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Sugar Pill Duet #1
Sucker Love
Heartbroken art student Noel Underwood isn’t looking for anything serious when he hits the local kink club looking for a distraction. But a reckless encounter with Luca Karvelas—an older tattoo artist with nowhere else to go—quickly turns into an arrangement neither of them can walk away from.
Fresh off a separation from his wife, Luca has spent his life burying parts of himself he never wanted to face. Getting involved with a man nearly a decade younger is a bad idea; moving in together is even worse. But the fierce, prickly boy he’s made his roommate makes him feel comfortable in his own skin for the first time in years.
Noel has demons of his own. Beneath the sharp edges and a wildly self-destructive streak is a desperate and vulnerable need to be loved. With Luca, he feels whole in a way he never has before, and together, their chemistry is impossible to ignore.
But when the past comes crashing back into their lives and old patterns resurface, Luca is forced to make a choice—one that could cost him the only person who’s ever really seen him.
SUCKER LOVE is a soft D/s, hurt/comfort MM romance centering BPD representation and brimming with angst, drama, and messy desire.
IMPORTANT: This is Book 1 in the Sugar Pill Duet. Noel and Luca's story concludes in Book 2, SWALLOW. Please see the Author's Note for content guidance.
370 pages, Kindle Edition
Published July 28, 2025
About the author
Risa Cruise
5 books84 followersRisa Cruise (she/they) writes queer romance that centers messy, tender and deeply human narratives. Originally from Massachusetts, they mysteriously wound up in Australia, where they currently reside with their partner and two rescue cats. Neurodivergence fuels both their chaos and their creativity, and they have a soft spot for exceptionally flawed characters with big feelings.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 131 reviews
April 28, 2026
Edit 5/10/25
After finishing Swallow I needed to come back here and say, all this pain was worth it!
________________________________________________________________________
This is kismet, fate, whatever you want to call it—not that I believe in that sort of thing. But two guys on the rebound, both in need of resolving their living situations, walk into a bar. . .
The Vibes:
-Debut novel / Beautiful writing
-Duet – ends with painful cliffhanger
-Age gap
-Soft Dom/sub
-Almost-hookups to roommates-with-benefits to more
-Hurt/comfort
-BPD rep
-Amelia the dog, who is basically a lazy cat in disguise
I’m very confused about how to rate this book, especially after that ending. I struggled, I raged, I pulled my hair… but I also liked it?! I honestly don’t know how to feel, so I’ll leave this unrated until Book 2.
✨ What Worked:
Noel is drowning in self-doubt — he feels "impossible to love," especially after being left by his ex and hitting a financial wall. Enter Luca, a tattoo artist mid-divorce, older and awkward but somehow perfect for Noel. Their connection blooms into something unexpected, raw, and rooted in a soft Dom/sub dynamic that feels electric.
Some people don’t just like to be told what to do — they need it. Noel is that person. And Luca, after hiding his true self in a straight marriage for 7 years, is discovering just how badly he wants to take control and care for Noel. The result is a dynamic that is filthy, intense, and brimming with that possessive "mine, yours" energy.
Yes, it’s fast. But emotionally, it still works. They see each other — baggage and all — and that’s rare.
And one extremely positive side note: Noel is descrived as looking like Brian Molko from Placebo — and Luca even calls him his Stunt Girl (!!!). As a lifelong Placebo fan, that gave this book extra points just for existing in the same vibe. Obsessed. ****
💥 Major Rage Triggers:
Let’s talk about Luca.
He’s older. Supposedly wiser. But he is a coward. He hides behind a loveless marriage for 7 years because he’s afraid of his bigoted father, then — AFTER his wife initiates divorce — asks her to pretend they’re still together for three more months. For what? So he doesn’t have to tell his daddy? Sir, I will buy you a backbone off Temu.
And the way he treats Noel... it’s gutting. Here’s just a taste:
“You know this is important to me, right?” he says. “Reconnecting with people like him, old friends.”
“Did you know he was going to be here?”
“No, and that’s not the point... you’re going to throw a fit about it and run off because, what, you weren’t the center of attention for five minutes?”
“That’s not fair.”
“Then grow up, Noel. You cannot act like this around my friends. It’s embarrassing.”
Excuse me????
Later, this absolute peach of a man says:
“You are being delusional, Noel.”
And poor Noel reacts like he’s been slapped — because emotionally, he has. And Luca? He immediately tries to backpedal:
“No, Noel, I’m sorry. I’m fucking sorry. I didn’t mean that.”
But it’s too late. Because those words land like knives.
And Luca… never really apologizes. He brushes things off. Demands understanding. Even weaponizes his own trauma to excuse his selfishness.
He tells Noel he loves him — and then turns around and treats him like a tantrum-throwing child. Luca’s emotional inconsistency is honestly painful to read.
🧠 The Big Conflict:
Noel may be unstable, but at least he’s consistent. He shows up with all his flaws, with no mask.
Luca? He’s the walking contradiction. Sweet and soft one moment, cruel and callous the next. He says things like:
“You’re embarrassing.”
“You’re delusional.”
“Grow up.”
To someone with deep abandonment trauma. Who literally feels like a burden all the time. It’s cruel. And even worse — he acts like Noel is the problem.
🤬 That Ending Though
When I saw where it was going, I felt sick. And then the actual solution Luca proposed? I couldn’t believe it. It’s selfish. It’s cruel. And the worst part?
Noel would still say yes if Luca came back.
Because he loves him. Because he always says yes. Because people like Noel think love means accepting crumbs.
😵 Final Thoughts:
Do I hate Luca? Or do I love him?
Maybe both.
At his core, I think he does want to be better. But right now, he’s not. He hurts Noel repeatedly — and while some of it might come from fear or trauma, that doesn’t make it okay.
He is a walking emotional whiplash.
I love him. I hate him.
And that’s why I need Book 2.
I need — no, I DEMAND — groveling. Crawling. Luca licking the floor Noel walks on. Or else.
❣️Book Safety & Content
-Cheating:No
-OM/OW Drama:No (there's mention of Luca’s ex wife, and two exes in the past. One of them appears and is all drunk over Luca but he pushes him away)
-Third-Act Breakup:Yes
-Role Dynamics: strict roles
-POV: 1st person (dual)
-Format: Duet (ends WTF cliffhanger)
-Angst Level: Medium, but frustration levels are stupidly high!
-Spice Level: Medium high
After finishing Swallow I needed to come back here and say, all this pain was worth it!
________________________________________________________________________
This is kismet, fate, whatever you want to call it—not that I believe in that sort of thing. But two guys on the rebound, both in need of resolving their living situations, walk into a bar. . .
The Vibes:
-Debut novel / Beautiful writing
-Duet – ends with painful cliffhanger
-Age gap
-Soft Dom/sub
-Almost-hookups to roommates-with-benefits to more
-Hurt/comfort
-BPD rep
-Amelia the dog, who is basically a lazy cat in disguise
I’m very confused about how to rate this book, especially after that ending. I struggled, I raged, I pulled my hair… but I also liked it?! I honestly don’t know how to feel, so I’ll leave this unrated until Book 2.
✨ What Worked:
Noel is drowning in self-doubt — he feels "impossible to love," especially after being left by his ex and hitting a financial wall. Enter Luca, a tattoo artist mid-divorce, older and awkward but somehow perfect for Noel. Their connection blooms into something unexpected, raw, and rooted in a soft Dom/sub dynamic that feels electric.
Some people don’t just like to be told what to do — they need it. Noel is that person. And Luca, after hiding his true self in a straight marriage for 7 years, is discovering just how badly he wants to take control and care for Noel. The result is a dynamic that is filthy, intense, and brimming with that possessive "mine, yours" energy.
Yes, it’s fast. But emotionally, it still works. They see each other — baggage and all — and that’s rare.
And one extremely positive side note: Noel is descrived as looking like Brian Molko from Placebo — and Luca even calls him his Stunt Girl (!!!). As a lifelong Placebo fan, that gave this book extra points just for existing in the same vibe. Obsessed. ****
💥 Major Rage Triggers:
Let’s talk about Luca.
He’s older. Supposedly wiser. But he is a coward. He hides behind a loveless marriage for 7 years because he’s afraid of his bigoted father, then — AFTER his wife initiates divorce — asks her to pretend they’re still together for three more months. For what? So he doesn’t have to tell his daddy? Sir, I will buy you a backbone off Temu.
And the way he treats Noel... it’s gutting. Here’s just a taste:
“You know this is important to me, right?” he says. “Reconnecting with people like him, old friends.”
“Did you know he was going to be here?”
“No, and that’s not the point... you’re going to throw a fit about it and run off because, what, you weren’t the center of attention for five minutes?”
“That’s not fair.”
“Then grow up, Noel. You cannot act like this around my friends. It’s embarrassing.”
Excuse me????
Later, this absolute peach of a man says:
“You are being delusional, Noel.”
And poor Noel reacts like he’s been slapped — because emotionally, he has. And Luca? He immediately tries to backpedal:
“No, Noel, I’m sorry. I’m fucking sorry. I didn’t mean that.”
But it’s too late. Because those words land like knives.
And Luca… never really apologizes. He brushes things off. Demands understanding. Even weaponizes his own trauma to excuse his selfishness.
He tells Noel he loves him — and then turns around and treats him like a tantrum-throwing child. Luca’s emotional inconsistency is honestly painful to read.
🧠 The Big Conflict:
Noel may be unstable, but at least he’s consistent. He shows up with all his flaws, with no mask.
