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Selfish
Sundae Monroe Banks was born into pain.
After losing her father and being handed over to the streets by her own mother, she learned love is dangerous, and emotions are a weakness she can’t afford.
While most girls her age are picking colleges and chasing dreams, Sundae’s out here chasing survival.
Now nineteen, cold-blooded, and wise beyond her years, she stacks money, uses men, and keeps her heart locked behind walls nobody can break through.
Trust is dead. Loyalty is strictly conditional.
But when people she thought were solid start switching sides—and the past she tried to bury claws its way back—Sundae is forced to confront the one person she’s been running from… herself.
Selfish is a raw, gritty urban fiction novel packed with betrayal, heartbreak, and survival.
If you love street lit, hood love stories, and Black coming-of-age tales with real emotion and shocking twists, Selfish is a must-read.
“Because love might heal…
But sometimes, being selfish is the only way to survive.”
After losing her father and being handed over to the streets by her own mother, she learned love is dangerous, and emotions are a weakness she can’t afford.
While most girls her age are picking colleges and chasing dreams, Sundae’s out here chasing survival.
Now nineteen, cold-blooded, and wise beyond her years, she stacks money, uses men, and keeps her heart locked behind walls nobody can break through.
Trust is dead. Loyalty is strictly conditional.
But when people she thought were solid start switching sides—and the past she tried to bury claws its way back—Sundae is forced to confront the one person she’s been running from… herself.
Selfish is a raw, gritty urban fiction novel packed with betrayal, heartbreak, and survival.
If you love street lit, hood love stories, and Black coming-of-age tales with real emotion and shocking twists, Selfish is a must-read.
“Because love might heal…
But sometimes, being selfish is the only way to survive.”
376 pages, Kindle Edition
Published May 29, 2025
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 247 reviews
October 21, 2025
4.5/5
- This is a book that I will literally never be able to forget! If you enjoy urban romance, this is such a great book to pick up. It’s probably the saddest book I’ve ever read!
- Love how Sundae had so much resilience throughout the entire book! I found myself having so much empathy for her and others that have similar stories to her in real life.
- Definitely go into this book with caution because it won’t be for everyone. It’s heartbreaking. It’s raw. The writing is similar to that of most urban romances. The story is like no other!
- This is a book that I will literally never be able to forget! If you enjoy urban romance, this is such a great book to pick up. It’s probably the saddest book I’ve ever read!
- Love how Sundae had so much resilience throughout the entire book! I found myself having so much empathy for her and others that have similar stories to her in real life.
- Definitely go into this book with caution because it won’t be for everyone. It’s heartbreaking. It’s raw. The writing is similar to that of most urban romances. The story is like no other!
June 16, 2026
Definitely one of my favorite books of the year.
ONE HELL OF A COMING OF AGE STORY
I clung to every word like they were going to disappear from the page if I looked away. This story was HEAVY, gritty, painful, but needed. Sunday learned at a young age the terrors of whats really out here in this world…her MOTHER being her first bully, first pimp, and first nightmare. But when you already in hell all you can do is let it drag you further or fight to survive.
ONE HELL OF A COMING OF AGE STORY
I clung to every word like they were going to disappear from the page if I looked away. This story was HEAVY, gritty, painful, but needed. Sunday learned at a young age the terrors of whats really out here in this world…her MOTHER being her first bully, first pimp, and first nightmare. But when you already in hell all you can do is let it drag you further or fight to survive.
March 1, 2026
3.75⭐️
Why do I keep doing this to myself? Why do I keep picking up books that make me want to hug the FMC’s and tell them I love them of no one else does or will?😭
When I started this book, I knew that the writing style wasn’t going to be for me. I have a potty mouth just like the next, but that doesn’t mean that I want to read paragraph after paragraph of it, with no actual use of “real words” to express what’s happening…. Key words, when I “started” the book…🫣
About 30% in, I said F it and dived in head first!! 😂
This story was one that I couldn’t put it down. I easily could’ve read this in one sitting!
