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324 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2005

"I am going to fill this book, and fill it and fill it with all the wonders I am about to see. I am going to write poems, stories, novels, the words of my children: I am going to write the story of my life...
"What a gift life is, what a strange and terrible responsibility it is to live...
"Let me be equal to it, let me feel its ecstasies and terrors.
"Let me give everything it is within my soul to give, plunge headlong into the fullest rush of life...Let life begin!"
"Should I have been more engaged in the public world instead of caught up in the vanity of believing I was making a testament to life through writing? Have I been generous enough to my husband, to my daughters, to my friends?
"...I tried to capture the experience of felt life in a net of meaning - some glimpse, some nuance that would reveal something at the heart of life, its mysterious core. But all my words have been stillborn things, too frail to support the great hopes I held for them...Everything has fallen short of my intentions..."
"I grew up surrounded by people turning their emotional lives into fiction...
"The mechanism by which she lived was broken."