When God Seems Distant: Surprising Ways God Deepens Our Faith and Draws Us Near

by Kyle Strobel, John Coe

What If Times of Spiritual Dryness Are Actually Part of God's Plan?
· Discover how to reframe times when God feels distant
· Go beyond willpower and habit modification to true spiritual growth
· Learn to live in , not just through, fallow times

Most Christians experience zeal early in their Christian life, but when that fades to a season of dryness, it's tempting to assume one of two We have failed or God is absent. So we throw ourselves into ministry, spiritual disciplines, and study in order to break through to the other side of this dry season, not realizing that willpower and habit modification cannot "fix" our spiritual lives or kick-start a new season of spiritual growth. Why? Because we've missed the point of the wilderness.

Far from being evidence that we're failing in our faith, spiritual dry seasons are actually part of God's plan to draw us into a deeper walk with him. With the wisdom and compassion of those who have been there, Kyle Strobel and John Coe invite you to draw near to the Lord as you walk through the differing seasons of the soul. They explain the purpose of the wilderness in the story of God's people--including our Savior--and show how our spiritual lives actually benefit from times of dryness.

If you have found yourself in the desert, desperately longing for the living waters Jesus promises, this book will assure you that God is not absent--and you may be on the cusp of experiencing a deeper faith.

Genres: Christian, Faith, Nonfiction, Theology, Religion, Christian Living

206 pages, Kindle Edition

Published February 3, 2026

About the author

Kyle Strobel is a husband, father, friend, theologian, writer, speaker, and practitioner of spiritual formation. He is a Jonathan Edwards scholar, and seeks to bridge the gap between the scholarly world and the life of the church.

Kyle is the co-author of Where Prayer Becomes Real: How Honesty with God Transforms Your Soul, The Way of the Dragon or the Way of the Lamb: Searching for Jesus' Path of Power in a Church that has Abandoned It,Beloved Dust: Drawing Close to God by Discovering the Truth About Yourself , and is the author of Formed for the Glory of God: Learning from the Spiritual Practices of Jonathan Edwards.

You can find Kyle at Twitter.com/KyleStrobel; Facebook.com/KyleCStrobel

Reviews

[Mari Sample]

I had a really long review typed up, and then it got deleted. So I’m going to keep this one short. This is the best book outside Scripture about spiritual formation that I’ve ever read. If, like me, you’ve been hurt or confused about why your spiritual life doesn’t seem to be producing the same passion or intense sense of God’s nearness that it used to and that you see in others, this book will be massively encouraging to you. We have a God who is at work in all things, and who does not fear the truth of our hearts. Hard to explain how almost eerily known I felt as I read. Very thankful for this one!

[Jared · Rating 3 out of 5]

A good primer on spirituality in dry seasons. I appreciate Strobel and Coe’s key categories—consolation, desert, and desolation—derived from the Puritans. The authors helpfully explore these differing developmental stages in Christian spirituality, unpacking not only how a believer’s experience differs in each season but how God’s purposes differ in each as well.

Consolation is a time when we’re drinking spiritual milk and experiencing the joy and comfort of newfound faith and obedience. Desert and desolation occur when the Lord uses the experience of spiritual dryness and distance (even absence) to expose our remaining sinful nature to expose the ways we rely on our flesh for spiritual growth instead of resting In Christ and his finished work.

In dry seasons, a believer must guard against merely pumping up his will (moralism) or seeking an adrenaline rush (i.e., chasing emotional passion more than true affection for Christ). On these points, chapters 6 and 7 were particularly strong. I underlined the definition of moralism (p. 100) and the discussion of God as purifying fire (p. 120). Loved this quote: “Even our goodness needs purification from sin and self because the opposite of sin is not simply goodness but faith.”

Yet on the whole, I think the book did a better job defining the conditions of dryness and desolation than the remedies. It’s clear about the chief remedy—abiding in Christ by remembering our justification (pp. 96–97) but I wish the authors had said more about the means of grace—confession, prayer, and the Word. Perhaps this instruction is in their previous book ‘Where Prayer Becomes Real’ or maybe this was simply an attempt to avoid promoting performative spirituality, but I think the average believer could use some concrete handholds alongside the bigger picture concerns.