We’re following Sundae who is simply trying to keep her head above water, make ends meet and take care of her baby sister the best way she knows how. Along the way, her past (and even her present) catch up with her and she becomes a ticking time bomb.
Super vague review, I know.
It’s best you go into this not knowing too much so you can just go along for the ride.
Please please please check trigger warnings first though because my goodness there are a lot!!💔😢
Why do I keep doing this to myself? Why do I keep picking up books that make me want to hug the FMC’s and tell them I love them of no one else does or will?😭
When I started this book, I knew that the writing style wasn’t going to be for me. I have a potty mouth just like the next, but that doesn’t mean that I want to read paragraph after paragraph of it, with no actual use of “real words” to express what’s happening…. Key words, when I “started” the book…🫣
About 30% in, I said F it and dived in head first!! 😂
This story was one that I couldn’t put it down. I easily could’ve read this in one sitting!
We’re following Sundae who is simply trying to keep her head above water, make ends meet and take care of her baby sister the best way she knows how. Along the way, her past (and even her present) catch up with her and she becomes a ticking time bomb.
Super vague review, I know.
It’s best you go into this not knowing too much so you can just go along for the ride.
Please please please check trigger warnings first though because my goodness there are a lot!!💔😢
August 26, 2025
Sometimes you have to be selfish to save yourself!
Lawd my baby Sundae! This book had me stressed out at 2%. The most important role a parent has is to protect your children, and Vicky failed the Sundae and Nikki in the worst ways possible and when you damage your kids childhood. They take all that unhealed trauma into their adult lives. Sundae was the classic example of “hurt people hurt people.” She simply couldn’t catch a break & my heart ached for her! But when I say her resilience was unmatched!!! Many people would have folded & gave up on life in general with everything she endured. But she hung in there & I was so proud of her by the end of this book!
I joke sometimes about getting too emotionally invested in fictional characters. But this one hit different, because sadly there’s a lot of Sundaes in the world. Moral of the story is, this book was raw and deeply emotional, but I would highly recommend if you’re not easily triggered! Sundae is going to sit with me for a minute & I hope to see more of her!
Lawd my baby Sundae! This book had me stressed out at 2%. The most important role a parent has is to protect your children, and Vicky failed the Sundae and Nikki in the worst ways possible and when you damage your kids childhood. They take all that unhealed trauma into their adult lives. Sundae was the classic example of “hurt people hurt people.” She simply couldn’t catch a break & my heart ached for her! But when I say her resilience was unmatched!!! Many people would have folded & gave up on life in general with everything she endured. But she hung in there & I was so proud of her by the end of this book!
I joke sometimes about getting too emotionally invested in fictional characters. But this one hit different, because sadly there’s a lot of Sundaes in the world. Moral of the story is, this book was raw and deeply emotional, but I would highly recommend if you’re not easily triggered! Sundae is going to sit with me for a minute & I hope to see more of her!
September 6, 2025
Ehh MID. It wasn’t enough to feel the connection with the love interest or her “found family” and the main character was going through it at 19. I get it … it’s realistic but damn.
Read
June 1, 2025DNF
This was a lot and while the trigger warning was there I don’t feel like it even begins to capture the level of horror the reader has to experience traveling on the journey with Sundae. Too many descriptive Rape scenes featuring a minor. I’m sorry it was just way too much I don’t think I’m the most sensitive person but this one turned my stomach.
This was a lot and while the trigger warning was there I don’t feel like it even begins to capture the level of horror the reader has to experience traveling on the journey with Sundae. Too many descriptive Rape scenes featuring a minor. I’m sorry it was just way too much I don’t think I’m the most sensitive person but this one turned my stomach.
June 5, 2025
Rating 3.75 rounded up to 4
Please be sure to read the trigger warning before diving in. This is a raw coming-of-age story filled with get-it-how-you-live energy, heartbreak, and betrayal. Sundae’s journey is heartbreaking at times, and while the story had its heavy moments, I was genuinely happy to see her finally find some peace!
