and celebrating gay love.
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I loved loved loved this book. First of all, the tension between Saba and Zek is amazing. And the whole exploration of Saba's acceptance of his body and his transness and his heritage.
They both take it slow and help each other in their own journey.
The best moment was when Zek let Saba know he thought him pretty and Saba just couldn't accept it, but when Zek said it later on in the book he accepted it more and more.
It's a beautiful love story within a political world with a lot of mystery, searching for answers and celebrating being trans and celebrating gay love.
October 6, 2024
Thank you to BookSirens for the ARC.
I was excited for this book and cautiously optimistic, seeing as it has a trans main character and the summary of the plot caught my interest. Murder? False accusations? A mystery to solve and a queer love story. Sounds amazing. What could go wrong?
Sadly, a lot. Now, I want to start this review by pointing out the things that I did love and/or appreciate. I'll get into my issues and, admittedly, nitpicks a few paragraphs down the line.
First and foremost, the best thing I have to say about this book is the relationship between the two main characters.
Saba and Zek both struggle with body image issues in the book, and although the root cause differs for both, they find some sort of kinship and connection due to it. It was written in a sweet way, which made me crave more scenes like that. There is an understanding and tenderness between them that did manage touch my rather cold heart. Their personalities also balance each other out quite well, with Saba being the more rash and snappy type, while Zek is more mellow and thoughtful. His calmness and understanding of Saba is what ties the relationship together for me.
Another positive aspect I want to mention is that the book managed to make me tear up on a few occasions. Those moments were related to Saba's body issues, and as someone who struggles with gender and how I want to be perceived myself, it hit really close to home. Those sentences were beautifully written, and I loved the visceral emotion it evoked from me.
Unfortunately, this is where my positives end already. I thought about this book a lot after I finished reading it and revised this review a few times. I can't, for the life of me, find anything else that made this book enjoyable or worthwhile, which in hindsight is depressing. Everything else from here on out are my problems with the book and the nitpicks I had. I try to keep it short and to the point.
Saba - Who let the dogs out
The lovely protagonist of the book, simply put, not very likable. And I'm aware protagonists don't need to be. However, I got the feeling that the author wanted to convey Saba as someone messy and feral, but still loveable. It completely fell flat for me. Saba, as a character, has a deep amount of self hatred, which stems from not feeling like he is in the body he belongs to, the body that he deserves to have. So far, so good. I'm down with that. Very relatable. His goal of entering the astral sea and getting the body he craves was a great plot point and I would have been invested, if it weren't for the teensy-tiny fact that the moment I started this book, it was clear how everything would play out. Of course, he would not go through with it because of self-love and acceptance. Duh. While it's of course a great message to send and an entirely unoffensive portrayal of transness, looking back at how Saba was portrayed as a "feral dog" who would do anything to reach his goal during the book, I was hoping for some kind of selfish act. But no. Like any good and neat trans rep book, he accepts his body in the end and comes to terms with it. I'm aware this is a very personal gripe, but damn, I really wish queer characters were allowed to be selfish and make awful choices. I know I would. But I guess this is the wrong book for that. Anyway, moving on.
I already mentioned it, but it needs its own point. Saba is a dog. Yep. Not literally, but he is described as that often enough, so it might as well be true. Nearly every chapter, him being like a dog has to be mentioned. He even barks one time, which made my toenails curl because Saba felt like he ate with that. He didn't. If he's not exactly a dog, he is a good boy. This is mentioned on five different occasions in the book. We get it. Saba is a feral, needy dog who needs to be tamed by big Alpha daddy Zek and be called a good boy. Bleh. It would have been fine if it hadn't been used so excessively. At some point, I had to put the book down because of it, stare at a wall, and question my life choices. Beating your readers over the head with this over and over again is draining and frankly annoying.
While Saba is busy thirsting after Zek at every given moment (yes, even when Zek is in pain when he is struggling to walk up the stairs) he constantly is slut shaming himself in his own thoughts. I thought this made kind of sense at first because Saba believes no one would ever want or desire him, and so he shames himself out of his own wants because in his mind, he is undesirable. Buuut....it's simply not true. Later on in the book it is mentioned, that Saba did fuck around a lot. He apparently had no problem finding people who wanted him, and who were even nice, liked him, and didn't mind that he was trans. And Saba had zero issues with getting naked and down and dirty with others. I'm beyond confused at this point. Like many other things in this book, I just accepted it with sigh and moved on.
We get to the epliogue which contains the good, old devils tango between Saba and Zek, kind of like a reward for making it through this book. And at this point I'm just completely done. The sex scene is exactly what I had expected, but somehow also worse. The epilogue is a timeskip (I think a few months ahead, but I can't find the exact time frame). Saba is starting to feel at ease with his own body and you know what that means. Sex. Which is nice. Saba was of course bottoming, because trans men somehow always bottom in books (nitpick). And oh boy was it a slap in the face when the words cl*t and c*nt were thrown into the mix. So in that short time, Saba was not only learning to like his body but now suddenly is completely okay with having his genitals described that way? I was getting dysphoria from reading this and I'm not even sure where I fall on the gender spectrum yet. It was messy.
Speaking of messy, or more like unsanitary: Did Zek really take his dirty cane, which he was walking around the whole book with through all kinds of terrain, and rub the tip of it across Saba's cl*t?? Yes. Yes, he did. That's a real sentence in the book and it made me gag. I'm glad it was the epilogue because I would not have been able to take any more of this.
Thank you, next.
Zek - Big man with a big heart
He is the love interest and a big man. A big, burly man. A big, burly, manly man with thick forearms and thick fingers, who does everything with a lot of noise. Zek is always grunting and the floor or chair is always creaking when he moves. I was tired of having him described that way after a while.
As a character, Zek is....well, he is there. He has positive attributes like being patient and calm and understanding. What made him fall flat for me, was his lack of faults. The only flaw he is allowed, is that he served in the war where he injured his leg and he is still feeling guilty. Wow, groundbreaking.
I don't have a lot else to say about Zek because he is just a bit too bland of a love interest. Fine, but nothing to write home about.
Maksid - Oh brother, my brother
Oh boy, Maksid, I wished you were the character I imagined you to be. But alas, the world is cruel. He is Saba's brother and is only there because of the following points.
1. Being transphobic (in the old habits die hard kind of way)
2. Being a plot device, just there to be pushed around the board to drive the thin plot forward
3. Telling Saba in the epilogue how much he deserves someone like Zek, before going off and doing whatever it is he does.
I was disappointed, to say the least. I have a weakness for family dynamics and the potential this book had to dig into the meat of it was thrown out of the window entirely. Their country functioned under a matrimony and Saba was supposed to be queen but threw all that away? Maksid who could never rule, even if he wanted to? The resentment, the angst. We could have had it all. What could have been a deep and complicated family bond between Saba and the Maksid, sadly turned out to be a whole nothingburger. As a fan of complicated sibling relationships, I was not being served. I suppose Saba is only allowed to have one emotional bond in this book. I get it, it's a romance but why must a book like this be devoid of other bonds which aren't romantic in nature?
Another point that stood out to me and made me scratch my head in hindsight, were two particular moments in the book. At the start, Saba has some rather petty thoughts about his brother's looks:
"Saba had at least won out with his face. Their late mother had a fine bone structure, with prominent cheekbones and a relatively wide jaw. Those same bones sat well in Saba’s face, but they poked severely through Maksid’s with an angry bite, as if the skin had been pulled too taut. Which was perhaps the reason his brother had been so desperate to earn that sentinel mask."
Later on, in the astral sea, Saba's inner thoughts are as follows:
"This version was born from all of Saba’s insecurities. He had thought: I have a weak jaw, and so had envisioned a stronger one. He had thought: My cheeks are round and ill-defined, and so he had given himself prominent cheekbones. The result was a lengthened face, one that was slightly unapproachable; sharp features made him thorny, his expression pinched in a natural look of superiority."
I was so sure this was meant to be a parallel to Maksid, that Saba wished wished he looked more like his brother and was jealous of his looks. Only....it's never mentioned again and he and Maksid never have a conversation relating to this subject in the slightest. What could have brought more depth two the relationship between the two brothers, was simply discarded without aby kind of satisfying resolution. And now I'm sitting here, doubting if this parallel was even intended or if it was by accident.
Maksid may not have had a main role or a deeper character in this book but I still hold him dear to my heart, because he is one of the few characters that didn't actively grind my gears. I'll pour one out for him.
Last, but not least:
Moss and Whatshername. I mean, Moss and Silvana. - The token Sapphics
I mention them as an item, because this is sadly all they are. Two cardboard cutouts, with zero depth and tacked on personalities, who are just the token background sapphics.
Moss is tiny and sweet, while Silvana is tall and stoic. They get introduced, fuck off to do their own thing, get caught kissing, help Saba and Zek (offscreen, which is laufhable in itself), fuck off again, are present for the final climax to fight the big bad and get a cameo in the epilogue. And...that's it. To be honest, I don't understand the point of these characters. You could have cut them out of the narrative and it wouldn't have made a difference. Moss and Saba are supposed to be somewhat friends, but I never got the feeling they were. Moss got one moment where she defended Saba when people were badmouthing him (it was cringe) but that was about it. Another missed opportunity at fleshing out characters. Anyway, the book does clearly not care for them, so why should I?
That's a big chunk of my complaints out of the way.
The worst offense of this book at the end of the day however, is that it is simply boring. I can deal with bad books, as long as they fun to read. But a boring book? It's hard work. I was struggling through some of the chapters. I know the author has this whole world, the politics and everything thought out. It's impressive and I 100% respect the craft. However, for my taste it's simply not conveyed in an engaging or interesting way. There are exposition dumps, lengthy descriptions of places that don't matter overall, even lengthier descriptions of what a character is wearing at any given time down to a T, and bits and pieces or lore that are presented in the blandest way possible. None of it grabbed or could hold my attention. It was a problem I was already struggling with in previous book as well.