This relates to a more minor concern about the writing/editing. At times, the book felt a bit rambling. I would’ve appreciated more precise definitions, more thorough exegetical discussions, and even more stories. Often, the authors’ experiences of dryness were described rather than narrated; I wanted them to show me their experience and not just tell me about it.

Finally, I think this would be a good companion volume to Matthew Bingham’s ‘Heart Aflame for God.’ Each book’s strengths complement the other’s weaknesses. I’d give it 3.7 stars.

[Cole Rogers · Rating 3 out of 5]

The premise of the book was made very clear: the reality of one’s relationship with God, spiritual growth, etc cannot be measured by passion or emotion. The temptation is to actually puff ourselves up with passion so that we feel good about our relationship to God. The authors call us into honesty with God, to confess to him our lack of passion and need for Jesus in our attempt to manufacture it within ourselves.

While this hit home with me, the majority of the book was redundant and I feel like it over explained our problem without giving much depth to the solution of grace (it was there, but was overwhelmed by the amount of content diagnosing the problem).

Another critique: I’m not a writer and I listened to this book. But one thing that stood out (maybe more noticeably bc I listened to it) is that the authors’ writing style was so redundant. There are way too many series used (love, truth, and grace). It was overwhelming and a little annoying ha.

Overall, I wouldn’t recommend walking through this book slowly. It’s something you can skim and get the main idea. Then move on.

[Andrew Wright · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kyle and John do a fantastic job of defining and discussing the different seasons we experience in life with Jesus. Whether in consolation, desert, or desolation, this book challenges you to not only to see how God may be at work, but even more to view that season as the gift that it is.

The thought of viewing spiritual dryness or desolation as a gift from God to reveal to us areas of our life that he wants to hand over to him is introduced early on and is reflected on throughout. To me, this was a fresh perspective (although, according to the authors, not a new one historically) on the experience of the Christian life and helped reframe how we should think about spiritual growth.

My only critique is that I was left wanting some more practical wisdom of what abiding with the Lord may look like in these seasons, especially as it relates to the later discussion of spiritual disciplines. However, I understand this is the topic of an upcoming book, so that critique itself may be premature all things considered.

If the aim of this book was to put words to the spiritual highs and lows that we often experience and talk about, then the authors certainly accomplished that effectively. I highly recommend reading this book!

[Kara · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thought the authors did a good job of addressing the ups and downs of the spiritual life (terms used were consolation, desert, and desolation). I read this with my 15 and 17 year old boys. We’ve read “Practicing the Way” together in the past, so this was a helpful book to also work out that one. My biggest thing with this one was having an intentional conversation around the desert time-that it WILL come, anticipate it, but what is it an opportunity for, and how can we use that time to allow God to transform us while being aware of our brokenness. Instead of manufacturing a passion for God through the habits getting increased, the desert is a gift to allow us to be honest before God, face Truth, and rest in our faith and His grace and strength. I believe we need to have a full understanding of our life here with Christ, what it will look like and feel like at various times, and teach people about that so someone can’t say “I tried God, and He didn’t work for me”. Knowing what’s coming is the full counting of the cost as we should never try and trick people in that life with Christ is all rainbows and heart felt worship. It’s not. But this isn’t a bad thing! I gave it 4 stars because I did think parts of it were repetitive, but still think it’s an important read to be included for the concept & perspective around spiritual formation.

[Cassie (eclectically.bookish.cassie) · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.75 stars

This is a thought-provoking and challenging text, not in reading level but in content. I am still sitting with the ideas days after finishing. On one hand the concept that believers go through seasons of early consolation, the desert, and desolation in their walk with God felt revelatory. I had not thought much about how often I rely on my feelings and a hope to return to the past excitement of my early days of faith. I felt probed by the authors' questions about whether I use spiritual disciplines as a means to "fix" what feels broken when I am dry or God feels far off. The application sections of each chapter inspired thoughtful and prayerful reflection as well.

That being said, I still found myself wishing I could have enjoyed this more. Some of the chapters felt very repetitive and some of the best content was in the final sections on pathways for moving forward from here. I wish those ideas had been incorporated throughout rather than presented as next steps. And while I was pushed in my worldview and theology in a good way, I can also see how this book could be a source of discouragement if read without the right lens in mind. It felt a little like once consolation is over all that lies ahead is desert and desolation. Overall, the ideas here were good, but the execution was not as effective or hopeful as it could have been.

