What do you think?
Rate this book
Revealing: The Underrated Power of Oversharing
A groundbreaking book on the surprising potential of sharing more of ourselves with others, with profound impacts on our personal and professional relationships, from a celebrated Harvard Business School professor and leading expert on disclosure decisions.
Do you overshare, divulging way more personal information than a situation warrants? Or do you err on the side of silence, even when it means passing up an opportunity for making an authentic connection? We're constantly deciding how much to disclose about ourselves and what we’re thinking and feeling. The decision of how forthcoming to be can be difficult, even excruciating.
For over fifteen years, behavioral scientist and Harvard Business School professor Leslie John has been studying the choices we make every day—at work and at home, with our spouses, friends, colleagues, and even strangers—about how much to reveal about ourselves. A growing body of research shows we vastly underestimate the value of oversharing. Often, when an epic overshare leaves us cringing with shame, the person we’ve shared with is actually happy to have been confided in. Yet so many of us have come to see what would be beneficial disclosure as TMI.
Getting disclosure decisions right has a powerful effect on your daily happiness, your relationships, your career, and your health. Sharing more freely can improve your mental and physical wellbeing. Likewise, undersharing can deprive you of opportunities to build friendships, gain the trust and support of colleagues and employees, and maybe, even, to find a life partner.
Revealing equips readers with the awareness to make even the thorniest of disclosure decisions with aplomb. John offers the latest scientific insights about how to hone your self- and situational awareness so that in any given moment, you can make a good decision about just how much you want to share and why.
Do you overshare, divulging way more personal information than a situation warrants? Or do you err on the side of silence, even when it means passing up an opportunity for making an authentic connection? We're constantly deciding how much to disclose about ourselves and what we’re thinking and feeling. The decision of how forthcoming to be can be difficult, even excruciating.
For over fifteen years, behavioral scientist and Harvard Business School professor Leslie John has been studying the choices we make every day—at work and at home, with our spouses, friends, colleagues, and even strangers—about how much to reveal about ourselves. A growing body of research shows we vastly underestimate the value of oversharing. Often, when an epic overshare leaves us cringing with shame, the person we’ve shared with is actually happy to have been confided in. Yet so many of us have come to see what would be beneficial disclosure as TMI.
Getting disclosure decisions right has a powerful effect on your daily happiness, your relationships, your career, and your health. Sharing more freely can improve your mental and physical wellbeing. Likewise, undersharing can deprive you of opportunities to build friendships, gain the trust and support of colleagues and employees, and maybe, even, to find a life partner.
Revealing equips readers with the awareness to make even the thorniest of disclosure decisions with aplomb. John offers the latest scientific insights about how to hone your self- and situational awareness so that in any given moment, you can make a good decision about just how much you want to share and why.
304 pages, Hardcover
Published February 24, 2026
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews
April 22, 2026
Leslie John is a Canadian-American behavioral scientist and professor of business administration at Harvard Business School whose research interests include decision making. Her 2026 book Revealing is part-memoir (in the spirit of her own self-disclosure), part-pop psychology book on how to decide how much or how little information to disclose to others in efforts to build or deepen relationships. Subject-matter-wise, it reminded me quite a bit of fellow academics David Bradford and Carole Robin's 2021 book Connect: Building Exceptional Relationships with Family, Friends, and Colleagues, as well as writer David Brooks' 2023 book How to Know a Person: The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen, as well as fellow HBR professor Alison Woods Brooks' 2025 book Talk: The Science of Conversation and the Art of Being Ourselves (incidentally, I believe I recall John namechecking Brooks briefly in this book, talking about how you'd think they'd be rivals given their somewhat overlapping research fields but are actually good colleagues?).
I felt the amount of self-disclosure and stories that were based on John's personal life were a bit too much in this book, but I get why she included them. I did find some of her anecdotes interesting and insightful, though she also repeated anecdotes I've heard in other pop psychology books. I would recommend readers start with Connect and consider Revealing as a supplement if they remain interested in the topic.
My statistics:
Book 67 for 2026
Book 2373 cumulatively
I felt the amount of self-disclosure and stories that were based on John's personal life were a bit too much in this book, but I get why she included them. I did find some of her anecdotes interesting and insightful, though she also repeated anecdotes I've heard in other pop psychology books. I would recommend readers start with Connect and consider Revealing as a supplement if they remain interested in the topic.
