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Capable: How to Teach Your Kids the Strengths, Skills, and Strategies to Build Resilience
Today's kids face unprecedented levels of anxiety, depression, and emotional distress. Despite our best efforts, our children continue to struggle with internal and external pressures that impact their mental health. If we're doing all we can to make sure our kids are happy, why aren't they?
Beloved therapists, speakers, and authors Sissy Goff and David Thomas have discovered the key is found in one capable. Capable kids are confident kids who don't shrink from challenges. They're resilient kids who get back up when life knocks them down. They're thriving kids because they have a deep belief in their ability to do hard things, overcome roadblocks, and keep moving forward.
In Capable, Sissy and David draw on their more than fifty years of combined counseling experience to offer a clinically sound, emotionally attuned, faith-informed approach to help kids build the resilience they need in today's world. Through evidence-based insight and practical guidance, Sissy and David equip you to nurture capability--the internalized belief that a child can face adversity, navigate challenges, manage stress, and build confidence in who they are and who God has made them to be.
Beloved therapists, speakers, and authors Sissy Goff and David Thomas have discovered the key is found in one capable. Capable kids are confident kids who don't shrink from challenges. They're resilient kids who get back up when life knocks them down. They're thriving kids because they have a deep belief in their ability to do hard things, overcome roadblocks, and keep moving forward.
In Capable, Sissy and David draw on their more than fifty years of combined counseling experience to offer a clinically sound, emotionally attuned, faith-informed approach to help kids build the resilience they need in today's world. Through evidence-based insight and practical guidance, Sissy and David equip you to nurture capability--the internalized belief that a child can face adversity, navigate challenges, manage stress, and build confidence in who they are and who God has made them to be.
296 pages, Hardcover
Published April 21, 2026
About the author
Sissy Goff
28 books239 followersSISSY GOFF, M.Ed., LPC-MHSP spends most of her days talking with girls and their families, with the help of her counseling assistant/pet therapist, Lucy the Havanese. She has worked as the Director of Child and Adolescent Counseling at Daystar Counseling Ministries in Nashville, Tennessee since 1993, with a Master’s degree from Vanderbilt University. Sissy speaks to parents across the country and is the author of eleven books including Raising Girls. and her newest books, Raising Worry-Free Girls and Braver, Stronger Smarter (for elementary school girls) which will be released in September of 2019.
Sissy is a regular contributor to various podcasts and publications, including their own soon-to-be released podcast called Raising Boys and Girls. You can find more information and resources at www.raisingboysandgirls.com.
Sissy is a regular contributor to various podcasts and publications, including their own soon-to-be released podcast called Raising Boys and Girls. You can find more information and resources at www.raisingboysandgirls.com.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 124 reviews
May 26, 2026
I love following Sissy Goff on Instagram and always find her to be so wise and thoughtful. I really enjoyed this book! I loved that both authors narrate and did so very conversationally. I also really appreciate the way they acknowledge the differences of boys and girls and the ways each may need a different approach. I mostly loved their balance in talking about the need for empathy and acknowledgement of feelings with the littles we love, matched with the boundaries, appropriate consequences and challenges that they need to help them grow into the best versions of themselves. Really engaging, thought-provoking, and practical!
July 18, 2026
Incredible. So many tangible takeaways for right now and to revisit in the years to come raising three girls!
May 20, 2026
Read this primarily for work, secondarily for my own parenting. Highly, highly recommend.
I found this book to be incredibly relevant to my work as a pediatric mental health therapist and described about 90% of the presenting concerns parents identify when they bring their kids to see me. To sum it up: low frustration tolerance that is impacting school/homework/social relationships/extra curriculars/home life etc. I agree with the authors’ assessment that parents have (thankfully!) grown much in emotional attunement with their kids, but are mostly stopping there. We can name emotions and empathize but don’t also help kids with what to do next. The emphasis is on emotions without learning the skills to navigate them. Often, rescuing kids from discomfort or distress instead of helping them develop the skills needed to tolerate the distress.
Their work is research filled and rich with practical ways to help kids develop sturdiness and resilience (which includes emotional intelligence!).
The counselors who wrote this book are Christians and they talk about their faith occasionally as is relatable to the content. This is helpful for recommending to Christian parents who are wary of reading counseling related books (🙃), but the way it is incorporated would not prevent me from recommending to clients who ascribe to a different faith or are not religious at all.