Luca? He’s the walking contradiction. Sweet and soft one moment, cruel and callous the next. He says things like:
“You’re embarrassing.”
“You’re delusional.”
“Grow up.”
To someone with deep abandonment trauma. Who literally feels like a burden all the time. It’s cruel. And even worse — he acts like Noel is the problem.
🤬 That Ending Though
When I saw where it was going, I felt sick. And then the actual solution Luca proposed? I couldn’t believe it. It’s selfish. It’s cruel. And the worst part?
Noel would still say yes if Luca came back.
Because he loves him. Because he always says yes. Because people like Noel think love means accepting crumbs.
😵 Final Thoughts:
Do I hate Luca? Or do I love him?
Maybe both.
At his core, I think he does want to be better. But right now, he’s not. He hurts Noel repeatedly — and while some of it might come from fear or trauma, that doesn’t make it okay.
He is a walking emotional whiplash.
I love him. I hate him.
And that’s why I need Book 2.
I need — no, I DEMAND — groveling. Crawling. Luca licking the floor Noel walks on. Or else.
❣️Book Safety & Content
-Cheating:No
-OM/OW Drama:No (there's mention of Luca’s ex wife, and two exes in the past. One of them appears and is all drunk over Luca but he pushes him away)
-Third-Act Breakup:Yes
-Role Dynamics: strict roles
-POV: 1st person (dual)
-Format: Duet (ends WTF cliffhanger)
-Angst Level: Medium, but frustration levels are stupidly high!
-Spice Level: Medium high
April 24, 2026
5 ⭐️
spice: 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️/5
format: ebook
WHAT THE FUCK.
I LITERALLY CANNOT BREATHE FROM CRYING AND I FEEL LIKE I’M GONNA THROW UP.
WHAT THE FUCKKKKK?!
spice: 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️/5
format: ebook
WHAT THE FUCK.
I LITERALLY CANNOT BREATHE FROM CRYING AND I FEEL LIKE I’M GONNA THROW UP.
WHAT THE FUCKKKKK?!
April 27, 2026
Complex, raw, REAL! Sweet and sexy. Beautiful writing. Every line is felt. Fully realized characters with distinct voice and perspective. I love their personalities so much. They are flawed and so deeply human. Good, bad and downright wicked at times. This hurt so good! My heart aches! Fantastic stuff here. 💜
”I hate you,” I whisper.
”That’s okay,” he whispers back. “I love you anyway.”
”I hate you,” I whisper.
”That’s okay,” he whispers back. “I love you anyway.”
November 20, 2025
Holy fuck this was good.
This book ripped my heart out multiple times and I kept coming back for MORE. Risa you are incredible.
Luca + Noel are terrible, messy, imperfect, and unstable — together and apart from each other. That's what makes this SO GOOD. It's so raw and venerable. Emotional, mental health rep that made me think of my own family and spicy scenes that well, make me think of other things.
The ending? DELICIOUS. Thank you for breaking my heart, Risa.
This book ripped my heart out multiple times and I kept coming back for MORE. Risa you are incredible.
Luca + Noel are terrible, messy, imperfect, and unstable — together and apart from each other. That's what makes this SO GOOD. It's so raw and venerable. Emotional, mental health rep that made me think of my own family and spicy scenes that well, make me think of other things.
The ending? DELICIOUS. Thank you for breaking my heart, Risa.
January 27, 2026
This was good
The writing is exceptional
Stunning writing
These two have a hard start, not an easy road for sure.
My heart hurt for both these men.
They both need healing for sure.
They are stunning together. Thats for sure. Passionate intense intimate and vulnerable
Wasn't a fan of the cliffy... but I am hoping they resolve things in the 2nd book
June 23, 2025
I received an arc in exchange for an honest review. And honestly, my honesty is gonna sound more like a love letter to Sucker Love (and Risa Cruise). Because it is.
This is, without a doubt, an absolutely stunning debut by Risa Cruise. It’s of my top reads of 2025–if not one of my favourite books of all time (and I’ve read a few). And let me say this again: this is a debut. Keep reminding yourself this as you read, because it’s easy to assume that this is the work of an established, best selling author. It’s that good.
Right off the bat, Cruise’s connection to their characters is unmistakable. The utmost care is taken with their individual conflicts. Luca begins the story a bit awkward, a fish out of water, trying to uncover the long-buried remains of his queer identity after a failed marriage. He meets the unapologetically queer Noel, who lives his life with a courage that inspires Luca to do the same. In return, Luca gently coaxes the soft vulnerability hidden beneath Noel’s tough as nails, scrappy survivor veneer to the surface. They are both on the rebound, with nine years between them, but against all odds (and with some mutually convenient living arrangements), find themselves in each other.
The age gap isn’t a large one, but the more problematic part of an age gap isn’t always the number of years but the disparity in power. The power dynamic is subverted with Noel and Luca; it’s Noel’s apartment that Luca moves into. It’s Noel’s strength of identity that guides Luca. But it’s not one sided. When Noel struggles with the emotional ups and downs of his BPD, it’s Luca’s calm and gentle strength that he draws from. They benefit and complement each other.
The conclusion, while shattering and heartbreaking, feels necessary. Their love story deserves to be done right, and the flexibility of a duet allows the space for these complex characters to unravel their unhealthy coping mechanisms, and to grow and learn and move forward. I’m so excited to explore their relationship in book 2, and see how each of them navigate the road ahead after learning the lessons of Sucker Love.
The strength of Cruise’s writing lies in their characters. They emerge, fully formed, onto the page, so rich and full of life and complexity that you have a hard time believing they aren’t real people. They are genuinely sympathetic; there’s never a time where you’re fuming because a character acted contrary to their morals or ideals just to advance the plot or force a conflict. When presented with adversity, both characters act within the bounds of their established identities. The reader is effortlessly pulled into the story through these authentically flawed characters, and you have to keep turning the pages to see where they lead you. Cruise also has a grasp on trauma and angst that I’ve only ever seen from a small number of talented writers.
Both POVs have a unique voice. Noel is pure chaos and the writing style reflects this, loosening up punctuation rules so that Noel’s voice is a sardonic stream of consciousness that easily springboards into emotionally charged, visceral breakdowns. Luca’s voice is older, wiser and more mature, but still somehow manages to balance Luca’s raw, dominant sexuality with an awkward, fumbling innocence that is endearing.
And that’s the genius of Risa Cruise—characters that manage to straddle the line between vicious and vulnerable, bumbling and dominant. As a reader, you love them and support them—even if you don’t agree with them. Their characters could commit murder in cold blood and you’d be right there, hiding the murder weapon, helping them bury the body and protesting to all within earshot that they are innocent, damnit!
The BPD representation in this book is unmatched. Not only did Cruise manage to portray BPD authentically and realistically, but it was also so damn reasonable. I understood and felt everything alongside Noel; his emotions are so vivid and visceral that they leap off the page and pull you down into the trenches with him. And when his disconsolate despair reaches choking point, suddenly Amelia the greyhound appears with her snuffly wet nose and bandana and little feet booties and Noel’s covering his hands with his sleeves so the texture of his band aids doesn’t bother her. It’s so damn thoughtful and adorable that you’re thinking yessss Noel, everyone deserves your unbridled rage…right after snuggles with Amelia.
Luca’s long-suffering ex wife Demi deserves a special mention here. It’s so easy to demonise the ex wife and paint her as the clear antagonist in storytelling, but in doing so misses a fantastic opportunity to write deep and realistically flawed female characters. However, Cruise understands this and doesn’t reduce Demi to a two dimensional creature of unfounded evil. Her motivations are clear and sympathetic: she wants the support of her family during a difficult time, and she is entitled to that. In refusing to be a doormat for Luca, she calls him on his shit and provides an anchor point where the reader sees, for the first time, the impact of Luca’s selfishness. Luca’s expectation that Demi keep their divorce a secret from their respective families foreshadows the selfishness and ignorance he exhibits in the conclusion. Luca wants his cake and to eat it, too. And for someone who has repeatedly laid themselves down for the sake of others, this route makes sense to him. Luca’s life of sacrifice has distorted his reality so much that he can’t see the enormity of what he’s asking.
In my opinion, it’s only a matter of time before Risa Cruise’s name is displayed alongside other greats in MM romance like Alexis Hall, Cat Sebastian, Emmy Sanders, Rachel Reid, Tal Bauer etc. Sucker Love is the debut standard to which I will hang my hat on and aspire to in my own scribblings.
Read this book. Pre-order it. Buy it. Get the signed copy. Follow the author. Support talented indie writers. And remember the name Risa Cruise. 🏳️🌈
Come for me, Stuntgirl.
This is, without a doubt, an absolutely stunning debut by Risa Cruise. It’s of my top reads of 2025–if not one of my favourite books of all time (and I’ve read a few). And let me say this again: this is a debut. Keep reminding yourself this as you read, because it’s easy to assume that this is the work of an established, best selling author. It’s that good.
Right off the bat, Cruise’s connection to their characters is unmistakable. The utmost care is taken with their individual conflicts. Luca begins the story a bit awkward, a fish out of water, trying to uncover the long-buried remains of his queer identity after a failed marriage. He meets the unapologetically queer Noel, who lives his life with a courage that inspires Luca to do the same. In return, Luca gently coaxes the soft vulnerability hidden beneath Noel’s tough as nails, scrappy survivor veneer to the surface. They are both on the rebound, with nine years between them, but against all odds (and with some mutually convenient living arrangements), find themselves in each other.