Furthermore, the plot was less than I thought it would be, which was disappointing. I was under the impression that beside the obvious romance, the book would have a little mystery to solve on the side. Who was responsible for the explosion of the machine Saba built? What could have been an intriguing mystery was anything but that. Immediately, it's clear who the culprit must be, simply by excluding all the good guys. Surprise. It's the obvious evil guy. The one guy I forgot the name of. After that "reveal" my eyes glazed over as I kept reading the rest of the book. Even the climax didn't manage to save this.
The book is exactly what it tells you it is, which isn't inherently a bad thing. As long as one doesn't hold any expectation, it might even be enjoyable for some.
While it sadly was a miss for me, I'm sure others can find something worthwhile in it. I want to end this review on a more positive note, despite the many criticism.
This book is for everyone who wants to read about the journey of a trans man finding and accepting himself for who he is, who falls in love with a caring man that cherishes all of him. It's for people who like to read romantasy where the strong point is the romance rather than the plot and for people who like their happy end to have a little spicy epilogue.
I was excited for this book and cautiously optimistic, seeing as it has a trans main character and the summary of the plot caught my interest. Murder? False accusations? A mystery to solve and a queer love story. Sounds amazing. What could go wrong?
Sadly, a lot. Now, I want to start this review by pointing out the things that I did love and/or appreciate. I'll get into my issues and, admittedly, nitpicks a few paragraphs down the line.
First and foremost, the best thing I have to say about this book is the relationship between the two main characters.
Saba and Zek both struggle with body image issues in the book, and although the root cause differs for both, they find some sort of kinship and connection due to it. It was written in a sweet way, which made me crave more scenes like that. There is an understanding and tenderness between them that did manage touch my rather cold heart. Their personalities also balance each other out quite well, with Saba being the more rash and snappy type, while Zek is more mellow and thoughtful. His calmness and understanding of Saba is what ties the relationship together for me.
Another positive aspect I want to mention is that the book managed to make me tear up on a few occasions. Those moments were related to Saba's body issues, and as someone who struggles with gender and how I want to be perceived myself, it hit really close to home. Those sentences were beautifully written, and I loved the visceral emotion it evoked from me.
Unfortunately, this is where my positives end already. I thought about this book a lot after I finished reading it and revised this review a few times. I can't, for the life of me, find anything else that made this book enjoyable or worthwhile, which in hindsight is depressing. Everything else from here on out are my problems with the book and the nitpicks I had. I try to keep it short and to the point.
Saba - Who let the dogs out
The lovely protagonist of the book, simply put, not very likable. And I'm aware protagonists don't need to be. However, I got the feeling that the author wanted to convey Saba as someone messy and feral, but still loveable. It completely fell flat for me. Saba, as a character, has a deep amount of self hatred, which stems from not feeling like he is in the body he belongs to, the body that he deserves to have. So far, so good. I'm down with that. Very relatable. His goal of entering the astral sea and getting the body he craves was a great plot point and I would have been invested, if it weren't for the teensy-tiny fact that the moment I started this book, it was clear how everything would play out. Of course, he would not go through with it because of self-love and acceptance. Duh. While it's of course a great message to send and an entirely unoffensive portrayal of transness, looking back at how Saba was portrayed as a "feral dog" who would do anything to reach his goal during the book, I was hoping for some kind of selfish act. But no. Like any good and neat trans rep book, he accepts his body in the end and comes to terms with it. I'm aware this is a very personal gripe, but damn, I really wish queer characters were allowed to be selfish and make awful choices. I know I would. But I guess this is the wrong book for that. Anyway, moving on.
I already mentioned it, but it needs its own point. Saba is a dog. Yep. Not literally, but he is described as that often enough, so it might as well be true. Nearly every chapter, him being like a dog has to be mentioned. He even barks one time, which made my toenails curl because Saba felt like he ate with that. He didn't. If he's not exactly a dog, he is a good boy. This is mentioned on five different occasions in the book. We get it. Saba is a feral, needy dog who needs to be tamed by big Alpha daddy Zek and be called a good boy. Bleh. It would have been fine if it hadn't been used so excessively. At some point, I had to put the book down because of it, stare at a wall, and question my life choices. Beating your readers over the head with this over and over again is draining and frankly annoying.
While Saba is busy thirsting after Zek at every given moment (yes, even when Zek is in pain when he is struggling to walk up the stairs) he constantly is slut shaming himself in his own thoughts. I thought this made kind of sense at first because Saba believes no one would ever want or desire him, and so he shames himself out of his own wants because in his mind, he is undesirable. Buuut....it's simply not true. Later on in the book it is mentioned, that Saba did fuck around a lot. He apparently had no problem finding people who wanted him, and who were even nice, liked him, and didn't mind that he was trans. And Saba had zero issues with getting naked and down and dirty with others. I'm beyond confused at this point. Like many other things in this book, I just accepted it with sigh and moved on.
We get to the epliogue which contains the good, old devils tango between Saba and Zek, kind of like a reward for making it through this book. And at this point I'm just completely done. The sex scene is exactly what I had expected, but somehow also worse. The epilogue is a timeskip (I think a few months ahead, but I can't find the exact time frame). Saba is starting to feel at ease with his own body and you know what that means. Sex. Which is nice. Saba was of course bottoming, because trans men somehow always bottom in books (nitpick). And oh boy was it a slap in the face when the words cl*t and c*nt were thrown into the mix. So in that short time, Saba was not only learning to like his body but now suddenly is completely okay with having his genitals described that way? I was getting dysphoria from reading this and I'm not even sure where I fall on the gender spectrum yet. It was messy.
Speaking of messy, or more like unsanitary: Did Zek really take his dirty cane, which he was walking around the whole book with through all kinds of terrain, and rub the tip of it across Saba's cl*t?? Yes. Yes, he did. That's a real sentence in the book and it made me gag. I'm glad it was the epilogue because I would not have been able to take any more of this.
Thank you, next.
Zek - Big man with a big heart
He is the love interest and a big man. A big, burly man. A big, burly, manly man with thick forearms and thick fingers, who does everything with a lot of noise. Zek is always grunting and the floor or chair is always creaking when he moves. I was tired of having him described that way after a while.
As a character, Zek is....well, he is there. He has positive attributes like being patient and calm and understanding. What made him fall flat for me, was his lack of faults. The only flaw he is allowed, is that he served in the war where he injured his leg and he is still feeling guilty. Wow, groundbreaking.
I don't have a lot else to say about Zek because he is just a bit too bland of a love interest. Fine, but nothing to write home about.
Maksid - Oh brother, my brother
Oh boy, Maksid, I wished you were the character I imagined you to be. But alas, the world is cruel. He is Saba's brother and is only there because of the following points.
1. Being transphobic (in the old habits die hard kind of way)
2. Being a plot device, just there to be pushed around the board to drive the thin plot forward
3. Telling Saba in the epilogue how much he deserves someone like Zek, before going off and doing whatever it is he does.
I was disappointed, to say the least. I have a weakness for family dynamics and the potential this book had to dig into the meat of it was thrown out of the window entirely. Their country functioned under a matrimony and Saba was supposed to be queen but threw all that away? Maksid who could never rule, even if he wanted to? The resentment, the angst. We could have had it all. What could have been a deep and complicated family bond between Saba and the Maksid, sadly turned out to be a whole nothingburger. As a fan of complicated sibling relationships, I was not being served. I suppose Saba is only allowed to have one emotional bond in this book. I get it, it's a romance but why must a book like this be devoid of other bonds which aren't romantic in nature?
Another point that stood out to me and made me scratch my head in hindsight, were two particular moments in the book. At the start, Saba has some rather petty thoughts about his brother's looks:
"Saba had at least won out with his face. Their late mother had a fine bone structure, with prominent cheekbones and a relatively wide jaw. Those same bones sat well in Saba’s face, but they poked severely through Maksid’s with an angry bite, as if the skin had been pulled too taut. Which was perhaps the reason his brother had been so desperate to earn that sentinel mask."
Later on, in the astral sea, Saba's inner thoughts are as follows:
"This version was born from all of Saba’s insecurities. He had thought: I have a weak jaw, and so had envisioned a stronger one. He had thought: My cheeks are round and ill-defined, and so he had given himself prominent cheekbones. The result was a lengthened face, one that was slightly unapproachable; sharp features made him thorny, his expression pinched in a natural look of superiority."
I was so sure this was meant to be a parallel to Maksid, that Saba wished wished he looked more like his brother and was jealous of his looks. Only....it's never mentioned again and he and Maksid never have a conversation relating to this subject in the slightest. What could have brought more depth two the relationship between the two brothers, was simply discarded without aby kind of satisfying resolution. And now I'm sitting here, doubting if this parallel was even intended or if it was by accident.
Maksid may not have had a main role or a deeper character in this book but I still hold him dear to my heart, because he is one of the few characters that didn't actively grind my gears. I'll pour one out for him.
Last, but not least:
Moss and Whatshername. I mean, Moss and Silvana. - The token Sapphics
I mention them as an item, because this is sadly all they are. Two cardboard cutouts, with zero depth and tacked on personalities, who are just the token background sapphics.
Moss is tiny and sweet, while Silvana is tall and stoic. They get introduced, fuck off to do their own thing, get caught kissing, help Saba and Zek (offscreen, which is laufhable in itself), fuck off again, are present for the final climax to fight the big bad and get a cameo in the epilogue. And...that's it. To be honest, I don't understand the point of these characters. You could have cut them out of the narrative and it wouldn't have made a difference. Moss and Saba are supposed to be somewhat friends, but I never got the feeling they were. Moss got one moment where she defended Saba when people were badmouthing him (it was cringe) but that was about it. Another missed opportunity at fleshing out characters. Anyway, the book does clearly not care for them, so why should I?
