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Audible Audio
Published September 11, 2025
Which sounds like seashell, or rather say shall. When we get there, it is spitting with rain, and clouds descend over the verdant mountainside. The sand is black and soft. A whole beach of crushed Oreos.
'All my nerves are singing. My mother is lying in bed with the lamp on above her, and in the dim light it looks as if she has no eyelashes. Her eyes are panicked, roaming the room. 'All my nerves are singing! I hold her hand. I'll have a sip of water. I take the glass from the bedside table and place the straw by her mouth. The catheter at her leg is full, and I hook it up to a bag in the bin to drain it, lifting her leg down from its pillow, talking as I move. 'It helps when you say what you're doing. I think about how much needs to be articulated, all the time, the degree to which my mother has to explain, instruct, request - and with Precision. Singing nerves and words, words, words.
You, pedalling your arms
above your head in bed,
that bad arm
suddenly mobile and flexible ……
You, with the ellipses
of your emails. Your strong
front crawl. Your assertive
gestures as you motion
through talk.
Now, when I swim, the movement of my arms
is for you. A high arc
fingertips cleaving bright.
Shuddering kick of legs.
The sea pool in Seixal
is for you. Craggy rocks
and my head dipped below.