The age gap isn’t a large one, but the more problematic part of an age gap isn’t always the number of years but the disparity in power. The power dynamic is subverted with Noel and Luca; it’s Noel’s apartment that Luca moves into. It’s Noel’s strength of identity that guides Luca. But it’s not one sided. When Noel struggles with the emotional ups and downs of his BPD, it’s Luca’s calm and gentle strength that he draws from. They benefit and complement each other.
The conclusion, while shattering and heartbreaking, feels necessary. Their love story deserves to be done right, and the flexibility of a duet allows the space for these complex characters to unravel their unhealthy coping mechanisms, and to grow and learn and move forward. I’m so excited to explore their relationship in book 2, and see how each of them navigate the road ahead after learning the lessons of Sucker Love.
The strength of Cruise’s writing lies in their characters. They emerge, fully formed, onto the page, so rich and full of life and complexity that you have a hard time believing they aren’t real people. They are genuinely sympathetic; there’s never a time where you’re fuming because a character acted contrary to their morals or ideals just to advance the plot or force a conflict. When presented with adversity, both characters act within the bounds of their established identities. The reader is effortlessly pulled into the story through these authentically flawed characters, and you have to keep turning the pages to see where they lead you. Cruise also has a grasp on trauma and angst that I’ve only ever seen from a small number of talented writers.
Both POVs have a unique voice. Noel is pure chaos and the writing style reflects this, loosening up punctuation rules so that Noel’s voice is a sardonic stream of consciousness that easily springboards into emotionally charged, visceral breakdowns. Luca’s voice is older, wiser and more mature, but still somehow manages to balance Luca’s raw, dominant sexuality with an awkward, fumbling innocence that is endearing.
And that’s the genius of Risa Cruise—characters that manage to straddle the line between vicious and vulnerable, bumbling and dominant. As a reader, you love them and support them—even if you don’t agree with them. Their characters could commit murder in cold blood and you’d be right there, hiding the murder weapon, helping them bury the body and protesting to all within earshot that they are innocent, damnit!
The BPD representation in this book is unmatched. Not only did Cruise manage to portray BPD authentically and realistically, but it was also so damn reasonable. I understood and felt everything alongside Noel; his emotions are so vivid and visceral that they leap off the page and pull you down into the trenches with him. And when his disconsolate despair reaches choking point, suddenly Amelia the greyhound appears with her snuffly wet nose and bandana and little feet booties and Noel’s covering his hands with his sleeves so the texture of his band aids doesn’t bother her. It’s so damn thoughtful and adorable that you’re thinking yessss Noel, everyone deserves your unbridled rage…right after snuggles with Amelia.
Luca’s long-suffering ex wife Demi deserves a special mention here. It’s so easy to demonise the ex wife and paint her as the clear antagonist in storytelling, but in doing so misses a fantastic opportunity to write deep and realistically flawed female characters. However, Cruise understands this and doesn’t reduce Demi to a two dimensional creature of unfounded evil. Her motivations are clear and sympathetic: she wants the support of her family during a difficult time, and she is entitled to that. In refusing to be a doormat for Luca, she calls him on his shit and provides an anchor point where the reader sees, for the first time, the impact of Luca’s selfishness. Luca’s expectation that Demi keep their divorce a secret from their respective families foreshadows the selfishness and ignorance he exhibits in the conclusion. Luca wants his cake and to eat it, too. And for someone who has repeatedly laid themselves down for the sake of others, this route makes sense to him. Luca’s life of sacrifice has distorted his reality so much that he can’t see the enormity of what he’s asking.
In my opinion, it’s only a matter of time before Risa Cruise’s name is displayed alongside other greats in MM romance like Alexis Hall, Cat Sebastian, Emmy Sanders, Rachel Reid, Tal Bauer etc. Sucker Love is the debut standard to which I will hang my hat on and aspire to in my own scribblings.
Read this book. Pre-order it. Buy it. Get the signed copy. Follow the author. Support talented indie writers. And remember the name Risa Cruise. 🏳️🌈
Come for me, Stuntgirl.
February 26, 2026
This book ripped my heart out, stomped on it, and left it bleeding on the sidewalk and FOR WHAT!!!!! The last 5% truly ran me ragged. Despite the gut wrenching heartache, this is one of the best books I've read since I got back into reading ~2 yrs ago. Risa's writing is perfection.
Noel and Luca are both dealing with their own mental health issues but find comfort in one another until they don't.
I am running to part II.
Noel and Luca are both dealing with their own mental health issues but find comfort in one another until they don't.
I am running to part II.
January 22, 2026
Technically, it's not a review, the story isn’t finished yet, but I do have a few words to say before I lose my mind 🤯
I am SO MAD right now 😤
And I am incredibly thankful to my past self for swearing off duologies until the whole story is out, because otherwise I would probably be breaking things instead of babbling here.
First of all, this being a debut novel is absolutely insane! Seriously, nothing about this book reads like a debut. The writing is confident, sharp, emotionally grounded, and just good. The length felt perfect, nothing dragged, nothing felt unnecessary. The pacing, the setting, the characters - it all just worked. No questions from me, solid from start to finish.
And Noel!! Such a precious, heartbreaking boy 💔
Almost every single one of his POVs hurt. He’s chaotic, messy, broken - but never OTT. His struggles feel real, raw, and painfully believable. You can feel how hard he’s trying to survive inside his own head, and my heart was aching right along with him 💔
And without spoiling things, I have to say this:
I am a mother. I’ve been one for ten years.
And I do NOT, for even one minute, agree with Luca.
I am just mad! With all his chaos and emotional turmoil, Noel was actually thinking clearly, while Luca… 🤬 nope. I get his shock, but you are almost 32, man, get it together, where is your spine?! 😡
That said, I'm off to book two. My chores or whatever can go do themselves 🙃
No electricity here in Kyiv anyway 🥺
I am SO MAD right now 😤
And I am incredibly thankful to my past self for swearing off duologies until the whole story is out, because otherwise I would probably be breaking things instead of babbling here.
First of all, this being a debut novel is absolutely insane! Seriously, nothing about this book reads like a debut. The writing is confident, sharp, emotionally grounded, and just good. The length felt perfect, nothing dragged, nothing felt unnecessary. The pacing, the setting, the characters - it all just worked. No questions from me, solid from start to finish.
And Noel!! Such a precious, heartbreaking boy 💔
Almost every single one of his POVs hurt. He’s chaotic, messy, broken - but never OTT. His struggles feel real, raw, and painfully believable. You can feel how hard he’s trying to survive inside his own head, and my heart was aching right along with him 💔
And without spoiling things, I have to say this:
I am a mother. I’ve been one for ten years.
And I do NOT, for even one minute, agree with Luca.
I am just mad! With all his chaos and emotional turmoil, Noel was actually thinking clearly, while Luca… 🤬 nope. I get his shock, but you are almost 32, man, get it together, where is your spine?! 😡
That said, I'm off to book two. My chores or whatever can go do themselves 🙃
No electricity here in Kyiv anyway 🥺
July 28, 2025
A Joyfully Jay review.
4.5 stars
Sucker Love is the first book in the Sugar Pill duet by Rise Cruise and I was really blown away by this debut story. It is heavily character driven with wonderful development of both Luca and Noel. The story is emotional and intense, super sexy, and had me totally drawn in from the beginning.
I found them fascinating and the story so engrossing, I could hardly put it down. I am quite blown away that this is a debut book, as the writing is just excellent and the characters so well developed. I am so looking forward to the conclusion and can’t recommend this story enough.
Read Jay’s review in its entirety here.
4.5 stars
Sucker Love is the first book in the Sugar Pill duet by Rise Cruise and I was really blown away by this debut story. It is heavily character driven with wonderful development of both Luca and Noel. The story is emotional and intense, super sexy, and had me totally drawn in from the beginning.
I found them fascinating and the story so engrossing, I could hardly put it down. I am quite blown away that this is a debut book, as the writing is just excellent and the characters so well developed. I am so looking forward to the conclusion and can’t recommend this story enough.
Read Jay’s review in its entirety here.
July 28, 2025
Thank you for the ARC, and this is my honest review :)
I ate this book up in ONE day, I kid you not. It's. So. Fricking. Good.
It's been a long while since I've read a book this well written it left an impact on me. I might've read this like, a month ago tbh but I still think about it at least once a day. I'm very impatiently waiting for book 2!!
First of all, the representation of mental illness in this book is top notch, very painfully realistic and beautifully unapologetic. I would not be surprised if Cruise has personal experience with bpd in one way or another. And because of this, you can't help but fall in love with Noel and his faults and sufferings and his strengths and hopes.
I don't think I've ever rooted for a character's happiness WITHOUT the love interest, but my GOD, I wish I could string *redacted* by the balls :)
I've called the plot twist at 24%, but I kept wishing it wouldn't be so, or that it wouldn't be THAT bad etc etc but the cliffhanger is definitely warranted imo. I know it might be frustrating for some people, but with the way the world and the circumstances are set, a hea is not possible without much effort and fight from BOTH characters. And everyone who has read this knows who the coward is in the relationship.
I could rave about the realism and inherent imperfection of the characters all day, but it would just be the incoherent babbling of a madman at this point. This book has definitely become one of my favourites and I'll happily reread when the duet is completed :)
I ate this book up in ONE day, I kid you not. It's. So. Fricking. Good.
It's been a long while since I've read a book this well written it left an impact on me. I might've read this like, a month ago tbh but I still think about it at least once a day. I'm very impatiently waiting for book 2!!