That's a big chunk of my complaints out of the way.
The worst offense of this book at the end of the day however, is that it is simply boring. I can deal with bad books, as long as they fun to read. But a boring book? It's hard work. I was struggling through some of the chapters. I know the author has this whole world, the politics and everything thought out. It's impressive and I 100% respect the craft. However, for my taste it's simply not conveyed in an engaging or interesting way. There are exposition dumps, lengthy descriptions of places that don't matter overall, even lengthier descriptions of what a character is wearing at any given time down to a T, and bits and pieces or lore that are presented in the blandest way possible. None of it grabbed or could hold my attention. It was a problem I was already struggling with in previous book as well.
Furthermore, the plot was less than I thought it would be, which was disappointing. I was under the impression that beside the obvious romance, the book would have a little mystery to solve on the side. Who was responsible for the explosion of the machine Saba built? What could have been an intriguing mystery was anything but that. Immediately, it's clear who the culprit must be, simply by excluding all the good guys. Surprise. It's the obvious evil guy. The one guy I forgot the name of. After that "reveal" my eyes glazed over as I kept reading the rest of the book. Even the climax didn't manage to save this.
The book is exactly what it tells you it is, which isn't inherently a bad thing. As long as one doesn't hold any expectation, it might even be enjoyable for some.
While it sadly was a miss for me, I'm sure others can find something worthwhile in it. I want to end this review on a more positive note, despite the many criticism.
This book is for everyone who wants to read about the journey of a trans man finding and accepting himself for who he is, who falls in love with a caring man that cherishes all of him. It's for people who like to read romantasy where the strong point is the romance rather than the plot and for people who like their happy end to have a little spicy epilogue.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
October 8, 2024
4.5/5 stars
Reclaimed is the third standalone book in Seth Haddon’s The World of Reforged queer high fantasy series. After Saba’s arcane invention to peek into the astral sea malfunctions and destroys an entire city district along with its refugee inhabitants, city leaders, and a foreign dignitary, he is accused of masterminding the whole plot. He is then handed over to Zek, the ambassador from the Rezwyn Empire to stand trial for his countryman’s murder. But Zek isn’t so sure of Rue’s guilt and they work together to discover what really happened.
I thought this was Seth Haddon’s best book yet. While the first two books were court fantasies (with strong romance components), this was a personal and intimate fantasy (with a romance subplot). I was captivated. So despite it returning to a single POV (instead of the dual POV the previous book had), it worked really well for the story it was telling. Saba struggles with his place as a refugee who was forced to hide his own status just to be accepted into society as well as his own gender identity as a trans man who still isn’t comfortable in his own body. I appreciated how deeply tied in his own gender dysphoria was to the main plot of the deadly arcane device. There isn’t one without the other, and this just really made the book feel so much more insular with deeply personal stakes that just became world-threatening.
I liked the mystery, the investigation, and the final confrontation. I loved the slowburn romance between Saba and Zek which slowly intensified throughout, but only ultimately consummated in the very last chapter. I liked how their body issues were paralleled with Zek’s struggles with his disability and chronic pain contrasting with Saba’s own gender dysphoria. Then there’s the subjugator-subjugated component where the very empire Zek represents is the reason Saba is a refugee in a foreign nation as well as the questioning of Zek’s complicity as a young soldier in the war. The book has a very nuanced take on these issues that is explored well if a bit conveniently concluded.
Reclaimed is an intimate fantasy story of self-acceptance that has a lot to say about gender and identity.
*Thank you to BookSirens for the eARC.
Reclaimed is the third standalone book in Seth Haddon’s The World of Reforged queer high fantasy series. After Saba’s arcane invention to peek into the astral sea malfunctions and destroys an entire city district along with its refugee inhabitants, city leaders, and a foreign dignitary, he is accused of masterminding the whole plot. He is then handed over to Zek, the ambassador from the Rezwyn Empire to stand trial for his countryman’s murder. But Zek isn’t so sure of Rue’s guilt and they work together to discover what really happened.
I thought this was Seth Haddon’s best book yet. While the first two books were court fantasies (with strong romance components), this was a personal and intimate fantasy (with a romance subplot). I was captivated. So despite it returning to a single POV (instead of the dual POV the previous book had), it worked really well for the story it was telling. Saba struggles with his place as a refugee who was forced to hide his own status just to be accepted into society as well as his own gender identity as a trans man who still isn’t comfortable in his own body. I appreciated how deeply tied in his own gender dysphoria was to the main plot of the deadly arcane device. There isn’t one without the other, and this just really made the book feel so much more insular with deeply personal stakes that just became world-threatening.
I liked the mystery, the investigation, and the final confrontation. I loved the slowburn romance between Saba and Zek which slowly intensified throughout, but only ultimately consummated in the very last chapter. I liked how their body issues were paralleled with Zek’s struggles with his disability and chronic pain contrasting with Saba’s own gender dysphoria. Then there’s the subjugator-subjugated component where the very empire Zek represents is the reason Saba is a refugee in a foreign nation as well as the questioning of Zek’s complicity as a young soldier in the war. The book has a very nuanced take on these issues that is explored well if a bit conveniently concluded.
Reclaimed is an intimate fantasy story of self-acceptance that has a lot to say about gender and identity.
*Thank you to BookSirens for the eARC.
June 8, 2024
I received an ARC in exchange of an honest review and folks, Seth Haddon strikes again. This might my favourite work of his yet. As a trans man with a love of fantasy world building, flawed characters, and tension-filled romance, Reclaimed has hit all the sweet spots.
The setting and world building feel deep and complex, with a real lived-in vibe. You can tell there is a lot of history in the land right from the get-go, and the way this shapes the world around our protagonist is compelling. Haddon has clearly put a lot of thought into how his setting shapes the themes of the story, with colonialism and class conflict being discussed through Saba’s experiences as a Kerinskian refugee.
Speaking of Saba, he definitely is one of my favourite transgender protagonists to date (up there with Silas from The Spirit Bares Its Teeth). There’s something so satisfying about seeing queer characters allowed to be messy. Most fiction I find with transgender protagonists is aimed at teens (which is great, young trans people should have stories that they can relate to and use as escapism!), though this often runs into the problem of “good” representation - we can’t let that character be a bad person or make bad choices or have crippling self hatred or dysphoria because we want young queer people to have positive depictions of queerness to look up to. Again, great in theory, but sometimes I WANT characters to be a little fucked up. I like morally grey characters and I like bitchy characters and I like when good people do bad things because it makes for a good story. Saba is such a fun character for me to read because he is FLAWED. He has some serious internalised issues with his body, which is so refreshingly realistic to see depicted, even if it might not be comfortable all the time, and he has terrible coping mechanisms (me too buddy). He is bitchy and snarky and the first thing he does in the story is get punched in the face so of course I instantly fell in love with him. He’s smart and very very angry (both at the world and himself), so he made for a very fun (if a little frustrating) main character.
Of course I can’t talk about Saba without talking about Luan Zek (and I am always happy to talk about Luan Zek). From what little we saw of him in Reborn I was so excited to have him back in the spotlight this time, and boy oh boy he did not disappoint. He is a perfect balance to Saba’s natural snark; patient and level headed but more than capable of quipping right back. His ability to put Saba in his place while still showing him more respect and trust than anyone else in that whole city was far too attractive and I was practically drooling anytime he pulled the authority card. As I am not disabled and don’t use mobility aids myself I can’t exactly speak on how accurate his depiction of using a cane was, however it certainly felt as though it was treated with a lot of respect and care.
As for the actual plot, I’ll avoid spoiling anything, but the classic who-done-it mystery takes on some pretty big stakes as our dear Saba is supposedly guilty of decimating a whole district… or is he? I personally found the inner workings of Saba’s mind and his second guessing of just how much of any of this could be his fault to be fascinating.
Reclaimed is an amazing book, but it’s also a love letter to anyone who has thought themselves unlovable. It is a story of finding self acceptance and learning to love yourself, written by an author who understands and writes these experiences with so much care and love.
The setting and world building feel deep and complex, with a real lived-in vibe. You can tell there is a lot of history in the land right from the get-go, and the way this shapes the world around our protagonist is compelling. Haddon has clearly put a lot of thought into how his setting shapes the themes of the story, with colonialism and class conflict being discussed through Saba’s experiences as a Kerinskian refugee.
Speaking of Saba, he definitely is one of my favourite transgender protagonists to date (up there with Silas from The Spirit Bares Its Teeth). There’s something so satisfying about seeing queer characters allowed to be messy. Most fiction I find with transgender protagonists is aimed at teens (which is great, young trans people should have stories that they can relate to and use as escapism!), though this often runs into the problem of “good” representation - we can’t let that character be a bad person or make bad choices or have crippling self hatred or dysphoria because we want young queer people to have positive depictions of queerness to look up to. Again, great in theory, but sometimes I WANT characters to be a little fucked up. I like morally grey characters and I like bitchy characters and I like when good people do bad things because it makes for a good story. Saba is such a fun character for me to read because he is FLAWED. He has some serious internalised issues with his body, which is so refreshingly realistic to see depicted, even if it might not be comfortable all the time, and he has terrible coping mechanisms (me too buddy). He is bitchy and snarky and the first thing he does in the story is get punched in the face so of course I instantly fell in love with him. He’s smart and very very angry (both at the world and himself), so he made for a very fun (if a little frustrating) main character.