The mall scene with her & Deja 🤣
Please be sure to read the trigger warning before diving in. This is a raw coming-of-age story filled with get-it-how-you-live energy, heartbreak, and betrayal. Sundae’s journey is heartbreaking at times, and while the story had its heavy moments, I was genuinely happy to see her finally find some peace!
The mall scene with her & Deja 🤣
January 28, 2026
Page Turner
Selfish is that book! Go read the book! My soul cried for her. This was a very good read. I will be checking this author out.
Selfish is that book! Go read the book! My soul cried for her. This was a very good read. I will be checking this author out.
April 3, 2026
It’s something about books that feels like a deep therapy session… but not in the literal sense. This book was heavy, fresh out the gate. When you thought things were looking up, Shit hit the fan but in the most entertaining yet, heartbreaking way. This story was about a young girl surviving through the ugly cards she was delt and coming out of the battle shiny and renewed. Spoiler alert but not really - there is a happy ending in the end.
June 4, 2026
“No love lost.”
October 12, 2025
whew 😥
4.5✨Selfish was such a gut wrenching story. It was raw, heavy, and emotional. Sundae dealt with so many hardships, just trying to survive. She dealt with heartbreaks and relationships that were doomed from the start. Her “mother” failed her; at an early age Sundae was doing grown up things and that’s never okay. And being in a constant state of survival and not living is a feeling that resonates with me. My heart poured out for Sundae but thankfully Onyx was there affirming her throughout.
4.5✨Selfish was such a gut wrenching story. It was raw, heavy, and emotional. Sundae dealt with so many hardships, just trying to survive. She dealt with heartbreaks and relationships that were doomed from the start. Her “mother” failed her; at an early age Sundae was doing grown up things and that’s never okay. And being in a constant state of survival and not living is a feeling that resonates with me. My heart poured out for Sundae but thankfully Onyx was there affirming her throughout.
May 29, 2025
Kutura B did her thing! I’m sooo happy I read this book because we all know a Sundae or was a Sundae. When reading this book I felt every emotion and couldn’t put it down. Onyx is BAE! He was sooo gentle but with the ish too. I can’t wait to read more from Kutura 🥰
September 13, 2025
4.5 🌟
“I used to pour every piece of myself into people—even when it left me hollow.
I thought love meant breaking myself just to keep others whole.
I believed the pain was part of the promise... that if I bled enough, maybe they'd stay.
But now? I give on my terms.
I'm still selfish—but not in the way they warned me about.
Now, it's for the right reasons
Now, it's to save me.”
First of all, the cover of this book is absolutely gorgeous and I will be getting a physical copy just because of that tbh... But I did NOT expect to annotate sooooo much reading this, but so much of what Sundae was feeling, thinking and going through was so relatable to the younger me and I honestly wish my teenage self had read books like this growing up because so much unintentionally wisdom and guidance was given that I could've benefitted from when I was in my teens.
Also, I peeped the inspiration taken from the hood classic movie “Players Club” and I'm not mad at it; I feel the author did it justice! And I can also appreciate how well the ending was wrapped up with no storylines left unconcluded. Although, I wish a little more time was given to Sundae and Onyx's romance, I'm happy to see Sundae (and Nikki) finally got some sorta HEA... Hopefully that's not a spoiler!
All in all, this was exactly the fast-paced, messy, addictive, engaging read I needed to avoid a book slump and I will definitely be reading more from this author sooner than later! Her pen game is nice imo. 10 out of 10 recommend adding this one to your TBR if you're a lover of urban fiction / urban romance!!!
“I used to pour every piece of myself into people—even when it left me hollow.
I thought love meant breaking myself just to keep others whole.
I believed the pain was part of the promise... that if I bled enough, maybe they'd stay.
But now? I give on my terms.
I'm still selfish—but not in the way they warned me about.
Now, it's for the right reasons
Now, it's to save me.”
First of all, the cover of this book is absolutely gorgeous and I will be getting a physical copy just because of that tbh... But I did NOT expect to annotate sooooo much reading this, but so much of what Sundae was feeling, thinking and going through was so relatable to the younger me and I honestly wish my teenage self had read books like this growing up because so much unintentionally wisdom and guidance was given that I could've benefitted from when I was in my teens.