First of all, the representation of mental illness in this book is top notch, very painfully realistic and beautifully unapologetic. I would not be surprised if Cruise has personal experience with bpd in one way or another. And because of this, you can't help but fall in love with Noel and his faults and sufferings and his strengths and hopes.
I don't think I've ever rooted for a character's happiness WITHOUT the love interest, but my GOD, I wish I could string *redacted* by the balls :)
I've called the plot twist at 24%, but I kept wishing it wouldn't be so, or that it wouldn't be THAT bad etc etc but the cliffhanger is definitely warranted imo. I know it might be frustrating for some people, but with the way the world and the circumstances are set, a hea is not possible without much effort and fight from BOTH characters. And everyone who has read this knows who the coward is in the relationship.
I could rave about the realism and inherent imperfection of the characters all day, but it would just be the incoherent babbling of a madman at this point. This book has definitely become one of my favourites and I'll happily reread when the duet is completed :)
October 12, 2025
RISAAA I NEED TO TALK WITH YOU!!!
cause that ending broke me
I'm utterly impressed by this debut novel. The characters and their love are messy, far from perfect and the author is not scared to touch deep or difficult themes. I have only positive words for the way the BPD rep was written.
I'm mad at myself for not being able to jump into Swallow this very next minute, but I can't wait to see how their story is going to unfold.
Tropes:
Roommates
Closeted mmc x mmc who's out
Opposites
Soft Dom x bratty sub
tattoo artist x artist
age gap (8 years)
Info:
Names: Luca and Noel
Ages: 31 and 22-23
nicknames: /, stunt girl or baby
pov: dual, 1st person
Roles: strict
cause that ending broke me
I'm utterly impressed by this debut novel. The characters and their love are messy, far from perfect and the author is not scared to touch deep or difficult themes. I have only positive words for the way the BPD rep was written.
I'm mad at myself for not being able to jump into Swallow this very next minute, but I can't wait to see how their story is going to unfold.
Tropes:
Roommates
Closeted mmc x mmc who's out
Opposites
Soft Dom x bratty sub
tattoo artist x artist
age gap (8 years)
Info:
Names: Luca and Noel
Ages: 31 and 22-23
nicknames: /, stunt girl or baby
pov: dual, 1st person
Roles: strict
July 31, 2025
Still sick. And realising this is a duet so probably gonna end on a cliffhanger. Whyyyyy do I keep doing this to myself?
May 26, 2026
omg
I went in totally absolutely blind and I fell in love with these 2 my heart hurts and breaks for both of these boys they both deserve the world specially Noel !! I think the cliffhanger gutted me I couldn’t hold the tears in the last few chapters! But I loved this story and can’t wait to start the next asap!
I went in totally absolutely blind and I fell in love with these 2 my heart hurts and breaks for both of these boys they both deserve the world specially Noel !! I think the cliffhanger gutted me I couldn’t hold the tears in the last few chapters! But I loved this story and can’t wait to start the next asap!
June 5, 2026
Wowow! What a beautiful portrayal of BPD. Would write more but have to start the sequel stat. Fucking Luca.
May 2, 2026
4.25 stars rounded up. This is part one of two books which somehow I missed while I was reading it until it ended with a heart-wrenching cliffhanger. UGH! I despise it when authors do this. At times I loved Noel, but sometimes he was such a brat that I was finding it hard to like him. But as time went on I understood the reasons why. Wow! This story is a lot. At times I was mad at it and couldn’t understand all the love it received but after reading the second book I now understand. It’s a heart-wrenching love story with a HEA. Just go in knowing it’s being told over the span of two books.
September 4, 2025
⭐️ 5/5 | 🌶️ 3/5
Wow. I can’t believe this is a debut—it’s so beautifully written and overflowing with emotion.
What struck me the most is how Risa Cruise portrayed Borderline Personality Disorder. As someone who has worked in mental health for over 20 years, I was blown away by the accuracy and sensitivity with which this was handled. The heightened emotions, the fear of abandonment, the struggles in relationships, the self-harm—it was all there, rendered with care and nuance. What I loved most is that Noel was never reduced to his diagnosis. He was multidimensional, raw, and deeply human. I grew so attached to him, and his journey moved me in ways I wasn’t expecting.
Luca was equally layered. Watching him uncover who he truly is and finally take control of his own future was a beautiful arc on its own. Together, Noel and Luca faced obstacle after obstacle, and while their relationship was messy and tumultuous, it felt real. Their imperfections—their mistakes, their outbursts, their flaws—made them come alive on the page.
This story ends on a cliffhanger, with the promise of resolution in book two. The closing chapters were heartbreaking yet made complete sense for the characters’ paths. Normally, I’m all about the spice, and the scenes here were hot and well done, but for me, the emotional resonance completely stole the spotlight. This book made me feel every step of Noel and Luca’s journey, and that impact is what will stay with me the longest.
Thank you, Risa Cruise, for creating two imperfectly perfect characters and for telling their story with so much honesty and care. I can’t wait to see where book two takes them—and how they’ll continue to fight for healing and their HEA.
Wow. I can’t believe this is a debut—it’s so beautifully written and overflowing with emotion.
What struck me the most is how Risa Cruise portrayed Borderline Personality Disorder. As someone who has worked in mental health for over 20 years, I was blown away by the accuracy and sensitivity with which this was handled. The heightened emotions, the fear of abandonment, the struggles in relationships, the self-harm—it was all there, rendered with care and nuance. What I loved most is that Noel was never reduced to his diagnosis. He was multidimensional, raw, and deeply human. I grew so attached to him, and his journey moved me in ways I wasn’t expecting.
Luca was equally layered. Watching him uncover who he truly is and finally take control of his own future was a beautiful arc on its own. Together, Noel and Luca faced obstacle after obstacle, and while their relationship was messy and tumultuous, it felt real. Their imperfections—their mistakes, their outbursts, their flaws—made them come alive on the page.
This story ends on a cliffhanger, with the promise of resolution in book two. The closing chapters were heartbreaking yet made complete sense for the characters’ paths. Normally, I’m all about the spice, and the scenes here were hot and well done, but for me, the emotional resonance completely stole the spotlight. This book made me feel every step of Noel and Luca’s journey, and that impact is what will stay with me the longest.
Thank you, Risa Cruise, for creating two imperfectly perfect characters and for telling their story with so much honesty and care. I can’t wait to see where book two takes them—and how they’ll continue to fight for healing and their HEA.
November 30, 2025
DNF @ 28%
I liked how forward both Noel and Luca were with regards to their roommate agreement. Having them talk about what the other thought about sleeping with each other up front rather than ignoring the obvious elephant in the room made them seem more like adults. Though finding out that Noel has clearly unresolved anger issues + him putting Luca into sexual situations without his explicit consent immediately downgraded him. Jordan may have been cold, but I 100% do not blame him for leaving Noel if he truly was as toxic as we were shown.
When Luca saw Noel smashing the vinyls that Jordan wanted, I could not believe that Luca would be willing to comfort Noel (who's basically a stranger at this point). Any sane person would be absolutely scared off by the psycho demonstrations (which I understand is BPD, but realistically Luca wouldn't have known that). I needed to have a believable reason for Luca to want to continue living on with Noel because there was basically nothing here aside from his attraction keeping him in the story and I thoroughly believe that just sexual attraction is not nearly enough of a justification for him to want to willingly look past the numerous red flags Noel had already thrown his way.
Him randomly saying "I don't mind taking care of him" was so wildly unjustified in my eyes considering he literally just listed out all the reasons he shouldn't have been ok with things. Why didn't he mind? (The answer the story implies is that Luca already cares for Noel, and that's basically instalove at this point considering there wasn't a reason for him to care for a practical stranger at that point)
I liked how forward both Noel and Luca were with regards to their roommate agreement. Having them talk about what the other thought about sleeping with each other up front rather than ignoring the obvious elephant in the room made them seem more like adults. Though finding out that Noel has clearly unresolved anger issues + him putting Luca into sexual situations without his explicit consent immediately downgraded him. Jordan may have been cold, but I 100% do not blame him for leaving Noel if he truly was as toxic as we were shown.
When Luca saw Noel smashing the vinyls that Jordan wanted, I could not believe that Luca would be willing to comfort Noel (who's basically a stranger at this point). Any sane person would be absolutely scared off by the psycho demonstrations (which I understand is BPD, but realistically Luca wouldn't have known that). I needed to have a believable reason for Luca to want to continue living on with Noel because there was basically nothing here aside from his attraction keeping him in the story and I thoroughly believe that just sexual attraction is not nearly enough of a justification for him to want to willingly look past the numerous red flags Noel had already thrown his way.
Him randomly saying "I don't mind taking care of him" was so wildly unjustified in my eyes considering he literally just listed out all the reasons he shouldn't have been ok with things. Why didn't he mind? (The answer the story implies is that Luca already cares for Noel, and that's basically instalove at this point considering there wasn't a reason for him to care for a practical stranger at that point)
July 7, 2025
I'm super torn. I liked everything but the last 20% of this book. That ending! GAH! I just wanna punch Luca in the balls. I know their story ends in the next book, but I was so frustrated by that ending. I feel like maybe Noel and Luca aren't meant for each other after all.
September 26, 2025
Essentially cried for the last third of the book.
But I am going to need Noel and Luca to take a 5 year break from each other.
But I am going to need Noel and Luca to take a 5 year break from each other.
