When Good Moms Feel Bad: An Empowering Guide for Transforming Guilt, Anxiety, and Anger into Compassion, Confidence, and Connectedness

by Jessica Tomich Sorci LMFT PMH-C, Rebecca Geshuri

From two maternal mental health   a first-of-its-kind guide to help moms untangle complicated feelings like anger, guilt, shame, and failure, offering empathy, support, and practical strategies.
 
Moms have it hard; whether due to ingrained beliefs, the pressures of everything from social expectations to social media, or our own childhood wounds, even the best moms can feel like they are failing. With empathy, compassion, and deep wisdom, maternal health experts Jessica Tomich Sorci and Rebecca Geshuri address difficult and often suppressed feelings such as anxiety, anger, shame and guilt, as well as disappointment, ambivalence about being a mom, and yearning for your “old” life.

Tomich Sorci and Geshuri help any mom anywhere to identify these pain points, make sense of her distress, and begin to find relief. Their revelatory approach validates the unique suffering moms experience and offers reinterpretations that bring hope and empowerment. Filled with exercises, strategies, and step-by-step guidance, When Good Moms Feel Bad shows you empowering ways to access your abundant inner resources begin building self-trust. You’re already a good mom. Start discovering how your harshest internal voices are trying to help you—and befriend the parts of yourself that you’ve been fighting.

Genres: Self Help

251 pages, Kindle Edition

Expected publication February 3, 2026

Reviews

[Karen · Rating 3 out of 5]

WHEN GOOD MOMS FEEL BAD
BY: JESSICA TOMICH SORCI

I have an extensive background in all modalities of psychology and it's rare that I would rate a book as low as this one, in fact I think this is the first time U have ever been so sure that I felt this to be one that I wouldn't recommend. I am not a Clinician but while I love the concept of this book's intent, I also couldn't relate personally to the negative emotions and I speak from experience of having raised two children into young adults. I think that I have a multitude of reasons why I can applaud the two author's intent because I am fully on board with empowering mothers who have felt or who struggle with these valid emotions, I don't think the average mother with young children who are already overwhelmed are going to find relief in this book.

I could write so many different ideas but I will start with my opinion first is that most women with young children who are looking forward to finding relief are not going to find the modality of Internal Family Systems or IFS, pioneered by Dr. Richard Schwartz is easy to understand in this volume. I am an older reader but I think that unless they have been educated in IFS, or are beyond the average fleeting negative emotions that are a common part of the human experience I think that the execution of this will be confusing. I have nothing but positive opinions about this modality bringing rapid results in terms of IFS being effective, I don't think your average audience will find this user friendly. I am trying to remember back when I had my first child. and most of my acquaintances would meet once a week for lunch with our children that were under a year old wouldn't relate to this unless they had a chronic unexpected diagnosis, and I;m thinking that one of us did but she felt upset and found connection from us, her family etc.

I think unless a young caregiver needed additional support then this could be a resource in conjunction with seeking out a therapist who uses IFS, and that I don't think it's impossible to use this without an IFS practitioner. I just think that I of all people think that I might be the wrong fit as far as I had many adverse experiences which I can imagine should have made me experience motherhood relating to these symptoms, but personally I should say that I either had the opposite experience. I loved being a mother and I never felt anger, guilt, if anything I should say that I think I felt that I chose to have more children even though I almost died giving birth to my eldest child. I didn't get to hold my first child since I was dying in the ICU all day, and then sent by ambulance where I spent another week in one of the best hospitals in the U.S. which my baby couldn't come with me, depriving me to see him. When I saw him when my husband, and best friend drove an hour and a half with our baby I remember as weak as I was when I saw him how I felt an instant overpowering, love that I can't find adequate words to describe.

I have two Graduate degrees that I earned prior which I never used but I have no regrets since I was fortunate to have the choice to be a stay at home Mom. Even though my obstetrician told me not to have anymore children. I wanted another baby when he turned one year old. I had a horrible role model that if not for my father, and two sets of Grandparents who were saints who I made a conscious decision to use as my role models. I had more children and I can't explain it but I never had to raise my voice to my children because I had never felt their behavior warranted it. The only reason I decided to read this book is because after they moved out I had a couple of minor disagreements with my eldest, and one with my youngest. I was fortunate that my children and I had laid back temperaments. My husband was stricter, and he is easy going but we both often wish we could relive their younger years again.

This book would be recommended for therapists or those familiar with IFS, since I thought it could have been written in a way that explained it for a general audience. I think I read biochemistry books that are written in easy to understand for everybody. I feel bad but I read most self help books who I prefer the authors to have if not a PhD, or MD that are written to be engaging, and I think that I have been doing this long enough to tell the difference between much harder and sophisticated concepts and I know that this was the first time I have rated below four stars. I felt disappointed because I am well versed in IFS, and even I found it confusing in certain areas. I think even my primary care doctor who I wanted a second opinion from who I saw yesterday who is younger agreed that only IFS therapists are going to read it. I had to read it since I had to give it an honest and fair opinion, and I am pro mental health for those who need it I consider it a strength for those who seek it. I think personal growth is something we all should invest in. I think this was written with compassion and with the intent to be a source of comfort for those struggling. I wish the authors my very best wishes for success. I think in the synopsis this requires in bold text meant for Clinicians or those who are educated in the modality of Internal Family Systems. I cannot recommend this, but I hope the fact that I wrote a thoughtful review which I spent a lot more time on considering I was disappointed in this and the fact that I read it from start to finish.