My statistics:
Book 67 for 2026
Book 2373 cumulatively
February 27, 2026
Ever wish you said less? This book uses data to show that thoughtful disclosure builds trust, credibility, and connection. Oversharers unite!
March 7, 2026
Reading Revealing by Leslie John made me envy Professor John’s Harvard Business School students. Any professor who makes social science this much fun must be a powerhouse in the classroom. Especially striking is just how revealing John is of her own foibles, from making a snarky remark when interviewing for a job to bursting into tears in the middle of a professional presentation – although if you keep turning pages (which you will be impelled to do), what seemed like a foolhardy reveal in the moment often turns out to have been a savvy move. By mapping the risks of both silence and transparency, John offers a research-backed masterclass on the high-stakes art of navigating between TMI and TLI (John’s term for “too little information”) at work and in life.
May 9, 2026
Liked the sentiment. It's more a book about different sorts of relationship dynamics and the effects that communication can have on them. Actually made me want to sit down and fill out a pros and cons list ahead of sharing something with somebody when the outcome is uncertain. And I liked the bits about oversharing at work; usually workplace-related chapters in books like this are a snore for me (up there with chapters on parenting), but degrees of emotional vulnerability in a professional environment are a personal point of interest. I think it needed a bit more on the negative outcomes of revealing and the work required to face them.
March 3, 2026
A great book from start to finish. My personal favorite is Chapter 7, which offers fresh and memorable insights on the science of friendship.
Review of advance copy received from Publisher
A lively, engaging, and eye-opening book, full of fascinating research, ideas, and stories! John's arguments are compelling, even gripping. What a relief to learn that my oversharing impulses are actually working for me, steering me towards closer relationships and better wellbeing. This book should have a positive impact on many people - and hopefully on our world as well.
April 25, 2026
I did not expect to enjoy Leslie John’s Revealing: The Underrated Power of Oversharing as much as I did. By nature, I tend to share only what needs to be shared. If I don’t see a clear point or purpose—especially with personal information—I keep it to myself. After reading Revealing, I’m now more inclined to be forthcoming.
John explains how impact bias—our tendency to overestimate the strength and duration of emotional events—holds many of us back from opening up. At the same time, she wisely cautions us to examine our motivations: Are we sharing to connect and inform, or are we really seeking validation?
Knowing that John is a Harvard Business School professor and a fellow Canadian gave the book extra appeal for me. Her academic background gave me confidence that the ideas are grounded in solid research, and her Canadian perspective made her voice feel familiar.
Throughout the book, John shares candid personal stories that make her highly relatable. We’ve all faced our own challenges, and her willingness to be vulnerable strengthens the message. That said, at times the book felt more like listening in on a therapy session than a business or self-development read. While I appreciate personal anecdotes, I would have loved a concise summary at the end of each chapter—something like “Share more in these situations and share less in others.” Anecdotes are powerful but inherently unique, so clear, practical guidance would have helped the lessons apply more broadly.
Overall, Revealing caused me to reassess how I interact with others, and that alone makes it valuable. I recommend it to anyone who tends to play their cards close to the chest.
John explains how impact bias—our tendency to overestimate the strength and duration of emotional events—holds many of us back from opening up. At the same time, she wisely cautions us to examine our motivations: Are we sharing to connect and inform, or are we really seeking validation?
Knowing that John is a Harvard Business School professor and a fellow Canadian gave the book extra appeal for me. Her academic background gave me confidence that the ideas are grounded in solid research, and her Canadian perspective made her voice feel familiar.
Throughout the book, John shares candid personal stories that make her highly relatable. We’ve all faced our own challenges, and her willingness to be vulnerable strengthens the message. That said, at times the book felt more like listening in on a therapy session than a business or self-development read. While I appreciate personal anecdotes, I would have loved a concise summary at the end of each chapter—something like “Share more in these situations and share less in others.” Anecdotes are powerful but inherently unique, so clear, practical guidance would have helped the lessons apply more broadly.
Overall, Revealing caused me to reassess how I interact with others, and that alone makes it valuable. I recommend it to anyone who tends to play their cards close to the chest.