Also, I peeped the inspiration taken from the hood classic movie “Players Club” and I'm not mad at it; I feel the author did it justice! And I can also appreciate how well the ending was wrapped up with no storylines left unconcluded. Although, I wish a little more time was given to Sundae and Onyx's romance, I'm happy to see Sundae (and Nikki) finally got some sorta HEA... Hopefully that's not a spoiler!
All in all, this was exactly the fast-paced, messy, addictive, engaging read I needed to avoid a book slump and I will definitely be reading more from this author sooner than later! Her pen game is nice imo. 10 out of 10 recommend adding this one to your TBR if you're a lover of urban fiction / urban romance!!!
July 9, 2026
3.5⭐️
When I first saw this cover, I was immediately interested. I needed to know more about the girl on the cover.
I added it to my cart but kept pushing it down my TBR. Then out of nowhere, the price jumped from $25 to $108 overnight! I was like, “Well, I’m definitely not buying it now.” 😂 But luckily, Audible had it on sale, so I grabbed it. At that point, I had to read it because I figured it had to be that good.
This was my first book by Kutura B. While I enjoyed it, it didn’t quite live up to what I was hoping for. The story had lots of drama, trauma, and love, but I needed more than just the pain. I wanted to see more growth, and I needed a stronger connection and more chemistry between Sundae and Onyx.
The book definitely kept my attention, but some parts felt a little rushed. It was a good read, but I was left wanting more. The emotional and traumatic moments were there, but I felt like something was missing to really make the story work the way I wanted it to.
When I first saw this cover, I was immediately interested. I needed to know more about the girl on the cover.
I added it to my cart but kept pushing it down my TBR. Then out of nowhere, the price jumped from $25 to $108 overnight! I was like, “Well, I’m definitely not buying it now.” 😂 But luckily, Audible had it on sale, so I grabbed it. At that point, I had to read it because I figured it had to be that good.
This was my first book by Kutura B. While I enjoyed it, it didn’t quite live up to what I was hoping for. The story had lots of drama, trauma, and love, but I needed more than just the pain. I wanted to see more growth, and I needed a stronger connection and more chemistry between Sundae and Onyx.
The book definitely kept my attention, but some parts felt a little rushed. It was a good read, but I was left wanting more. The emotional and traumatic moments were there, but I felt like something was missing to really make the story work the way I wanted it to.
July 10, 2026
Wow this book truly took me through it. First I want to start by say check ur triggers because there are parts of this book this almost made me stop.
Sundae my girl truly never knew a minute of peace, and every time she thought she was finding it , the damn sky opened up and pour down on her hard. Everyone that should have had her back betrayed her and she still got up and was that bitch! I am so so proud of the woman she is at the end ! I also love that she didn’t take no shit from nobody!!! She was handing out tongue lashes and ass whipping like Jonny gone west lol and I love that for her…
Onxy !!! That sweet gently thug lol!!!! I the patience that man showed was amazing and I love that he didn’t quit.
Trey- bum ass loser and I’m glad he got that he got!
Peanut - another mark ass buster lol and he ain’t worth a damn.
Vicky- drag that hoe through the street, and I know she had something to do with daddy!!! I am convinced. That rat ass crackhead!
Best friend- you got exactly what you deserved and I hope one day you can look urself in The mirror and see you lost the realest bitch you will ever know.
Nicky- I’m proud of you boo cause I was sure u was finna truly follow behind Vicky.
Sundae my girl truly never knew a minute of peace, and every time she thought she was finding it , the damn sky opened up and pour down on her hard. Everyone that should have had her back betrayed her and she still got up and was that bitch! I am so so proud of the woman she is at the end ! I also love that she didn’t take no shit from nobody!!! She was handing out tongue lashes and ass whipping like Jonny gone west lol and I love that for her…
Onxy !!! That sweet gently thug lol!!!! I the patience that man showed was amazing and I love that he didn’t quit.
Trey- bum ass loser and I’m glad he got that he got!