Thank you to NetGalley and Baker Books for the digital review copy.

[Greg Wood · Rating 5 out of 5]

I came to When God Seems Distant already familiar with Kyle Strobel’s work—particularly Where Prayer Becomes Real (co-authored with John Coe), Formed for the Glory of God, and his Substack writing. I anticipated that the insights here would be helpful, and I was not disappointed!

The central problem the authors address is one most Christians know well: the experience of feeling that God is not working, paired with the subtle assumption that we must now fix ourselves. Strobel and Coe gently but firmly dismantle that assumption. They help us see that God’s activity has not ceased when our feelings go quiet; rather, our gracious God is revealing aspects of our character and long-habituated responses to life that still exhibit our need for His love, grace, and mercy. God is not absent—He is inviting us to live honestly with Him in the reality of our lives. In this, the book shows clear continuity with Where Prayer Becomes Real, while also extending and deepening those insights.

One of the book’s great strengths is that it is evident the authors have paid close attention to how the Lord actually works in the lives of His children. This wisdom is going to be striking, new, and enlightening to the ears of many, though it is not absent in the Protestant and Reformed traditions further back in our history. These are not abstract principles, but pastoral insights offered for the good of the church. The opening chapter’s analogy is especially memorable and clarifying: the Christian life is likened to a peaceful lake in our early years of faith—sun shining, waters calm, joy abundant. But as God matures us, the lake is drained, and what was always at the bottom is revealed. This exposure is not God’s withdrawal, but His loving work of transformation, teaching us where deeper dependence on Him is required.

Another strength is the way the book wraps up, proposing five paths that readers may walk after reading the book. These paths are tailored for Christians in various places in life. What this does is to help readers envision the Lord drawing us near wherever we are in our journey, encouraging us to wrestle further with the questions that will inevitably arise through the reading.

Stylistically, the book feels written by fellow travelers, not academics. It is highly accessible, experiential in tone, and intentionally invitational. The authors consistently encourage readers not merely to understand these insights but to be before the Lord with them. I believe there is much to be gained if readers will actually engage the “Experience” sections that conclude each of the chapters.

If I were to offer any critique, it would be that at times I felt like the authors were repeating themselves, but I think this is a function of my reading the book over a short period. I believe this repetition will be helpful for anyone reading it over a longer period or for referencing / review specific chapters later.

Personally, I found many moments where the authors’ experiences mirrored my own journey and response to seasons of spiritual dryness (disorientation, attempting to compensate with mere passion). One of the most searching and helpful themes is their exposure of how easily we resort to self-willed religious effort. We do “spiritual things,” yet fail to involve the Lord Himself. I know this tendency well. The way the authors name and address this dynamic has already helped me abide more intentionally in Christ.

I gladly commend the insights the Lord has given these men regarding spiritual formation. This book has substantial practical value, particularly for Christians who feel frustrated by the “ups and downs” of their spiritual growth. Strobel and Coe help us see how our pursuits may have actually taken us away from the One we are drawn to. I have already had fruitful conversations about this book with my small group, and I plan to purchase multiple copies to give to fellow travelers who may feel disoriented by God’s apparent distance.

I give When God Seems Distant five stars. I anticipate lifelong benefit from the way it is already drawing me nearer to the Lord and reshaping how I look for His activity in my life.
I was provided an advance copy for review; the opinions here are my own.

[Bob · Rating 4 out of 5]

Summary: How God’s path of growth takes us into the desert, the way it exposes our self-will, and how we abide in God’s love.

One of the things that often accompanies new life in Christ is a deep sense of God’s presence, what the authors of this book call consolation. Often, experiences of worship, Christian community, personal Bible study and prayer deepen that sense. Until it doesn’t. How ought we understand and respond to that? We wonder if it is something we did. Then, if that’s not the case, we double down on the things that gave us a sense of God’s presence. Or we look for new practices.