February 25, 2026
This book is a delight. Not only did this book change my thinking about when/how/why I share (or don't), it was funny and entertaining and poignant the whole way. I especially admire how much the author shares of her own life story, as well as the moving stories of those who've aided her research (I'm thinking of Paul!). I've tended to be a sharer, which sometimes makes me feel embarrassed, and this book has wholly reassured me that it's an asset, not a liability. (I received an advanced copy of this book)
April 18, 2026
Surprised that this book doesn’t have more reviews. Thoughtful, witty, research-backed.
We’ve all been there. We’ve said more than what we’ve later felt comfortable with. We’ve also all been in friendships that started or got stronger by a revelation (a thought, a story, an emotion, etc).
It’s dangerous and varies by context and culture in terms of implications, but it happens and we’re people. I’m more reserved than most people I could think of, but the book offered me some great reflection opportunities.
We’ve all been there. We’ve said more than what we’ve later felt comfortable with. We’ve also all been in friendships that started or got stronger by a revelation (a thought, a story, an emotion, etc).
It’s dangerous and varies by context and culture in terms of implications, but it happens and we’re people. I’m more reserved than most people I could think of, but the book offered me some great reflection opportunities.
February 27, 2026
An essential, research-backed nudge to take a chance and open up more. Maybe it'll help you feel less lonely. :)
March 20, 2026
Interesting and some good insights. Some chapters more helpful and relevant than others. The work one especially.
Did Not Finish
April 9, 2026Excellent book, I was unable to finish in time for my loan at the library. I look forward to finishing it when I’m able to borrow it again.
Want to Read
April 10, 2026Andover - Memorial Hall Library
153.6 JOH
Haverhill Public Library
153.6/JOHN L
Lawrence Public Library 153.6 JOH
Newburyport Public Library 153.6 JOH
153.6 JOH
Haverhill Public Library
153.6/JOHN L
Lawrence Public Library 153.6 JOH
Newburyport Public Library 153.6 JOH
May 5, 2026
Excellent,interesting and easy to read ,shows how revealing can help you connect with others while also explaining too little information and too much information.
Did Not Finish
May 6, 2026I heard the author on a podcast. Thought I might like her book. I just couldn’t get into it. Started skimming half way through. A DNF for me.
May 9, 2026
Fantastic, worthwhile read.
Review of advance copy received from Author
Too many books are being written on the same topics in the psychology space. Resilience. Burnout. Polarization. Happiness.
And then along comes a gem like this on self-disclosure. This topic might sound boring but you have not read the work of Leslie John. This professor knows how to tell stories, frame ideas, and introduce new concepts.
If you’re interested in an intellectual smoothie combining affective science, evolutionary psychology, an a modern take on how to win friends and infringe people, this will be your jam.
And then along comes a gem like this on self-disclosure. This topic might sound boring but you have not read the work of Leslie John. This professor knows how to tell stories, frame ideas, and introduce new concepts.
If you’re interested in an intellectual smoothie combining affective science, evolutionary psychology, an a modern take on how to win friends and infringe people, this will be your jam.
April 24, 2026
Revealing completely changed how I think about oversharing. What many of us assume is risky, awkward, or even unprofessional turns out to be far more nuanced. Leslie John draws on serious behavioral science to show that we often underestimate the power of sharing and overestimate the dangers.
What I appreciated most is that this isn’t a blanket endorsement of “tell all.” It’s a smart, evidence-based exploration of when sharing builds trust and when it backfires. The concept of “Too Little Information” especially stuck with me. Silence can quietly erode connection just as much as oversharing can damage it.
The writing is clear, engaging, and deeply credible. You can feel the research behind every claim, but it never reads like a textbook. It’s the kind of book that makes you rethink conversations you’ve had for years.
Highly recommended for anyone interested in communication, leadership, relationships, or simply understanding how we connect.
What I appreciated most is that this isn’t a blanket endorsement of “tell all.” It’s a smart, evidence-based exploration of when sharing builds trust and when it backfires. The concept of “Too Little Information” especially stuck with me. Silence can quietly erode connection just as much as oversharing can damage it.
The writing is clear, engaging, and deeply credible. You can feel the research behind every claim, but it never reads like a textbook. It’s the kind of book that makes you rethink conversations you’ve had for years.
Highly recommended for anyone interested in communication, leadership, relationships, or simply understanding how we connect.
Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews