What Kept You?

by Raaza Jamshed

A coming of age novel in a world marked by political turmoil and the threat of violence
As a child in Pakistan, Jahan was raised on her grandmother’s stories, influenced by the demons of folklore, and the memory of violence and forced displacement caused by the British partition of India – tales that taught her to be wary of the world. But her grandmother’s life, filled with quiet defiance, hints at another truth. Jahan rebels against the constraints she lives under as a young woman growing up in Lahore, and migrates to Australia, where she meets her husband, whose family is Arabic. As she reckons with the unruliness of her body after a miscarriage, and the bushfires which threaten their home and their horses on the rural outskirts of Sydney, she is forced to confront the violence that haunts her, against women, animals, and in nature
A feminist anti-tale, written in a unique, compelling and expressive style, What Kept You? explores survival, metamorphosis, and the radical freedom of choosing one’s own ending.

Genres: Fiction, Literary Fiction

223 pages, Kindle Edition

Published July 1, 2025

Reviews

[Karl · Rating 3 out of 5]

A personal and interior story, from the narrator's perspective, as she processes the cultural adjustment as an immigrant from Pakistan to Australia, homesickness, the grief of a miscarriage, and the loss and guilt of unresolved issues between her and her beloved grandmother, back in Pakistan. All set against a backdrop of Australian heat, drought, and apocalyptic bushfires. And while that all sounds so bleak - the writing is beautiful, so many amazing passages and carefully written prose. Self assured self knowledge.

[Sarah Malik · Rating 5 out of 5]

Raaza has created something so quietly beautiful and lyrical; the images conjured and just conveying every shade and flicker of emotion that happens between people, from the momentary rage Jahan feels before Ali walks up to her in the park, the humiliation at the slam as the male 'genius' radical poetry artist addicted to applause forces her into one last supplication – 'a poet who liked to call himself starving but ate every meal' ha!!

But most of all, the way Raaza captured the culture and people, I felt this in my bones – using both English and Urdu, without translation or apology, felt like being transported. When Choti asks 'Chor ya Chuwa'? and phrases Maa Baap, and Daal mein kuch kala hein, and juma prayers, and portraits of Jinnah, gosh I savoured every line. And those climactic gripping scenes at the end – I felt my heart beating wildly with fear. The scene at the market, when the energy shifts as the men turn to girls like prey (before that final devastating scene) or that terrifying vulture party scene which reminded me of Best of Friends by Kamila Shamsie where the girls go on the Karachi joyride that becomes a kidnapping. It's a reminder of the vulnerability and razor sharp edge young women traverse in a violent patriarchal world where fun can easily turn into terror, trauma and devastation.

Even the lunch scene with the Arab family, and the shades painted of the Muslim experience in a western culture that treats all Muslims as a monolith. This South Asian depiction in this context felt really exciting. I really felt like I was inhaling the vapours of a world I really knew but was also linked to something new – country Australia, bushfires, landscape.

Raaza has created this link between my old world and my new world, and it's something I am so grateful for. I think Raaza is a brilliant and important writer, and I can't wait to read more from her.

[Ali · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Many of these stories are old and I’ve told them to you before. Each telling a way to mend the gashes in memory, each telling a chance to colour the details that won’t hold. Each time, a new furnishing, a new nail to pin down the wings of a truth that flutters just out of reach."
"You know, Nani, how easily I fall for stories, no matter who or what has to bleed to tell them."
Jamshed's writing is luscious, dripping with imagery and emotion, conveying a beautiful maelstrom that is consuming her protagonist from the inside, even as rabid wildfires approach from the outside. Jahan has a lot going on: a recent bushfire, a relatively new marriage, and a deeply hidden grief following the death of her grandmother. All this barely covers a consuming, and guilt laden, set of emotions about what happened in Pakistan before she migrated to Australia.
And alongside Jahan's interior world, Jamshed gives us the fears she has inherited from her compelling grandmother, a world that creeps with threat and shadow, monsters lurking around every corner. The narrative skips around, revealing Pakistan and the events, alongside the current day. But while there is a reasonable amount of plot, this is not a plot-driven novel. Jamshed explores the nature of memory, the way fear - and through it trauma - resonates across generations, the ways we connect through obscured reality sometimes more than reality stripped bare. The whole cast of characters - seen largely through Jahan's eyes - spring alive from the page. At times it can be clumsy, or unintentionally confusing (also, often, intentionally confusing I think), but at it's strongest this is a breathtaking book, rich in linguistic flourish and emotionally ambitious, and somehow feeling very different to anything else I have read.

[Emma Balkin · Rating 4 out of 5]

The stories assembled by Raaza Jamshed seem quite autobiographical. The collection meanders through memories of the protagonist, Jahan, recounting her experiences to her grandmother, Nani. Much of the writing is addressed to ‘you’, sometimes reflecting on shared experiences and sometimes explaining events from Jahan’s point of view. Her original country, Pakistan, is constructed as a place where she felt restricted and fearful, but nevertheless shapes her and her understanding of her place in the world. She makes a life and falls in love in country Australia but continues to be shaped by her past.

[Sonia Mohsin · Rating 5 out of 5]

The words flowed like water. Raaza has a unique and captivating writing style that will hook you from the very first page. The story twists and turns as it wraps you into the world of Jahan. Her character is so complex and yet so simple, I loved her very relatable conversations with her grandmother, which is actually the entire book- Jahan describing her life experiences to her grandmother and interlacing it with the lessons she taught. I loved reading it! Filled my heart with so much joy like a good book should. Definitely recommend…this is now one of my favourite books!

[Maryam · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was gut-wrenching in ways I didn't expect. I stuck through the first two chapters for the language; it poetic, and twists and turns in the most unimaginable ways, but once I hit the third chapter mark, it picked up pace and I felt myself hurling through a world full of menace and beauty. I'm recommending it to my book club!

[CanadianReader · Rating 2 out of 5]

Slow, heavy, somber, and excessively, distractingly lyrical. No matter how interested I might be in the subject matter, I knew I wouldn’t be able to endure nearly 200 pages of this. Prose style and reader preference were not a good match.

[taro · Rating 3 out of 5]

hmm. a mixed bag for sure. the most diaspora novel to ever exist Lol. SEE U ALL AT BOOKCLUB!

book club conclusion- try again mama!