Kyle Strobel and John Coe describe how this happened with them. It felt like they were in a dry place, a desert. And they discovered that these times of desolation, just as much as consolation, come from God. Specifically, God takes us into such times to expose deeper patterns of sin. He also takes us into learning to abide in Him rather than engage in sin management or self-improvement efforts. We learn to trust God rather than experiences or a set of practices. But its scary, just like being weaned.

The authors then address the “self-willed spirituality” that the desert teaches us to unlearn. Over five chapters, they explore different ways the self-will manifests. First, they discuss self-generated passion and experiences of excitement and devotion to generate a sense of God’s presence. Second, they turn to how we deal with brokenness in our lives, either by coverups or by trying to “fix” ourselves. Underlying this is pride. The desert exposes these, inviting us to draw near to be forgiven and loved. Third, we resort to goodness, the path of moralism. We use goodness to win God’s favor and then struggle under the burden of conscience when we fail. Again, in the desert, God invites us to come close and to let him do what we can’t.

Fourth, we try devotion. The authors observe, “There is a massive difference between using God to fix your life and knowing that Christ is your life” (p. 124). Paradoxically, we can either use spiritual practices in a self-help fashion or as a means to wait upon God. Lastly, and this has been implicit throughout, we try to fix ourselves rather than let our awareness of our inadequacy move us to surrender, to openness to what God’s Spirit would do.

The final part of the book, then, emphasizes the alternative to self-willed spirituality. It is the spirituality of surrender, of coming with all the mess the desert reveals. It is drawing near, not to an idea of God but God himself. We come not because we love, but that he has loved us in Christ. The book then concludes with five paths that individuals and churches might take in response. Particularly striking were those addressed to churches as a whole that often fail to address the desert, and to pastors.

I found the honesty about the desert as a normal part of Christian experience helpful. Many of our churches make people feel themselves failing in some way if they are experiencing this. Rather, they should be teaching people “desert spirituality.” Also, the second part of the book was so helpful in identifying our self-help strategies that we embrace in pride, rather than bring our messy selves to God. Finally, there is the wonderful news that all this is to teach us to abide in and rest in God’s love, whether there are feelings or not. God wants us to grow into a resilient trust.

_____________

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received a complimentary copy of this book from the publisher for review through LibraryThing’s Early Reviewers Program.

[Brittany · Rating 5 out of 5]

What an amazing read! This is a book to refer back to time and time again, as it is packed with so many nuggets of wisdom and insight pulled right from scripture. The authors did a wonderful job at explaining the seasons that you go through in your faith walk and how it is not all "polished" or fruitful. There are times in following Jesus where it is messy or dry or painful, and these words show readers that we can turn to Him in all of those times. We don't have to muster up enough will or discipline in order to be enough for Jesus - He already covered that through His own actions on the cross. This book was a great reminder of the way in which the Lord embraces all of the parts of us, if only we would let Him in and show Him. He is not scared by the process, but rather wants to help us through it. I will say that this book is not necessarily easy to digest, but it is thought-provoking and needed to keep pushing through hard seasons of faith.

There were many quotes that stood out to me, but here are a few I jotted down:

"Desolation is the Lord revealing the truth that we long to establish ourselves more than seeking life in him and with him." (page 51)

"We are tempted to think we are saved at the cross and then formed through our own savvy and effort. But spiritual formation is not actualizing ourselves. Spiritual formation is losing our self-made and self-established life to know life in Christ." (page 115)

"But even our goodness needs purification from sin and self because the opposite of sin is not simply goodness but faith." (page 128)

"...you are struggling too much to be able to say with confidence that you know the love of God. Don't try to generate faith in these moments. Don't try to fix yourself. Instead, graps ahold of your struggle, fears, worries, and needs, and bring all of that to the Lord. Come out of hiding and tell him exactly what you are feeling and thinking and wrestling with. Be open to his forgiveness, mercy, and love." (page 143)

"When you go to pray or practice a discipline, and you feel the bottom drop out and the gas tank goes down to E, remember that the goal is not to supercharge your will to get it done. The goal is to go to God and say, God, I need YOU." (page 173)


I received a copy from Revell Books for LibraryThing's Early Reviewers January 2026 batch. A positive review is not required & all opinions are my own.