Of course I can’t talk about Saba without talking about Luan Zek (and I am always happy to talk about Luan Zek). From what little we saw of him in Reborn I was so excited to have him back in the spotlight this time, and boy oh boy he did not disappoint. He is a perfect balance to Saba’s natural snark; patient and level headed but more than capable of quipping right back. His ability to put Saba in his place while still showing him more respect and trust than anyone else in that whole city was far too attractive and I was practically drooling anytime he pulled the authority card. As I am not disabled and don’t use mobility aids myself I can’t exactly speak on how accurate his depiction of using a cane was, however it certainly felt as though it was treated with a lot of respect and care.
As for the actual plot, I’ll avoid spoiling anything, but the classic who-done-it mystery takes on some pretty big stakes as our dear Saba is supposedly guilty of decimating a whole district… or is he? I personally found the inner workings of Saba’s mind and his second guessing of just how much of any of this could be his fault to be fascinating.
Reclaimed is an amazing book, but it’s also a love letter to anyone who has thought themselves unlovable. It is a story of finding self acceptance and learning to love yourself, written by an author who understands and writes these experiences with so much care and love.
August 6, 2024
Absolutely loved this book and well-deserved five stars!
I got this book as an ARC from the author, but my opinions remain my own.
I really enjoyed this fantasy novel where a hole is ripped in the world that killed people in the explosion. The main character is the one accused of causing this rip and that's where we start the book - with Saba being held in a prison and being questioned about his role in it.
I really enjoyed Saba as a character. He could be selfish and frustrating, but that's what made him far more real. He was inquisitive and an inventor which I thought was an interesting start to his character, and I liked how it was linked to his transition. I found that at times he would make most conversations about himself and his transition which had me thumping my head, BUT it was in character. There are times when an author is just jamming in conversation in order to make a point or prove something, but Saba was sometimes self-centred and it really worked for the story. And I understood completely why he was a little defensive and on edge no matter the conversation.
Zek was amazing. I liked that he had a disability and didn't try to hide it. Of course, it's not easy to hide that you need a cane, but he wasn't trying to hide when he was struggling or in pain. I also liked that he was a larger man and not some muscular pin up boy.
The tension between these characters was perfectly done. It was a great build up and I loved how the romance came to be. I wished we had a few more romantic interactions between them, but that's only because I was gnawing at the bars to my cage.
My only life issue, and it wasn't deep enough to warrant taking a star off, was towards the end.
Overall, I loved this book and I think now, more than ever, do we need to see positive trans characters in books. The world is spinning into crazy-ville, so the more we can do to support work like this and our friends, the better we'll be for it.
I got this book as an ARC from the author, but my opinions remain my own.
I really enjoyed this fantasy novel where a hole is ripped in the world that killed people in the explosion. The main character is the one accused of causing this rip and that's where we start the book - with Saba being held in a prison and being questioned about his role in it.
I really enjoyed Saba as a character. He could be selfish and frustrating, but that's what made him far more real. He was inquisitive and an inventor which I thought was an interesting start to his character, and I liked how it was linked to his transition. I found that at times he would make most conversations about himself and his transition which had me thumping my head, BUT it was in character. There are times when an author is just jamming in conversation in order to make a point or prove something, but Saba was sometimes self-centred and it really worked for the story. And I understood completely why he was a little defensive and on edge no matter the conversation.
Zek was amazing. I liked that he had a disability and didn't try to hide it. Of course, it's not easy to hide that you need a cane, but he wasn't trying to hide when he was struggling or in pain. I also liked that he was a larger man and not some muscular pin up boy.
The tension between these characters was perfectly done. It was a great build up and I loved how the romance came to be. I wished we had a few more romantic interactions between them, but that's only because I was gnawing at the bars to my cage.
My only life issue, and it wasn't deep enough to warrant taking a star off, was towards the end.
Overall, I loved this book and I think now, more than ever, do we need to see positive trans characters in books. The world is spinning into crazy-ville, so the more we can do to support work like this and our friends, the better we'll be for it.
May 28, 2024
I somehow secured an eARC (many thanks to the author!) and couldn’t put it down!
Reclaimed is about a disgraced academic and an ambassador who join forces to determine how the academic’s invention destroyed a city district.
First off, I loved how the mystery unraveled! I kept flipping pages because I had to know what exactly caused the device’s malfunction.
Saba is a very compelling lead. He has a complicated relationship with the past (which includes his brother) and carries a lot of guilt regarding his research and the event.
Also, I’m just a big fan of engineering adjacent things in fantasy settings - and Saba’s research and invention definitely are.
Zek is a bit of an enigma, at times. He’s a former soldier turned ambassador of a country that forced Saba to be a refugee. (You may recognize the Rezwyn Empire & its Emperor from Reborn). I did love Zek’s casual acts of kindness throughout the novel, too!
All in all, I really enjoyed this novel! (Also shout out to the super cute sapphic side couple - I love them so much!)
Reclaimed is about a disgraced academic and an ambassador who join forces to determine how the academic’s invention destroyed a city district.
First off, I loved how the mystery unraveled! I kept flipping pages because I had to know what exactly caused the device’s malfunction.
Saba is a very compelling lead. He has a complicated relationship with the past (which includes his brother) and carries a lot of guilt regarding his research and the event.
Also, I’m just a big fan of engineering adjacent things in fantasy settings - and Saba’s research and invention definitely are.
Zek is a bit of an enigma, at times. He’s a former soldier turned ambassador of a country that forced Saba to be a refugee. (You may recognize the Rezwyn Empire & its Emperor from Reborn). I did love Zek’s casual acts of kindness throughout the novel, too!
All in all, I really enjoyed this novel! (Also shout out to the super cute sapphic side couple - I love them so much!)
November 24, 2025
4.5 stars
I did not have the best time with Reforged, which I mainly read because I wanted to read Reclaimed, but I'm super happy to say that I thoroughly enjoyed this!
I'm always on the lookout for more trans romantasy, and while I am not entirely sure if this technically counts as romantasy (I never really understood the exact definition of the subgenre or where the line is between it, romantic fantasy, or fantasy with a romance subplot), this has been on my radar for a while.
In Reforged I struggled with emotional investment in the characters as a whole and the romance in particular, including the lack of chemistry between the main couple, and the political intrigue plot was just fine. In Reclaimed, I had none of those issues.
I really enjoyed Saba as a main character. The plot throws you right into him being interrogated as the main suspect for a terrorism attack focussed on the refugee population within the city. We also learn about Saba being a refugee himself and being demoted for it, as well as that he feels responsible and is struggling with guilt and grief, despite being very clearly innocent. Enter Luan Zek, an ambassador sent to investigate the death of one of his countrymen, who may or may not have died in the terrorism attack.
Zek and Saba have tangible chemistry from the very start that quickly goes beyond physical attraction. That physical attraction is sometimes at odds with the gravity of the plot, but even that dissonance is very well integrated into the plot and actively acknowledged by the narrative.
It also plays a role in Saba's self perception, as his internal struggle with his own identity as a trans man and dysphoria in particular is a big theme in the book. The way his feelings about being trans was integrated into the narrative and plot was very well done - it's not a book about being trans, but him being trans have direct impacts on the events of the book and are a huge motivating factor, which I thought was very cleverly done. I also appreciated the nuanced conversations about the complicated feelings Saba has towards his body and sex due to his identity and dysphoria. The book and setting is largely accepting of his identity, though there are a few instances of misgendering and deadnaming, as Saba's past is a whole other plot point (that has a positive ending!)
Saba's past is probably the narratively weakest part of the book. It's not really a spoiler as I personally found it very clear what was going on very early in the book, but it's not technically revealed directly on-page until later. Either way, for me there were a lot of unanswered questions how he ended up in his position at the time of start of the book, and his childhood, especially in combination with his brother. That relationship was probably also the one I was the most disatisfied with while reading. I would have loved with the sibling dynamic to be more explore, or more clearly be labelled as estranged (?) on-page.
The combination of worldbuilding, intrigue, mystery and romance was super well done here. Reclaimed plays in a completely different country from Reforged, with a very different culture. The worldbuilding is very detailed and quite complex, at times maybe a bit too much so, but I enjoyed the nuance and consistency here, as well as how the main culture contrasts with that of characters who come from other countries.
Another thing I enjoyed was how Zek as a love interest, while strong, is also fat and described as such on page. He is also disabled due to a war injury. The casual integration of both his size and his disability was handled very well in my (admittedly limited) understanding.
Given both Saba and Zek's background, the romance as such was very much not gentle. But that grit and bite was exactly what made it so wonderful. It was a lot about respect and understanding, even as they challenge and push each other.
Overall this was a wonderful tense fantasy mystery with a great trans protagonist and nuanced romance.
I did not have the best time with Reforged, which I mainly read because I wanted to read Reclaimed, but I'm super happy to say that I thoroughly enjoyed this!
I'm always on the lookout for more trans romantasy, and while I am not entirely sure if this technically counts as romantasy (I never really understood the exact definition of the subgenre or where the line is between it, romantic fantasy, or fantasy with a romance subplot), this has been on my radar for a while.
In Reforged I struggled with emotional investment in the characters as a whole and the romance in particular, including the lack of chemistry between the main couple, and the political intrigue plot was just fine. In Reclaimed, I had none of those issues.
I really enjoyed Saba as a main character. The plot throws you right into him being interrogated as the main suspect for a terrorism attack focussed on the refugee population within the city. We also learn about Saba being a refugee himself and being demoted for it, as well as that he feels responsible and is struggling with guilt and grief, despite being very clearly innocent. Enter Luan Zek, an ambassador sent to investigate the death of one of his countrymen, who may or may not have died in the terrorism attack.
Zek and Saba have tangible chemistry from the very start that quickly goes beyond physical attraction. That physical attraction is sometimes at odds with the gravity of the plot, but even that dissonance is very well integrated into the plot and actively acknowledged by the narrative.