I found this book to be incredibly relevant to my work as a pediatric mental health therapist and described about 90% of the presenting concerns parents identify when they bring their kids to see me. To sum it up: low frustration tolerance that is impacting school/homework/social relationships/extra curriculars/home life etc. I agree with the authors’ assessment that parents have (thankfully!) grown much in emotional attunement with their kids, but are mostly stopping there. We can name emotions and empathize but don’t also help kids with what to do next. The emphasis is on emotions without learning the skills to navigate them. Often, rescuing kids from discomfort or distress instead of helping them develop the skills needed to tolerate the distress.
Their work is research filled and rich with practical ways to help kids develop sturdiness and resilience (which includes emotional intelligence!).
The counselors who wrote this book are Christians and they talk about their faith occasionally as is relatable to the content. This is helpful for recommending to Christian parents who are wary of reading counseling related books (🙃), but the way it is incorporated would not prevent me from recommending to clients who ascribe to a different faith or are not religious at all.
August 3, 2026
wow wow wow I love this book. I love anything these two write super helpful and practical and the season of parenting. I listen to it so I went really slow, but I want to get the physical book next because there was a lot of good questions and prompts that I wanna have access to in written form
June 7, 2026
Packed with great tips & wisdom. Will be referencing this one for years to come!!!
June 17, 2026
Definitely the best parenting book I’ve read. Such important principles here and great stories, well told and inspiring. With good practical takeaways and ideas for application, but also getting at the heart of it very well.
July 22, 2026
I have really enjoyed other books and podcasts by these authors, and this was no exception. So many great practical takeaways from them as professionals, but plenty of reminders that we are the right parent for our kid. A very encouraging book in the midst of a difficult parenting season.
May 31, 2026
The best parenting book I have read in awhile- felt like a timely listen. Took a lot of notes- if I had a physical copy I imagine it would be well highlighted! Looking forward to doing the workbook with my children.
July 7, 2026
This was a good read, and one that I would recommend to parents with kids of really any age. David Thomas in particular is a favorite of mine in the parenting space (particularly boys) because of the way he addresses parenting with both grit and grace. The first third of the book focused heavily on the "why" of capability, but I was most interested in the "how," which there was quite a bit of in the later portions. As I was listening, I identified that this is my husband's natural inclination when parenting- feeling capable and believing our children are infinitely capable as we give them tools. I think that has been a real gift to us all and set in motion much of what was being discussed here already.
April 16, 2026
Thank you NetGalley & RB Media for providing me an audiobook arc in exchange for my thoughts and opinions.
Since this is a faith based book, I’d like to disclose upfront I had a faith based upbringing but I am no longer a religious person. I am however a parent that walks in the world around many different faiths and beliefs. I like to read parenting books across these various backgrounds to get a reference of how other parents are approaching child rearing.
Capable focuses on how to create confident and resilient children through faith centered teachings. Honestly I went into this book very apprehensive but I was pleasantly surprised to find a lot of good references integrated throughout the ideologies presented. Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt and Good Inside by Dr. Becky being two references that stood out to me. I believe Sissy Goth and David Thomas to be well read and researched, they have extensive experience counseling kids and families and I was encouraged they have clearly read what I find to be important texts in modern parenting.
Capable Parenting is a rebranding of the Authoritative Parenting style as discussed in the book. While I appreciate the concept of giving it a different name, generally I find myself disagreeing with the amount of parental authority and control that is required to raise resilient children that believe in themselves and take risks. I also firmly disagree with the assignment of gender roles in handling boys vs girls and father daughter relationships vs mother son relationships. I completely understand these arguments from a framework of faith. One thing I learned in my days as an evangelical, gender norms and constructs are generally used to uphold power dynamics and create a degree of rigidity in social environments that make everyone feel more “comfortable.” Like playing into expected roles will provide understanding on who you can be.
Disagreements aside, I can understand my feelings are based off my own experiences, and do not automatically make this a bad book. There are useful tools here, and I would have probably been in a much better position in my own childhood if my parents had consulted a book such as this. I do believe Sissy Goth and David Thomas to be individuals who care about children and parents achieving harmony in their lives.
Since this is a faith based book, I’d like to disclose upfront I had a faith based upbringing but I am no longer a religious person. I am however a parent that walks in the world around many different faiths and beliefs. I like to read parenting books across these various backgrounds to get a reference of how other parents are approaching child rearing.
Capable focuses on how to create confident and resilient children through faith centered teachings. Honestly I went into this book very apprehensive but I was pleasantly surprised to find a lot of good references integrated throughout the ideologies presented. Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt and Good Inside by Dr. Becky being two references that stood out to me. I believe Sissy Goth and David Thomas to be well read and researched, they have extensive experience counseling kids and families and I was encouraged they have clearly read what I find to be important texts in modern parenting.