Peanut - another mark ass buster lol and he ain’t worth a damn.
Vicky- drag that hoe through the street, and I know she had something to do with daddy!!! I am convinced. That rat ass crackhead!
Best friend- you got exactly what you deserved and I hope one day you can look urself in The mirror and see you lost the realest bitch you will ever know.
Nicky- I’m proud of you boo cause I was sure u was finna truly follow behind Vicky.
June 12, 2026
💔
This was an interesting read, and the audio was well done, but I'm conflicted about my feelings because, on the one hand, Sundae lived such a terrible life; I mean, I felt so bad for baby girl. But on the other hand, she gave way too many chances to people who truly didn't deserve it like her sister and Trae. So many events could have been avoided if she used her brain. I was so glad when Onyx came into the story and allowed her to breathe a bit. The energy he brought into her life was truly what she needed. The ending was just beautiful, but the road to her happy ending was rough. So glad she learned to be selfish.
This was an interesting read, and the audio was well done, but I'm conflicted about my feelings because, on the one hand, Sundae lived such a terrible life; I mean, I felt so bad for baby girl. But on the other hand, she gave way too many chances to people who truly didn't deserve it like her sister and Trae. So many events could have been avoided if she used her brain. I was so glad when Onyx came into the story and allowed her to breathe a bit. The energy he brought into her life was truly what she needed. The ending was just beautiful, but the road to her happy ending was rough. So glad she learned to be selfish.
November 4, 2025
I felt immense sympathy for Sundae; no one should have to endure the life she was given. Moments in the book were so immersive I felt like I was right there at the Pynk in P-Valley! Other parts, however, made me want to throw the book across the room. It provided a harsh perspective on how your environment and the people in it can crush you. The only way to break free, it showed, is to prioritize yourself and be "selfish."
September 13, 2025
4.5⭐️. I knew it would be Onyx. He was so patient and kind. He waited for the right time. Sundae the horrible childhood. Vicki was pure evil. The things she said were just horrible unforgivable strung out or not.
Sundae never gave up she made some wrong decisions but she still held on to her dreams. In the end she ended up with a small circle but it was a circle she could trust.
Sundae never gave up she made some wrong decisions but she still held on to her dreams. In the end she ended up with a small circle but it was a circle she could trust.
July 7, 2026
I went in blind w/o reading the trigger warnings and that was a mistake, but it was still a wonderful read. Saying that to say -- read the trigger warnings FIRST and do yourself a favor and read this if you havent.
This was a gritty coming of age story. Nothing about this book was easy like Sundae morning. Happy to know she got her HAE in the end, and her sister was safe and sound with her.
& it's forever fuck Trae & Deja.
This was a gritty coming of age story. Nothing about this book was easy like Sundae morning. Happy to know she got her HAE in the end, and her sister was safe and sound with her.
& it's forever fuck Trae & Deja.
July 11, 2026
I don’t know what took me so long to read this book, but I loved every moment. Sundae went through hell, but she still wasn’t broken. She tried to be everything to everyone but left no room for herself. I’m so glad she chose to be SELFISH.
June 20, 2025
Sundae
This book was so good! First read from the author and it was a great read! The end had me tearing up!! Cheers to the girls who made it out!
This book was so good! First read from the author and it was a great read! The end had me tearing up!! Cheers to the girls who made it out!
June 22, 2026
This was good. I’m glad my girl was SELFISH at the end. Well deserved. Very heavy read overall.
September 16, 2025
This book is def an emotion roller coasters and teaches you a lot about trust. I can say though that EVERY character got on my nerves at a point even the FMC but I cut her slack due to every that that happened to her. Onyx the man of the hour is so sweet and patient and that’s what sundae needed especially with the chaos that was going on. PLEASE check your triggers if you do end up reading this.
July 15, 2026
Excellent!!!
I really enjoy this reading to the point it feels like a movie. Sundae has been through a lot to get to where she is at. I am so happy with the ending of this book this author just did an amazing job. I am looking forward to reading her other books.