It also plays a role in Saba's self perception, as his internal struggle with his own identity as a trans man and dysphoria in particular is a big theme in the book. The way his feelings about being trans was integrated into the narrative and plot was very well done - it's not a book about being trans, but him being trans have direct impacts on the events of the book and are a huge motivating factor, which I thought was very cleverly done. I also appreciated the nuanced conversations about the complicated feelings Saba has towards his body and sex due to his identity and dysphoria. The book and setting is largely accepting of his identity, though there are a few instances of misgendering and deadnaming, as Saba's past is a whole other plot point (that has a positive ending!)
Saba's past is probably the narratively weakest part of the book. It's not really a spoiler as I personally found it very clear what was going on very early in the book, but it's not technically revealed directly on-page until later. Either way, for me there were a lot of unanswered questions how he ended up in his position at the time of start of the book, and his childhood, especially in combination with his brother. That relationship was probably also the one I was the most disatisfied with while reading. I would have loved with the sibling dynamic to be more explore, or more clearly be labelled as estranged (?) on-page.
The combination of worldbuilding, intrigue, mystery and romance was super well done here. Reclaimed plays in a completely different country from Reforged, with a very different culture. The worldbuilding is very detailed and quite complex, at times maybe a bit too much so, but I enjoyed the nuance and consistency here, as well as how the main culture contrasts with that of characters who come from other countries.
Another thing I enjoyed was how Zek as a love interest, while strong, is also fat and described as such on page. He is also disabled due to a war injury. The casual integration of both his size and his disability was handled very well in my (admittedly limited) understanding.
Given both Saba and Zek's background, the romance as such was very much not gentle. But that grit and bite was exactly what made it so wonderful. It was a lot about respect and understanding, even as they challenge and push each other.
Overall this was a wonderful tense fantasy mystery with a great trans protagonist and nuanced romance.
November 11, 2024
Rispetto ai due libri precedenti, mi è parso che l'autore abbia cercato di evolvere il proprio stile, sia a livello di trama sia a livello di come esprimerla. E devo dire che all'inizio per quanto mi riguarda aveva funzionato parecchio. La presenza di un unico POV era interessante nell'evoluzione della storia d'amore dato che dovevamo interpretare le azioni di Zek e c'era una trama mezza gialla interessante con anche un buon twist a metà.
Non essendo trans non me la sento di dire troppo riguardo al personaggio di Saba (c'è tanta disforia che non so se possa essere triggerante per qualcuno) ma mi è piaciuto molto come la sua transessualità si intersechi alla trama (non obbligatorio, per me, ma qui funziona benissimo). Il suo personaggio funziona molto. Troppo, al punto che a una certa succhia troppa energia alla trama e benché resti una storia interessante da leggere, semplicemente smette di essere un romance e diventa una storia introspettiva di accettazione di sé.
Secondo me il migliore dei tre, ma paradossalmente rimango convinta che il primo a livello romance fosse meglio.
Non essendo trans non me la sento di dire troppo riguardo al personaggio di Saba (c'è tanta disforia che non so se possa essere triggerante per qualcuno) ma mi è piaciuto molto come la sua transessualità si intersechi alla trama (non obbligatorio, per me, ma qui funziona benissimo). Il suo personaggio funziona molto. Troppo, al punto che a una certa succhia troppa energia alla trama e benché resti una storia interessante da leggere, semplicemente smette di essere un romance e diventa una storia introspettiva di accettazione di sé.
Secondo me il migliore dei tre, ma paradossalmente rimango convinta che il primo a livello romance fosse meglio.
September 10, 2024
I reveived an arc from booksirens, thank you!
The best part of Reclaimed is it's worldbuilding. I see a lot of passion has gone into this project, and especially the opening scenes paint a strong picture of the town the story takes place in, and the catastrophe that it has faced. I love the concept of the astral sea, a mystical plane of existence encroaching on the world.
The main issues I had with the book were the romance and the prose. The romance between scorned scholar Saba Vasili and bearish ambassador Luan Zek has a very strong, tense start but quickly falls flat, progressing too quickly and rushing to eliminate any tensions that arise. It's very "oh but he couldn't care for me" while the text contradicts this making it VERY apparent that Zek can and does in fact care for Saba. If the reader was shown any reason to doubt Zek's affections this would be a more interesting question, but they are painfully obvious, even as Saba's insecurities and gender dysphoria have him doubting Zek. It's almost as if the author was afraid to show zek in a questionable light, the narration makes sure that we know he's a Good Person. Saba is allowed a little more wiggle room to be nuanced. The book speedruns a deep romace in a handful of days, losing any emotional weight.
The prose is perhaps the biggest problem. The narration spends too much time ensuring that we know exactly how Saba is feeling, describing his emotions constantly, giving the text an on the nose, juvenile quality. Much more could be left for the reader to parse out: instead the need to make sure the reader knows what is going through Saba's head breaks the immersion when it constantly interrupts any and all action that is happening. The detailed descriptions of places and clothes and people also begin to lose their effectiveness, becoming exhausting after a while. Sometimes less is more. The prose makes even the plot drag and eventually lose all tension.
As for how the book handles the topics of disability and transness which I love and which hit home as personal experiences... Unfortunately for Zek, his physical disability, his "bad leg", remains his only personality trait alongside Good. And while I appreciate Saba as a messy trans man with a mean streak and complicated emotions, I found it difficult, also as transmasc, to read in detail about his self hatred. This is more personal of an opinion than the previous and I'm sure other readers will find it cathartic, he does have a very happy ending. For me it was all in all a tedious journey.
I think with more streamlining of the prose Reclaimed could immediately rise a couple of stars in rating for me. For now I have to say I do not recommend it, which is a shame because I genuinely enjoyed the world it builds and I see that a lot of passion has gone into it.
The best part of Reclaimed is it's worldbuilding. I see a lot of passion has gone into this project, and especially the opening scenes paint a strong picture of the town the story takes place in, and the catastrophe that it has faced. I love the concept of the astral sea, a mystical plane of existence encroaching on the world.
The main issues I had with the book were the romance and the prose. The romance between scorned scholar Saba Vasili and bearish ambassador Luan Zek has a very strong, tense start but quickly falls flat, progressing too quickly and rushing to eliminate any tensions that arise. It's very "oh but he couldn't care for me" while the text contradicts this making it VERY apparent that Zek can and does in fact care for Saba. If the reader was shown any reason to doubt Zek's affections this would be a more interesting question, but they are painfully obvious, even as Saba's insecurities and gender dysphoria have him doubting Zek. It's almost as if the author was afraid to show zek in a questionable light, the narration makes sure that we know he's a Good Person. Saba is allowed a little more wiggle room to be nuanced. The book speedruns a deep romace in a handful of days, losing any emotional weight.
The prose is perhaps the biggest problem. The narration spends too much time ensuring that we know exactly how Saba is feeling, describing his emotions constantly, giving the text an on the nose, juvenile quality. Much more could be left for the reader to parse out: instead the need to make sure the reader knows what is going through Saba's head breaks the immersion when it constantly interrupts any and all action that is happening. The detailed descriptions of places and clothes and people also begin to lose their effectiveness, becoming exhausting after a while. Sometimes less is more. The prose makes even the plot drag and eventually lose all tension.
As for how the book handles the topics of disability and transness which I love and which hit home as personal experiences... Unfortunately for Zek, his physical disability, his "bad leg", remains his only personality trait alongside Good. And while I appreciate Saba as a messy trans man with a mean streak and complicated emotions, I found it difficult, also as transmasc, to read in detail about his self hatred. This is more personal of an opinion than the previous and I'm sure other readers will find it cathartic, he does have a very happy ending. For me it was all in all a tedious journey.
I think with more streamlining of the prose Reclaimed could immediately rise a couple of stars in rating for me. For now I have to say I do not recommend it, which is a shame because I genuinely enjoyed the world it builds and I see that a lot of passion has gone into it.
Read
October 16, 2024Why I read it: I've already reviewed this author's first and second books in this series, and I liked both of them quite a bit, and this is the third (and final[?]) book (though Goodreads apparently lists a prequel to Reforged as coming out in January) in the series before the author moves on to other things.
Thoughts: I don't think I talk too much about how I'm trans -- I certainly don't talk about it as often as I think about it. But it definitely shapes how I read certain books, or whether or not I read certain books in the first place. I just wanted to write that right here at the start of my review, since this is a book with a trans protagonist. Ironically, it was fanfiction of a certain male character reimagined as a trans man that made me think, "Hold up, this fictional character is allowed to transition and be happy and I'm not?!" that gave me the impetus to start actively reimagining (and eventually remaking) myself, rather than just wishing I'd been born different. But for all that, I've actually been hesitant to read stories where trans men are protagonists. I think that to be trans is to be alone, somehow, probably because so much of my trans experience has been internal, self-examining and self-judgmental, weighing and considering. It's all very who am I? what am I? why am I?, all me, me, me. So the idea that a novel could explore someone's identity the way I explored my identity and that I could read about that has always sort of given me the heebie-jeebies, to tell you the truth. It's hard not to feel weird about being trans, even when I'm around people who don't know who I was before (there's a lot of paranoia about passing, though less so since my facial hair improved its game, oh, and also I had surgery), and it's extra weird when I'm around people who do know. It would be even harder to not feel weird if the character whose identity is explored doesn't align with mine -- if I'm somehow alienated from my own identity and my own "people". Which is even ridiculous to consider, since everyone's experience of their identity is different. It would be strange if every book with a trans protagonist had the exact same outlook.