Capable Parenting is a rebranding of the Authoritative Parenting style as discussed in the book. While I appreciate the concept of giving it a different name, generally I find myself disagreeing with the amount of parental authority and control that is required to raise resilient children that believe in themselves and take risks. I also firmly disagree with the assignment of gender roles in handling boys vs girls and father daughter relationships vs mother son relationships. I completely understand these arguments from a framework of faith. One thing I learned in my days as an evangelical, gender norms and constructs are generally used to uphold power dynamics and create a degree of rigidity in social environments that make everyone feel more “comfortable.” Like playing into expected roles will provide understanding on who you can be.
Disagreements aside, I can understand my feelings are based off my own experiences, and do not automatically make this a bad book. There are useful tools here, and I would have probably been in a much better position in my own childhood if my parents had consulted a book such as this. I do believe Sissy Goth and David Thomas to be individuals who care about children and parents achieving harmony in their lives.
June 25, 2026
4.5 stars rounded up!
I refer to Sissy and David as my “parenting gurus,” and for good reason. So much wisdom in this, as well as practical steps for helping our kids become confident and capable humans.
I refer to Sissy and David as my “parenting gurus,” and for good reason. So much wisdom in this, as well as practical steps for helping our kids become confident and capable humans.
July 3, 2026
4.5 stars rounded up! I enjoy their podcast, so this book is a great fit for my family.
July 16, 2026
Reading this through the lens of a teacher and just felt super encouraged by the message of this book.
Biblical based, bite-sized, tangible strategies and ideas
Biblical based, bite-sized, tangible strategies and ideas
June 23, 2026
This was an excellent book that I’d heard mentioned on a podcast! In a day and age where mental health issues and entitlement seem to run rampant, this book (written by two counselors) offers suggestions, strategies, and skills that help create more capable kids.
May 17, 2026
Two therapists talk about how kids are becoming more anxious and depressed because their parents are denying them the chance to fail. Lots of great suggestions for how to help kids develop strength and capability.
July 14, 2026
Highly recommend as a counselor and parent!
June 9, 2026
This entire book felt like I was sitting at a table with Sissy and David soaking in some practical and helpful parenting wisdom. They did an excellent job of challenging, encouraging and giving practical advice for all ages and stages of parenting. 5⭐️ all day!
June 10, 2026
Truly a great parenting book! While there were plenty of things that I had heard elsewhere, the overall tone and message was worthwhile and included a good number of new techniques/advice, along with a healthy dose of reminders. Definitely a worthwhile read for parents who want to be capable and teach their kids how to be capable, as well.
August 1, 2026
Great practical guidance for Christ following parents.
May 19, 2026
This was SO good. Encouraging and challenging and practical. I’m going to need a physical copy of the book to use as a resource regularly! Ready to go raise capable, confident kids!
July 21, 2026
Always such a big fan of anything Sissy Goff writes
May 12, 2026
I had no idea this was written from a religious perspective before picking it up. I disliked the bible verses included within. There was also a major lack of real world “do this” type of help. Most of it is theoretical or extremely specific stories of things that happened to their children therapy clients.
For example, “failing forward” was mentioned many times and I was looking forward to learning how to do that. When I finally got to the failing forward section it just defined what it was, a quote from “How to teach kids not to quit” (a different book), but gave absolutely no examples of how to apply this in real life.
Also, the managing emotion section focuses primarily on anger, and talked about yelling or acting out in other ways. Not once did I see a mention of sadness or anxiety. There are more emotions than anger that children experience!!
For example, “failing forward” was mentioned many times and I was looking forward to learning how to do that. When I finally got to the failing forward section it just defined what it was, a quote from “How to teach kids not to quit” (a different book), but gave absolutely no examples of how to apply this in real life.
Also, the managing emotion section focuses primarily on anger, and talked about yelling or acting out in other ways. Not once did I see a mention of sadness or anxiety. There are more emotions than anger that children experience!!
June 29, 2026
Such a great book on helping our kids from childhood into adulthood as a capable human. It is valuable for any stage of parenting while your kids are still under your roof. Very practical. There is some crossover with anxious generation in helping prepare them to be independent but there were also some new tools.
Here were some of my big takeaways!
- Sometimes we just need to stop talking and give empathy instead of fixing
- My job is to develop your character so you can take age appropriate risks
- Help kids get from chaos to calm
- What am I modeling in this season that's helpful?