[Emma · Rating 4 out of 5]

When God Seems Distant by Kyle Strobel; John Coe
Surprising Ways God Deepens Our Faith and Draws Us Near

What If Times of Spiritual Dryness Are Actually Part of God's Plan?
· Discover how to reframe times when God feels distant
· Go beyond willpower and habit modification to true spiritual growth
· Learn to live in, not just through, fallow times

Most Christians experience zeal early in their Christian life, but when that fades to a season of dryness, it's tempting to assume one of two things: We have failed or God is absent. So we throw ourselves into ministry, spiritual disciplines, and study in order to break through to the other side of this dry season, not realizing that willpower and habit modification cannot "fix" our spiritual lives or kick-start a new season of spiritual growth. Why? Because we've missed the point of the wilderness.

Far from being evidence that we're failing in our faith, spiritual dry seasons are actually part of God's plan to draw us into a deeper walk with him. With the wisdom and compassion of those who have been there, Kyle Strobel and John Coe invite you to draw near to the Lord as you walk through the differing seasons of the soul. They explain the purpose of the wilderness in the story of God's people--including our Savior--and show how our spiritual lives actually benefit from times of dryness.

If you have found yourself in the desert, desperately longing for the living waters Jesus promises, this book will assure you that God is not absent--and you may be on the cusp of experiencing a deeper faith.
The book is easy to read and understand.
A good resource.
I recommend this book.
When God Seems Distant by Kyle Strobel; John Coe
is a 4-star book.
I am looking forward to reading more books by Kyle Strobel; John Coe.
I voluntarily read and reviewed an advanced readers copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions shared here in this review are my own.

[Tim Warke · Rating 4 out of 5]

As Christians we all face dry spells, difficult seasons, times when we feel God is far off. And sometimes we can't understand why. It may not be due to obvious sin in our lives. The authors help us to understand what they call times of consolation and desolation - that is spiritual highs and lows.

They explain how and why this might be, and what God might be doing in and through us in such times. A lot of the book is on how we might wrongly react to such times. Drawing away from God ourselves, or doubling down on spiritual disciplines, seeking to 'pump up' our spiritual enthusiasm, or seeking to do more in our own strength.

A lot of it stems from the key message of Galatians, having been saved by grace and then trying to live in our own strength and works. There is so much that is helpful in here however I did feel that there were some aspects of the book that could have been more compact, there is a degree of repetition of thought I found.

It is a falsehood to think we should always live in the midst of a high of spiritual passion. "Rather than in passions, we are called to live in abiding affection."

Their dealing with spiritual disciplines and spiritual formation is so balanced. Of course such disciplines are important and valuable, but we can mistake them as the end rather than the means. We can forget that the goal is not the practice of the disciplines themselves, but to actually draw near to God. And we can use them to mask our heart issues. "It is just easier to list a series of spiritual practices to get done than it is to draw near to a holy God."

I would recommend this book to those who are in times of dryness and maybe even moreso to those who are on the mountain tops - so they can be prepared for how God works in the different and challenging situations of life.

[CFBC Library · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don’t remember ever thinking that God seemed distant. Only that he was silent, perhaps because I turned away from him or maybe for the reason I was so insignificant that I couldn’t expect him to answer. So I wasn’t very enthusiastic about reading this book. Thankfully, I had the opportunity to read it anyway and I was surprised where it lead.

Essentially the authors are saying that God never leaves us, but we face times of struggle because he desires us to trust him and not ourselves. They use the terms “consolation”, “desert”, and “desolation” to describe what believers go through. Consulation when we feel close to Lord, like that new Christian excitement, desert when God seems distant or angry, and desolation when it appears he is no where to be found. It took awhile for me to grab ahold of those terms. I never considered that the Lord testing me was simply to direct me to have faith in him and not because I was a sinner. The problem, as the authors note, is that Christians too often try to stir up that emotional closeness we had in “good” times serving the Lord by working harder or doing more, trying thus to gain what can only be achieved through putting are trust in Him.

Anyway, though I found the book was repetitive, I think that actually helped me more clearly grasp a theological concept I found new yet strangely familiar. It made perfect sense in light of scripture. I highly recommend this book for any Christian striving to remain close to God in the midst of hard times.