Anyway, all that to say that I was apprehensive about reading Reclaimed even though I've known for ages now that the protagonist was a trans man, and then there was the cover reveal, which honestly still makes me feel giddy, and of course I'd preordered it anyway because lol ofc I'm going to support this author. And all that nervousness just to find that so much of Saba Vasili's identity does align with mine. A lot of his experiences are my experiences. A lot of his self-doubt has been my self-doubt. And more importantly, by the end of the book, a lot of his joy has been my joy. I don't actually know if the author is trans, I don't know if he's just got really good research skills and advisors and editors, I don't know if he has or has had friends or family or, uh, close personal pals of an intimate nature who are trans, and while my natural nosiness means I'd like to know, in the end it makes no difference. The end result is that he's written a book where I've highlighted passages just to go "oh I feel this" and "this is so real" and, on one occasion "for the amount of money it cost to chop off my breasts and the tedious recovery, my scars should be iridescent and imbued with weird magic, too!"
Story-wise... I feel like the plot is second fiddle to Saba's journey of self-actualisation, which maybe isn't the most interesting approach, but the book went by really fast anyway, so I guess it wasn't all bad. I did like that the plot revolved around the astrok-mer, and the resolution that was presented here, limited though it may be (though can it ever be anything but limited, considering it's a realm of wild magic that a lot of people think of as a god and others as merely a place), was satisying enough for a capstone to this story setting. I also liked that the story was set in yet another different kingdom than the previous two books, and the vibe was completely different to previously described places, which is very important as far as world-building goes, and also just very cool of the author. I would also like the author to write little touristy guides to all the kingdoms and towns he's come up with for this books, because I want to know about any other literal-hole-in-the-wall restaurants who only serve... what was it, again, goat and lentil stew?
The downside is that the pacing was off, sometimes. In between bouts of Saba's mental self-flagellation, things still happened, but sometimes they were rushed and sometimes they took way too long, which in turn also throws the stakes out of whack. There was a sense of urgency at the start, as Saba, feeling very guilty about what happened just prior to the start of the novel, is eager to find answers and solutions, but then it feels like it crawls to a... crawl... as they then don't really have much input for a period of time, while other characters do things in the background, without Saba's participation. The stakes also seem high around the midway point, when Saba and his multicultural gang head into the underdark/black market area of town, but then nothing really happens beyond Saba getting his Magic Testosterone script refilled (again, where is my magic flower decoction???????) and a make-out with Zek in a dark corner, which really undermines the build-up sequence where Saba and Zek have to disguise themselves. There's never a real sense of danger, and I felt that lack keenly.
Finally, sadly, the romance angle was third fiddle to... all of everything else. It was sweet and believable (I'd also fall in love with Luan Zek if I was in Saba's shoes, with exactly the same amounts of expedience and reticence), and the pacing of it was believable, considering what Saba and Zek were working on, but I wanted so much more of it, so I'm not going to tag this as #romance. While romance is there, this novel is a lot more concerned with politics and Saba's personal journey. And I also feel, personally, that there should have been a lot more sex scenes. One just wasn't enough.
Final notes: I personally liked that this book only had one POV character, for a change, mostly because of the Trans Experience™ and for that, this book is very close to my heart; but from a less personal perspective, I think including Zek's POV as well might have broken up the long stretches of Saba's tragic demeanour and added a lot more content and context on Zek, which I desperately wanted. For plot and characters, Reborn, the second book in the trilogy, is better. Still: no regrets, and I'll read whatever Seth Haddon comes up with next.
Thoughts: I don't think I talk too much about how I'm trans -- I certainly don't talk about it as often as I think about it. But it definitely shapes how I read certain books, or whether or not I read certain books in the first place. I just wanted to write that right here at the start of my review, since this is a book with a trans protagonist. Ironically, it was fanfiction of a certain male character reimagined as a trans man that made me think, "Hold up, this fictional character is allowed to transition and be happy and I'm not?!" that gave me the impetus to start actively reimagining (and eventually remaking) myself, rather than just wishing I'd been born different. But for all that, I've actually been hesitant to read stories where trans men are protagonists. I think that to be trans is to be alone, somehow, probably because so much of my trans experience has been internal, self-examining and self-judgmental, weighing and considering. It's all very who am I? what am I? why am I?, all me, me, me. So the idea that a novel could explore someone's identity the way I explored my identity and that I could read about that has always sort of given me the heebie-jeebies, to tell you the truth. It's hard not to feel weird about being trans, even when I'm around people who don't know who I was before (there's a lot of paranoia about passing, though less so since my facial hair improved its game, oh, and also I had surgery), and it's extra weird when I'm around people who do know. It would be even harder to not feel weird if the character whose identity is explored doesn't align with mine -- if I'm somehow alienated from my own identity and my own "people". Which is even ridiculous to consider, since everyone's experience of their identity is different. It would be strange if every book with a trans protagonist had the exact same outlook.
Anyway, all that to say that I was apprehensive about reading Reclaimed even though I've known for ages now that the protagonist was a trans man, and then there was the cover reveal, which honestly still makes me feel giddy, and of course I'd preordered it anyway because lol ofc I'm going to support this author. And all that nervousness just to find that so much of Saba Vasili's identity does align with mine. A lot of his experiences are my experiences. A lot of his self-doubt has been my self-doubt. And more importantly, by the end of the book, a lot of his joy has been my joy. I don't actually know if the author is trans, I don't know if he's just got really good research skills and advisors and editors, I don't know if he has or has had friends or family or, uh, close personal pals of an intimate nature who are trans, and while my natural nosiness means I'd like to know, in the end it makes no difference. The end result is that he's written a book where I've highlighted passages just to go "oh I feel this" and "this is so real" and, on one occasion "for the amount of money it cost to chop off my breasts and the tedious recovery, my scars should be iridescent and imbued with weird magic, too!"
Story-wise... I feel like the plot is second fiddle to Saba's journey of self-actualisation, which maybe isn't the most interesting approach, but the book went by really fast anyway, so I guess it wasn't all bad. I did like that the plot revolved around the astrok-mer, and the resolution that was presented here, limited though it may be (though can it ever be anything but limited, considering it's a realm of wild magic that a lot of people think of as a god and others as merely a place), was satisying enough for a capstone to this story setting. I also liked that the story was set in yet another different kingdom than the previous two books, and the vibe was completely different to previously described places, which is very important as far as world-building goes, and also just very cool of the author. I would also like the author to write little touristy guides to all the kingdoms and towns he's come up with for this books, because I want to know about any other literal-hole-in-the-wall restaurants who only serve... what was it, again, goat and lentil stew?
The downside is that the pacing was off, sometimes. In between bouts of Saba's mental self-flagellation, things still happened, but sometimes they were rushed and sometimes they took way too long, which in turn also throws the stakes out of whack. There was a sense of urgency at the start, as Saba, feeling very guilty about what happened just prior to the start of the novel, is eager to find answers and solutions, but then it feels like it crawls to a... crawl... as they then don't really have much input for a period of time, while other characters do things in the background, without Saba's participation. The stakes also seem high around the midway point, when Saba and his multicultural gang head into the underdark/black market area of town, but then nothing really happens beyond Saba getting his Magic Testosterone script refilled (again, where is my magic flower decoction???????) and a make-out with Zek in a dark corner, which really undermines the build-up sequence where Saba and Zek have to disguise themselves. There's never a real sense of danger, and I felt that lack keenly.
Finally, sadly, the romance angle was third fiddle to... all of everything else. It was sweet and believable (I'd also fall in love with Luan Zek if I was in Saba's shoes, with exactly the same amounts of expedience and reticence), and the pacing of it was believable, considering what Saba and Zek were working on, but I wanted so much more of it, so I'm not going to tag this as #romance. While romance is there, this novel is a lot more concerned with politics and Saba's personal journey. And I also feel, personally, that there should have been a lot more sex scenes. One just wasn't enough.
Final notes: I personally liked that this book only had one POV character, for a change, mostly because of the Trans Experience™ and for that, this book is very close to my heart; but from a less personal perspective, I think including Zek's POV as well might have broken up the long stretches of Saba's tragic demeanour and added a lot more content and context on Zek, which I desperately wanted. For plot and characters, Reborn, the second book in the trilogy, is better. Still: no regrets, and I'll read whatever Seth Haddon comes up with next.
June 19, 2024
received an ARC in exchange of an honest review.
"at least your feelings make sense, zek. yours feel legitimate, and mine feel--insane, yet also inevitable. i've met people like me who are truly happy with themselves, and i don't know how they do it. i don't know if they lie to themsevels until they feel it's true, or if it's genuine. or if i'm broken and should be happy with what i have--grateful i can at least be this. but my body feels like a stopping place, halfway between destinations. and i'll never quite get to where i'm meant to be going. if i think too long about it, about my configuration, or about how i move through this world, how i feel i should have been been--it hurts. you could say anything, and it would still hurt."
this book got me through 3 sick days away from work, and it was such an awesome journey.
first and foremost, this book is such an intimate celebration (at the very least, if not an actual love letter) of the trans body, and i think saddon did a fantastic job depicting the trans experience. as a trans person, reading the book felt like having a two-way conversation with saddon, rather than just being explained and presented through saba what being trans means.
i gotta admit, sometimes saba's self disgust and hatred and anguish hit a bit too close to home. it mirrored mine so well that by the end of the book, i was quite jealous of his relationship with zek and how far he's come haha. an i definitely related to his desperation in achieving the body he wants, to the point he [redacted]. though, he definitely had more remorse than i would've, but that's because my morals are a lot looser than his :)
"saba stared at him. it was one thing to dislike his body, to see the movement of the skin around his scarred chest and grimace, to touch the width of his hips and feel a visceral, aching disgust. to feel all that, and to have someone else--like it?"
"if saba could be attractive to someone else, then his dislike of his body moved from an inmutable truth [...] to something much less all-consuming."