I really enjoy this reading to the point it feels like a movie. Sundae has been through a lot to get to where she is at. I am so happy with the ending of this book this author just did an amazing job. I am looking forward to reading her other books.
July 1, 2025
⭐️⭐️⭐️.25
November 11, 2025
4/5
- This was a heavy read and I felt for Sundae throughout this whole story. Sundae was just trying to survive with the cards she was dealt.
- I experienced different emotions while reading — anger, empathy, and even happiness during some portions. Read the trigger warning before jumping into this raw coming-of-age story.
- This was a heavy read and I felt for Sundae throughout this whole story. Sundae was just trying to survive with the cards she was dealt.
- I experienced different emotions while reading — anger, empathy, and even happiness during some portions. Read the trigger warning before jumping into this raw coming-of-age story.
September 7, 2025
Healing!!
I loved this book so much! I wanted to whoop sundae and hug her at the same time. No child should experience the things she did. Trauma, bad relationships, bad friendships & personal growth is what it gave! Deja was a typical snake friend who was the type of friend of convenience only! With a friend like Deja, who needs enemies! Onyx, Onyx!! You did that! He was exactly what Sundae needed. He loved her without judgement. Cracked them walls right on down, and cracked sis back to! I’m just so happy things worked out the way they did. I was scared for a moment the way Trae had my sis moving! 10/10 read for me! Great read
I loved this book so much! I wanted to whoop sundae and hug her at the same time. No child should experience the things she did. Trauma, bad relationships, bad friendships & personal growth is what it gave! Deja was a typical snake friend who was the type of friend of convenience only! With a friend like Deja, who needs enemies! Onyx, Onyx!! You did that! He was exactly what Sundae needed. He loved her without judgement. Cracked them walls right on down, and cracked sis back to! I’m just so happy things worked out the way they did. I was scared for a moment the way Trae had my sis moving! 10/10 read for me! Great read
November 9, 2025
4.5⭐️
I ate this book up!! This is a story that’ll stick with me because it was such an intense roller coaster. I was so happy that Sundae was able to have her peace because sis couldn’t catch a break!!
The story was paced well & I really enjoyed the writing bc the language was one I could relate to. I did feel like we could’ve had more of Onyx.. I didn’t get to know too much about him & I wasn’t a fan how he’d always pop up at the “right” moments. Other than that, I really enjoyed this book. Would def recommend!
I ate this book up!! This is a story that’ll stick with me because it was such an intense roller coaster. I was so happy that Sundae was able to have her peace because sis couldn’t catch a break!!
The story was paced well & I really enjoyed the writing bc the language was one I could relate to. I did feel like we could’ve had more of Onyx.. I didn’t get to know too much about him & I wasn’t a fan how he’d always pop up at the “right” moments. Other than that, I really enjoyed this book. Would def recommend!
January 21, 2026
4.5 ✨
This is a book that will stay with me…literally. It had me invested from the first page. While Sundae is a fictional character, her story is so relatable and just hit me in a different way, a heartbreaking but inspiring way, as we watched Sundae overcome and preserve through things no child, no woman, should have to endure. I highly recommend this book but read with caution and check the trigger warnings, because this book you touches on some heavy things that bring on some intense emotions. I look forward to reading more from this author.
This is a book that will stay with me…literally. It had me invested from the first page. While Sundae is a fictional character, her story is so relatable and just hit me in a different way, a heartbreaking but inspiring way, as we watched Sundae overcome and preserve through things no child, no woman, should have to endure. I highly recommend this book but read with caution and check the trigger warnings, because this book you touches on some heavy things that bring on some intense emotions. I look forward to reading more from this author.
February 3, 2026
Whew. This book was definitely a lot to unpack. The author did an amazing job with this storyline. Please read and take heed to the triggers. Sundae experienced a whole LOT. I love how throughout the book it is was a lot of emphasis on doing for OTHERS rather that be relationships, friendships, sibling relationships, and the importance on being “selfish” to get you back on track. It was a great journal entry at the end of the book that brought everything together and also makes a realize that we can apply this to ourselves and not just the characters in the story.
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