Publication Date: February 3. 2026

Thank you to Net Galley, Jessica Tomich Sorci, and Grand Central Publishing--Balance for generously providing me with my ARC, in exchange for a fair and honest review. All opinions are my own, as always.

#WhenGoodMomsFeelBad #JessicaTomichSorci #GrandCentralPublishing #Balance #NetGalley #NetGalley

[Chelsea Jean · Rating 5 out of 5]

When Good Moms Feel Bad, by Jessica Tomich Sorci and Rebecca Geshuri, is a compassionate and hopeful book that names the coexisting realities of motherhood as exquisitely beautiful and shockingly hard, and invites us mommas to learn to care for ourselves and our own inner worlds just as we try to love our external children.

The authors have adapted principles from Internal Family Systems (IFS) to meet the unique developmental needs of matrescence—the ongoing journey of becoming mothers, in which our own tender wanting and fears and sadness (which the authors refer to as our “Inner Baby”) come alive in new ways right alongside our external children.

The authors liken the IFS concept of “Self” in IFS to an “Inner Mom” of sorts—that central part of us that is caring, compassionate, connected, courageous, calm, curious, and creative, and that has clarity and choice. The authors also adapt the IFS concept of protective “parts” to “mom parts”—parts that work so hard to keep moms and their children safe (and do!), but that are actually also inner children who are themselves in need of mothering.

Throughout the book, the authors suggest that just as we mother our own (external) vulnerable children, we as mommas can also learn to mother ourselves and our own inner world. From this framework, it is learning to mother ourselves that actually frees up more space to love our children from a place of calm, compassion, and connection—instead of disconnection and reactivity—even when the external world remains challenging.

This book has a TON of information, and is roughly organized as follows: (1) The state of intensive mothering (particularly in the west); moms are under an incredible amount of pressure and it feels hard to mother because it is. (2) The concepts of: parts and their protective function; the inner mom; and the good mom bad mom loop (polarization) moms often find themselves in and criticize themselves for. (3) Hope for healing: unblending; truths; grief and shame as the inescapable vulnerabilities of being human; remedies of Inner Mom qualities; & practical applications (which was one of my favorite sections of the book).

I am so grateful to the authors for creating this deeply caring book, and hope it helps so many moms feel seen, validated, and cared for. I read the digital arc for this review, but look forward to getting to hold a physical copy someday when this book is published, as I imagine that it will be helpful to be able to flip through to different sections depending on what feels most relevant at a given moment. I also look forward to being able to flip through to the journals prompts included throughout—these provide so many valuable trailheads for deeper reflection. I think these will be helpful in my own personal life as a momma as well as in my professional life as a therapist.

I will say that while someone doesn’t need to be familiar with IFS in order to read this book, I wonder if some of the information may feel difficult to fully understand if the idea of “parts” is brand new. I am reading this book as a momma but also a therapist who is trained in IFS, which I am guessing allowed me to more easily track with the ideas in this book. As IFS is a very experiential and relational model, I also imagine that much of what is talked about in this book will make sense to moms on a deeper level if they are able to go to therapy themselves to explore these ideas more fully. I REALLY hope that so many therapists read this book, so that the mommas who are willing & able to go to therapy find compassionate and supportive spaces that welcome them and all of their “mom parts”. I also really hope that someday there is a workbook to accompany this book, as I think this could be invaluable and slightly less information heavy for the mommas in the trenches of motherhood that might not have time to read an entire book.

I know this is a book I’ll keep coming back to and will continue to be impacted by each time in new ways, and I hope the same is true for so many other moms and therapists. I’m so grateful to Jessica Tomich Sorci and Rebecca Geshuri for this beautiful, caring expansion of IFS for moms, and to NetGalley and to Balance for this digital arc.

Publication Date: February 3rd, 2026!

[Brigid · Rating 3 out of 5]

3 stars
I had a difficult time grasping and remembering the terminology of this approach. There was so much lingo that reading was often confusing and I felt like I was trying to decode the text. Passages often wandered from topic without much clear direction.
I appreciated the prompts this book provides in reflection. There were nuggets of wisdom that resonated with me and things I will chew over.
I don't think this is a book I would buy myself but one I would certainly loan this from the library and flip through it, if that makes sense.


This ARC was provided by the publisher via Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.

[Amy · Rating 2 out of 5]

The introduction of this book was easily the best part. I felt so heard—so validated. Finally someone understands the dialectical parts of motherhood where you both love it and struggle at the same time. It started to get too wordy with too much IFS lingo. I’m familiar either way IFS and like the idea of it, but it seemed a bit too in depth and lost me part of the way through.

Thank you NetGalley for giving me an ARC opportunity.

[Christine Sanchez · Rating 4 out of 5]

An important book for everyone—not just moms going through a hard season. It beautifully illustrates that no two motherhood journeys are the same, offering compassion and understanding for the wide range of emotions mothers experience. The book gently reminds readers that every feeling is valid, whether joyful, overwhelming, or somewhere in between, and encourages a more honest and empathetic conversation around motherhood.