- Start with support, end with a challenge and encouragement
- Facing challenges is how kids grow
- What are two things you are doing for your kids that they can do for themselves
- Settling the glitter - there is a lovely picture inside but the snow (emotions) are swirling so much you can't see the image of you so we need to help settle the feelings
- Help them assume the best about themselves and others
- We can't be everything to everyone all the time - show grace to yourself
- Be the rubber band parent where they can go and stretch and then bounce back
- How can I support you on being independent in this area?
- Fail = first attempt at learning
- Assume the best and be curious about the rest
Here were some of my big takeaways!
- Sometimes we just need to stop talking and give empathy instead of fixing
- My job is to develop your character so you can take age appropriate risks
- Help kids get from chaos to calm
- What am I modeling in this season that's helpful?
- Start with support, end with a challenge and encouragement
- Facing challenges is how kids grow
- What are two things you are doing for your kids that they can do for themselves
- Settling the glitter - there is a lovely picture inside but the snow (emotions) are swirling so much you can't see the image of you so we need to help settle the feelings
- Help them assume the best about themselves and others
- We can't be everything to everyone all the time - show grace to yourself
- Be the rubber band parent where they can go and stretch and then bounce back
- How can I support you on being independent in this area?
- Fail = first attempt at learning
- Assume the best and be curious about the rest
June 20, 2026
I had high hopes for this book - a follow up to Anxious Generation from a Christian perspective. But it disappointed me. The book’s organization was hard to follow, the writing style felt unprofessional, and the content felt so…annoying? I’m still struggling to articulate why I disliked it so much. I think their advice and tips were more suited for a 60 minute counseling session, not for day in, day out, 24/7 parenting. Everything helpful they said was said better in Anxious Generation.
May 27, 2026
I’m gonna need Sissy Goff and David Thomas to hold my hands until all of my kids reach adulthood.
I pretty much hate all parenting books besides theirs 😂
Their books are so practical, easy to read, and are a perfect balance of science and godly.
This book was especially helpful for me as I parent older kids that are cultivating autonomy and independence (still a great read for all ages though —I wish this existed years ago!)
I think they do a really great job at addressing current / post covid parenting trends and calling us parents out on our nonsense (in the most loving way), and then practically pointing us in the right direction.
10/10 recommend
I pretty much hate all parenting books besides theirs 😂
Their books are so practical, easy to read, and are a perfect balance of science and godly.
This book was especially helpful for me as I parent older kids that are cultivating autonomy and independence (still a great read for all ages though —I wish this existed years ago!)
I think they do a really great job at addressing current / post covid parenting trends and calling us parents out on our nonsense (in the most loving way), and then practically pointing us in the right direction.
10/10 recommend
July 22, 2026
I really did enjoy how practical this read was. I can apply things to my life now as a toddler mom, but also keep things in mind as my kids grow even through teen years. It was an encouraging and convicting read.
The book became heavy about the enneagram during the second half, which I’m not so much a fan of, hence my 3 star (3.5, really).
The book became heavy about the enneagram during the second half, which I’m not so much a fan of, hence my 3 star (3.5, really).
June 26, 2026
This is the single most important parenting book to read currently. It’s well researched and has great action steps. Great for any parent, teacher or care giver to read no matter the ages of the children in their care.
August 7, 2026
I loved this book. It was super practical which is something I need when it comes to parenting books. It helped me realize how capable my kids are, ways to help them realize it too, and practical ways to implement it and practice skills. Chapters are short and pacing is quick.
May 6, 2026
a must read!
May 15, 2026
I was able to access the advanced audiobook through Netgalley.
I was eager to listen to this book as I have previously read many of the works of both David Thomas and Sissy Goff and have continually found their writing to be immensely valuable. This book didn’t disappoint, even despite going in with high expectations. They maintained their tender, counseling voices while filling me with a treasure trove of insights, practical advice, and things to ponder and pack away for later. I plan to read the physical copy in the future and will likely be highlighting and annotating quite a bit. Highly recommend!
I was eager to listen to this book as I have previously read many of the works of both David Thomas and Sissy Goff and have continually found their writing to be immensely valuable. This book didn’t disappoint, even despite going in with high expectations. They maintained their tender, counseling voices while filling me with a treasure trove of insights, practical advice, and things to ponder and pack away for later. I plan to read the physical copy in the future and will likely be highlighting and annotating quite a bit. Highly recommend!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 124 reviews