June 28, 2026
4.8 stars
OH OKAY. THATS FINE. EVERYTHING IS FINE
OH OKAY. THATS FINE. EVERYTHING IS FINE
July 10, 2025
"I love that he accepts my faults and flaws while still wanting to push me to better myself. He is the light to my dark." - Noel
"The minute I’m with him the rest just falls away. This is how I want to feel, all the time. Like I’m alright being me, like it’s enough." - Luca
Luca can be sweet, caring and gentle with Noel, I really loved how he helped him on the first day that he moved in. Noel just saw his ex and was spiraling because of it. Luca helped him and validated his feelings at that moment, at that point they hardly knew each other. After that moment Noel told him that he has BPD. Noel had just broken up with his ex and Luca just separated with his wife, at the start of this book. This was supposed to be a casual roommates with benefits but they built something so much more than that.
I love that Luca could show him a healthier way of how people should have treated Noel, Especially in the spicy times, it's a lot of trust that Noel gave him and Luca really paid attention to his boundaries, he took care of him, being cared for was new for Noel. Luca did something on Noel’s birthday for him and explained that he didn't expect something in return, they could just cuddle with each other just because they wanted to and not because it was expected to result in spicy time.
Sometimes it felt like Luca didn't pay attention to Noel’s triggers/feelings if it was an inconvenience for him, for example in the situation with Luca and his friends. Noel's feelings about Luca's friends were totally valid, he was literally pushed aside and that situation in combination with his past is totally understandable! And instead of listening, Luca told him to "grow up.” Later on they talked about that situation and that was a really good talk. Luca (and other characters) talked about the age gap a lot. It's not their ages, it's just the fact that they have different personalities and are their lives look a bit different. Noel is very self-aware and he has worked so hard on himself and is continuing to do so, he deserves to be seen/validated for who he is and be loved in his ups & downs.
Luca just needs to work on himself, I understand his situation is hard/difficult and that he's trying to find himself back after suppressing/denying a big part of himself for so long. But I also think that he hardly takes accountability for how he treated his wife (Demi). She just wanted to be able to move on and I felt like he held her back WHILE he was moving on. I hope he gets a lot of character development in the next book. I have complicated feelings about Luca but I absolutely love Noel, he's so strong and he's working so hard on his future. I love that he allowed himself to be fully and unapologetically himself because he deserves to feel better!
💌 About the ending 💌 Luca could've just asked... At the moment he doesn't deserve to be with someone as great as Noel is, Luca needs to put in A LOT of work to deserve Noel. I hope that he learns all that in the next book, and that Noel takes a lot of time to heal and love himself because he deserves self-love. Maybe they can both heal and create a healthier situation together? Hopefully Luca will finally take responsibility because all the people he has hurt deserve a beter version of him. And he finally gets to live the life without pretending to be someone else???
💌 Why it's 5 stars for me 💌 I do care deeply about the characters and I really care a lot about this book and how the author portrayed all the feelings, the BPD, their families, the struggles, taking care of each other, exploring new things and it really has frustrating/sweet/heartbreaking but also very heartwarming moments, the writing/characters just feels so real. They aren't perfect and that makes this book so good, they feel real. I think that they can heal together with a lot of time and communication even though the ending made their happy ever after seem so far away. I just really love Noel so so much! Luca is so unbelievably frustrating sometimes but he can also be kind that says a lot about how good the writing is. I've cried and was sobbing mostly because of how Noel felt and painful situations but I totally lost it at the end with a moment between Noel and Luca's dog Amelia. This is definitely an author that I'm going to follow! And this is Risa's first book!!! The writing is just so incredible good!
I received an ARC copy of this book.
"The minute I’m with him the rest just falls away. This is how I want to feel, all the time. Like I’m alright being me, like it’s enough." - Luca
Luca can be sweet, caring and gentle with Noel, I really loved how he helped him on the first day that he moved in. Noel just saw his ex and was spiraling because of it. Luca helped him and validated his feelings at that moment, at that point they hardly knew each other. After that moment Noel told him that he has BPD. Noel had just broken up with his ex and Luca just separated with his wife, at the start of this book. This was supposed to be a casual roommates with benefits but they built something so much more than that.
I love that Luca could show him a healthier way of how people should have treated Noel, Especially in the spicy times, it's a lot of trust that Noel gave him and Luca really paid attention to his boundaries, he took care of him, being cared for was new for Noel. Luca did something on Noel’s birthday for him and explained that he didn't expect something in return, they could just cuddle with each other just because they wanted to and not because it was expected to result in spicy time.
Sometimes it felt like Luca didn't pay attention to Noel’s triggers/feelings if it was an inconvenience for him, for example in the situation with Luca and his friends. Noel's feelings about Luca's friends were totally valid, he was literally pushed aside and that situation in combination with his past is totally understandable! And instead of listening, Luca told him to "grow up.” Later on they talked about that situation and that was a really good talk. Luca (and other characters) talked about the age gap a lot. It's not their ages, it's just the fact that they have different personalities and are their lives look a bit different. Noel is very self-aware and he has worked so hard on himself and is continuing to do so, he deserves to be seen/validated for who he is and be loved in his ups & downs.
Luca just needs to work on himself, I understand his situation is hard/difficult and that he's trying to find himself back after suppressing/denying a big part of himself for so long. But I also think that he hardly takes accountability for how he treated his wife (Demi). She just wanted to be able to move on and I felt like he held her back WHILE he was moving on. I hope he gets a lot of character development in the next book. I have complicated feelings about Luca but I absolutely love Noel, he's so strong and he's working so hard on his future. I love that he allowed himself to be fully and unapologetically himself because he deserves to feel better!
💌 About the ending 💌 Luca could've just asked... At the moment he doesn't deserve to be with someone as great as Noel is, Luca needs to put in A LOT of work to deserve Noel. I hope that he learns all that in the next book, and that Noel takes a lot of time to heal and love himself because he deserves self-love. Maybe they can both heal and create a healthier situation together? Hopefully Luca will finally take responsibility because all the people he has hurt deserve a beter version of him. And he finally gets to live the life without pretending to be someone else???
💌 Why it's 5 stars for me 💌 I do care deeply about the characters and I really care a lot about this book and how the author portrayed all the feelings, the BPD, their families, the struggles, taking care of each other, exploring new things and it really has frustrating/sweet/heartbreaking but also very heartwarming moments, the writing/characters just feels so real. They aren't perfect and that makes this book so good, they feel real. I think that they can heal together with a lot of time and communication even though the ending made their happy ever after seem so far away. I just really love Noel so so much! Luca is so unbelievably frustrating sometimes but he can also be kind that says a lot about how good the writing is. I've cried and was sobbing mostly because of how Noel felt and painful situations but I totally lost it at the end with a moment between Noel and Luca's dog Amelia. This is definitely an author that I'm going to follow! And this is Risa's first book!!! The writing is just so incredible good!
I received an ARC copy of this book.
June 21, 2025
4.5 ⭐️
*ARC received in exchange for an honest review*
THIS WAS A DEBUT?? I am honestly speechless how good this was and not what I expected at all. The depth, the pacing, the small details… I had to put the book down several times to take a breather (the emotional roller coaster this book has put me through, holy moly…) 😭😭
It’s hard to write a thorough review without spoiling the plot, especially since the cliffhanger was DIABOLICAL (also not what I expected)
Short summary: The 21- year old Noah meets a cute tattooed stranger at a bar, they flirt heavily but part ways due to a misunderst. Good thing Noah still has Luca’s card. One thing leads to another and the two become roommates - Luca needs a place to live after his divorce and Noah just getting out of a toxic relationship. The arrangement fits perfectly for both - until both want more…
✨ I have to admit that I didn’t like the drama the cliffhanger was leading us to and i especially hated how this fits into a very niche troupe that I despise (if you have read Hamartia by Scarlet Drake then yall know what I’m getting at…) which led me to withdraw 0,5 stars. But some might like this end so it’s just a personal pet peeve.
But the thing that stood out most to me was the portrayal of Noah’s borderline disorder. I have NEVER read such a realistic portrayal that it was giving me goosebumps at how real it all felt. Noah‘s unstable mental health only good worse with his relationship to Luca because he was relying on him too much. And - oh dear author you are so clever - that’s what ultimately made the novel so intimate. To be a part of Noah‘s mind which was so so devastating and heartbreaking. And yet I was torn. Which side do we take when both characters have their legitimate feelings but don’t know how to guide them and hurt each other in the process? Right, we don’t pick a side. We watch the chaos unfold.
And that’s what this book was - a chaotic mess of two people madly in love with each other and a whole lot of baggage that they definitely need to sort out (if you don’t send me an arc of the next book so I get my HE as soon as it’s done I will haunt you Risa Cruise!!!)
Also: How can you not know Placebo, Noah?? (I looooooved how Luca used Stuntgirl as a nickname - so cute 😭🤌🏻) and it also made me feel old. Congratulations now I am one of THOSE millennials 👵
Oh and a cute dog makes this book even more perfect. What more can I ask for??
*ARC received in exchange for an honest review*
THIS WAS A DEBUT?? I am honestly speechless how good this was and not what I expected at all. The depth, the pacing, the small details… I had to put the book down several times to take a breather (the emotional roller coaster this book has put me through, holy moly…) 😭😭
It’s hard to write a thorough review without spoiling the plot, especially since the cliffhanger was DIABOLICAL (also not what I expected)
Short summary: The 21- year old Noah meets a cute tattooed stranger at a bar, they flirt heavily but part ways due to a misunderst. Good thing Noah still has Luca’s card. One thing leads to another and the two become roommates - Luca needs a place to live after his divorce and Noah just getting out of a toxic relationship. The arrangement fits perfectly for both - until both want more…
✨ I have to admit that I didn’t like the drama the cliffhanger was leading us to and i especially hated how this fits into a very niche troupe that I despise (if you have read Hamartia by Scarlet Drake then yall know what I’m getting at…) which led me to withdraw 0,5 stars. But some might like this end so it’s just a personal pet peeve.