—reviewed by BH

[Nathan Bridgeford · Rating 5 out of 5]

personally, this is the most helpful book on spiritual formation i’ve ever read. while it never touches the rhetorical or philosophical heights of something like the Divine Conspiracy, it is positively resolute in reminding us that the entire means and the entire end of spiritual formation are found simply in being with our Lord. to some people that may come across as obvious or repetitive, but i don’t think we can overestimate how often we need that reminder in practice. nothing we do - our strict adherence to the rules, our commitment to a robust devotional life, the silencing of our conscience through good works - none of that can secure us a greater portion of God’s love and assurance; not because he’s just that tough to please but because Christ has already accomplished that work in its entirety for us. by faith, then, we can rest in that reality even in the desert or in desolation without wondering what we need to do to get out. we are loved, seen, and forgiven even there.

[reese b · Rating 4 out of 5]

I knew this book was going to be important to me when during the first chapter. I felt that Strobel and Coe took a peek inside my brain and cracked open my heart. It only makes the most sense that there will be seasons in my walk with Jesus. Each season has its purpose from harvest to pruning. This book reminds me of the Chris Renzema song “Let the Ground Rest.” The lyrics say “ God, He made four seasons and only one spring… You’re gonna grow, I know this But for now, just let the ground rest.”

This book is a reminder that just because the season feels dry does not mean you are stagnant or alone. I appreciate the chapters full of wisdom, real life experience, and at the end time for personal reflection! This was great!

THANK YOU BAKER BOOKS FOR THE COPY!

[Nikaley Chandler]

Not really sure how to rate this one. Since I went through the dark night of the soul a year ago, the way this book talks about seasons of consolation, desert, and desolation was so encouraging to me. What I experienced was normal. This book affirmed what I went through. However—a lot of this book felt a little over my head, or not explained well. I think examples of people’s stories would have made it such an easier read. I also don’t think they made this as practical as their first book. I found myself frustrated more than encouraged. All that said, I will read it again and probably recommend it to others with caveats.

[Michelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

God works in each individual believer’s life in different ways to draw him or her closer to him. Coe and Strobel provide a fantastic book that outlines the developmental process of being a Christian. I am able to see my life in God more clearly and can minster to others into the presence of God in more profound ways by seeing the ways God might be working in their lives. This book is for all who wish to draw near to God, call the local church their home, and seek to love their neighbor as themselves.

[Bradford Combs · Rating 3 out of 5]

I will need to reread this book, I think. I was struggling to comprehend their message and think maybe I was just starting to understand toward the end. I think the book could be helpful. It just didn't click right for me to get help from it, and that's probably a me problem moreso than the book or its authors.

[Nich Ross · Rating 3 out of 5]

A pastoral book on Christian responses to seasons of spiritual dryness. It looks at the temptation to overcome these seasons with spiritual practices and instead encourages readers to rely on the power and presence of Christ

[Drew · Rating 2 out of 5]

5 stars for what the authors are writing on, which is very helpful for the Christian life and not talked about enough.

1 Star for the way the book is written. It should be about 10 to 20 pages and restructured drastically.

[Will Cunningham-Batt · Rating 3 out of 5]

The thesis is what compelled me most - that when the Lord feels distant, we shouldn’t try and caffeinate our will through devotional practices, but we should rather should continue to abide in the Lord, pouring out our heart to him. However, the book reads like an extended blog post, with next to no Scripture engagement and little by way of concrete steps forward. Slightly disappointing.

[Pam Mooney · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love the perspective of "spiritual dry seasons. My favorite is the "experience" sections of the book as they reach me at a different level. As others have said, transformative.

[Wagner Floriani · Rating 3 out of 5]

Very enjoyable and encouraging, just wasn’t sold on the grounding framework.

[Joel Wentz · Rating 4 out of 5]

A forthright, honest, and theologically-informed reflection on the spiritual experience of desolation in the Christian life.

Video review here: https://youtu.be/u9o-6fVTYZk

[Riley Butler · Rating 4 out of 5]

A gift from a small group leader! A great tool for how to keep the faith and endure growth in the desert season.

[Ryan Ross · Rating 4 out of 5]

Right book at the right time for me.

[Heidi Creasman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great follow up to their first book, where prayer becomes real.

[Ben Bechtel · Rating 5 out of 5]

The best book I’ve ever read on spiritual formation. Paradigm shifting.