"internally, a thousand emotions had flooded his sytem, emotions that had been dredged up from an ancient, primitive part of his brain. that part was screaming, whooping, crying. the inherent vulnerability of being recognized or seen was one thing. to be appreciated? to have zek look at his, acknowledge him, and still look at his with a gleam in his eye? it was too much."
and yes, i do understand the catalyst to saba's change was himself (simply put, to avoid spoilers) but i always had a soft spot for the theme of 'someone loves you so much that it makes you love yourself'. especially when i can't really envision myself in saba's situation, the quotes hit me that much harder.
what can i say, it just hurts so good to hate yourself and have someone else love you (your body) so irrevocably and selflessly that your whole perception of yourself gets shaken up, of the world and how it works. sigh.
moving on, i gotta admit, this book would've already been a 4.5/5 stars, if not for the (spoilers ahead?) sex scene at the end. very hot very sexy very rewarding. i'm glad their dynamics (wink wink) got brought up again. definitely bumped it up to 5 stars.
"at least your feelings make sense, zek. yours feel legitimate, and mine feel--insane, yet also inevitable. i've met people like me who are truly happy with themselves, and i don't know how they do it. i don't know if they lie to themsevels until they feel it's true, or if it's genuine. or if i'm broken and should be happy with what i have--grateful i can at least be this. but my body feels like a stopping place, halfway between destinations. and i'll never quite get to where i'm meant to be going. if i think too long about it, about my configuration, or about how i move through this world, how i feel i should have been been--it hurts. you could say anything, and it would still hurt."
this book got me through 3 sick days away from work, and it was such an awesome journey.
first and foremost, this book is such an intimate celebration (at the very least, if not an actual love letter) of the trans body, and i think saddon did a fantastic job depicting the trans experience. as a trans person, reading the book felt like having a two-way conversation with saddon, rather than just being explained and presented through saba what being trans means.
i gotta admit, sometimes saba's self disgust and hatred and anguish hit a bit too close to home. it mirrored mine so well that by the end of the book, i was quite jealous of his relationship with zek and how far he's come haha. an i definitely related to his desperation in achieving the body he wants, to the point he [redacted]. though, he definitely had more remorse than i would've, but that's because my morals are a lot looser than his :)
"saba stared at him. it was one thing to dislike his body, to see the movement of the skin around his scarred chest and grimace, to touch the width of his hips and feel a visceral, aching disgust. to feel all that, and to have someone else--like it?"
"if saba could be attractive to someone else, then his dislike of his body moved from an inmutable truth [...] to something much less all-consuming."
"internally, a thousand emotions had flooded his sytem, emotions that had been dredged up from an ancient, primitive part of his brain. that part was screaming, whooping, crying. the inherent vulnerability of being recognized or seen was one thing. to be appreciated? to have zek look at his, acknowledge him, and still look at his with a gleam in his eye? it was too much."
and yes, i do understand the catalyst to saba's change was himself (simply put, to avoid spoilers) but i always had a soft spot for the theme of 'someone loves you so much that it makes you love yourself'. especially when i can't really envision myself in saba's situation, the quotes hit me that much harder.
what can i say, it just hurts so good to hate yourself and have someone else love you (your body) so irrevocably and selflessly that your whole perception of yourself gets shaken up, of the world and how it works. sigh.
moving on, i gotta admit, this book would've already been a 4.5/5 stars, if not for the (spoilers ahead?) sex scene at the end. very hot very sexy very rewarding. i'm glad their dynamics (wink wink) got brought up again. definitely bumped it up to 5 stars.
July 14, 2025
Okay! I went from thinking this was a trans fantasy whodunnit to unfortunately realizing this *might* be a colonizer romance and then finally, to seeing it as a journey of trans acceptance and self-love.
Saba is a compelling main character, and that's what makes it hard to read his perspective at times. Particularly, his moments of body and gender dysphoria and self-hate. He has spent a long time hating and feeling guilt, and feeling so so desperate that he realizes this very cruel accident might just be his fault. I loved seeing his character arc in complete circle. I know his journey with his transness and gender identity is just one of the many experiences of actual, real-life trans people.
ALSO the romance. It was interesting for sure. Although, I might be one of the few who were not sold with the chemistry immediately. It just felt like a little too rushed, with nothing really significant happening. Like just a few scenes/days of meeting Zek, Saba is already taken with him? (or maybe my demiromantic side just don't get it??) And yeah, there's the fact that Zek is Saba's colonizer (or ex?? colonizer??) I never want to read colonizer romance so I almost gave up on this one lmao. Zek was a loyalist soldier directly involved in the expansion of his empire and the downfall of Saba's country. So yes I had conflicting feelings about that. I did like the clarity that Zek has long realized his wrongdoings, even before meeting Saba (thank fuck). And more about Zek was revealed later on. I think people will really swoon in the last few chapters. The disability rep though, (Zek has an injured leg and is a cane-user), I think that was well done as well.
The plot is interesting, though a little predictable. I like the mystery, and the magic, and the political intrigue elements of the plot. The political elements in particular mirrors real life bigotry and racism, and well, that hits hard as well. Have to say though, the pacing is a little inconsistent. (This might just be being nitpicky) First 20-ish% of this book was so fast and so intriguing. And then it stalled a little bit, like nothing is happening. And then picked up again around the third act (thank goodness for that).
Overall, this was a rollercoaster ride. But I enjoyed that nonetheless.
Exact rating: 3.75
(Read for the Indie Ink Awards 2024!)
Saba is a compelling main character, and that's what makes it hard to read his perspective at times. Particularly, his moments of body and gender dysphoria and self-hate. He has spent a long time hating and feeling guilt, and feeling so so desperate that he realizes this very cruel accident might just be his fault. I loved seeing his character arc in complete circle. I know his journey with his transness and gender identity is just one of the many experiences of actual, real-life trans people.
ALSO the romance. It was interesting for sure. Although, I might be one of the few who were not sold with the chemistry immediately. It just felt like a little too rushed, with nothing really significant happening. Like just a few scenes/days of meeting Zek, Saba is already taken with him? (or maybe my demiromantic side just don't get it??) And yeah, there's the fact that Zek is Saba's colonizer (or ex?? colonizer??) I never want to read colonizer romance so I almost gave up on this one lmao. Zek was a loyalist soldier directly involved in the expansion of his empire and the downfall of Saba's country. So yes I had conflicting feelings about that. I did like the clarity that Zek has long realized his wrongdoings, even before meeting Saba (thank fuck). And more about Zek was revealed later on. I think people will really swoon in the last few chapters. The disability rep though, (Zek has an injured leg and is a cane-user), I think that was well done as well.
The plot is interesting, though a little predictable. I like the mystery, and the magic, and the political intrigue elements of the plot. The political elements in particular mirrors real life bigotry and racism, and well, that hits hard as well. Have to say though, the pacing is a little inconsistent. (This might just be being nitpicky) First 20-ish% of this book was so fast and so intriguing. And then it stalled a little bit, like nothing is happening. And then picked up again around the third act (thank goodness for that).
Overall, this was a rollercoaster ride. But I enjoyed that nonetheless.
Exact rating: 3.75
(Read for the Indie Ink Awards 2024!)
[ Marking this book as part of my reading challenge: Read Queerly 2025.
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October 28, 2024
Ahhhh! It's out! I was lucky enough to snag an arc of this book and I'm so grateful!! 🖤
4⭐️ this is one of those books thag makes you wanna go back and read the whole series | tropes: trans mmc, mystery, forced proximity | digital
"His desire felt childish and inane; he craved the attention of his enemy, his keeper."
characters
🩶 I loved Saba immediately. He is smart, sharp tongued, at a little crazy. I liked seeing all his complicated thoughts on his work, his legacy, and his identity. He is honestly the highlight of this book and I loved seeing his journey. He battled so much inside himself and I just can't say enough how much I adored him.
🩶I loved Zek as well! He is a complicated figure, struggling with this past in the war and the scars it left on him inside and out.
"He wanted Zek to want him, wanted to be had by him, and at the same time had the urge to eviscerate himself. Scrape out all the organs, the wet mess of them, the blood, the fat, the bone. He wanted to be empty. He wanted his body to be empty; he wanted to evacuate it, leave it completely, run for the hills. For the astral sea itself."
favorite bits
🖤 This book starts dark yet so fun. There was a lot of world-building to do pretty quickly. The fantasy world in this feels fleshed out with real people with realistic thoughts and reactions to things happening around them. I need to read the other books in this world.
🖤 Saba was down bad for Zek and the yearning was strong! Their romance was very much a slow burn but so worth it. Outside of their attraction to each other, I loved their conversations about war, politics, and survival.
🖤I liked how many small details strung together and ended up being connected as the story went on.
"...whatever this is, if you entertain this feeling in any meaningful way, you will be vivisected."
issues
❌ The amount exposition at the beginning was rough. I understand there's a lot to establish but it felt like it was unending. There would be a brief break of dialogue and then pages of thoughts explaining the world and its politics.
❌ I did feel like the story did star to get muddled towards the end. I don't think is on the writing quality but my own interest in the resolution and where it was going. There were so many great parts of the overall plot being unraveled but I did find myself wanting it wrapped up by like 80%. Again, I blame this on my being a romance / romantasy reader.
"No one had defended Saba like that before. Or rather, no one had defended him since he’d become Saba."
final thoughts:
This was a piece of art like especially as a character centered reader like Saba's journey was a masterpiece.
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4⭐️ this is one of those books thag makes you wanna go back and read the whole series | tropes: trans mmc, mystery, forced proximity | digital
"His desire felt childish and inane; he craved the attention of his enemy, his keeper."
characters
🩶 I loved Saba immediately. He is smart, sharp tongued, at a little crazy. I liked seeing all his complicated thoughts on his work, his legacy, and his identity. He is honestly the highlight of this book and I loved seeing his journey. He battled so much inside himself and I just can't say enough how much I adored him.