But the thing that stood out most to me was the portrayal of Noah’s borderline disorder. I have NEVER read such a realistic portrayal that it was giving me goosebumps at how real it all felt. Noah‘s unstable mental health only good worse with his relationship to Luca because he was relying on him too much. And - oh dear author you are so clever - that’s what ultimately made the novel so intimate. To be a part of Noah‘s mind which was so so devastating and heartbreaking. And yet I was torn. Which side do we take when both characters have their legitimate feelings but don’t know how to guide them and hurt each other in the process? Right, we don’t pick a side. We watch the chaos unfold.
And that’s what this book was - a chaotic mess of two people madly in love with each other and a whole lot of baggage that they definitely need to sort out (if you don’t send me an arc of the next book so I get my HE as soon as it’s done I will haunt you Risa Cruise!!!)
Also: How can you not know Placebo, Noah?? (I looooooved how Luca used Stuntgirl as a nickname - so cute 😭🤌🏻) and it also made me feel old. Congratulations now I am one of THOSE millennials 👵
Oh and a cute dog makes this book even more perfect. What more can I ask for??
June 5, 2026
This was Risa Cruise’s debut, and having recently read Wish We Were Here, it’s clear how much she’s grown as a writer. This is a very solid debut, but I definitely felt the difference. The pacing dragged for me in the middle, and I found myself getting a little bored before things picked back up.
I also struggled quite a bit with this relationship conceptually. The age gap was treated like this enormous obstacle, but after recently reading The Fire Between Us duet by Alex Cross, where the gap is fifteen years, nine years barely registered as an issue to me.
My bigger challenge was Noel’s borderline personality disorder and how it manifested in the relationship. I know this is delicate territory, but the combination of self-harm, emotional volatility, and threatening suicide when someone lets you down created dynamics that felt deeply unhealthy rather than romantic. Then there’s the relationship itself. Both men were fresh off other relationships, Luca was essentially a baby gay, they’d been together for what felt like two minutes, and suddenly it was all I love you forever energy. Even before the pregnancy reveal (and lord knows I hate a surprise pregnancy trope), I found myself thinking, “I give these two a year.”
A couple of random observations:
First, Noel’s reaction to the sex club was one of the most relatable things I’ve read in a steamy romance. It was exactly how I’ve always imagined those places—less sexy fantasy and more vaguely sticky, faintly sweaty, and smelling suspiciously like open ass. Finally, someone said it.
Second, both of their parents were terrible. I spent most of the book thinking everyone’s lives would improve dramatically if they would both just die.
The duet ends on a cliffhanger, so naturally I’m going straight into book two. At this point, I’m less invested in the romance than I am curious to see how the author manages to convince me this relationship can actually survive.
I also struggled quite a bit with this relationship conceptually. The age gap was treated like this enormous obstacle, but after recently reading The Fire Between Us duet by Alex Cross, where the gap is fifteen years, nine years barely registered as an issue to me.
My bigger challenge was Noel’s borderline personality disorder and how it manifested in the relationship. I know this is delicate territory, but the combination of self-harm, emotional volatility, and threatening suicide when someone lets you down created dynamics that felt deeply unhealthy rather than romantic. Then there’s the relationship itself. Both men were fresh off other relationships, Luca was essentially a baby gay, they’d been together for what felt like two minutes, and suddenly it was all I love you forever energy. Even before the pregnancy reveal (and lord knows I hate a surprise pregnancy trope), I found myself thinking, “I give these two a year.”
A couple of random observations:
First, Noel’s reaction to the sex club was one of the most relatable things I’ve read in a steamy romance. It was exactly how I’ve always imagined those places—less sexy fantasy and more vaguely sticky, faintly sweaty, and smelling suspiciously like open ass. Finally, someone said it.
Second, both of their parents were terrible. I spent most of the book thinking everyone’s lives would improve dramatically if they would both just die.
The duet ends on a cliffhanger, so naturally I’m going straight into book two. At this point, I’m less invested in the romance than I am curious to see how the author manages to convince me this relationship can actually survive.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 31, 2026
This book unfortunately does nothing to dispel the idea that people with BPD are short-tempered, difficult to love, and abusive towards their partners. I know the author themself has BPD, but as a fellow sufferer I was really hoping for a more balanced portrayal that wouldn’t contribute to existing harmful stereotypes about us. Having said that, there were some parts of Noel’s character that I did relate to, especially his rejection sensitivity and low self esteem, and his internal spirals were well written.
What bothered me the most was Luca though. Luca is probably the worst kind of partner for somebody with BPD, and even reading some of his interactions with Noel on the page was enough to set me off internally. He switches between hot and cold constantly, shames Noel for having very understandable feelings, takes no responsibility for the harm he causes others, belittles Noel and uses his age against him whenever it suits him, and makes zero effort to research Noel’s condition, or learn how to support him. In one breath he will say that he loves him and wants to “keep” him, and the next he acts disgusted by him, and has the audacity to say he’s just “holding a boundary”, when in fact he’s being insulting and cruel for no reason. Don’t even get me started on the ending of this book—it only solidified that Noel could do much better.
And really, I would be able to tolerate some of these things if they were at least acknowledged and part of Luca’s character development, but he doesn’t change at all, and I think leaving it all for book 2 is too little, too late.
So overall, I didn’t have a great time with this story, and I wouldn’t recommend it for its BPD rep either. I won’t be reading the next book for their HEA because I think they are fundamentally wrong for each other at this point.
What bothered me the most was Luca though. Luca is probably the worst kind of partner for somebody with BPD, and even reading some of his interactions with Noel on the page was enough to set me off internally. He switches between hot and cold constantly, shames Noel for having very understandable feelings, takes no responsibility for the harm he causes others, belittles Noel and uses his age against him whenever it suits him, and makes zero effort to research Noel’s condition, or learn how to support him. In one breath he will say that he loves him and wants to “keep” him, and the next he acts disgusted by him, and has the audacity to say he’s just “holding a boundary”, when in fact he’s being insulting and cruel for no reason. Don’t even get me started on the ending of this book—it only solidified that Noel could do much better.
And really, I would be able to tolerate some of these things if they were at least acknowledged and part of Luca’s character development, but he doesn’t change at all, and I think leaving it all for book 2 is too little, too late.
So overall, I didn’t have a great time with this story, and I wouldn’t recommend it for its BPD rep either. I won’t be reading the next book for their HEA because I think they are fundamentally wrong for each other at this point.
November 25, 2025
💫Sucker Love is Book 1 in the Sugar Pill Duet and spoiler alert besties, it may end on a cliffhanger. The story concludes in Book 2, Swallow.
Now, dear Risa, come here and let's have a chat, you and me, because... what do you mean by that ending?
You guys, I loved this book so much! This story has the perfect amount of love, smut, and hurt, connection and longing. All in all, the perfect ingredients that sucked me into this journey and got me emotionally attached to the characters.
I adore both Luca and Noel equally, and yet so differently and I can't help but give credit to the author for the way they make you get attached to both MMCs. My heart is full and I promise you, besties, that even though this is just the first part of a duet, this story is extremely satisfying from start to finish.
Tropes:
💕Age Gap
💕Hurt/Comfort
💕BPD Rep
💕Soft D/s
💕Tattoo artist x Artist
January 14, 2026
So I guess it’s a good thing I waited until the second book came out to start this, because I would be losing my mind after that ending if I had to wait to find out what happened!? DAMN YOU RISA! 😂💖
Onto book IMMEDIATELY!
Onto book IMMEDIATELY!
October 24, 2025
“When you are young they assume you know nothing…” TS, “Cardigan” –A perfect lyric for the attitude everyone, including the other MC, has toward MC Noel. 😭
But also… “Sucker love is…heaven sent… You pucker up…our passion's spent. My heart's a tart…your body's rent. My body's broken…yours is bent…” —“Every You Every Me” by Placebo, which was clearly a major inspiration for this book. The lyrics are 💯 on point. 😳😱😭
“Because every fucking time some ghost from his past shows up, he turns into another person. One I don’t recognize and who doesn’t recognize me.” —Noel, on Luca
Truer words were never thought by an MC. And this book is a cautionary tale about rebound relationships.
This book…it was book-crack for me. The power of the emotions radiated from the pages, hooking me hard and fast. And for once, if book 2 featured one MC actually finding an HEA with someone else, I’d be…into that. It doesn’t, but, seriously. I would not object.
The beginning of the book includes details that *should* have turned me off (breakup with the ex one day! Having sex with the other MC within a day or two (three???) in the same bed without changing the sheets! Normally, I’d nope out then and there!) and yet…for some reason, due to the way the author writes? I didn’t focus on things that would normally turn me off. It just didn’t matter. The chemistry between these two was so fascinating, their perspectives so believable, and they’re both in such a vulnerable place, I legit didn’t care about the circumstances and was…well, yeah, fascinated to see how they’d interact, how they so clearly each had something good for the other but were far too early in their breakups to be in a place where they could see/accept/work for what they could be to each other, and it hurt so good.
