Track of Tears: Derailing Estrangement

by Cindy Lu

Dumbfounded by all the narratives painting you as a horrible parent — sick of crying over the unanswered “what and why” — or enduring the stone-cold silence while being the emotional piñata in their never-ending healing journey… one that somehow requires erasing you from existence?

Welcome to the circus of modern estrangement — where you raised them, but the All-You-Can-Eat Buffet of Self-Interest is fueled by our culture’s obsession with digital validation. TikTok Therapists want parents to grovel; social media labels you toxic and expendable — and you? You’re just standing there wondering how “I did my best” became a federal offense and rallying cries for family excommunication.

Family estrangement is the fastest-growing trend — a weapon, a status symbol of self-importance for younger generations, with parents and grandchildren left as collateral damage. Feelings aren’t facts. Respecting boundaries doesn’t mean building walls to isolate.

This isn’t a self-help book full of sugarcoated clichés — it’s a no-BS, raw, unapologetic survival guide from a real parent who’s been through the fire and climbed out of the ashes. Estrangement doesn’t have to be a one-way road paved with manipulation, power trips, and delusional dialogue. You’re allowed to be hurt and hold your head high. There is a way out of Parental Purgatory — so let the journey toward healing and peace begin.

429 pages, Kindle Edition

Published June 21, 2025

Reviews

[Rebecca Moucha · Rating 5 out of 5]

It has been eye-opening for me this book. so many things that were written about it was Saturday times and it was funny you can just hear the heartache in her words I know how she feels cuz it's happened to me and try to understand that you she made sense I would suggest this book to everyone whose child has decided they aren't that important in their life anymore there's no contact of today's youth is destroying family ring true what I think every parent that goes to parental alienation.I have suggested this book to every person going to the same everyday life that other people are going through it's helpful make you understand yourself and where you didn't think it's possible so give this book a chance it's great if I had been enough money I would buy them and send them out to people I know who are hurting

[Traci Drake · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Grace of a Woman, not the grief of a Child," CindyLu
None of us escapes the hurts and scars of childhood. Pain is what levels the field for all humans. This powerful story is about steering into the pain head on, finding the message hidden in one's broken heart, and the courage to choose life.
The frank manner in which CindyLu tells her story is refreshing. She owns her mistakes; she finds forgiveness for her adult children, and walks free from the torment of believing she deserved the abuse heaped upon her.
Inspiring. Gritty. Witty. Funny. Sad. Hopeful.
This is a story that helped me, and I hope you find the same for you.
I highly recommend it.

[Robin Dix · Rating 5 out of 5]

Although this book was well written, it turned out to be a book that wasn’t quite my cup of tea

[Anne Hendricks · Rating 5 out of 5]

First: thank you, Cindy, for writing the best book I've read on this subject... ever!

In an era defined by a rising tide of familial severance, Cindy Lu’s Track of Tears stands out as an essential, foundational text. The author tackles the difficult, often stigmatized subject of the "No Contact" epidemic—the painful phenomenon where adult children cut off ties, leaving parents reeling in confusion and grief. If you are seeking clarity on this complex issue, this book is, unequivocally, the most comprehensive and heartfelt account you will find written from the parental perspective.

Lu achieves a masterful balance by structuring the book as both a deeply vulnerable memoir and a practical guide for recovery. The first half invites readers into her own courageous and heart-wrenching journey, allowing those who feel isolated by estrangement to recognize their own pain and confusion mirrored in her story. This raw honesty is what gives the book its genuine authority and warmth.

Crucially, the book refuses to linger only in the realm of grief. The second, equally vital component offers insightful recommendations and a true roadmap for healing. Lu shifts the focus from the impossible task of controlling the estranged relationship to the empowering work of self-acceptance and forward movement. She provides compassionate advice on how to process the blame, navigate the societal stigma, and ultimately, reclaim one’s life and identity after such a profound loss.

Track of Tears is not just a book; it is a lifeline. It validates the immense sorrow of losing a relationship with an adult child while providing the tools to transform that grief into resilience. This is a must-read for anyone who has been impacted by modern familial estrangement and is ready to move beyond heartbreak toward hope and meaningful peace.

[Sarah Brooks · Rating 2 out of 5]

I started this book so hopeful that it would offer some new insight or new perspectives about estrangement, ( I am 9 years in)
What I got was a woman saying the same things over me over.
1. Her life has been hard, but she is not dwelling on it, although she does feel the need to mention it dozens of times
2. Her sister is her saviour, although she isn’t able to share her struggles since it causes too much disruption in her sister life
3. She no longer cares what her estranged children are doing, although she clearly cares what her EC are doing.
All of these things are fine and are her journey which sounds like it ha been full of challenges, but I couldn’t finish the book because it felt like it was these 3 messages repeated for 300 pages.
I commend the author for working through her pain and struggles, for trying like the rest of us to make peace with our EC choices and for writing the book at all. Great job!
But as a parent of EC I didn’t find this book to offer much for my healing or understanding. I hope it’s a better fit for others

[Becky · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5 stars. Hands down, the best book on estrangement I have read. The author holds nothing back as she writes about the epidemic that is parental estrangement. She takes blame where blame is warranted, and she calls out the millennial and GenZ generations for the real reason for estrangement: lack of communication skills and selfishness by what she refers to as The Cancel Culture. She weaves her heartbreaking story throughout the book using a train and its stops to explain what stages one must go through as they walk that very painful road. The book almost reads like a novel which makes it engaging.

[Jen Gallagher · Rating 5 out of 5]

After experiencing the last heave-ho from her children, Cindy Lu was left with two choices, either wallow in pity and spiral into nothingness or pull herself up by her own two bootstraps and heal. This is an engaging read of trials and heartaches, woven together with grief counseling coping mechanisms throughout. It makes you stop the blame game, shift focus to self strength and move forward. If you have experienced the shut out from children of this cancel-culture generation, this is a must read.

[Rhonda · Rating 4 out of 5]

Language Alert...this would have been a five star read if not for the language. There is so much truth in this book about the reality of estrangement from your adult children. It's a very balanced look at estrangement from both sides.

[Stephanie Baldridge · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book!!! Is amazing! It's real, it's raw, it shows the pain one endures when children think they are better than a parent. It hits all the feelers! Yet what i love most is how she pushes through, learns to dedeain her own way, alone. She is an amazing woman and a great testament to surviving how children have become. Some will literally change a counselor if they tell them that a parent isn't the issue.
How do you fight that? Like CundyLu! Unless you have walked in those shoes, it will be difficult to understand.
Thank you for an amazing track of survival!

[Leora LaClair · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is about the Author's courageous journey of estrangement in her own voice, a true testament to her strength...it made me laugh with its witty verbiage and a vibrant personality, provoked thought, evoked shock, sadness, but overall, it showcased the Author's unwavering resilience and showcases the epidemic of Estrangement. She sets and example for us Estranged Parents to follow...a must read! 100 stars! Furthermore, Estranged Children tend to follow groups regarding estrangement and leave poor book reviews etc to taunt us for standing up to this cult like brainwashing, please beware!