🩶I loved Zek as well! He is a complicated figure, struggling with this past in the war and the scars it left on him inside and out.
"He wanted Zek to want him, wanted to be had by him, and at the same time had the urge to eviscerate himself. Scrape out all the organs, the wet mess of them, the blood, the fat, the bone. He wanted to be empty. He wanted his body to be empty; he wanted to evacuate it, leave it completely, run for the hills. For the astral sea itself."
favorite bits
🖤 This book starts dark yet so fun. There was a lot of world-building to do pretty quickly. The fantasy world in this feels fleshed out with real people with realistic thoughts and reactions to things happening around them. I need to read the other books in this world.
🖤 Saba was down bad for Zek and the yearning was strong! Their romance was very much a slow burn but so worth it. Outside of their attraction to each other, I loved their conversations about war, politics, and survival.
🖤I liked how many small details strung together and ended up being connected as the story went on.
"...whatever this is, if you entertain this feeling in any meaningful way, you will be vivisected."
issues
❌ The amount exposition at the beginning was rough. I understand there's a lot to establish but it felt like it was unending. There would be a brief break of dialogue and then pages of thoughts explaining the world and its politics.
❌ I did feel like the story did star to get muddled towards the end. I don't think is on the writing quality but my own interest in the resolution and where it was going. There were so many great parts of the overall plot being unraveled but I did find myself wanting it wrapped up by like 80%. Again, I blame this on my being a romance / romantasy reader.
"No one had defended Saba like that before. Or rather, no one had defended him since he’d become Saba."
final thoughts:
This was a piece of art like especially as a character centered reader like Saba's journey was a masterpiece.
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September 25, 2024
I really enjoyed Reclaimed!
It's about Saba, a scholar of the astral sea who has been incarcerated and charged with murder as he had designed an arcane device that malfunctioned and destroyed an entire city district and killed a foreign dignitary.
Zek, an ambassador, sent to take custody of the alleged murderer of his countryman. But he questions whether Saba is truly guilty or only a scapegoat.
With the city's fate in the balance, they must uncover the truth and stop the device that is jeopardizing the fabric of their whole world.
I really did enjoy this book it was a great fantasy read!
The world that the author has created was amazing, and I especially was fascinated by the astral sea and thought everything was done so well.
I really loved the characters so much, and they were definitely my favourite part! Saba was an amazing character, and I really felt for him and his struggles with accepting himself and related to him hating his own body. I also really loved his feral side! Zek was such a great character as well and was perfect for Saba, and I just loved their romance so much.
I also loved Moss as she was the absolute sweetest!
Reclaimed is the third book in a series of interconnected books set in the same world, but all of them can be read as standalones.
Other than this one, I've actually read Reforged and enjoyed it just as much as this one!
I'm definitely planning to read Reborn soon, which is the only one i haven't read yet!
All in all, this really was a great book that i'd highly recommend!
If you are interested in a queer fantasy that has a trans mc, disabled love interest, enemies to lovers romance, magic, mystery, and more, then this is the book for you!
It's about Saba, a scholar of the astral sea who has been incarcerated and charged with murder as he had designed an arcane device that malfunctioned and destroyed an entire city district and killed a foreign dignitary.
Zek, an ambassador, sent to take custody of the alleged murderer of his countryman. But he questions whether Saba is truly guilty or only a scapegoat.
With the city's fate in the balance, they must uncover the truth and stop the device that is jeopardizing the fabric of their whole world.
I really did enjoy this book it was a great fantasy read!
The world that the author has created was amazing, and I especially was fascinated by the astral sea and thought everything was done so well.
I really loved the characters so much, and they were definitely my favourite part! Saba was an amazing character, and I really felt for him and his struggles with accepting himself and related to him hating his own body. I also really loved his feral side! Zek was such a great character as well and was perfect for Saba, and I just loved their romance so much.
I also loved Moss as she was the absolute sweetest!
Reclaimed is the third book in a series of interconnected books set in the same world, but all of them can be read as standalones.
Other than this one, I've actually read Reforged and enjoyed it just as much as this one!
I'm definitely planning to read Reborn soon, which is the only one i haven't read yet!
All in all, this really was a great book that i'd highly recommend!
If you are interested in a queer fantasy that has a trans mc, disabled love interest, enemies to lovers romance, magic, mystery, and more, then this is the book for you!
June 17, 2024
I am going to open this review by saying this was phenomenal. I have not read a Seth Haddon book before this, though I’ve known of them. This book’s cover instantly gripped me. It’s rare, I feel, to find books in the adult genre with transmasculine main characters, or fat (and disabled!) love interests. This book has both. I’m tickled.
I related a lot to Saba. His trans rage, his dysphoria. Feeling unworthy, hating your body because it doesn’t look how you feel it’s supposed to. The self-sabotage that came about from his internalized transphobia. His journey as a transman was raw, and it was rewarding.
Zek as a character, and as a love interest, was the perfect counterweight to Saba’s feral personality—a well-mannered man with a mind for truth, always calm, always patient, always kind. When Saba would bite, Zek held out his hand anyway. Their romance was a slowburn; they needed time to learn and grow as individuals before committing entirely to each other. I usually get bored quickly without love or sex, but I was invested in them, and was excited to see it through. The wait was worth it.
The writing was fantastic, some of the best I’ve read in a while. It was intelligent and vivid; I don’t think I felt confused even once the entire book, not about what was happening or what things looked like. The storyline itself was gripping as well: uncovering the mystery behind a disgraced scholar’s device having gone haywire. I won’t say too much, in fear I’ll spoil something, but it’s good. Really good.
This book was a 4.5/5 for me, and I cannot recommend it enough. I can’t wait to get my hands on a physical copy and read it all over again. I implore you: give this one a try.
I was provided an e-ARC by the author in exchange for an honest review.
July 27, 2024
Did you all know that romance was invented by this book? I truly believe it because the way Seth Haddon wrote the relationship between Saba and Luan was so incredibly beautiful and it made me want to swing my legs while reading. And it was also so nicely incorporated into the plot that I didn't feel like it was taking away from everything else. The mystery of trying to find the real culprit who accused Saba of destroying a whole part of the city was intriuguing and there was also time to unpack not only Saba's past and his secrets, but also relationships with his friends, family, and the people who were not so happy to see him thrive.
The writing did a lot, too. There are beautiful descriptions of Saba's emotions, making it so easy to feel the things he feels while he's trying to stop the device from taking more of the city. Also the whole dilemma about his perfect-self he faces was such an interesting part of the story and made it even more interesting to read.
Last thing I would love to point out about Reclaimed is Luan Zek and how not only his disability was handled through the story, but also how positively his body type was presented. It was actually so nice to see a plus size love interest in romantasy.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
The writing did a lot, too. There are beautiful descriptions of Saba's emotions, making it so easy to feel the things he feels while he's trying to stop the device from taking more of the city. Also the whole dilemma about his perfect-self he faces was such an interesting part of the story and made it even more interesting to read.
Last thing I would love to point out about Reclaimed is Luan Zek and how not only his disability was handled through the story, but also how positively his body type was presented. It was actually so nice to see a plus size love interest in romantasy.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
July 23, 2025
There are not enough trans MM romances out there and this one hits it out of the park! Out of all the books in this series I think this is the best one by far because it has a romance you root for. The leads balanced out each other really well personality wise and I believed that they would be a lasting couple. Since this is a fantasy romance series sadly you can’t just jump to this book because you need all the lore from prior stories. I will also give a content warning that this book deals with a lot of gender dysphoria and discussions of colonialism/genocide. The world is currently a real nightmare so I totally understand why you might not want to engage with that.
October 8, 2024
Reclaimed is a story of self acceptance and romance entangled in academic and political intrigue. Saba And Luan Zek set out to prove Saba’s innocence and decipher the cause of the malfunctioning device in order to stop the catastrophe from spreading.
Past and present collide in Saba’s struggle with his sense of self and bodily disconnect that the author did a really enjoyable job of portraying in the essence of his writing. Zek is an overall cinnamon roll of a character to the cloud of doom and sass that is Saba. They are a lovely grumpy/Sunshine pairing. (My favorite!)
The world building spread throughout the
“Re-“ series is excellent and ever expanding, providing a sense of world complexity that isn’t often well portrayed in interconnected series.
I’m happy to have been part of Seth Haddons street team for Reclaimed, book #3 in the Reforged series. My review is voluntary are based purely on my own impression of the novel. Thank you again for the e-Arc it is a gem!
Past and present collide in Saba’s struggle with his sense of self and bodily disconnect that the author did a really enjoyable job of portraying in the essence of his writing. Zek is an overall cinnamon roll of a character to the cloud of doom and sass that is Saba. They are a lovely grumpy/Sunshine pairing. (My favorite!)
The world building spread throughout the
“Re-“ series is excellent and ever expanding, providing a sense of world complexity that isn’t often well portrayed in interconnected series.
I’m happy to have been part of Seth Haddons street team for Reclaimed, book #3 in the Reforged series. My review is voluntary are based purely on my own impression of the novel. Thank you again for the e-Arc it is a gem!
October 15, 2024
A profound message of self acceptance and loving yourself where you’re at- not because you should never change or never want to, but because you deserve love at every stage of who you are.
This book was really beautiful and I feel like it has the full package- it has a meaningful message, interesting concept and magic system, a good amount of action or suspense, and a beautiful romance.
I’ve read a lot of books esp fantasy romance but it feels like this one is truly unique.
Thank you BookSirens for the ARC of this book. This is my voluntary review.
This book was really beautiful and I feel like it has the full package- it has a meaningful message, interesting concept and magic system, a good amount of action or suspense, and a beautiful romance.
I’ve read a lot of books esp fantasy romance but it feels like this one is truly unique.
Thank you BookSirens for the ARC of this book. This is my voluntary review.
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