Noel is a borderline personality, and when he feels, he Feels and become self-destructive (and property destructive) and engages in some self-harm (if you need to know, he ). He NEEDS to be wanted, needs to know he’s wanted, needs a foundation of love and support that he’s never gotten. Needs someone to see through the prickly outer layer to the vulnerable marshmallow within and hold him and love him. And he’s still so competent with his work ethic and art, so functional on other levels, that it was a strong combination and didn’t make him negatively desperate/clingy. He has enough “fuck off” in him to balance the “I need you so bad.” I’ve been through his reactions, or comforted friends through the same things. One minute he’s text-begging for his ex to come back, the next he’s telling him to fuck off (in person ha ha) and breaking things and revenge-fucking Luca. It was authentic.
Noel needs security, and to not doubt he’s the center of someone’s heart. On the surface, the 10-years-older Luca seems like the person who will finally give Noel that assurance and adoration he’s never had. But…
Luca is an emotional teenager. At times he is so soft and lovely with Noel, caregiving, so very much what Noel needs. But he’s going through a divorce (from a woman) and happens to also be a spineless, gaslighting jellyfish who can’t stand up to his (dickhead) daddy, and then at just the wrong times, he becomes a self-absorbed, condescending jerk and is so bad for Noel I was spitting shards of teeth. (I quote: “You wouldn’t understand unless you were ever with someone for years. There’s so much we have to untangle.” 😱 The condescension dripped right out of my e-reader.)
It was intense. You can see the person Luca could be if he’d grow a spine and get some self-respect. That person would be so good for Noel, who is so brave and keeps picking himself up and brushing himself off, setback after setback. Which Luca needs to learn to do. But Luca is legit going through a massive life change (plus, of the two of them, this older man is the one who needs to gain maturity) and he isn’t able to see Noel clearly. Luca’s a trap, seeming perfect for Noel in some ways: cooking for Noel, having true appreciation and love for Noel’s body, a gentle warmth for Noel at times, and then being rough in a way Noel needs…Luca realizing Noel has never cuddled and doesn’t understand it and bringing Noel around to cuddling…Luca could so be the person Noel needs for support and affirmation…, and Noel is the personality type who will soak up and flourish and return in spades all the love and caring Luca has to give…it’s just that Luca isn’t There yet. They’re in two different stages of life. And it’s both gut-wrenching and riveting to read, in a heartbreaking and credible way.
Their story includes noncommunication in a way that killed me, it’s so authentic. Noel being so hurt that he’s too choked up to tell Luca exactly what upset him. Luca assuming the wrong reasons and lashing out/being a thoughtless, self-righteous prick. It was so painful…and so believable. Why doesn’t Luca just know? Why does Noel have to tell him that being called …a…friend…after they just claimed each other (I’m yours…you’re mine…) would be so hurtful? Why doesn’t Luca realize that? But he doesn’t, because he’s all about himself right now, in his selfish/self-absorbed/my-divorce-and-having-to-face-daddy-pain-comes-first era. You likely WILL want to murder Luca several times, heads up. The oblivious selfishness at times was very hard to take, and sure, maybe Noel is less mature, less able to shrug off things he could have if he were a different personality and had more self confidence too. But…honestly, some of my book notes are just “You absolute dick” “JFC” “Dump him Noel, leave RIGHT NOW. RUN!” 😂
Yet. It was in character. And I appreciate the ability to stay true to character.
Note: Luca calls Noel “stunt girl” as a supposed endearment. He got it from a T-shirt the lead singer of Placebo wears, and Luca *thinks* it’s a compliment, but…according to the dictionary, “A stunt girl was a woman investigative journalist in the late 19th and early 20th centuries in the United States. The term was often used derogatorily.” So Luca is calling Noel something both derogatory and borderline misogynistic, if you go by impact, not intent. WTF. 😱😱😱 Not cute.
Noel is also dealing with an addict parent, and the enabling on his part and the cruelty on hers was pretty awful to read. Frustrating AF. But again…credible, especially with Noel’s personality and how growing up that way would have shaped him.
Why the star off? It wasn’t for Luca being so spineless and cruel at times (though don’t get me wrong, I viscerally hated him a time or five, and if there were half stars, this’d be 3.5 for that). I was riveted seeing how their two personalities could be both good and toxic for each other due to what each was working through.
No…the star off is for the plot sinking to a cliché, overdone, please-god-never-make-me-read-this-twist-again reason for the breakup-ending. If I never see it again in a romance, it will be too soon. I know something had to twist things, but this one was disappointing. And Luca’s devolution at the end to making assumptions, assuming worst-case scenarios, making decisions for everyone without talking to anyone or even taking a beat to think it through…he fully lost my respect. The depth of the fuckery that results was still stellar though, I was impressed by the dialogue and extreme reactions and believable way it played out. This is one of the only times I’ve ended a book going…wow, I hope one MC meets someone else and book 2 is about the real romance.
Thank goodness book 2 is also out though! I need to read it RIGHT NOW buh-bye I’m off to do that! It had better involve the most satisfying, on-his-knees-begging grovel from Luca that a character has ever delivered. Because right now? Luca needs to meet the fishes wearing cement shoes. Noel, I’m here for you BB! I get you! Please don’t hurt yourself. And if you meet someone new and stronger? For once…I won’t mind a bit. Because everything you said to Luca at the end? I cheered. You were right. And sure, maybe you burned it to the ground, but, Luca didn’t give you the respect you deserved to truly talk this through and consider options. He treated you like a child. Good for you for standing up for you, Noel. Your ultimatum was 👏👏👏. Thank you for not enabling Luca’s knee-jerk reaction and decisions, made without any input from you, and his truly gross condescension.
One more notable moment—the way the scene in the sex club was handled/the choice Noel made was just stellar. Truly, he was so brave. And deserved someone worthy of him. Also, shout out to both MCs’ friend groups, especially Jamil and Danika for Noel. I know they’ll step up for him.
Cliffhanger breakup ending (and I’m still glad I read the book, despite hating that final plot twist so much!). Age gap (10 years). Stranger to lovers to roommates with benefits. Art student - tattoo artist pairing. Rebound relationship for both. OM and OW drama, used to create strong tension (often moving their fragile relationship backward). NO sex with others in the book, so, quite safe for me! Recommended, but have book 2 ready to go.
Extra note of aggravation...use of "clean" instead of "negative" when talking about STI status. Ugh.
My thanks to Gay Romance Reviews for the copy; this is my free and impartial opinion.
But also… “Sucker love is…heaven sent… You pucker up…our passion's spent. My heart's a tart…your body's rent. My body's broken…yours is bent…” —“Every You Every Me” by Placebo, which was clearly a major inspiration for this book. The lyrics are 💯 on point. 😳😱😭
“Because every fucking time some ghost from his past shows up, he turns into another person. One I don’t recognize and who doesn’t recognize me.” —Noel, on Luca
Truer words were never thought by an MC. And this book is a cautionary tale about rebound relationships.
This book…it was book-crack for me. The power of the emotions radiated from the pages, hooking me hard and fast. And for once, if book 2 featured one MC actually finding an HEA with someone else, I’d be…into that. It doesn’t, but, seriously. I would not object.
The beginning of the book includes details that *should* have turned me off (breakup with the ex one day! Having sex with the other MC within a day or two (three???) in the same bed without changing the sheets! Normally, I’d nope out then and there!) and yet…for some reason, due to the way the author writes? I didn’t focus on things that would normally turn me off. It just didn’t matter. The chemistry between these two was so fascinating, their perspectives so believable, and they’re both in such a vulnerable place, I legit didn’t care about the circumstances and was…well, yeah, fascinated to see how they’d interact, how they so clearly each had something good for the other but were far too early in their breakups to be in a place where they could see/accept/work for what they could be to each other, and it hurt so good.
Noel is a borderline personality, and when he feels, he Feels and become self-destructive (and property destructive) and engages in some self-harm (if you need to know, he ). He NEEDS to be wanted, needs to know he’s wanted, needs a foundation of love and support that he’s never gotten. Needs someone to see through the prickly outer layer to the vulnerable marshmallow within and hold him and love him. And he’s still so competent with his work ethic and art, so functional on other levels, that it was a strong combination and didn’t make him negatively desperate/clingy. He has enough “fuck off” in him to balance the “I need you so bad.” I’ve been through his reactions, or comforted friends through the same things. One minute he’s text-begging for his ex to come back, the next he’s telling him to fuck off (in person ha ha) and breaking things and revenge-fucking Luca. It was authentic.
Noel needs security, and to not doubt he’s the center of someone’s heart. On the surface, the 10-years-older Luca seems like the person who will finally give Noel that assurance and adoration he’s never had. But…
Luca is an emotional teenager. At times he is so soft and lovely with Noel, caregiving, so very much what Noel needs. But he’s going through a divorce (from a woman) and happens to also be a spineless, gaslighting jellyfish who can’t stand up to his (dickhead) daddy, and then at just the wrong times, he becomes a self-absorbed, condescending jerk and is so bad for Noel I was spitting shards of teeth. (I quote: “You wouldn’t understand unless you were ever with someone for years. There’s so much we have to untangle.” 😱 The condescension dripped right out of my e-reader.)
It was intense. You can see the person Luca could be if he’d grow a spine and get some self-respect. That person would be so good for Noel, who is so brave and keeps picking himself up and brushing himself off, setback after setback. Which Luca needs to learn to do. But Luca is legit going through a massive life change (plus, of the two of them, this older man is the one who needs to gain maturity) and he isn’t able to see Noel clearly. Luca’s a trap, seeming perfect for Noel in some ways: cooking for Noel, having true appreciation and love for Noel’s body, a gentle warmth for Noel at times, and then being rough in a way Noel needs…Luca realizing Noel has never cuddled and doesn’t understand it and bringing Noel around to cuddling…Luca could so be the person Noel needs for support and affirmation…, and Noel is the personality type who will soak up and flourish and return in spades all the love and caring Luca has to give…it’s just that Luca isn’t There yet. They’re in two different stages of life. And it’s both gut-wrenching and riveting to read, in a heartbreaking and credible way.
Their story includes noncommunication in a way that killed me, it’s so authentic. Noel being so hurt that he’s too choked up to tell Luca exactly what upset him. Luca assuming the wrong reasons and lashing out/being a thoughtless, self-righteous prick. It was so painful…and so believable. Why doesn’t Luca just know? Why does Noel have to tell him that being called …a…friend…after they just claimed each other (I’m yours…you’re mine…) would be so hurtful? Why doesn’t Luca realize that? But he doesn’t, because he’s all about himself right now, in his selfish/self-absorbed/my-divorce-and-having-to-face-daddy-pain-comes-first era. You likely WILL want to murder Luca several times, heads up. The oblivious selfishness at times was very hard to take, and sure, maybe Noel is less mature, less able to shrug off things he could have if he were a different personality and had more self confidence too. But…honestly, some of my book notes are just “You absolute dick” “JFC” “Dump him Noel, leave RIGHT NOW. RUN!” 😂
Yet. It was in character. And I appreciate the ability to stay true to character.
Note: Luca calls Noel “stunt girl” as a supposed endearment. He got it from a T-shirt the lead singer of Placebo wears, and Luca *thinks* it’s a compliment, but…according to the dictionary, “A stunt girl was a woman investigative journalist in the late 19th and early 20th centuries in the United States. The term was often used derogatorily.” So Luca is calling Noel something both derogatory and borderline misogynistic, if you go by impact, not intent. WTF. 😱😱😱 Not cute.
Noel is also dealing with an addict parent, and the enabling on his part and the cruelty on hers was pretty awful to read. Frustrating AF. But again…credible, especially with Noel’s personality and how growing up that way would have shaped him.
Why the star off? It wasn’t for Luca being so spineless and cruel at times (though don’t get me wrong, I viscerally hated him a time or five, and if there were half stars, this’d be 3.5 for that). I was riveted seeing how their two personalities could be both good and toxic for each other due to what each was working through.
No…the star off is for the plot sinking to a cliché, overdone, please-god-never-make-me-read-this-twist-again reason for the breakup-ending. If I never see it again in a romance, it will be too soon. I know something had to twist things, but this one was disappointing. And Luca’s devolution at the end to making assumptions, assuming worst-case scenarios, making decisions for everyone without talking to anyone or even taking a beat to think it through…he fully lost my respect. The depth of the fuckery that results was still stellar though, I was impressed by the dialogue and extreme reactions and believable way it played out. This is one of the only times I’ve ended a book going…wow, I hope one MC meets someone else and book 2 is about the real romance.
Thank goodness book 2 is also out though! I need to read it RIGHT NOW buh-bye I’m off to do that! It had better involve the most satisfying, on-his-knees-begging grovel from Luca that a character has ever delivered. Because right now? Luca needs to meet the fishes wearing cement shoes. Noel, I’m here for you BB! I get you! Please don’t hurt yourself. And if you meet someone new and stronger? For once…I won’t mind a bit. Because everything you said to Luca at the end? I cheered. You were right. And sure, maybe you burned it to the ground, but, Luca didn’t give you the respect you deserved to truly talk this through and consider options. He treated you like a child. Good for you for standing up for you, Noel. Your ultimatum was 👏👏👏. Thank you for not enabling Luca’s knee-jerk reaction and decisions, made without any input from you, and his truly gross condescension.
One more notable moment—the way the scene in the sex club was handled/the choice Noel made was just stellar. Truly, he was so brave. And deserved someone worthy of him. Also, shout out to both MCs’ friend groups, especially Jamil and Danika for Noel. I know they’ll step up for him.
Cliffhanger breakup ending (and I’m still glad I read the book, despite hating that final plot twist so much!). Age gap (10 years). Stranger to lovers to roommates with benefits. Art student - tattoo artist pairing. Rebound relationship for both. OM and OW drama, used to create strong tension (often moving their fragile relationship backward). NO sex with others in the book, so, quite safe for me! Recommended, but have book 2 ready to go.
Extra note of aggravation...use of "clean" instead of "negative" when talking about STI status. Ugh.
My thanks to Gay Romance Reviews for the copy; this is my free and impartial opinion.
November 14, 2025
After reading some reviews, I was afraid I wouldn't like it because of its supposed "overdramatic" nature, but I don't see the book that way. The book is not OTP at all, but rather a realistic portrayal of human nature and the fact that we are not perfect and we all make mistakes. (If I had known that the book contained BPD representation, I would definitely have picked up this book earlier—all books with more complex characters or representations of different diagnoses are always more interesting to read.)
Noel is a relatable character in terms of his emotions, insecurity, and need for reassurance. It was personally frustrating to read about how he was sometimes misunderstood—tho understandably so, given his behavior at times. This did cause the aforementioned drama, but I don't think the author takes it too far, and Noel also has the ability to clearly express his feelings, and Luca also helps make this more easier, and the arguments also become solved in the book—in my opinion, the book is balanced in that regard.
I also liked Luca's character; he gives Noel the opportunity to learn how to be loved, accepted, and understood. However, Luca is human too and makes mistakes. And thank goodness I got to read the next part right away, because the ending...
I hope the author will write more books in the future. I really liked her writing style; it is clear but not too simple, with a good balance of internal monologue and dialogue. The plot and chapters progressed logically, the spice was also well written, and the chemistry was clearly visible on the pages. The book contains banter and light conversation, but also deeper thoughts and discussions. Everything was well balanced.
Noel is a relatable character in terms of his emotions, insecurity, and need for reassurance. It was personally frustrating to read about how he was sometimes misunderstood—tho understandably so, given his behavior at times. This did cause the aforementioned drama, but I don't think the author takes it too far, and Noel also has the ability to clearly express his feelings, and Luca also helps make this more easier, and the arguments also become solved in the book—in my opinion, the book is balanced in that regard.
I also liked Luca's character; he gives Noel the opportunity to learn how to be loved, accepted, and understood. However, Luca is human too and makes mistakes. And thank goodness I got to read the next part right away, because the ending...
I hope the author will write more books in the future. I really liked her writing style; it is clear but not too simple, with a good balance of internal monologue and dialogue. The plot and chapters progressed logically, the spice was also well written, and the chemistry was clearly visible on the pages. The book contains banter and light conversation, but also deeper thoughts and discussions. Everything was well balanced.
November 9, 2025
Initially I dnfed this, but with all the comments saying "omg that ending was awful"
I decided to continue reading, because the premise did hook me.
Thank you GRR for the arc!
I don't feel like I can rate this, because that ending??? I'm genuinely wondering how it will work out between them. I have my theories, but I'm really hoping everything isn't what it seems. I know their story is messy, but I don't want it to be this messy...jeez.
It got hard to tell the two of them apart, and I feel like Luca is the problem in the book bc he's just really spineless and unable to take a stand.
He is a μαλάκα/ malaka Bah.
Giving me a chance to utilize the only Greek I know 😂
He doesn't deserve Noel, so he better grovel.
He's with Noel as fwb but still is pretending to be married to have his father be happy?
He's all over the place and really just needs therapy.
I usually like toxic stuff, but despite him being older, Noel felt like the more cohesive, consistent and put together one.
Idk I don't really see them working out as a couple, but I want them to.
I decided to continue reading, because the premise did hook me.
Thank you GRR for the arc!
I don't feel like I can rate this, because that ending??? I'm genuinely wondering how it will work out between them. I have my theories, but I'm really hoping everything isn't what it seems. I know their story is messy, but I don't want it to be this messy...jeez.
It got hard to tell the two of them apart, and I feel like Luca is the problem in the book bc he's just really spineless and unable to take a stand.
He is a μαλάκα/ malaka Bah.
Giving me a chance to utilize the only Greek I know 😂
He doesn't deserve Noel, so he better grovel.
He's with Noel as fwb but still is pretending to be married to have his father be happy?
He's all over the place and really just needs therapy.
I usually like toxic stuff, but despite him being older, Noel felt like the more cohesive, consistent and put together one.
Idk I don't really see them working out as a couple, but I want them to.
January 20, 2026
¨I’m not done being upset. He wasn’t supposed to come find me. He was supposed to stay in there and pal around with stupid Killian for another hour or two while I caught hypothermia and maybe died and then he would’ve been sorry.¨
I love Noel messy ass haha.
I like a good story about miscommunication, jealousy and people acting like idiots but I can't let go of the fact that Luca seems like a different person when he argues with Noel, it's as if the author was forcing his rudeness and cruelty. Every time they argue the only thing I could think about is ¨Who is this man?¨ The Luca I've spent the last 100 pages getting to know wouldn't talk to Noel like that.
I love Noel messy ass haha.
I like a good story about miscommunication, jealousy and people acting like idiots but I can't let go of the fact that Luca seems like a different person when he argues with Noel, it's as if the author was forcing his rudeness and cruelty. Every time they argue the only thing I could think about is ¨Who is this man?¨ The Luca I've spent the last 100 pages getting to know wouldn't talk to Noel like that.
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